Date: Wed, 13 Jan 2010 18:53:12 -0800 (PST)
From: Peder Pederson <pederdagreat@yahoo.com>
Subject: Beach and Boulders Chapter 3

Chapter Three
Largo -- Towards an End


	There's something to ne said for slow and easy. Many stories, many
movies emphasize the wild passionate releases of cosmic orgasms--shooting
stars, elemental explosions, wild surf. As Hal and I approach the fifth
anniversary of our commitment I can't help but luxuriate in thinking about
our love making, for we do make love. The first few months, after our first
congress, we had sex, pure and simple. That's de rigueur. There's something
to be said about that too!
	But, for me slow and easy is quite wonderful. Gently kissing,
fondling each other `til passion heats up--a passion born of love and
understanding--a passion for each other, a passion to satisfy each other is
so gratifying. As we lie next to each other, we revel in the feel of our
bare flesh touching and being touched by each other. The warm spark of love
and passion slowly, inexorably grows to an all pervasive glow that suffuses
our whole being, separately and together. Like the glow of burning
charcoal, our passion is quiet yet incredibly hot and all consuming.
	Of this kind of coupling, our orgasms are eminently satisfying. Not
screaming, cosmic explosions, but elemental blooming. I had thought of
orgasms as suddenly falling over the edge or high eroticization into the
abyss of total release. This can be true. But slow and easy is more like
being lifted on a tidal wave of passion, and erotic tsunami in which you
are ultimately deposited on the beach of sated release.
	Slow and easy brings a quiet yearning to fill and be filled. I love
it when Hal sucks my cock. I love to watch his lips move up and down my
shaft. I love the sensuous luxury of his warm mouth and throat. I could
literally lay there for hours and luxuriate in that feeling. Cumming is
never an issue during those quiet times of coupling. Once or twice while
engaged in mutual sucking, soixante-neuf, we have slipped into a light
delicious slumber. Again, once while I was sliding my cock in and out of
his magnificent hole, his legs wrapped `bout my waist, our tongues dueling
and telling each other how we felt . . . I fell asleep thus imbedded. When
I awoke I finished my erotic task, slow and easy.
	Sometimes, it's like experiencing a continuous, prolonged rush.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

	Both of our birthdays and the anniversary of our commitment fell
within a month. This year it was to be our five year anniversary, Hal's
thirty-third birthday and my thirty first.
	One morning sitting at the table having our breakfast, Hal looked
up, "Ya know, next month will be anniversary month, our fifth year, your
thirty-first birthday and my thirty-third. That's significant!"
	"Significant? How is that significant?"
	"They add up to sixty-nine! That must mean something!"
	I laughed. "Well that calls for some kind of special celebration!"
	Smiling he took his dishes to the dishwasher, came back to me, bent
over, gave me a kiss and reached down to fondle my cock. That had become
S.O.P. (standard operating procedure) with Hal every morning.
	When I got to work, I called a friend, a travel agent and asked him
to find a reasonable package, maybe the Caribbean for our `special
celebration.'" I wanted to surprise Hal. Within an hour I was called back
with information.
	"Hey Bob, found this unbelievable deal in Jamaica. It's off season
now and you can get your money's worth. It's a small resort called the
Boulders at the eastern edge of Port Maria."
	"Where in hell is Port Maria," I asked.
	"Northern coast, just across the island from Kingston. You even get
free helicopter service from Kingston to Port Maria."
	"Who do you have to fuck for that?"
	Laughing, he explained, "The resort owner also has a helicopter he
transports goods from Kingston to Port Maria. A clear deal."
	"Sure if you don't mind riding with chickens!"
	"I'll messenger you over some brochures and if you like it, just
call me and I'll make all the arrangements."
	"OK, thanks, Rick."

