Date: Mon, 31 Jan 2000 02:00:38 GMT
From: Wayne Patrick <wppsd@hotmail.com>
Subject: gay/beginnings/searching for a son 4

Disclaimers:  Please see them in the first chapter.  You know if you should
be here.
Feedback is important to me as this is my first story.  I welcome comments
and suggestions for the plot line.  Let me know how far these guys' story
should go.  Thanks to those of you who have written.


They finished dressing, and walked out of the motel room, around the corner
and into the parking lot where Stephen had left his car the night before.
They got in and drove down the highway to a breakfast restaurant Joey had
suggested at dinner.  They parked and walked in.  They put their name on the
list for a table, but as they turned to sit and continue their conversation,
Joey turned into the one person he really didn't want to see at this moment.

"Mom! Hi."

******

Chapter 10

"Joey, honey, what's going on?  You said you were spending the night at a
friend's house.  Why aren't you at work?  Who is this?"

The color drained from Joey's face.  He had never, in his whole life, run
into his mother while he had been out with friends.  Why now?  How was he
going to explain any of this?  His mom had no suspicions about his love
life.  Hell, yesterday at this time, Joey had no love life.  Where do you
start when you have to tell your mother that you're gay, and you're in love,
no less, with a man you just met last night.  And you have to do this in a
room full of strangers.  The first thought Joey had was the consolation that
they hadn't been doing anything that he would have to explain.  What if they
had been holding hands?

"Mom, ... uh ... well, ..."

Stephen sensed Joey's panic.  He stepped in.  "Excuse me, but why don't we
step outside and talk.  They can page you when you're table is ready."

He graciously held the door to the restaurant open as Joey's mom and Joey
exited.  Stephen put his hand on Joey's shoulder, behind him so that his
mother could not see it, quickly mouthing, "I love you, I'm here."  He
patted him to let him know that, from this point on, Joey would never have
to tackle any problem alone.

They stepped outside to a wooden bench that faced the ocean, next to the
front door of the restaurant.  None of them sat.  Joey, supporting himself
on the back of the bench, was visibly shaking, his mom was staring at him,
wondering what was going on, and Stephen was thinking how to approach this.
He had not come out himself, so it wasn't like he could relate to this
situation.

Stephen broke the silence.  "How do you do.  I'm Stephen Andrews."

"I'm Ruth Thompson," Joey's mom began quite tensely.  "I'd say I'm pleased
to meet you," trying to be gracious, "but at this point, I'm not really sure
that I am.  Who are you and what are you doing here with my son?"

"Mom," Joey cut in.  This was his battle, and with Stephen at his side, he
was going to take it on.  "I met Stephen last night at the Sandwich Shoppe
and we found we had a lot in common.  We've been talking all night, helping
me sort some things out in my head."

"All night?  Where DID you stay last night?"

Big breath.  "At Stephen's hotel room."

"His hotel room?"  Ruth's eyes turned to Stephen, sharply scanning to see if
any guilt showed on his face.  Had he touched Joey?  Had he hurt him?  She
stared at Stephen, but wasn't going to see anything as Stephen calmly looked
at her.  He could read the look on her face, knowing what was going through
her mind.  Child molester.

Turning back to Joey, "You could have come to me, baby.  Are you in any
trouble?"

"No, Mom, I couldn't.  I'm not in any trouble, and I've not done anything
wrong.  I just found somebody I could talk to, and someone who listened."

"So what is it that you couldn't come to me about?"

Another big breath.  "I'm in love."

"You couldn't come to me to talk about being in love, but you could talk to
a stranger you didn't know?  I'm a little hurt.  Who is she anyway, do I
know her?"

"Mom, that's the problem.  It's not a she.  It's a he."

Ruth eyes widened, and her hand grasped the back against the bench.
Fortunately, she was able to hold her composure.  If the bench had not been
there, she surely would have just fallen.  She didn't think that Joey had to
capacity to fall in love yet.  It obviously hadn't been talked about in the
house.  She figured that he would be at least 30 before he ever figured out
what was going on.  And then he would get married and have children.

