Date: Fri, 26 Aug 2005 23:31:54 -0700 (PDT)
From: Snwdemon <snwdemon@yahoo.com>
Subject: Rodie's Story: Playing the Game Chapter 3: (M/b, b/b, M/F as, no sex)

	WARNING: This story contains descriptions of sexual acts involving
MINOR boys.  I wish to explain that this story is not true!  Further, it is
not intended to promote illegal acts against minors, but to demonstrate
that young boys can love each other even when adults believe that they are
too young.  The sexual acts described in the story are the result of my
imagination.  I have not performed these acts, and I do not encourage
others to perform them with minors.  If the subject of boy/boy or
homosexual love between minors offends you, or this material is illegal to
possess in your place of residence, or if you are under the legal age to
possess such material, do not read further!

	By downloading this story: You implicitly declare and affirm under
penalties of perjury that you are not a minor or in the company of a minor
and are entitled to have access to material intended for mature,
responsible members of society capable of making decisions about the
content of documents they wish to read ."  The story is copyrighted under
my pseudonym, Snwdemon.  A copy has been placed in these archives for your
enjoyment.  The story cannot be used to derive monetary gain.  However, if
you want to place a copy of this story in your free access archives please
email me for my permission.  The story cannot be placed in archives that
require payment for access, or printed and distributed in any form that
requires payment either directly or indirectly.  Any similarity to
individuals, living, or dead, is partially accidental.  Reference is also
made in context to locations, businesses, characters, and people to define
the story line.  No other implication about the true sexuality or actions
of the people, or places mentioned is intended.

       	Author's note: Alas, we have finally reached the threshold.  As you
know now, This is the true beginning of the second part of Rodie's story.
I had to include the ending that I had cut out from the first story, or I
would have had to eliminate a couple of characters, such as Mark and Marco,
in order to connect this story to the first.  I finally decided, after
re-reading the erotic version of Rodie's love, to do neither.  Once I get
my website up, You will have both versions of Rodie's Love, as well as the
sequels to both of those stories.  Now while I am trying to keep the
general outline from the original "Playing the game," this version that I'm
posting on Nifty is totally different from the original.  I am writing this
version as we speak, and while the outcome is the same as the original, the
details are completely different as well as the characters.  Well, in truth
this is the fourth writing of this chapter after I discarded the first
three.  It is much harder to create a good story than to just throw some
words and sentences onto the page.  As I stated in the first chapter's
author's note, I am going to age the characters 3 years.  So hold one while
I jump us forward a bit.  Thank you all for everyone who has responded so
far.  God Bless.  Damion



Playing the game: Rodie's story cont ^Ö Chapter 3.  (Chapter was edited and
proofed by BenBear and Miguel Sanchez)


Chapter 3: The dilemma


7 months and 12 days later -- March 1, 2000.

	Jim was worried as he hobbled around the house, and checking the
overall progress of the new construction.  For over a month now, Jim had
been feeling it as Rodie slipped deeper into depression.  When he went to
visit him two days ago, Rodie hardly acknowledged that anyone was there
with him, let alone Jim.  This was so not like Rodie because every time he
had visited him, Rodie would struggle to move until he could lean on him.
However, in the last week or so, Rodie's moods had shifted drastically.
Instead of being almost normal most of the time, now it was only for a
brief moment, then crying the next, and now he just acted as if he were
numb to everything and everyone.  Jim knew what was happening to Rodie
because he had gone through it himself.  He knew that this was the hardest
part of recovering, and that was dealing with the pain.  Once the bones
heal after this kind of surgery, the nerves do not heal themselves
completely.  This is why that person will have a certain amount of pain to
deal with for the rest of their lives.

	Rodie was trying to deal with his pain, but so far, he has been
unable to.  Jim tried to help him by having Rodie give him some of his
pain, but Rodie refused to do that.  He was afraid that by doing that, then
he would be hurting him even after Jim explained to him things to help
control the pain.  Jim went and got a fresh cup of coffee from the large
coffee maker he had gotten for the workers.  The renovations to the house
was nearly finished, and Jim had hoped that Rodie would have recovered
enough to come home by now.  However, Jim and the others had watched him
struggle in his war against the constant pain, regaining his motor
functions, and it was clear that Rodie was losing that war.  Jim took his
fresh cup of coffee into the Den and sat in the recliner.  Eddie, Marco,
Cathy, and him have been living in the beach house since Rodie had come out
of the coma.  Each one of them would take turns to come here and supervise
the workers in order to have the renovations completed on time.  Today was
his turn, yet he could not relax because of Rodie.