	Three weeks later Hal and I climbed aboard the "Port Maria/Boulders
Helicopter Service," along with a number of boxes and packages stowed in
the back behind webbing and flew to Port Maria. "The Boulders" was not a
five star accommodation, but exactly what we wanted. It made up of fifteen
`chalets' each with a large room with commodious bed, seating area, deck
and large bathroom. The tub and shower, which was glass enclosed, opened to
the sky above. The double storey main building held the lobby/reception,
dining room, `patio bar' and guest rooms. The ambience of the whole was
laid back and rather familial. You could tell that this was off season as
"The Boulders" was sparsely populated--maybe five other guest parties.
	We signed in, a perfunctory duty and was shown to our chalet by a
bare foot, Jamaican `bell boy' dressed only in cutoffs and a floral
shirt. The chalets were connected to each other by a raised, covered board
walk which ultimately was connected to the main building. The `bell boy'
unlocked the door to our chalet, stepped aside and allowed us entry.
	"Nice . . . and look at that view," I said.
	After the obligatory tour of the room's services, we tipped the
smiling `bell boy' and he left.
	"Damn! Did you check that guy out?" Hal exclaimed.
	"Couldn't help it!" I admitted, and added, "Was that a pepperoni in
his shorts?"
	Slyly Hal admonished me, "Remember . . . no touches!"
	"Aw! How about just a little squeeze?"
	We laughed.
	I walked into the bathroom, "Look at this . . . open air shower."
	"Mmmm, Just think I can climb up on the roof, peek over and watch
you shower," Hal said with a grin.
	"Or better yet, you can just walk in and join me!" came my reply.

	The next day, after a great breakfast in the dining room Hal and I
swam for the rest of the morning. In the afternoon, we explored. Walking
eastward, we followed the beach which terminated in a tangle of huge
boulders mixed with small trees and bushes. It reminded me of Langkawi. We
picked our way over the boulders and bushes.
	Hal was leading the way. Suddenly he stopped, turned and brought
his finger to his lips and pointed through a mass of leaves. There, about
ten feet below us was a small, sandy, secluded space no bigger than a very
small room. In the middle were three figures, three guys, three nude
guys. One appeared to be the `bell man', the other two were light skinned
guys, Americans or Europeans. The pepperoni `bell man' was standing there
in all his glistening, naked glory as the other two, equally undressed were
fondling and otherwise admiring the pepperoni. The `bell man' sported,
maybe not a pepperoni in length, but an enormous, dark, thick cock. As his
cock was being caressed he had grasped two hand fulls of hard cockmeat and
was expertly working them over.
	One of the guys dropped to his knees, pushed back the loose
foreskin and attempted to take that thing in his mouth. He had to open his
mouth wide in order to accommodate its girth and was able to swallow not
quite half its length before he gagged and pulled off. His companion then
dropped down and tried to do what his friend was unable to accomplish. He
to rocketed of that enormous tool. Bracketing that dark, chocolate cock
they licked and sucked from the bush and balls to the head on either
side--a long traverse. The `bell man' stood there, looked down, arms akimbo
and observed the two as their lips and tongues moved over his cock.
	The length and girth of the `bell man's' was such that in its state
of erection he arched downward, a prisoner of gravity. Nonetheless, it was
a plaything to be reckoned with. One of the guys, moved behind the `bell
man', grabbed his firm, muscular ass cheeks, spread them apart and moved
in. Obviously, he loved his ass being tongued, `cause the `bell man' bent
his knees slightly, thrust his bubble butt backward, rolled his head backed
and groaned, audibly as he was rimmed. The `sucker' reached for his pants,
drew out a tube, I assume K-Y, and started to finger his ass. First one,
then two and finally three fingers were inserted and manipulated.
	All this had its effect on Hal and me. I felt his hand reach for my
crotch. Quickly, I pulled down my Bermudas, allowing Hal free access to my
hard cock. At the same time, I reached around and untied the string holding
up Hal's shorts, pushed the waist band down over his ass and slid my hand
down that warm crack. I fingered that tight bud as Hal fondled my rigid
cock and straining balls. Thus employed, we observed the sensuously, erotic
tableau below.
	The `sucker' then applied a copious amount of K-Y to that massive,
dark, fuck tool, stood up, turned around and backed up. We could tell that
entry was not a simple task.
	"Oh! Gawd!" he gasped out loud! Obviously his tight sphincter had
been breached. Both he and the `bell man' froze in position. It was obvious
that the `bell man' had fucked a number of guys and he knew that his size
required some time for the invaded hole to relax. While frozen in that
position, the `rimmer' took the K-Y from his friend's hand and prepared the
`bell man's' hole. Apparently he wasn't averse to being fucked as he stood
there as he was fingered. The `sucker' then pushed back a bit, rested and
pushed back again. Finally, he pushed all the way back, burying that
enormous cock in his ass. He must have been an accomplished fucker with a
long rectal canal in order to accommodate that thick weapon.

