Date: Fri, 29 Jul 2005 21:13:05 +0200
From: Harry Anders <harry@harryanders.com>
Subject: 'Little Harry' 3. A crippled freaky alien, but he's my soul mate.

'Little Harry'
Chapter 3. A crippled freaky alien, but he's my soul mate.

Slowly I drifted into a slumber, until suddenly the doorbell rang and
harshly brought me back into the physical world. What time was it? Who
would try to pay me a visit this time in the evening? I took a couple of
deep breaths to regain my composure but that didn't help much, I only got
dizzy... I stumbled to the front door and opened it. A very tired John
looked up to me with a sad face and tears in his eyes:

"May I come in for a moment please?"

"Be my guest," I answered and beckoned him to the living room.

He slumped down onto the couch and started to cry. I put my arm around him
and he tried to disappear into me.

"Harry doesn't believe me any more!" he sobbed into my chest,

"I told him you didn't freak out on him, but he just will not listen."

"Ssh ssh..." I comforted him, "everything will end up well with your little
brother. Don't make this your problem!"

After some time John pulled himself together and told me the whole
story. In the afternoon the children eventually convinced Harry that I
really would accept him just as he was, that I was used to a boy with a
burnt face because of my own little brother who was about the same age and
was severely burnt too, that I had invited him myself and that I had asked
John and the children to bring him with them. After a while Harry
hesitantly decided to give it a chance.

That's where I found them in my front garden, the five children still
trying to convince little Harry that I really was okay. Then he freaked out
for the second time and he ran away again. At first he refused to tell them
what had happened, he just cried and cried...

After a lot of pushing he hesitantly told John that at first he felt
delighted when big Harry asked him for a hug, but he also was very nervous
and afraid of being rejected once big Harry really looked at his crippled
face. Then big Harry suddenly KISSED him! Everything in him melted and all
of a sudden he felt wonderful. Big Harry really accepted him, just as Jack
accepted him from the beginning. He could trust big Harry! He had a new Big
Friend!

Then he made the mistake of his life. He let his feelings take over and he
kissed his new friend back... and his new friend didn't react. Big Harry
didn't kiss him back, for he was too disgusted by those awfully crippled
lips suddenly touching his mouth. Big Harry just went to the table without
saying a word, lifted him onto his lap and turned him around, away from his
face, so that he didn't need to look at those awful scars and those ugly
red marks and those shriveled lips...

John collapsed onto my chest and again cried his heart out; this time
accompanied by me. Desperately he put his arms around me and I put my arms
around him and we sat together like that on the couch for a long time, both
sobbing and trying to comfort each other.

Why didn't I ask what that poor little boy WANTED this afternoon, instead
of simply assuming I did the right thing? Now everything went awfully
wrong. What a mess and what a lot of misunderstandings! How could I ever
explain this to little Harry, supposed he had the courage to come back
after those disappointments?

Another thing suddenly struck me: I took an enormous lot of
responsibilities onto my shoulders by letting this so vulnerable child
enter my life. This wasn't just a damaged boy, this was a boy that's
severely damaged in body AND in soul. I had to be very careful with him and
to deliberate everything I did or said. And I had to start right NOW.

"Is Harry already in bed?" I asked John after drying my eyes.

"No," John shook his head, still sniffling,

"he sat on the couch with my father and with Marrie. But my father told me
not to make this conversation too long, so I think I have to go back
now..."

"What do you think, shall I accompany you?" I asked him with some
hesitancy.

His face brightened: "That would be wonderful!"

We both went to the kitchen to wash our faces. Suddenly we looked at each
other and at the same time our faces neared and we kissed. Nothing special,
just a peck on the lips, but it felt wonderful, as if we sealed our
friendship. We both grinned and hugged for a few seconds.

"Thank you my friend!" I told him, ruffling his hair.

"Thank you too!" he answered with a smile from ear to ear.

He took my hand and piloted me to his house, five doors away in the same
street.

"That's where Thomas and Chrissy are living," he pointed to the fourth
house we passed by.

"We are neighbors. Harry always walks to them and to Jack's house via the
backyards."

John took the key out of his pocket, opened the door and we entered the
house. Soft music played somewhere in the background and the house very
lightly smelled of incense. It made me feel welcomed. John took me to the
living room and we entered the dimly lighted room.

Harry was lying on the ground playing some game of cards with Marrie and
Mark. He looked up and his eyes suddenly showed a lot of fear; but they
also showed something else that made my heart jump in my chest. Could this
be love? He didn't look away and he held my gaze.

"Hi my friend!" I told him with some trepidation,

"it's nice to see you again. I wanted to give you the kiss back you offered
me this afternoon."

