Date: Sun, 11 May 2014 07:06:11 -0700 (PDT)
From: willlnyc@yahoo.com
Subject: Weaning Your Boy the Alternative Way, a Dad's Story - Chapter 2

DISCLAIMER: The following story is a work of fiction.  It contains erotic
homosexual incestuous themes between adult men and minors. If you are a
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...




WEANING YOUR BOY THE ALTERNATIVE WAY, A DAD'S STORY

— CHAPTER 2 —



The chapter you just read is a great example to introduce you to one of the
many creative ways I discovered in weaning my son. It contains methods
which must seem unorthodox and in complete opposition to the standards
practiced by most parents. Most of you will probably find it
reprehensible. If I myself had read this, years before ever having had the
actual experience of raising the kind of son I have, I know I would have
been appalled. But here's the thing, when you become a parent, you are
never prepared for the reality that the rules you find in all the thousands
of child-rearing books sometimes just don't apply to your very own
child. Every child is special with their own special needs and
weaknesses. Sometime you have to experiment until you find something that
works. Sometimes the situation of how your child is acting is going to
completely freak you out! You'll be like, this is MY child? There's no way
this alien is what I gave seed to! Yes, you love them, of course you do,
but there is nothing a kid does better than put that love to the test!

I'm a father and this book is for fathers. There is a special bond a father
will have for his child. There is a kind of pride a man will have for his
child which a mother simply cannot match — no matter how much she loves
her children — especially when that child is his son. Mothers love their
child with a nurturing attitude, they indulge and placate, many times
unfortunately at the child's expense. A father brings a firm hand because
he sees his child as an extension of himself. To be blunt, it is your seed
which made that cute little kid who is running around right in front of
you, who has just now knocked over the coffee cup over the leather seat in
your M6 Bimmer. This little monster is a direct extension of its Dad, and
so, you as its father, have more of a responsibility to get its little
scrawny ass in line. The mom is good cop, so you will have to know how to
bring the tough love to ensure your child is on the right track in order to
foster its true potential. And sometimes it will necessitate pretty extreme
measures. If you don't accept this as reality, just keep following all the
childcare books you already have and throw this book in the trash now. But
if you've tried everything the books have to say like I did, its hitting
you over the head that your own little Bobby is becoming a kind of stranger
to yourself, some kind of nightmare come true, getting worse everyday, less
and less the kid you want to call your own — keep reading — this book
is for you.

I wrote this book because someone had to write it. Every source in which I
turned for answers — online discussion groups, books and periodicals —
became more frustrating. I wasn't getting anywhere, not finding solutions —
my search became a complete waste of my time. Nothing worked. Nothing
seemed to address the fundamentals of my own situation. This book is about
a father's journey into the unknown — rearing a boy. When it comes down
to it, every single parent makes this same journey into the unknown. For
every child is different, and to understand that child, you first have to
understand who YOU are. You can't understand your child, understand what is
best for him, understand what is NOT WORKING for the best for your child
until you understand who you are first.

This is the one point I cannot emphasize more. You have to understand who
you are before you can understand your child. Your child IS you. Your child
is you but then again your child isn't you. Your child is an extension of
who you are, but was born with a different set of genes than you. A child
is affected directly by its parents. What your child will become depends on
how he is reared. If the parents don't understand their own thoughts,
emotions, feelings and needs in relation to their child, believe me, the
child will suffer the consequences even more than the parents.

So on this journey which every parent will make, there will come a time
when the parent will have to ask themselves, who am I? Believe me, once you
have a child, you will learn more about yourself then you will ever want!
You will have to, if you are serious about harnessing the best parent which
resides right inside you.

This is my journey in understanding myself in order to understand my
boy. Every person who finds themselves the nurturer, mentor, teacher and
protector of their defenseless, precious offspring will have to make this
journey for themselves. Every person's journey will be a different one, as
each father, mother and child will be different. Your town will be
different, your careers, personal strengths and weaknesses, talents,
passions, economic situations — they all will make your own journey an
individual one. Mine is a story about a father and single parent with one
special, beautiful but vexing little guy for a son. A son who, early on, I
grew to find a complete stranger to myself. One I found increasingly
difficult to accept as a boy of my own. It was like some strange creature
had inhabited him, he became someone who I found almost impossible to see
any connection to myself. The only way I grew to see this boy as my own,
involved taking a resolute inventory of myself and my expectations.