	Watching that lascivious display turned me on. I am not, by nature,
prone to be a voyeur, but this spectacle was beyond belief and luxurious as
hell. My Bermudas were, quite naturally, tented.
	Hal turned to me and whispered hoarsly, "He took that whole huge
thing in his ass! that whole fuckin thing."
	Whispering in his ear, "Do you want my `thing' in your ass?"
	"Yeah! Fuck me now Bob!" and he rubbed his ass against my bulge. He
reached down, untied the string holding up his Bermudas and shoved the back
waist band over the hump of his ass. I lowered mine to mid thigh, slathered
my raging cock with a generous dollop of saliva and depositing another
equal ammount on my finger, I rubbed it against his sphincter and shoved my
finger in. Both of us were so erotisized by the tableau that were were
totally ready in every degree. I slid my cock in and began to fuck Hall
right there midst the undergrowth and boulders.

	Slowly the `bell man' began to withdraw, then reinsert his
cock. That was a signal to the `rimmer' as he crabbed up to the spread
bubble butt and inserted his cock and groaned. The `bell man' groaned
too. We watched a reverse Oreo as I began to piston Hal's luscious
hole. From time to time I would halt to watch with rapt attention, watch a
particularly lascivious action, then return to my duty as I sped up.
	Soon the fucking `rimmer' gasped and plunged deeply into that
chocolate ass, gasped again then held still. After a minute, he pulled out,
flopped onto the sand and observed his companion's ass being attacked by
the enormous weapon. At last, the fucked `sucker' emitted a loud moan and
we could see him anointing the sand with his cum, the cum of a spontaneous
ejaculation. He fell forward on that baptized sand, landing on his hands
and knees, gasping for breath.

	Uncharacteristically, I slam fucked Hal's ass as he whispered,
"Yes, yesss . . . ." The whole situation was other worldly.

	Our `bell man' grasped his pole and began to slide his hand up and
down its length, faster and faster. He sure must have had staying power. At
last, he arched his back, gasped as the `sucker' positioned his open mouth
in front of that dark cock head and accepted copious amounts of jet after
jet.

	That made me cum. I had all I could do to stifle my natural
groan. Hal did too as I felt his sphincter spasm, announcing his
spontaneous ejaculation. Quickly, I pulled out of Hal's well fucked ass,
retied my Bermudas as Hal did his and we quickly and silently retreated.

	It wasn't until we reached the beach that we said anything.
	"Gawd! That was one huge cock!"
	"Wonder how that guy managed all of it?"
	"Practice, just takes practice, I snickered. "I ought to know!"
	"What do you mean?" Hal knew what I meant! "I'm not THAT big!"
	"Certainly not as long, but just as thick!"
	"Like hell I am!"
	"Pretty close!" I admitted.
	Hal body-slammed me into the surf and ran back to the chalet
laughing.
	Walking out of the water I noticed three figures exiting the strewn
boulders, ambling towards the resort. When I entered our chalet, Hal had
stripped and was walking into the bathroom. I too stripped and followed him
into the shower. He turned on the water and aimed the shower to his well
fucked hole.
	"Now I know how you felt that first time I fucked you!"
	"Why?"
	"You've never fucked me so hard before! You were a fucking animal
in the boulders."
	"Sorry," I said as I gently kissed him on the lips.

