Date: Mon, 2 Mar 2015 17:03:40 -0700 From: Ken Duxbury <kenduxbury52@gmail.com> Subject: His Twin, Authoritarian This story is being written as I am starting to come full circle in life. It involves legal, consent aged men, with titles (such as Sir/boy) denoting Dominant or submissive persons. SOME of the names have been changed, as to protect identities of the guys that I know will read this. Some haven't, as I doubt it really matters. As for the events: Some of it is absolute truth. Some of it is fantasy. Some of it is the truth with sugar frosting. Some of it is happening now, and some of it has happened in the past. Some of it has not and will not happen. That, I shed tears over, but such is life. This isn't just for the reader's enjoyment, it's for my enjoyment as well. I'm finally having the time of my life again after so many years, and a word of advice to younger readers: accept who you are. If you're just an average run of the mill gay guy, be happy with that and be happy with life. It's who you are. If you're a Dominant Alpha Male, be happy with that. If you're a submissive male, be happy with that. Again, that's who you are. Don't waste your life worrying about what your friends and family will think. If they love you, they won't care. Recognize yourself early. Trust me, when you reach your middle age, you will not have a regret if you do. This work is not to be recreated or copied without approval from me, the author, Kenneth P Duxbury, and the usual legal mumbo jumbo applies – if you are not 18 or it is illegal to read adult erotica where you live, close this out now, etc. His Twin PRELUDE My name is Ken. I look in the mirror now days, and I see the same face that has been staring back for the past 20 years. Give or take some facial hair, gray hair, and one or two extra lines. I'm a handsome guy, I won't bullshit, but I'm not stuck on myself. Looks aren't everything. I did some modeling down south a number of years ago and decided it wasn't for me. Too much drugs, too little sleep, and my coworkers were about as vapid and conceited as could be. Definitely not me. My skin tone is a dark olive. Most people think I'm Italian (I am not however; English with just enough Native American to give my white boy features a splash of exotic). I take good care of myself, I go to the gym 7 days a week, have for years, although honestly I've never been able to gain much mass. I stay the same body wise; nice, proportionate, small waist however that runs into a relatively large bubble butt, 6'4", toned and defined. I have been called "lithe" on quite a few occasions, but I'm not quite that skinny. A full head of black, straight hair. Not much in the way of body hair either. A bit around my nipples, no "glory trail", normal amount of pubic hair, smooth back and ass and hole, and a light dusting of hair on my lower legs and forearms, and hairless feet. And then, the huge brown eyes. Puppy dog style, framed by very long and lustrous eyelashes. Not feminine in my opinion...just very accentuated masculine. A lot of women tell me they would kill for my eyelashes. My junk isn't something to really be proud of. Flaccid I'm 1 inch. Hard, my cock is under average length and thickness, and about average sized balls. I always made the excuse "I'm a grower, not a shower." While it was true, I never mentioned it just didn't get much bigger. But I know how to use it, and actually have never had many complaints, save for the guys that laughed at it. GARY I was in the US Air Force, 91 – 95. I served overseas, after a brief boot camp and technical school stint in the states. I arrived at my base in England, an 18 year old nearly hyperventilating from culture shock. My "sponsor" from the base didn't greet me at Heathrow as he was supposed to. Oh well. I'm not entirely stupid, and at least they speak English. It was disconcerting riding in a vehicle on the opposite side of the road that I was used to. We got out of the heavily populated areas, weaving around round-abouts (I would learn later that stop signs are pretty much non-existent in England) as the bus never stopped. The English countryside was stunningly beautiful. Green for as far as I could see once the bus had left the populated areas. The day was pleasantly sunny, or so the old woman I was sitting next to told me. I asked her if it was often foggy, and she nodded. She had a very pale complexion, which I surveyed the other passengers of the bus, noting they were more or less the same. She asked me where I was from and I told her. She smiled and said that she hoped I enjoyed her country, and that I would find the people to be warm and accepting. She was right, as I would find out. I decided then to try my best to embrace the culture and accept the differences. I found my way to base, of course, and after checking in with my new Master Sergeant, got settled in my room, and there was a knock at my door. I open it, and there stood a guy, probably a couple years older than me, wearing nothing but white board shorts, very well-muscled body, smiling with an outstretched hand. I shook it as he spoke. "Hi! Are you Ken?" "Yes." "Hi, my name is Gary. Can I come in?" "Umm...I was unpac..." And he strode right on past. I stood there for a few moments, a little