Date: Sun, 26 May 2002 05:25:27 -0500
From: jimmy allen <ja1331@yahoo.com>
Subject: Someone in my life part 6

			Someone In My Life Part  VI

			      by: Jimmy Allen

Well this is part 6 and the last of my story. Let me know what you think of
it at ja1331@yahoo.com. I know its been a while since the last chapter. I
had this chapter ready to go but then had computer problems and I lost this
chapter. I was so upset by it that I just didn't want to do it all again. I
remember it all tho so it should be easier to do it again. Well here
goes.

_____________________________________________________________________

This story is about teens who let fate take them to each other. It is
purefiction and maybe a part of my fantasy. There is some sex involved
here, so if its not to your tastes or your underage then please leave
now. This is my first story so email your comments to me at
ja1331@yahoo.com. I will reply to comments but flames will be ignored. I
hope you like this story.
________________________________________________________________________


I laid there for a long time just holding his pillow. My poor dick was up
and ready to go. He always had that effect on me. I decided I needed to
take care of the poor thing. I started to stroke it while holding his
pillow. It was not the same as having him there, but it was making me feel
good anyway. It had been to long since I done this. Since A.J. came into my
life I had no need of doing this. We could take care of each others
needs. But now that he was gone I guess I would have to take care of this
little problem. My mind kept wondering and thinking of him. I was really
going to miss him.

The next thing I remember was waking up in the morning. I had to pee so bad
I jumped out of bed. As I was peeing I started thinking back to last
night. Thats when I remembered what I was doing and am sure I never
completed the task at hand. Wow I must have been tired. I don't ever
remember starting something like that and then not finishing it. Oh well, I
will just have to do it in the shower. I decided I had things I needed to
do so I would take that shower and then get started with my day. I grabbed
a towel and put it on the sink within easy reach. I adjusted the water and
got in. Man that warm water sure felt good. I grabbed the soap and started
lathering up my whole body. Of course I started to get hard again. I
decided that now was as good a time as any to do it. I started to stroke my
dick again. After only a few minutes I felt that old feeling coming
across. It seemed to start in my toes and worked all the way up to my
head. Before I could even react I had reached the point of no return. I
started shooting all over the place. Wow I had never cum this much in all
my life. Of course what was I thinking. It had been, what, a couple weeks
since the last time. I had forgotten how good that can feel. Of course it
still feels better doing it with someone, but you take what you can get. I
finished the shower and got out. After drying myself I went to get changed.
After hugging his pillow one more time I went to get me something to eat.

Having dressed and eaten I decided I needed to go get some things. I
started at the grocery store and then Walmart's. I didn't need much and had
that task done in no time. Taking the stuff home I noticed the answering
machine was beeping. Damn I hate that thing.

I listened to the messages. There was only two. The first one was junk and
the next one was interesting. It was from A.J.'s boss. He said he needed to
talk to me as soon as possible. He wanted me to call him when I got
in. Geez I wonder what this is. I had talked to him once since that day but
only cause he had called me. I knew the guy, and we were friends but
nothing special. In fact I kind of didn't really like him for some
reason. It was nothing he ever did, it was just something about him I did
not care for.

Well I decided I might as well get it over with so I dialed the
number. When he answered the phone we had our usually small talk. Then he
said something that made me speachless. He said that as part of the health
insurance that A.J. had with the company that there was a life policy that
went with it. He says that he had been in touch with the company and had
been told what needed to be done. It seems that since A.J. was now gone the
policy had to be paid out. Since I was the beneficary, I had to sign the
paperwork and then the company would send me the check. I was speachless
for the longest time. I never even knew anything about this. A.J. never
mentioned it. I was begining to think that he had made a mistake. I started
to question him about it. He said that no, it was true, that in fact the
other two people that were killed already had their papers signed by the
beneficaries and was just waiting for me to sign mine. He was going to give
them all to the company at the same time. He said it wasn't that much, but
I was entitled to it. I told him I would be there in a little while and
would see him then.

