Date: Sun, 4 Dec 2005 03:07:42 +0000 (GMT)
From: Lidyah Khan <lidyah17@yahoo.co.uk>
Subject: the-ugly-duckling chapter one

Summary: Jordan begins a different day than usual.

Ratings: PG 13- NC 17

Disclaimer: The story, the characters all belong to me. Archiving or
plagiarising my stories are prohibited without permission.

Legal: If you are not of age to read this please leave. However I hold no
responsibility if you do choose to read this story. Please do at your own
risk.

Links: I post at www.slashfanfiction.com and www.nifty.org under the name
Lidyah. My live journal http://www/livejournal.com/community/orton_fics is
a locked community. You must have a live journal to access my community.
Lidyah is by no means my real name, this is a mere alias. Other than these
three places, and at odd times at www.fictionpress.com I only post my
stories there. I have also started a yahoo groups for those who follow
updates with them: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/lidyah17/

Email: lidyah17@yahoo.co.uk or orton_qaf@hotmail.com. Feedback is lovely
whether good or bad. Have something intelligent to say if you feel that my
writing isn't all that good, giving me tips and pointers will help.

*

I lay on my small office couch for about five minutes. I usually pitied
myself a lot longer at home, but I had work to attend to. Heaving myself
off the couch, which was a difficult task on it's on, I moved towards my
desk and plopped into my chair. I moved my mouse a little and my screen
re-appeared after being on stand by.

I looked closely at my programme the numbers and letters looking more of a
virus, than a code to help make a better computer. I wasn't looking at the
code to understand what I had wrote, I was just dazed and looking past the
screen, other than at the screen.

A loud buzzing sound jolted me out of my daze. I reached over and pressed
the small grey button,

"Yes?"

"Junior Johnson has scheduled an appointment with you."

"For when?"

"Later tonight. He said he was quite busy and wouldn't have time to fit you
in during the week."

Fit me in. Man that made me feel so much better, this was business
something I was good at and he couldn't find time to fit in his best
programmer, that fucking piece of s----.

"Mr. Smith?"

"What time did he say Helen?" I was irritated now, and I felt like punching
someone.

"Geez. Don't get all snappy with me, it's not like you have a social life."

Helen was a young twenty year old, blonde hair, blue eyes and the look of
eternal elegance. For a beautiful young woman, she was a crass,
foul-mouthed, rude bitch. Who didn't know the first thing about using a
computer. The only reason she was hired was that she flirted her way
through her interview with old Johnson. Cliche I know but it happens. Every
office has it's flirt.

"Helen get on with it," I prodded her along. Usually she would forget what
she had been told five seconds earlier.

"He said eleven sharp."

"AT NIGHT!", I yelled. My God I may not have a life but that didn't mean he
had to take the utter piss.

"Geez. Do you mind not blowing my ear drums," whined Helen on the other
end.

"This is ridiculous," I cursed loudly.

"Well whatever. You are scheduled in for an appointment then. So be there
or be fired. His words not mine," and with that she hung up, I let go of
the button, and sat heavily back into my seat. Why does this shit always
happen to me. I come in early because I like too, but I hate leaving really
late that just makes me look pathetic. Now I knew I wasn't going to be able
to work. I now officially hated my new boss.

*

-Knock, knock, knock-

"Come in," I yelled, while tapping away furiously on my keyboard. I willed
myself to get something done, and I knew that sitting around not doing
anything would agitate me more.

"Anything from the trolley dear?"

Chianna was an elderly black women, slim and tall her hair was always
pulled back in a tight bun. She told me she refused to stop working until
her legs could no longer carry her. Her job was simple, push a cart full
off assorted sandwiches. She always graced me with a smile and a small kiss
on the cheek.

I walked over to her, she leaned over and as usual kissed me on the cheek,
"How is my boy doing?"

Chianna is the mother I never had, she took me under her wing when I
started in the business when I was twenty-one, six years later and our bond
was stronger than ever.

"Just tired, I can't seem to work today," I said wearily. She gave me a
small nod, closed my office door, picked up my favourite chicken sandwich,
led me to the couch sat me down and handed me the food. I took it
graciously and unwrapped the heavenly goodness.  She handed me some orange
juice and sat next to me, patting me on the knee.

"Tell momma what's the matter."

