Date: Tue, 31 May 2011 16:41:20 -0400
From: Johnny Smith <johnnytsmith96@gmail.com>
Subject: The Birds and the Bees Part 1

This story is completely fictional. Names, characters and incidents are a
product of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to real people or
incidents is completely coincidental.

This story contains descriptions of sexual interactions. If you are
uncomfortable reading such material, or are not permitted to do so legally,
please leave this page immediately. Please read at your own risk.

Dear Me,

I am writing this letter to myself because I have to get this off chest but
I can?t tell ANYONE.  Last summer was the most unbelievable, sad and
wonderful summer I ever had.  Please Mom if you are reading this, PUT IT
DOWN!  You do not want to read any further!!

To start, I have to say the year leading up to the summer wasn?t the best.
My parents got a divorce, which was not that bad, I was glad they finally
decided pull the plug after an eternity of bickering and tension.  What
does suck is my mom got a job and we moved out of my house and into an
apartment.  It is the ugliest apartment you can imagine, its miles from my
friends and the building is filled with other single mothers and deadbeat
dads.  I really hate it.  My dad has a girlfriend and I barely see him, my
older brother is a jock and spends all day at practice, and my mom is
usually at work until late.  Needless to say I spent a lot of the last
school year alone.

All the alone time was not that bad because it gave me lots of privacy.  A
while back, when I was still small, I learned that rubbing my penis would
create the most intense feeling, like I was peeing electricity, but nothing
would come out.  After I watched a video about the birds and the bees I
learned that I was masturbating, but I was just too young to cum.  Of
course now all the boys in my class do nothing but talk about jerking off.
I jerk off too, almost every day, sometimes a few times a day, sometime A
LOT, but now there?s always some sticky cum that shoots out.

Another thing the boys talk about constantly is pussy and how they want to
bang this girl or that girl, or a teacher or somebody?s mother!  I talked a
lot about pussy too and imagined what it would be like to have sex with a
girl when I jerked off.  But that wasn?t the only thing I thought about.  I
liked to imagine I would watch another boy have sex with a girl.  A lot of
the time I wondered what it was like to be the girl and have a boy inside
me moving it up and down.  Then one day this thought popped in my head,
what if one of the boys was having sex with me.

The first time I had this thought I put it out of my head right away.  I
knew that fags did this and I was no fag.  But every time I jerked off I
couldn?t help but imagine a classmate on top of me, doing me like he would
do a girl.  I imagined sex with all my classmates.  I imagined what they
looked like naked and what their dicks looked like and felt like.  I even
began to finger myself when I jerked off to get the feeling of a boy inside
of me.

Of course this was a complete secret.  I go to a Christian school and there
are no fags there.  Boys are required to take part in sports and whenever
we are back in the locker room there is more talk of pussy and tits and
blowjobs.  Little did any of the boys know I was watching them undress and
thinking about their naked bodies and cocks when I was at home.

I wasn?t always happy masturbating.  After I would cum I would get
depressed and wonder why I wanted to have sex with a boy instead of a girl.
I looked in the mirror and sometimes I would hate what was looking back at
me.  My hair is blond and very curly and I can never get it to look right.
It sits on top of my head like a birds nest.  My skin is white and never
gets very tan and I always have to wear sunscreen.  I am ?late bloomer? and
when most of my classmates were comparing muscles in the mirror or shaving,
I kept to myself, concealing that I only have modest sprouts of pubic hair
and not a speck of hair anywhere else.  Maybe I was destined to be gay
because I just looked more like a girl.

Thankfully the school year ended and not soon enough.  I finally had
something to look forward to, summer camp!  I have been going to summer
camp every year since I can remember.  It?s up in the mountains and I love
being in the outdoors and away from everything else in my life.

The first day was a like a big a reunion and I knew most of the boys in my
cabin from previous summers.  All of us were bigger and taller than before
and most the boys? voices had changed.  I was still smaller than the other
boys, but for some reason at camp it didn?t matter.  I wasn?t in
competition with these friends the way I was at school.  Immediately the
jokes and pranks started and after a day I forgot about all the anxiety and
loneliness I felt at home.

There were 8 boys in my cabin and two councilors, CJ and Troy.  CJ is a
hippy who is totally into ecology and the environment.  He has a scraggly
beard and wore beads and would talk in barely a whisper.  Our junior
councilor was Troy and he was a long time camper who came back to be a
councilor even though he was in college.  Troy started out like a total
douche bag.  He was obsessed with himself and would spend forever in the
bathroom looking in the mirror.  He always challenged us to little
competitions, like races or pull ups, but he just wanted to prove how
easily he could kick all of our asses.  He was naturally good at all sports
and was the star of any game at camp.  One time he said I put on my chap
stick like it was lipstick and this made me so mad!  He also was obsessed
with his girlfriend who he had a picture of right next to his bed.  She was
a skank who went to his college.