	That night we had a leisurely supper. The menu was limited,
probably because of the season, but the food was good. We noticed that the
`bell man' also doubled as waiter. Now his uniform was a loose shirt,
Bermudas and an apron.
	"Damn!" Hal said.
	"What?"
	"With that damned apron you can't see his treasure."
	"Probably just as well, otherwise we couldn't eat our supper," I
chuckled.
	"You are probably right."

	About 9:00 that evening, Hal and I were relaxing watching CNN on
the TV when there was a knock on the door. Hal open the door and the `bell
man' stepped in carying a bowl of fresh fruit.
	"Compliments of the management, gentlemen," he said as he walked
over and srt the bowl on the cocktail table.
	Both Hal's and my eyes bulged! Rather than loose fitting, string
tied Bermudas, he was wearing white, clinging, revealing, lycra
shorts. Registering our mutual reaction, he grinned from ear to ear.
	"You like my pants?"
	"Oh, yeah," we both admitted in consort, our eyes locked on the the
outline of his opulent cock and balls.
	Frankly, I was somewhat taken back at his audacity, his
boldness. But, who am I to object?
	The `bell man's' eyes narrowed, but his smile did not lessen. Then
he slipped his thumbs into the waistband of his revealing shorts and drew
them down. His enormous, hooded cock flopped out and dangled there! It was
easily seven-and-a-half or eight inches long, obviously detumescent and the
head was covered with a generous foreskin. Veins ran the length of the
shaft, visually adding to the lengthy appearance. He had an opulent, loose
skinned ball sack in which nestled two ping-pong ball sized nuts. Gently
with his fore finger and thumb he pushed that great, loose, foreskin back
revealing a glistening purplish pink knob.
	"Damn!" I gasped as I sat there. Truly, I had never seen such an
enormous cock! Hal and I were both momentarily transfixed.
	Hal came to his senses quicker that I did.
	"Is that compliments of the management too?"
	The `bell man' smiled and was about to answer when the phone
rang. I reached over and answered it, "Hello," and looked up to the `bell
man' and asked, "Are you Amos?"
	He nodded.
	"This is for you."
	Amos stepped over as my eyes returned to that incredible piece of
manhood pendulously hanging there. He took the phone, said, "This is Amos
. . . Yes?" and as he got his message, "OK, I'll be right there!"
	Handing the phone back to me, Amos quickly pulled up his shorts and
said, "Sorry, Guys gotta go."
	He turned and walked towards the door. Hal escorted him to the door
and after a second or two, closed it, "Saved by the bell!"
	"DAMN! If that's part of the service The Boulders ought to be a
ten-star resort!"
	"You know, as he stepped onto the porch, he grabbed his normal
Bermudas that he had left on the railing and put them back on."
	"So that show was just for us?"
	"Appears to have been."
	"Do you think he saw us this afternoon at the end of the beach?"
	"Don't know."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

	Fortunately or unfortunately we were not treated to a similar show
again while at The Boulders.  But, the relict of that huge, dangling, dark,
veined cock remains in my mind. Did I desire to have sucked it? No! Did I
desire to have felt it in my ass? Absolutely not! Did I desire to have
touched it? Of course. I wanted to fondle it to cradle it in my
hand. That's all.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

