Date: Sun, 29 Apr 2001 18:08:35 -0700 (PDT)
From: WIP MAN <worknprog@yahoo.com>
Subject: World Tour 6-10
Well folks, here's the next section. Just a few things here before we get
started. To all the readers that thought Matt, Brian, A.J. and Nick
should've finished the orgy they started, sorry guys. I know everyone
wanted to see some deep-dickin' action going on there, but remember, Brian
and Matt are supposed to be in love. Ofcourse, you never know what might
happen in the future. And as always, I know you all hate cliffhangers, so
I got this section done as soon as I could. I was able to get thru the
last section without any hateful e-mails, so I thought I may as well not
press my luck. As always, shout out to one of my favorite people in the
world--Matt. As always, this is all fiction, none of it true(as far as I
know), and I don't know the BSB. And, for my kick-ass fans, if you have
any questions, answers, comments, want to say you hated or loved the story,
e-mail me at worknprog@yahoo.com!
Bad Boy B-Rok:
The World Tour
(Part Six)
By-Lep
"Baby, I can come with you." Brian discreetly squeezed my thigh as
we sat side by side at the airport terminal.
"I know. But you can't leave the tour for me. Besides, I'll go see
Donna, and I'll be right back on the road with you guys. You know that."
I tried to give him my most positive smile.
"The guys are so upset you're leaving so early." Brian frowned.
"Awwwww. Tell the guys I love all of 'em, but this is my sister."
I squeezed his thigh back.
"I don't give a shit about the guys--I'm upset you're leaving."
Brian gave me a pathetic "I know you're right" smile.
"Boy, you're too cute for words sometimes." I grabbed his chin and
gave it a squeeze quickly enough to not be noticed.
"You promise to come back as soon as you can?" Brian looked down.
"You know I will." I pulled his chin up with one finger.
"Okay."
"Boy, don't start this or I'm gonna be crying the whole way home."
I gave a crackled laugh.
"Just--well just don't get hurt, k?" Brian squeezed my thigh so
tightly I gave a gasp.
"I promise, baby."
"Good, I don't want anything happening to you when I'm not there to
protect you." Brian smiled softly.
"I love you, baby." I smiled back.
"You know I love you, too." Brian stood up. "I'm gonna go catch my
flight to San Diego, okay?"
"Alright. Get out of here before we both start boo-hooing, k?" I
laughed slightly.
"Okay, love you bunches." Brian smiled and walked off.
I fought an urge to turn in my seat and holler for him to come back
and give me a kiss and hug. It was definitely hard, but I managed to stare
straight ahead and wait for them to give the announcement that my flight
was to start boarding. I was so tired that I was just waiting to get in my
seat before I passed out for the almost four hour flight. The night
before, I had to tell Brian right away that I was going to have to leave
the tour for a couple days or so. He didn't take it too well.
There wasn't any shouting, or fighting, but he was upset. I guess,
coming back to the hotel after a show was a lot nicer when you had someone
to lay down in bed with. Definitely made the tour less lonely. I almost
decided to call Donna back and tell her I couldn't make it, but Brian
talked me out of it. He knew I hadn't heard from her in five years. This
might be the last chance I get to see her for another five years.
Donna calling was almost ominous. Ever since my mother had kicked
her out of the house for, as I recall it, being a "whore", she had never
looked back. I would've done the same thing, except I loved my younger
sister Kylie too much to leave her behind. My parents were one thing, but
my sister was my buddy. I couldn't do to her what Donna did to me.
Besides, who would leave someone that nice in a house that even Marilyn
Manson was afraid to take a step into?
I didn't have too much time to contemplate the whole history of my
life. They began letting people board the plane. I quickly got in line,
pulled my hat further down over my eyes, and gave my ticket to the lady to
be looked at. She gave me a quick wink and a smile and I got on the plane,
quickly finding my seat in first class and stowed my bag overhead. No
sooner had I plopped down in my seat and put my seatbelt on, then I was
fast asleep.
I didn't wake up until I felt the plane jolt when we landed at La
Guardia. I slowly rolled my head until it was back up straight where it
belonged. I cringed as my neck muscles gave me a cussing. The nasal
voiced captain came on over the intercom and told us not to stand until the
plane had come to a full stop, welcome to New York, all that crap I'd heard
a couple hundred times before. I waited like a good little boy until the
plane was at the gate and had stopped completely before I quickly stood and
yanked my bag out of the overhead compartment. I was in a pissy mood for
some reason.
