Date: Tue, 16 Oct 2001 14:53:36 -0400
From: paul paris <shaksbeer@ureach.com>
Subject: Pawn to King Four    Part 8

This story is from my imagination and is pure fiction. It was the first
story I ever wrote and has been encouraged to send it to Nifty. I have
proofreaders who have said the story should remain almost as it was first
done.

It is a story about a Man and Boy/s love so please do check because in some
countries this kind of thing is not allowed.

I have the copyright so if you wish to use it or any of my other stories
please do ask. Fee paying sites will be refused.

I am dyslexic and my computer does most of the word. I thank you all for
the emails you have sent and I am sorry that did not include tissues with
part six.

This chapter was very important in getting the story to become as realistic
as my thoughts allowed. It therefore is up to you to make the judgment of
the first few paragraphs. We are half way through so there is still a long
way to go but the course of life changes all the time.



                                       Pawn to King Four.


                                       Chapter 8



I have read through the story so far again myself and I now have to put
something to you. Please have an open mind reading this chapter. Please
decide for yourself if the character Chris, formally known as Jack is
either a Paedophile or boy lover?

Is this situation just lust or is it Love. Could lust turn to Love well
that's another question but when this was first written by me I never came
to any conclusions. Even now I think your conclusion that will make all the
difference.


.. Today was the start of a new life. Where have I heard that before? It
was I that was to start anew. Here I was preparing breakfast for 2 boys who
less than 2 weeks ago I never new. Yes of course it was fast, but being
lost is not nice at all. When I say lost I mean being as they were in an
Orphanage with nothing but so called Uncles or Aunts and being over looked
by a live in Headmaster. That's how I saw it. I was a boy lover yes but had
started to grow up so the sexual side of my nature was beginning to
change. The one thing that happened was Anders had gotten to know about my
earlier life through no persuasion on my part. That sounds bad really. He
was in contact with people at the place he lived who had almost taken
advantage of him also his younger brother. Being one of the longest
children their I think he took this as part of everyday life so had to
perform his part. I felt very sorry for him but did not expect this child
to make a move towards me.

Now a few years back we would not be feeling this way, instead I would be
just part of the stastics. Another adult who did all he could to get a
boy. Well it was not quite that bad. Now there was this house that
contained a man and two boys, one of whom was desperate for his love but
had never been able to show it. Sorry if this is confusing but imagine how
I was feeling. There was this boy offering me his love in every way
possible and I was like a schoolboy with a crush. I have to admit that I
prepared the boys' breakfasts then stood and watched Anders shower. Mug of
tea to my lips and he smiled without a care in the world.

 His hair was long and the colour of honey. I could see every inch of him
He was un-cut with a small sack underneath. Well-shaped hands and feet. I
wished the mug were a camera. To capture beauty is the joy of all
photographers. Water off and he rubbed vigorously to dry. I took a smaller
towel and started to dry his hair. As each strand dried the curls formed
until he looked better than the night before. Placing the towels over the
rail I picked up his underclothes which he had slept in. "Do they need
washing?" He took a long time to look at them. "Do you mind if we throw
them away? I pointed to the bin and they were gone. I went with Anders to
get Clot (Colin) up He was having trouble finding his school clothes. I
brought out the things I had brought the day before. It took some time
before they realised that the new clothes would make them become
human. Their words not mine. Now I will say something that may help in the
choice I mentioned. I was more use to undressing the boys I had known but
today I watched as the boys dressed in new clothes. They both were so smart
and the only argument we had was with Anders.

You must get a Haircut after school." Oh dear He did not like that Idea at
all so I took things as I wanted them to continue. "All the time you live
in this house, your houses there are certain things to follow. My rules are
one and that means a haircut. Clot you to." I looked in the Mirror "Right
that's settled we will all get one." I checked on their clothes and I have
to say they did look very smart. I told them to get some breakfast while I
sorted their Jackets out. When I was done I realised that I had not washed
or changed. With lightening speed I showered dressed then shaved. Clot
looked on at me shaving. It was a funny sensation being watched doing what
had become a singular private thing. I knew that it was going to be a daily
occurrence so asked Clot to feel my chin. "Soft and smooth." I thanked him
cleaned up and joined the boys in the kitchen. Anders had washed up with
Clot putting the things away. "That's the chore done but you have forgot
one thing Chris." I followed the boys and saw them making their beds. It
was then that I realised just how institutionalised they had become.

I took each jacket showing them which button went where. I know it may
sound silly but their old clothes had no jacket just coats. I bundled them
up so that the home could maybe make use of them again. I did not know how
many people had used the coats that they had. We did run into a problem
though. Their new shoes. The boys were scared to wear them in case they got
dirty. Explaining that polish would put that right was like teaching a
lesson in school. So the agreement was that we would all have a go at it
when we got home. It was simple. Now it was I with a fear. I had never
polished my shoes in years so I would be learning all over again. Just as
we were about to go I got a simultaneous hug quite unexpectedly from both
boys. It was then that I kissed each head with "Now be good today." There
you have the morning that started the rest of our lives.

