Date: Tue, 10 Aug 1999 18:06:23 -0400 (EDT) From: EG <bsbwriter@altavista.net> Subject: Adam, Zach and BSB, Parts 13,14,and 15 (gay/boy bands/Adam Zach and BSB) Well hello readers. I've gotten more responses than ever since my last plea. Thanks, particularly to old standbys Matt, Yuli and TonnY and to new and fairly new responders Jim and Richard. A special thanks to DLS (author of great story Brian&Me) who has helped a lot with these parts. Question: how come everyone wants to hurt me just because I'm not giving away who Zach's with. Maybe he's not even with anyone, ever think of that. I'm happy my story evokes that much emotion-learn to be patient though, huh? Enough of that. These parts on the short side, but I think they're adequate. They're also very quiet and emotion based. Look for more action in the next sequence. As always, please drop me a note at bsbwriter@altavista.net Tell me what YOU think is the deal with Zach. Enjoy! EG Part 13 At first, I had an inkling of the sun jutting through my eye lashes, then as I opened my eyes fully, I saw it was morning. The eyelet curtains had been pulled back to reveal a sun rising in Provence. I watched as the light spread across the field of wild flowers. I smelled coffee-not the strong, acetic coffee of last night, but something more gentle. It was a little chilly, and I must have kicked back the covers during the night because I felt a tiny breeze on my back. I felt a fingertip trace gently down my spine just to my waist. I rolled over, and it was Kevin, silouhetted by the bright sun. He was dressed in a short terry-cloth white robe that defracted the light rays in all directions. He looked like an earth angel. "Morning, Adam," he said gently. "So tell me, are you still glad you came?" "Absolute-" I let out a big yawn and stretched. "Was that a yes?" I nodded. "Good-do you want some coffee?" I nodded again, still half asleep. Kevin bustled a little and then brought me a mug of coffee. I sipped it. It was mild, with something like cinnamon or nutmeg in it. Mmm. I cupped my hands around it, and wrapped the sheet around me like a makeshift toga. I went to gaze out the window. Kevin wrapped is arms around my waist and I tilted my head back onto his shoulder. I could stay like this for a long time. After a few moments, Kevin said, "Okay, time to have breakfast-put some clothes on-or not. I'm sure Nicola wouldn't mind." "Hmmm..." I paused jokingly, "No, after much deliberation, I think I'll get dressed." "Okay then. You can have the bathroom-I already showered." "Thanks," I said, and dragged a piece of luggage with toiletries and clothes into the bathroom, which was, let me say, huge. There was a large bath/hot tub like device. There was also a shower stall, which I chose in which to bathe, for this particular morning. The tub would be for a special occasion. I grabbed my body soap and hair stuff and started the shower, which was pretty cold. Thinking it'd warm up, I made myself bear it for awhile. After the first ten minutes, I admitted to myself that it was not getting any hotter. For the next five minutes, I tried to pretend the icy shower was a natural waterfall. Although it didn't quite work, I got myself to wash and got out as quickly as possible. I dried off and looked at the choices for apparel this morning. I needed something that looked really good, but didn't look like I was trying. I went for a new-ish navy-blue t-shirt and khakis. The final result was the perfect effect, I thought. I went to dry my hair with my dryer, but then remembered European sockets-no chance. My hair would have to dry by itself, which I knew would make it look rugged and out-doorsy, which perhaps was all right for the occasion. I put on a pair of gray and charcoal Pumas and left the bathroom. "Wow," Kevin stared. "You look really really good." "Thanks-but my hair's a little messed up because-" "Shh. Its looks fine-wonderful. You're perfect." "Thanks," I said surprised. I noticed what he was wearing-a beige t-shirt and jeans. Very thin silver hoops were in both of his ears-in the second hole on the left, he wore a small turquoise stud. He looked really really good too. The outfit was laid back-it made him seem like a real person. "You look nice too-nice, but different." "Yeah-you'd be amazed what a wardrobe artist will do to you. These are my normal clothes. This is like something I would have worn before we got famous." "I-I like it." "Good-because this is part of the real me." "I like the real you." "I like the real you, too." "What?" "I