Date: Fri, 12 Jun 1998 09:31:35 EDT
From: Wilson583@aol.com
Subject: "The Candidate"
THE CANDIDATE
by joe wilson
He paused for a long moment, a dramatic exclamation
point underlining the climax of his powerful speech....."And
if you elect me to represent your district in congress, I vow
now, that I will close down the porn shops, those dens of
iniquity that display in their windows for all to see, the
filth they sell inside. I will close the homosexual
gathering places, the evil Bars where they drink and meet and
solicit their insidious encounters. Yea, I will close the
baths and parks where they practice lascivious and sinful
ways," and he straightened his back and looked into the
eyes of his audience with his own eyes that burned with the
flames of conviction, I hate homos," he said, pausing for
emphasis after each word. "Vote for me and you will join the
war against queers." He bowed his head. His speech was over.
The applause and shouting mingled, and rose to an uproar
of approval. The several hundred, who had paid a thousand
dollars each to attend the banquet at the Newport Hotel
jumped to their feet with acclamation and approval.
The nominee, Todd Jenkins, left the podium to mingle
with his supporters. This was the moment he liked best, when
they shook his hand and patted his back, congratulating him
on his stand, agreeing with his narrow hatreds with their
clucking tongues.
He was a young man, just barely old enough to run for
office, with no experience in politics except for having been
student body president for two years at USC. Even then he
was a notorious queer-basher, having been arrested several
times for picketing the places of ill-repute with the energy
of youth and the dedication of a zealot. He was a strong
man. Powerful shoulders had been developed by spending many
hours at the gym lifting weights, the muscles in his legs
were solid from walking a Nordic Track. He was handsome
too. The chisled lines in his face, straight and angular,
were formed in regulated proportions that gave him the look
of a man modelling Guess Jeans or Jockey underwear.
The power in the local conservative party in Orange
County were pleased with their selection. He made a great
candidate. He would be elected, they agreed.
In the front row, watching the performance was an
equally handsome young man. His name was Danny Tobin. An
attorney filling in as a reporter for the Advocate, the gay
newspaper that represented the homosexual community. There
was fear in his heart, for he realized the power of the
candidates' speech, and the enthusiastic acceptance of it.
He stood back against the wall, away from the crowd of well-
wishers and back-slappers, the wealthy of the community who
could affod the high price of admission. 'Yes,' he thought
to himself, 'Todd Jenkins was a tough opponent, that's for
sure,' and then the juices began to flow in his loins, 'But
I'd sure like to tangle legs with him,' and he chuckled at the
impossibility of it.
Finally the crowd disappeared, and as the candidate
gathered his notes from the podium, Tobin stepped forward.
"Mr Jenkins, have you a few moments for the press?"
Todd Jenkins looked up from his papers. His eyes locked
to those of the reporter. Publicity was always welcome.
"Why yes, of course."
"Your speech was well-received, sir, a tribute to you."
"Thank you. I thought it went well."
"Yes sir, it did. Do you truly mean to close the adult
book stores, gay bars and parks? Do you really mean to
close the parks, too?"
"If the goddam queers gather there I'm going to close
them. Yes sir, that's my platform. Like I said, I hate
queers."
"Can I quote you on that, sir?"
"I want you to. I hate queers," and he paused and took
a sip of water from the glass on the podium, "What paper are
you with?" he asked with a smile. The two men, who were
almost twins in age and stature faced each other. 'God, he
is beautiful,' flashed through Dannys' mind.
"The Advocate," he answered with pride. His macho stance,
with his feet spread apart, his back and head erect, seemed
to be challenging the candidate.
"Shit! Another fucking queer!" Todd said and turned and
walked away.
Danny waited a moment so that the candidate could leave
the room. He was intimated by his arrogance and insulting
hatred, and of his own inability to stand up for what he
believed in; the acceptance of gays in a hostile society.
A sense of inadequacy depressed him. He wished he had spoken
out and defended his paper, himself, and the life-style he
loved.