surprised and agitated from the intrusion, but figured oh well. Roll with it. I didn't know anyone there yet, and maybe it wouldn't hurt to make an acquaintance. "Sure." I mumbled, as I shut my door. Gary: "Look, one of my friends was supposed to be your sponsor and pick you up at the airport. He got drunk last night, and he's still sleeping it off..." "Well, isn't that thoughtful of him?" I said, a slight tone of irritation in my voice. I looked at Gary again, and a queasy feeling hit my stomach once again. His full head of hair, mousy brown and wavy, cut in a traditional air force cut (that is to say, professional and clean), big green eyes, kind of cocky half grin, muscular upper body, bit of hair leading down into the waistband of his shorts... I shook my head and thought what the hell are you doing? He stood there with the half smile on his face for a minute or so, just looking directly in my eyes. Staring. Penetrating. I tried to match the stare, but eventually had to look away. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude. I was kind of pissed...they told me someone would be waiting for me, but no one was..." (story of my life) "...I had a hell of a time trying to find out where the fuck I was going..." I stammered, still trying to keep my eyes off him. He was making me feel something I always ran away from. It was like I was back in the locker room in high school, trying not to look at the other boys. "Nah, don't worry about it." I looked up and those green eyes were still boring into me. "But, remember that I'm not the one that stood you up." Strange choice of words, I thought. "So, you're from Montana?" I nodded. "I hear it's beautiful there. I'm from New York City." That caught my interest. I always wanted to hear about big cities, and had even visited one. So I started asking him questions about it, anything that could come to mind, what it was like growing up there, going to school, on and on. He seemed to be happy entertaining my questions. But didn't go overboard with information either. He just kept staring while talking. I was busy unpacking my underwear, which were scattered on my bed, when Gary barged in. I started taking out my shirts from the suitcase, as he wandered over to my bed and picked up a pair of black, semi sheer string bikinis. I looked up, saw them hanging off his finger doing a slight twirl, and had to have turned every shade of red possible. Annoyed, I reached over and snatched them off his fingertip, but said nothing. "Hey, look, I didn't mean to be rude. They just looked...interesting." My face was pointed down at my suitcase, still felt hot, and then I felt an erection starting to grow. What. The. Fuck. I didn't like this at all. "Yeah, ok, whatever. So, I've got a lot of unpacking to do..." I said as I stood up and looked slightly down at him. He was probably about 6', I guessed. "And I'm really tired from the flight and trying to get myself to a base that was 2 hours away from the airport, so...?" Not really wanting to be rude, I let it kind of linger. "Whatever dude. I'll leave you to your unpacking. And you seem like you need a little nap." He said it like a parent would their bratty kid. "When you wake up in a better mood, come over to my room, 217, 4 doors down. We can go get something to eat in Shefford. I know some good restaurants. Later." He didn't wait for a response, just opened the door, walked out and closed the door kind of hard. I just stood there...looking down at the black sheer Brazilian cut bikini he was toying with, my face still flush, and with a noticeable tent in my shorts and a wet spot at the tip of the tent. I didn't realize it until then. What the fuck was going on? You need to understand where I came from. There is a lot that I won't tell. A lot that I have never told anyone. We all need our secrets, and I have dealt with mine. But, I digress. My father was the rough and tough cowboy type. Real asshole, and to be honest as lazy as they came. My mother, being a hard worker, supported the whole family (just her, me and him at that time) on her lone salary, while he toyed with his "horse ranch". I still don't speak to my biological father; I have little use for someone that just coasts along on his wife's apron strings. Anyway, I have a lot of respect for my mother in many things. One of them is not her rampant, evangelical attitude towards religion. So, on top of being raised with the expectation of being the emotionless "strong man" type cowboy, I also had the bible crammed down my throat for 18 years of my life. I was so deep in the closet back then I was sniffing last year's socks. I wouldn't even admit it to myself. The feelings I was having were "unnatural" and "hedonistic" and "evil". I just laugh to myself now days, wondering how I could have possibly been so stupid. But, then again, I've never been the smartest guy around. I try, definitely, but I'm not so big as to not be able to admit I come up relatively short in the brains department. But. It's ok. That's who I am, after all. Trying is more important sometimes than succeeding. Remember that, kids. Seriously. Back to the `rents. They got divorced just before I started high school. Which was fine by me. I did cry. Only because I was thankful he was gone. Sounds mean? Oh well. When a man literally kicks you, hits your head on a regular basis, and tells you you're nothing but a pile of shit (really), that person tends to loose favor in your heart. Mom remarried a couple years later and had another son with her new husband. 