I kneeled and stretched my arms out just like I did before. I could feel
his eyes burn into me, I felt them search my soul for the truth. Was I
really sincere? Could he really trust me? Suddenly his eyes brightened and
his face lit up. Slowly he stood up and he approached me with his hands
outstretched.

"I'm sorry..." he mumbled and he leapt into my arms, burying his face into
my chest.

Never in my life did I cry so much as today and now little Harry cried with
me; but this time our tears were tears of joy. We had found each other.

I have no idea how long we stood there, melting into each other, rubbing
our faces together, looking into each others eyes, grinning like crazy, and
kissing each other. He kissed me and I kissed him back. A lot of small
pecks on the lips, but it felt wonderful, like coming home. I had found my
soul mate!

After I don't know how long I carefully put him down and looked
around. Mark looked at us from the floor with his mouth wide open, and did
I read some jealousy in his eyes? Marrie sat next to Mark with tears in her
eyes and softly sniffled. John proudly stood on my left side, nearly
touching us, also with tears in his eyes and sniffling.

On the couch a woman I hadn't met before looked at us with tears in her
eyes and a handkerchief in her hands. She looked first at little Harry and
then at me, and her eyes radiated love and understanding.

In an armchair a tall man nervously smoked a cigarette. His eyes drifted
from Harry to me to his wife to his children and back to Harry and me; and
he clearly was not at ease with the situation.

I draped my arm around little Harry who immediately melted into me, and
approached the woman.

"Sorry for invading your house like this," I apologized,

"but I thought it was the best thing I could do to help our little friend
over here."

I ruffled his hair and he looked up to me with adoration in his eyes,
melting into me even further.

"Please call me Trudy," the woman answered with a smile,

"and I am glad you are here! We were really at a loss today and we didn't
know what to do to help Harry out of his desperation. Even the children
couldn't reach him any more. They talked and talked with him but he just
didn't listen and kept on crying. There was even a moment I was angry at
you for bringing him into this situation..."

She shamefully looked at the ground and wiped her eyes with the
handkerchief.

"That's not fair! It wasn't Harry's fault!" John suddenly interrupted,

"he did everything he could do, and nobody could imagine what little Harry
was thinking or why he was freaking out again!"

His eyes shot daggers at his mother and he balled his fists in
frustration. Suddenly little Harry pushed my arm away and straightened his
shoulders. He left me, turned around and faced John with an astonishing
proudness in his posture.

"No John, you can impossible know why I freaked out. You are not a gypsy
boy with a crippled body and a freaky face. They never make fun of you and
they don't point at you on the streets. You don't have to hide yourself and
you don't have to go to your friends via the backyards. You can impossible
know what I am feeling every day and why I am so shy and so frightened. You
just can't feel my pain and my fears..."

He threw his small arms around John and hugged him for a moment. He turned
around, took my arm and draped it over his shoulders. He melted into me
again and at that moment I could FEEL his power. Wow, what a boy! And I
thought I had to protect HIM?

He looked up to me and I looked deep into his beautiful eyes. I saw a lot
of proudness in them but also a small boy asking for approval. Did i do the
right thing? I smiled at him and ruffled his hair and immediately his eyes
lit up again. It felt like a conversation without words...

"Boys, girl, time to go to bed!" the man in the armchair suddenly
announced, looking at the clock on the wall.

"Come on, upstairs, all of you! NOW!"

Hesitantly little Harry left my arm and he looked at me with desperation in
his eyes.

"Please can I sleep with you tonight?"

"Yes dad!" John immediately interrupted,

"that's a good idea! Tonight I can have my own room back!"

He looked at me. Did I understand the hidden meaning behind his words? Of
course I did. I winked at him and his face brightened. We understood each
other.

"Well..." dad answered, impatiently looking at the clock,

"I am not so sure. I will have a talk with this man first, and after that
we shall see."

"Do you wake me up when you are going home?" Harry asked me with a hint of
fear in his voice.

"Yes, I promise!" I answered and reluctantly he followed the rest out of
the room, longingly looking back.

"Sorry I didn't introduce myself," dad told me with a lot of sarcasm in his
voice,

"but my name is Eric."

He extended his hand and I shook it. It felt quite the opposite of a 'firm
grip'... I had to be very careful with this man. He would do everything to
'prove his right' even when he was wrong. How could a man like this breed a
boy like John? He motioned me to the other armchair and I sat down.

"Do you want coffee?"

"Yes please, with no milk and two lumps of sugar."

Trudy went to the kitchen and Eric started to inquire me.

