Date: Mon, 4 May 2015 13:33:29 +0100
From: Alain Mahy <amahy1957@gmail.com>
Subject: Peace at last 4

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It took Joe about two hours before he came down for his coffee.

- You should have woken me, he said.

- You looked like an angel and as I aw you almost finished the book, I
guessed you would need your sleep.  Besides, there is something really
important that happened.

- What is that?  Joe asked.

- You slept alone and the nightmares didn't appear.  If they had I would
have heard you screaming and your eyes would have a dark circle around
them!

Joe came to the realization that indeed he had slept alone, even if it was
only two hours, and had not had nightmares.  The smile on his face got
brighter with the second.  He came over to me and hugged me and then kissed
me.

You see the effect you have on me?  Joe asked.  There is no doubt at all
that we were meant to be together.  Who knows?  Maybe, this is a sign from
Chuck, giving us his blessing.


*****


The fact Joe mentioned Chuck's blessing hit me full face.  We had never
talked about it, but we were discovering another common point: we both
believed that left this world, never left us completely.  Of course, they
stayed in our hearts and we marveled at the capacity of the human memory.
But it was more than that.  We were convinced the spirit of the deceased
stayed with us if their task on earth was not completely finished.  We
strongly believed we all had a task when we were born.  Some people have a
task by dying, even if it was just to make the living realize what they
lost.  Every living being will encounter others.  Each and every person we
meet has a purpose.  Some have big purposes, other small ones, but all of
them help us to be who we are.

Joe had finally found peace after Chuck's death.  The first thing that
helped him was the fact that he realized that Chuck had had no time to
suffer.  That grenade that landed just in front of him had not left him
time nor to think neither to suffer.  He was dead the moment it exploded.
That idea alone helped Joe a lot.  Not only Joe, but also most people
around us, had seen people suffering from illnesses such as cancer, but
also from other elements that can make a person suffer such as loneliness
or missing someone who had gone.  Joe had told me that Chuck loved the army
and even if the circumstances were not always the best ones, he would do
everything asked as long as he was convinced he was defending his country.
All in all, Chuck had died doing something he loved.  That was the second
lesson Joe learned.

Joe didn't need his psychologist anymore.  Bit-by-bit, our conversations
helped him see things that were hidden before.  When Joe needed it, I was
always listening to him, without being judgmental.  Joe knew that and
appreciated my patience.  For me it was the most natural thing, as I knew
it helped him recovering a normal life.  He often told me that he had the
sensation Chuck was close to him, almost touching his shoulder.  The first
time he told me that he asked me if I thought he was crazy or weird.  I
told him that I didn't think so; on the contrary, I was sure Chuck was
really there and probably touching him from wherever he was.  When I told
him that, his eyes got as big as saucers.  We were soon talking about the
mysteries of the spiritual world and its power.

We had the opportunity to assist some conferences and performances of
mediums.  Joe had that sixth sense that told him immediately it the person
doing a reading or pretending to connect with the world of spirits, was
fake or not.  Most of the time he didn't even have to see the person.  Just
entering the premises he felt the presence of spirits or not.  Sometimes it
was weird, but I learned to trust his intuition and with time he showed me
his intuition never failed him.

Chuck's blessing!  I liked the idea and crossed my fingers that Joe was
right.  I had fallen in love with Joe quite quickly, even if it had taken
months.  From that moment on I learned to know Joe and even if it sounds a
clichˇ, I loved him more every day.  From the day Joe had mentioned
Chuck's blessing, he was even more open than before.  He didn't withhold
anything, being it that he was happy or sad.  Joe became my "psychologist"
pushing me (softly) to open up and tell him what I felt or experienced.
With each conversation we came closer to each other.  We vowed to never
have secrets for each other, and sometimes it was difficult, most of all
when I wanted to surprise him with something.

After months of assiduous searches, we found an editor and publisher of
Chris' books.  We had presented the two books about the gardening first.
The guy was even more enthusiastic than us.  He even suggested publishing
it with the original handwritten form, not typing it.  Well, not exactly,
as they created a font based on Chris' handwriting.  Once it was printed,
it was difficult to make the difference.  All of John's drawings were
scanned in high resolution and reproduced, respecting the original book.
The final name was "Grandpa's Gardening".  The first print was ten thousand
copies.  Believe it or not, but the second print was effective only a month
later and was increased to twenty thousand copies.  At the end of the first
six months, over fifty thousand copies had been sold.  Our editor, Brad,
was insisting on having more books and create a series of "Grandpa's ...".
When we showed him the six books of cooking, he went wild!  The layout of
Grandpa's Gardening was held, as was the cover, the font and the scanned
drawings.  The six books would be sold as a package, in a nice cardboard
box.  "Grandpa's Cuisine" went into printing and fifty thousand was the
first amount of copies.  The marketing specialist of the publisher would
have preferred "Grandma's Cuisine" but Brad insisted that a man wrote the
books and that it had to be respected.  He also argued that most of the big
chefs in the world were men.  "Grandpa's Cuisine" reached incredible
figures and was in the Top10 list of most bookstores.