It was raining. A light drizzle swirled in gusty patches
over the dim street lights. It was the kind of rain that
would last all night, quiet as cats' feet.
Todd Jenkins stood at the curb looking at his late-model
T-bird. His hands on his hips, his head back, "Sonova
bitch," he cried.
Danny walked up to him.
"You know who did that, don't you?"
"I can sure as hell guess. Shit that's what's making it
all so difficult. No wonder we're hated."
"That's not the only reaswon you're hated, Buddy. You
goddam queers always got to make some kind of a statement."
"Well shit man! As I recall you made some pretty lousy
statements yourself tonight. All those things you said about
the gays. Shit, you don't care a hill of beans about the
porn shops and parks. You're just on the band wagon using it
to get elected," he paused a moment feeling the drizzle
penetrate his jacket, and looked at the flat tires, "Shit man,
I'm sorry. But you asked for it you know. Look, my car's
across the street. Come with me, I'll drive you anywhere you
want to go."
Jenkins looked up. A smile flashed over his face. "That's
very nice of you after what I said about you and all." He put
out his arm. "I'm Todd Jenkins," he said.
"Danny Tobin."
They shook hands with the warmth and friendly greeting
of new acquaintances. Their grip was firm and strong and
Danny felt a rush of adrenalin as their hands touched.
'God I want this man so much,' he thought to himself.
'Just because a guy works for a gay newspaper doesn't
mean he's queer does it?' Todd Jenkins asked himself.
They drove in silence, each pondering his own thoughts.
Danny ever conscious of the animal attraction of the macho
male sitting next to him.
"What you said tonight is partly true," he said. I know.
Some gays make a bad image to the straight world and the gay
community resents it as much as you do. They're an embarrass-
ment, sure, but you got heteros who are an embarrassment too.
Just because we see a couple of straights fucking on the
beach, we don't say all straights do that, but you think all
homos do their cocksucking in the park rest-rooms, just
because a couple of guys get caught there."
"I see your point, but what about that St Christopher Day
parade, down Santa Monica Boulevard last month? Guys
half naked, arms around each other, kissing and groping?
Shit! You name it. I've watched them do it all. It's as
though they're intentionally trying to shock the straights.."
"Don't you see, that's exactly what they are trying to
do. They're making a statement, an announcement that his is
the way we are, and no matter how you feel about it, it's us.
Sure we're queer. We admit it. We're not hiding it like we
used to. Had to, really. We want out, out into the world,
accepted for what we are. Human beings. Just like everyone
else. We eat and shit and sleep and work and feel just like
everyone else. The only difference is our men are attracted
to men and our women to women. That's all. But why should
you hate us for that? It's just the way it is."
Danny stopped talking, letting the words finish his
declaration in a quiet pause sounded only be the windshield
wipers punctuating the silence. And then in a low voice,
like a penitent in a confessional, "I don't know anyone who
is queer by choice, who wants to be queer. It happens, and
you live your life as best you can."
Todd Jenkins mulled over the heavy sermon. Little darts
of self-doubt zinged into hidden corners of his brain,
touching sensitive targets that had too long been buried
there. For once his glib mind failed him. All he could see
was the disgusting antics of those queer misfits prancing
down the street on their naked toes, huge sausages attached
to the fly of their tight pants, swaying back and forth with
each tinkerbell step. 'Shit!' he thought.
Dan turned to him. "Listen, it's early yet. How about
you and I having a drink someplace, maybe a scotch or two.,"
he was eager now, his animated smile was open and friendly,
an appealing gesture from an attractive adversary.
"Sure. I'll have a drink with you," Todd said, his enthusiasm
expanding, his mind and words stimulated to debate.
The bar Danny selected was sedate with an atmosphere of
quiet luxury, surrounded by muted colors and soft music.
