Date: Sun, 12 Jun 2011 08:01:06 -0400
From: S Smith <mheast111@hotmail.com>
Subject: I'm Not Gay Am I? Chapter 16

Warning: The usual disclaimers apply here. If you don't like any of the
following, leave now: gay sex, vulgar or harsh language, etc.

This is pure fiction. No one in this story is a real person, living or
deceased. Please do not copy without my consent.  Please practice safe sex.

I'm Not Gay? Am I? Chapter 16


I laid there quietly the next morning.  I could feel his skin next to mine,
and I didn't want that moment to end.  I woke up without regret, but a ton
of fear.  Fear that when Jeff opened his eyes and remembered everything we
had done.

I didn't think about me and what it alll meant.  The fact is since the
first day I met Jeff I was sexually attracted to hiim no matter what I did
to resist it.  Resisting had left me tired and exhausted.  I couldn't find
it anymore.

No words had been said after the sex other than his comment about planning
to break up with Lori in the morning.  I really didn't know what that had
meant.  After all I hadn't given my ass to him with a demand for more.
Part of it actually felt great to think Jeff may associate our fuck with
something more committed.  But a bigger part of me was repulsed by the idea
that he would think if we fuck we become a couple.  Hell I didnt know what
a couple of guys fucking was?  I mean seriously, just because we fucked do
we become some couple?  That concept freaked me out.

But what I did want was more of this.  Of sex with Jeff.  Of waking up in
bed with him instead of across the room watching him sleep and waiting for
the moment the sheet would slip low enough and show off his body to me.

I looked over at my bed and wondered if I should go to it.  If that would
make things better.  Staying in bed with him felt amazing, yet he could
freak out when he wke up and realized what we had done.  After all Jeff is
sexual.  Very sexual.  How did I know if I was just another hole for him to
shove his cock? Maybe we were supposed to pretend that Mr. Macho Ladies Man
Jeff never put his dick up my ass.

The panic over took me.  I slowly, inch by inch crept from his bed and went
to mine.  I turned my back to him and hid.  And waited.

About 25 minutes later I heard him stirring and his mattress creak.  I
wanted to flip over and watch.  To see his cock again. To look at his body.
At his face and see where he and I stood with everything.  But I couldnt
turn.  Instead I laid there quietly and hoped with all my might that I
would feel my bed move and his warm body wrap around me with the stiffness
of his cock at my ass.

Instead I heard the sound of denim rubbing against skin as his pants pulled
up his body Then I heard the tug of cotton rubbing against his skin and I
knew he had pulled on one his tight shirts.  Then the sound of his book
bag, along with the jangle of keys attached to his gym bag.  More rustling
as he filled the bags and the door open and close.  Jeff was gone.

He hadn't even showered, so obviously he was intent on getting out of our
room quickly.  He never took both bags when he left so he didnt intend to
come back anytime soon to the room.

I looked over at his empty bed.  The place where it all had finally
happened.  Where I got what I had wanted for so long.  Jeff fucking me so
deep and hard. My ass throbbed with soreness and my skin felt rough with
the dried cum on me.  It seemed like a dream.  From one second fucking Nate
to minutes later begging Jeff to fuck me, which he did so well. I shivered
a bit knowing just how gay this all was.  That I had begged for cock and
was no better that that fag Nate.  But yet I didn't feel bitter and
hateful.  I just felt an ache that Jeff was gone.

I moved in a daze that day, going around campus to my classes and working.
I rarely if ever crossed paths with Jeff on campus except at the gym so my
heart flipped when I saw him in the dining hall.  In all the years of
college I had never seen him there.  But there he sat at a table.  With
Lori.  Laughing and smiling.  Without a care in the world.  He never
flinched, never looked my way.  Not even sure he saw me, as I sat there
trying to swallow my food but my eyes constantly going back for quick
glances.  Watching how they happily interacted. Not like a guy breaking up
with his girl.  Not like a guy who had just fucked his male roommate.  But
like two young lovers in college.

I got my answer when they put there used food trades on the conveyor belt
and started to walk toward the doors. Their hands clasped together.  Jeff.
Mr. Fucking Womanizer was acting like a high school boy, holding hands with
some girl!  It wasn't only me watching at they proudly strolled to the
doors showing off their relationshiip to everyone.  It seemed like everyone
was watching.

"What a fucking douche!" Nate landed in the seat across from me.

"Who?" I said, sounding like an idiot since everyone in the hall was
probably talking about Jeff.  Jeff and Lori.

"Your fuck head roommate.  Or should I say last night's fuck buddy?" Nate
said and winked.

I shrugged my shoulders.  It was all I could do since I felt like all the
oxygen had left my body.

