Date: Tue, 24 Jun 2003 15:47:06 -0700 (PDT)
From: Flippp <geatravel@yahoo.com>
Subject: True Companions - Part VI  P Day Afternoon II

This is the continuation of a fictionalized account of my mission in
France and Belgium in the early 1970s. Though based upon real situations
and circumstances, it is still fiction and only is what I would have
liked to have happened.

Gary

---------------------------

Part VI - P Day Afternoon II

Everyone was dressed for fun. No suits or ties or dresses for the
sisters. It was to be a day for play in the Cultural Hall of the chapel
and eating. Everyone had brought different things to eat. We
brought ham and cheese sandwiches along with our fruit. Verviers brought
some cooked beans that were supposed to be like chile but who could tell.
The Zaps brought the drinks - Orangina. Elders Caldwell
and Anderson brought cookies. They were apparently bought because, as
Elder Caldwell told it, the oven in their apartment burnt his special
homemade cookies. Yeah, right. Elders Anderson and LeSueuer provided a
variety of cheeses. But all of us were hoping for something really good
from the sister missionaries. They didn't fail us. Sister Fuchs
made some incredible sauerkraut and potatoes in the Chapel kitchen. I
normally didn't like sauerkraut but this was incredibly delicious. Sister
Allen made a special bundt like cake in the chapel oven that
was full of chocolate and nuts and covered in powdered sugar. It was a
feast for a king or several kings!

We spent most of the afternoon eating and playing games. It was a good
release for all of us. The sisters brought some games from England and
Germany I had never heard of before so we learned those.
We played some dodge ball and drop the hanky. Elder Bertrand gave us his
French version of pin the tail on the donkey. We couldn't play basketball
- no hoops - practically un-American - oh, yeah, we're in Belgium. But
the Elders all challenged each other in a Fusball tournament. Americans
at that time didn't really have any ability to play Fusball. Too many
hand motions. It took some time to learn. But the Elders played it all
over the mission. It was THE mission game.

Finally, the day was coming to an end. We needed to clean up and start
out for home. I had a great time with all the elders and felt like I was
part of a good bunch of guys. Even the sisters were full of fun. But, I
kept close to Elder M. The two of us were always on the same team. We
rooted for each other and always tried to be on the same team. We dropped
the hanky on each other and crashed together after our run around the
circle. During dinner, we sat near each other and acted like an old
married couple with our comments. I liked being with Elder Millett. He
was becoming part of my life.

The Zaps took us back to the bus. We were tired. The bus was late coming
and we finally climbed up the steps to our room about 10pm.

"Oh flip!" moaned Elder M as soon as we got in the door. "We forgot to
pick up our laundry. Now we don't have anything clean to put on for
tomorrow. Crap!"

In reality, we really didn't have much at all. Everything was out being
washed or cleaned. Then I remembered we still had our dirty garments from
when we went to the bathhouse.

"Hey, we could wash out the garments from this morning and hang them up
to dry. At least we'll have clean Gs to put on in the morning," I said
while pulling out my garments from the morning.

"Great idea! I'll put on some water to heat and we can hang them up over
the heater."

We spent the next half hour grinding our dirty pair of garments into the
wash water, twisting them and re-twisting them the try and squeeze out
the dirt and perspiration. We had dressed down to just our own garments
while standing there like old washer women. We also washed a pair of
socks each and a t shirt to put on in the morning.

"Elder," I said. "Six months ago it never occurred to me that I'd be
standing here in sweaty garments next to another guy while we washed out
garments and socks and shirts and hung them out to drive. Man,
life really changes on ya', doesn't it?"

Elder M laughed. "Yeah. We might as well be married for all we've done
today!"

Thinking back to the bathhouse then to the Zone outing and the looking at
us standing there washing clothes together in our underwear, I joked,
"So, when are you going to get out the lacey nightie for me?"

Elder M practically fell over he laughed so hard. "No, Elder, you're the
wife. You get to put on the nightie."

"Oh no, Elder, you do the cooking and the washing so that qualifies you
more than me!"

Then from behind me, I heard Elder M start to pretend he was the wife. In
his best falsetto voice he said, "Oh husband, dear. Time to get into
bed!"

I turned around and he was there with his garment down off his right
shoulder and doing an enticing little dance with a lot of hip swinging. I
cracked up. He was so flippin' funny. He curved his finger to make me
follow him while he sang some tune I'd never heard of before and
continued his little dance to the bed. Then he started to take down the
other shoulder of the garment and slip them down to
his navel. He continued to swivel his hips and do his best female
interpretation. I kept laughing but inside, I was getting turned on by
his naked chest and swinging hips.