At the moment of paying the royalties, I had to prove I was the only heir
of Chris and John.  Fortunately I had kept their will, because otherwise I
would have had a problem.  I had kept my personal bank account and Joe his,
but we had put up a joined account for our daily costs.  I asked the
publisher to transfer the money to our joined account so that Joe could
equally enjoy the extra money coming in.

Joe got the notification that he was officially on sick leave till his time
was over in the army.  That day, his sick leave would be converted in his
retirement.  It was obvious that from then on, together with the profits of
the books, we were financially secure.  We had not to worry about our
future.  But the most important part was that Joe slept well.  The
nightmares disappeared completely.  But the past, even you can't change it
anymore, sometimes keeps following you.  Joe got a call from Chuck's
mother.  How she got his number was a mystery to him, but despite of that,
he was happy to hear her.  The poor woman had lost her only son in Iraq and
her husband dies of natural cause.  That made her feel very lonely and she
had decided to sell her house and go to live in service flats.  As he went
through all her things, because the service flat was a lot smaller than her
house, she had found some of Chuck's belongings.  One of the things was an
old picture from the day Joe and Chuck left for Iraq.  That brought too
many bad memories to her but she wanted to know if Joe wanted the picture.
She would send it to him.  Joe gave her the address and wished her well
before hanging up the phone.

A few days later the picture arrived by post.  Chuck's mother was not
familiarized with computers, scanners and e-mail.  When Joe had the
envelope in his hands, I saw his hesitation to open it.

- Nobody obliges you to open the envelope right now Joe, I said, you have
time and I would really like that you feel ready for it.  Chuck has been an
important person in your life, but you also know that it could bring back
bad memories.  Despite of that, I think it would be good for you to see
Chuck, as he was, not the last image you got of him.  His mother told you
it was taken before you flew out to Iraq, so I guess it will be a smiling
face.

Joe was hesitating a few minutes more but then opened the envelope and took
out the picture.  He had a smile on his face looking at it.  I guess I was
expecting tears or sadness, but not at all!  He showed me the picture and
it was indeed beautiful.  Both were wearing their battle dress and had
wicked grins on their faces.  Yes, they were still thinking that they would
go and give those SOBs a hell of a time.  They looked confident and even
happy.  I immediately thought of framing that picture and put it on the
mantle piece below the picture of Chris and John.  Joe thought it was a
good idea when I mentioned it.  We bought a simple wooden frame, similar to
the frame of Chris and John's poster, and put the picture in its place.
The first days following that, I could see Joe looking at the picture, deep
in thoughts.

- You can't imagine how much I would like to have a last conversation with
Chuck, Joe said one morning.  There wouldn't be a lot to say, but just
getting the confirmation he was not in pain and assuring him that I loved
him deeply.  It would mean the world to me hearing him say he gives me his
blessing for our relationship.

We had seen various programs on television and assisted to enough
conferences to know there were people pretending they could communicate
with people that had died.  I suggested Joe to do a search on the Internet
and see if he could come up with something.  As he had his sixth sense
about those people, he would very quickly know if what he found would be
valuable or not.  From that moment on, Joe was glued to the computer
screen.  Hours in a row he would search the Net and check out hundreds of
Webpages of people pretending to be able to communicate with the spirits.
Most of these pages were discarded almost immediately, but one in
particular got all of his attention.  He called me over to where he was
sitting and was excited like a kid who had found the perfect toy.

- This page, he said, and the picture of that woman, are giving me good
vibrations.  I don't know why, but my intuition tells me she is for real
and has real contact with spirits.  When I opened the page and started
reading, I felt Chuck's hand on my shoulder once again although it has been
a very long time since I last felt it.

On that page there was a tab allowing people to contact the woman.  Joe
immediately wrote a short e- mail, asking to see her at the most convenient
time for her.  He didn't mention Chuck.  He didn't mention the way he died
and not even his relationship to him.  He just asked for an appointment.

