Date: Wed, 26 May 2004 07:10:14 -0500
From: Joshua Jimmy Tan <joshua_jim@email.com>
Subject: Matt My buddy!

This is the story of myself and it is true in every part and if any one
found it too offensive, please leave!


My name is Jimmy which is my real given nickname, my folks called me Mii!
Most of people were talking about me that why I have not been married
yet. There are lots of reasons but one of the main is that am gay! Just
to let everyone know that I am seems to be difficult as the whole world
has to go for it! Pity but there is nothing for me that I can do! I
didn't know when it began but since I remember this is what I am! I have
been living like this for nearly 32 years by this July. At the end of the
day, I have nothing to say but just to state that am here on my own! Just
a bit hard but this is what I am and I can't change it though! In my
life I had fallen in love with too many friends who don't know that am
gay! They are all straight but I did try once or more with their private
parts when we slept together or near each other, I meant in the same
compartment! But one of the most remembering friends that I really fell
in love with him, his name is Matt and this is how the story began.


I was hanging around in one of the tourists' street in Thailand where
all the backpackers are and there is one pub, more likely to every
English pub where there is pretty quiet music, most of guests talk and
play pool! So I had been hanging out that pub for sometimes and I am the
one who wouldn't start talking to others before they do! So most of the
time I was enjoying myself and didn't expect to have anyone beside me or
would like to be proposed or approached! But there was one night, I was
looking for a place to sit and there was a seat available, there was one
white guy on that table earlier before I started to sit. Then I did sit
there and started to have a bottle of beer and listened to the music,
checking out people around me! Didn't talk to anyone though!

Then he started talking to me, surprised but we kept talking, he was
saying that he just arrived and on his way home and didn't know where he
should be headed? I was kind of lying to him that I was waiting for my
friends to join me in but I haven't got anyone that came! So, I
suggested him to go to another place close by, we drank couple of drinks
and he suddenly started to flirt with the Israeli girl who just arrived
at the pub, and then I was really disappointed and thought that he liked
me, that's why he started talking to me! They kissed and they were
trying to get together! The Israeli girl is gorgeous and she got her hip
like big melons in her pants! I was not wondered how Matt liked her!
Unfortunately they didn't work out! I was surprised myself as well that
Matt was not able to convince her to his room! Matt is gorgeous himself,
with 6 feet tall, white with goatee, long hair with great face and smile!
I have never thought that I would like the long haired guys but here he
is the most gorgeous man I have every seen! Well, the night went over and
we were parted! But before we did, I gave him my mobile number there and
tell him that if he is interested to go to hard rock cafe, please call
me! When I came home that night, not sure how many times I was imagine of
him when I was sleeping! The next day, I almost gave up before he gave me
a call, and we went out to HRC together. The night went really well as
normal straight guys would hang out! Then we were parted again as he
would have to make a trip to the island near by and I had to work during
that week. But he said to give me a call before his return to BKK and we
shall go out again. I said why not? He called up and we made it up to
meet at one of the best hotels in Thailand for a meal on the top floor of
the hotel where you could see the whole view of BKK from up there! The
night also went really well, nothing happened! We ll, time when he has to
fly to Australia where he came from and I was still working in Thailand
that time.


Time flies, it has been nearly a year since we met, here I am now in
Belgium, close to where he has been working-Holland! Well, I called him
up and saying that am now in Europe to work and he just hopped up to see
me the weekend after I arrived! Nothing still happens but he stayed in my
house which was not really completed that time, we still had the twin
bedroom, the master bedroom was not finished when I moved in, so
basically we shared in the same room. We went out on Friday night when he
arrived and we came home nearly three on Sat. I was too tired as I
didn't do anything and I was thinking that it would be too hard as I
don't want to lose a friendship I have with him. On Sat's morning, I
cooked for breakfast and we had it, the day went really easy and fell
into the night again, we went out to the local discotheque close to my
house. We didn't plan to drink that much, especially me who was driving!
But th e place he liked it very much and we just kept drinking and
drinking! Till 4 AM and we came back, Matt was actually drunk and so was
I! Well, we both didn't take shower or so, just went straight to sleep!
I couldn't sleep, just thinking a lot what to do! But I guessed the orgy
inside me just made the decision to proceed in what I really wanted! So I
went over to him, as quiet as I possibly could! Trying to put the blanket
away, Matt and I both were on boxers but I had my shirt on, he didn't!
So I opened up the blanket and was trying to find my way to his private
part! Until I found it and trying to open his boxer which I finally did!
My word, he is cut, I never seen the cut guy before but I couldn't see
it as the room was too dark but I could feel it with my hand! I decided
to move my face down to his public hair and finally my mount to his dick!
I was so afraid that he would wake up! He didn't at that time, guessed
the alcohol has made him to sleep still! Lucky me! So my mouth was on
his dick and trying to suck him as slowly as possible and I was feeling
that his dick was growing! It kept growing and he suddenly moved and felt
like he was awake and saw me! Oh my god! I have broken our friendship! I
said quietly sorry to him, not sure he heard that and I came back to my
bed and continued my sleep!


I woke up middle of the next morning feeling like someone was trying to
push me aside and I thought to myself what the shit! I woke up and I
couldn't see clearly as I was drunk as well. It was Matt, sleeping
beside me! Oh my god! I didn't know what to do, I just stayed still for
a while but felt like hours! I decided that if he woke up and saw me
sucked his dick, he moved and now I guessed he would like me to proceed
in what I had not done! I was wrong, I was trying to touch his barely
chest and tits but he pushed my hand away, I thought what that was? I
finally gave up and slept on the floor instead! And that was it!

The night went on, we both woke up in the morning and didn't say
anything, and he finally said that what went wrong with me last night as
I was sleeping on the floor! I lied to him that he was too drunk and
crawled up to my bed and tried to push me away and he bought it! So I can
still keep friendship with him from now on! I don't want that to happen
again, I guessed that friendship is what I want the most and I still keep
this with me for as long as I remember! Matt, I love you mate!


Jimmy