After hanging up the phone I sat there in total disbelief. How come I
didn't know about this. I mean I could use the money, but I had no
idea. The more I thought about it the more I was confused over it. I
decided I had to talk to Scott or Peter. Maybe they could make heads or
tails of this. I called their number and listened to the phone ring. After
a couple rings the machine came on. Oh no, not again. After its message I
started to tell them that I needed to talk to them. To call me as....

"Hello?" Scott had picked up the phone.

I told him hello and asked him if he was busy. He said well he was, but not
now since I had interupted them.  I had to chuckle a little.

I told him him well good get Peter over to the speaker phone cause I had
something to talk about. Scott asked if all was ok? He knows when I call
and say that, then that means something is wrong. I assured him that all
was well that I just needed to talk to them. Thats what I liked about them
two. You could talk to them at anytime about anything. I waiting a few
moments then heard the phone click to speaker.

Peter said "hello, how are you Jimmy"?

I told him I was fine but something had just come up and I wanted their
opinion. They both sat there and listened why I went on about the
conversation I had with A.J.'s boss. They seemed to think it was a good
thing. They were so glad for me. It took them a couple of minutes to relise
that I was not as happy about it as they were.

Scott goes "whats wrong? You know you can use the money".

I go yes I can, I guess, but you seem to forget A.J. had to die for me to
get this money. If it was up to me I would rather not have it. I would
rather have A.J.

Peter then says " Jimmy, you know thats not possible. You know even tho he
is gone he is always going to be with you. You will never forget him no
matter what. You should think of this as the last present A.J. was able to
give to you".

Man that just made me upset. I started to get teary eyed all over this. I
started to cry slightly. There was dead silence.

After a minute Peter comes back with "are you alright? I know its hard but
you will make it. You need to stop worrying about things so much".

I told him "I guess so, but its just now everytime I see that money or
something that I have purchased with it I will think of him. I am not sure
I can handle that. It has really been hard these last couple weeks".

Peter goes " The thing is, everytime you look around you can see things
that will remind you of him. Its not the money, its him. This is just like
another way to remember him".

We chated about a few things and then they asked me how much money was I
getting.  I thought for a minute and then said "you know what, I do not
even know. I was so wrapped up in not wanting it that I didn't even think
of asking. Oh well I guess I will find out soon enough".

 After they were assured that I would be alright we said out goodbyes.

I sat there for awhile thinking about all they had said. It did make sense,
but then with them two it always did make sense. They knew what to do. They
knew how to get me to see things in the light. I just wish they were closer
where I could see them more often. I mean it was only an hour and a half
away but that seemed like a long ways sometimes.

I decided I would call my boss and tell him I would start back on sunday
night. The work week started on a sunday so that was as good a time as
any. After handling that I went down to see A.J.'s boss.

When I got there we chatted about this and that. My heart just wasn't in
it. It seemed he could sence it and asked if all was well. I assured him it
was, it was just that things were different now. He seemed to understand
and started to talk about the issue at hand. He gets these papers out and
hands them to me. He goes on to explain what the insurance company had
said. I looked them over and signed where needed be. After signing them I
handed them back to him. He assured me he would handle it and the company
would get in touch with me. We shook hands and I then I left.

Well now I was in a bad mood. I felt like I was betraying A.J. somehow. Now
sure why I felt like that, but I just did. I decided I would go to the
beach again. If I could get to my special spot I could spent some time to
think this over. Peter and Scott said not to worry so much. Just take the
money and run. But, to me it just didn't seem right. It was like bad money
to me. It was money that was stained with his blood.

I got to the beach and it was buzzing. Where did all these damn people come
from. Then I remembered there was something going on in town. I had totally
forgotten about it. Oh well I will just climb in there and hope no one sees
me. I got under the walkway and slid to the back. Seemed to work. Don't see
anyone watching me. I just sat there and started to think. The more I
thought the more depressed I became. This was not going to work. Then I
thought, you know I could give this money to charity or something. Yea,
that would work. That way I could do something good with it. I could even
do it in his name and then I would feel better. Yep thats it, I will make
some calls tomorrow.