	Rodie had given Jim his special gift so that they would always be
connected together.  However, Jim learned quickly that what Rodie could do,
and had done it too, was to block him out of his mind.  Jim did not mind
this though because he knew that Rodie had to have his privacy sometimes.
The problem now was that Rodie was now refusing to use any of his abilities
anymore.  Since Rodie had awakened from the coma, Mike had him put into a
physical therapy program so that his muscles and joints did not atrophy and
stiffen.  It required that Rodie's limbs be flexed to keep the muscles
stretched, and then he would go through the PT exercises that were designed
to help him regain his lost motor skills and muscle coordination.  However,
for the last week, Rodie had refused to do those things while complaining
that he did not feel good.  Therefore, Jim sat there drinking his coffee,
as he brooded over the last couple of weeks events.  He was just starting
on his 4th cup of coffee when he felt Rodie call him.

	"Good morning my love, do you feel any better today?"  Jim thought
to him while sensing the dark cloud that was hovering over Rodie.

	"Not really Jim, I just want to go to sleep is all."  Rodie thought
back to him.

	Jim sat up in his recliner when Rodie said this to him.  There was
something wrong with how Rodie said it, and that now had Jim's attention.
He hobbled over to his jacket to get his cell phone.  He took it out and
started paging through the saved numbers until he reached Cathy's cell
number.

	"What is wrong my love, I can tell that something is bothering
you," Jim asked him cautiously.

	"There was, but not for much longer now, and I will sleep the most
perfect dreamless sleep."  Rodie thought back to Jim, only now his thoughts
were jumbled in some places.  Jim tested to see if Rodie was blocking him
out, and he was not so Jim could feel Rodie's awareness slipping away.  Jim
reached out to Rodie, and in a moment, he found out why Rodie was like
this.

	"No Rodie, don't do this, I promise you that things will improve
and you will get better my love."  Jim thought to him while putting every
ounce of his own soul into his plea to Rodie, as he pressed the rocket dial
button on his cell while his tears flowed down his face.

	"I can't do it anymore Jim.  Please forgive me because I never
wanted to hurt you.  I just wanted to feel your touch one last time, and to
tell you this.  I love forever Jim, goodbye."  Rodie said to him, and then
his awareness was gone because he shut Jim out.  Jim listened to the
ringing in the cell phone as Cathy's number range once, twice, then a third
time before she picked up.

	"Cathy, where are you right now?"  Jim asked her while almost
shouting into the phone.

	"I just went to get some coffee is all, I'm walking through the
doors right now^ÅWhy?"  She asked him in a questioning tone that had a
slight edge of worry in it.

	"I don't know where the hell he got them from, but Rodie just took
a fistful of painkiller pills, and he told me he was going to sleep and
then told me goodbye.  Now Run!  Don't let him go like this please," Jim
practically sobbed into the phone.  However, Cathy was way ahead of him,
and once she heard that Rodie was trying to kill himself, she dropped
everything she was holding, sprinted through the entrance, and down the
main hall towards the stairs closest to Rodie's room.  As she came around
the corner to the nurse's station, she slid to a halt.

	"Nell, Rodie has taken an overdose of something just a few minutes
ago, Jim just called and told me."  Cathy said to Nell Rodgers who
immediately called out for the other nurses to call a code and to page
Mike.  A few moments later Cathy burst into Rodie's Room with Nell right
behind her.  Rodie was in his bed retching, and Nell could see the Morphine
Sulfate pills that he was vomiting.  Just by that glance, she could see at
least two dozen pills so she knew that Rodie had just taken a massive
overdose.

	"Cathy, help me roll him onto his side, then hold him still."  She
said to Cathy as they reached Rodie's bed.  Cathy did as Nell had told her
to do, and as she held Rodie down, Nell had pulled on a latex glove and she
stuck her first and second fingers into Rodie's mouth and down his throat.
Rodie threw up repeatedly as the undigested and partially digested pills
were regurgitated because of Nell's actions.  Cathy could see fifty or more
pills after Nell had done this several times.  Nell then inserted a large
tube down Rodie's throat into his stomach while being very careful not to
damage his recently repaired vocal cords.  At that moment, Mike rushed into
the room followed by two more nurses.  Mike took charge and had Rodie's
stomach pumped before he had charcoal pumped into Rodie's stomach through
the tube to absorb any of the medicine that remained.  He tried to get
Rodie to respond to him, but Rodie was barely able to respond.  Mike had an
IV started and gave Rodie a large dose of Narcan to counteract the effects
of the drugs that had already been absorbed by the body.  It took almost an
hour and a half to stabilize Rodie, and for the Narcan to work.  As soon as
Rodie opened his eyes, he started to cry while trying to tell his worried
mother he was sorry.  Once he was awake again, Mike continued to monitor
Rodie's condition.