like who you are-I like the whole package." "Um..." I was taken aback by his frank honesty and kindness. "Sorry-I was too forward. Stupid Kevin." "Hey-don't beat yourself up too much. You'll ruin that pretty face." "Aww. Enough of this-I'm hungry-let's eat!" Kevin bounded down the staircase and I ran after him. He was like a little kid. His demeanor of stern father had vanished along with having to be responsible for the Backstreet Boys. I'm sorry to say, but I really could get used to this. At a large dining table, I saw a maid put the finishing touches on the breakfast spread. There were baguettes, cheese, fruit, instant hot chocolate, cold cereal, and oatmeal. There were also all the hot foods, sausages, bacon, eggs, very American things I didn't really expect to see. It was too bad I wasn't a breakfast person, but Kevin made up for it. He heaped his plate with all sorts of things-I, on the other hand, took an apple on a plate along with another cup of coffee. There was no one else around, so we sat at a small coffee table by a window. "Where's everybody else?" I asked. "Well," Kevin said with his mouth full, "Luc and Nicola are probably out doing errands in the village-and no one else in the Inn gets up this early." "By the way, what time is it?" Kevin looked at his watch. "About five-thirty." "Oh, is that all?" I joked. "Are you not a morning person?" "Not particularly." "I definitely am. We'll make a man of you yet, you pansy." "Fine, Paul Bunyan. I'd like to see you try." We laughed, but then fell silent and a little uncomfortable. We both wondered if that was a double entendre-and knew it was. Kevin finished his plateful, while I finished my apple and coffee and jumped up. "Where are we going?" I asked. "Horseback riding." "O--kay," I said, and followed him. He led me out back and to a stable I had previously overlooked. I was actually pretty experienced in riding-my folks used to summer is Colorado on some acreage we had there. We had a few horses. I used to go out for long rides, sometimes all by myself, sometimes with Zach. "I really love horseback riding-but the management won't let me put it down as something I'd like to do-they think its too wussy for my tough guy image," Kevin sighed. "Tough guy? Is that what they were going for?" I asked, playfully sarcastic. This time he caught on. "Yeah, yeah they were-what's it to you?" "False advertising," I said laughing. He looked ready to tackle me but instead he said, "Okay-pick your horse!" Kevin led me inside and to a row of Chestnuts and Palominos. I scanned the stables and stopped at a Chestnut with a white lighting bolt on his forehead. I pointed at him. "Nice choice-you have picked Arnolde-a three year old Chestnut with particularly beautiful markings and a penchant for speed and jumping-just kidding. I myself will take Quincy, the gray four year old Appaloosa. Now lets go, my boy," Kevin said in a British accent. He was known for accents-just take a look at any behind the scene BSB videos. Kevin told me to get on the horse which he had already put the saddle on. I realized it was English. This was not good. I was used to Western riding-which is more laid-back. I had no idea what the hell I was doing. "Kevin?" I asked. "Huh?" "I don't know what I'm doing." "I thought you knew how to ride." "Not English." "Its not that different, come on." "Okay-fine." The difference between English and Western is a matter of riding style-English is sort of uptight and you ride the horse hard, and in Western, you sort of lightly persuade the horse to move. I got on the horse, and Kevin got on his. I gently nudged my horse to follow Kevin's, but Arnolde stayed planted where he was. "Just do it a little harder." I did, apparently too hard-because the horse went running off with me still on it. In the center of the field, Arnolde bucked and I slid off onto the ground-luckily though, I wasn't hurt. Kevin got his horse to trot to where I was, while I watched Arnolde canter into the distance. Luc came running from the house. He was waving his arms and running towards me. "What are you doing? That horse, that horse needs to be broken in before it can be ridden," he said, in the same accent as Nicola. "What?" Kevin said, finally catching up. "But that's Arnolde-you've had him for two years." "That is no Arnolde, Arnolde was sold a month ago-that is Marlette-a thirteen month old wild pony which we purchased from the states. He will come back-he's not a stupid horse, he knows where he gets his food, but please be more careful