Date: Sat, 09 Feb 2008 16:45:52 -0500
From: boyforboss@aol.com
Subject: slave journal - Chapter 1

Thank You, Sir for allowing this faggot slave the hoor of training with
Sir!  As commanded, the following is a detailed account of faggot's past
sexual experiences.

faggot is aware that is never to refer to itself as "I", or "me" or "my"
but only as "it", "faggot", or "slave".  Sir, with Your gracious
permission, and for the sake of a clear account, faggot will refer to it's
pre-slavery life using "I" (but in lower case) and "my".  faggot begs Sir's
pardon, and awaits Sir's next command.

slave journal - Age 10 - 14

Shortly after i had turned 10 years old, my family moved to a suburb of San
Diego.  i was a young, skinny, blond beach kid.  All of the kids i knew
rode skateboards, boogie boarded after school, wore Vans, Op, and
Quicksilver clothing.  my family moved into one of those cookie-cutter
stucco villages so popular in that area.  There were always tons of kids
around, but having just moved there, i didn't have many friends.  Being a
skinny fag boy didn't help, either!

There was a kid that lived at the end of our street where it curved right
and into the next neighborhood.  His name was Rudy and he had curly red
hair.  He was older, about 14 or so, and he had that long, lean super tight
body that kids have at that age.  He always ran around in his long board
shorts and flip-flops (we called them thongs back then).

Every once in awhile, Rudy and one of his buddies named Don would let me
hang out with them.  They would talk between them, virtually ignoring me,
about girls, cars, and sex.  i would ask them questions about what they
were discussing.  Questions like "What's a pussy?" or "What does a blow job
mean?"  They would usually always tell me the answer, but they would laugh
hysterically at me and make fun of me because i didn't know.  i didn't
understand why at the time, and didn't know the words to describe what was
happening, but i felt thrilled that even though they laughed, they were
directing their attention at me in some little way.

One day, Don got fed up at the questions, and finally said he was sick of
giving me information when i didn't do anything for him.  He came up to me,
and gave my face a mild slap, but it stung.  i immediately brought my hand
to my face and said "ow".  That's when Rudy came behind me and held my arms
behind my back.  i could feel him intensely and could smell his clean
summer sweat.  i said "stop" and Don slapped my face and told me not to
speak.  When i said "ow" again he took his knuckle and thumped me in the
chest really hard, saying to me "don't say ow".  when i said "let me go" he
slapped my face and said "i told you not to speak" when i said "ow" i again
received another chest thump.  This game continued for a bit until i got my
first little boy hard on.  Don saw it, and laughed and said to Rudy "the
little gay-wad has a hard on!"  They both laughed and laughed.  i was so
embarrassed and also felt like i could stay there forever and receive the
attention from these two older boys.  i started to speak and that got the
game going again for another 15 minutes or so, until they got bored.  i was
finally let go and told to take off.  i ran all the way home, flushed with
excitement and strange new feelings of desire.  i didn't know about beating
off yet, but i laid on my bed and rubbed my little boy dick and thought
about all that had happened to me that afternoon.  i couldn't wait for the
next time they let me hang out with them.  Unfortunately summer ended soon
enough and they went off to high school and never looked at me again.

i didn't live far from the middle school that i attended, as the bird flew.
If i followed the sidewalks, i had to walk all the way around the housing
development i lived in to get to my house.  That often took about 20
minutes.  i quickly discovered that at the back of the school, there was a
gully that was not fenced off.  The banks of the gully were heavily wooded
with Eucalyptus trees and brush, and rarely had water in it.  It was about
a 10 foot straight drop on the school side with a small foot trail that led
down, and a medium incline leading up to street and houses on the other
side.  i figured that if i started taking the gully home, i could shave the
walk down to about 10 minutes.