The first weekend of camp we took an overnight camping trip.  Because we
were older campers this overnight was going to be at a state park away from
camp.  We were also going to break down to two groups, 4 boys and 1
councilor per group.  At the park CJ read off the groups, I would be in a
group with Troy as the leader and three other boys, Martin, Jeremy and
Cisco.  I guess the small groups were supposed to help bonding or
something.

The four of us and Troy were off and it was a great hike that went right
along a cliff, and eventually we made it to the campsite.  We set up tents
and Troy said we should take ?showers? in the nearby stream.  This was
normal for an overnight and we grabbed our eco-friendly soap and stripped
down by the streams edge.  The water was ICE COLD but we jumped in anyways
and did our bests to wash in between screams.  Of course I was nervous
about being naked with the other boys especially because I was not as
developed as they were, but like I said there was something different about
camp.  I didn?t mind them seeing me, and they weren?t nervous either.
Besides, it was so cold none of us could think of anything else.  After
splashing around and bathing the four of us sat on some hot rocks with our
towels as our only covering and let the cool mountain air dry us off.
That?s when I saw Troy wade out into the water upstream.  The other boys
were facing the other direction and so I was the only one who saw him.

Troy?s back was to me and the first thing I noticed was his legs.  I don?t
know how I never noticed before.  He was always so annoying.  But his legs
must have been the strongest I?ve ever seen, I can?t describe it.  Not
thick but slender with bulges of hard muscle at the calf and thigh.  His
legs were brown from the sun and covered in dark hair.  I was fascinated by
body hair and always noticed who had it and where it grew.  Troy?s hair
started at his ankles and followed up his legs right up to his butt which
was also covered in dark hair.  I suddenly couldn?t breathe.  Looking at
the hard muscle of his butt and the way it moved with his steps made my
heart beat so loudly that I thought everyone would hear it.  From his butt
I followed the line of his spine up his back and shoulders.  I never knew
the back had so many muscles in it.  Each of Troy?s muscles stood out and
was defined.  I had just been skinny dipping with my cabin mates but never
had I felt paralyzed by the sight of a man?s body.  I was a zombie.  That?s
until Cisco splashed some water on me.

It was cold and shocking, I was pissed, but then he laughed and pointed to
my towel.  My dick was sticking straight up and made a tent out of my
towel.  Cisco called out splashing around, ?Hey horn dog, what are you
thinking about??  Right then Troy heard the splashing and turned around.  I
wanted to splash Cisco back, but I couldn?t move, I had to see Troy?s
front.  Right then he turned and my eyes went straight to his crotch.  At
first I thought he was playing a joke on us, and that he was wearing a fake
penis, but that didn?t make any sense.  The next thought that was in my
head was elephant trunk.  His dick looks like an elephant?s truck.  When I
look at my penis it sticks out sort of diagonally away, but Troy?s hung
straight down like it was too heavy to stick out at all.  Also his balls
were big and I could see each one hanging behind his dick, I had never seen
anything like it.  Not only were his dick and balls humongous, but the dark
hair that had covered his butt and legs was really thick around his front.
He didn?t have any hair on his chest but below the belt he was like a
werewolf.  He yelled at us to settle down and somehow in the commotion my
towel fell in the stream.  I still had a boner that I was trying to conceal
and I knew that Troy could see me. I was so embarrassed I pulled the wet
towel out of the stream and did my best to conceal myself as I ran back to
the campsite.

Back at the campsite all was forgotten and we made dinner around the
campfire.  Like I suspected the small group of four was meant for bonding
and Troy read questions CJ had given him that we were supposed to answer
like, what?s our worst fear and most embarrassing moments.  Of course I
didn?t answer being suspected as gay or having a boner at the stream.  But
like always the conversation eventually turned to sex.  Someone said
something about blowjobs and that?s when Troy had to be his big shot self,
he asked if any of us had ever had a blow job and of course no one did.  He
then went on to say how his girlfriend gives the best blowjob he?s ever
had.  He told us about the technique she uses, how she uses her mouth and
hand at the same time.  I know the other boys were as fascinated as I was.
Just maybe they were intrigued about receiving a blow job and for me, I
wanted to give one.