	"It is ok honey, I am just glad that you are all right now.  Why
Rodie?  Why do you want to die?  And where did you get the medicine from?"
Cathy asked him as she stared into his eyes while wiping away his tears.
Then Rodie spoke to her loud enough for Mike and Nell to hear also, and he
tried to explain as he hiccupped and sobbed.

	"Because it would be over then m^Åmommy.  Y^ÅYou all t^Åtold me
that I wo^Åwould get better, b^Åbut I'm n^Ånot.  It h^Åhurts s^Åso bad
al^Åall the time, and I^ÅI just wa^Åwant the pa^Åpain to stop," he
spluttered before just softly sobbing into her chest as she held him.  Just
then, Cathy heard Jim's voice out near the nurse's station, and he sounded
very irate.

	"I don't give a flying fuck about your damn procedures!  You can
ticket me or arrest me after I'm finished here, now move the fuck out of my
way before I rip your arm off and beat you to death with it."  Jim bellowed
at the rookie cop who was trying to arrest him for speeding and failure to
stop as well as eluding.  When Mike heard Jim shouting he came out to see
what was going on and hurried over to diffuse the situation.

	"Officer Johnson, I will handle things here now.  File your report
with Sheriff Shymansky, and he will make sure that any violations are taken
care of.  Mr. Chavez was responding to my call about an emergency here, and
I accept full responsibility for any and all laws broken."  Mike told the
young officer, who looked at him and appeared to protest before he changed
his mind.

	"Um, yes sir.  It is just that^Å," the officer began when Mike
interrupted him.

	"Just what?"  Mike asked him.

	"It is just that I clocked him doing well over 140mph.  I did not
know that a BMW could go that fast."  He said in an unsure voice while
hesitating for a moment then looking down at his shoes.  Jim excused
himself and hurried into Rodie's room while Mike took care of the officer
outside.  Whatever Mike told the rookie Deputy, he knew that Sheriff
Shymansky would forgive him for intervening.  Mike just knew that Jim was
about to pop his cork, and probably do exactly as he had threatened to do
to the rookie Sheriff's deputy, so that is why he stepped in to calm the
situation down.

	"That is quite a car that he owns though, me and you both would
have to work a decade just to afford the down payment."  Mike told him as
he slowly walked him back to the elevator.

	"Well now, I have to continue my patrol, Dr. Wise.  I will give my
uncle your regards, and you also have my thanks from me for getting this
job."  The deputy told him.  Mike then realized that the officer was
Sheriff Shymansky's nephew.  Mike told him that he had his own rounds to
make just as the elevator door opened.  Mike then went back to check on
Rodie.

	Jim had come in once Mike distracted the officer, and he came and
stood beside Rodie.  As soon as Rodie saw him he started to cry and
apologize again, but Jim just shushed him.  Jim already knew why Rodie had
done this.  He also knew that they needed help, that he knew where he
needed to go to find the person to help Rodie.

	"It is ok my love, you did the same thing that I did many years ago
when I was in such unbearable pain.  Then I met someone who helped me by
teaching me how to handle my pain, or how to block it so that it does not
cause you to be so depressed like you are now.  I know you feel hopelessly
trapped in your constant cycle of pain, but I promised you that I would
help you, and I am.  Therefore, I want your promise that you will not do
anything else to try to hurt yourself.  I will be gone for a week or two,
but once I return, your life with change for the better my love and the
pain will stop."  Jim told Rodie as he kissed away his tears.  He then had
Rodie promise him not to try to hurt himself again, and he promised he
would not.  Jim kissed him once more before standing up again, but Cathy
asked him to wait for her.  She then followed him out of the room while
Mike told Rodie that he was giving him a pain shot.  Once outside of the
room Cathy looked at Jim for a moment.

	"What did I miss here Jim?  Am I doing something wrong that caused
this?"  She asked him in a choked voice.

	"No, Cathy, you have not missed anything except the fact that you
cannot help him even though you want to help.  I had to endure the same
thing after my accident.  Only I was an adult while Rodie is just a child.
The pain and depression I had after my accident caused me to do the same
thing Rodie just did.  However, remember how I was not that surprised when
you told me about his talents?"  Jim asked her, and Cathy told him yes,
that she remembered.