One day, there was a group of boys from my school playing there.  i started
to cross the gully and was coming up the incline when from behind, i got
knocked down.  One boy took my backpack, and the others rolled me over onto
my back while one straddled my chest.  The boy on my chest was slapping my
face and hitting me around the head, while asking "what are you doing here,
fag?"  i started to cry a little and that only made it worse.  Some of the
other boys started to make fun of me, calling me "sissy" and "cry baby".
Most of them laughed.  The beating wasn't really too bad, we were just
kids, but it was enough to scare and excite me.  i never told anyone what
happened, but never changed my route home, either.  i got jumped a few more
times, but then it stopped.

When i was 13 years old, we moved to Colorado.  It was a rough move for me,
with a new step-mother and another new school.  My father decided that he
couldn't handle my attitude anymore and that i was going to boarding
school.  At the time, he was thinking military school, but my step-mother
convinced him to give me a choice of three schools.  i ended up picking
what looked to be the most lenient school, located in Utah.  It was mainly
for boys between the ages of 11 and legal age who had discipline problems,
or minor brushes with authorities.  Most were white, and the average age
was 16.  The school was divided into 'units', each had 12 - 16 boys divided
up into 3 - 4 rooms.  In each room were 2 sets of bunk beds, and a dresser
for every 2 boys.  Each unit had a diverse range of ages and geographical
origin and was headed by a counselor.  Counselors were men who acted as
mentors, and were there in shifts from 6 am until 11 pm.  The age range for
counselors was 26 - 30.

Every boy went to school each weekday. The school was basically locked
down.  There were high fences around the property, which abutted open
forest.  Leaving, was absolutely impossible on your own, and the privledge
was not given out lightly.  A group of boys that had shown responsibility
were chosen to act as night watch and head count.  If a boy went missing,
all hell would break loose, and the poor boy would be brought back quickly
and locked in isolation rooms.  i was chosen to be on night watch with 5
other boys.  We were all about 13 or 14.  Out task was to walk the
perimeter of the property and to walk through every unit making sure all
boys were accounted for.  Night watch lasted from 6 pm until 11 pm.  It was
the only way to get a little freedom there, even though we never left
property.  i became friends with a boy from Oregon named Doug.  He was a
year younger than me, but bigger, stronger, and played sports well.  One
night we were all standing around the skateboard half-pipe that some of the
older boys had been allowed to build.  Doug and 2 other boys climbed to the
top of the half-pipe, and a boy named Ray dared them to jum from the 15
foot perch.  It's not much of a dare, but we were bored and Doug said "what
do I get if I jump?"  Ray pointed to me and said "He'll suck you off."  i
was shocked and tried to protest but Doug had already jumped off and landed
right in front of me.  "Ok" he said and unzipped his fly.  i tried to get
away but Ray said "Go ahead, you know you want it.  We see you looking at
us in the shower."  He was right.  Doug put his hand on my shoulder and
pushed me down.  His dick was hard and smooth and it smelled slightly
sweaty and sweet.  i put his dick in my mouth and gave my first blow job in
front of our friends.  After that, Doug made sure that we were always
partnered together and every time, i would blow him at least twice.  After
some of the boys heard about it, i started getting harrassed by them.  It
always turned me on, but embarrassed me, too.

One night, and older boy named Nathan (he always wore a DUKE t-shirt) told
me i was going to play a game with him and a few other boys.  He told me to
kneel down and the boys made a circle around me.  He told me to bend my
head back and open my mouth.  They all began to beat off while Nathan told
them that it was a contest to see who could not only cum first, but could
make their cum land in my mouth.  Not many of them made it right into my
mouth, but my face was covered in the cum from four 16 year old boys.  That
first night i cried at the humiliation, but also rubbed my hard boy cock
too.  That happened around 4 more times while i attended the school.