We doused the campfire and I got up to walk to the boys? tent, but Troy
stopped me.  He told me there was too much goofing around today and
everyone needs to sleep.  He told me I had to sleep in his tent.  I was
pissed off at this.  I knew my friends would be up telling jokes all night
while I had to sleep next to Troy.  Also I was still embarrassed from the
boner incident, but I had to do what I was told.  In his tent, I laid out
my sleeping bag next to his and we exchanged good nights and I thought we
were going to sleep.  That?s when Troy asked what I thought about his blow
job story and I told him I?d like to get one just like it.  Then he said he
thought I?d like to give one.  I went completely silent.  The tent suddenly
felt 1000 degrees.  I couldn?t believe what I heard.  I denied it
completely.  But he said it again, he said he thought I wanted to give a
blow job and then he asked if I had ever given a guy a blow job.
?Absolutely not? I said firmly, because it was true.  But when he asked a
third time if I wanted to, I couldn?t say anything.  The truth is I did
want to, and I wanted it do it to Troy right now.  Next he said that if I
wanted to try it he wouldn?t tell anyone.  It would be our secret.  I
didn?t say anything, but in the silence that followed he grabbed my hand
and brought it into his sleeping bag.  He rested my hand on his big hard
cock.

I didn?t know what to do next, so I just started moving my hand up and down
his cock, which was still under his boxer shorts.  I did this a few times
when he stopped me to pull down his boxers.  When my hand went back I could
feel his whole cock.  It was hot and there was a little bit of sweat on it.
I thought it looked big in the stream, but now, now that it was hard and my
hand was on it, I knew how big it was.  I don?t know measurements very
good, but I know how my penis feels in my hand.  I can wrap my fingers all
the way around my hard dick, but I couldn?t get my fingers around Troy?s.
It was very thick.  Also, my hand covers most of my dick lengthwise when I
jack off, but I barely covered half of Troy?s.  He?s must have been twice
as long as mine.  I jacked his cock like this for a little while nervous
about what to do next when he said it was time to put it in my mouth.

He was on his back and he told me to go and kneel in between his legs,
which I did.  The next part came pretty naturally.  I lifted the heavy dick
off of his stomach so it was straight up and down.  I moved my hand up and
down and watched his foreskin move up and back over the tip which was like
a pointed spear.  My foreskin is tight around the head of my dick, but his
moved loosely.  He told me to slide the skin back and put the head in my
mouth.  I did what I was told and the taste was not bad, but there was
sweet pre-cum on the tip.  It felt soft but hard at the same time.  I
opened my mouth wide and covered my teeth and put his cock as deep in my
mouth as I could, but it was not even half way down.  I had heard about
blow-jobs from all my classmates and I knew that it felt good to have a
?deep throat? but every time I tried to get his dick further into my mouth
I gagged.  Troy told me to relax and that I shouldn?t rush it.  He told me
to suck on each of his balls which I did even though they were hairy.  He
showed me how to use my tongue on his different parts and how it made him
feel good.  We did this for a while and although I was nervous about
pleasing him I didn?t feel bad about doing it.  I loved it.  I would take
breaks from having his cock in my mouth and I would just feel his body.  I
sat in between his legs and with my hands would explore his hairy legs,
moving my hand up and down over the muscles.  I felt every inch of his long
thick cock and balls.  I even slid my hand under him and felt his hairy
butt.

Eventually he got me to use both my hands and my mouth around his cock at
the same time.  It wasn?t easy, but he really liked when I did this.  I
would go up and down and he would push his dick up and down.  We would do
this motion really fast, like we were fucking, but I was using my mouth.
Then he started mumbling something, like he was cursing, but I couldn?t
hear what he was saying.  We did this for a while and then I could tell he
was frustrated.  He told me to lie on my back.  He then crawled on top of
me so his big dick was right over my face.  From this perspective his dick
looked gigantic, so did his balls which I instinctively lifted my head up
to and put in my mouth.  I sucked on one and then the other.  He told me to
be gentle with them and I was.  After sucking on his balls I had a bunch of
hairs in my mouth though.  Next he pointed his dick down and pushed it into
my mouth.  I didn?t do much else at this point, just laid there, covering
my teeth with my lips while he pushed his dick in and out of my mouth
really quickly.  He did this for a while and then he started cursing under
his breath.  He was also jerking his cock and I knew that at some point he
was going to cum.