After knowing her for two years, and knowing about my relationship with my
mother, Chianna told me that she saw me as one of her sons, and that if I
thought of her as my mother then I should call her `momma'. So I did, and I
never felt any remorse or guilt with the idea that maybe Chianna was
replacing my `other' mother. Now when I said I stuck out like a sore thumb
in my family portraits I wasn't kidding. My mother disliked me. I say
dislike because she said to me that she didn't hate me, just that she
didn't `understand' me. I was never a looker then nor now. My mother went
out of her way to leave me home alone when I was a kid. She would take my
brothers to parties, and parks, and everywhere that resulted in being
outside.

I remember when I was ten, and my mother had some of her `swat' friends
over for some brunch. Her "closest' friend (If you can get one in between
these backstabbers), said that I was one ugly kid. I remember the
conversation like it happened just a few days ago.

-flashback-

"Claris the lunch is absolutely wonderful", said Joanne to my mother. Both
were seated in the outside gazebo, eating smoked salmon and drinking red
wine.

"I'm glad you liked it, I had the fish imported in from Scotland," replied
my mother.

"Exquisite. So where are those two strapping boys of yours. I tell you
Claris those two are going to be heart breakers."

My mother laughed smoothly, "They are out with their father. He wanted to
take them out fishing."

"What about the other one?"

"Whom," asked my mother like she forgot she had another son.

"Jordan? That is his name right," giggled Joanne.

"Oh. Probably up in his room reading or what not."

"Claris darling please don't take this the wrong way...but you know
compared to Adam and Chris he is well...ugly..."

My mother laughed loudly," I know why do you think I never allow him to
come outside all that much. I don't know what genes he got."

Both my mother and Joanne continued to laugh, as I ran back upstairs and
into my bedroom sobbing into my pillow.

-end flashback-

I had told Chianna about that, and many more hurtful memories between what
my mother said about me, and what was said between us. She was out-raged
and saddened by the lack of love I got from her. My father was just as bad,
he excluded me from any `father-son' time, and only gave that pleasure to
my older brothers. As years passed and as I grew into a teenager, I threw
myself into schoolwork. Unlike my brothers I wasn't going to be achieving
any scholarships through sports, so I used my mind.

My father was and still is a rich man. Owning a multi-million dollar
fashion business, he had enough money to put all of his three sons through
college, a million times over. Yet he refused because he was a greedy
man. My brothers got their scholarships through football, and I got mine
through my academics. Both Adam and Chris got a party, while I was again
left out in the cold.

My brothers however were great to me, they were the only ones who
celebrated my birthday, and bought me presents. The ones that through me a
small party when I got my scholarship or passed my exams. The ones that
attended my graduation from university. They were there when I got my own
house, and my first job. They loved me through and through and were more
like parents to me than my own. My parents tried to make them distance
themselves from me, it worked when they were younger, but as they got older
they hated our parents for treating me the way they did and still do.

Adam and Chris both still live in Chicago, and I see them once a month and
we call each other every two days, and email everyday. Adam being the
oldest at thirty-four wanted to make sure we didn't all loose touch when I
moved. Adam at first didn't want me to move to Los Angeles, but Chris made
him realise that I was a young man and had to draw my own path, and they
couldn't coddle me forever.

Chris who was only a year younger than Adam, he was much more laid
back. Other than myself and Chianna he is the only one that knows about me
being gay and a virgin. Not that I don't trust Adam, he's so much of an
alpha male, that his sex stories intimidate me, and I felt he would laugh
at me about my `situation.' I guess I shouldn't assume that from him, but
telling him is slightly daunting. I promised Chris a few months back that I
would tell Adam about me being gay. I own them both the least to be
truthful.

Without my brothers I would have been truly lost. However when I left
Chicago at twenty-one I felt lonely and scared. Chianna is a mother of
five, all which are boys and all whom are only one or two years apart. All
the handsome, well muscled, beautiful black men. They also took me under
their wing, never once looking at me as an outsider. It's true what they
say, sometimes strangers seem like your own.

Jonathan, Peter, Mackey, Thomas and little Albert helped me through some of
my worst time. I had been a cutter, a few years back sometimes life got too
much for me. Peter and Mackey had come over to my place, each of them had a
key and when I didn't open they let themselves in. I didn't hear them when
they opened the door to my bathroom and saw me slowly slicing at my
arm. Everything after that was a blur, and I remember waking up a few days
later and seeing the hurt and pain in their eyes, and vowed never to go
back there.