Finally, he turned his back to me and let his garments slip over his ass
and then he bumped his ass back to me and said, "Let's get going big
boy!" He paused and then fell over on the bed and the two of us just
laughed. I jumped on top of him and said "You wish!" while I slapped his
ass and then the two of us just fell over on the bed next to each other
and laughed. After a couple of minutes, we stopped
laughing but neither moved. My hand was on Elder M's bared chest and I
was next to him lying on my stomach. Both our heads were on his pillow.
In this position, we talked about the day and how much fun we had at the
Zone meeting. We talked about our investigators and our hopes for a
baptism in a week or two. I got up on one elbow and rested my head on my
hand. We talked a lot about our missions and why
we were there. We expressed our testimonies to each other. The atmosphere
changed from tomfoolery to a spiritual meeting of our spirits. We were as
one. It wasn't in the least bit sexual. It was loving in the same way as
Jonathon and David. It was, perhaps, the most meaningful moment in my
life. For the first time, I was connected to another human in a way I had
never experienced.

We talked for a couple of hours while lying there on the bed half naked
and a little wet from the washing. Elder M talked about his family and
his brothers. He had 5 brothers, all older, all served
missions. He loved them a lot. He talked about his great parents and
their support for his school activities and their love for him. He
expressed how much love he felt for them and from them. He thought that
Heaven would and should be like that, people loving each other in deep
and meaningful ways. He thought that was how we should approach our
investigators. Love was in his heart.

I talked about my dysfunctional parents and alcoholism and how I never
allowed myself to be close to anyone in my entire life. Dependent
children of alcoholics always expect the worst to happen because they can
never trust their parents to respond in normal ways. That was certainly
what my childhood was like. I never knew whether I
would be slapped or kissed when I walked in the door from school. I told
him I envied his family and especially the love he grew up with. I began
to cry a bit as I expressed how much I wanted to raise a
family like the one he grew up in.

At the end of our conversation, Elder M looked me in the eye and said,
"Elder, no matter what happened to you in your family, that's all in the
past. Today is today and I want you to know that I am your brother in
every sense of that word and you are my brother just as surely as the
five I have at home. We are a family, here in Seraing, Belgium. The love
we have will be the best thing we can give away to those whom we have
been called to serve."

We looked each other directly in the eyes for what seemed like an
eternity but after a few seconds, with teary eyes, I mumbled, "I'm not
sure I know how to give away that kind of love. I've, um, never
felt like..." My voice trailed off as I was trying somehow to express the
unexpressable, to describe the deep hole I felt inside. The sense of the
overwhelming emptiness I felt inside, the years of painful loneliness,
the constant searching for purpose, the ache I felt every day of my life
-- all these unexpressed and deeply covered feelings
began to come to the surface causing my eyes to overflow. I tried to keep
it in. I didn't want to show such weakness to the man who just allowed me
into his circle of family and love. But I could no longer contain the
love-less tears that escaped from inside nor the soul-less moans that
rang low and lost from deep in my throat. I had come to a moment of
catharthis and fire needed to take its toll.

Elder M somehow understood. He put his arm around me and gathered me
close to him and in a voice beyond his years said, "It's okay, Elder. Let
it all out. Don't keep anything back. I'm here for you now."

I remained there in his arms and cried. He didn't move. After some time
passed, I gathered whatever cohesiveness I could and tried to talk.
Without lifting my head and in between sobs, I said, "I'm sorry to dump
this on you. I don't know what's happening to me. I never cry. I never,
ever say anything about what I'm feeling. I can't even
tell you what it is that I'm feeling. I'm just ... I don't know ...." My
voice dibbled off as I tried to understand what I was experiencing
inside.

"You're feeling the Spirit make you a new man, Elder. You will never be
the same person again for you will know that you are loved as a brother
and as a son. You need never feel unloved again."

With that, he hugged me tighter and kissed my cheek. The richness of the
spirit continued with us for some time. Eventually, the two of us stood
up, straightened out our clothing then, feeling the need to express
ourselves in a deeper way, we knelt in prayer together. We prayed words I
cannot write here. We prayed with a feeling I'd never
experienced before. This moment shall ever be the time I remember
learning who I was and, understanding that, this moment was the time
I first felt beloved.