I?ve cum many times and I?ve tasted my own cum before, but I got really
nervous about what he was going to do when he started.  I just closed my
eyes and got ready.  It didn?t take much longer.  His first spurt of cum
was small and I thought it wasn?t bad at all, but after that more started
coming out and then more and then more.  It tasted sour and I took a big
gulp and swallowed the mouthful of cum, but then he shot a few more times
and he filled up my mouth up again.  I swallowed it again.  I could feel
that cum was on my face and chin too but I didn?t do anything about it.
His dick was still in my mouth and he was still on top of me.  I just had
to lie there until he was done.  He stayed there for a while and left his
dick in my mouth as it got soft.  I liked it soft and kept sucking on it
and the foreskin which was starting to hang over the head.  I thought I
could stay there forever with his cum on my face and in my belly, and his
dick hanging in my mouth.

After a few minutes like this he got off of me and turned and looked at my
dick.  It had been rock hard the whole time, but I had been so busy
touching him that it never occurred to me to touch myself.  I hadn?t even
bothered to take off my underwear, which by now had a big wet spot of
pre-cum.  He took a hold of my briefs and pulled them down hard and quick.
He wrapped his big hand around my dick which vanished in his grip.  He then
started to jack me hard and fast.  The whole thing only took a few minutes.
Next thing I knew I thought my cock was literally EXPLODING.  It was the
most intense orgasm I?ve ever had, and my cum shot straight up and covered
the tent, some even landed on my face.  After I caught my breath, Troy
brought his hand over to my mouth and showed me my cum, I knew he wanted me
to lick it off and I did as he wanted.

After our little adventure Troy said not to tell anyone and it was secret
and if I did we would both get in really big trouble.  I asked him why he
asked me if I wanted give him a blow job and he said he knew I wanted to do
this.  After that he rolled over and within a few minutes I could hear
heavy breathing as he slept.  I couldn?t sleep a wink.  My mind kept
playing back over and over what had happened.  Did Troy know I was gay?
How did he know?  Was it the chap stick thing or the boner incident or
both?  Was Troy gay too and if he was why did he have a girlfriend?  I
wanted to crawl into the sleeping bag with Troy and hold onto his body but
for some reason I knew he didn?t want me to.  He wanted it to be a secret
and I guess I did too.  Instead I just scooted over to him and without
getting out of my sleeping bag I laid my head on his shoulder.  It felt so
good and warm I wanted to stay there forever.

The next day Troy acted like nothing happened.  He bossed us around and I
went back to hanging with the other boys.  I acted like nothing happened
too, but inside I felt totally different.  I couldn?t keep my eyes off of
Troy.  We had another long hike and I watched his every move.  Every step
he made was graceful and beautiful and I could see his muscles contracting
under his light shorts and t-shirt.  I wanted to be with him all the time.
Eventually we met up with CJ and the rest of the cabin and like always
there was a lot of commotion.  For a while Troy left my thoughts and I
could be a normal boy again.

The next few days at camp were agony.  If Troy gave me a smile I felt
amazing, but if he ignored me I felt horrible.  He controlled my whole
life.  He would do exercises in the morning and I started to get up early
to do them with him.  We?d do pull-ups and push-ups and he told me to keep
it up and I?d grow big muscles.  I loved this time with him, but it only
lasted a little while and then the whole cabin would be up getting ready.
At night I would secretly jerk off in my bunk and every time I imagined
Troy on top of me, with my legs wrapped around him as he made love to me.
Before in all my fantasies I had always imagined a boy my own age, but
after I had been with Troy I couldn?t think of anyone else.  I wanted to be
older and go to his college.  I imagined visiting him in his dorm room and
us having sex there.  I imagined that he didn?t have a girlfriend, but that
I would be his boyfriend.

After a few days of this I started to feel really bad and I began to feel
like Troy didn?t like me and the whole thing was a mistake.  It was
Thursday and CJ had posted that each day a different boy had to stay with
him to help clean-up the cabin for inspection.  It was my turn to stay with
CJ to sweep and take out the trash while everyone else started towards
breakfast.  But when everyone started to leave Troy told CJ to go to
breakfast and he would stay behind to clean.  I just thought Troy was
giving CJ a break but when I started sweeping Troy said, ?what are you
doing??  I said, ?sweeping?.  Troy then went to the bathroom and waved me
to come in.  I followed him in there and he locked the door behind me.  He
said, ?you really didn?t think I wanted to clean the cabin did you??  He
sat me down on the toilet and stood right in front of me.  He pulled down
his nylon shorts and boxers in one quick motion.

