Date: Wed, 12 Feb 2003 13:20:39 -0800 (PST)
From: Evan Bradely <evanbradley33@yahoo.com>
Subject: Chapter 40 of "Ambush"

The following fictional story deals with sex among males.  If
you are offended by such material, are too young, or reside in
an area where it is not allowed, depart. Though not observed in
this story, care enough about yourself and humankind to practice
safe sex.

The author retains all rights.  No reproductions or links to
other sites are allowed without the author's consent.

EvanBradley33@Yahoo.com

Chapter 40
Tough Questions

After the Friday evening Morgan Pizza Feast, Troy had nudged
Drew toward the kitchen, telling him to make himself useful,
drawing a baneful look in response. Troy was pleased with his
plans:  Drew was becoming aware of expectations he needed to
fulfill to become a model big brother.  When the three other
Morgan brothers returned home, Drew would have taken steps to
become a worthy stand-in for Troy.  Troy's plans had a simple
focus:  Drew was the Morgan sibling most like their father,
Roy - well, not like him but inclined toward his unconscious
assumptions.  Troy wanted to reverse that orientation.  Just as
he'd insisted that Drew help Emily Morgan, their mother, bring
in the sacks of groceries the day before, he was now insisting
that Drew break his usual behavioral pattern.  If nothing else,
Troy could broaden Drew's perspectives, helping him understand
that he wasn't demeaning himself if he looked out for others and
pitched in to help - even in a kitchen.

Evan, Susan and Drew had cleaned up the kitchen just as guests
began arriving for the Movie Marathon honoring Troy's brothers.
First it was Burt Graham and Jonah Stedman, who'd brought Greg
Dunwoodie and Denton Cooper with them. Earlier that day, Troy
had realized that it would be a good occasion to integrate Jonah
with some older high school students who would start looking out
for him when Robert Martin wasn't around.  And it was a ready-
made opportunity to begin to build on Burt's connection with
them and his reorientation to school. When Burt had finally
tracked Denton Cooper down, he'd learned about Denton's making a
friend on his own - Greg Dunwoodie.  Burt had insisted that he
and Jonah pick up Denton and Greg on the way to Troy's
gathering. Characteristically, Denton was wary about showing up
uninvited, but Greg assured him that, after having spent nearly
an entire school year in Evan Halsey's class, he knew Evan
wouldn't mind.  In fact, Greg had boasted, "Wanna bet me that
Evan comes right over when he sees me and hugs me?"

Denton thought a moment.  'Once this Evan guy sees me, a
stranger, he won't be so friendly.  Besides, he's a teacher.
Teachers don't like me.  For once I can beat Greg at something.'
"How much do you want to bet?" he asked Greg.

"Going to a Templeton basketball game with me," Greg answered.

Denton considered the cost only a few seconds.  "Okay, but what
do I get if I win?"

"You name some place you want me to go with you."

"You're on."

Burt was so glad when Denton told him about his new friend Greg.
He saw it as one more hedge against Denton's remaining a
dropout.  He smiled at Denton's stepping out of his shy stance
to strike up an acquaintance with a stranger.  He also wanted
to observe these two more closely.  It was a duo he couldn't
imagine after Denton told him Greg was gay.  But he immediately
recognized, even if Denton didn't, that Denton eventually
followed Greg in just about everything.  This Greg looked like
another good influence in Denton's life. Burt didn't want to
lose Denton as a buddy, and he wanted something good to happen
for the guy.  He was glad to discover an ally in Greg.  It was
also a plus that Greg knew a lot of Templeton students that all
of them had recently met.

True to Greg's prediction, as soon as Evan saw him, he walked
over and hugged Greg, welcoming him to the evening's
festivities.  Greg turned to Denton.  "I win.  You owe me,
Denton."

Greg introduced Evan to Denton.  What was the bet?" Evan asked
Denton.

"That you would hug Greg as soon as you saw him," Denton
replied, smiling shyly.

Evan chuckled, observing, "This circle of friends is so close
that betting someone hugs someone else is easy money.  I hope I
didn't cost you too much."

"Naw.  I just have to go with Greg to your high school's
basketball game."

Evan smiled.  "Sounds to me like you won too."

Troy walked over, hugging first Burt, who initially pulled back
only slightly, but then moved into the hug.  The Troy introduced
Burt to Evan, who greeted him warmly.  Jonah needed no
coaxing for a hug from Troy.  Troy hugged Greg, greeting him
warmly, squeezing the back of his neck with his hand, making him
promise that he'd stop being a stranger.  Even though he sensed
Denton was shy, Troy hugged him too, feeling Denton stiffen but
not pull away. When they stepped away from each other, Denton
had a goofy grin on his face. He was no longer fighting any of
the attention or ready acceptance he was receiving.  It was so
unusual.  He wasn't used to it.  Made him feel the way he did
after he'd downed his first bottle of beer as a youth.

Jeremy and Kenny took their turns at greeting the guests, but as
Kenny stepped back from Jonah, he placed his hand on Jonah's
shoulder and squeezed.  He wanted Jonah to know that he really
WAS welcome in the group.  They greeted Greg profusely, glad to
see him coming out of his shell.  And they made certain that
Denton knew that they welcomed him to their midst as well.
After introductions, Jeremy sat in an easy chair, inviting the
others to do so, but Kenny flopped down at Jeremy's feet,
leaning up against Jeremy's leg.  When Burt sat down in a chair,
Jonah imitated Kenny, leaning up against Burt's leg, earning a
startled look from Burt and Denton.  Immediately thinking he'd
gone too far, Jonah started to roll forward away from Burt, but
Burt quickly placed his hand on Jonah, pulling him back, giving
him a reassuring smile.  "Stay put, Bro," Burt told Jonah.  "I
need this."  Burt winked at Denton, earning a faint smile.  When
Troy sat down on the carpet facing the guys, conversation began
immediately.

At that point, Riley came tromping up the steps from Troy's
bedroom, took one look at Jonah, he being closest to Riley's
age, and marched up to him, demanding to know who he was,
offering to show him around "Troy's house."  Jonah, a little
intimidated by Riley's forceful personality, followed along,
rather wide-eyed at this little human dynamo.  Soon, Riley had
"latched onto" Jonah.  They were wandering through the house,
chattering like monkeys.  "How old are you anyway," Riley
demanded.

"I'm twelve," Jonah answered, a little hesitantly.

"And you go to high school with Troy and those guys?" Riley
demanded.

"Yeah."

"How can you be twelve and be in high school?"

"I studied hard, learned a lot, and was jumped two grades ahead
of kids my age."

"Oh," Riley said, his eyes growing wide, obviously impressed,
probably for the first time that day.  He stood thinking a
moment.  Then he hitched his jeans up, stating, "That's what I'm
gonna do - study a lot and then get jumped.  Then I'll play
basketball with Troy and Cody."

"Well, everyone knows Troy's smart, so you just might be able to
do that."

"Yeah," Riley said with some vigor.  He looked Jonah up and down
momentarily.  "So you're one of the big guys?"

Jonah realized that Riley was looking up to him as filling a
role he'd never held. He liked it!  "I guess I am, but then if
you study hard, you'll be one of the big guys too."

Riley thought for a second.  "I'm already gettin' there," Riley
observed matter-of-factly.

Tony Francini and Angela Walker arrived next, waving at Evan as
they were escorted into the family room by Justin, Troy's middle
brother, whom Troy had sent to check the front door.  Both were
introduced to Burt and Denton.  Tony sat down with the guys.
After introductions, Angela joined the kitchen contingent,
greeting Evan and Susan and being introduced to Drew, who was
charmed when she exclaimed that it was a privilege to meet one
of Troy's brothers, especially one just as handsome.  Drew stood
taller, shoving his hands in the pockets of his jeans in an "aw
shucks" manner, giving Angela a killer smile just like Troy's.
It was all Evan could do to keep from cracking up.  Susan
glanced at Evan, her eyes alight, sharing Evan's amusement.
With Angela's arrival, Drew drifted out to join the guys.

Cody Saxon arrived next.  Again Justin played host, leading Cody
to the family room with Cody's arm slung over Justin's
shoulders.  Justin turned quickly when he felt Cody's arm laid
across his shoulder, his eyes wide, his mouth open.  Cody slid
his hand around the back of Justin's neck and shook it in
gentle, companionable micro movements.  After that, Justin was
glued to Cody's side, seemingly mesmerized.  Cody and Troy
hugged and kissed each other on the cheek, causing Burt's and
Denton's eyes to widen a little.  Burt looked at Tony, who just
smiled back and then waved at Cody.  Cody greeted Tony, Burt,
and Denton in turn.

Evan responded to knocking on the front door, where he found
Byron Okata and Sherry Westbrook with Jarod Paine and Valerie
Cunningham coming up the walk behind the younger couple.  Evan
smiled, thinking 'this is beginning to feel like a party, not a
movie evening.  Troy has made some interesting choices of
guests. He wants Byron and Sherry to know that they are now
insiders in Troy's circle of friends.'

Once back inside, Evan took pleasure from the chatting groups in
the kitchen and the family room.  Riley was dragging Jonah from
group to group, pushing for introductions to the strangers and
earning interested responses from the newcomers.  Jonah handled
it all gracefully.  Riley eyed each and every one of them,
quizzing them about their connection to Troy, a process that
earned a subtle smile from big brother who was standing aside,
having just greeted the newcomers, visiting but monitoring Riley
as well.