Two days later he received an answer, telling him that she actually lived
in England and that, if it was convenient for him, she was expecting him
the next Friday at two in the afternoon.  She mentioned that she couldn't
guarantee any contact, but that she would do her very best.  If there was
no contact at all, she wasn't expecting him to pay anything.  She also
mentioned that her fees were what people were prepared to give her or what
they could afford.

We traveled on the Thursday to London Heathrow.  From there we took a taxi
to a hotel that was close to the woman's address.  We checked in and went
to bed early.  Joe wanted to be fully rested for this encounter.  Although
Joe was one nervous wreck, he slept well.  I didn't!  I was so concerned
about Joe and wondered if this whole trip was worth it.  What would happen
if in the end the woman was a fake?  What would happen if there was no
contact at all?  Would Joe be able to accept it?  Would his disappointment
bring back the nightmares? I was worried sick for him.  I loved him so
much.

We were awake and up early.  We had a good breakfast, as Joe wanted to be
in top form.  We even went for a run to get rid of the nerves.  We ran
about half an hour more than what we were used to.  Once back in our hotel
room, we showered together, but Joe was not in the mood for any games.  We
just washed each other and than dried each other off.  Joe looked about a
hundred times to his watch.  In normal circumstances, time flew by, but now
it was as if time stood still.  Around one Joe wanted us to go already.
From what I had seen on the map, a taxi would bring us to the woman's house
in less than ten minutes.  I begged him to have a little more patience.

At two minutes to two, we rang the woman's bell.  She opened herself.  We
recognized her immediately, as we had seen her picture on her Webpage.  We
were asked to come in and led to her living room.  We had expected to be
received in a special room or an office of any kind, but she said that was
not necessary.  She felt comfortable in her own space and didn't mind to
receive people in it.

The first thing that she did was asking Joe to put his hands in her.  She
rubbed his hands for a while and was apparently concentrating.  After that
she sat comfortably in her easy chair and started talking.

- There is a young man coming forward, but I can't see his face.  He says
hello to both of you, although he has never met you (pointing to me).  He
says he is fine and that his going away was quick and painless.  He
chuckles and says it took him by surprise.  He is happy to see you are fine
now and was so sad to see you suffering.  He was not responsible for your
nightmares.  He says you did it to yourself, as you didn't want to let him
go.  He was with you all of that time because you held him close.  He was
called several times to let go of your hand, but you held it.  He says the
angels helped him to make you meet your friend here.  It was only then that
he could walk towards the light.

Joe's eyes were moist.  There was no doubt that woman was in contact with
Chuck.  She went on.

- He asks why you haven't even looked at the back of the picture his mother
sent you.  There was a message for you there.  By the way, he loves the
frame.  He says he will watch over both of you.  You need each other more
than you can imagine.  You are meant to be together as it was the work of
the angels.  The love you feel for each other is heavenly made and nobody
will be able to destroy it.  Oh... I can see his face now and he has a
bright smile on it.  He wishes you a safe trip back.  He will never forget
you because you were his first and only love, but he wants you to live to
the fullest.  For him it was a short passage among the living, but he knows
now that his task was to make you discover who and what you are.  He is
standing right behind you know.  His hand is on your shoulder.

Joe instinctively reached his shoulder as if he was actually feeling
Chuck's hand again.

- He laughs!  He says you have felt him before when he touched you.  He
wants you to know that he will do it again and it will be a sign of
protection.  He wants you to be happy and says that you will if you stop
being stubborn and finally open the box you keep hiding for everybody.
There are a few things in there that will bring back good memories.  He
blows kisses at both of you and gives you his blessing...

The woman suddenly kept silent.

- He is gone now.  He was surrounded by a reddish light, which confirms to
me that he loved you very much.  I would even say you are fortunate to have
had him in your life.  Don't mourn his death, but celebrate his life.

Joe had a single tear rolling down his cheek, but a happy smile on his
face.  From all Joe had told me, I knew that that woman had really been in
contact with Chuck.  There was no doubt about that.  She then stood up and
made us understand the session as over.  It had been quite short, but so
intense.  Joe was calm and even serene.  Joe had prepared an envelope with
money and gave it to her.  She didn't even open it in our presence.