They chose a booth away from the many groups that huddled
close to the bar itself. Neither said a word until after
they received their cocktails. Todd lifted his in a salute
to his new friend, "Cheers," he said, a bashful smile flashed
across his face.
"A Votre aimant." Danny answered with a smile.
Todd looked out over the room. The patrons were men.
Singles, doubles and in groups, dressed in business suits,
shirts and ties. They laughed frequently to themselves as
they spoke to each other. There was dignity here. It was
as though they were in a private mens' club catering to the
affluent.
"So this is a gay bar," he said sipping his Tanqueray
martini.
"Yes, these men are gay. Like you said, 'Queer misfits,
sinful and lascivious.' That man in the tan suit, over by
the palm is on the board of several Fortune 500 corporations.
The man he's talking to is chief of staff at St Francis
Hospital. These men are bankers, lawyers, doctors, you name
it. They're all cocksuckers. Shit! They pay taxes just
like you and me. Ah! What the hell. I'm not going to
lecture you anymore. Sit back and relax and let's enjoy our
martini and stop criticizing."
He looked at Todds' hands. Long graceful fingers wound
around the glass. He felt a familiar stirring. Ah! How
hopeless it was.
The gin seemed to relax Todd, and they ordered another
sipping it slowly, their eyes made direct contact. How blue
they were, Danny thought. The lashes that topped them were
thick and blond.
"How long have you been a reporter with The Advocate?"
"Well, actually I'm an attorney on the staff. The magazine's
operated on a shoestring you know. We really don't have
much of a budget, so I fill in once in a while. When
something comes up like your fund-raiser and there's no
reporter around, I cover it. I'm glad I did tonight. I like
meeting you." He looked directly into the steel blue eyes of
his adversary. They were soft and liquid now, casting off a
warm glow.
"I feel that way too." He paused gathering his fragmented
thoughts into a sentence. "Working for the Advocate, does
that mean you're gay? I mean if I ask something out of line
and you don't want to answer, don't, but it's hard for me
to figure you for gay."
"Shit yes, man, I'm a cocksucker. Suck ass-holes and
armpits, too," he paused and in a low, but distinct voice
said, "I'd like to make love to your cock, Todd," and he
searched the blue eyes for resentment. Finding none he
continued, "Just you and me, alone at my place. I've got
some videos I'd sure as hell like to show you. Vanilla stuff.
Might change your mind about us," he paused and took a sip,
half expecting this gorgeous creature to get up and walk out
leaving him alone, but then he added, in a whispered voice,
"How can you knock it when you haven't tried it?"
Their eyes still locked together penetrated hidden
things yet untold.
"Ah!" he said pensively, "You have tried it."
Todd nodded, then taking his eyes from the pools of
wisdom, looked about the room as though searching for
something, not at all concealing his discomfort. The insight
of the man sitting opposite him was upsetting, digging up
secrets that had been buried for a long, long time.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Todd shook his head, "No," and immediately contradicted
himself by signalling to the waiter to bring another round,
to prolong their time together.
They fell into a comfortable silence that is reserved
only to friends. Danny reached across the table and gently
brushed his hand over Todds' hand. His fingers stroked the
inside of his wrist. The music sang its song of love and
men shifted from one group to another in the exercise of
seeking a partner to take home with them. Danny pulled his
hand away and, picking up his glass, he toasted his new
friend.
"Here's to us," he said.
Todd smiled and nodded, but did not return the toast.
His glass remained on the table untouched.
The silence that hung over them was becoming, in a way,
uncomfortable. Perhaps it's time to give up and go home. An
end to an unsuccessful evening. But Todd took a deep breath
and settled back against the cushions of the banquette. He
closed his eyes, but not so tightly that he could not watch
Danny through the veil of golden lashes. "My brothers' gay.
Not just gay. Queer, a pervert," he said, "He was older than
me, must have been nineteen, maybe twenty or so. He was my
hero. I idolized him. There was no one in the world so
great as my brother. I wanted to be just like him. His name
was Willie. We slept together all summer." He settled
back. His eyes were closed. Danny knew he was reliving a
dream so he said nothing. He sipped his gin to moisten his
dry throat. Lust was building within. Exciting visions
flashed in his mind.