	"Well, as I said, the pain was so bad that I tried to kill myself.
Then I met this person and she guided me through my crisis and changed my
life, and that is where I am going now, and I know she will restore his
will to live just as she restored mine.  She is deaf and mute, but she
communicated with me exactly as Rodie had been doing before his vocal cords
were repaired.  He is my life, and I cannot let him suffer as I did, not
when I can help him.  So please Cathy, for me, just keep him safe from
hurting himself until I return," Jim almost pleaded with her.  Cathy did
not know what Jim was going to do, but she promised to keep Rodie from
harming himself.  Jim then kissed her on the cheek before he turned and
left.


  ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Mikki -- 10 days later:


	Rodie was sitting up while Cathy fed him spoonfuls of ice cream.
Dr. Mike had started giving Rodie shots for his pain instead of the pills
since Rodie had overdosed on purpose.  He was also giving him Zoloft to
help with his depression, but he was still helpless and in constant pain.
He had been trying to endure his pain, but he was exhausted from having to
constantly face it, and try to do as the physical therapists told him to
do.  No matter what he did though, the constant pain had only worsened
while his mobility and muscle control did not get better.  Most of all
though was the fact that he missed and longed for Jim, and he wanted to go
home.  Since his attempted suicide, his mother had made sure that someone
was with him all the time now.  While this was ok with him, he wished that
they would just let him be by himself for a little while so he could cry
without causing them to worry.  His mother fed him the last of the ice
cream, wiped his face gently, and she stood up and carried his lunch tray
out to the cart by the nurse's station.

      He closed his eyes and tried to relax a bit when he sensed someone
coming into his room.  He had not heard anyone enter the room though so he
opened his eyes and turned his head what little he could to see who had
come in.  This had only caused him to wince as pain went shooting through
his neck and shoulders.  His eyes filled with tears blurring out his vision
and preventing him from seeing anything.  Then he heard her in his mind
before the small hand gently caressed his face brushing away his tears.
When his vision cleared, there was a very small older woman who was not
much taller than he was.  She had blue gray colored hair that was as long
as his used to be.  Most of all, it was her eyes, which were like his own,
only hers were hazel and sky blue in color.  When Rodie looked into her
eyes, his troubles and worries seemed to vanish.

      "Who are you?"  Rodie asked her aloud in his soft voice.  Since his
surgery four months ago to repair his vocal cords, he was able to talk
again but his voice was scarcely louder than a hoarse whisper.  The doctor
had told him than in time that it would gradually improve but he was not
supposed to stress them at all.  That meant he could not talk very loud,
cry out, yell, or sing which was fine with him since he tended to squeak
when he sang.  When the small woman answered him, Rodie did not see her
lips move at all yet he heard her musical voice in his mind.

      "Hello my littlest one, I am Mikki, and my dearest one said that you
needed me so I came."  She said to him as she smiled at him while gently
brushing his stubborn lock of hair out of his face.  Rodie just stared into
her eyes for a moment before his bottom lip began to tremble while his eyes
filled once more before spilling down his face.

      "You are like me aren't you?"  He thought to her, and she nodded her
head.

      "And Jim sent you?"  He asked and she nodded her head again as she
continued to smile at him.  She then let the smile fade from her face and
gave him a questioning look.

      "Yes he did, and he is my dearest one of all who I have helped.  May
I, my littlest one?"  She asked him, and Rodie nodded his head slightly as
he dropped his defenses allowing her to commune with him in a way that was
only possible for them.  She placed both of her hands on the sides of his
face and closed her eyes for a couple of minutes.  Rodie watched as her
eyes filled and tears slip down her face as he revealed all of his pain to
her.  When she opened her eyes again, her face became kind and gentle again
as she looked at him.

      "Oh my littlest one, now I know all of the pain you had to endure,
and I promise you that from this day on that you will never have to endure
this pain again.  I have helped many people to use and understand their
gifts.  Everybody has their own gifts, and some like you, are the most
gifted ones of them all.  Most of the people I have helped learned very
early to mask or hide their gifts, but your gift cannot be hidden, and that
has caused you so much pain in your life.  That is because people do not
understand your talents, instead they fear you, and try to destroy you.
That is why you have suffered so much in your brief life my littlest one,
but no more.  I will show you how to use your gift, and how to prevent
others from hurting you again.  In order to do this, I have to take you
away from here, but I promise that everything you have lost you will
regain.  The pain you feel now is not purely physical because it is from
the wounds you have suffered emotionally.  Once we have healed those
wounds, your physical wounds will heal also, and you will regain that which
you have lost."  She explained to him gently.  Mikki then took his hands
and placed them palms down on the sides of her face inviting him to do as
she had done.