His big dick hung there a few inches from my face.  I looked up at his face
and he gave me look like, ?what are you waiting for.?  I leaned forward and
kissed the area around his dick, I kissed his legs and his thick pubic
hair.  He said, ?we don?t have all day, we have to go to breakfast?.  After
that I took his dick in my hand, which was still soft and put the whole
thing in my mouth.  I sucked and licked it and it before I knew it, it was
a big and hard and I had to stretch my mouth to fit it.  I jacked it with
both hands and kept the tip in my mouth.  He didn?t let me do this long and
he started jacking it himself.  He told me to hold his balls in my hand,
which I did, and he kept the head in my mouth.  After a few minutes of this
I could feel his balls moving upward toward his body and they got really
tight.  He mumbled something, I think he said he was going to cum and
that?s when he started shooting it into my mouth.  I kept swallowing as
more and more of his cum came out.  I didn?t like the sour taste and I
thought it best to just swallow it as quickly as I could.  He pulled his
dick out of my mouth and there was a big glob of cum on the tip so I licked
it right off.  He squeezed his dick a few more times and each time a
droplet of cum would appear and I?d lick it off.  It started to go soft and
he put it back in my mouth and I kept on sucking on it and playing with the
foreskin, but gently now because he told me it was sensitive.  When it was
totally soft he pulled up his pants and stood me up.  He moved me so I
faced the sink and the mirror and he stood behind me.  It was weird looking
at our reflection together.  Obviously I was much smaller than him, I?m
also fair and my checks and lips were bright pink from the blow job and my
hair which is always a curly mess was looking especially wild.  Troy looked
so different.  His hair was a straight dark crew cut, his eyes were dark,
his eyebrows were dark and his skin was a beautiful brown tan.  I was just
wearing nylon soccer shorts and he reached up the leg and pulled my dick
right out of my underwear without pulling them down.  From behind me he
started jerking me hard and fast, like he did in the tent.  He was rough
and it hurt a little bit, but it also felt good.  I looked down and his
fist completely covered my dick which was over the sink.  I looked back at
Troy in the mirror and he looked at me.  It was weird looking at his
reflection when he did this.  I wanted him to kiss me so badly, but before
I knew it, that burning explosion happened in my dick and cum shot into the
sink.

I was exhausted and I wanted to just lay down with Troy, but he took
charge.  We had to get to breakfast ASAP.  Forget the sweeping.  I just
wiped out the sink and we ran to catch up with the others.  At breakfast I
sat with my friends and ate pancakes, but I knew that I had swallowed
Troy?s cum and it was in my stomach and I would laugh to myself thinking
about it.  They must have thought I was crazy.

Ok, I just had a close call.  My mom came in to tell me to turn off the
light.  I?m going to finish this letter tomorrow when I have some more
privacy.

So after the bathroom blowjob I got a lot more confident about Troy.  I
knew he liked me and he liked what we did together so it didn?t stress me
out when he would do things with other campers or if he didn?t give me his
full attention.  He would look at me and give me a smile that I knew was
special and sometimes would just put his hand on my shoulder or rub my
back.  I didn?t want anyone to know I was gay either, so it was best to
keep it secret.

What I did hate was when he talked about his nasty girlfriend!!  I wanted
to destroy her picture.  The worst was a few days after the bathroom BJ.
Troy got his night off, which meant he was driving to town and he was going
to see his girlfriend.  It made me so mad to think he would be having sex
with her, but there was nothing I could do about it.  That night I sulked
at dinner and sat out of the soccer game that we played against another
cabin.  I just told CJ I didn?t feel well.  I couldn?t wait for lights out
so I could just go to sleep and forget the whole day had happened.

I was in deep sleep when I woke up to someone shaking me.  I opened my eyes
and it was Troy and he made a motion for me to be quiet.  He looked weird
and smelled like beer.  He got really close to me and whispered to meet him
at the canoes in 10 minutes.  He then snuck out the door.  I had no idea
what time it was.  The cabin was pitch black and as far as I could tell
everyone was asleep, but I wasn?t sure.  I was terrified that someone heard
him come in and we would be busted.  I would be kicked out of camp and they
would tell my family.  I just lay there completely still for a long time.
It seemed that everyone was asleep so I very, very slowly crawled out of my
bunk.  I found my shorts on the floor and slipped them on.  I snuck out the
door without making a sound.

The canoes are at the far end of the lake and there is a long dark path to
get there, but after a few minutes outside my eyes adjusted and the moon
and stars were so bright I could see fine.  I got to the canoes which are
stacked upside on a wooden scaffold.  You can?t see behind them which I
guess is why Troy wanted to meet here.  Behind them was Troy, he was
sitting on a tree stump drinking a can; it must have been another beer,
because when I whispered to him and he stood up a little wobbly.  You?re
not supposed to drink at camp, even councilors, and it made me a little
nervous.  I wanted to talk to him, but I didn?t know what to say, he just
stared at me kind of vacantly and I stared back.  He gestured for me to
come over to him and put his hands on my shoulders and it felt really good
for him to touch me.  He then turned me around so he was standing behind me
and wrapped his arms around me.