I don't imagine every person who has picked up this book in their
desperation to find answers will relate to everything I write. Your
circumstances may be so different from mine — you could have a happy
marriage, or a troubled one you are working through. It may be a daughter
about whom you are concerned, you may be a single mother. You may be
jobless, an immigrant. Your child may have a completely different set of
issues like a serious medical problem or a learning disability. You may
have behavioral or psychological concerns about your child. But whatever
they are, I hope my message is universal enough to shine through and light
a path which will help you find a way in your own set of circumstances.

This book is about much more than the alternative ways of weaning a child,
it's about accepting who that child really is and who you really are. It's
about understanding your expectations and where they come from. It's about
accepting the fact that your little one will undoubtedly make a complete
dash of what you would expect of a child you would call your own — and
learning to say "hey, that's ok."

This book is my story, one that tells how I found my own individual path as
a single father with a single son. One where the father learned much more
about himself as he struggled to understand his child. It is a radical
tale, but isn't every life radical? As a father, I learned how deep one has
to go to find the answers, the places one is forced to go before he can
accept without denial, without fear, the truth about himself and his
son. They are places I discovered no other child-rearing books have had the
guts or honesty to go.

And yes, as you must have clearly realized from the first chapter, this
story involves understanding the sexual aspects of life. If you are going
to fully grasp who you or your child is, sexuality is something one cannot
ignore . But it is always the first aspect of ourselves we deny
inspection. The study of filial sexuality is certainly to be avoided like
the plague! No one talks about it. And if you do, there must be something
wrong with you. I know, because I've been there. Had I not my own son to
rear, I'm sure I would have reacted to what I write now with a measure of
disbelief and hostility. But I am a man who was forced into a position
where I had to face incredibly difficult stuff to break through to the
other side. In order to be a good, understanding and accepting dad, I had
to embrace the darkest, most avoided topics of child rearing — sex. And
again, to understand why I couldn't accept the way my son acted, I first
had to understand who I was and the where and why of my expectations. I had
to understand my hangups about sex first before I could then comprehend
what the difficulty was in finding the proper, loving and accepting way to
rear my son for his best potential.

These things are simply not discussed and so I had to find out for
myself. I am sharing this story for those out there who may have met with
the same silence with which I met. Since this is my particular experience
with my own set of circumstances I will relate it explicitly from my point
of view. I feel it is important to underscore that my path is singular,
different from all others. It may be deemed almost aberrant by many —
before my journey, I would have been shocked to confront my very own words
had I not learned what I know today. But now that I am able to see myself
and my boy for what we really are, I wonder just how uncommon it is. It may
be more common than most would like to accept. Those of you who aren't like
me with a son like mine, may never have to embrace the importance of living
your live fully as complete human beings; you may never grasp what it takes
to raise your son to live the honest life he was meant to live.

The details of this story may not be universal, but what i think is
universal is the kind of breach I had to make through the barriers of
commonly-held beliefs and child-rearing practice in order to see with
clarity. I am a man and father so will write this story from a masculine
perspective. My child is a boy and so I will refer to him as son. So, for
now on, I'll dispense, for the most part, the words parent and child, and
in their stead, I will use when referring to myself, father or dad; for my
child, boy or son. Because this is our story, we aren't just parent and
child, we are father and son.

If you aren't afraid to continue, you are going to discover how a father,
before he could find the only way to wean his boy, had to learn a hard
lesson, accepting unflinchingly who he is as a man, and who his son is as a
boy. And how, once he understood who he and his boy truly were —
jettisoning his expectations of what a father and son should be — he
found acceptance and experienced for the first time, the real unshakable
bond his son and he were meant to share.