School was strange. I missed Anders in his new class but I even missed Clot
who was re-tested and got a place in a real class so there I was without my
family hoping to cope without them

The end of the day both boys were at the car waiting for me. Their tales of
fun and excitement pleased me. What pleased me more was a whisper from
Anders "I have missed you so much." I don't know about you but when you
were at a big school there were certain things that never happened. The
worst being letting anyone see you kiss your mum. Definite ridicule
time. But in-between the "Goodnight Sir" Anders Kissed me. 2 boys came up
to him and said, "Cool so your dad's the teacher here?" Anders answered,
"Yes." Clot shouted, "He's my dad to." So that's when it became clear that
the boys both had what they had been looking for. We dropped their old
clothes of at the Home allowing the boys to parade their new things in
front of the staff. I admit it was good for me to. Both got to the back of
the car when I said my farewells then we drove safely back home. For tea I
made meatballs and rice, then we all went and had a haircut without a
single argument. I allowed my feeling to pop out when I stroked Anders head
and told him how much I loved him. "I know Chris, I know." I got in to
drive "Chris what about me?" that was Clot. "Well you are a real cutie and
from now on we will call you Colin." This 10year old said something strange
which surprised me but also Anders. "That's all I have ever wanted."

They managed to change without help into some play clothes. We all then sat
to polish our shoes. It was very good. I cleared up and thought about some
television, but both were doing homework. I could not help myself but took
a drink to them and kissed my boys saying how proud I was. As I left them
to their work Colin shouted, "Chris you will be our dad now won't you?" I
smiled. "I will try." Both the boys ran to me. "That's all they wanted to
know." We all broke into laughter. I realised then that this was the first
time I had really heard them Laugh. I sat but put away the whisky because I
could feel that Anders and Colin would make me more relaxed than any bottle
could.

Colin's work was very simple but he took is seriously. A picture of joy. He
had chosen the school uniform that he had worn at school today. Anders had
a lot more so it gave me time to spend with Colin while he got ready for
bed. We went through the same thing as the night before. Tonight though I
washed his Hair in a shampoo that did not sting his eyes. There was a
flannel he could use but when I used my hands for no other reason than
ease, I was shown no resistance. I did make a slight error because while I
dried him in the bedroom then dressing him I asked about the home. In fact
I asked what he and the others did there. "Anders told you didn't he?" I
claimed the fifth by just being curious. Colin although 10 was not
stupid. He did express his feelings about the man and boys that did things
to him. I could openly see and hear the guilt from within him. I had to lie
by saying that as a young boy he was taken advantage off. A light went on
in my brain. Why was I talking like this to a child? He was confused. My
only inclination was to ask him if he enjoyed what had happened. ""Well,
some of the things. I cannot talk about them. I was told not to or Anders
would get hurt. I stopped the man one night because I was sick so he made
me watch while he took Anders clothes off. Mr Plover came in. He gave
Anders his clothes and asked the night man to leave the next morning. He
asked me to see how easy it was to get my brother so I did things with
him. "Colin you will not have to do anything you do not want here unless it
is a chore that is on the chart for the week. The worst part for me; While
he told me all this I had managed to get his pyjama jacket on but was so
involved in what he was saying that his trousers were on his bed. His
bottom was in my lap. I took my thoughts back to when boys first interested
me. I was even honest with myself. I did not have an erection all I had was
pure contempt for what had happened to Colin. "Chris I do not think it
would be wrong to do things with you." I took a deep breath. "Oh my boy. If
I did what they had done to you I would no longer have the right to want to
be your Dad." We hugged I managed to complete the dressing. Colin had
become a baby so I did all the work. We walked hand in hand to the kitchen
for a hot drink.

Anders had finished his work so joined us in the kitchen. I was pleased
with the effort made on his first day. I took my Colin to his bed and
managed to fight with him while he tried under the covers. I sat there
stroking this cherub's head while taking my turn to read the unfinished
story from last night. I failed. Colin was asleep. I left him and began to
clear up, removing the washing to the basket then realised that the one
thing missing was toys. I had not thought about it before so a trip to the
store for some basic things would be placed upon the list "To Do."

Anders was standing with his drink looking at his photo again. I smiled at
the thought of children in the house. I sat in my chair to rest but when
the voice said, "Chris can we have a serious talk?" I was sure that I would
not get much rest until my head hit the pillow.