He squeezed me against him.  His body was hard and hot and enveloped me.
He rested his sweaty face against mine.  He had some stubble and it
scratched my face but I didn?t want to move.  His hands started to move up
and down my body.  He felt my legs, then hips, over my stomach and my
chest.  His hands stopped on my nipples and squeezed on them.  It was the
most intense feeling and I never knew how sensitive I was there!  With one
hand he held me against him and the other one went down the waistband of my
shorts and he felt my butt cheek.  He massaged my butt, first one side and
then the other.  His hand moved up and down against my butt and when he
passed over my crack he used his finger to press against my asshole.  It
surprised me and I jumped at first, but then I pushed back my butt to
encourage him, and he just let his fingers dance along my tender spots,
teasing me.  He pulled his hand out of my pants and started feeling my
nipples again.

Because he was taller than me, his dick came to just above my waist and I
could feel his hard cock against my back, but then he bent his knees so I
could feel his bulge against my butt and he would rub it up and down.  We
were still fully dressed, but he grinded his dick against my butt like he
wanted to fuck me.  It turned me on to no end and I pushed my butt back
against him too.  Finally after all that grinding he turned my face toward
his and we started kissing, first just lips, but then he stuck his tongue
in my mouth.  He tasted like beer which was gross, but I couldn?t stop
making out with him.  His tongue dominated my mouth, not unlike the way his
cock did when I was giving him blowjobs.  I was completely giving myself to
him.  He controlled my mouth with his tongue, his hands overpowered my
chest and nipples and his pushing and rubbing of his dick against my ass
left me helpless.

I knew he wanted to have sex and I started to get really nervous.  I had
fingered myself when I jerked off before, and I had imagined sex with Troy
and other boys a hundred times, but I had never done it.  I knew it would
hurt.  But then just as I would get really nervous he would move his hand
and make me feel even hotter.  He then took my shirt off and when the cool
mountain air hit my chest it was like electricity.  He kept rubbing my bare
nipples which was so intense it almost made me cum.  Next he pulled down my
shorts and underwear so I was completely naked with my dick sticking
straight up.  If someone were to happen across us now there?d be nothing we
could say.

After he pulled off my clothes he started on himself.  I turned around and
saw him throw his shirt on the ground followed by shorts and boxers.  He
stood there completely naked in the moonlight.  Each of his muscles pressed
against the underside of his skin and his dick stood out from his hairy
crotch like a pole.  He looked at me with a wild look and I was scared.  He
came to me again and turned me around so I could feel his heat and
nakedness against my back again.  He kissed my neck and fondled my butt and
legs a little more before walking us over to the canoes.  I wasn?t sure
what was going to happen next, so I just let him guide me.  At the canoes
he lifted my right leg up so it rested on the bottom canoe.  Lifting my leg
up made my ass completely exposed and now I knew how he wanted to do it.
He had a little container of lube in his hand and squeezed it onto his
fingers.  He smeared the cold lube all around my hole and then slid one
finger inside me.  It was weird, but as soon as he did this it was my
instinct to bend over and push back.  I moved back and forth on his lubed
up finger as he pushed it in and out of me.  It was feeling really good and
then he added a second finger which was tight but also slid in easily.  His
fingers were a lot bigger than mine and as I rode them I wondered if his
dick wouldn?t hurt as bad as I feared.  Just then he pulled his fingers out
of me and turned his attention to himself.  I looked back as he covered his
giant cock up and down with lube.  It was definitely a lot bigger than two
fingers.  My mind was going a mile a minute, but I stayed bent over, open
to him, I didn?t want to move.  I wanted him inside of me.

Troy came up to me and didn?t say a word, he hadn?t spoken all night.
Still bent over, with one leg up, I was at his mercy.  He took my hip with
one hand and the base of his dick with the other and guided the tip right
against the center of my ass.  He didn?t force it in right away; he just
gently pressed it, which felt amazing.  It also made me want it even more.
He pressed then eased off, pressed then eased off a few more times then
finally he pushed in hard.  AHH!  I screamed because it hurt really bad.
He told me I had to be quiet because we were on the lake and the sound
would carry.  He pushed into me again and I could feel my ass stretching
open, but it hurt so bad I couldn?t stand it.  I reached around and pushed
him off of me.  It was humiliating, I wanted him so bad, but I couldn?t
take it.  I asked him if we could do it another time but he said it had to
be tonight.  He bend me over the canoe again, added some more lube and
starting pushing his cock into me again.  I closed my eyes and tried not to
make a sound but the stretching of me ass hurt and tears started to well up
in my eyes.  He was mumbling and cursing under his breath too and I knew I
was too small for him and he was frustrated.  He pulled it out and I stood
up trying to hide my tears, so embarrassed that tonight was such a
disaster.  He told me I had to relax, that my ass was too tight and I just
apologized.  Then he said maybe we should try a different position.