"Well we did it. He sucked my cock, and I sucked his.
We fucked too. Did it all, I guess. Yeah, I'm a cocksucker
A shit-ass, fucking cocksucker just like you, you and
that judge over there, and that pretty TV hero. Shit!
I loved him. I'd do anything for him. Guess I did,
and then he betrayed me. After all his promises, all
that we did together. The love I gave him meant nothing to
him." Todd had tears in his eyes. "Someone we both knew
figured us out, and when Willie walked out on me, he tried to
take over, you know, move in, but I'd had it with queers by
then. Shit! I hate queers."
Danny caught his eyes again and locked them to his, "Do
you hate me, Todd? Do you really hate me?"
"I don't know," he said with a resigned sigh, "and I'm
not sure I want to find out."
He arose from the table, and turning his back on Danny, he
walked out of the bar and into the rain. He could not say
good-by to this handsome man who attracted him so. He didn't
dare even to risk a glance at him.
There was a taxi waiting at the curb. He got in quickly,
and with regret, gave the driver the address of his condo.
Todd sat back in the seat as the taxi sped away. He struck
his hand against his forehead with an anguished slap.
"Jesus Christ!" he exclaimed to himself. His thoughts
were teeming with self-recrimination. "What in the fuck was
the matter with me tonight? Shit! I haven't thought of
Willie for years."
Dear Willie. Sweet Willie. How easily he had taught him to
accept what he was. What he was supposed to be. Brought him
out into the gay world. Helped him live his life as he
wanted, or as it should be lived. The promiscuous Willie
found someone else, and then someone else again and again
leaving a string of broken hearts. Todd closed his mind to
sex. He sublimated it all into a pool of hatred. Being
celibate wasn't bad. It left energy to grow in other ways.
Wasn't he going to be the youngest congressman in the state?
But the excitement of that possibility was gone. He thought
of Danny. How handsome and appealing he was. He was so frank
and honest about being homosexual. He spoke of it with
candor. Even pride. And as he thought of him sitting across
the table with fire in his eyes, Todd knew Danny wanted him,
even before he had said, "I want to make love to your cock,
Todd."
Jesus, he actually said that. A rush of blood flooded into
his loins as he remembered it. Yet Todd killed all
possibilities of their friendship growing into something
lasting and important. Snuffed it, by running away.
He was twenty six. The last ten years had been lived in a
desert, caught in the quicksand of self-imposed restriction.
It was time he accepted himself for what he was. Ah Danny,
how he wished he had not left him. He was the key that could
re-open his life. He saw the smiling face with the dark
eyes burning like coals, looking into his secrets with a
knowing smile. How handsome he was. He remembered the long
graceful touch of his hand. What would it feel like
to have those fingers touching elsewhere?
He was fully hard now. His cock begged him to let it
out, out into the open world. Ah Danny, he thought, I wonder
what you look like without your clothes. Is your naked body
as beautiful as your face and fingers. Todd smiled, for he
knew it was.
He could hear the ring of the telephone before he unlocked
the door. He ran to it and picked up the receiver.
"I just wanted to say goodnight," Danny said.
Excitement rushed into Todds' loins at the sound of the
voice of his new friend. "Look," he said, "I'm sorry,
really sorry. I know I acted like a shit tonight. But
you shook me up Danny. Turned everything upside down.
I had it all worked out you know. All of a sudden, I'm
not sure."
"It's okay Todd, don't worry about it."
"You must think I'm crazy, or something. Shit!"
"Let it go, Todd. It's not like were not going to see
each other again is it? Look, how about you and me having
lunch tomorrow? The Grill at the Biltmore. Say one o'clock?
I'll be in the Mens' Bar." And before Todd could answer he
hung up?