"I have been thinking hard. I do now believe that I need to see a
doctor. Before you say anything I will explain. Please I find this
embarrassing but I know I can talk to you." I patted the arm of the chair
to show that I was there to help. " I was 5years old when I went to the
home, I think you know. I even told you about what happened there. When it
happened to me I did not mind but have not thought it different because a
lot of the boys were doing things. One boy when he saw me being undressed
said the next day that I was a funny boy, Queer. I know that is not
true. When I first helped you I saw them pictures, you know which ones and
I liked them. Well today, well tonight on the way home from school, I have
fallen in love with someone." I was quiet. "Anders I am very happy for
you. What is her name?" He began to laugh. I reminded him that Colin was
asleep. "Sorry but its not a girl." Alarm bells sounded in the brain. "So
you have feelings for a boy. Does he feel the same for you?" Anders sat on
the floor. He looked at me. "I do not know but I have this secret that only
I know. I will share it with you because you shared a secret with me. If
this person were at the home I would do everything I could to tell him. I
would tell him I loved him and my special wish would be to spend the night
with him. I do not know what boys do but I would still ask."

I thought about asking who he was, being that I knew most of the boys at
school but decided that it would be to intrusive. "I am right am I not that
you know how babies are made?" Anders looked at me just like the children
do who are interested in the lesson you are teaching. "Yes Chris I know." I
gave him a very brief sentence that explained what boys did. "You mean they
do things to each other then make babies?" This may be harder than I
thought. "No they do things and they produce what makes a baby." I was
pleased that it was said. "I hear that they do it in their bottoms as
well?" I thought. "Well Anders you have the basic idea's of what
happens. There is a whole lot more but that comes with practice."

"One last question Chris. When would be the best time to ask them?" Well
the old me came out because I explained what had happened to a friend, it
was I actually. This friend told the other boy but he was given a black eye
so you have to be sure. If the boy was not at your school it may be
easier. I would be sure before you do or say anything." Anders looked at
the photographs again then at me "But I am sure. I have never been so sure
about how I feel and love them. I just do not want to make a mistake and
loose this feeling forever." I suggested that he get ready for bed and take
a hot bath. "That way my boy you will relax and think better." I kissed his
cheek then he made his way to the bathroom. I sat and broke with my
previous days legacy and poured a large Whisky.

Anders took his time. I heard him go to his room after the bath then came
back to the room to pack up his school things. "Has the bath made you feel
any better?" without looking at me I heard "Yes, much." I looked up and
waited for Anders to return. He did get back all ready for bed. He was in a
pair of orange pyjamas that were a pair of the new collection. "That looks
better than last night." He was very quiet until "I will take my chances
and tell him." I never agreed but I made sure that he knew no matter what
happened I would be here for him. It was something that was playing on his
mind because he was unable to settle. I could not do anything but it was
such a big thing for a boy of 12. "Anders can I ask you something?" I got a
nod straight away. Do you know what Gay is? He looked puzzled. "A boy who
likes boys may be called a homosexual, because he would not want to be with
a girl. If you want this boy to be your boyfriend then be prepared to be
called all these kind of names if anything goes wrong. Maybe if you were on
your own it would help. I will be here in case."

"Oh Chris. Its you I am in love with. Its you I would have gone with at the
home. I knew that as soon as we met but I took a chance to tell you by
getting into your bed. Nothing happened. You told me that you should have
got in the bed. Since you said that I have had nothing but the feeling of
love for you. I do not know what would have happened but you are a good
teacher so I would be the pupil. I now live in this house, sorry our house
with the person who I most love in the world." Anders went to get a
book. "I found this book downstairs. It told me what would happen to men
who do things to children. People say it is bad, very bad. I am asking you
to be the one who will love me for the rest of my life. I thought this in
the bath. I would love to do everything with you. Well I have said it
now. Don't forget your promise. You would be there for me no matter what."

"Anders I don't know what to say. You are very special to me. I may have
given you the wrong thoughts when I said there was something special in
your bedside draw. I was not meaning to say what you are telling me now."
What a load of crap. I was saying that. I loved Anders but agreed with
myself that I would and could never hurt him in case he became another
statistic like Simon was. I loved him the moment we spoke while looking at
the pictures. He was right I should have jumped into bed with him. But now
things had changed. Anders had professed his love for me. I was being
seduced in a child's way to give him the love he thought it easy to ask
for. "Chris will you do me a favour please." I would do anything for the
boys but this was yes for Anders. "Please go and take a hot bath then think
things over." It helped me.