	"Come over here!" I said to Hal in the half light of the setting
sun.
	"What?"
	"Just come over here."
	Walking over to where I was sitting, "What?" he said less
insistently.
	Reaching out, I softly ran my hand over the bulge in the front of
his Bermudas.
	"I know what you're up to!" he stated with a grin, "You're some
kind of damned, wierd sex PREEVERT!" he chuckled.
	`Preevert' is our own little joke. Hal once told me his grandfather
had once said of two guys living together, "They're preeverts!"
mispronouncing the term.
	"If I'm preeverted, then I'm preeverted for you!" I chortled.
	Saying that I pulled the tie on his Bermudas and they slid down to
the floor. That day Hal was going commando! He usually did when he wasn't
at work. His burgeoning, sweelling cock arched out from and over his
balls. Grasping its thickening shaft I lightly squeezed it and pushed my
hand towards his pubes, unveiling his cock head as the foreskin rolled
back. I leaned forward and encased that pulsing, pinkish-lavender,
glistening head in my mouth while swirling my tongue over its satiny
surface.
	"Oh! Damn! You really know how to get a guy's attention," he
breathed.
	Playing the role of a slut, I answered, "Honey, I want more than
your attention!"
	I licked the length and breadth of his expanding shaft and started
all over again. I loved exciting Hal this way. He could be so laid back,
except I knew the key to unlock his sensual door. When he was suitably
eroticized, he could ba amazing. He reached down and groped my crotch,
searching for my hardening cock.
	"Un huh," I vocalized pushing his hand away.
	"Why?"
	"'Cause I'm gonna drive you wild tonight!"
	"You already have," he gasped.
	"Baby, you ain't seen nothing yet!" and I went back to sucking his
delicious cock.
	"Ahhh!" Hal gasped.
	For some reason, probably the fucking and sucking play we were
treated to in the boulders, plus that huge, dark chocolate cock swinging in
front of me a few minutes ago, made me as horny as hell! For long minutes I
tongue teases Hal's Rigid, pulsing rod, then I transferred my attention to
his balls. I liked them til they were glistening with my saliva, then
returned to his cock.
	Again he reached for my cock. I stood up, manoeuvered him to the
bed and pushed him back onto it.
	Standing between his legs, I untied my Bermudas and let them slip
to the floor. My cock stood rigidly at attention. I wagged it at him.
	"I wanna suck your cock!" he rasped.
	"Un huh," I said as I shook my head.
	"I wanna suck YOUR COCK," he demanded loudly.
	"Nope. You only have one choice tonight!" Saying that I turned and
rubbed my ass cheeks lasciviously. Oh, I was really playing the slut
tonight!
	"Then come here, you preevert and sit on my cock!"
	"Nope. You gotta work for it!"
	Hal lunged for me. I dodged him. He lunged again and I again evaded
him.
	We started to laugh at the scene we must be presenting--two grown
men running about with raging hard ones, playing tag! Laughing
hysterically, I finally flopped on the bed, on my back, legs spread. Hal
fell on top of me, pinning me down.
	Reaching over he whispered in my ear, "I love you Bob Cavanaugh,
you crazy, demented preevert and I'm going to make you pay for this in the
most delicious way imaginable!"
	"I was hoping for that!"
	Lunging for my cock, he quickly swallowed my whole length.
	"Ohhhh!"
	Then reaching for the K-Y, Hal started to prepare my tightened hole
for the invasion of his turgid, tumid dick. Automatically, I lifted my legs
and brought my knees to my chest. The sensation of his hot mouth on my cock
and his fingering of my ass never failed to prime me for a good cocking. He
shoved a pillow under my ass, elevating it, placing it at the most
advantageous height and angle for his lusty, pulsing prick's attack.
	Hal had always been aware the the girth of his cock was something
that I needed ttime to accomodate and become comfortable with. Slowly I
felt the rose-bud shaped cock head penetrate the outer gates of my tight
ass and I gasped from luxurious expectation. Slowly, oh, so slowly he
pushed that thick-bodied love muscle into me! When he was fully seated, in