I looked out and relised it was getting dark. Damn I had been there all
day? There was still lots of people out and about. It was ok with me. I
started to watch. People were lying here and there. Children running
everywhere. Some with bathing suits on, some had shorts. Some of the guys
weren't bad looking either. Of course none of them could look better than
my A.J. I sat there and just watched. Little by little people started to
leave. The wind started to pick up a little off the gulf. Was there going
to be a storm tonight? I had not seen the weather. I sure hoped not. I
hated it when the weather was bad and I was at the beach. Of course I could
always go home but, I liked it here. It was better than home to
me. Especially now that no one was home for me.

Soon it was really starting to get dark. I looked around and there was only
a few people around. The wind was calmer, but still there. I decided I
needed a swim. I climbed out from under and walked to the waters edge. I
looked at the waves and then started to walk out. I walked until I was
about waste deep and then fell back. Wow, the water felt nice. I swam and
splashed and was really enjoying myself. Finally getting tired I walked
back to the beach. I didn't have a towel so I would just have to drip
dry. I sat by the waters edge and let the warm breeze dry me. This was the
life. Sitting here on the beach and not giving a damn about anything. I
really liked it here.

I had been sitting there for awhile when all of a sudden some guy comes
by. He walked up to me and starts talking to me. He tells me he seen me
earlier hiding under the walkway. Oh damn, just what I need. Someone to
know about my spot. Now I will never be alone in my special place. I looked
up at him and said hi, but that was all. I decided maybe if I gave him the
cold shoulder he would leave. After all I was not here to find someone. I
was here to be alone. I always come here to be alone, not to talk to
people. Well after a few seconds I guess he got the message because he
started to get up and move on.

He goes "look I didn't mean to upset you or invade your life. I am sorry,
please forgive me".

With that he started walking off. I sat there for a few seconds before
relising what he had said. Wait, that wasn't like me. I would never hurt
anyone. Well yea I would, but not him. He hadn't done me anything. I got up
and started looking for him. He was way down the beach by then. I ran along
the beach and finally caught up with him. I grabbed his arm and turned him
around. He looks at me and pulls his arm away, and starts walking off.

I tell him " Look I am sorry about back there. Its just I have been having
a really bad time lately. I know I shouldn't have ignored you like that and
I am sorry".

He stops and says not to worry about it. He should not have been bothering
me. He just thought I looked lonely and wanted to talk to someone. With
that he walked off again leaving me standing there.

Well that really did it. Wow, a total stranger can see me and tell things
are wrong. I must be pathetic.

I tried to talk to him. I yelled at him to stop and come back. But, he
never did. He didn't even look back. I just stood there watching him walk
down the beach away from me.

Well I was no longer feeling good about myself. Here I had taken a total
stranger and made him feel bad. And for what, because he wanted to talk. I
couldn't believe it. What had I become. I started to walk back to my
spot. I just shook my head. I could not believe what I had just
done. Looking back I relised that he wasn't that bad looking either. Oh
well, like that mattered now.

I finally got to my spot and sat down. I relised how lonely I had become
again. Why did life have to be like this? First you get something good and
then you loose it. Why did things have to go like that? The longer I sat
there the worse I felt. Man, I had to get away from here. This was my
place, my home away from home. But, I not only had it invaded, but I made
someone else mad at me here. It would no longer be my special spot. Someone
else knew about it now. And to top it all off I had made myself feel really
bad about myself and my life again. This was really getting depressing.  I
wanted to get up, but somehow just couldn't. I sat there and tears started
coming to my eyes again. Before I knew it I was sobbing uncontrolably. I
don't know how long I sat there and cried.

