Date: Sat, 1 Sep 2001 13:02:19 -0700 (PDT)
From: Pigs Fly <sensual_dude2000@yahoo.com>
Subject: To Love Again...Part 10-Beginnings Section of Nifty Archive

This is an original story and all similarities in
names, places, etc, alive or otherwise, are pure
coincidences.

Ted's Point Of View:
	"JEREMY! PLEASE! PULL OVER! I BEG YOU!" I shouted as
loud as I could out of the window in the car while my
right hand was steering the wheel. It was dangerous,
but life did not matter anymore, not without Jeremy.
	"SHUT UP! I DON'T WANNA LISTEN TO YOU! JUST LEAVE ME
ALONE!" He shouted back at me. I could see the tears
on his face, and my heart ached at the thought that I
had caused him so much pain, but he misunderstood the
scene; if only Jeremy would listen to my explanation.
	Our cars were running faster than ever, and we were
shouting back and forth, with me trying to get Jeremy
to pull over and him answering me in negatives. I was
worried sick about him cause his eyesight was blurred
by the tears in his eyes. We arrived at the red light
and I stopped my car, only to realize too late that
Jeremy had rushed ahead. A bus from the right side of
the road could not stop in time and the collision
could not be avoided. Jeremy's car was sent hurling
onto the left lane and screeched all the way onto a
tree.
	"NO!!! Jeremy...," I, as did many other drivers,
alighted from my car and rushed forward to Jeremy.
	"Please, God! Don't let him die; I can't live without
him, no...," I muttered softly under my breath when I
reached Jeremy, all the while trying to get him out of
the car, which was overturned and badly damaged.
Fortunately, the window to his seat was not
underneath, so it was easier to pull him out.
	For the next minutes, all I knew was a blur. I was
crying, not bothering about the people around me. I
heard someone calling the ambulance and the police
with his cellphone, and some people were trying to
help me got Jeremy out. I was shaking with fear when I
finally managed to. He was bleeding all over his body
and it was driving me insane. I realized too late that
I should not have dragged him out that way for fear of
any broken bones, but I lost all sanity and thinking
processes at the thought of my soulmate dying inside
the car. I just couldn't bear the thought of it. He
could not die on me, no way.
	Soon, the ambulance and the police arrived. After all
the formalities, the ambulance took him away; I
followed in my car after the police asked me some
questions. I kept thinking of what to do if he died.
My heart was aching so badly that I just could not
think straight.
	Arriving at the hospital, I rushed inside and sought
out a nurse.
	"Hey, I am Ted and I need to ask about the patient
who had just been wheeled in. He had an accident and I
need to know where he is." I did not care to talk
more. All I could think of was Jeremy dying in the
hospital somewhere.
	"I'm sorry, but you can't see him. He is in the
operating theater right now and the condition is
critical. Are you a family member? I need your
signature."
	"I am his roommate. Can I sign that form?"
	"I'm sorry, but we have to have a family member. Can
you contact them?"
	"Okay, I will." I rushed towards the payphone nearby
and dialed up his parents. They were shocked and told
me that they would be here very soon.
	After informing them, I rushed to the waiting place
outside the operating theater. My heart was beating so
fast and it was all my fault. I should have been the
one inside, not Jeremy. I was the cause of it all; why
Jeremy? If Jeremy didn't make it, what good would life
be?
	I waited on and on for hours. Jeremy's parents
arrived by then, signed the necessary papers, and
Jeremy had yet to come out from the operating room. It
was maddening, and it was killing me. Then suddenly,
the door opened and Jeremy was wheeled into the ICU.
	"Doctor, I am Jeremy's father. How is my son?"
	"Well, the condition is not too bright at the moment.
He does not have the stamina someone his physique and
age should have. His hands and legs are bruised and
some parts are bleeding, but no broken bones
thankfully. However, his head must have been hit
hardly during the collision and it was bleeding. I am
worried that he may not pull through. I am sorry, I
have done my best. All we can do is wait because now
it all depends on him and his will to live through
this."
	The doctor walked away and the three of us ran
towards the ICU. However, only one of us would be
allowed into the room each tim to see Jeremy and it
was only for five minutes. Jeremy's dad went in first,
then his mum and I was last. His dad was looking grim
and miserable while his mum was crying all the time.
Finally, it was my turn and I went in to see my man.
	Jeremy's head, legs and hands were all bandaged and
it hurt so much to even look at him, knowing that I
was the cause of all he has to go through right now. I
made my way to the side of the bed and sat down in the
chair.
	"J, I'm sorry. I don't want you to die, you hear me?
I can't live without you. There are so many things I
want to explain to you. I never cheat on you, really.
You have to live and give me a chance to explain. J,
please. I'm begging you. Wa...wake up, please," I
cried softly and it hurt so much that I just couldn't
say anything else. I just held Jeremy's hand in mine
until it was time to leave.
	2 days went by, but it felt like forever. Jeremy was
still in a coma and there was no sign of waking up. I
never left the hospital since the day of the accident,
not even to work. I had called up my workplace, and
Jeremy's, to inform them of the accident.