      Rodie could sense that her talents were almost identical to his own,
and when she invited him to seek answers to all of his questions, he did
so.  He scanned her memories, and saw how she had also suffered because of
her talents.  He realized that she did understand his pain and knew that
she would help heal him in a way nobody ever could.  As they communed, he
made his decision and gave his trust to her, and placed his future into her
hands.  Mikki returned his trust with her own trust, compassion, and love.
As Rodie felt her trust and love encompass him in warmth, he wept for the
first time in his life and became what he truly was.  Just Rodie, an
extraordinarily gifted boy of 10, who had been exposed to everyone's
thoughts and emotions from the day he was born.  A child who had been
thrust into the unforgiving adult world to fend for himself without anyone
to guide him, and now he finally found his guide.  He let his heart pour
out to her in gratitude and love while knowing that Jim had saved him once
more.

      Mikki just held Rodie for a long time while he cleansed some of his
emotional wounds, and when his weeping had tapered off, she could feel his
physical discomfort he was in at that moment.  She laid him back against
his pillows and placed her hand on his temple.

      "Sleep my littlest one, just relax, and sleep with no pain my
littlest one."  She said to him as she leaned over and kissed him on his
forehead.  Rodie relaxed, and slipped deep into sleep as she said, and he
felt no pain.  Once he was sleeping peacefully, she got up and quietly left
the room.  Out in the hall just outside the ward where Rodie was in, all of
the others were waiting for Mikki to come out.  When she did come out, Jim
was the one who greeted her by kissing her on her forehead.  He then showed
her to the small lounge used by the doctors here at the hospital.  Mike had
arranged it so they could meet there with her.

      "It has been a long time little mother, I should have come to you
sooner with our wounded bird and maybe have spared him this suffering.
Come and sit down, and we can talk as to what needs to be done to heal
Rodie.  Everyone, this is Mikki and she is someone who helped me to heal my
wounds after Byron had died.  After I had spoken to you Mike about why
Rodie was not recovering, and you said that there was nothing to indicate a
problem medically that would explain why.  Therefore, I knew then that his
wounds were of the soul, and not just of the body.  The only person I knew
of who has healed those kinds of wounds is my little mother, Mikki.  Eddie
can tell you about the time I left the Navy, and that he thought I was
going off to die, and I was but I found Mikki instead.  In the six months I
stayed with her, not only did I learn much from her, she also healed the
empty rift inside me after Byron died.  That is why I went and asked her to
come and do what we have been unable to do so far.  Mikki communicates in
the same way as Rodie because she is deaf, and mute, but do not worry
because she picks the thoughts out of your mind as you speak to her.  Now
before we start, does anyone have any questions for her, also she would
like to get acquainted with each of you."  Jim told them after he pulled
out a chair so she could sit.

      Once Mikki was seated, each of them came up and stood in front of her
as she held their hands.  Everyone in Rodie's extended family was there
except the twins who were in school.  Eric and Mark were home schooled so
they were here with them instead of being with the twins right now.
Dennis, Chiari, and John's mother were also there because Rodie had
included them in his family also.  The last ones to greet Mikki were Mark
and Eric.  Eric went first before Mark.  As Mikki took his hands, she could
sense his special bond that Rodie had given him, just as he had given to
them all.  However, Mikki saw something else too so she asked him a few
questions while letting everyone else hear her.

      "So you are Rodie's best friend Eric?"  She asked him.

      "Yeah, um, I mean yes ma'am.  Rodie is my first and only best friend
in the whole world, and I want him to get better so he can come home."
Eric told her as he blushed.

      "We all want that my little one, but there is more, isn't there my
little one.  Why do you want him to come home?"  She asked him gently to
coax him into answering.

      "Well, because I love him."  Eric said while he blushed a little
deeper this time.

      "I know you do little one, and do not be embarrassed for telling the
truth.  Now one last question before you go, why do you love Rodie?"  Mikki
asked him while her face projected a gently kindness to him.  Eric stood
there for a long moment as he thought about her question.  He then looked
over at his father, then over to Mark before looking back at Mikki.

      "I love Rodie because I want more than anything for him to be my
brother then we will always be together that way."  He told her as tears
began to well up in his eyes as he revealed his most secret wish to Mikki.
Mikki smiled warmly at him as she pulled him into her arms.  She hugged him
and kissed him on his cheek.