Eventually, Jonah gravitated back to Burt, followed by Riley.
Fairly quickly, Tony and Riley each took measure of the other
and started a game of Challenge and Putdown.  "You cook in that
restaurant?" Riley asked Tony, slowing down to get all the
syllables in the last word.

Tony grinned at the insouciant manner of Riley's interrogation.
He liked this kid who showed all the promise of being a smart
ass like himself.  "If they need for me to.  Usually I wait
tables.  Why?"

"I ever eaten there?" Riley asked Tony.

"If you had, little boy, you'd have remembered it.  We serve
great Italian food!"

Riley's eyes narrowed at Tony's addressing him as a little boy.
"I'm not a little boy," Riley responded with a little attitude.

"Then what are you?"

"I'm Troy's brother," he responded sharply, drawing himself up.

"Shouldn't you be in bed, little boy?" Tony challenged.

Riley's eyes fired.  "Shouldn't you be in your kitchen, big boy?"
Tony's mouth spread into a jaw-breaking grin, for he'd gotten a
rise out of Riley.  Angela, who had joined the group, was trying
to hide a giggle, evoked by Tony's having so quickly found his
match an in a fella not even half his size.

Eventually, Troy told Riley to round up the crew for a movie.
For all his brashness, Riley demonstrated some charm as he
invited others to watch "a great basketball movie."  Just prior
to the movement to the family room, Susan, Angela and Valerie
had made bowls of popcorn for everyone.

"What are we watching?" Jarod asked.

"Well, Evan said he wouldn't mind watching 'Hoosiers' with us,"
Troy said, "so that will play first."  There were hoots,
applause, and cheers, earning a smile from Troy.

"A basketball movie!  Now why am I not surprised about that?"
Valerie asked. Since most of the seats were taken, Evan plopped
down on the carpet a bit away from the others, causing the
slightest frown to appear on Susan's face.  Evan didn't notice.

Troy and Susan sat together on a sofa to watch the movie,
immediately holding hands.  For perhaps the first half hour,
Riley sat with Burt and Jonah, frequently looking over at Troy
and Susan.  When the basketball games in the movie started, Evan
watched with interest the way Troy and Cody would caution Drew
or Justin to watch how a play was run or stopped.  Finally,
Riley wandered over and stood by Troy, listening to Cody and him
coaching Drew and Justin.  Occasionally, Burt or one of the
other guys - once even Denton - would ask a basketball question.
So Riley asked Cody why a character in the movie had turned the
way he did.  "Riley, butt out," Drew told him irritably.  "This
is big guy talk."  Troy shot Drew a look that ended his putdown
of Riley.  Cody went ahead and answered his question, pulling
Riley in against him in an informal hug and pointing out related
play in the scene.  Troy realized that he would have to initiate
another kind of coaching with Drew too.  He decided to let it
pass until after the movie.

As Riley watched more of the game, he began to rub his eyes,
fighting sleep. Finally he walked over to Troy and climbed into
his lap.  Troy dropped Susan's hand to help Riley settle in and
lean back on Troy's chest.  After perhaps five minutes of
Riley's looking up and back and then to the side, checking Troy
out and then Susan, he reached down and put Susan's hand back in
Troy's.  He smiled at Susan, causing her to lean over to kiss
his cheek.  She followed that with a kiss on Troy's cheek.  He
turned and captured her lips with his.  When Troy straightened
back up, Riley looked at one, then the other, then gently
touched his cheek with his fingers where Susan had kissed him.
After about ten seconds Riley reached down and grabbed Troy's
left hand, pulling it so that it rested on Riley's stomach.
Troy squeezed him in a hug as he moved his head around to kiss
Riley on the cheek.  Riley sighed and wriggled back against
Troy. Fifteen minutes later, Riley had fallen asleep, the
slightest of smiles gracing his face.

"I think I'll put Riley in my bed," Troy whispered to Susan.
Then he won't cramp folks' style up here."

"I'll turn back the covers," Susan said as Troy gently scooted
to the edge of the sofa and arose, cradling Riley in his arms
without waking him.  Caught up in one of the movie's scenes of
Hickory High School beating an opposing school in a fast-paced
game, the guests turned momentarily to see what was happening,
smiling at Riley's angelic look.  Cody arose and followed Troy
and Susan, missing a questioning look from Justin.

Susan preceded Troy, pulling back the covers of Troy's bed.
Troy lay Riley gently on one side, allowing Susan and Cody to
help in taking off Riley's shirt, jeans, and hiking boots and
socks.  "I'll take him to the bathroom," Troy whispered to Susan
and Cody.  He picked Riley up against his chest as Riley
snuggled into Troy's neck and clasped his legs around Troy's
waist.  As Troy left the room, Cody moved to Susan, embracing
and kissing her warmly.

Riley emitted only the faintest of whimpers when, upon arriving
in the bathroom, Troy stood him in front of the toilet and
pulled down his white briefs (Riley had pitched a fit in the
fall, declaring that he was wearing briefs like Troy's - "with
no little animals on them, Mom!").  Emily had smiled at his
defiance, noting happily that Riley was modeling himself after
Troy.  When he was finished, Riley pulled up his briefs, turning
toward Troy with his eyes closed and raising his arms to be
picked up.  Troy flushed the stool and then cradled Riley like
a baby.  Riley snuggled up against Troy's expansive chest and
promptly fell back to sleep.

Back in the bedroom, Troy noted with a smile that his lovers
were kissing.  He gently lay Riley on one side of the bed,
pulling the covers up over him.  Riley rolled over on his side
and curled up in a little ball.  Turning toward Cody and Susan,
Troy joined them in a three-way hug and kiss.

Unbeknownst to the three, Justin, noticing that Cody didn't
return, had quietly gone downstairs.  As he turned from the
bottom step to enter Troy's bedroom, he spied the group hug with
warm, slow kisses exchanged by all.  His eyes widened. Then he
gulped, feeling a pain in his gut.  At first he couldn't tear
himself away from watching the three even though his instincts
told him to run.  After five seconds, he listened to his gut,
wondering why he hurt inside.  Just as he turned to tiptoe up
the stairs, Troy detected movement out of the corner of his eye,
catching a glimpse of Justin's shapely butt as he quietly moved
up the stairs. Seeing Troy turn to look in the direction of the
stairs, Cody and Susan broke off a kiss to see what had caught
Troy's attention, but they saw nothing.  Susan gave Troy a
questioning look.  "Justin saw us," Troy whispered.

"How did he react?" Susan whispered.

"I'm not sure," Troy replied.  "I guess you noticed, Cody, that
he's been your shadow ever since you arrived."

Forsaking the cocky smile that would have been his customary
response to someone's paying so much attention to him, Cody
shook his head a little.  "Yeah. Hero worship, maybe?" he asked.

"Oh yeah," Troy replied, "big time."

"What's to be done?" Susan asked.

"Let's play it by ear," Troy whispered back.  "We need to see
where he is about what he saw before we talk to him.  But we'd
all better be ready for questions from him.  How do you think we
should answer him?"

They paused in thought.  "We don't have to be graphic," Cody
replied, "but we have to answer him with some degree of honesty.
Otherwise, he may never trust us again, and he may hold back
from getting close to someone.  He's also part of our family."

"Good plan," Susan responded.  "We better get upstairs before
we're missed."

Evan had been caught up in the scene in the movie where Jimmie,
the team star, tells the assembled citizens of Hickory that he
will quit playing ball again if they force the new coach to
leave.  Suddenly, Justin shot into his right peripheral visual
field, causing him to look over.  Justin paused, scanning the
group, looking pale, breathing heavily.  As Justin pondered the
various groups spread throughout the room, he looked at Evan,
who arched his brows as though asking if all were well.  Justin
hesitated until he heard steps on the stairs.  Then he shot over
and plopped down by Evan, giving him a tentative smile.  He
stared at the movie as Troy, Susan, and Cody walked into the
family room.  Evan noticed that they looked all around for
Justin.  When they noted him by Evan, the trio exchanged
glances.  'Oh boy,' Evan thought, 'I wonder what drama is
unfolding here.' Evan's eyebrows arched again, shooting the trio
a wordless question.  Troy raised his palm slightly in a gesture
that communicated 'later.'  Evan shook his head okay.

Troy and Susan resumed their places on the sofa, while Cody,
following Jonah's and Kenny's lead, leaned back against their
legs.  Drew, who'd stayed close to Troy since his kitchen duty
had ended, looked casually over at the group, then turned back
to the movie.  In a second his head shot back toward the trio.
He was staring at them, taking the arrangement in.  It was only
a micro movement, but Evan, who'd been watching the byplay,
noted Drew's pressing his lips tightly together.  Evan glanced
at Jeremy and Kenny, who had tipped to the combined behaviors
playing out in the family room.  Now arching his eyebrows,
Jeremy caught Evan's eyes.  Evan's left eyebrow cocked in manner
that communicated a shrug.

Not much in the scenario changed while the movie played itself
out to the winning climax.  At its end, Jared asked what was
next on the playbill.  "You've Got Mail," Susan replied.

"A chick flick," Jared moaned, rolling over on his back on the
carpet.

Valerie punched Jared in the stomach gently.  "You guys have had
your testosterone fix, so now we women get a turn."  Realizing
the response expected of them, the guys groaned in surrender.