19 years separated us, and many miles, but I felt as though I knew him (and come to find out later he DID know me). Though all of this, I'm surprised, looking back on it, that I ever came out of the closet to begin with. The gay closet, that is. We will get to the other closet later. Suffice it to say coming out wasn't easy. I fought myself on so many things, for so long. But, finally, 3 weeks after having met Gary, my attraction for men became evident. I had turned down all requests by him, and a few from his friends, to join them in this or that activity. We only chatted infrequently at work, where I couldn't avoid him. He would ask me about home, what life was like before enlisting, all the normal stuff. Whenever I asked him a question, and IF I did get an answer it would be vague or noncommittal at best. I would see Gary out and about on the base. Every time I would stop and stare if he wasn't looking my way. Then my dick would start to harden up. I caught myself breathing kind of hard one time, just looking at him, thinking he's really attractive. Then I chastised myself, promising to say extra prayers that night for the bad thoughts I was having. Finally, one day, I was woken up by knocking on my door. I had a hell of a hangover (it was legal to drink in the UK at the age of 18, and I did so...often). I jumped up out of bed, adjusted myself in the red bikini I had passed out in, and cracked open my door. Gary, once again, just barged right in. I said a "Well, come in why don't you?" He didn't find that amusing, grabbed me by my shoulders, and forced me to sit on my bed. Then he spoke. "Ok, listen you little dicked cock tease. I saw you out last night. I wanted to talk to you, but you were just as drunk as could be. So we're going to have that talk now, and I don't give a shit how bad your head hurts. I'm going to speak. You're going to listen." I sat there, completely taken off guard. And in my still somewhat drunken stupor, I did as he said. "One question. Are you gay?" "Fuck no. Not even remotely, dude." "Ok, that's going to make the rest of this hard for you then." "Dude, I'm strai..." He slapped my face hard, a hand over my mouth. Then continued. "Look, Ken, I know what it must have been like for you growing up. But, you're going to have to admit it to yourself sooner or later. You're gay. There's no shame in that. I know you get hard when you see me around base. I know about the little wet spots on your uniform. Fuck, you're wet now. And look at that tiny cock!!!!!!! It's like a couple Vienna sausages trying to imitate a sequoia, leaking fuck juice all over! You think anyone wants to get fucked by that?" "It's not that small..." I tried to interject. He laughed, then continued. "I know that your breathing gets rapid. I know you want me. You just need to know it yourself. Stop being such a fucking douche bag coward. You are who you are, be proud of that!" He stopped his tirade at that point. I was on the verge of tears, his hand moving away from my mouth. I was starting to shake, and I pulled my legs up on my bed, hugging them into my chest. I just simply said "Get out." "Fine. But. This Friday, I'm having a party in the TV room on the third floor. You will be there. You will be wearing those cute little khaki shorts that make your ass look so fuckable, flip flops, and a tight t shirt. Under it, those sexy little black bikinis. Also, go to the BX and get a Fleet Enema 4 pack. At 5, use one bottle. Then after that one is done, use another. Just follow the instructions. Oh. Very Important. No jacking off till we talk Friday. I will know if you do." I tried to interject, but he wouldn't have it. "I'm not asking. Either you have your ass there by 8pm or I'm talking to the C.O. about your gawking and wet spots and little tiny hardons. ALL of it. Do as I'm telling you, and this is staying between us. You don't have a choice, bitch. Now get yourself cleaned up. It smells like feet and ass in here." He put his hands on the sides of my face, bent over and roughly kissed me, forcing his tongue in my mouth, biting my lips. If there was such a thing as mouth on mouth rape, this was it. "Do what I tell you, and everything will be fine." With that said, he opened the door, marched out, and slammed it behind him. I was so shaken up I actually jumped when he slammed the door, not looking at him, just lying there on my bed, hugging my legs into me, staring out my window at a tree slightly swaying in the wind, and started to sob as I felt a steel hard erection and a wet spot on my tight little underwear, feeling the truth of his words in my heart. THE PARTY Time went by quick. I was desperately horny for the couple days leading up to the party. I actually did as he said and hadn't jacked off. I was kind of proud of that, really. But it had been torturous, even though time seemed to whiz by. Then, thankfully, it was 5 pm on Friday, and there I was reading the instructions on the enema package. I followed them, finding that