	"Ted, we know how much you love Jeremy, but you have
not eaten anything at all for two days. Water will not
be able to sustain your strength and it is not
healthy."
	"Thanks, Mrs. McKnight, but I am not hungry. I just
want to be here when Jeremy needs me. I know he will
wake up. We have planned to be together forever and
not even death can spoil that plan for us. If anything
happens to him, I don't wanna live either."
	Just then, Mr. McKnight walked in with some
sandwiches and he offered me on, but I refused, saying
that I did not have an appetite.
	"Well, sonny. Do you want to see Jeremy when he wakes
up?"
	"Sure I do, sir. I love him so much and it hurts more
than words can say," I said, trying to hold back the
tears that had threatened to flow down.
	"Good, but you have to eat something. You don't wanna
die on him, do you? No food means no strength and you
may faint anytime. Jeremy is worrying enough and you
know we love you just as much. How will we feel if you
drop down unconscious some time later?"
	I realized the wisdom of his words and I thanked him
for the sandwich, struggling to gulp down the food.
Everything seemed tasteless to me. I could not
concentrate on anything but Jeremy. We were still
taking turns to look at Jeremy and I had been in and
out from the room countless times, but it never felt
enough. I wanna be there with him for days, but it
just wasn't possible.
	That evening, I was in Jeremy's room talking to him
about our first meeting, the first time we kissed, the
first time we made love and I told him how much I love
him. Suddenly, the monitor was beeping and I was
surprised. The doctor rushed in and I was told to
leave for a while.
	The three of us sat outside, impatiently. J's mum was
crying, his dad was pacing back and forth and I kept
twisting my fingers while sitting down beside J's mum.
It was pure agony to be waiting like this while
anything at all might happen to Jeremy.
	After what seemed like eternity, the doctor came out
and he told us that Jeremy's condition had stabilized
and if everything was fine, Jeremy would be put in a
normal hospital room. However, there was no sign of
him waking up yet. It was hard to predict; it might be
hours, minutes, days, months, years......
	We heaved a sigh of relief at the knowledge that
Jeremy was no longer in danger, but the heaviness of
our hearts was still there because no one knew when
Jeremy would be waking up, or even if he would at all.
	I was surprised when I saw Jeff entering the waiting
room. I wanted to kill him there and then, but I held
back the anger and pulled him out from the room before
he could say anything at all.
	"What do you want? How do you know we are here?"
	"I am sorry to hear about him, Ted. I called your
workplace and they told me you are here and about the
accident."
	"Well, what do you want? Are you happy that you have
caused all this misery? I love that man, Jeff, and if
something happens to him, I won't forgive you. He has
not woken up from his coma for 2 days."
	"I just wanna apologize and I am truly sorry. I will
not bother you anymore, but I just need to apologize
to Jeremy too. Will you call me up when he wakes up?"
	"Well...fine, I don't know why I am forgiving you,
but fine. I'll give you a call when he wakes up." I
took down his phone number and he left.
	Jeremy did not have a relapse that evening and he was
allowed to be put in a normal hospital room. There
were another patient in the room, an old lady who, as
we learned by talking to her, had fallen down in the
bathroom and she was sent to the hospital immediately.
	"Hey, Ted. We are going down to the cafeteria to eat.
Do you wanna come along? Jeremy will be okay in here."
	"No, thanks, sir. I wanna be here when he wakes up. I
will just have a sandwich, please, if you don't mind."
They nodded and left the room. The old lady was
sleeping soundly and I took the opportunity to hold
Jeremy's hand. The bandages had been taken off and I
was glad to see the bruises healing well.
	"J, wake up, please. I need a chance to explain." I
was muttering softly for a few minutes when I could
suddenly feel his hand moving. It was a tiny movement
yet I knew it was there.
	"J, J, WAKE UP. Hey, J!"
	Jeremy's eyes fluttered open, but he closed them
again after a few seconds. I called for the doctor
with the alarm by the bed and he arrived a few minutes
later. After I told him what had happened, he began to
do some checking up on Jeremy, the eyes and stuff like
that.
	"Well, I think he is fine. It is common for patients
who have just woken up from a coma to behave that way.
They will be fully awake the next time round." I
thanked the doctor and rushed to the cafeteria to tell
J's parents about the news. I ate my sandwich as
quickly as I could and ran back because I wanted to be
with Jeremy when he woke up the next time round.
	When I arrived there, Jeremy was awake and he was
talking to the old lady. I rushed to his bedside,
feeling relieved and happy.
	"J, I am so glad that you are awake." However, his
eyes were cold and he ignored me.
	"Get out of here. I don't wanna see you, or talk to
you. We are through."
	"J, please. Listen to me, I...."
	"SHUT UP! I DON'T WANNA SEE YOU, OKAY?"
	"I'm sorry, J. I...I will....I will see you later."
	"Don't bother," he said as I  walked out of the room.
Jeremy's point of view:
	"He is your boyfriend, eh?"