"I didn't know you wanted a testosterone fix," Tony leaned over
toward Angela, leering.

Angela shoved him back.  "Down, boy."

"No heavy petting," Cody remarked, smirking at Jarod and Tony.

"Speak for yourself," Tony shot back as soft giggles were heard
about the room. Justin was staring straight ahead, frowning.
Both Troy and Cody had tried to catch his eye, but he was
studiously ignoring them.  Drew's lips remained a compressed
line.  Evan asked Justin if he'd like more popcorn or something
to drink.  Justin quietly declined.

Byron and Sherry were sitting on the carpet, watching these
exchanges with interest.  While they had been included in the
group on several social outings, this was perhaps more intimate
than those occasions.  Byron softly moaned on protest.  "What?"
Sherry asked.

"I hate these situations when everybody knows what's going on,
but I haven't got a clue."

Sherry leaned over, giving him a peck on the lips.  "Join the
crew," she said, smiling.  "I know something's going on, I
guess, but I couldn't say what it is."

Byron smiled, kissing her back.  "That's one of the many reasons
I love you," he said.  "We're both on the same wavelength."

"Maybe," she replied.  "But I'm not a brain like you."

Byron noticed how much Sherry's eyes were shining with
admiration.  "Stick with me kid.  You'll be a brain too."
Sherry chuckled and leaned in for another kiss.

Here and there others arose for a bathroom break or for
something to drink. Some replenished their bowls of popcorn
while others were conversing, waiting for the first tape to
rewind and the next to be started.  Evan arose, moving to the
kitchen.  Drew followed him, asking if he could use the master
bathroom.  Evan assured him he could, and Drew moved off
rapidly.

Just before the start of the movie, Evan pleaded weariness,
excusing himself and wishing them a good night.  As he walked to
his bedroom, Drew passed him, murmuring thanks.  When Drew had
passed, Evan turned to see where Drew sat. Stonily ignoring the
trio, he flopped down next to his brother Justin.

Evan had undressed to his briefs when he heard a soft knock.
The door opened and Troy stuck his head in.  "Darn - didn't wait
long enough.  I was hoping to catch you nekkid," he whined, with
a salacious inflection on the last word.

"I think you've seen all that before.  What's up?"

Troy came in shutting the door.  Evan sat on the end of the bed,
so Troy sat on the carpet.  "Dad, you noticed something going on
with Drew and Justin this evening.   I need some advice, but it
can't wait until morning."

"Okay.  Shoot."

"Susan, Cody and I were down in my bedroom having a group hug
and kiss after we'd put Riley to bed.  Justin had followed Cody
down.  When he saw us, he scooted back upstairs.  You noticed
that he's been avoiding us the rest of the evening.  He won't
even look at us."

"Yeah, I noticed.  So did Jeremy and Kenny."

"That's not all.  Drew's behaving the same way.  I don't think
he liked seeing Cody lean back on Susan's and my legs.  He
changed after that, pulling inside himself.  I can only imagine
what's going through Justin's and his mind, but I hoped you'd
help me see more clearly what they must be thinking."

"Okay. . . . You noticed that Justin attached himself to Cody,
and Drew stayed close to you most of the evening?" Evan asked.

"Yeah."

"Why do you think that is?"

"Cody thinks Justin's exhibiting hero worship.  I hope that's
all it is."  Evan shook his head in understanding.  "I mean, if
he's gay, it makes no difference to me, but I wouldn't wish it
for him.  If Cody and I weren't jocks, we'd probably be taking
more flack.  You know what I mean," Troy explained.

"Precisely."

"Maybe it's the same with Drew - hero worship, I mean."

"Count on it."

"So have I ruined it for them?"

"No-o-o-o," Evan said slowly.  "They've just entered puberty,
Troy.  Everything is discovery for them now, and everything is
confusing.  They are just trying to fit in a new life stage, so
they've latched onto Cody and you as models because they see
both of you fitting in big time.  You are popular with everyone.
You have monster reputations at school."  Even in only the light
of the lamp on the night table, Evan spotted a blush on Troy's
upper cheeks.  'Nice,' he thought. 'Still humble enough to be
embarrassed in the face of praise.'

"But that's also part of the problem," Evan continued.
"Socially, sexually, worldly-wise, you are experienced.  They
are not.  What both of them saw intimated at something deeper
among you three, something that they know is unconventional, so
it looks strange to them.  They don't know if it's okay to like
what they saw or not.  At their age, what seems strange can also
be threatening. There's no way they could escape feeling
confused and a little afraid.  They want to follow in your
footsteps, but they aren't certain that they CAN, let alone want
to follow Cody and you in what they've seen this evening.  A
second wrinkle is that you were demonstrating so much closeness
that they felt there was no room left for them.  In some way
they could never articulate, they felt shut out.  That's why
they've physically distanced themselves from you guys.  You shut
them out, so now they are shutting you guys out.  They're acting
out what they believe has already happened to them.

Evan paused.  "Before you go blaming yourself, you should know
that this evening's events were inevitable.  The more your
brothers shadow Cody and you, the more they are going to see -
up to a point.  You all know what that point is. In fact, the
glimpses Drew and Justin have had this evening are exactly what
you know you have to talk to them about this weekend.  You knew
it before they arrived.  Your being kicked out of your home was
too abrupt and startling for them not to have plenty of
questions with which to ply you."  Troy shook his head in
agreement.  "You are wise to seek counsel to avoid introducing
them to more than they can handle.  Do you begin to perceive how
they are feeling at this very moment?"

"Yes. . . . I started to talk to them right after they arrived,
but I realized that each one probably needs a different answer.
I don't want to send them home angry with Dad, at least not
because of something I've said.  They need to know that Dad gave
me no choice, but I don't want to cause more trouble there.
Susan, Cody, and I know we have to deal with this issue.  We
just aren't quite certain how to go about it."

"I've been thinking along the lines of your future with the
boys.  You are correct - you can't wait until morning to deal
with this issue.  Here's what I suggest. Tonight after your
guests have left, you and Cody need to ask Justin to accompany
you to the sunroom for a talk.  Susan needs to ask Drew to stay
with her in the family room for the same reason."

"What if they don't want to talk to us?"

"It's time for you to learn a master principle about human
nature.  If you act on this as often as possible, you'll find
yourself making better way with people, getting them on board,
leading them.  Whenever anyone proposes a venture, those to whom
it is offered must fairly quickly see a benefit to them if they
follow you.  Usually that benefit relates to themselves,
sometimes to an ideal, occasionally to both.  For you to be
effective, you need to let Drew and Justin know right up front
what that benefit is.  So when you announce these talks, tell
the boys that you have an offer to make them."

"What am I offering them?"

"Perhaps you missed the light in their eyes this evening when
Cody and you were alerting them to watch this play or that in
'Hoosiers.'  They loved it.  You were drawing them into Cody
and your world.  Drew will be in high school during your senior
year. If you and Cody work with him and Justin a lot this spring,
summer and fall, you may move from being the Varsity Twins to
the Varsity Triplets.  You've seen Drew play basketball.  I
haven't.  But if Cody can model his play after yours, so can
your brothers.  Maybe they share your basketball gene.  When
Cody and you graduate, Justin will be joining Drew in high school.
They may play so well as a duo then that they take the place of
Cody and you."

The more Evan explained his vision, the more Troy's eyes lighted
up and the bigger his smile got.  Evan laughed out loud.
"What?" Troy asked.

"Dave Hernandez will think he's gone to heaven when he has
triplets.  So will your team members . . . . OH!  Great idea!
After you four have been playing long enough to be somewhat in
sync, invite Dave to a Saturday pick-up game. He'll get a close
look at all of you.  You all can even invite him to coach you in
playing together.  Believe me, he won't see it as work!"

Troy laughed.  "I can see his eyes now as he becomes more aware
of the possibilities the future holds."

"Then after you talk to Justin, all of you go back and join
Susan and Drew and you can more fully explain the basketball
gambit."

"I'm not objecting, but why have Susan speak to Drew?"

"He's just old enough that he will hear her differently than
Justin.  Besides, Susan's involved in this evening's events.  It
would feel ambiguous to Drew and Justin if she didn't play a
role or have a voice in resolving the tension.  Susan's wise.
Drew's already wondering if he'll ever find a woman like her."

"Then tomorrow morning, you all head over to the basketball
courts at Borden Elementary a few blocks over.  You can play
together there.  And take Riley with you.  You don't want him to
feel cut out."

"But how can we play seriously if Riley's with us?"

"You choose Drew and Riley to be on your team.  Let Cody and
Justin play as a team.  When Riley gets the ball, you swoop over
and lift him up to the net.  Drew can do the same.  Riley will
love it!  You'll make him feel like a million dollars. As though
he could really be a basketball player like you.  All you guys
will bond in ways you never imagined.  Remember your early days
learning basketball?"

"Yeah."

"You'll be giving him better memories.  Riley will remember the
way his three brothers included him in their play, and he'll
bond with Cody the same way, which you would want, I believe."
Troy shook his head in the affirmative.  "But you will also
introduce Drew to what you expect of him with your brothers when
you aren't present."

"Oh, caught on to that, did you."

"Of course.