it actually didn't feel bad. I used the second one, and noticed nothing came out. I hoped that was normal, then showered, shaved, brushed my teeth, then back to my room to get dressed. I dressed exactly as he had said; slipping the black sheer undies up, noticing how the seat covered only half of my cheeks and the sheer material exposed my already hard little cock. I slipped a black tight t shirt on, and pulled up my knee length khaki shorts (which were so worn and washed out you could see the black undies outlined under, as they hugged my bubble butt). Then, for an added a splash of taste, I put on some of the expensive Channel Egoiste Platinum cologne I had picked up at the duty free shops in the airport while waiting for the sponsor that never arrived. This took a while, and I was fidgeting and fussing over my choice of t shirts and flip flops to wear, which extended the whole ordeal. Finally, I looked at myself in my wall mirror, and actually thought I looked kind of good. I liked the colors together, and seeing a faint outline of the skimpy underwear through the faded khaki material made my dick jump a bit. I looked somewhat preppy, with my hair teased up slightly. My stomach was in knots over it all, but my image boosted my confidence a bit. Why was I getting so worked up over this I asked myself? I'm preening myself like a bitch. It took forever with all the fussing and I looked at the clock and it read 7:50. Ok, I thought, 10 minutes early, gotta just go and get this over with. I made my way up to the TV and rec room, and walked in. Gary was nowhere to be seen so I went over to a cooler that I suspected might have some beer in it. As I bent over to fish a beer out, *slap* went a hand on my ass. I jerked up and almost threw the beer, turned around and there was Gary, smiling. "I'm glad you came Ken. And yes, help yourself." He said, still not having removed his hand from my buttock. I looked around nervously, but he said "Don't be so uptight man. Everyone knows about me. It's all cool, and everyone keeps these kinds of things on the down low. No one would rat me out to Major, and if you stop being such an uptight bitch, no one is going to rat you out either." "What are you throwing this party for?" I asked, slightly less nervous after taking a couple sips of beer. "Why, you, of course. This is your coming out party, ken." He smiled. Funny thing is, his smile was warm and sincere. My eyes bulged out. "Man, I told you, I'm not gay." "Stop fighting it Ken. Think about it man. You get hard looking at me. Fuck, you even get wet looking at me. Most gay men don't get wet from looking at another guy. Let me ask you a couple questions before people start getting here, ok? And if, after you answer honestly, I think I might have been wrong, then you will be free to leave. Cool?" I nodded quickly and got a smirk. But I would be honest. "Do you get hard looking at me?" I couldn't fight it. "Yes, I suppose..." "Do you admit that you lose precum when looking at me?" I looked down at the front of my khakis, my cock only partially stiff behind the thin fabrics, and sure enough. "Yes." I sighed. The smirk disappeared. "What happens..." And he put his arms around me, not roughly, but gently, maybe not to scare me? I don't know. Then he leaned in. Opened his mouth. I couldn't fight it. I did the same. It felt natural. He locked his lips on mine. His tongue was so gently pushing mine, and then he sucked my tongue in his mouth. We stayed locked in that passionate kiss for a long time. My eyes, which were wide open with fear to begin with, slowly closed. It felt so good and so right. At one point I went limp, and Gary pushed me back up against the wall, never breaking that amazing, electrifying lip lock. His hands were roaming my body, tearing at my nipples, caressing my thighs and abs, then reaching back around an kneeding my ass checks roughly. I was panting through my nose, moaning in his mouth, shaking with feelings I never had before. I had chills and heat waves running rampant throughout my body, and he broke the kiss, but only to plant his mouth on my neck and start nibbling and kissing all over. This went on for what felt like hours but was probably less than half an hour. He moved up to my ear lobes. Nibble, suck, bite, lick, chew. I was starting to really pant and moan. Fuck it felt good. Then his tented out trousers brushed my tented out trouser. And bang, just that touch, while he was chewing on my ears and neck, was all it took. I almost screamed, but he planted a hand over my mouth, and all that came out was a muffled "Mmmmmmphhhhhh..." as I had an orgasm. I felt it wet down my shorts and undies. I smelled cum. I was in heaven. He slowed his kissing, until he finally leaned back, still holding me (actually supporting me, I had no strength in my legs), and finished his question. "...when I do that?" I couldn't answer. I looked into those green eyes, and I knew. I was most certainly gay. I had some tears well up in my eyes, but I wasn't actually sad. I felt free, after a long life of being in the darkest room of the darkest house on the darkest planet in the darkest galaxy, I finally saw colors and light, I was free. It took me a minute, all the while he stood there. His strong muscles keeping