	I was surprised when my hospital roommate asked me
suddenly.
	"Well, ex-boyfriend. He cheated on me and I don't
wanna see him or talk to him anymore."
	"Hmm, I won't know that he is your boyfriend, only
God knows."
	"Then, why did you ask me if he is my boyfriend or
not?" I was surprised and asked her out of curiosity.
	"Didn't you see his eyes? His love for you is written
all over them. If I were you, I would be elated to
have someone loving me as deeply as he loves you. You
are gonna regret it, sonny. He loves you more than
life itself because I had seen the way he looked at
you when you were in a coma this morning."
	I thought about what she had just told me, but mum
and dad came in at that point of time. I was surprised
to see them here, but I should have known cause Ted
would call them for sure. Mum filled me in on what had
happened the past three days.
	"You are so lucky, J. Ted were with you all the time.
He even starved himself for two days before your dad
finally managed to persuade him to eat something, if
only just to live and be with you. He loves you so
much, J. Oh, yeah! Where is he?"
	I was ashamed of what I had done, but nevertheless, I
told them the long and short of the matter. I could
sense mum's disapproval of the mean way I had treated
Ted, but she made no sound and I was grateful. Now, if
only I could find Ted! I could not move about because
I was still linked up with some cords and stuff.
Ted's Point Of View:
	I sat down in a quiet corner in the hospital and no
one was there. I thought about Jeremy and my heart
ached when I remembered the way he looked at me. It
was so painful and I cried softly. The tears were
making the sleeves of my shirt wet, but all I could
think of was Jeremy.
	I remembered the first time I saw him. I was in his
kitchen, looking for a glass of water and he had just
woken up, looking so adorable. Then, there was that
look on his face at the mall before Christmas. He was
so surprised at my sudden tapping on his shoulder that
he jumped and everything went flying in all
directions.
	That was not all. I could still remember the first
time I ever kissed him on his lips. It was so
beautiful and it hurt to know that it was all over
now. Jeremy would never forgive me and it hurt.
	I could still feel his touch, his caress and the
expression on his face the first time we made love. It
was so beautiful, so tender and most importantly, he
looked so happy. His smile and laughter were no longer
mine and I would never make him frown or laugh
anymore. He could not forgive me for all I had done
and I was hurting miserably.
	I could not hear his voice when he greeted me in the
morning, the tender kiss and the teasing. I would not
be able to feel him next to me, embracing me, and it
was killing me slowly, painfully.
	All those only told me one thing: he was out of my
life forever and I couldn't bear the thought. I took
out a small bottle of pills and in a moment of
insanity, wanted to gulp them down. I had bought the
pills at the pharmacy in the hospital and I wanted to
end my life. There was no me and no life without
Jeremy.
	I was preparing to swallow the pills when suddenly
they were all scattered all over the floor. I looked
up and saw Jeremy, his eyes filled with tears.
	"What do you think you are doing, you idiot? You
don't love me anymore, you don't want me anymore, do
you?" Jeremy shouted at me, with the tears in his
eyes.
	"J, I am not hallucinating, am I? Are you really
here?"
	Jeremy bent down next to me and took me in his arms.
We sobbed, soaking each other with tears of pain and
sorrow. After a while, J looked up at me, gazing into
my eyes with a serious expression on his face.
	"Do you love me, Ted?"
	"I do, J. I do, more than life itself."
	"Then, why do you want to kill yourself?"
	"I...I couldn't bear the thought of living without
you. You...you said we are through, are we, J? Tell
me, please," I looked at him pleadingly.
	"No, we are not, but I want to hear your explanation,
okay?"
	"I will, J. C'mon. Sit beside me and I will explain
them to you." I put my hand over his shoulder and
began to tell him what had actually happened. I even
told him that Jeff had come to apologize and he wanted
to say sorry to Jeremy too.
	"Will you forgive him, J?"
	"Yeah...I guess I will." We sat down in a comfortable
silence. No words was spoken cause we knew that
everything was all right and life would be beautiful
because we have each other and nothing else mattered.
Our heads were resting one on top of the other.
	"J, will you do me the biggest favor in my life?"
	"What's that?"
	"Ever since we are together, my soul, my heart are
complete and I know that I want to be with you
forever. Will you marry me and be mine? Not even
eternity can separate us and the love we share.
Please..."
	"I...I do, I will, Ted. I love you so much."
	We kissed and it was a salty kiss as the tears of
happiness were mingled in it, but we didn't care about
it. We knew that the future ahead would be filled with
trials and pain, but as long as we were together, life
would always be beautiful and we were gonna be just
fine.

                 ~~The End ~~
A word from the author:
	This is where the author, meaning me, will be
thanking everyone who has been with me from the
beginning of the chapter. Thank you for the e-mails
and words of encouragement. I hope you love this
chapter and I want to take this opportunity to let
everyone know that I have a new story coming up. It is
called "Miracle of A Dying Star" and I hope you will
read the story too. Thank you so much and "Good Bye."