next time." Kevin hung his head. "I'm sorry, Adam." He offered his hand to help me up. "Its all right, you didn't know," I accepted and got pulled up. Luc grumbled and headed back to the house. "Maybe we should just go for a walk, huh?" Kevin said. Kevin gave his horse to the groom who had appeared after all the commotion. "Fine with me." I kept holding the hand which he had held out to me. We made our way out of the house and across the field of wildflowers in silence. We began to enter a forest when Kevin looked straight into my eyes. "So, where are we, I mean, in the relationship?" I looked back. "I'm as clueless as you. I mean, we got the profession of love, or aspiration to love out of the way so-" "I think..." he trailed off. "I think I love you." I paused for a moment and concentrated on the canopy of trees that surrounded us. Then, finally, I said, "How can you be so sure already? I mean, I've sorta known you for years-through interviews, videos, concerts, I was always out there, watching. You never knew I was out there-you never knew I existed." "I know you're here now." "Look, Kevin-I have strong feelings for you-but we got off to such a rocky start I at least need to wait a little while before I say those words again-no matter how I feel." I reached over and put my hand on his shoulder. "I don't understand why not. Just say your feelings. Its easy." "Okay..." My mind was fogged with the thought of every love story since the beginning of man-fairy tales, movie epics, soap operas. Kevin leaned over for a hug, and I put my head on his shoulder. I loved the way my head fit perfectly in the sloping area in between his neck and shoulder. I looked up at him. He looked so sad, but it was different from the way I had seen him at the bar. It was this emptiness. I loved him, but was I ready to say it? I looked one more time at his tragic cobalt eyes. Hell yeah. I straightened up, until my face was across from his. I leaned in slowly, and closed my eyes as my lips met his. They were soft-and I know this sounds stupid, but the texture was exactly like rose petals. He moved in closer, and I sucked on his lower lip lightly. Then, we disengaged. It had been my first boy-kiss and it was sweet and wonderful and beautiful-and my heart was racing. I whispered very softly in his ear, "I love you." He nodded and kissed my neck. "Thank you." Part 14 We held hands on the way back to the house, and I sat on the stairs while Kevin went to get the keys to the Peugeot. He came running down and jumped over the door into the convertible. I followed and he drove off onto another dirt road. It at first looked that we were heading into nothing at all-but then I saw the skyline of a very small provincial town. I saw a few cafes, with outside tables, a butcher, a street clown, and some produce stands. Kevin parked the car and led me to one of the outside table cafes. We sat down at the round metal table. A short, middle aged waiter attended to us immediately. Kevin had some coffee and I had a water. I saw a girl of maybe 17 walking up to our table. Kevin had been wrong-the Backstreet Boys magic had reached even this little town. I groaned and so did Kevin when he saw her. She approached us. "Excusez-moi, monsieur, mais etez-vous..." Kevin shook his head. "I'm no one famous." The girl looked puzzled as said- "Non-" she pointed at me- "Etez-vous Brendan Fraiser?" Kevin started laughing. "Non, mademoiselle. Je suis desolee. Je m'apelle Adam." "Oh! Je m'excuse, s'il vous plait!" She looked embarrassed and ran back from the direction she came. That's weird. I'd never been mistaken for a celebrity before. And I really don't think I look like Brendan Fraiser at all. I told this to Kevin and he agreed, "But," he said, "you know movies come out much later here than they do in the states. Maybe she saw Encino Man-you do look a little like a Homo Sapien." He laughed even harder. "That's not what you said this morning!" I whipped back. "Fair enough, fair enough." "Truce?" I asked. "Truce. Now, seriously-we do need to talk." "About what?" "About us-if there is going to be an us, about Nick, about the group." "And about Zach." "What do you mean?" "Well, um, the other day, he told me he might be gay, or bi." "That's cool-but why does this matter to this conversation?" "Well, he told me he had a crush on someone he'd been around in New York. Now that has to be one of the group members. Which makes it your business." "Well not for now its not." "What do you mean?" "Well, for now, I'm suspended from