It was an unpleasant one way conversation. Eric told me how two years ago
neighbor Jack was found on his own driveway by his children and their
friends, crying like a baby, and they dragged him with them as a stray
puppy. Jack seemed rather charmed of some small gypsy boy who had been in
hospital for a while and now was delivered to an orphanage. He surely
didn't approve but his wife insisted on taking the boy into their custody
so he could be with that Jack. But now the boy was in his custody and he
was now responsible for where the boy lived and of course especially where
he was sleeping! Sleeping with Jack was no problem for he and Jack seemed
to know each other and he had his own room in Jack's house, but I was a
stranger to the boy and he didn't know me and of course people would talk
again... and he didn't like that cuddling and that kissing between me, a
stranger, and his boy. Who was I? Was I married? Did I have children of my
own?

I was totally perplexed. What kind of an interrogation was this? For a
moment I thought about leaving and slamming the door, but then I certainly
would loose my newly found little friends and that was the last thing I
wanted... I started to defend myself.

"I have been married but I divorced a couple of years ago, and I do have
two children of my own who..."

Suddenly Trudy interrupted me with a furious look at Eric.

"Our John likes this man. In fact our John likes him a lot! And you should
KNOW that John is a very good judge of character, unlike you my dear! You
always immediately start to criticize and belittle people. But I have
enough of that. I trust this man because our John trusts him, and our
little Harry already adores him! Little Harry is free to go to him whenever
he wants, and all our children are allowed to meet him whenever they
want. And from this moment YOU shut up!"

She sat herself down onto the couch like a queen and broadly smiled at me.

"Go get him, he is yours. I know you belong to each other, I can read it in
your eyes. Tomorrow we will help you to reinstall his room, and the
children will help you with the transport of his belongings, just like two
months ago. It is clear that you and he love each other a lot. That boy
needs you and I think you are needing him too..."

She pointed to the stairs in the hallway.

"Second door to the left and his clothes are on his chair. Do you need help
with dressing?"

I managed to shake my head and speechlessly climbed the stairs to John's
room. Second door to the left...

The room was very dark so I clicked the lights on. First I saw John, curled
up like a ball, his head just above the blankets and lightly snoring. In
the other bed little Harry was lying on his back, his damaged face
peacefully resting on a pillow. He had thrown his blankets back and a
moment I was in shock. My little brother was burnt on his face, his throat
and his hands, but this boy seemed to be burnt everywhere! Raw stripes
showed on his chest in three different colors, together with scars of
operations and a lot of wild flesh. A few ribs were showing through the
skin and everything seemed to be too tight. I could imagine a lot of
operations would be needed in the future...

Carefully I lifted the blankets and again I was shocked when I saw the rest
of his body. His belly seemed less affected by the fire but his right hip
was a real mess of wild flesh and scars in all different colors. His little
pecker looked weird, also rather damaged. His left leg looked less
affected, but his right leg was a mess too. What a drama!

"Harry..."

Gently I called his name and yawning he opened his eyes. A broad smile told
me he immediately recognized me and lazily he stretched his arms
out. Carefully I took him into my arms and I lifted him onto my lap, this
time facing me.

"Am I going to live with you now?" he asked, yawning again.

"That's up to you. If you wish..." I answered, looking at him with some
trepidation.

"Of course silly!" he answered with a smile from ear to ear and he jumped
off my lap towards his clothes.

He dressed himself with a little help from me and in the meanwhile we
talked. He told me he always slept in the nude because his scars started to
itch after a few hours. Jack sometimes massaged him with some oil and that
helped, but John didn't know where the bottle was. He could only wear
underwear that was two sizes too big but that was no problem for he already
was used to that. Normal underwear itched too much after a while and
whenever possible he preferred to be naked. He hated sleeping alone so most
of the time he slept with John in the same bed. But tonight he knew I would
take him with me and he didn't want to wake up John so he decided to sleep
in the other bed. His belongings were stowed away since he shared John's
room but of course now he could have his own room back in Jack's
house... sorry, his own room in MY house.

I had never heard him so talkative and I was delighted. He seemed to be a
bright conversationalist. When I asked him a question he first thought for
a moment and then he always came with a really intelligent answer. My boy
seemed to be a very talented boy.

I lifted him onto my shoulders and we went downstairs, both giggling and
trying to tickle each other. Eric seemed to have left the room and Trudy
sat on the couch with a sad face and with tears in her eyes. I put little
Harry down and she lovingly hugged him, telling him he was a very lucky
boy.

"Yes, I certainly am!" he answered her, beaming and tenderly returning her
hug.

I thanked her for her trusting me and again lifted little Harry onto my
shoulders what again caused a lot of giggles. With his feet dangling free
and his small hands clamped around my head I took him with me to my house.

Sorry, I took him with me to OUR house.


Harry AnderS, alternative writer.


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