Todd looked around the empty apartment. For the first
time a siege of loneliness and confusion overwhelmed him. I
could be at Dannys' right now he thought. Without realizing
it, he undressed, placing his clothes carefully on hangers in
his closet. When he was naked, his hands touched his body.
His cock was hard, flushed with the hot blood of lust. He
had been celibate too long. He walked outside onto the
balcony that fronted his bedroom. The rains were falling in
a gentle pattern, warm and tropical. They surrounded his
body like a heavy blanket. He knew he was visible to people
in the condo across the courtyard that separated them, but he
didn't care. In fact he felt a surge of pleasure at the
possibiity. He knew he was handsome. Exhibiting his body
became fun. Ah! That's what I have missed in my life, fun.
He touched his cock again. The luscious sense of touch. His
feet stood apart in shallow puddles of rain water. He began
to masturbate. He knew he was watched. He felt the stares
of unknowns, saw the glow and smelled the sweetness of
marijane from the patio across the way.
"Look at me," he cried silently, and sensuous thrills
shivered his body, thrilling his spine. He thought of the
hours he had just spent with Danny, of the lunch tomorrow.
The macho masculine Danny. The angular contours of his face,
the jutting jaw shaded with the shadow of his sprouting
beard. His lips were full and half open. Kissable. He
sould love this man he knew. I don't hate queers do I? He
reached to his cock. It was so erect it hurt, pushing out
into the night, filled with the blood of passion. He began
the slow and gentle stroke. He knew he had to release it,
to shoot to exhaustion if ever he was to sleep, but he
was startled out of his fantasy by the sudden and sharp sound
of the telephone. It rang, then rang again.
'It's Jon and Cris,' he thought, 'They must have seen me on
the balcony,' and he chuckled at the thought.
"Hello."
"I just wanted to say goodnight," Danny said in a quiet
voice. Excitement surged in Todds' loins.....
"Can I come up?"
"Where are you?"
"Downstairs....in the lobby. I couldn't sleep."
Before Todd could answer, Danny hung up. A thrilling
warmth flooded over him like a giant blush. He's here. He's
coming up. Ah, my God! Ah Jesus! He's here. He ran to the
front door and pulled it open. In his excitement he forgot he
was naked. He waited for the elevator to open, but Danny,
caught in his own whirlpool of passion was too impatient to
wait for it to descend to the lobby. Todd lived on the third
floor. Danny ran up the stairs, taking two steps at a time.
'He sounded surprised when I told him I was downstairs in
the lobby,' he said to himself, 'But he sounded excited, too.
Like as though he wanted to see me.'
He felt his body expand with the rush of anticipation.
So much more than he expected. He pushed the door leading
into the third floor lobby. The light from the small fixture
hanging from the center of the ceiling was subdued, casting
shadows in the corners of the room. And then he saw him
standing there, in an open doorway. My God! He was naked!
Oh my God! How tense was the moment of this meeting. Danny
could not believe that his beloved friend was there waiting
for him, naked. Naked! Oh my God!
He stopped his sudden motion, standing but several feet
away. Could this be real? Or was it merely a dream, a
fantasy?
The dim light gave a seductive etheral quality to the
vision of his beloved. How beautiful he was. How
strong and powerful, his body with broad shoulders and
slender hips. The calve muscles bulged with strength and
power, but narrowed to trim ankles. He scanned the golden
body hair that sprinkled across his chest, light around the
nipples, but thick in the deep sternum. A thin line of it
slid down his flat and quivering stomach, past the navel
to the treasure of his cock, that solid piece of hard muscle
that jutted out from his pubic bush. Oh my God! His
cock! Oh Jesus God! Danny lost himself to the unexpected,
and lust consumed him.
Todd. Todd, the celibate, the almost-virgin. His body
thrilled at Dannys' intense stare, Both men were momentarily
stunned into inaction as they each tried to cope with
reality. It was the offering of the prey to the hunter.