me upright. Finally, I had the courage to speak. "Gary...I never knew...I'm so sorry..." "I know, baby boy, I know." He smiled as he said that, and gave me one last, light kiss on the mouth. He looked down at my spot and giggled, kind of naughtily, and looked up at me with mischief in his eyes. "I hope that happens a lot. But let's get you cleaned up before people get here." The party started. I knew I had a big wet spot on the front of me...but for some reason I didn't care. People either didn't notice, or didn't care either. Maybe they knew Gary had planned and hoped for that. Maybe it was a common thing for gay guys. I don't know. It was all so new to me. What mattered is that I didn't care. And neither did Gary. He spent the entire evening with his arm draped over my shoulder. This person or that person would come over and congratulate me on finally coming out. We were all a little drunk after a few hours. The party seemed to go on forever, and the coolers never seemed to run down much on beer. I didn't get very drunk that night for some reason, however. And neither did Gary. I got pleasantly tipsy and just held it. Someone had brought a bottle of tequila toward the end, to which Gary and I did a couple shots each of. Then, as people were still having fun, Gary slipped me out and down to his room. We were in his room, frantically tearing our clothes off, him completely tearing up and off my khakis, pulling my t shirt above my head and on my arms, but stopping before pulling it off. The, gently, he maneuvered my arms around my back, midway up, and gently twisted the t shirt several times until it was tight on my wrists, and my arms were immobilized. "Do you trust me?" "Yes, but what..." "Then trust me. Don't talk, just trust that I need to do this and will not ever harm you. OK?" "Ok..." and quickly added "I'm a virgin, Gary..." He flashed a wicked smile and "I know, now hush." The tequila shots had done their magic, my inhibitions gone, and Gary's somewhat domineering manner completely turning me on, I did what he asked and just trusted him. He pulled the seat of my Brazilian cuts aside (which wasn't hard...there's not that much covering anything with that cut...might as well just wear a thong), exposing my hole, then gently laid me on my chest on his bed, pulling my ass up and making me arch my back, spreading my knees. "Stay like that. I want your cock and balls not touching anything so you can last as long as possible." It was an order, kind of like when a superior officer would just bluntly tell you to do something, without saying `and that's an order'. And then he laid on top of me, his pelvic area raised up just like mine but with a much different purpose, his muscular legs spread out and draped over my thighs, his muscular chest pressing into my back, every so often nipping somewhat hard on my ear lobes and neck. I could feel his cock between my ass cheeks. It felt enormous. I didn't know how big I was or how big other guys were in comparison at that point. I did my best to look away from other guys in the showers and locker rooms. I didn't watch porn, being the goody two shoes church boy that I had been. But I could feel his size. It felt as big as my whole, plump ass. It felt monstrous. Powerful. I had a suspicion of what was going to happen, but I was feeling so good, riding such a high from the events of the night, that I was loose and accepting of what was going on. "I'm going to fuck you, baby boy. It's going to hurt you. But at the end, you're going to feel better than you ever have before. I need to fuck you, Ken, I need to be inside you, I need to mark you as mine." And as he finished his last sentence I could feel his cock starting to enter my ring. I could feel the massive size of the cock head. I was loose from the booze, but not that loose. "Oh god, I can't, Gary I can't take it, it hurts!!!" I started to scream, he put a pillow on my mouth. "Shhhh...now baby, you're going to get fucked, I have to have you. I have to take your cherry. That beautiful ass...never seen anything so nice and round and so..." He pushed further in, as my screams into the pillow got louder. "...perfectly made to be fucked as your ass...yeah baby boy, feel it..." I continued to pant and scream into the pillow, aware at least that I didn't want to attract too much attention from his (and my) neighbors. "Aw, fuuuuuccckkkkk, my baby boy, my little fuck toy, my little pussy, yeah..." Gary started pushing in and out slowly. It felt like every time he would push back in, there was more. I couldn't believe it, I thought my ass was going to blow apart. It felt so stretched. That's when the first ping of pleasure came back there. He hit something inside me, and I reacted. "OH...yeah, got ya that time, didn't I? That was your ass pussy, that's your happy spot...I `ll show you, you'll never want to jack off again..." He continued to rub in certain ways as he pulled in and out. I think I finally felt him bottom out in me, I felt light scratching on my hairless cheeks, must have been his pubes. And I felt so fucking full. But every time his cock would rub in and out, move around, it would hit that little happy spot he told me about, and I would writhe under him. I pushed the pillow out of the