The three of them became eerily quiet again.  The only sound was the nearby
waves.  Those waves that normally sounded soothing and tranquil to all of
them, sounded powerful and angry, smashing and crashing down, just like Joey
felt his life was doing right now.

"I don't know what to say," breaking into tears.  "What did I do wrong?"

She looked down to the ground, slowly shaking her head, as if denying what
she had just heard.  She flashed back in her mind, looking for the clues
that she must have missed through the years.  Her mind pictured a little
boy, racked with grief at the sight of his father lying in a coffin.  She
saw him as he was growing up, now realizing that he never showed an interest
in girls.  She remembered the times he came crying because of the ridicule
he had received from his schoolmates as he grew up, the times he had been
picked on, ostracized, or even beaten up, coming home a couple of times with
black eyes.  The arguments and yelling, back and forth, between Joey and his
step father.  She sat down on the bench, opening her purse to pull out a
tissue, wiping her eyes, the mascara running to her temples as she tried to
dry the soaked eyes.

"I'm sorry that I did this to you.  I just tried to raise you the best I
knew how."

"Mrs. Thompson, please do not blame yourself.  From what Joey told me, you
were a good mother.  I know your life was not easy, being a widow so young.
I don't know that you could have done anything differently."

"But that doesn't change the fact that my son just told me he's a fag,
homosexual, whatever."

"No it doesn't," Stephen said.  "But then again, maybe there was nothing
that you `could have done' to change anything.  I don't think that changes
the love you two have between you.  If anything, he needs you more now."

"Mom, I need to do what's right for me."  Joey was now emboldened by
Stephen's stand for him.  "I've been a good kid all my life.  I followed the
rules.  But I was miserable.  I thought that was because of everything
happening around me.  But Stephen helped me to see that it wasn't only that,
but that I was miserable because I was denying who I really was.  I thought
about running away from home, I even once thought of killing myself, but you
taught me to see that that was not the way to go.  I've watched you, how you
carry yourself.  I can't say I have a lot of confidence, but you did teach
me that when you're backed up against a wall, you fight it the best that you
can.  I didn't realize that my life would lead where it has.  You know that
I've been saving all my money to go to college.  That is my future, and
Stephen has been so good in helping me understand that my leaving does not
mean I love you any less."

Ruth Thompson took this all in.  Never before had she seen her son so
confident.  Her tears never really stopped, but she understood what Joey
meant.

"I don't know what to think right now.  I do know that your step father will
kick you out of the house if he hears of this.  He is too old-fashioned to
allow any of this under his roof.  What will you do about that?"

Joey's speech had taken all of his energy.  Now it was Stephen who would
step forward for the first time to protect his love.

"Mrs. Thompson, I am the man your son loves.  Yes, we only met yesterday,
but we know that we will always be there for each other.  I know Joey would
have spoken to you this weekend, but your running into us changed things.
And your statement about your husband quite honestly scares me.  I love Joey
with all my heart, and I will do anything to make sure this boy is safe from
any harm.  Please let me take him and let him live with me.  I promise that
I will love him like a son, and maybe soon we can sit down and talk.  You
and I have a common interest, what's best for Joey.  I want him to finish
his education, just like you do, and I'll do whatever it takes to make sure
that it does."

"Why should I trust you?  I don't even know you."

"I may be a stranger to you, but not to your son.  He is a wonderful young
man and he and I understand each other because we have so much in common.
You don't have any reason to trust me.  I have to earn your trust.  I will
not do anything to your son to hurt him.  I love your son.  Please believe
me."

"Joey, what about your job?  You don't just walk out of your life."

"First of all, Mom, I quit my job yesterday.  Mr. James and I never got
along.  I couldn't take his crap anymore.  We were on our way to get my
paycheck when we stopped for breakfast.  And as for my life," he said,
looking lovingly at Stephen, "I know where my future is.  Mom, I love
Stephen and he loves me.  Right now, I want to share my life with him."

"Well, I guess you're grown up enough to make your own decisions.  I can't
say that I'm happy for you because I think you are making a mistake.  And
this is a choice you can't take back.  Your step father is out for the day,
so it might be best to go now and get your things.  I can't believe you are
going to be gone from my life.  I know he'll never let you in the house
again, but I still want you to keep in touch with me.  You're my son.  I'll
always love you."  She kissed him on the cheek.  Turning to Stephen, she
said, "Mr. Andrews, take care of my baby.  He's the only one I've got."

