Date: Fri, 5 Oct 2001 19:39:10 -0700
From: Robert Just  Robert <Kewl_Dad_1@msn.com>
Subject: Lost in fear-Chapter three

Lost in fear
Chapter three
"You are my sunshine."

	We sat hugging for sometime as Jimmy quietly sobbed and I tried to
digest what I had just heard.  What was I going to do now.  As far as the
authorities were concerned, I was as guilty as his parents.  Sure I was a
boylover, but I could never hurt or force a boy to do anything and I hated
those who could.  But, what could I do?  I had to think fast and my plan
had to be a good one.
	When Jimmy had composed himself, he went off to the bathroom while
I collected my thoughts.  He returned after about fifteen minutes, I
guessed he had to move his bowels but I didn't ask.  He had washed his face
and looked almost like the happy boy I had taken shopping hours before.  I
had to know more but, I didn't want to make him go through any more today.
	"Okay buddy."  I began. "This is what we have to do until I can
figure things out."
	"I'll do anything so long as I can stay here."  He said meekly.
	"First..I don't think we should go out anymore.  I was stupid for
parading you all over town like I did.  Let's just hope no one remembers
us, in case your parents are looking for you."
	"They don't care.  They won't look.  They don't care if I'm dead."
He said sadly.
	"Well maybe, but at some point they have to file some kind of
report or they could be in big trouble when someone figures out you are
missing.  What about school, won't they miss you there?"  I tried hard to
explain things in a way that a kid could understand.
	"I never went to school...least not here.  We only moved here last
month.  We lived in Little Rock before."  He said looking small and
fragile.
	I hugged him and looked into his eyes. "That could be a good thing.
Probably only your folks know you are missing at this point.  I can take a
week off work while we figure things out.  I need to check the news and
newspapers to see if anyone has reported you missing."
	I watched the local news and there was no report of any missing
boys.  And I found the morning paper still in my paper box out out front.
Still no reports of missing boys.  I sighed a breath of relief..so far so
good.  I ordered pizza for supper and Jimmy seemed back to his normal
hungry boy self.  We settled down on the couch after supper and Jimmy
stretched out with his little feet in my lap.  Feet just happen to be one
of my favorite boy parts.  I couldn't help but admire their perfectness.  I
finally started rubbing them gently and he purred like a kitten at my
touch.  This poor kid was so starved for any kind of affection.  I felt
good about what I had done for him so far and I knew I would never hurt
this precious soul.  I glanced over at him and his eyes were closed and he
was breathing softly.  I smiled, happy that he felt so safe and comfortble
with me.  I let him lay there until the nightly news was over.  Still no
reports of a missing boy, so I picked him up gently and carried him to my
bed.
	He barely stirred as I removed his clothing, leaving him only in
his new white briefs.  I tucked him in and kissed his forehead.  As I
turned to go he reached his tiny hand out and grabbed my arm.
	"Will you sing to me?"  He asked dreamily.
	"Well, I'm not much of a singer, but I'll sing you the song my dad
used to sing to me.  I always went right to sleep."
	I lay down beside him on top of the covers and started softly
singing. "You are my sunshine...My only sunshine...you make me happy..when
skies are grey...you'll never know dear...how much I love you...please
don't take my sunshine away."  I had a tear in my eye and I was beginning
to choke up remembering my dad and how much he had loved me.  It broke my
heart to know that until now no one loved this little boy lying beside me.
I hugged him tight and was happy to see that he was sound asleep.  I got up
quietly and tip-toed out of the room.
	I needed some time to think.  I called my boss at work and
explained that I had a family emergency and needed the week off.  My boss
was a really nice guy and he showed genuine concern and assurred me it was
no big deal and to let him know if I needed anything.  That done, I sat
down with a beer and began to formulate a plan.  Something in my brain told
me that things would work out, but I didn't know then just how that could
happen.  I decided that at some point I had to contact or visit his
parents.  I was absolutely scared shit-less at that prospect.  I was no
fighter and from what Jimmy had told me, his step dad sounded like one mean
dude.  I couldn't think of any good reason for what I had done other than I
wanted to help a boy in trouble.  I knew most people could never accept
that as a valid reason, that they had to assume that a single male picking
up a nine year old boy had only evil on his mind.
	I finished my beer and started my second.  The phone suddenly rang
and I almost peed my pants.  I was shaking as I picked it up.  It was my
dad.
	"Dad, what's up?"  I said with relief.  I hadnt't heard from him in
a few months and always enjoyed talking with him.
	We chatted for over an hour and I felt the warmth and love that
this man had always given me.  I felt good about myself as I hung up with a
heart felt "I love you."  and found I had tears in my eyes.  I went to
check on my little angel and found him on top of the covers, I guess he had
gotten hot.  He looked so cute lying there and suddenly I knew what I would
do.  But first I needed a good nights sleep.  I took a shower, shaved and
peed and slipped on some boxers before climbing in beside Jimmy.  He found
me in his sleep and snuggled close.  I remembered snuggling up to my father
when I was small and he always made me feel safe and loved.  I drifted off
to sleep and slept a dreamless, restfull sleep.