      "I can now see why Rodie loves you so much, my little one.  Now I
need to ask you a favor, will you help me to heal my littlest one Eric?"
She asked him as he stood up again and wiped his eyes.

      "I would do anything to help Rodie get well," Eric said to her.

      "I am glad to know you would, because I will need your help in
healing my littlest one."  She told him while smiling at him.  Eric beamed
brightly at her and hugged her once more before going to sit by his father.
Mark came up to her then with a very mixed expression on his face.  Mikki
took his hands and just looked at him for a moment.

      "And you are my littlest one's first love, but you are torn because
of him, why is that dear one?"  Mikki asked Mark with a compassionate
expression.  Mark looked at her just for a moment before his tears started
to flow also.  Finally, he just sank to his knees while bowing his head and
weeping.

      "What am I supposed to do now?  I love him so much, but I love them
also.  Whatever I do, it is going to hurt someone I care about the most."
He said as Mikki quickly embraced him and started gently rocking him as he
cried.  They all heard her as she comforted him.

      "It is alright my dear one, I know why you are so torn now, and your
love for Rodie is unlike any other love you have felt towards another
person.  Yet, your love for your father and Cathy has created this rift
between your love for Rodie and them.  This rift is deep, and only you and
Rodie, your father, and Cathy can heal this rift.  I will need all of you
also to make my littlest one whole again, and to make my dear one here
whole again as well."  Mikki told them all as she continued to cradle Mark
in her arms while rocking him back and forth.  Mark had just bared his
tattered soul to them about his love for Rodie, and his love for John and
Cathy to get married, and his desire to have a mother again.  John and
Cathy were also weeping now after seeing how this had been destroying Mark
while they worried about Rodie.  Mark truly loved Rodie, as well as loving
them and wanting them to be together.  This had caused this huge rip in his
soul as he struggled to choose between them.  They had seen Mark withdraw
inward a little more each day, and they had assumed that this was because
of Rodie's exceedingly slow recovery.

      "It is ok my dear one, and we will solve this dilemma as it should be
done, as a family.  We are all going to have to do our parts to ensure that
my littlest one, and you, my dear one, are healed.  And you too my dearest
one, we have to heal the rift inside of you also."  Mikki told Jim as she
gently wiped Mark's tear streaked face with a handkerchief.

      "I know little mother, that is why it took me so long to come to
you."  Jim said to her as she helped Mark up and gently guided him to the
chair next to hers.  Once seated, and after Mark had regained his composure
somewhat, although it was clear that he was hurting from these huge wounds.
Jim looked around the table at all of them before he stood up and limped
around a bit as he worked out the cramps in his legs.

      "Ok, now all of you can see why I asked my little mother to come help
us.  I think we have made a big enough mess when it comes to Mark, Eric,
Rodie, and myself included.  However, I think my little mother will agree
that my hurts cannot be healed by anyone except Rodie himself, but that is
something we can deal with after he gets well.  What we need to do now is
to do as Mikki says and work together from now on.  No decision concerning
Mark, Eric or Rodie will be made without having everyone who is here now
giving their own thoughts on the matter.  Cathy and John do not blame
yourselves for the damage caused to Mark.  We were all responsible for that
because we all encouraged Mark to be with Rodie, just as we encouraged you
and John to get together, so we all are to blame.  No offense boys, but I
am not including you in the blame because a mess like this only adults can
create."  Jim told Mark and Eric, and they both smiled at him.

      "Now I have not forgotten all that you taught me little mother, but
if I make a mistake just let me know and we can fix it.  Now the reason I
sought Mikki's help is obvious.  She can just touch a person and see their
soul, and she knows from experience on how to repair the tears she sees.  I
know you all will come to love her as I do.  Our main priority right now is
Rodie, Mark, and Eric's well being first.  I hate to say it Mike, but Rodie
has been here for several months and he has only regained minimal movement.
While becoming severely depressed because of him wanting to go home and be
with us.  That is because in order for him to recover, he needs all of us
around him so he can draw a little strength from each of us.  He does not
need all of us constantly, only the ones closest to him while you others
can come and visit.  I have made arraignments for Cathy, John, Eddie,
Marco, Mark, Eric, Mike, Mikki, and me to leave here tomorrow with Rodie
and we will be going to a secluded estate near Savannah, Georgia that has
everything we need to help the boys recover.  Chiari, Both Eddie, Marco,
and I need you to take care of all our business matters while we are gone.
Eddie will fill you in on the details for Marco's school, and you already
know how to handle my affairs while Dennis can take care of the restaurant
and Eddie's affairs.  Lillian, I was hoping that you could look after our
homes for us as well as supervise the completion of the renovations to my
house.  I have setup an expense account to cover anything you will need,
and I have instructed a local company to provide a driver/assistant to you.
John can answer all of your questions, and he has all of the keys and
security codes.  Mike, you already said that you had Nell make arraignments
for your practice for however long we are gone.  So did I forget anything?"
Jim asked them and Eric shyly raised his hand.