I noticed the wind had picked up again. It wasn't hard but there was a good
breeze. I felt a little chill. I couldn't decide if I wanted to leave or
not. I crawled back under and all the way to the back. It wasn't as windy
there. I would just stay a few more minutes and then leave. I didn't want
to go home like this. Before I knew it I was asleep.

Later I was startled when someone had called my name. I thought I was
dreaming and didn't pay any attention to it. Then it did it again. What was
going on? I crawled out and looked around. I couldn't see anyone. I stood
there and just looked up and down the beach in a total daze. Who had called
me? There just was no one anywhere. Damn, I thought, I am really going
insane. I went to turn back around and crawl back under when something
caught my eye. I turned around again real fast.

What the?????????? I looked out towards the water. Man I AM going nuts. The
way the water is moving and the full moon shines makes it look like
something is out there. Wait, its not something, its a picture. No wait,
its a face. NO! It can't be. But there it is. I swear it is a face of
A.J. looking at me. He is smilling too. Now this is to weird. I close my
eyes for a minute. When I reopen them I swear the picture is still
there. It looks just like him. He has this smile on his face and he is
looking at me. I don't know what to do. I am shaking on the inside.

Finally I say something. "Is this a joke? What is going on"?

There is nothing, but the wind, slightly blowing. I hear nothing else.

I go "I know this can't be, but is that you A.J."?

Wow I swear the smile got bigger. I am going out of my mind. How will I
ever explain this to someone. To bad no one is here to see this but
me. But, it can't be happening. There is no way. It is the water playing
tricks on me. I have been out of it so long that I am starting to go nuts.

I turn and start to walk back to go home. This is to weird for me. I can't
handle this.

All of a sudden this big wind comes up and shoots down my neck. What the
heck was that, I thought? I turn back around and the face is no longer
smiling in fact it looks to be frowning. Now I am loosing it. First I see a
face. Then it smiles and now it frowns. I could explain this if I was
drinking, but I don't drink. I walk to the waters edge. Maybe if I get a
different angle on this it will go away. When I get there the face is still
there. I shake my head and wipe my eyes. I must be really high on
something, but I don't do that either.

All at once something wipes past my ear calling my name. I freeze in
place. I look at the face and it is smiling again.

I go "is that you A.J."? knowing full well that it not only can't be, but
it can't talk. I just stand there and then I hear a faint "yes". My mouth
opens and I stand there in total shock. I start to tremble all over. What
is going on?

I watch the face and the smile widens. I am starting to get teary eyed. How
can this be?

Finally after a while I go " A.J. I miss you so much. I wish you were here
with me now".

The wind picks up like its an answer, but I hear nothing.

I sit down on the sand and keep looking out at the face. It is still
smiling at me. I try to think of all the good times we had together. Before
I know it I am crying again. I cried for awhile and then the wind pushed at
my back. I wipe the tears and look back at the water. Now the face is
distorted, but its still there. I wipe my eyes again and then things get
alittle clearer. That face is still there, looking at me, smiling all the
time. I figure what the heck, I have nothing to loose. I will talk to
it. If someone comes by, they will just think I am out of my mind and haul
me away.

I start by saying how much I miss him and wish he was still there with
me. I tell him that I will never replace him with anyone. With that stated
the wind hits my back again. I look and the face is frowning again. What is
this? He can answer me? Now I think I am really out my mind. Oh well, try
again. I say, but A.J. I can never replace you with anyone cause you will
always be the love of my life. I might find another guy, but he can't take
you place. He would only be a replacement, an imposter. I look out and the
face is smiling again. Well I must have gotten that one right I think. Lets
try another one.

A.J., did you see that guy that come by tonight? Was he good looking?
Should I have taken the time to talk to him? I look out and he is
smiling. But, I go, you know he will never come by again. I ran him off. I
was a total idiot and ran him off. But, I am not sure I am looking for
anyone right now. Maybe one day, but not right now. I look again and the
face turns serious. You know it will take some time to get over you. I am
not sure I want to loose that feeling of holding you. You were everything
to me. With that the wind picks up again, but its a warm breeze. I thought
it was chilly. Where did that warm breeze come from?