"So you guys finally fuck and the next day he runs to his girlfriend.  So
fucking typical," Nate said and grabbed the apple from my try and took a
big bite out of it.

I ate silently and looked at my plate.

"So how was it?  Did he fuck good?"  Nate mumbled low enough so other
around couldn't hear.

Again I shrugged in reply.

"Not going to give the details huh?  Come on Eric, don't I fuckin deserve
it considering how you left me hanging?!"

"What do you want to know," I mumbled in reply.

"How was the fuck?!" Nate said, his voice a bit louder.

"It was good. Okay.  It was fucking good!" I said, and glared in his eyes.

"Better than me?" He asked.  I looked down immediately.

"OH! Of course! With him you were the bottom!  No fucking closet jock will
take it up the ass on their first time!  So you had my role!  Hard to
compare the sex then huh?" Nate said and laughed his infectious way.  If I
didn't feel like shit about Jeff and Lori I would have laughed wtih him and
enjoyed how correct his words were.

"Well too bad you didnt fuck his brains out and show him how good it can be
taking cock!  But from the looks of it, you and your roommate had a one
night fling since he is obviously tight with Lori now.  Just watch. Jocky
Boy Jeff will all of a sudden be all into Lori now.  It is the only way
those closet gay boys can handle the truth."

"Just because Jeff and I had sex doesn't make us gay or a couple," I
mumbled in reply.

Nate's laugh was loud and echoed in the dining hall.  "Fuck you. You are as
gay as I am and I suspected all along Jeff is a closet case. Oh well, at
leat you showed him how good it can be for one night.  Since he is back to
straight now, you need some relief today?  I think you owe me," Nate said
and winked again.  Damn he was cute.  Always so cute and flirty.  But
nothing like Jeff. I doubted I could ever have sex with Nate again after
the incredible time I had with Jeff.

Jeff never came home that night.  The next day was my heavy class load day
when I was always out of the room by 6:30am.  So he waited till I was gone
to come home and shower and change.  I altered my gym schedule to avoid
seeing him, and worked out alone in silence.

Three days passed and I never saw him.  The torture was too much.  I
finally relented one of the nights and moved to his bed naked and jack off
with the smell of his body in the sheets and one of his used jock straps
laying on my nose and mouth.  It wasn't enough.

I knocked later that night on the door to my relief.  Nate was more than
happy to see me.  He was more talkative than normal was we fucked.  He told
me over and over how I could come to him anytime.  That I should forget
about Jeff and be with him.  That Jeff was a fucking idiot.  I came and it
did feel good to shoot my load deep into Nate's tight ass.  But it wasn't
enough.

The fourth day Jeff and I did end up in the room togetherat the same time.
He traded out dirty gym clothes from his bag and replacing them with new
ones.  We never spoke and went separate ways.  I went down to Nate's again
and fucked him immediately after.  The fifth night alone in my room I
called Nate at 3am and asked him to finally come to my room.  We have never
fucked there before but I needed to end the memories of Jeff.

As I pumped my load into his bowels I felt numb.  I was looking at Jeff's
empty bed and not feeling my orgasm.

A pop sound came from Nate's ass when I pulled out my dick, and he stood up
and turned. His cock was rock hard and he needed to finish.  I knew
instantly what to do.

I lowered to Jeff's bed and spread my legs wide and looked back at Nate
staring at me in shock.

"Fuck me Nate," I said calmly.

"Eric are you sure?"  He was a mix of fear and excitement at the
opportunity to top a man.

"Yeah, shove your cock up my ass," I said and turned and put my head on
Jeff's pillow.

The thrusts were exactly what I needed at that moment as my eyes closed to
visions of Jeff and the smell of his body in the sheets.  I screamed into
the pillow my frustration and excitement and begged for more.  Nate was not
good at it but he had a decent size cock and it worked my ass well enough.
Seconds later I was full of Nate cum.

I finally decided the next day that even Nate could not feed my need for
Jeff.  I had to confront him no matter what.  It was too much torture
avoiding each other.  I knew he trained a couple different guys on campus
in the gym during the day.  It gave him extra cash and he certainly enjoyed
hanging in the gym and pumping his own body betwen session.  I knew his
schedule very well so I got changed into my workout clothes and timed my
gym arrival for the last 30 minutes of one of his training sessions.  This
time he noticed me when I came through the door because of the way he
looked over and seemed a bit shocked, but looked away.

