Date: Mon, 18 Jun 2012 08:39:11 +0800
From: Ben Ng <ng.ben9@gmail.com>
Subject: Rick's Diary Part 39 - Reunion

Reunion

You would think that the fateful call would be from Ben, but
it was not. It was the last person I would expect to receive a
call from.

"Hey Rick."

"You are...?"

"I'm Josh! You don't recognize my voice?"

"Sorry, it's been a while, and I didn't expect you to call."

"It's ok. Listen, the reason I called... would you like to see
Ben again?"

My body shook. It was what I wanted most. Just the thought of
seeing him again sent chills all over my body. "I... of course I
do! But... is that what he wants? He hasn't been answering my
calls."

Josh sighed. "He doesn't know how to face you. He feels
guilty. But he talks about you a lot. He always says what a
great friend you are, how you stood by him, and how he
wouldn't be here if it weren't for you." My tears started
falling involuntarily. It seemed that in the past year I cried
more than all my previous years combined.

"Then why... why wouldn't he even talk to me? I thought he
wanted nothing to do with me!"

"You know him, Rick. He's conflicted. He doesn't know what he
truly wants, and he's afraid what it might bring." It's so
true. In the brief time we were together as lovers, we were
happy, but it was also his worst nightmare, as he faced his
past. Ever since then he's been living on the surface,
enjoying casual sex, but not daring to look deeper.

"So, what do you have in mind?"

"I've invited Ben to a reunion. I told him we could get away
and fuck like rabbits. Of course he couldn't refuse." Josh
chuckled.

"Aren't you two a pair now? Why would you want me there?"

"You didn't know? We broke up. Well, we were never officially
in a relationship anyway. We had an agreement. We could fuck
anyone we wanted, no strings attached." I smiled. That's the
Ben I knew.

"So why did you two break up? I thought you guys were a good
match."

"We were, but... I'll let him tell you in person. Anyway, are
you up for it?"

"Of course, I wouldn't miss it for anything. But are you sure
he's ok with it?"

"I know him, Rick, trust me. Just come. I'll give you the time
and place. Write it down." I quickly scribbled the information
on my palm. On my way home, I was so nervous my hands were
sweating. I was so afraid my sweat would wash away the ink.

It was a mountain cabin, three hours away from the city. It
would be the best place for a getaway fuck fest. I thought, if
I couldn't be with him forever, at least I could have him for
three days? That would keep me going for another year.

I couldn't tell you how excited, or how hard I was driving up
the mountain. I had to stop and jerk off three times before I
got there. When I reached there Josh came out to greet me. He
gave me a hug.

"I could never compete with you, Rick. I thought I had him,
but in his mind there was only you." He said softly, and there
was jealously.

"Is that why he chose you over me?" I laughed.

"He chose me to replace you, Rick. He chose me only because he
could have my ass anytime and I don't ask questions."

I sighed. I understood how it was. I looked into his eyes and
immediately we had an understanding. We both loved the man,
but hated his ways.

"One thing I know," Josh said, "he's not happy without you."

"You... think so?"

"Even when we were together he kept talking about the good
times he had with you. It was then that I realized he was
deeply in love with you."

"How could it be? He said he couldn't be with me!"

"He's conflicted. He said your love was too intense, that he
felt suffocated. He tried to go back to his old life, the
meaningless sex, he said that's what you called it."

"Indeed. And he's not happy?"

"No, not by a long shot. He was ok for a while, and then he
was depressed again. He told me how much he wished you were
here, but how he didn't have the guts to call you back."

"I don't understand. It's just a call..."

"I'll let him explain it to you. He's just inside."

I walked in, feeling so many emotions. Was it true? Ben loved
me? He wasn't happy without me? I felt dizzy. What if this was
a lie, a cruel joke? I couldn't bear to be heartbroken again!

And then I saw him, Ben standing there in his sweatpants and
jersey, looking so sexy. His hair was longer now, not the
short, spiky hair I knew him by. But the rest of his body...
whatever I could see, was every bit as attractive and
beautiful as ever. He stood there, beer in hand, stunned. His
beer dropped to the floor, spilling everywhere.

"Rick?" He sounded surprised. He couldn't believe I was there!
Without another word he rushed toward me and tackled me to the
ground. It was meant to be a hug, but the full force of his
body brought me to the ground with him.

"Why are you here?" When I looked up to his face, he was
wiping away tears.

"Josh invited me."

"Oh, that devil! He did it without telling me?"

Josh smiled. "I'll leave you two to catch up." He walked
upstairs.

Ben pulled me up with his powerful arms. He was still every
bit as strong. We settled down on the couch. "I'm so happy to
see you." He wiped more tears from his eyes. "How have you
been?"

"Miserable... without you." At that point I was able to be
completely honest with my feelings. We've been through so much
together. There was no point in hiding. "You haven't returned
my calls. I thought..."

"I don't know how to face you." Ben forced a smile. "I'm a
fucking coward, you are right. I've been running away all my
life."

"And you catch me every time." He chuckled. "I thought about
what you said a lot, this past year. You are right, as
always."

"You were right to call Jimmy a coward. He chose to leave, to
leave me for his own freedom. He chose not to come back. He
probably started a new life with someone else." I was
surprised at the ease Ben said those words. It would have been
completely unthinkable a year before.

"And I've been a coward for not wanting to accept the fact
that Jimmy probably forgot about me." He wiped a tear away.
"You were right, as you've always been. You are always the
wise one. What should I do without you?"

I was shaking in disbelief. Ben must have gone through hell to
come to this realization. I remembered the rage he was in when
he heard me calling Jimmy a coward. Now he was able to say the
same. What a big change in a year!

"What have you been doing this past year?" I asked
incredulously.

"To hell, and back." Ben chuckled. "Many nights of soul
searching. Oh, and professional counseling helps." He smiled
sheepishly.

"I'm so glad for you, Ben."

"Yes, me too. Can you be in my life again?"

I was moved to tears. This was what I was hoping for. I took a
deep breath. "Yes, but I want commitment this time."

"Exclusive?"

"I understand who you are and I won't ask that of you."

Ben hugged me tightly. "Oh, I love you, man! I'm going to try,
Rick, but don't go ballistic if I slip."

"When you slip, you mean?" He chuckled.

"Look, I don't mind you messing around with Josh. As with
girls, we've been fucking them all through high school and
college. That's not a problem. But I hope you limit your
partners, and always use protection."

Ben kissed me all over my face. "Yes, yes, yes! I'd be happy
just to have you and Josh. I don't care about others now. You
two are the best!"

"I want you to try to love me back the way I love you, and be
committed to stay together, grow together, taking the
relationship seriously, not just for sex."

"Yes, it's time to take things to the next level. It's time
for me to learn to love."

We hugged and cried together. We broke apart after a while and
Ben looked deep into my eyes and said, "I want to do something
special for you, Rick, would you like me to make love to you?"

"More than anything." I whispered.

Ben pulled me onto his back and carried me upstairs fireman
style. Josh wolf whistled and cheered for me from the guest
bedroom. Ben carried me all the way to the master bedroom at
the end and threw me onto the king size bed.

"I'm going to make love to you, all day and all night long,
Rick. I'm going to make up for all the lost time." He planted
a deep kiss on me and we started taking off each other's
clothes. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his powerful body on top
of mine and the fluffy bed below me. It was like a dream. The
best part of my life was about to begin.