Danny was the first to recover, the first to move out of
the tableaux of this meeting. In a frenzy, he tore at his
clothes, tossing them in all directions, revealing his own
body, offering it to his new love. How perfect it was. So
strong with muscle, lightly furred, slender and sinewy, mach-
masculine. 'No nelly queen here,' thought Todd as his throat
dried with hunger and fire.
They each fell forward into brawny arms that encircled
hot flesh. Their lips met. Wet and open in a deep prolonged
kiss of heat. Their cocks rubbed, one against the other
pushed back into their bristly pubic hair. The forgotten
pleasure, swooped over Todd in an ever increasing crescendo.
'Aaaaaaaah my God!' he thought, as his tongue, wild and
uncontrolled, explored Dannys' mouth, tasting him. His hands
wrapped around Dannys' buttocks, pulling them together so that
their cocks could dance their own dance.
Todd pulled Danny inside his apartment and closed the
door. Somehow they stumbled into the bedroom and onto the
bed where Danny lay on his back. Todd looked at him, seeing
all the hidden secrets of his body, and bending forward, he
licked the salty pocket of the armpits, the neck, the nipples,
the button, then down to the toes, the graceful arch.
Slowly, his tongue made saliva trails up the inside of Dannys'
hairy legs. Oh God! it's time now. Jesus Christ!
Danny lay motionless. Only an infrequent sigh, a whimper or
moan expressed his pleasure. And Todd kissed the hairy
testicles, the wrinkled velvet skin that covered his balls.
He was intoxicated by the smell, the many odors of passion.
Dannys' huge cock swayed back and forth. Todd touched it
with his hand to steady it. Ah! The aliveness of that solid
member. The tip was exposed, for the foreskin had rolled
back over the ridge, and he licked it tentatively with
his tongue. It had been a long time since he had looked at
another man's cock, and he was entranced by the sight of it,
and in a burst of lust, he took the cock into his mouth.
Loving it. Sucking it. Bobbing up and down. There was a
wonderful sense of pleasure and completeness. Yes, he had
forgotten that, the exquisite pleasure that comes when one
connects with an erect cock.
Danny was crying now. He thrust his hips forward and back,
fucking his hard cock in and out of Todds' mouth, and Todd
sucked and wrapped his tongue around the smooth slick tip
of it. The ecstatic pleasure grew and swelled like a giant
ninth wave, until Danny could hold back no longer. The
sweetness of the erupting semen suddenly came back to Todd,
overwhelming him as the spurts of hot cum struck the back of
his throat. And the realization that this was Danny, this
was Dannys' sperm he was swallowing caused his ejaculation.
Ah! The two-fold pleasure was exquisite. Better than he
remembered it to be. And he ground his throbbing cock into
the mattress and sucked on Danny until at last the pleasure
turned to pain, and they separated, and folding their bodies
together, they lay in the wonderful afterglow of communion.
No words were spoken. There was no need for them now.
Tongues had other things to do. They expressed their love
with kisses and licking secret parts. Danny was overwhelmed
by the passion of his homophobe foe, the candidate, who had
spoken the cruel words of hate. It was as though a dam had
burst its side and spilled its contents in all directions.
Could love happen so fast, he wondered?
Early in the evening, his moments of desire were only
that, the need of another cock, tangling legs with a new
body, but suddenly a spark ignited the pleasures, seeking
and giving. The spark of love, the fire of real and honest
passion. And Todd, in his naivity, gave of himself to his
liberator. Freed at last from the restricting band of
unrequited love, from the disappointments of the past, he
revelled in the enormous surge of pleasure that washed
through his body. His life now would take a sudden turn
to the left, bathed once more in the hypnotic freedom of
choice that he had for so long a time denied to himself.
And as they sucked and fucked the night away they sealed
their commitment, their intense caring and love with the
mortar of body fluids that were never to wash away.
Joe wilson
I hope you liked my story
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wilson583@aol.com