I knew that no matter what he may be, straight, bi or gay, that my body
turned him on as much as his body got to me.  I peeled of my tank top and
pumped weights in only my tight running shorts that were so small the round
curves of my ass showed. I worked out on the machines just far enough away
to seem indifferent and close enough to let him get the views he needed.
With only a jock strap on, my ass was available for viewing as I bent over
with the weights hoping to show off enough ass cheek to remind him abut my
pucker hole that he had filled so well. I knew it was gay and sick to be
acting like that, but I no longer cared what I was doing.  I just had to
get Jeff to acknowledge me.  To come to the room with me.

At the end of the training session his geek client went out the door and
Jeff grabbed up his bag too leave.  I couldnt wait any longer and took the
chance.

"Hey," I said and stood in front of him blocking his way between two weight
machines.

"Hey," he said in reply and started to dig in gym bag.  I grabbed the bag
from his hands violently and tossed it to the floor.

"What the fuck," he said and glared at me.

"Are you going to avoid me for the rest of the year?" I said quickly.

"I'm not fucking avoiding you! I've been busy!  What the fuck is your
problem?!" he said defensively.

I stepped forward till my bare pecs touched his sweaty tshirt and shoved so
that he had to step back.  "You cant handle it can you?  You wish it never
happened don't you?" I said, admitting my fears.

"Shut the fuck up," he said and took another step in reverse away from me.
I stepped forward and hoped that my closeness bothered him as much as my
cock twitched with desire for him.

"You liked it, Jeff. You liked fucking me and you need to fucking admit
it!" I said with anger.

"Shut the fuck up!" he said through gritted teeth in reply.

I stepped forward and shoved more.  "You wanted me that night and you know
it.  Stop fucking avoiding me and come home and fuck me!

"You idiot, shut up!" he said with his face red in anger and glanced around
the room, his face full of fear that the other dudes in the gym could hear
us.

"Admit it Jeff, you liked putting your cock up my ass!" I said, caught up
in the sexuality of the moment. There we were, two muscled jocks in the
college weight room, with the clanging of weights from the other men around
us, having a stupid gay argument.  But I didn't care.  I had to get to him.
To get between his legs.

In an instant his hand grabbed me and tossed me in a complete circle. I
slammed against the gym wall and he stepped close enough so our chest
touched and his breath covered my face.  He was furious, but I didn't care
because the violence made my cock harden. I wanted him even more.

"Listen you fucking, faggot! I am not gay and that never fucking happened
so forget about it!  Go fuck Nate, pussy!" he said quietly with his hard
edge voice.

In that second the world disappeared.  Instead of his words of refusal we
stood there, two men caught in a moment of anger melting into lust.  Our
testosterone raced because of the fight, but in that second the hormones
enveloped us and our eyes went from rage to intense desire.  Instantly his
hard body was no longer a weapon but a god of male sexuality.  Our chest
heaved with our deep breathing but it was no longer about anger.  I licked
my lips and said softly, "Come to our dorm room, Jeff."

He leaned in closer till our lips were only seconds from touching.  His
hand circled my waist and I reached with mine and gripped his sweaty hard
biceps.  "What the fuck is happening to me," he said softly in reply, his
eyes moving back and forth from my eyes to my lips.

I leaned in and circled my hands around his waist feeling the hardness of
his muscles. We moved closer with only a hair distance between our open
mouths. "Jeff," I said involuntarily as our crotches brushed together and
Our faces moved together for the kiss we ached to share.

"What the fuck?!" The voice behind Jeff broke the moment.  We stepped from
each other and looked at the burly hairy guy in a tank top who was moving
to the weight machine next to us.  From the look on his face it was a
apparent he had seen our moment.

We didn't say anything as Jeff quickly grabbed his bag from the floor and
moved to the doorway.  I grabbed my tishirt and pulled it down over my
bulge and followed out the door.  Outside not a word was spoken as we both
walked in the sunlight toward the dorm.  I had no idea what was about to
happen.  I didnt know if I had done the right thing or not but I ached to
kiss him again. "Jeff..,"I said and stopped on the sidewalk.  He stopped
and turned and we looked in each other's eyes.  I realized at that second
it was the very location I had been that night so long ago with Steven.
The night I had been kicked and hit into unconsciousness. All because
Steven and I had kissed.  And here I was and I knew at that moment it was
worth the risk again.  I had to.

My bag in my hand slipped to the pavement as did Jeff's.  I glanced quickly
and no one seemed to be around except for a few people on the hill over by
the science building.  We stepped into each other's arms against and
without hesitation our mouths met. Our tongues wrapped together and I knew
we were finally together again. WE moved switfly into the bushes along this
sidewalk and let our hands take over rubbing and clutching at each other as
we devoured each other's mouths.  Only the sounds of our moans escaped
us. As quickly as we had started the moment it ended and we both moved
swiftly to our bags and headed to the dorm room.