Then I say, "you know I am going to give that money away from you
policy". Wow, wrong answer. That wind hit my back so hard. I look and the
face is really frowning now. Damn, it even looks mad.

 I say "but A.J. I don't really need it and I can put it to good use giving
it to someone else".  The face turns serious again. Its not smiling but its
not frowning either.

 Finally I say, "How about this I will keep half and give half away". I
look up and the face is smiling again. Ok that is what will happen then.

 I didn't know what else to say. I sit there for a while just looking out
at the water. I am so glad to be this close to him again if in fact this is
what you can call it. Finally I relise I am starting to get sleepy. But, I
don't want to leave. I wish for all the good times to came back. I wish he
could really be here again with me. Then the breeze hits my back again. I
look up at the face and it seems to be vanishing.

I say, "Goodbye A.J., my love, I will miss you forever".

Then the strongest breeze yet hits me right in the face. It almost knocks
me over. I relise that this is goodbye. He will always be apart of my life,
but now from afar.

I stand up and look out over the water and watch it disappear. Soon there
is nothing. No sign that I just had a conversation with my long lost
love. I felt really repressed but also happy to have gotten to talk to
him. This will change my life forever, just like he would have. I gather
myself together and head for the car to go back home. I know I just had an
expierence that very few people will ever get to have. I know I will have
to call Scott and Peter and tell them about this. I am sure they will not
believe me, but it doesn't matter. I know somehow that something happened
here tonight and it will be on my mind the rest of my life. It will not
matter who believes me or not, I know it happend. What hapened I am not
sure of, but I know something did.

 When I get home and get settled I make that call. I have to tell someone
what happened. I know its late at night, but they will not care. They
always said to call anytime that something important came up. This might
have been the most imnportant thing so far and I had to tell them. I dial
the number and hear it ring.

Scott goes "hello"?

I tell him hello and to wake Peter and put the phone on speaker. Do I have
something to tell you guys!.

The End !!!!

________________________________________________________________________

Well thats it. I sure hope you liked it. Its 3:30 in the morning here and I
am just finishing it. I have tears in my eyes just from thinking about
it. I know thats silly, but thats me. I wanted to end this story on a
positive note and I hope I done that. Let me know what you think. As far as
A.J. is concerned, I have been to the beach many times since and nothing
like that has ever happened again. The guy I seen that night, well I never
seen him again. Not sure what happened to him. I did get the money and did
exactly what I said I was going to do. I sent half to the people in New
York to help them with there lives. I hope it helped. As for me, I am still
hanging in there. I still have found no one, but I am still looking.
Everytime I see a good looking guy at the beach I wish that might be the
one. So far nothing. But, I have not given up hope. I will find someone
some day. I still get depressed, but I am learning how to control it. It
gets where I can tell it to go away now better and it usually does. If I
get to depressed I go to the beach and to my special spot and watch the
waves and call his name. Who knows maybe one day he will answer. In the
mean time I will carry on with my life. I hope you all have a nice life
too. I hope everyone finds what they are looking for. I know its a struggle
but it will be worth it one day.

For now I will be leaving for good for most of you. You might not ever hear
from me again. I will now just fade into the woodwork. I do plan to write
more stories tho so who knows. In fact I have two in my head right now. The
next one in fact will be the total opposite of this one. Some of you will
go "OMG" hehe. Watch for it on nifty and if you want to email me when its
done I will let you know where it is.

As for the rest of you. Just remember life is worth it and if you ever want
to just talk to some one thats been there then email me. I will answer all
emails I get except ones from assholes. I know life is hard and maybe
together we can make it work. If you ever need a friend to talk to then
call me. I might not be able to help, but I will always try. Thanks for
taking the time to read this.

jhw AKA Jimmy Allen/2002