Date: Sun, 12 Dec 2004 17:07:31 -0800 (PST)
From: Bill Thomas <hottoppop@yahoo.com>
Subject: Senior Moment, Part 18

In a minute or two, all three of us lay intertwined on
the floor.  Hands and mouths explored body parts and
openings.  I turned to see Carlos watching from the
doorway; he was jerking off.

"Get over here Carlos.  Get over here."  Mike ordered.

Carlos shook his head, "The class is back teacher;
there is no time."
Carl, Mike and I stood and headed for the locker room.
 "They are all in the showers.  Maybe we need to join
them."  Carlos offered. This time I shook my head and
headed for the door and home.  I had had all the
emotional stress I needed for a life time.  I now felt
exhausted, used and disappointed in Mike and in
myself.  I needed to be alone.  I wanted to talk to
Charlie.

Damn, I could not put that burden on him.  For the
first time in two years I truly felt alone.  I walked
along the beach; the sun was warm and it was quite
mild.  I finally dropped to the sand; tears came.  "No
damn it!  I'm not going to start crying at this point
in my life.  God, someone, help me figure this out!"
I shouted into the wind.

I had not noticed that Tran had followed me.  "Maybe I
can listen to you, Bill."  He was there beside me.  "I
am a good listener and I have lived many lives."

I began talking to the waves.  I asked questions of
myself about what had been going on over the several
days.  I tried answering my own questions.  I began
with the first time on the beach with Mike; I talked
about the times with Paul and Carlos, I touched
briefly on my questions about Charlie.  Tran held my
hand hard in his.  Finally, looking into his deep
brown, wide, eyes, I asked, "What is happening to me
Tran?  What have I started and where am I going?"

"I am not a psychologist; I am not an expert.  Let me
ask this:  Can you walk away from this now and would
you wish it had never happened?"

I murmured "NO."

"Then we must move forward.  I shall say that you have
had much happen to you in a very brief span.  Perhaps
if it had not happened so quickly, it would be easier
for you to accept.  We all have choices.  Yours is to
stay here and be part of Mike's life and part of
Charlie's life.  I think he is in love with you and
does not know it or accept it.  I think that deep down
he recognizes a bond with Michael.  I am certain that
they are either grandfather and grandson or uncle and
nephew.  Charlie's step mother will find out which.  I
also think that Mike will move on to love another..."
Tran stopped.

"If it is as you think, then Charlie will be very
angry with me.  That I would find very hard.  I think
Charlie and I are just friends; I do love him but not
that way.  I woulds not want to come between you and
him."

Tran chuckled, "Mr. Bill, I long ago stopped being in
love with Captain Charlie.  I love him now.  Paul
loves him too; we three love each other.  That is not
what I am talking about.  I believe that you love
Michael; he is too young for you to be in love with.
You do not wish to admit what is in front of your
face; you love Charlie."

"OK, let's drop that."  I smiled.  "What about the
violence today; it was rape or almost rape.  I am not
a violent man; I hate force of any type.  Yet, I was
so excited."  My cock began to rise as I remembered.

"My friend, you are a man.  You are all man.  Just
before he left, I asked Charlie what he found in you
that was so attractive. He told me that you were the
most comfortable person inside his own skin that he
had ever known.  He went on to say that there is no
pretense in you, no macho posturing, no guile and
little anger and no meanness of spirit.  You would not
hurt Carl, Carlos, Paul, Mike or Charlie if you could
help it at all, nor would you see them hurt.  You are
also rather naive.  You are not bad looking either."
His hand let mine go and closed on to my cock.  "You
need to stop looking for answers and let them come to
you."
He began to massage my neck with his other hand.  "Let
me help you relax.   Keep your eyes closed, please; I
am going to undress you."