to the hilt, plumbing my depths, I wrapped my legs `bout his waist and
locked my ankles. This I did automatically and without conscious
volition. It was a non-verbal signal to start his slow withdrawl and
repenetration, in and out, in and out.
	"Oh! Gawd, I love how you make me feel . . . how you feel in side
me," I groaned out loud.
	"You like my cock in you?"
	The giggling play of minutes back was now replaced by serious love
making, pleasuring and giving pleasure.
	"Oh, yes. You fill me with so much passion."
	I squeezed my sphincter as Hal started on of those slow thrusts
inward.
	"Ahhh! I love what you do with your ass!"
	"I love what you do with your cock!"
	Reaching over he kissed me deeply and I drew him further into me
with the pressure of my heels pushing on his flexing, muscular buns. For
long luscious minutes we continued this primordial dance. Then slowly
	Hal pulled out and whispered, "Turn over and lift your hot ass."
	I complied, hugging the pillow, pulling my knees up towards my
chest and elevating my ass. Hal crawled up behind me placed a hand on my
hip and with his other hand aimed his glistening cock toward my quivering
hole, and entered me again.
	"Ahhh!"
	"Oh! I love to watch my cock pushing into your delightful hole
. . . stretching it over my shaft!"
	That was a position I luxuriated in too, looking down as my hard,
sensitized cock pushed in and out of Hal's hole. He started to slam fuck my
ass, plunging into the very depths of my being. We both groaned.
	Stopping and falling over onto my back and bringing his lips close
to my ear he whispered, "Do you know something?"
	"What?"
	"I love you."
	This was a decaration we had first made years ago, but one that
never fails to warm my heart when he tells me. He tells me at least once
every day.
	Clutching me, Hal rolls our united bodies `til we are on our sides,
spooned and starts to fuck me again.
	"Oh, I love this," I murmur as he pushes in and draws way out only
to plunge in again!
	"I love fuckin your ass."
	"I love you fucking my ass," and I bring my top leg way up in the
air and grasp it with my arms.
	Hal throws his top leg over my thigh, torques and draws his bottom
knee up to my waist `til he's stradling my thigh, kneeling ove my thigh. He
takes my raised leg, wraps his arms around it for leverage, and with a
conserted thrust of his hips, jamms his substantial, hard, throbbing cock
back into my depths. He starts pistoning my ass.
	"Oh! Gawd!" he gasps, "I love fuckin your hot hole . . . while my
ass . . . rubs against your . . . hairy thighs."
	"Yeah! Fuck my ass with that big cock of yours!"
	And, did he!
	Again, he pulled out and took my legs and dragged me to the edge of
the bed, thowing the pillows on the floor, he knelt on them, put my legs
over his shoulder, wrapped his arms around my knees and slammed back into
me with unerring accuracy. Then he began to increase his speed. This was
the position I loved the best as his hard, thick cock inevitably ran back
and forth over my inner know and always brought me to a screaming orgasm.
	"Oh, Fuck me Hal! Fuck me good! Fill me with your hot cum!"
	I could feel me mounting that luxurious tsunami of release. Then
suddenly . . .
	"AAARRRGGGHHH!" and also "AAARRRGGGHHH!"
	Hal collapsed on me. I dropped my legs to the cloor, bracketing
Hal's. Panting we embraced each other.
	"Gawd! That was phenomenal!" Hal rasped.
	"Yeah! That it was!"
	"Ya know something?"
	"What?"
	"My cock feels so good, do comfortable in your ass, I don't think I
ever want to move it!
	"OK with me! I love the feel of you in me."
	"Bob, why do you turn me on so much."
	Smiling, "'Cause you turn me on, you preevert."
	Hal smiled, wiggled his ass which transmitted its movements into my
ass via his encased cock. I flexed my sphincter and my ass muscled.
	"Damn! How do you do that?"
	"You like it?"
	"Oh, yeah!"
	Kissing him I flexed my muscles again.
	"Mmmm!" and Hal flexed his hip.
	Lifting my head and looking directly at him, I asked "Are you
getting hard AGAIN?"
	He just smiled and thrust again.
	"Yup! You are,! You insatiabale preevert!"