"Good plan, Dad.  I'll let you know how it works out," Troy
said, rising, walking over to Evan, pulling him into a hug, and
kissing him fervently.
				***

When Troy had arisen and walked to the front of the house, Drew
caught Jeremy's eye and nodded with his head toward Jeremy's
bedroom.  Jeremy squeezed Kenny's shoulder as he stood, following
Drew.  As he closed the bedroom door, Jeremy asked, "What's up,
Drew?  What can I do for you?" he asked as he gestured for Drew to
sit in the reading chair while he lay on his side on the bed, his
head propped in his hand.

"Mind if I ask you a personal question?"

Before Jeremy could answer, Kenny and Justin entered the room.
"Mind if we join you?" Kenny asked.  "I think Justin wants to
talk for the same reasons."

"I don't mind," Jeremy answered, sitting up and gesturing for
Kenny to sit beside him, throwing a long arm over Kenny's
shoulders.  Justin sat at Drew's feet.

"So?" Jeremy asked.

Drew and Justin exchanged a glance.  Drew took the lead.  "This
afternoon, you said Kenny is your boyfriend.  Do you mean a
friend who's a boy or a boyfriend like Susan is Troy's
girlfriend," Drew asked a little tentatively.

Jeremy looked at Kenny, who replied, "I'm Jeremy's boyfriend in
the same way that Susan is Troy's girlfriend.  We're in love
with each other.  Have been for a while now."

"Do you do the same stuff boys and girls do?" Justin asked.

"The same," Jeremy replied.

"You mean like kiss . . . and stuff?" Justin asked, his eyes
bigger.

"Yes," Jeremy answered softly.  "That's what people do when
they're in love."

"Don't you miss being with girls?" Drew asked.

"How could we miss being with girls when we get what we need and
want from each other?"

"We-e-e-e-l-l, does that mean you're gay?" Justin asked.

"Yes," Jeremy and Kenny both answered, turning to smile at the
other.

Kenny continued, "We didn't choose to be this way.  We have
known from a time when we were very young that we were
different, that we preferred males. Jeremy dated girls before.
I'd been in a relationship with an older guy, who decided he was
in love with a girl, so he dumped me.  I didn't handle it well,
but Jeremy was there to pick me up and offer me something
better."

"Are the guy and girl in your school?"  Drew asked.

"Yes."

"Who are they?" he persisted.

Kenny smiled.  "That's for them to say, not for me.  Besides,
they are very happy now.  I wouldn't do anything to ruin their
relationship.  That's not cool."

"Uh," Drew started cautiously, "are Troy and Cody
boyfriends?"

"You'd have to ask them," Jeremy iterated.  "They are the only
people to properly answer that question."

"Don't people hassle you?" Justin asked.

"Not usually," Jeremy answered.  "You've seen some of our
friends here this evening.  That isn't even half of them.  They
know about us.  They still consider us close friends, their
equals.  If we bother anyone else, they keep it to themselves,
and they don't become our friends."

"You're lucky to have parents who don't get on you about having
a boyfriend."

"Evan is my adopted father," Jeremy explained.  "My dad ran off
from my mom and me.  But when I introduced Kenny to Mom as her
future son-in-law, her boyfriend didn't like it, and I could
tell she didn't either.  I left.  They aren't my family anymore.
I'm not poorer because that happened.  Evan doesn't have a
problem with it."

"It sounds like what happened to you sort of happened to Troy
with our dad."

"Not with my parents," Kenny chimed in.  "They didn't' kick me
out.  It took a while for them to adjust to us, but they came
around."

"Is it awful to be gay?" Justin asked quietly.

"Is it awful to be heterosexual?" Jeremy asked, laughing.

"It can be if you aren't with a good woman or man, I bet," Drew
responded. "But . . . is sex good if you are gay?"

"Oh yeah," Jeremy and Kenny answered in concert, sharing a look.
The four laughed together.

"So how do you two feel now that you know about us?" Kenny
asked.

Drew and Justin looked at each other.  "I don't know what I
feel," Drew said.  "I don't hate you or anything like that.  I
like both of you.  I'm glad you're Troy's friends."

"Justin?" Jeremy asked.

"I'm okay with it.  I don't know if anyone I know at school is
gay or not.  Boy," Justin exclaimed, "it's a good thing our dad
isn't your father.  He's really . . . what's that word Mom used,
Drew?"

"Homophobic."

"Yeah," Jeremy responded, "I've seen your dad in action when he
came over here one night to take Troy home."

"Oh boy, was Mom ever mad at him when she heard what he did,"
Justin exclaimed.  "They went in their bedroom and had an
argument.  Then he was really mad when he heard we were spending
the weekend here with Troy.  But Mom . . . well, I don't know
. . . she calls the shots now.  She told Dad it was planned, it
was going to happen because he'd messed things up for all of us
being with Troy, and nobody wanted to hear anything more from
him about it.  Then she gave him one of those looks that told
him she meant it.  I've been afraid they'd split up, but they
haven't.  I don't know why."

"I've noticed that Dad is more careful around Mom," Drew
ventured.  "I've wondered if he's realized how unhappy he might
be if she dumped him.  Maybe he really misses Troy and is sorry
he kicked him out."  Jeremy just tilted his head to the left a
bit as though to say "maybe."

"Uh-h-h-h," Drew began, "do you guys like us even if we aren't
gay?"

"Of course," Jeremy and Kenny replied.  They all laughed.  "I
don't think we've ever answered as one voice so many times
together in one evening," Jeremy explained.  "You notice that
most of our friends are straight.  We love them just as much as
the gay ones.  Greg's gay, but Denton's straight.  They are
still friends.  When we meet people, our first reactions relate
to how friendly they are, not what their sexual orientation is.
That only makes a difference if you decide to allow it to make a
difference."

Silence ensued for a bit.  "Think we should get back to the
movie?" Kenny asked the group.  They arose, with Drew thanking
them for allowing them to ask personal questions.  When Justin
expressed no thanks, Drew shot him a sharp look.

"Oh yeah," Justin rushed to add, "thank you for explaining
things to us."
				***

Another movie later revealed the day's wear on the guests.  It
being after midnight, the guests began departing, for Saturday
and another evening of socializing lay ahead of them.  When the
last guest had left, Troy closed and locked the front door,
returning to the family room.  He'd quietly filled Susan and Cody
in on the talks he planned with his brothers.  Drew and Justin had
brought up their sleeping bags and were in the process of unrolling
them on the carpet.  "Hey, Justin, come on with me into the sunroom.
I'd like to talk to you for a minute."

Justin was on his knees on the floor, looking up at Troy, a
worried look on his face.  "I'm sorry, Troy.  I won't do it
again."  He paused.  "And I won't tell anyone."

"You're not in trouble, buddy.  I have an offer to make you."

"You do?"

"Come on," Troy nodded his head toward the sunroom.  Justin
arose rather slowly, following Troy just as slowly.  Cody fell
in behind Justin.

Drew had noted all that occurred but without letting on much
that he was paying much attention.  "Hey, Drew, this gives us a
chance to talk," Susan said.

Drew continued to unroll his sleeping bag and unzip it.  "Can't
think that we have much to talk about," Drew said, not looking
up.

"You think I haven't much to talk about with my future brother-
in-law?" Susan asked, finally winning Drew's eye.

"You and Troy are going to get married?"

"When we finish college."

"So Cody's not your boyfriend?"

"Cody is my boyfriend too.  As you saw, Troy and I both love
Cody, just as much as he loves us."

"You can't have two boyfriends at the same time," Drew
protested.

"Why not?" Susan asked.

Drew stared, the mental wheels and cogs turning.  "I don't know.
I just thought you could have only one at a time.  I don't know
anyone else who has two."

"Think a minute.  You mean there's no guy or girl at your school
who's involved with more than one boy or girl?"

"W-e-l-l, yeah, but I thought they were just playing around."

"You know how really close Troy and Cody have been over several
years.  Troy and I fell in love this year.  Then your brother
helped us understand that Cody and I love each other too.
Troy's very unusual that way, you know.  He has a kind and
loving heart, and when he loves someone, he loves them
completely. He felt that way for both Cody and me, so he wanted
us to love each other too. That's the way he is with his
brothers.  He loves each of you, and he wants you to join him in
his love for all of you by loving each other."

"Are Troy and Cody gay?"

"I'm going to allow Troy to answer that.  You know he loves you
very much, Drew.  He sees you following in his footsteps as a
scholar, jock, and leader.  He wants that very much.  That's why
he's been putting you in situations this weekend when you can
behave just as he would."

"Oh . . ." Drew paused, thinking.  "So that's why he's been so
pushy."

"Did you mind?" Susan asked.  "He never asked you to do anything
he hasn't done himself."

"How can he care about me when he's so close to Cody and you?"

"He has a big heart and lots of love to give.  He doesn't just
love us, you know. You saw all these people here this evening.
He collected them here because he wanted to show his brothers
off and he wanted you to meet them.  He knew some of them needed
to feel accepted and loved too.  You guys helped him accomplish
that."

Drew's eyes narrowed.  "You mean he was doing with them and us
what he did with you and Cody?"

"Much the same.  I doubt he expected you to get all mushy with
all of them the way you saw the three of us behave," Susan said,
her eyes twinkling mischievously.  They both laughed.

"Oh, I wouldn't have any trouble being mushy with Valerie or
Angela," Drew grinned.  "Or you," he said softly.

"Oh Drew, there will be many women who will want to be mushy
with you.  If what is reported to me is accurate, you are
already Number One on many women's lists in your school."