 I got up taking short steps towards Anders. "You know how much you mean to
me. I will take a bath. If I said yes then we could both be in serious
trouble." Anders looked into my eyes. "You mean you would get sent to
prison if found out. How can you think I would allow the one I love to be
sent away because of something that was down to me." I was going to say
something but his finger touched my lips. "Go take that bath now." I had to
smile "Okay boss, will do." Any other time my predatory feelings would have
shined through and I would have been trying to get him into bed before the
end of that first meeting. Now here I was blushing after being proposed
to. The answer was to be no. The thoughts that no one would ever find out
ever crossed my mind. Anders was 12. He wanted me for a boyfriend. I wanted
him as a boy. I had other things to think about here. I looked at it
another way. My son to be wanted to make love to his dad. That was just
theory. My skin was starting to wrinkle so I got out of the water. I
dried. On the floor of the living room was an orange pyjama jacket rolled
and poked between the legs of the outstretched trousers. It was an
arrow. It pointed to the bedroom. My room. In the bed Anders lay. Arms
above the covers he was looking at me. "Please say yes. I want to be with
you tonight. Let me love you."

"Anders you know I want to don't you." His smile was intoxicating." You
know if this happens things won't ever be the same." The smile changed
"Chris it will not be the same because we will both be in love, stronger
love than anyone would ever imagine. Drop the towel, I will pull back the
sheet then let see what happens." So I did drop the towel. Anders pushed
back the sheet. Our life of love was about to start.

Hugging each other naked was a strange experience. We could feel each other
shaking. The first kiss was featherlike. I looked at Anders lying next to
me. His nudity was like a magnet that drew us together.  He used one finger
to stroke up and down my body making comments of love after each
movement. I used my hand to cup the sweet young erection connected to the
jelly like feel in his sack beneath. The small balls had a movement like
yoyos until we both were beginning to feel the love and sexual feeling that
we both sought. Anders was saying word after word, all the meanings of love
that he had come to understand. We lay together. "Chris, teach me to love
and tell me what to do." I was almost in tears with joy. We neither wanted
this to start or finish to quickly. "If it will not hurt to much I want you
inside me but I also want to do the same to you. It was my turn now to say
how I was feeling. It took some time and at the end Anders said, "I knew
that we would want each other." I turned Anders on his back "Yes my lover I
want you so very much. Why, I do not know but I turned the light on above
the bed. I closely looked at this naked gem. Lags apart our lips kissed
again. It was that very moment we started to love like it had never been
done by either of us, to any one in our lives before. Anders held my penis
grasping it as if he was stuck to it. "Rub like this." I started to rub
him. He quickly copied. I managed to kiss his neck. This I could not
remember doing to any others before. We spoke about the sensations
including the sperm that was produced at the height of excitement. I made
Anders understand that being so young he might produce no sperm but he
would feel the enjoyment.

There I was with a boy of my heart making love as if it was just something
that happened every day. I remembered Anders request but thought better of
it. Getting inside him was something for a later date; today I wanted to
make him feel as his words made me. The smell of the cleanliness combined
with potential puberty was something not to be forgotten. I gave in to my
boy lovers' instinct and moistened a finger then gently as I could insert
it. The other Hand rubbed his penis. Combine all this with the kissing and
you can see it was something to behold. I slid down his smooth flesh
allowing his penis to enter my lips, then back to the fingers. Anders said
firmly "All the way Chris, all the way." Like a wild horse he bucked under
me. Just as I thought he was calming I felt movements in my fingers Five,
Six, Seven, I lost count. "What was that?" I just whispered "So now you
know I love you." I never came that night. Anders did several times. He
cried with happiness with one but I got him to take it easy. "Chris this
was fantastic. I could never know that true love would feel so
good. Promise that things will never change." I then told him one fact that
most people had come to terms with. "Oh precious one day you may find
someone far better than I. When that day comes please lets agree that we
both will understand what we have had together." I know that we never
bothered with the sheet. The nakedness gave us both enough warmth to sleep
well. Early the next morning I woke to see Andres on his side staring at me
"I cannot believe what happened last night." I turned to face him "Well it
is early so tell me why." Turning on his back with his hands behind his
head he said, "Like you for me I care a great deal, but I never believed
that you would want to love me after all the boys you have seen and maybe
been with. I am old and ordinary." I showed another side of me, "Anders, I
have never wanted to love anyone more than I do you. I do not know how long
it will last but I am sure going to enjoy being the one who is seduced by a
schoolboy." His face looked as if he was about to cry. Not happiness though
it was so sad " Oh Chris I cannot believe that any boy would be able to be
in love with their dad like me. You are a nice teacher but to think my
teacher did last night, what we did, well it's strange. Just be who you
are. Be whatever you want. Just understand a girl has got nothing on
you. What I mean is I love you enough for you to have been the first and
forever. Dad teach me to Love. I want you to see the first fluid then we
will never part." I held Anders not saying a word but thinking of the
paragraph that said his parents would have to agree to the adoption. If
they knew what their son was like I doubt they would want him but then
again I would be in prison to. I had crossed the point where I would have
to trust Anders with all my secrets. Colin had never gone through my mind
but he was to be another move in this real life game of chess.


Comments welcome. Flames will be ignored and extinguished.

Write to shaksbeer@ureach.com.

Part 9 of Pawn to King Four will follow.