Over the years we have become a tight family, when Adam and Chris come they
come with me to see the boys and Chianna. I have the love of seven brothers
and a mother, yet I still felt incomplete.

"Tell me baby," she cooed at me making me smile at her.

"New boss. He's `demanded' to see me at eleven at night," I replied
lying. Yes I was agitated and frustrated at him but it wasn't that. I knew
that Chianna was buying it. Why did I bother again?

"I'm sure you'll be fine with seeing him then, you must understand his
point too, and sweetie please don't lie to me. What is the matter?"

I sigh loudly and shrug, "He's gorgeous and he's everything I can't have,"
God sometimes I wish I could shoot myself for sounding like a little brat.

"Says who?"

"You have to be supportive," I replied sarcastically.

"No I don't baby. You can be everything that he is, you can be that man who
looks like he walked out a magazine shoot, but unlike some you don't put
much thought in appearance because at the end of the day, it's the heart
and soul what matters."

I smile at her lovingly and wonder why she didn't give birth to me?

"You will find your love my son, and he'll love you for YOU, and not the
way you dress, eat, walk or talk. He'll love you for your love, trust and
friendship. And I'll be damned if I let you sit there and pity yourself
because you don't think your good enough," she finished sternly.

I laughed lightly, "Got it momma."

"That my boy," she replied patting my knee, "I have rounds to make. Coming
to dinner Aiye?"

"Of course."

"See you then baby."

I wave her out watching her push her trolley, she was the only one who
could get me out of a stump. Feeling better and rejuvenated, I made my way
over to my computer and began working again, and this time I wasn't dazing
out.

*

Time had rolled along and I was so engrossed in my work, that I didn't hear
Helen enter my room.

"Geez. Are you deaf?"

"Can you say `geez' anymore than you do," I snapped back not bothering to
look at her.

"Funny. It's nine, I'm headed off remember you have to see stud in two
hours. Don't make me lose this job," with a swish of her blonde hair she
left my room, leaving a trail of sweet perfume lingering after her. I
continued to work hard, I was close to finishing my programme and I was
full of adrenaline.

*

I leaned back against my chair, and smiled excitedly. I had finished the
code I had been working on for the last four months. It was probably one of
my best works. I glanced at my watch, and then did a quick re-take it was
ten past eleven. Holy crap, I stumbled out my door and all but ran to the
new bosses office. Heaving slightly I knocked on the door, and heard him
shout out to come in.

I opened the door and saw him standing by the window. No longer dressed in
his black suit. He was decked out in blue jeans, and a white t-shirt. If it
was possible he looked more beautiful dressed casually. He moved his hand
initiating me to sit down. I did so quickly and folded my hand on top of my
lap. Fidgeting only slightly. He sat down placing the papers he held on the
smooth table top.

"Tardiness is something I do not tolerate," his voice was smooth but firm.

"I'm so sorry sir. I was working out the new graphics code for plan213 and
I didn't realise the time."

"In any case you must be able to attend schedules on time Mr. Smith," he
was so professional that it made the whole situation sort of funny. Mostly
because he looked like a gorgeous dumb model.

"I understand."

"So do I. You seem to have a high standard here Mr. Smith and I see that
you spend most of your time working hard for this company. It is all
appreciated, and all your codes have been major successes. "

I nodded blushing slightly.

"My uncle may have not realised what he had here, but I do and I intend to
keep you close to me."

If it was possible my heart started beating that much faster.

"I'll be looking over the code of plan213 you have just finished, and I
must say a month before the deadline is very impressive."

"Thank you," I replied modestly.

"If that is an all go, we'll be both working on a new code. It's a hush,
hush matter and all under wraps and only the best and talented will be
allowed to work on this. Seeing as you are one of the best I hope you say
yes to my new proposition."

"As long as it's not illegal," I replied giving him a wry grin.

He smirked at me, `Indeed not Mr. Smith. But it will be beautiful."

"Well I can't wait to start then."

He smiled softly at me, "Leave the code at my desk first thing tomorrow
morning. Thank you for staying back, and welcome to the team."

He stuck out his hand which I took smoothly, "Thank you." I left his office
and all but leapt into the air. The day looked that much brighter.