      "Yes, Eric?  What did you want to say?"  Jim asked him as he smiled
at Eric making him blush.

      "Um, what about Brutis?  He can't stay home by himself, so can he
come with us, please?"  Eric asked innocently.

      "Yes, the hairy beast is coming with us.  Even if I tried to leave
him, he would follow.  We discovered that when we accidentally locked him
in the garage.  He chewed through the wall, didn't he Marco?"  Jim said to
Marco before looking back at Eric who was doing his best not to laugh
without much success.

      "Alright, does anyone have anything else?  Did I forget anything
little mother?"  Jim asked Mikki.

      "No my dearest one, you have covered it all," she said to him with an
affectionate expression.  It was clear that their relationship was much
more complicated than it appeared sometimes.  For one thing, Jim never
submitted to anyone, yet he did so willingly with Mikki.  Another thing was
the clearly visible love that Jim had for this woman.

      "Alright everyone, we have a lot of work to do so we better get
started.  When we all get home you will find compete sets of luggage for
each of you, and I want you to stuff them as full as you can manage.  Mark,
that does not mean you get to pack Eric in one also."  Jim told him with a
smirk, and Mark did his best to look disappointed while Eric clearly showed
his dislike for Jim's decision by sticking his tongue out at Jim.

      "I love you too, Spritemite.  I also have a chest for your toys that
you want to bring with you.  So bring the things you believe that you and
Rodie would like the most.  Tomorrow I have some people coming by to
collect them so we need to have them packed and ready to go by 10 am ok."
Jim told him as he bent down at the waist beside Eric while not bending his
knees.

      "I will Jim.  Rodie and me, we like the same kind of games and stuff,
so I'll have it ready.  Oh and I love you more."  Eric told him before
sticking out his tongue and waggling it at Jim, who laughed as Eric broke
into giggles.  Now that they all knew what to do Cathy was going to
volunteer to stay with Rodie, but Mikki told her that she would stay since
all of her things were already at where they were going.  Then John offered
to drive Cathy home as everybody got up to leave.  Jim told Eric to ride
with him, while Marco waited with Mark until everyone had left the room.
He then came over and sat next to Mark, and he could still see how he was
hurting.

      "You want to talk about it my friend?"  Marco asked him softly.  Mark
looked at Marco before turning and hugging him as fresh tears ran down his
face.  Marco just held him while stroking his back.

      "I'm just so confused Marco, I didn't know that it would be a problem
until I woke up in the room and thought Cathy was my mom.  Since then,
everything has been tearing me apart.  Now if I choose to love Rodie, then
I hurt Cathy and dad, but if I choose to let them be together then it will
be Rodie I hurt the most and I will lose him.  The worst part is that I
want them both because I do miss having a mother and my dad deserves to be
happy again.  Cathy makes him happy, and I know Rodie would love him just
as much as we love Cathy.  However, if they get married I lose Rodie
because he will be my brother then, and everyone will think we are some
kind of freaks because we love each other.  I love all of them too much to
hurt any one of them, but its killing me because no matter what I do I have
to sacrifice one of them in order to get the other."  Mark sobbed as he
cried into Marco's shoulder.

      "It is simple for the time being Mark, just don't choose anything
right now, and don't worry about it.  You will not have to make that choice
until either Rodie, or your dad and Cathy makes their own choice.  You have
plenty of time, and with all of us knowing now, we will all help each other
so that we make the best choice for all of us.  Think of this for a moment,
who says that your dad has to marry Cathy in order for them to be together
or live together?  They can just wait until both you and Rodie are grown
before getting married, and by then it will not matter about you and Rodie
being together.  So stop tearing yourself apart like this, and when you get
into a jam like this, come talk to me, or someone, and we will help.
Although, I think I know why you chose not to say anything, so tell me if I
am wrong.  The part you chose not to reveal is the conflict you have
between Rodie's choice between you and Jim."  Marco whispered to him and
Mark cried a little harder as he nodded and revealed his deepest secret.