Drew blushed.  He waited for a while, looking at Susan, then
looking away, then back at her.  Susan knew there was a question
coming; Drew was just trying to figure out the best way to ask
it.  "Does Troy expect me to get mushy with guys they way he's
mushy with Cody?"

"No," she said softly.  "You know that's not Troy's way.  He's
not into forcing people to be anything.  His experiences with
your father would be enough to ensure that.  Your choice of a
partner for mushiness is yours alone."  They chuckled.

"But Troy's been telling me to do stuff all weekend."

"Drew, he's merely showing you how to walk in his footsteps."
She paused. "How long have you wanted to be just like Troy,
wanted people to think that you two are just alike?"

Pause.  "For a long time."

"That's what he's helping you do, Drew.  It's important to him.
He's proud of you and proud of what the two of you together can
be."

"No, he's got Cody now.  He won't care about that anymore."

"He's had Cody for years, Drew.  He didn't change toward you in
that time, did he?"

"I guess not."

"Then he won't now.  Besides, it's important to Cody that you
like him too.  You never realized that did you?"

Now Drew's mental cogs and gears were flying.  "Cody wants me to
like him? He acts like he doesn't care about anyone - except for
you and Troy anyway."

Cody wants to be as much like Troy as you do Drew.  You are
important to Cody because you are important to Troy.  He'd like
to have you as a brother too.  Can't you see that - Cody, Troy,
and you as a trio?  Then Justin and Riley too?"

Again, Drew was processing what he'd heard and realized.  "If
that's so, why did Justin get to go with Troy and Cody and they
left me here with you?"

"I think he thought you'd feel special being able to have a
visit with me," Susan said, posturing disappointment.

"Oh!" Drew exclaimed.  "Shit!  No . . . I'm sorry," he reached
out, tentatively touching Susan's arm.  "I shouldn't have used
that word.  But I didn't mean to say I didn't want to talk to
you, Susan.  I'm proud you're Troy's girlfriend."  He blushed.
"Oh-h-h-h, this is a mess. . . ."  He gulped.  "I'm glad we're
finally getting to have a talk, just the two of us.  I guess I
wanted to know why Troy cut me out of that talk."

"Justin saw Troy, Cody and I kissing and hugging each other this
evening down in Troy's bedroom just after we'd put Riley to bed.
They're explaining to Justin what I've just explained to you."

"Oh," he said, taking a while to absorb what Susan had told him.
"So why is Troy making an offer to Cody and not to me?"

"Oh, they'll join us shortly, and he'll make the same offer to
both of you."

Drew scooted over to Susan on his knees.  "May I hug you,
Susan?"

She stood as did Drew, who threw his arms around her.

"I KNEW it," Cody charged as he led Justin and Troy into the
family room. "Drew's trying to steal our woman, Troy.  What is
it with Morgan men?  Just can't keep their hands off the good
stuff."  The older three chuckled.  Drew colored.  Justin
gawked.

"Guys," Troy said.  "Would you loosen up a little?  It was a
joke!"

Drew and Justin finally smiled a bit.  Cody threw his arm around
Justin, pulling him against him.  "Yeah, Bro.  You're stiff as
the Tin Man in "The Wizard of Oz."

"Let's sit down and talk some more," Troy said.

The boys sat on the carpet.  Troy nudged Cody toward Susan, who
smiled as he sat beside her on the sofa, throwing his arm across
her shoulders and claiming a little kiss.  Troy sat down by his
brothers.

"Here's the offer, guys.  Cody and I want to coach you guys in
basketball.  We want to start practicing as a team so that you
can learn from us and we can learn to play well with you.
Eventually, we hope we'll be playing as a unit.  When you arrive
at Templeton High next year, Drew, you'll be a star on junior
varsity. Who knows?  Maybe you'll develop so fast you'll get
some playing time on varsity with Cody and me."  Drew's eyes
grew just as large as Troy had imagined they would.

"Me too?" Justin asked.  "You too, Bro," Cody said.  "When you
join Drew at Templeton, you'll take our places as "the Twins."
Drew and Justin shot smiles at each other.

"When do we start?" Justin asked.

"Tomorrow morning," Tory said.  "We'll go over to the ball
courts at Borden Elementary and shoot some baskets.  We'll take
Riley too."

Drew groaned softly.  "Oh Troy, why do we have to take Riley?
He's such a pain in the ass.  He'll just slow us down."

Troy's eyebrows rose questioningly.  "Did you know that there
was once a big brother who thought his next younger brother was
a pain in the ass.  He was always following him around.  Always
wanting to shoot baskets with him.  Know who that was?"

Drew shook his head in the negative.

"You."

Drew just stared at Troy, who continued.  "I finally realized
that you didn't want to crimp my style.  You wanted to be with
me.  You loved me.  You wanted to learn from me.  Right."

Drew blushed lightly.  "Yeah."

"Think that's why Riley is the way he is with Justin and you?"

The two younger brothers swapped looks, their eyes rolling.

"Troy," Justin said, "Drew and I were never like Riley.  I've
never gotten in someone's face like I was daring them to ignore
me."  Cody grinned, sharing his amused moment with Troy and
Susan, all realizing that Justin could be describing Cody.

"But don't you see that your very words explain why Riley's that
way?" Cody asked.

"Huh?"

"Drew," Troy added, "you never had to compete with anyone since
you were nearer in age to me.  Justin, you had only to compete
with Drew, but you guys are different enough that you really
weren't competition for each other.  Look where Riley is in
birth order.  Look how many years separate you.  Can't you see
why he has to be that way not to be ignored and run over?  Don't
you admire him just a little bit for deciding he's not going to
be overlooked?  I do.  No one ignores Riley Morgan.  And have
you noticed how he can hold his own with us and adults too -
better than you two, actually.  In fact, there will come a time
when you two will have to hustle to compete with him.  That is
one strong fella. He'll only grow to be more so."

Drew snickered.  "You don't mean he'll be beating up bullies
who'll be picking on Justin and me do you?"  The two brothers
laughed at the thought.

"One never knows," Troy almost sang, wagging his eyebrows.
"Guys, we are blessed with this brother," Troy explained.  "Be
proud of him. Protect and help him.  He confers presence on us.
He'll look up to you for it, idolize you for it.  That's what
big brothers are obliged to do, you know - if they are the right
kind of men, that is."

Troy allowed his words to soak in.  "But how can Riley play ball
with us?" Justin asked.  "He's too small."

"Then we have to keep his size from counting against him.  Evan
had an idea. He suggested that when we toss Riley the ball, we
hold him up toward the basket and let him shoot.  Can't you see
that little imp's eyes the first time that ball goes through the
net?"  Drew and Justin laughed.  "You will have put that light
there, guys.  That's one of the most decent acts anyone of us
can achieve in any day. Imagine how we'll be helping our brother
feel about himself.  Don't you want to do that for him?"

"W-e-l-l," Drew drawled, "I guess it won't be so bad.  Just as
long as you guys are helping us too."

"You don't know how much we want to do that," Cody stated.

"Guys," Troy said, "I want your promise that you'll do a better
job of being big brothers to Riley.  I want you to love him.
I'll warn you now that I'll have a hard time with you if you
can't love and help him."

Both Drew and Justin looked somber.  "I'm not kidding," Troy
said, looking at them without a smile or any positive signal.
Silence ensued.  Drew and Justin looked at each other and then
at Troy.

"You want an answer?" Drew asked.  Troy just stared at them
levelly.  A check of Susan's and Cody's faces made Drew and
Justin realize that they had reached a serious moment with the
three.  "You really mean it?"  No one said anything. Drew
gulped.  "I have always loved Riley.  I guess I've never tried
to fit him in my world much.  I'll improve, Troy," he said as he
looked pleadingly at Troy.  "I promise."

"Me too," Justin said.

"Not good enough, Justin," Troy said.

Justin looked at Drew, but he found no support there.  "You mean
I have to say something more?" Justin asked.

Silence.

"Oh, okay, I get it."  Justin thought a moment.  "Sometimes I
admire Riley.  He's just there, holding his own with everyone
when I'm shy.  I've never seen anyone back him down much.
Sometimes he gives Dad a hard time.  I guess he reminded me too
much that I'm the next youngest when I wanted to be seen as
older.  You've made me realize that I am an older brother.  I'll
be that for Riley from now on.  I promise."

"That's what I needed to hear, guys," Troy said, shooting them a
killer smile full of warmth and love.

Silence ensued.  "Troy," Drew began.  "Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot," Troy said.  Drew hesitated, shooting a glance at Cody,
who realized just then what was coming.  "I don't want to make
you or anyone mad."

"Don't worry about it," Troy reassured his younger brother.
"We're family here."

Drew waited so long that Troy was beginning to think he might
have to ask the question himself.  "Are you and Cody in love
with each other?" Drew asked.

Justin breathed a sigh of relief.  Startled by his reaction, he
said softly, "Sorry." They all realized that Justin had wanted
to ask the same question.

"May I answer that?" Cody asked Troy, who smiled.

"Go ahead."

"Yes, Troy and I love each other.  It happened naturally.  We
never set out to make it happen.  It just did."

"Does that mean you love each other the way Kenny and Jeremy
do?" Justin asked.

"How do you know about that?" Troy asked.

"We had a talk with them this evening?" Drew explained.