the group." "What?" "When I took off, and didn't say anything, and they had to cancel the Independence Concert, I got suspended until September-which means no attending Backstreet Boys events or being in the press spotlight at all-fine by me." "So its not, now, but it will be come September-aren't at least just a little curious, if not worried, as I can already tell you are?" Kevin unfurrowed his brow and tried a fake smile. "Well, do you know who?" "No idea." "Well...its not me." "It better not be, for Zach's own good," I joked. "So that leaves the four guys." "Do you know if any of them, besides Nick, have other than straight thoughts?" "Not that they've mentioned to me." "Okay, well I could call Zach-I did tell him I would." "Then do it," Kevin shrugged. He stirred his coffee as I took out my cell. "That'll work from here?" he asked. "Yeah-its really expensive to upkeep, but it was my graduation present from my parents." "Cool-so call already! I'm getting anxious!" "Okay okay Mr. Patience." I dialed Zach's cell number. It rang four times before he picked up. "Hello-you've reached Zach's cell-talk to me!" "I wish you wouldn't answer like that, its terribly obnoxious," I yawned. "Adam! My man! How goes it with your Backstreet Boy?" "Fine-but why are you talking like that?" "Talking like what?" "Like you're high on something." "High on love, my friend." "Love?? When did this happen?" "Gentlemen don't kiss and tell!" "Zach-shut up and answer my questions-where are you and what are you doing and with whom?" "I'm in Boston-having fun-with the Boys." "The Boys?" "Yes, a group of international music gods-I think you know them-Nick, Brian, AJ, Howie..." "Yes, I happen to have the other one right here." I rolled my eyes. "You sly dog!" "Zach-what's gotten into you?" "Sorry, old boy, I have to go. A lunch date beckons." "A lunch date with who?" I asked, but he had already hung up. "Arghhh!" I said, exasperated. "What was that?" Kevin asked. "Zach being weird. He said he's in love, that he's in Boston with the rest of the group and nothing else of much substance. I've never heard him act like that." "Act like what?" "Some pretentious brat." "Ick. That is freaky." "Maybe you could call one of the boys and see what's up?" "Maybe later." Kevin was lost in deep thought. Part 15 We walked around town a little-but it wasn't any fun because Kevin was somewhere else mentally. "Do you want to go back to the inn?" I asked. Kevin only nodded absently and gave me the keys to the car. I drove back to Nicola and Luc's without too much trouble. Kevin was silent the whole way. When I parked, and got out of the car, I realized he was so out of it, he didn't know we had arrived. I felt daring, and walked over to the passenger side. I leaned over and whispered in his ear, "Earth to Kevin. Earth to Kevin." then kissed his earlobe directly above the turquoise stud. He snapped out of it like I knew he would, and a small smile spread across his face. I pulled him by the hand into the house. We walked into the house and Nicola was fussing around the parlor. "Allo! You are back. I wondered where you went-I heard about the happening with the so-called `Arnolde.' What are you doing? Getting your objet d'amour killed?" I started to say something, but instead we looked at each other and blushed. "No, Nicola," Kevin smiled. "I need to make a few calls. Adam-you can stay here or listen to my side of the phone calls." "I think I'll join you-I have to admit I'm curious." "Okay." "D'accord, you two, join us for dejeuner-and ma petite grenouille?" Nicola asked. "Yes?" Kevin turned and asked. "Remember to be careful." Kevin nodded and I followed him up the stairs. We got upstairs and I flopped on the bed. Kevin arranged himself on the chaise and picked up the phone from the table nearby. "I'll just call B-rok first," he said. "He's the one who's the most likely to tell me anything." I nodded and Kevin dialed the number to Brian cell phone. "Hey, cuz." [pause] "This is Kevin, dork." [pause] "Yeah, its been good. But tell me-" [pause] "No I don't think so-not until September." [pause] "What's wrong?" [pause] "Why can't you talk about it now?" [pause] "Fine." [pause] "Yeah, okay. Bye." Kevin hung up. "I don't understand it. He was acting so weird." "Why do you say that?" "Well, Brian's usually very direct-he says what he means, but he was avoiding every question I asked by asking me one. It was really frustrating." Kevin called Nick and AJ, but it was always the same confusing conversation. Then he called Howie.