Troy led me over to some grass and spread out our clothes to lie on.  He
lay on his back and gestured for me to come over and straddle him.  I was
scared and my dick was now completely soft, but I wanted to make him happy.
I placed a knee on either side of waist straddling his cock.  He put some
lube on his fingers and I leaned forward as he reached around and spread
more lube on my ass.  I took this opportunity to kiss him some more, but he
was more interested in getting lubed up for another go.  He starting
rubbing his big cock up and down along my crack and it got me so horny I
forgot the pain I had felt a few moments before.  This time I took his dick
and lined it up to my ass.  I slowly lowered myself onto it but it still
hurt really bad though and I couldn?t get it to go in at all.  Then Troy
told me to relax and I closed my eyes and started breathing really slow.  I
imagined my body was light as a feather and all my muscles were light and
loose.  I pressed my ass against his dick and very slowly it started to go
in.  It hurt but I just kept my eyes closed and kept breathing and took it
very slow.  Eventually I opened my eyes and Troy was looking right at me.
I looked right in his eyes as his dick was easing into me.  I knew he
wasn?t very deep in me, but I had to stop.  Next I started moving up and
down.  He closed his eyes and the look on face told me he liked what I was
doing.

I kept moving up and down as much as I could stand which wasn?t much.  It
didn?t feel as good as I imagined it would, but my mind was spinning
because I was actually having sex with Troy!  He reached up and pulled me
forward toward him and pressed the side of my face was against his chest.
He was sweaty and his chest tasted salty.  I liked his sweaty body under
me.  There was a faint smell, like BO coming from his hairy armpits but it
wasn?t bad, it smelled good.  It smelled like Troy and it mixed with the
grass and earth beneath us.  I could hear his heavy breathing and felt his
hot breath on my neck.  His arms were wrapped around me and held me against
his sweaty body and he starting lifting his hips up pushing deeper into me.
Every time he would push up the muscles in his stomach and chest would
contract and tighten underneath me.  I would push back at the same time and
when I did not only did his dick go deeper in me, but my sweaty body would
slide across his hard sweaty stomach.  Then he moved his hands down so one
was on each butt cheek and he pulled them apart.  When he did this it sort
of opened me up more and when he thrust into me and I could feel he was
going deeper.  The combination of it all, his smell, his taste the pushing
and rubbing made me forget the pain.  This was the most amazing feeling
I?ve ever had.  We were one body moving perfectly together.  I forgot about
everything, like Troy and I were in our own world and then I started to
feel an eruption inside me.  I got really hot and my whole body started to
convulse and tighten up on its own, especially in my ass where Troy?s dick
was, I didn?t know what was happening, my ass just kept tightening around
his cock, over and over again.  My face was buried in his chest and I
squeezed his shoulders with all my strength, like a lightning bolt went
through my body.  I tried to breath, but the only thing I could do was cry
his name, Troy?

I blacked out for a second after that.  When I came to I was dripping sweat
and I could feel our stomachs were slippery and that?s when I knew I had
cum.  He was still inside me and I wanted him to cum too.  He made me sit
up a little bit, so his dick was at a different angle and he started
fucking me really fast.  Thankfully he wasn?t in very deep, because it was
still uncomfortable.  He started cursing and I knew that meant he was going
to cum soon and sure enough he slowed down and then pushed in really deep
and moaned really loud.  I could feel it shooting inside of me and I
tightened my ass to squeeze his cock and get his cum out.  He shivered
under me and pushed in deep a few more times shooting more loads into me
before he stopped and caught his breath.  He closed his eyes breathing
deeply and his face looked flush and sweaty.  I was hot too, but I didn?t
want to stop.  I just leaned forward and rested my head on his chest again.
He put his hand on my head and I said I loved him.  He didn?t say anything
back, which didn?t bother me I guess.

We lay like that for a while and even drifted off to sleep for a few
minutes.  His dick got soft again and slid out of me.  My butt was sore and
still felt like it was stretched open wide, but when I reached back to
inspect myself it was fine and had closed up.  It made me smile to know
Troy?s cum was inside me.