"Really," Troy said, his eyebrows arched in surprise.  "Neat!
You guys took the initiative to resolve an issue for yourselves.
I'm proud of you.  I assume you didn't offend Jeremy and Kenny
just as you haven't offended us this evening?"

"Naw," Drew said.  "We left friends.  We still like each other."

"So do you love each other the way they do?" Justin asked,
looking at Cody.

"Yes," Troy answered.

Drew cleared his throat, looking at Susan.  "But doesn't that
hurt you, Susan?"

"No," she answered smiling to reassure Drew that he hadn't
trespassed on her feelings.  "It makes them love me all the
more.  I'm not jealous if you are wondering about that.  When a
woman has such two handsome, decent, caring men loving her, she
hasn't time to be jealous.  Cody takes nothing from Troy and me.
It's the same for all three of us.  It wouldn't be possible if
we didn't truly love each other.  I'm glad when Troy and Cody
make love.  Troy is happy when Cody and I make love.  We admit
that we're unique, but that's the way it is."

Troy and Cody shook their heads in agreement.  "Guys," Troy
began, "it goes without saying that this is a family matter,
just among all of us.  Mom knows. Dad should never know.  And
it's not other people's business either.  This is just for
family."

Justin stifled a laugh.  "Who would think we would tell Dad?
He'd be mad at us because you wouldn't be there to be mad at.
But what did Mom say?"

"She's okay with it."

"What about Riley?" Drew asked.

"He'll catch onto it gradually," Troy said.  "He's sharp.  But
we shouldn't spring it on him now.  Agreed?"

Drew and Justin shook their heads in agreement.

				***

In the morning when Troy awakened, Riley was snuggled up against
him with his head on Troy's shoulder and his arm thrown across
Troy's chest.  Troy smiled, feeling a little boner poking his hip.

As Troy slowly ran his hand in circles over Riley's back, he
gradually awakened, finally hugging Troy tightly.  In a little
boy voice that threatened to break Troy's heart, Cody exclaimed,
"I miss you Troy.  When can you come back home?"

"I know you miss me, Bro.  I miss you tons.  If I could manage
it, we wouldn't be apart, but it's not my call.  You know that -
right?

"Why, Troy?  Why can't we live together?"

Troy thought for at least a minute about how to answer that
question so that Riley wouldn't be hurt.  Finally he spoke.
"Bro, there's not much I can say on that point.  I've got to
answer in the best way for you.  That means you probably won't
understand.  But if you trust and love me, you'll understand a
little.  It just isn't going to happen now.  You're beginning to
learn that no one can make things work out perfectly all the time.
The older you are, the more you see that happen.  But I promise
you, when you're older, we'll change all this shit," Troy said
with more vehemence than he intended.

"How long?" Riley asked.

"When you're 18, you're your own man," Troy replied. He heard
Riley whimper. He was touched that he stood so high in Riley's
estimation that Riley could let down his guard and be a whiny
little brother with him.  "Hey, Bud.  It won't be that bad.
You're my man.  I love you, Riley," Troy said, clasping him
tightly. "You know that.  Right?"

"Right," Riley gasped.  Realizing how tightly he was hugging
Riley, Troy shifted to running his hands over Riley's back
again.  Riley raised his head to look into Troy's eyes.  "Do you
love Susan more than you love me?"

"No, I love you equally.  My loving Susan or Drew or Justin
doesn't take anything away from you.  You know why?"  Riley
shook his head in the negative.  "Because the name of each of
you is written on my heart, but it's written in its own place.
You want to see?"

Riley just stared at Troy, and then shook his head rapidly.
"Okay, now remember, your name is written in small letters on my
heart, so it's not really easy to feel, but if you concentrate
really hard, you'll feel it.  Let me find it first." Troy ran
his hand over a spot just to the left of his sternum.  He felt
around for a while as Riley watched in rapt attention.  "Here it
is," Troy almost sang.  "Here, sit on the bed beside me and give
my your hand.  Riley sprang up, sitting Indian style by Troy.
He held out his little hand, dwarfed by that of his oldest
brother. Troy placed his hand over Riley's little hand with his
index finger against Riley's index finger.

"Now remember, you won't feel it at first.  You have to focus
your mind and heart on this spot where your hand is.  Heart has
to meet heart.  Ready?"  Riley shook his head eagerly.  Troy
started moving Riley's fingers in micro circles. "Okay, now
close your eyes and focus your mind and heart on this spot."
Riley shook his head, clasping his eyes tightly shut.  Troy
continued to rub Riley's fingers gently over the spot.  "You
should be feeling it now.  I'm feeling it with my finger.  It
won't be big.  It will be tiny.  Do you feel something small and
raised down under the skin?"  He rubbed over the spot two more
times.  "Tell me if you do cause I'm feeling it now."

"Yeah, I feel it," Riley whispered.

"Okay, let's spell it out," Troy said.  "R . . . I . . . L . . .
E . . . Y.  What does that spell?"

The little fella's eyes popped open.  "That's my name!" Riley
exclaimed.

"See why you will never lose my love, why I'll always love you?"
Troy asked.

Eyes wide, Riley shook his head in the affirmative.  Troy pulled
him down into a hug.  "Is Dad's name there?" Riley asked.

Troy frowned.  "Yes, but it isn't glowing in gold like yours."

"It's Dad, isn't it?" Riley asked.  "You're not coming home
because of Dad."

"You know," Troy replied.  They were quiet for a while.  "Hey
Riley, I need your help."

Riley raised his head, looking into Troy's eyes.  "We need to
support Drew and Justin as they grow into leaders and into your
older brothers.  Can you help me?"

Riley paused before answering.  "Yeah, but I don't know about
that stuff, leadership, I mean.  Besides, they don't have time
for me.  I'm just a little kid to them."

"Oh, little man, you know a lot more about leadership than you
think.  Among all us Morgan boys, you'll probably be a leader as
strong as Terminator."

Riley thought a moment.  "Terminator I or Terminator II?"

Troy chuckled.  "Terminator II.  But you won't meltdown at the
end.  One of the reasons I love you Riley is that you are
awesome."

"Me?'

"Yeah, you!"

Riley hugged Troy tighter.  "I just want to be like you, Troy.
I want to be with you more."

"OH!" Troy exclaimed.  "Oh . . . oh . . . this is brilliant!"
Riley's head had shot up off Troy's chest, his eyes big.

"What?"

"When you need a Troy fix and I need a Riley fix, all we have to
do is tell Mom. We'll arrange for you to come here to stay all
night with me.  I can give you a ride to school in the morning.
Drew and Justin don't have to be free for you to come over here.
It'd be just you and me.  How about that?"

"I LIKE IT!" Riley exclaimed, hugging Troy yet again.

				***

Far sooner than anyone wished, late Sunday morning arrived.  The
boys had slept in, for they had had a full day Saturday,
starting with basketball at Borden Elementary.  Riley had
returned, lighted up like a Christmas tree, bubbling over about
baskets he'd made during their game.  As he related the details
to Evan, Drew had picked him up, holding him so that Riley was
as tall as everyone else. Buddy-like, Riley had put his arm
around Drew's neck.  Susan had come over for lunch, which she
and Evan prepared.  They'd sat around the dining room table
listening to the morning's sport exploits.  All during lunch,
the phone had been ringing as friends were trying to coordinate
the evening's activities.  Though invited to join them, Evan
had begged off, thinking that the Morgans needed their time free
from him.  After dinner at Francini's, Troy and crew met the usual
circle of friends, who were taking the younger Morgans to view "The
Lord of the Rings," which had made quite an impression on Justin
and Riley.  When Evan heard the crowd returning home, he'd gone
to open the front door.  Drew was the first to arrive on the
porch, holding a sleeping Riley in his arms, smiling indulgently
down at his sleeping brother.  The gathering settled in the
family room, but it lasted only until after midnight.  A late
breakfast on Sunday morning was subdued.  None of them - even
Evan - wanted it to end.  Finally, Emily's knock on the door put
a period on the weekend.

Evan invited Emily in to the dining room to sit with everyone
while she had a cup of tea.  Drew and Justin excitedly imparted
Troy and Cody's plan for coaching the boys in basketball.
Riley's eyes glowed as he told his mother about Troy and Drew
holding him up to the basket so that he could shoot.  He'd even
made ten points!  She watched as Justin patiently cut Riley's
sausage into bite-sized pieces, inquiring if Riley wanted more
orange juice.  She also noticed how Riley thanked Justin with a
smile following.  She noticed how Troy was surreptitiously
monitoring the behavior, shooting Justin a wink and a smile as
he cared for Riley.

When they left, Drew was carrying a giggling Riley piggyback out
the door.  As Emily was shepherding her charges out of the
living room, Troy asked her if Riley could come stay all night
with him sometimes.  A lot of silent communication passed
between them.  Emily readily agreed, promising that she'd speak
to Troy by phone about it.  She thanked Troy and Evan profusely,
remarking that she could already see benefits in the boy's
behavior.