way, as at this point I was moaning in pleasure and only every so often grunting in pain. He kept his up, but started to speed up. I was going wild under him, although I couldn't do anything but wiggle and squirm underneath his more muscular body. I started to feel that hot flush again, the one where you know you have a load building inside and it's going to come blasting out your dick. I was bucking back into him at that point, almost screaming "please don't ever stop..." and "oh fffffffuuuuuuccccckkkkk meeeeeeee..." abbreviated by the fast jabs of his, making it sound like I was being shook while trying to talk. "Yeah bitch!!!" He did yell. "Yeah, that's what it feels like when a real man fucks your cunt!!! You like that? Huh?!?!? Answer me!!!" I was gasping and panting "Aaaahhhhhh...fuck yes I love it...pleaaasee...ahhhhhh...fffffuuuuucccckkkk my cuuuunnnnntttt..." I said in between thrusts, trying to answer him coherently, but just sounding like I was attached to a paint mixer or a wash machine that was violently out of control. I stopped speaking, I stopped thinking, and then flash bang I exploded with so much force it hurt my cock and balls. "I'm cummming!!!!! Oh yeah I'm cumming!!!! Ohhhh ohhhh ouahhhh!!" He continued pounding, the strokes getting fiercer, and his nuts would slap against mine painfully as he savagely thrust inside my battered hole. `I'm cumming' would be the last coherent thought that night from me. I didn't remember anything after that except intense pain and immeasurable pleasure. I could hear his talk, somewhat feel his nips on my tender flesh, and I was aware of everything, but it's like it was so far away, and all that mattered was the pain and pleasure of that fuck. The next morning, I remember waking up, no hangover. Just a serious throbbing in my backside. I felt back there, hissed and winced at the pain, and brought my hand back. My fingers were slick with cum. It was still wet back there. There was also some blood. But not too much, not enough to freak out about. I gently laid back down on the bed, on my stomach. I felt a huge wet spot under my junk. I must have cum more than once, then just collapsed where I was. I looked around, Gary wasn't there. I reached back and gingerly pulled the seat of my skimpy bikini back over to the other cheek, once again covering half of my ass. I decided to just lay there for a bit, in his bed, smelling his masculine odor on the sheets and pillow. As I did, I thought back to last night and all that led up to my current, cum covered self. I had an awesome time at the party. No 18 year old, in my opinion, had ever had that much fun. I giggled. If my church members could see me now...I laughed at that. "You know what? So what if they could? Fuck the hypocritical bastards. I won't be like that ever again." "Well, thank every-fucking-thing that is good. I'm glad to hear that baby boy." I was a bit surprised, as Gary snuck in the room and his friend (that I was kind of wary of, he looked a little sharky, but I would later learn I had nothing to fear from him) Andrew followed right behind, closing the door. Andrew's eyes got huge. "Fuck, Gary, can the poor boy even walk??? Look at his ass, and that's only from the fucking side!!!! What the fuck did you do??" Gary laughed loudly, "Well, I fucked him, I took his cherry, dipshit. You know how big my dick is. His is so small, it's pretty useless so I showed him how a real man fucks. And fucks. And then fucks some more." Andrew was laughing hard, and Gary had a sardonic grin on his beautiful face. I was actually a little put off by this, and tried to pull a blanket up over me but winced in pain at the sudden movement and tenderized boyhole. So I just scowled at Andrew and Gary. "How big...or small...is he?" Andrew asked. "One inch flaccid, about 4 inches hard." Gary giggled. Andrew roared. "Man...I can't wait to tell everyone that this big guy is so...underdeveloped down there..." He was laughing. Gary chuckled when he saw my look. "Baby, don't worry. You got nothing to hide. Andrew is cool. Fuck, trying to hide this beautiful ass should be a crime. And there's nothing wrong with a bottom boy being tiny. Just a fact, get used to it." He sat down by my head on the bed and pulled the blanket off me completely. Andrew plopped down in a chair and quickly pitched in with a big smile and said "That's no shit ken. That's one gorgeous ass." Licking his lips and rubbing his crotch a bit, making me back down from my scowl and think maybe I should just try to get up. "I mean seriously, even as wrecked as it is right now, that's just so hot..." "Get your own, Andy, this one is mine." As he painfully slapped my buttocks, eliciting a yelp from me, and a "Sorry, babe" from him. I just smiled at him. He handed me a cup of coffee and told me to just keep lying there like that and he would feed me the breakfast sandwich they had picked up for me. And he did. I nibbled little bits of it as he fed them to me, sipped the wonderful hot coffee. I thought to myself `For once in my life, I think I might know what the emotion "content" truly is', and as I looked up to Gary, feeding me, staring back down at me with those luscious green eyes, so full of warmth (and what looked like love?) I thought to myself "No. I