Once we were out of her house, Joe took me in his arms and kissed me
passionately.  We didn't care if anybody saw us.  Nobody knew us here
anyway.  We walked back to the hotel as the weather was nice and the
temperature pleasant.  I didn't say anything.  I wanted Joe to assimilate
what had happened in that woman's living room.  He had received the answers
he was waiting for.  He had not had the possibility to have a real
conversation with Chuck, but he was at peace.  Walking down the street, Joe
took my hand in his and our fingers intertwined.  I had that good sensation
that he wanted the world to know we were together.

We enjoyed a nice pint of English lager on a terrace, bathed in the
afternoon sun.  We did some window shopping and had a nice meal in a Thai
restaurant.  Before going back to the hotel, we had a last drink in a nice
gay club in Soho.  We didn't want to make it too late as we had our flight
the next morning at eleven.  Reaching the hotel, we went up to our room and
took a relaxing shower.  In the shower, with the water cascading over us,
Joe let his hands roam over my body.  I took his face in my hands and
kissed him sensually.  Our tongues danced in our mouths and announced some
very soft and tender lovemaking.  Once dried, we slipped between the sheets
and resumed our kissing and caressing.  The fact Joe had received Chuck's
blessing was immediately noticeable.  His kisses were more passionate, his
body was more relaxed and his lovemaking was more determined.  I was
overjoyed.  His lovemaking meant so much to me because it made transpire
his general mood.  The way he showed his tenderness was spectacular.  He
made me feel the most special person in the world.  The way he did it I was
convinced I was.  And he was for me.  Chuck's message was as clear as
crystal water: our love had been created in heaven, by the angels.  No
human being could ever destroy it.  I believed those words, because Joe
showed it to me in every kiss, in every caress.  For the first time in all
the time we knew each other, we came simultaneously, experiencing an orgasm
as if it was the very first one: powerful and intense.  When I turned to
spoon Joe, my cock found its way in his crack.  It was still hard enough,
although I had climaxed, to enter him.  Joe pushed his hips back into my
crotch as to feel my cock as deep as was possible.  That was how we fell
asleep, content and satisfied.

In the morning we made our bags and checked-out.  We had some time for a
quick breakfast and going to the airport.  We went to check-in our bags and
saw a strange look on the face of the girl behind the counter.  She was
babbling to herself more than to us, but we intercepted words like "sorry"
and "overbooking".  Suddenly Joe whispered in my ear.

- Don't worry!  Chuck is touching me.

And that's when a supervisor of some kind came to stand next to the girl,
looked at the computer screen and was apparently looking for a solution,
when a smile adorned her face and she addressed us in a friendly way.

- Sorry gentlemen, we are facing an overbooking, but we found a solution
that I am sure you will appreciate.  You will be upgraded to first class.

I looked at Joe who was smiling broadly.  Spending the complete flight in
first class instead of economic was something we would not argue about!  We
were handed our boarding passes and were even invited to use the facilities
provided to first class passengers.  As soon as we were seated in the
plane, a flight attendant offered us a glass of Champagne telling us to not
hesitate if we needed anything, winking at us as if to say he knew we were
a couple.

We had the most cool and relaxed flight ever.  We marveled at the leg space
we had, compared to what we had in economy class.  We were served a warm
meal!  It was not yet "Haute Cuisine" but it was very good and even better
because it was served in china and not a plastic tray.  Except when the
food was served, we held hands the entire flight.  Our connection was
getting even stronger than before.

Arriving home, Vivian was, of course, waiting for us.  She looked at us
before we had said a thing.

That trip was really worth it, she said, even if I don't know how it went.
I can see you are both a lot happier now!

We invited her to have a drink with us in the living room and told her what
had happened.  She was sincerely happy for us and we could see it on her
face.  It all felt so right.  Joe took the picture on the mantle piece and
took it out of its frame.  He turned it around and read:

"You are my best friend and whatever happens, I will always be with you.
Live your life!"


Valentine's Day 2015.  Joe and I are now almost fifteen years together.  I
can't tell you how happy we have been.  We were blessed with a wonderful
life.  Joe is now officially retired from the army.  Our books are selling
like cupcakes.  Vivian is still with us and looks after us like a real
mother.  We redecorated the house and followed Chris' example, writing a
notebook about everything we did.  Joe followed some lessons about drawing
and his professors said he has real talent.  He's taken over John's part of
the work, illustrating the new book: "Grandpa's Decorating".  Joe made me
read Chris' book about the sexual activities.  It didn't teach me a lot of
new things, but one thing was the main idea of the book: when you make
love, do it with all your heart or don't do it.



All comments welcome at amahy1957@gmail.com