After they had departed, Troy pulled Evan into a hug, just
standing there, swaying from side to side.  "Oh Evan, this was
such a healing weekend.  Thank you for allowing everyone to pile
in on us.  He reached out with a long arm and pulled Jeremy and
Kenny into the embrace.  "Guys, this weekend filled a hole
inside of me.  I owe each of you so much for making this
happen."
				***

All day Thursday before Tim Minor's big professional development
conference in the city, Evan found himself shaking his head, trying
to clear it of images and thoughts of Tim.  What was disturbing was
that they weren't just images of Tim - they were images of Tim and
Ron.  Evan found himself imagining the two joining together as
they had in college, wondering if that would happen again. 'Now
where in the world are these thought coming from,' he wondered.
'Well,' he told himself, 'you yourself are evidence that Tim
won't turn down a fuck if he can have one.'   Then he snorted in
impatience at himself, wondering why he was being such an ass,
why he was obsessed with Tim's presence in the city, angry with
himself for not exerting more self-control, fearful of the
implications of his not being able to let go of the past.  He
knew it was a measure of his feeling majorly threatened.  As a
result, he out of sorts with himself.

By the time classes ended, Evan was in a state.  He really
wanted to be alone.  He decided he'd dine out.  That would give
him some solitude for thinking.  Without really paying
attention, once he drove out of the school's north parking lot,
he unwittingly turned in the direction of Francini's Italian
Restaurant.  He was so distracted about Tim that he didn't
realize he'd been on automatic pilot until he turned into the
restaurant's parking lot.  'Damn', he chided himself,
remembering an occasion just before Christmas after Tim had
dumped him.  'What if Mary Ellen Branson brings the whole
Science Department here again?'  But a moment's thought brought
a smile to his face.  Tim would be at the Radisson downtown,
deep into last minutes details of the conference, probably
having drinks and dinner with bigwigs from the region.  Evan was
probably safe here tonight.

Evan alighted from the car, walking to the entrance.  He
strolled up to the hostess.  "Hello Mr. Halsey."  Evan returned
the greeting.  "Let me get Tony or Angela."

"That's not necessary," Evan replied with a smile.  "Orders,"
she replied, smiling.  Evan's eyebrows rose slightly.

Before long Tony walked up to the hostess's podium, but he
didn't return Evan's smile and greeting.  Evan's brow furrowed.
"Evan, Ron is here," Tony stated.

"Oh?" said Evan.

"With Tim Minor."

Evan's face set.  Hesitating only a moment, he turned and shot
out the door. Angela noticed Tony standing in the foyer, a towel
he'd used to wipe tables wadded up in his hand, resting on his
hip, his head down, his body caught up in dejection.  She joined
Tony,  "What's wrong, Tony?"

"I just had to tell Evan Halsey that Ron Hamilton and Tim Minor
are here together," he answered grimly.

"Oh, no," Angela whispered.  "How did Evan react?"

"Ran," Tony replied crisply.  "I'm getting tired of being sucked
into these black holes in Evan's life," he groused.

Angela's eyes widened.  "What do you mean?"

"Why is it that when something bad happens to Evan, I always
have to be on the scene?"

"That sounds mean.  You don't want to be around Evan?"

"No, not that," Tony replied in exasperation.  "I'd like to be
with him when something good is happening, not bad stuff."
Angela's jaw dropped a bit, and she looked accusatorily at Tony.
"I know what you're thinking," Tony muttered. "You're thinking
that I did the same thing to him when we had lunch and that
weird conversation at school."

"So what have you done to set matters right?" Angela asked.

"I've hugged him, visited with him, joked with him," Tony said
defensively.

"Tony, do you think everything can be fixed with a hug, a joke,
and shooting the breeze?" Angela asked.

Tony looked at her levelly.  He knew he wasn't going to get by
without an answer.  Angela could be tenacious when she wanted to
make a point.  "No."

"So when Evan sees you, what do you think fills his mind?"

"The last time we were together in that weird conversation. . .
. I know, I know, you made me realize back then what he's
feeling.  But I don't know what to say to him.  And then
tonight's mess with Ron and Tim may make him think I was wanting
him to leave."

"Did you say anything to reassure him?"

"I didn't have a chance.  He shot out of here like a bullet."

Angela stuck her chin out and put her hands on her hips.  "Well,
Tony, what are you going to do about it?  I've never seen you
wimp out ever, but that's what you've been doing since that
lunch with Evan.  It's time to suck it up and deal with this
issue."  Then she flounced off.

'I guess I better think of something to do,' Tony thought to
himself, recognizing that Angela's corner was going to be cooler
for him until he could report that he'd resolved the issue with
Evan successfully.
				***

Once again, Evan found himself in his car on autopilot.  His mind
was a welter of images and emotions.  It seemed that most of his
neurotic wrestling over Ron and Tim was justified.  Man, did he feel
low.  'Why is it,' he asked himself, 'that when something like this
happens, I want to turn and run?'  No answer was forthcoming.
After a couple of minutes, he decided he'd better find someplace
else to eat.  At first, he couldn't think of anyplace other than
a fast food restaurant, which offered no appeal.  Then he
remembered the cafeteria where Ron and he used to eat before
basketball games.  That was the place!  Quick meal.  Left alone.
Then home to bury himself in sleep.

When he parked in the cafeteria's parking lot, he was still
preoccupied.  He walked into the cafeteria and down the aisle to
the trays, silverware, and servers, looking neither right nor
left.

He went through the line, making his choices like a robot.  At
the cash register, he was waiting for his change, when he felt a
hand on his shoulder.  He turned about, surprised to find Jim
Belton smiling at him.  "Jim!" Evan exclaimed.

"Hey, Evan," Jim smiled.  "Come sit with Miles and me."  Evan
looked around the cafeteria, spotting Miles at a table in a
corner.  Miles waved him over.  "Oh, I don't know," Evan
muttered.  "Looks like I'd be interrupting something planned.
Are you guys on your way to a ballgame?"

"Yeah, have you forgotten that Templeton High plays Pratt High
tonight?  Come to think of it, I didn't see you at the spirit
rally today."

"Huh?" Evan asked.  Jim waited.  "Oh, I guess my mind was so
full of stuff that I forgot," Evan replied softly.  Jim noted
Evan's defeated look.

"Come on.  Miles and I want to talk to you.  We won't take 'no'
for an answer," Jim replied with some determination.

Seated some distance away, Miles was studying the two men at the
cash register. 'Wonder what's up now?  Evan's hardly eager to
join us.  Something's wrong,' Miles thought, his elbows on the
table, watching Jim turn and take a few steps toward their
table, then turn back to see if Evan was following.  He wasn't,
so Jim waved Evan forward.  Evan slowly moved out.  When they
reached the table, Miles stood while Evan set his tray down,
then held out his hand.  Evan grasped it and shook it
perfunctorily, but Miles wouldn't let Evan's hand go, making
Evan look into his eyes.  Miles smiled, squeezing Evan's hand in
reassurance.

"Evan forgot about the ballgame, Miles," Jim said.  "His mind is
on some other planet, I think.  This game with Pratt," Jim said,
turning to Evan, "is a big one for Templeton.  So what's pulled
you out of this universe?" Jim asked as they all seated
themselves.  Evan placed his napkin in his lap and took a drink
of coffee, again preoccupied.

"Evan?" Miles asked.

Evan sighed in defeat.  "I went to Francini's to have dinner,
but Ron and Tim Minor are there."

Jim and Miles traded glances.  "What's Tim Minor doing here?"
Miles asked neutrally in his lawyerly way.

"Oh yeah," Jim exclaimed.  "I'd forgotten that he was to be here
for that conference."  Jim quickly filled Miles in on Tim's new
position and the nature of the conference.

"So what are you going to do?" Miles asked.

Evan looked down at his plate.  "Not a damned thing except go
home and lose myself in sleep," he said.  Both Miles and Jim
could hear charged emotions just under Evan's words.

				***

Ron decided that he didn't want to wait in the foyer of Francini's
Restaurant for Tim to show up for dinner.  He didn't want it
even remotely to appear that he was dancing attendance upon Tim.
After giving the hostess Tim's name, Ron asked to be seated at a
booth and ordered a drink.  For several reasons, he wasn't
feeling very good about this dinner.  He hadn't mentioned to
Evan that Tim was coming to town and that the two would
inevitably see each other.  He wasn't certain how Evan would
take it - probably badly.  He couldn't blame him, but there was
no point in putting Evan in a stew for days.  Still, now that he
looked at it from Evan's perspective, he had probably made a
mistake.  If Evan learned of it, their dinner would appear
clandestine, sneaky.  He could too easily guess what fires
Evan's demons would light in his imagination.

Weeks earlier, Ron had been surprised to find the "Call Back"
slip with Tim's name and number in his faculty mail box.  He'd
known about the conference, but he really hadn't planned to get
together with Tim.  Memories of his return phone call filled his
mental field.

"Hi Tim.  It's Ron Hamilton, returning your call."

"Hey, buddy.  Thanks for calling me back.  Have you heard about
the professional development conference at the Radisson in your
fair city?"

"Yes, Mary Ellen Branson is quite high about it.  I think you're
a hero of hers now."  Feeling mischievous, Ron added, "You could
probably have your way with her any time you wanted."

Tim snorted in contempt.  "So are you going to the conference?"

"Oh yeah.  Mary Ellen has approved substitutes for us on Friday.
In fact, if one of us didn't attend, his neck would be ready for
a noose."

"Gee, thanks.  It's nice to know you really want to benefit from
this conference," Tim replied sarcastically.

"No, don't get me wrong," Ron hastened to reassure him.  "I
think connecting teachers to the real workplace is an important
concept.  I'm all for it.  I answered as I did to let you know
that I was definitely going to attend."