KNOW what content is." The following two years would be the most memorable of my life. The happiest of my life. Of course, there were both ups and downs. And we had to be careful at times. Gary wasn't a disciplinarian. But, there were things he was strict about. I wasn't "allowed" to masturbate. He wanted my pleasure to coincide with his pleasure, as he explained to me. We would go off base, find a fish & chips stand, get some lunch or find a kabob shop and chow down. One of our favorite things was to take the train into London and go clubbing all night, dancing with each other and occasionally with some Brit guy. He would buy me a pair of underwear for the night, usually something that covered very little and was entirely or mostly sheer. His favorites were thongs and Brazilian cut bikinis. I would end up stripped to just those and my shoes at a club most often. He just loved to showcase my ass. I was a naïve kid. But he protected me. He was only 2 years older than me, but he felt like more of a dad to me than my biological father. He taught me. He cared for me, nurtured me. He knew me, right from the start. He could see the hesitance and submission, veiled behind my anger that first day. He knew I wasn't the kind of guy that would stand up for himself much. I may be tall and decently built, but I was a scared kid inside. And scarred. He knew this, but loved me anyway. Our sex was always mind blowing. At times, he would bind me. It thrilled me. At times he would fuck me hard. Other times he would make love. But, never once, did I ever masturbate and break his rule. And occasionally I would climax just from feeling him inside me, rubbing against my happy spot. He was right, I didn't need it anymore. All I needed was his love and manhood, deep inside me. That pleasure to me, was worth more than all the times I had ever touched myself for pleasure. I was faithful to his demands from the beginning. Why? Because of the look in those eyes, that morning after. That is something precious, the most precious thing imaginable. Master Sergeant even let us become roommates, of course giving us a knowing smile, and an admonishment to keep it out of public eye from then on. Come to find out later, his son was gay. We happily complied. Which made our parting so very, very hard. I tried to get assigned to his base when our base was closing. When that failed and I was in tears, he went down immediately to talk to Sarge, try and get himself transferred to the base I was headed to. The answer took a while, a few days of torturous waiting, and finally Sarge called Gary down one day after work. The answer was no. We were both in tears for hours, and then even a couple weeks after that I had a tough time to control it. I would have to go to the restroom every time someone mentioned the base closing or reassignments or something of the sort, and find a stall and soundlessly cry, even if it was just a little bit. So, we made a pact. We wouldn't be sad with each other for our remaining 3 months. We would enjoy every single day. I did something I shouldn't however, and didn't tell Gary. I went to the Master Sergeant and tried to get an early-out. I desperately wanted to be with Gary. I was willing to give up my job, my livelihood, even a potential career, just to be with the man that had justified my existence. But, even that came back a solid, resounding "no". I couldn't help it and started crying right there, a few days after I initially requested it from Sarge. He surprisingly, or maybe not so, got up and came around and hugged me until I stopped. He kept his hand on my shoulder and stepped back. He said "Son, I know about you two. I know what this means to you. But you signed a contract with the US Government. That takes precedence. Don't do anything stupid. Life does this some times. There's nothing you can do, and it is unfair and it really hurts, but there's nothing you can do. This was your last means of staying together. I know, I've been down similar roads myself. If I could help, hell if Major could help, we would. What you can do however, is cherish each day with each other. Don't waste it. Make memories. It may be that you two end up back together at some point in your lives, and you will have no regrets, you'll have been honest and true to both yourselves and each other. Remember that, son. That is what is important. Now, clean up, and dismissed." I looked up at him, and got a little teared up again but fought it back. I said "Yes, Sarge." I turned sharply, not forgetting my dignity, and got to the door. I stopped and said. "There's no way I can possibly thank you enough for trying, Sarge. But thank you." And walked out. The next 3 months, thankfully, went by slow. Gary and I went to London every week. We took pictures with each other everywhere. We bought each other sexy little things to wear, him silk boxers or boxer briefs and me the skimpy little things he so loved to see and fuck me in. We even got new boots there. I still have those boots. They've had 5 soles replaced. We went to clubs, danced and drank and kissed...even made love anywhere we could in the city. Well, ok, sometimes he just fucked my brains out. But hey, I was getting some! And definitely wouldn't complain about either. I