	And ever so slowly, we made love again. This time without changing
positions.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

	A month after we returned Hal came home looking beat.
	"What's the matter, Honey?" I asked.
	"Ahhh, just felt I had no energy."
	"Do you have fever," I asked as I felt his forehead, and answered
my self, "Nope."
	"Just have a bug, I guess."

	A couple of days later Hal complained of the same listless feeling.
	"Maybe you should see the doctor," I suggested.
	"Yeah. If I don't feel any better tomorrow, I will."

	The next evening Hal came home and announced, "Went to the clinic
and saw the doctor."
	"What did he say?"
	"Not much, sent me to the lab. They took some blood. Gawd, I hate
that! Supposed to see him tomorrow afternoon for the results."
	"Want me to go with you?"
	"Naw. It'll be OK!"

	Late in the morning, the next day, I got a call from Dr. Anderson,
our physician. He had been our physician since we made our commitment.
	"Bob, could you take some time off and meet with me and Hal this
afternoon, 3:00?"
	"Yeah, sure. Is there a problem?"
	"Let's discuss that when you get here?"
	A dark presentament descended upon me.
	At 3:00 I arrived in the doctor's office. The nurse said, "Go right
in, Hal just got here."
	When I entered, Hal looked up, "What are you doing here?"

	"Hodgkin's Lymphoma!"
	It hit us like a sledge hammer! I was totally stunned. Hal was a
bit more sanguine.
	"It's cureable?" he asked.
	"In the early stages, there is a considrable success rate."
	"And, what stage am I at?"
	"Well, it looks pretty good, but I wish we had caught it earlier."
	"So, I'm not in the early stage?"
	"We can't be sure. There seems to be some systemic involvement."
	HAl and i sat and looked stunned at each other.
	"I'm sending to an oncologist, a good man. He can tell you more."
	We were immediately taken to the oncologist in the clinic.

	Hal was immediately admitted to the neighboring hospital and I
leadenly went home. There I broke down and cried for an hour. Later, I
administered some Visine to take the red from my eyes and drove back to the
hospital. Hal looke wan and was alreasy hooked up to an intervenous drip.
	"You OK?" he asked.
	"Yeah, but more importantly, are you OK?"
	"Felt better," he answered with a grin. "You know how I hate
needles?" and added with a wink, "There are other things that I'd rather
have stuck inme!"
	"You're so bad!" I chuckled.
	"I know, but woud you rather have me any other way?"
	"No way Baby."

	Two days later Hal was released. We talked long hours in the warm
confines of our apartment, discussing every possibility. Strangely enough
we were incresibly calm. Guess we were in a state of shock.

	Two months later we got the devastating news that the chemotherapy
was not working. The prognosis was grim, but he was still kept on
chemotherapy, hoping that some new concoction would take hold.
	The chemotherapy wracked his body, causing uncontrolled
gagging. Nothing seemed to work. I woke up one night and Hal was not in the
bed. I got out of bed and looked in the bathroom. He wasn't there. I raced
down the hall and noticed that the guest room door was open. He was curled
up on the bed. Quietly I snuggled up to him and held him in my arms.
	"What are you doing?" he asked sleepily.
	"Sleeping with you."
	"I'll keep you awake!"
	"I don't care! You are my love and I want to be with you."
	Hal never left the warmth of our bed again. Many nights we would
simply talk quietly as I held him in my arms.

	We were able to hire a nurse to stay with Hal during the day. An
able young man from the local hospice. From 5:00 in the afternoon `til 8:00
the next morning, I attended to his needs.
	Irrevocably, I watched the man I loved waste away.

	Two months later Hal passed on in his sleep. I had to live on! In
one sense, I was lucky as I had long months to prepare myself for his
passing. Still when the time came, I was devastated, desolate, absolutely
bereft. The few short years we spent together was a time of joy and total
commitment. Now my life was empty, a void.
	If I thought that my breakup with Aarman was difficult, this was a
hundered times more traumatic. I didn't want to survive. Yet, I did.