Eventually Troy came to his senses and told me I had to get up.  Climbing
off of him I realized that both our stomachs were sticky with my cum and he
told me to dip my underwear in the lake and wipe it off.  We both put on
our clothes and I felt dirty and like I needed a shower but Troy said it
would look weird if I took a shower now since its 3am and the whole camp is
asleep, and I?m just going to have to wait until morning.  He told me to
sneak in first and he would follow in a little bit.  I started back to the
cabin when I had the urgent sense that I needed to go to the bathroom.  I
started to get scared, that maybe Troy had hurt me or maybe my ass got
stretch out too much.  I went to the bathroom by the cafeteria and barely
got my shorts off in time.  When I sat down though I didn?t go to the
bathroom, but Troy?s cum came out of me.  It was weird and I didn?t know
that would happen, but it did.  After that I went back to the cabin and
luckily no one woke up when I snuck back in.

The next morning was weird.  I thought that maybe I had dreamt the whole
thing.  Troy was in his bunk, but he wasn?t going to breakfast.  CJ said he
didn?t feel good.  That day I did the same old stuff with my cabin mates,
but they all seemed much younger to me.  I wasn?t a virgin any more.  I
knew something that none of them knew.  So much changed in one night.

Troy acted like nothing had happened and it was more of the same.  We were
with other campers all the time and it was impossible to get alone time
with him.  He didn?t boss me around like he did the other kids but he
didn?t try to spend any special time with me either.  I wanted to be with
him so bad, but it was the last week of camp and the days were flying by.

Finally it was the last day and we ate our last lunch before parents were
going to show up.  Troy didn?t eat lunch with us which was strange, but
then after lunch I learned why.  We walked out of the cafeteria and he was
sitting with his girlfriend!  They were holding hands and he waved us over
so all of us could meet her.  All the other boys had a crush on her and ran
over, but when Troy called to me I just stood there and got really hot and
I started to feel like I was going to cry.  I turned the other way and ran
back to the cabin, I locked myself in the bathroom and started crying
harder then I had ever cried.  After a few minutes I heard a knock at the
door and it was Troy.  I let him in and he asked me if I was upset because
it was the last day of camp.  I was mad but I was confused.  I told him I
didn?t know why she was her.  He told me because it was his girlfriend and
it wasn?t against the rules and then I started crying again and I told him
I thought he was gay and he liked me.  After a long time he got down close
to me and told me sometimes guys do things together when there aren?t any
girls around but that didn?t mean they were gay.  Then he told me he knew I
was gay and it was ok and that I was special and he didn?t mean to hurt me.
That was it.  He started to walk away and I grabbed his arm and pulled him
to me and started kissing him really hard on the lips, and I even stuck my
tongue in his mouth.  His beard was bristly, but somehow I knew this was
the last time I would kiss him and I couldn?t let go.  I wrapped my arms
around him and squeezed and he kissed me back. It was a sad kiss though and
he pushed me back and told me that parents were going to be here soon and I
needed to pack.

The ride back home with my mom was silent.  She told me it looked like I
had grown since I was away.  Maybe I had or maybe it?s just because I was
older inside.  I thought about Troy every day for the rest of the summer.
I emailed him a few times and attached a pic from camp that my mom said
made me look cute.  He wrote me back, but the emails never mentioned what
happened between us.  At first I thought I was in love with Troy and
imagined us being together, but I kept thinking about what he said and I
knew it would never happen (not to mention our age difference!)  Eventually
I realized I didn?t love him, but what we did together made me think I did.
I was just confused.

The rest of the summer was pretty boring.  I went to sports camp with my
school and I am not that great, but I thought about what a great athlete
Troy was, so I worked really hard and the coach said I?d be really good on
the tennis team.  I also kept doing the exercises I used to do with Troy in
the morning and I started to notice that I had some muscles.  Towards the
end of the summer I had a terrible sore throat for two weeks and I thought
it was a cold but my brother said my voice was changing.  I was so happy
about that!  I also noticed one morning as I was lying on the floor I had
thick blonde hairs all around the bottom of my legs.  They sort of appeared
over night.  I know these are normal changes, but part of me thought it was
Troy that made them happen.

I?ll never tell anyone about Troy, I don?t think they would understand.
I?m glad about what we did, but I?m going to wait a long time before I do
those things again and when I do it?s going to be with a boyfriend and I
want us to love each other.

Sincerely,

Me

P.S. There is a new boy in my class named Keith, he?s an artist and he?s
really quiet, but really cute.  This weekend we went to a movie and in the
dark of the theater he started holding my hand.  I wanted him to kiss me
too, but I?m going to wait.  :)