"Good.  You won't be sorry.  I called to see if we could have
dinner the Thursday evening before the conference starts on
Friday.  I'd like to talk to you.  And I'd like to get away from
the hotel since I'll be spending the entire weekend into Monday
there.  I have good staff who'll be taking care of the
conference details. Any chance we could do dinner?"

Ron had to screen his reluctance from his voice.  "Yes.  When
and where?"

"How about Francini's.  Early, say 4:30 for a drink and dinner
after.  Then I have to get back to the hotel."  So they'd
arranged to meet.

As Ron sat there, nursing his drink, the hostess stopped by his
booth with Tim following.  He looked good.  If anything, he
carried himself with more assurance as though he were a person
of consequence.  Ron guessed that, in fact, Tim was now just
that.  He looked hotter too.  "Hey, Buddy," Tim said, holding
out his hand.  Ron shook it.  Tim gave their waiter his drink
order.

"You're looking very good," Ron said, "fit, authoritative,
happy, I hope."

"Oh yeah," Tim replied.  "Sometimes I have to pinch myself to
believe everything that's happened to me.  I like life in your
former city.  My job has really grown, as you probably know.
This conference will start a movement that will produce major
benefits not just for teachers but also for their students and
the workplace."

"I'm already sold," Ron replied, smiling.  "You still hooked up
with the legislator?"

"Yeah, as hooked up as we'll ever be."  Tim hesitated only a
moment.  "Which is as hooked up as I ever NEED to be," he said,
blushing slightly, looking down at his menu.  "Maybe I'm not put
together right," Tim admitted.  "Whatever I lack, this
arrangement is perfect.  I love Brandon Parker, and he loves me.
Really!" Tim exclaimed.

"I never doubted your capacity to love," Ron stated softly.  "I
believed you'd never be able to love enough or long enough."

Tim pursed his lips.  "You know me too well."

"Which is why you dumped me," Ron added.

Tim finally looked Ron straight in the eyes.  "I am different,
Ron.  I still care for you enough to be honest with you even if
it makes me look like a cad."  Tim looked away.  "I wanted to
love you as much as I could.  I really did," his eyes swung back
to Ron's.  "You're a dream.  Probably don't even know how much
guys lust after you.  But you know - I ran out of fear.  It was
nothing to do with you.  You were perfect - hot, honest, true,
loving, exciting."  He rubbed his sweaty palm up and down the
leg of his slacks.  "What I'm angry at myself about is not
saying anything to you, letting you think you were at fault."
He paused. "That was due to weakness on my part.  Please accept
my apologies.  I treated you badly.  I'm ashamed for it to this
day.  You deserved better from me because you gave me better."
He waited.  "Please, Ron, would you be able to say that you
forgive me?"

Ron studied Tim, looking deeply into his eyes, seeing how much
he'd actually changed internally.  "Yes, I forgive you. . . .
Why such a change?"

Tim shrugged his shoulders.  "Job, time, future, especially
Brandon, who is a fine man and a wonderful lover.  But he keeps
me honest with him.  Told me right up front that I was what he
was looking for - a good fuck buddy who wouldn't demand more of
him than he or his political and social position could allow.
But we've moved more deeply into each other since then.  We talk
about it a lot.  I told him about you."  Tim looked away.  "And
others."

"Does this change of heart," Ron asked, "include only me or
others?"

Tim groaned.  "Let's end this pain.  Why don't you just say
'Evan'"?

"Well?" Ron insisted.

"You know it includes Evan too.  Alan as well except that both
of us knew our relationship was an interim arrangement.  Other
than Brandon, Evan and you are the best things that ever
happened to me."  He gulped down part of his drink. "Evan was
dangerous - so needy with his injury but needy on a deeper level
too. And there was cute Jeremy as a son.  A lot of things I'd
always secretly dreamed about having.  I was being sucked in too
quickly, too much.  It scared the hell out of me."

"You hurt Evan, Tim," Ron replied quietly but pointedly.  "Hurt
him badly. Letting him find out about Alan from his students.
Not explaining anything. Taunting him.  Freezing him out of the
going-away party for you.  And then setting it up to look like
Evan stiffed you.  You merely quit talking to me,
leaving me to my own conclusions.  But you went out of your way
to punish Evan.  He never hurt you at all.  But you punished
him!" Ron said with ever increasing vehemence.  He was aware
that his protective side had kicked in because he loved Evan.

Tim shook his head, elevating his hand slightly from the
tabletop as though to stop Ron from advancing.  "I know, I know.
I was fighting the guilt I was feeling about running from him.
I hated myself actually, which made me mistreat Evan and Alan.
I don't know - maybe I thought if I treated Evan shabbily
enough, made him angry enough, he'd stomp off in a huff after
saying something hurtful to me.  Then my behavior would be
justified and I could leave town with a clear conscience.  Of
course, he didn't do that. I've beaten myself up many times over
my treatment of him.  As wrong as it was, I found myself doing
the same with Alan."  Tim ducked his head, then looked back at
Ron.  "I arranged for Alan to catch Brandon and me in bed.  He
moved out immediately.  Brandon was pissed that I'd used him
that way, which started a bunch of questions about Evan. When I
answered them, he hopped out of bed and gave me a tongue-lashing
I'll never forget.  Then he dressed and stormed out.  He
wouldn't see me for a week. I was really afraid I'd lost him.  I
know - the irony isn't lost on me.  Brandon was making me feel
what I made you three guys feel.  And others," he said softly.

"So?" Ron asked.

"When I left your message, I left a message for Evan to call me,
but he never did. I didn't think he would."

There was only a brief pause before Tim asked, "Is Evan
attending the conference?"

"I don't really know," Ron replied.  "I haven't talked to him
recently."

"What's wrong?" Tim asked.  "I thought you two were a couple."

"Well . . . we've taken a time out, I guess you'd say."

"Time out?  Why?" Tim asked, vexation apparent in his voice.

"We realized that we were relating only on a sexual level.  We
wanted more, but we realized we'd have to start at 'Go' to get
on the right footing.  That's where we are now."  The two diners
were so intent in their conversation that they didn't notice
Tony Francini standing in the doorway to the dining room,
observing them closely.

"So do you see each other often?"

Ron had paused.  "Not often."

"Damn it, Ron!" Tim exclaimed, sitting up ramrod straight.  "I
really maneuvered to get you two together, and then you let it
fall apart.  Your being a couple was important to me.  I was
trying to make up to you what I'd done to each of you," Tim
said, his anger thinly veiled.

"Oh come off it," Ron said just as angrily.  "Why'd you send
your buddy Randall after us with that sex slave ploy."  Off to
the side, Tony concentrated on them as their gestures vigorously
punctuated their words.  He recognized a quietly controlled
argument occurring.

"It was a stroke of genius!" Tim replied.  "I knew if you two
were flagging, Randall would drive you closer together.  And he
did.  Right?"

"Right," Ron said with some resignation.  The waiter arrived to
take their dinner orders, which allowed them some cooling off
time.

When the waiter left, Tim asked with a little attitude, "So is
it over with you two?"

"I hope not," Ron stated emphatically.  "I love Evan, Tim.  I
can't imagine not having him in my life.  Every little thing we
discover about each other adds to our love.  At the right point,
we'll cement our bond with sex.  I won't allow that to happen
until the moment is right.  I want this to last forever.  So you
see, you didn't fail.  Evan and I are just on our own timetable,
not anybody else's.  We've got a couple of buddies who are
supporting us, Miles Frobisher, Evan's attorney, and Jim Belton.

"Jim, the janitor!  Is Jim gay?"

"Yes," Ron said smiling.  "Miles and Jim are a great couple."

"I'd heard through the grapevine that Jim had divorced, but I
didn't know it would lead to this.  I'm glad that they're your
buddies.  You make me envious. Buddies are something that
Brandon and I can't have. Too risky for him."  Tim looked off
into space for a few seconds.  "It would be so great to have a
couple of guys we could pal around with, socialize with.  But we
even have to be careful about how many times we are seen in
public together.  No more times than a citizen would expect a
legislator who's a champion of education and a state education
official to have reason to talk.  That's not enough times for
us.  Usually then we meet at my condo," Tim related somewhat
wistfully.  He was absorbed in thought for a bit.  "Once I flew
to New York to join Brandon at a conference.  It was wonderful,
Ron.  For a few days, we could let down our guard and be two
guys in love without much fear of being observed."  Then Tim
suddenly shook his head as though to send thoughts or images in
flight.  "For the first time ever in my life, maybe, I have to
be happy with what I have.  I don't want to run."

The waiter brought their meals, which they started in silence.
"Ron, I want to talk to Evan.  It seems that he won't come to
me, so I'll have to go to him.  I've got to tell you, I'd rather
enter a cage of lions than go see Evan.  Any suggestions?"

"As you correctly guessed, Evan won't come anywhere near you.
You'll have to go to him.  Visit him at his home, not the
school.  Tell him exactly what you felt about him and exactly
why you had to step out of the relationship.  I believe he's
already figured it out.  Given the history of his relationships,
he'll think you dropped him because there's something wrong with
him.  Your punishing him pretty much confirmed that in his mind.
Now you have to reverse that damage. There's no way you will
sound genuine if you hold back or protect yourself.  Be as
honest with him as you have been with me."

(To be continued.)

Maybe this posting so proximate to Valentine's Day will make
Chapter 40 seem like an expression of appreciation for the
readers of "Ambush."  You wouldn't be incorrect in that
impression.