I laid back into the warm sand.  Tran began to work
his hands on my face and head.  They then traveled
across my chest and down my arms.  He worked one hand
and then the other.  Finally they were back on my
chest and then down across my abs.  I had never
experienced anything quite like this.  The pressure
from fingers, thumbs and palms changed constantly as
did the length of touch.  Tran did not go near my
throbbing cock which was now as hard as I had ever
known it to be.  Instead, he worked on my thighs and
then, between thumb and forefinger he took the skin of
my scrotum and began moving it in circles.  The
sensation was exquisite.  I could feel pre-cum
dripping from me.  Next his hands were on my thighs
and then down my legs.  I have no idea as to the
length of time we had been there.  Tran worked next on
my feet.  I am ticklish but there was not that
response.  I was about to open my eyes and once again,
he said softly, 'Do not open your eyes."  He lifted my
legs so that that my thighs formed a right angle to my
ass and my calves and feet were parallel to my back,
extending out.  I felt something wet on the souls of
my feat.  At first, I thought it must be his tongue.
Then, I felt something else wet on my cock.  Tran was
gliding his wet cock against my feet and either his
hand or his mouth, it had to be his mouth from the way
it felt, closed on my now throbbing cock.  In seconds,
I exploded ropes of cum.  I felt Tran do the same
against my feet.  I looked.  Tran smiled at me.  His
wet hand continued working my cock as his worked
against my soles.  The sensations there traveled up
into my groin and I continued spurting.  "I must taste
you"  Tran whispered and I spread my legs and his head
went down onto my belly and my cock went into his
mouth.  I continued to cum as one hand went to my
balls and a slick finger on the other played with my
ass ring.  I did not go down.  Instead, I began to
pump myself deeper and deeper into his face.  Gasps of
pleasure came from deep within me.  In just minutes, I
began to climax again.  When I finished, I took his
head in my hands and held him still.  I could not
stand for him to keep moving on me.  He reached for my
hands with his and lifted them away and then he raised
his face to mine and we kissed.  I could taste myself
on his lips.  "Mr. Bill, you are sweet and you are a
very sweet man.  Do not change and do not look for too
many answers.  They will be provided to you in time.
Ask the spirits for wisdom and for patience.  I love
you: I hope you, I want you to know that.  We shall
talk again."  He stood, quickly dressed and began to
walk back towards Charlie's house.  "Rest here for a
few more moments.  I shall send Michael to you.  Be
patient with him, do not scold him.  What he did today
he inherited from his family.  He will learn to deal
with the violence in himself.  I am sure of that."  He
bowed to me and I returned that gesture.

I dressed myself and then, closing my eyes, I
collapsed back onto the beach.  My body felt like it
had partly melted into the sand. I did not think.   In
a few minutes I felt something or someone block the
sun.  I opened my eyes to see  a person in silhouette;
his body was surrounded by the light.   At first I
thought Charlie and then I remembered.  It had to be
Mike.  "Son, sit here with me."

"Dad, are you furious with me; are you upset about
what we did?  I am."

"Mike, I can't say that I understand all that
happened.  I'm not sure I ever will and I don't think
I want to do it like that again.  Obviously, I
received pleasure from it.  My cock head did the
thinking.  I think yours did too."

"I can't excuse myself so easily.  I needed to prove
myself in there; I chose a bad way to do it.  I
violated him.  It's a good thing he wanted it or
decided that he wanted it.  I give you my word, I'll
not ever do that again."  Mike was so sincere.

At this point, I smiled.  "You promise you won't ever
fuck another guy or that you won't get angry or that
you won't force yourself on anyone?" I asked.

Mike smiled back, "All three if that's what you want."

"Did you like the feeling?"

"Yes, Dad. I liked it.  I really liked it."  Mike
laughed out loud.  "I Liked fucking."

"Just don't think you can do that to me.  If I ever
want that, I'll let you know.  We can talk later.
Right now, I need a shower. "

Looking at the wet cum spots in my shorts, Mike
replied, "I can see that; I wonder where he's been?"
He helped me to my feet and with his arm around me, we
went home.