think Gary and I walked that entire city. We would hold hands, walking down the Thames river, just taking in the beauty of it all, and the beauty of each other and what we had together. The fateful day came. Gary's bus to Heathrow was leaving a half hour earlier than mine to Gatwick. I stood there, only a couple people around us, with him. I threw caution to the wind. We were off base anyway. In the chill and fog of that morning, standing there beside the bus stop outside of the base, the beautiful English countryside rolling off in 3 directions, I stepped close, he started smiling, and I reached my arm out to him, both his came around me, and we locked our lips. Like that first night. Damn anyone that didn't like it. We heard the bus coming, and broke our kiss. "Don't ever forget me Gary, because I never will be able forget you." "That's something you shouldn't ever worry about, Ken. You are unforgettable, baby boy." "I love you." I croaked. "I love you." He croaked back. And stepped on the bus. I stood there, as he got a window seat, sat down and looked out at me, eyes red, waving. I stood there trying to compose myself, knowing my eyes were red as well. I waved back, pointed at my heart and then at him. He did the same, as the bus pulled off. I stood there like a fool, waving as the bus drove down the road and out of site. I lost it. I started silently sobbing, and just couldn't stop, even when I got on my bus, took a look back toward the base, our base, I could only hold the sobs back, but the tears kept flowing. All the way to Gatwick, and all the way across the ocean, to my port of St. Louis, the on to San Francisco, and up to Montana for a month of leave. That entire way, the tears flowed, but silently and slowly. We promised to write. For a year, we wrote back and forth. His tone in the letters changed toward the 11th month. The 13th month, I got a letter from Gary. It read heartbreakingly: "Ken; What can I say to you? You had my heart from that first day. I am pretty sure I had yours almost as soon. A friend of yours from tech school had a picture of you and her. I saw it. I knew you almost instantly. And I knew I wanted to be with you. I am staying in the Air Force, Ken. I know you were thinking about getting out, and I think you should really think about that. Maybe it would be good for you to stay in. But, whatever choice you make, remember what I told you. Be proud of yourself. This is the part that I really don't want to say, and have been putting off for a couple months now. You know I love you. You know there will be no other like you in my life. What we shared, I wouldn't trade for the rest of my life. But, holding on, for a year, it has been very hard on me. And I think it's been very hard on you. I can tell from your letters. At least I think I can. I got to know you very well. We need to see other people, Ken. We need to move on. Don't lose the memories, what we had. Remember it, and don't lose it. There will be others, different than us, but there will be others. Go out, and find a new love. I'm going to. At least try. I don't know if I will be successful or not, but I'm going to try. You need to too Ken. I do hope our paths cross again. Love you, my baby boy. Forever. Gary." I won't bore with the details. Fact of the matter is, I can't write them. I can't write what life was life the following few months. I was a lovesick, broken hearted kid. Maybe I'm different, but I didn't go out and have sex with as many people as I could. I didn't have sex at all. To be truthful, I didn't masturbate for a month, at least. I don't remember exact days. It's hard to remember exact days when you are in an endless fog. Gradually, I saw that he was right. Once again. Gradually, I came out of my shell and started hanging out with new friends. Time heals, old wounds remain. And they can be brought to the surface so suddenly, as I would find out later in life. Chapter 1 End. Author's note: This is the first chapter. I'm hoping that people enjoy it. It will advance to have a lot more kink and domination, although the domination at this point in my life was very limited. It was both fun and disturbing to write. So many emotions...I have since begun explaining to "His twin" everything (in real life), and that will be one of the last chapters. So, it is naturally, still as yet unwritten. I'm not sure how things will progress, as he is just SO damned tough to read as a person. Sometimes I feel like he's in love with me, the next I feel like he's disgusted by me. Anyway... The second chapter is almost finished, and I will have that ready in a few days. I haven't set a limit on how many chapters this story will be, but it will ultimately have to have a conclusion where I have to leave off at the point in life I am at now. But, without a doubt, there will be more chapters coming. I've had a wild ride so far, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I have. If you have questions or comments, my email is kenduxbury52@gmail.com Feel free to drop me a note, and I will reply as soon as possible! This work is not to be copied, reproduced, or used in anyway except for personal reading, without my expressed permission. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy! Kenneth P Duxbury