Date: Mon, 02 Oct 2006 17:26:06 +1000
From: evilstewie@hushmail.com
Subject: The Swimming Pool, the Boy and Me pt 4

The Swimming Pool, The Boy and Me pt 4

The disclaimer!!!

These writings are a work of fiction, the adult and boy exist only in the
imagination of the author.  Consensual, sexual acts between an adult and a
minor do occur and, therefore, if it is against the law of your country
don't precede any further.  Of course, if you like a bit of titillation
then....read on.

  I lay on my front, naked with his sweaty body over me.  His huge cock
pulverised my anal passage as I bit hard on the pillow in front of me.  It
hurt like hell but I liked the pain - I needed the pain.  The slapping of
his balls became more furious as his cum began to spurt into the deepest
recesses of my body and then he stopped and lay on me whilst his penis
turned flaccid inside me.  He kissed my neck and I slowly turned around to
face him and kissed my boyfriend deeply on the lips.
  We'd been with each other for a year and living together for 6 months.  I
liked him enough, loved him on some level, too but ever since meeting him I
hadn't taken myself away from the internet and my peado friends and
pictures of naked boys we shared.  What was missing was sexual connection:
He just didn't do it for me, bizarrely though I was more fond of 2inch
cocks, I enjoyed the pain of him fucking me with his 11 incher.  On some
level I felt that the pain I received from him was payback for the double
life I lead - though, of course, he was clueless about it being painful or
my love for young boys.  Sex wasn't fun with him.  It wasn't what I had
with Steve.  If Leigh knew about Steve, if Leigh knew I was seeing anyone,
let alone an 8yo boy behind his back......well, I don't think I need to
explain.  Steve made me cum twice in 10minutes the last time I'd been with
him - Leigh never made me cum once without it taking me having to think
about fucking someone like Steve.  With Steve I enjoyed sex for all the
right reasons, it was just bad luck that it was with entirely the wrong
person.
  I hadn't cum yet and Leigh began to go down on me, sucking my dick in a
way that now felt second rate compared to Steve.  I began to think of Steve
and my time with him and slowly began to imagine that Leigh was Steve and
that his mouth was that of an 8yo old boys.  I began to face fuck Leigh
much as I had done with Steve.
   "Hey, Dan - what you fucking doing?"  Leigh shouted as he pulled away
from my cock.  "You're fucking gagging me".  (Remember, Joe was the fake
name I'd given Steve)
  "Quit complaining," I joked "or else I'll find someone else to deep
throat me"
  "As if", he replied as he continued to suck me off.
  Not 'as if', I thought to myself.  I'd found someone who could not only
deep throat me but that also didn't complain when I wanted it done my way.
As my boyfriend sucked me off, I began to think that the possibilities
could be endless with Steve as long as he enjoyed it.  I could try tying
him up, smacking him, trying scat and piss with him.....my fantasies became
more wild the closer to cumming I became.  Suddenly as I thought of licking
Steve's very dirty arsehole, I came in Leigh's mouth.  It wasn't the
greatest cum in the world, after all I had shot my load twice already today
in Steve's perfect, boy mouth.
  "Have you wanked a lot today or something?" Leigh asked me?
  "Something like that" I replied.
  That night and for the next few days my thoughts and feelings were much
the same: they were a mixture of Steve, sex, fear of being caught but most
of all the infinite possibilities of what we may do together.  Being with
Steve had meant that my urge and need for dangerous sex had increased and I
found myself exploring public toilets in search a new sexual high with
strange men and teenagers exploring their sexual identities.  The thing is
I wanted Steve, I didn't want pubic hair or cum and the threat of STD.  I
wanted Steve who I knew was clean and lapped up my every instruction when
it came to sex.  We'd met on the Saturday, seen each other on the Monday
and my next visit would be the following Saturday - two weeks to the day we
first met.  His parents were around too much and I simply couldn't get out
of work.  But on the Saturday we'd arranged, his parents would be on
another business trip and so I'd meet Steve after swimming.  Though I would
have preferred Steve smelling like a boy rather then the chlorinated pool,
it was still a date I was looking for.  My only problem was Leigh who
himself usually worked on Saturday but was threatening to take this one off
so that him and I could go into the country.
  Again, my only real solace was the Internet and chat rooms where I could
meet others like me who had an attraction to boys that society found
unnatural.  Though I'd spoken to guys like these often, now that I'd
actually become one, I could more easily differentiate between those that
had actually crossed the line and those that were only lying in order to
get their kicks.  What had always been clear to me was that what society
called child abuse and others called boylove was extremely rife and I spoke
to many men about their relationships with children: uncles with nephews,
teachers with students, fathers with sons, older brothers with younger
brothers, neighbours who were babysitting.  Though everyone's stories were
different, there was one thing that bound them all.....none of these men
hurt boys, they just opened their eyes up to new possibilities just like I
was doing with Steve.
  What also struck me though was that adults had taught many of these men
their ways when they were children - a circle had been formed.  Though no
physical harm was being committed, what of the emotional harm being struck
upon these boys by men like me?  As I thought about it some more I began to
feel sick and question as to why I'd started down this road.  I'd never
been abused or assaulted by an adult as a child, so what was it in me that
made me want to do the same to a child?  Was it genetic, much like the fact
I was homosexual?  Or was I just a screw up?  However much I kept telling
myself I wasn't hurting Steve, I kept on coming back to the same thing: he
was 8 and had no idea about lust or passion.  When our bodies became
intertwined with each other, he was merely following my instruction.  Was
Steve gay?  At what age do you know you're gay?  Steve had come onto me in
the shower, not the other way around.  At his age I knew I was different,
but gay?  I only knew I liked men and not girls and that I had no idea what
that meant.  If I could go back in time knowing what I know now, I would
gladly give myself to an older man as an 8yo, 7yo.....even if I were a 4 or
5yo.  To me, Steve was the same.  He knew he was different, he just hadn't
worked out how yet and as long as no one found out about us then it was
obvious - I should keep seeing him because I was not only feeding his
fascination, but mine too.  I decided to also no longer deceive myself with
the thought that Steve was getting as much enjoyment out of this as I was.
Continuing down this path with Steve, whether we were caught or not, would
only lead him to one day question his whole life and that this knowledge
would either tear him apart or have him committing his own crimes.
  I spoke in depth with my on line friend about all of my feelings and he
eventually revealed to me that he'd been with 2 boys under 10yo.  I was
completely shocked and annoyed that he'd lied to me and been so angry with
me the day before.  As we continued to talk though, he told me that he
couldn't in all good conscience say what a wonderful person I was.  To goad
me on with my sexual acts would have been the wrong thing to do - it would
be the wrong thing for anyone to do.  He agreed with me that we should not
delude ourselves that we were doing something that the other boy wanted:
although they may be attracted to boys (even men), they were certainly not
ready to appreciate sexual acts in the way that we were.  For this reason,
any act that occurred was purely for our own gratification.  Our
conversation soon turned to sexual intercourse and my thoughts were firmly
set on Saturday......

If you have any comments (good or bad) then email me at
evilstewie@hushmail.com