Silence filled the room as we stared at each other once we were safely in
our dorm room together.  Seconds crawled by before he stepped to me and
violently grabbed me around the neck.  The tightness of his hand frightened
me but I didn't care because he was at least touching me.  "We are not gay,
Eric.  You know that don't you?" he said with anger.

"Jeff, all I know I fucking want you!" I said quietly through the grip on
my neck.

In a fury of movement he stepped foward and our lips ground together in
passionate lust.  We kissed with the hunger we had for each other after
waiting so many days for this.  Hands roamed our bodies as we ground
together and separately only long enough to undress each other and grasp
cocks.  The hunger to touch and feel each other's cock was a desperate need
in both of us!  Shirts ripped as we tore them from each other and moans
escaped involuntarily from our mouths as we kissed and stroked cocks.

"Oh fuck Jeff, I fucking want you so much," I begged as I sunk to the floor
and worshipped the meaty thick cock I ached for.  Like a slave to his
master I held in my two hands and feasted on it.  Its thick hardness filled
my mouth as I sucked and he moaned out my name.

"Eric!  Fuck Eric, suck my fucking hard cock!" he moaned as I moved my
fingers around and gripped his hard ass cheeks and played with his smooth
pucker hole.  My fingers gave him the signal of what I wanted because he
turned and eagerly bent over and pulled his cheeks apart giving me full
access to taste his sweaty smooth hole.  "FUCK!" Jeff screamed out as I
rimmed his ass.  I knew from the last time together he loved his ass been
eaten.  After several minutes of feasting on his hole we moved silently to
the bed and I got in position.  I willing put my legs up on his shoulders
and nothing was said as we moved directly toward our goal.  He spit on his
cock and stroked it to full hardness as I stared in his eyes and whispered
to him.

"Jeff, I have wanted this for so fucking long.  From the first moment I met
you, from the first morning I saw you naked, all I have wanted was for you
fuck me"

"You want it Eric?" he said and smiled at me.  In the broad daylight of the
room I almost felt out of body and looked donw at us.  Jeff and I nude and
about to fuck.  I didnt care.  At that moment I would be a faggot, a gay
boy, a quee, whatever the fuckin label was it didn't matter because Jeff
wanted to put his cock up my ass. Nothing else mattered.

"YES! FUCK ME JEFF!" I said and he shoved his entire cock up my hungry
asshole.

THe thrusts were intense as he leaned in and kissed me.  I loved ever
second of his hard cock violating my hole over and over.  With each thrust
I wanted more, I wanted his entire cock to fill my body.  Flashes in my
mind came, each a visiion of Todd whne he had fucked me like this.  That
night I gave into my sickness and let myself feel the pleasure of a man and
I was finally feeling it again.  We fucked for several minutes until I
turned and pulled his dick from me and got on all fours like a dog in heat.
He shoved himself back inside me adn held my waist for leverage as he used
my hole for more pleasure. Only moans and whispers of our names came from
us until finally he screamed out "I'm gonna fucking cum, Eric!"

"Shoot it up my ass Jeff!" I screamed in reply and a second later my bowels
filled with his hot cum! My cock burst for with a stream of hot cum
splashing across his pillow and sheets. Volley after volley of cream filled
my ass until we collapsed on his bed together, his body on top of mine, his
cock up my ass and us laying in my cum.

Afterwards we laid together and kissed.  Cum coated us but we no longer
cared.

"What the fuck is happening to me," he whispered and kissed my neck as his
hand lightly ran up and down my chest and abs.

"Let's not think about that.  Lets just enjoy this," I said and kissed him
back on the neck.

"Don't worry, Eric.  It's too late now for me to think about it anymore.  I
just fucked a guy.  Can't change it now," he said and we kissed mouth to
mouth without hesitation.

"Jeff, tell me you won't avoid me.  Tell me you will fuck me again
someday," I said.

"Yes. I am done with Lori. No more. I want you instead," he said, grabbed
me and urgently kissed me.  Then he showed me that he knew what he was
doing.  His kissed moved down my neck to my pecs and to my cock.  He sucked
and showed me he loved cock as much as me. Minutes later I was fucking his
willing mouth and whispered my warning I was about ti come, but my macho
"straight" roommate never let my cock go.  He eagerly swallowed as my cum
filled his mouth.  Hesmiled up at me after as drops of cum hled at the
corners of his mouth.  "I think I fucking love your cum, Eric."


Give me your thoughts or requests. I am responding to reader requests and
giving a bit more of Eric's story to you.  If any of you have specific
requests please let me know. You can email with your comments, questions,
or whatever. Send them to mheast111@hotmail.com.