On Saturday and Sunday, the entire school ate breakfast before heading back
upstairs to each unit to shower and finish weekend chores.  All laundry,
cleaning, and kitchen work as performed by the students.  One Saturday
while i was eating with my unit, i was told that i had a visitor and to go
upstairs to shower and report to the office.  i went up alone, excited to
have a visitor, which was rare.  i got undressed and stepped into the group
shower stall.  The stall had 8 shower heads in it and was entered by a
small tiled archway.  Just as i was finishing, one of the unit counselors
came and stood in the archway.  He was naked and his growing hard on was
bobbing up and down in a menacing manner.  He was blocking the door, and
when i approached him to exit, he said "I know what you've been doing on
night watch" He added "If you are sweet to me, I won't get you in trouble."
When he said this, he smiled at me and touched my upper arm, sort of
stroking it.  He told me to kneel down and look up at him.  He told me to
lick his balls and to make sure my eyes NEVER left his.  i started licking
and while he looked down his body at me, he began to jack off.  He must
have been really horny, because before long, he began to breathe hard, and
his dick exploded with cum.  His cum ran down his hand and on my nose.  He
started to rub his cum covered fingers over my lips and told me to lick
them clean.  i felt so humiliated and used, but had another raging hard on.
When i was done cleaning him up, he patted my butt and told me to go get
dressed.

There were only a few black boys at the school and they seemed very exotic
for me.  Remember, i had come from a white, republican coastal community.
They were all iin the 17 age range.  They seemed so much older and stronger
to me.  One of them, Tony lived in my unit.  He used to tease me all the
time about my lips, which were quite fat (good cocksucking lips).  The
whole year i went to this school he only teased me, but never touched me.
Until my last week.  He would often tell me that he would put different
colors of lipstick on me and have me make a lipstick rainbow down his black
dick.  He would laugh so hard at me blushing, and then he would sometimes
say that he would have me suck him off in front of everyone.  The last week
of school, i have to admit that i was being a little prick.  Mouthing off
to everyone and pretty much pushing my luck with the other boys.  It was a
good feeling knowing that you were leaving what you thought was hell and
leaving everyone behind.  Tony finally had enough with my sass.  In front
of the entire unit, he grabbed me by the back of my neck and propelled me
forward from the common room into the room he shared.  The whole time, i
tried to get out of his grip by squirming and trying to pry his rock hard
hand from my neck.  i was really scared and it showed.  Most of the boys
followed us.  Tony said "You're gonna finally get what you deserve!"  While
still holding my neck with his big, black hand, he pushed me down on my
knees and dug through his dresser drawer.  Out came a little tube of bright
red lipstick!  i never knew how he got that past the regular searches, but
there it was.  i started to struggle but Tony was too strong, and i was -
and still am - a skinny fag boy.  He got the lipstick on me even though i
fought hard.  i could feel the waxy, stickiness of it all over my mouth.
He pulled out a hard, dark black dick with a big pink head and started to
shove it against my tightly clenched lips.  He squeezed my nose hard until
i gasped for air and shoved his dick into my mouth.  i had never really
seen a black boys dick before and i was terriefied.  He fucked my mouth
open and then started to really tool out my throat.  It was the first time
a dick had gone down that far into my throat, and i choked and gagged while
he moved his hands to the sides of my head and fucked into me.  Soon there
was enough spit and mucus that he was fucking hard and fast saying that he
"knew exactly how to shut my hole" and that he was going to make my throat
a pussy.  He came shortly after that last comment and with a deep shudder
and moan shot so much cum into my mouth that it was dripping out the sides
of my mouth.  i gagged hard on the huge wad of cum as some was forced out
of my nostrils.  He bent over my head exhausted and panting.  Then,
standing up, he pulled out and wiped his lipstick, cum and mucus covered
dick in my hair.  Shoving me back, i landed on my ass, choked with spit and
crying.  i hurried to the bathroom and looked in the mirror, the lipstick
smeared obscenely all over my mouth.

i left the school a few days later with very mixed emotions.  i hated being
there, being away from California, being away from what i knew.  On the
other hand, i had received more attention that at home, and the secretly
best part of it all was i got to suck boys' dicks.  i felt a sense of
purpose and belonging.

Thank You Sir, for allowing faggot to tell the first part of it's story.
Sir, as always, faggot can be reached at boyforboss@aol.com for Your
comments and next command.