      "Again my friend, this is something you do not have to worry about.
Believe me on this.  No matter what you and Rodie do, it will never change
his relationship with Jim.  Rodie chose Jim long before he ever knew you,
and they will always be together no matter what.  Remember, Jim loves you
just as much as he loves Eric, but his love for Rodie is something you just
cannot understand yet.  Jim has only had one true love in his life, and
that love died over twenty years ago.  Now Rodie has come into his life and
filled the hole in Jim's heart that was left when Byron died.  Then you
came into both of their lives, and now Jim has his own choice to make.
That choice has put a burden upon his soul just like your own has done to
you.  Therefore, you see now that you are not the only one who has this
problem because we all do in one way or another."

      "You should remember this too, Jim chose to be intimate with you
while putting Rodie off.  There was more than just his worry about
physically hurting Rodie when he did that, but it is for him to tell you
and not me.  For right now though, the both of you can share Jim because he
loves you both equally, but if you try to force him or Rodie into making a
choice between you or the other, then I will tell you that they would
choose each other.  Why is this true?  Because Rodie chose Jim almost a
year ago, and he only made his choice to have you as his partner after he
woke up.  Jim was the first and only person to love Rodie for who he was,
and not because of what he could do before you came into Rodie's life.  He
taught Rodie how to love himself again, and that is what allowed Rodie to
love you.  Now are you sure that this pain you are feeling is from Rodie
loving Jim, or from you not being willing to share Rodie with Jim later if
it comes to intimacy between them?"  Marco asked him softly, and it was
almost as if he had slapped Mark in the face because his tears stopped
after being stunned into silence.  After thinking for almost five minutes
about what Marco suggested, what little hope he had found evaporated, and
his face fell back into the pain once more.

      "No, it isn't that Marco.  I do not have any problem with Jim and
Rodie being together like that.  What has happened between Rodie and me is
different, and I don't know what is wrong.  Rodie started pulling away from
me right after his nightmares began.  Last month, he even told me to go
love someone else because loving him was not worth the risk.  I tried to
talk to him about it, and he shut me out then and has ever since.  He just
said that he has chosen Jim over me and for me to get used to it.  He has
refused to speak to me since then.  He doesn't even say hi to me anymore,
and I don't know what I did to make him hate me so much."  Mark told him as
he relaxed in Marco's embrace.

      "That one I can tell you about, because you forget that I have my own
talents.  Only I can sense a person's emotions, and know if they are
telling me the truth or hiding something.  The reason Rodie is rejecting
you Mark, is to protect you from himself.  Rodie believes that the only
reason you were hurt when his father came that night was that you love him.
He believes that who ever loves him will come to harm because he is cursed,
so he has chosen to reject you in order to save you from the pain and grief
he believes that he has caused.  Mark, believe me when I say to you that it
hurts him more when he has to reject you, even more than it hurts for you
to hear his rejection.  Rodie is just as confused as you are right now, and
he is in the same emotional turmoil you are in also.  Just do not take him
seriously when he tells you these things.  Remember, his gift to you will
now enable you to sense these things from him also."  Marco told him and
Mark relaxed even more as his uncertainty about this was lifted.

      "Look, everything that Jim told us was the truth, because we are all
killing Rodie ourselves.  Our fears, insecurities, and pain are Rodie's
also, along with his own fears and pain as well.  That is why he is unable
to get well right now because he has no way of protecting himself from
everything we experience, and all of this is just draining his spirit and
energy out of him.  We were the first ones he reached out to, to pull him
back from the abyss he had fallen into, and we did pull him back.  Now he
is falling again because of his belief that loving him will cause us harm,
and we all need to reach out and catch him again, and as many times it may
require in order for Rodie to recover.  That is what true love is about
Mark.  Now Rodie is counting on you, Jim, and Eric the most to help him do
this because you three are the ones who love him the most.  Now I know this
sounds stupid, but you have to forget what Rodie says when he tries to push
you away, and trust what your dick, as well as your heart, is telling you
instead.  Rodie needs you; Eric, and Jim, as well as the rest of us, so
push all these other things aside for now, and let us worry about them once
he is better."  Marco told him, and when the word "dick" was mentioned it
had sent Mark into giggles of laughter.  Mark agreed with him, but he
stopped Marco from getting up.  Mark just leaned over and kissed him softly
on the lips before hugging him tightly.

      "Thank you for being my friend Marco, I love you for that."

      "I love you also, and I always have Mark.  Nothing will ever change
that fact, now why don't we go because we have a lot of work to do."  He
told Mark as he stood and held out his hand to him.  Mark took his hand and
let Marco pull him to his feet.  He quickly wiped his face with his shirt
before they left to join the others.


End of Chapter 3.

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