Joey had talked about his step father last night, so they knew that Ruth was
right about never going home again.  His mother's statements confirmed that
the house he grew up in would become a forbidden place.  But Joey was
willing to pay what he considered a relatively small price for the love of
this man.  He still had his mother's love in his heart and that was all he
really needed to take from here.

Stephen and Joey didn't bother to eat breakfast.  They left immediately for
Joey's house to get as much done as they could.


Chapter 11

They pulled up in front of the house Joey had lived in for ten years.  It
was an unassuming house in a quiet neighborhood.  Driving over, Joey was as
nervous as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs. He wanted to get out of
there as fast as possible.  He flew up to his room, opening his closet and
pulling out a duffle bag.

Stephen followed up the stairs, entering Joey's room as Joey backed out of
the closet with his gear.  He noticed the room was sparsely decorated, some
plaques Joey had received in school, but none of the usual accessories found
in a boy's bedroom.  No posters of models, rock stars, or athletes.  Plainly
decorated, reasonably neat, with just a bed, a desk, and a bookcase.  To
Stephen, it really didn't look lived in.  He knew that when they were
settled, Joey would not want for material things.  He probably wouldn't ask
for them.  But he would have them.  Stephen would make sure he never wanted
for anything.

"Just grab the clothes you need.  If you have anything special, grab those
too.  Anything we can't take with us, I will gladly buy for you.  I want to
get everything for you because I love you."

"Thanks."  Joey stopped his work to quickly hug his man.  "If I had my way,
the one thing I would like is not to take something, but to leave something.
  I would have loved to leave the scent of our lovemaking in this room.  Now
that I'm moving out of this room, I realize that you were the only thing I
ever needed in my bedroom."

He went back to work, moving quickly through the drawers of his dresser.
Clothes, a few certificates, his high school diploma, and a book of
photographs.  He threw a few paperbacks into a box with other things from
his desk.  He looked around one more time and reached to the top of his
bookcase.  From there, he took an 8x10 black and white photograph of a
soldier in his military uniform, and after wiping the dust off, placed it in
the box with the books.

"I don't have to guess who that is, do I?" asked Stephen.

Joey just looked at Stephen, choking up and shaking his head no.  No words
were needed, the tears said everything he needed to know.

Stephen hugged Joey, trying to kiss away his tears,  "He was a handsome man.
  I can see so much of him in you.  No wonder it was so difficult for you to
replace him.  I hope you give me a chance to try."

"Everyone said he was the greatest man.  My uncles and some of his friends
that I met have told me stories of how he was the best.  As I grew up,
everyone did say I looked like him.  I felt that I was being compared to a
god.  That wasn't easy to live up to."

"If you've got everything, we can leave when you're ready.  I remember that
it was so difficult to walk into my house after the accident.  The memories
haunted me.  I just had to get out of there.  I think you need to get out of
here now."

"I'm done.  Let's go."

They loaded the two bags into the back seat of Stephen's car.  As they were
pulling away from the house, a white pickup turned in the driveway.  Joey
looked in terror at the face of the driver, who in turn stared at the boy
sitting in the passenger seat.  Joey started crying and begging Stephen,
"Please get me away from here.  I'm scared."

Stephen reached across the car, as Joey grabbed his hand, locking their
fingers.  Joey held it to his heart, the same as he had done that morning in
bed.  He shivered, but was calmed by Stephen's steady voice, "Take it easy,
my love.  You are safe with me and we are together now and forever."

They drove back to the motel and carried Joey's things into the room.  They
laid on the bed, Stephen holding Joey tightly, discussing what they should
do now.  There were things that had to be done before that could begin their
new life together.  Joey still had to get his paycheck from Mr. James.  And
they had to pack everything in Stephen's car for the trip back.  They
decided to get Joey's paycheck first.  That would be the easiest.  Go in,
grab the check and get the hell out.  But when they walked into the Sandwich
Shoppe, someone was waiting for them.  This would not be easy at all.