Probably because I had slept with my head on my shoulder for almost
four hours and Brian wasn't there when I woke up had done it. I would have
rather been on tour for the next four to six months with no sleep than be
in New York at my apartment with all the sleep in the world. Atleast while
I was on tour, I had Brian. Not that I wasn't thrilled to see Donna again,
but I didn't want to not see Brian for any length of time either.
I quickly made my way past the "buh-bye's" of the stewardesses and
walked as fast as I could to claim my luggage. I only got a few looks as I
made my way to the exit with my bags in tow. I was hoping no one would ask
for an autograph or make a scene. I just wasn't in the mood for it. I was
particularly happy when the first taxi I saw was vacant and waiting on a
fare. I didn't bother asking the cab driver to open the trunk. I just
shoved my three bags in the back seat, went around to the passenger side of
the back seat and got in, quickly lighting a cigarette.
I noticed the cab driver looking back at me in the rear view mirror
off an on as I gave directions. I had told him at the beginning the street
address, but he didn't seem to comprehend, so I just directed him as we
went. I had to admit, no matter how pissy a mood I was in, being out of
the spotlight for awhile made it alot easier to walk amongst the public.
Getting looks was alot easier than getting mobbed.
When we got to my apartment, the cab driver didn't even bother to
help me with the luggage, so he got the minimal tip. It took forever for
me to lug all my suitcases up the stairs. I had forgotten how long a walk
up the stairs it really was. I guess I could have taken the elevator, but
as often as it broke down, I'd rather have an asthma attack first. As much
as I--and all the other tenants--paid a month in rent, you'd have thought
the landlord could keep the elevator operational.
I opened my apartment door, and immediately the musty smell hit me.
Ofcourse, my apartment hadn't been dusted our aired out in over a year, so
that would explain why. I turned up my nose and walked in, dropping my
bags just inside the door. I looked around and noticed everything seemed
to be in order. Brian had told me that Aaron had broke into my apartment,
but it sure didn't seem like it. Ofcourse, all I could see from where I
was standing was the living room, dining room and kitchen. I could see the
answering machine flashing violently from where it was on the phone stand
by the couch.
I walked over quickly and hit the erase button. That little chore
bit the dust quick. I knew I had to unpack and make sure everything in the
apartment was taken care of, but I knew Donna would be tracking me down
again if I didn't call her first. I grabbed the cordless and flopped down
on the couch. I yanked my cigarettes out of my pocket as I dialed the
number for the Plaza. I exhaled heavily as the line was answered.
"Thank you for calling the Plaza Hotel. This is Christina, how may
I help you today." A voice that was way too cheerful stated.
"May I have Donna Thompson's room?" I kept it sweet and to the
point.
"She's in 1610, it'll be just a few moments." Christina said
sweetly, then I heard the muzak while she transfered me.
I took another long drag off of my cigarette as I waited for Donna
to answer. At first I thought she must be gone because it rang forever.
Finally, the muzak stopped.
"Hello?" I heard Donna's voice.
"Donna?"
"Matt? Is that you?" She sounded very cheerful.
"Yeah, it's me, Donna." I sighed as I blew out smoke.
"You here?" She asked quickly.
"I'm in New York, yeah. I just got home."
"Oh, thank goodness. I was afraid you wouldn't come. You didn't
sound too happy last time we talked." Donna spoke quickly, but kept a
positive tone.
"So, do I need to come see you or what?" I avoided the comment.
"Or, we can come see you." Donna said it like it was a question.
"If you want, but my apartment is dusty as all hell. I haven't been
back in a year." I explained.
"That's okay, I understand." Donna replied. "What's your address?"
I gave Donna my address, advising her on what route to let the cab
driver take so she wouldn't get taken.
"So, I'll see you after awhile?" I asked as I snubbed out my
cigarette.
"Yeah, we'll be there in just a few minutes."
"Who's 'we'?" It was too late, the phone was dead.
I groaned loudly as I walked over to the door and gathered up all my
bags. I hauled them into my bedroom and chunked them on the bed.
Unpacking did not come to mind. If I got done with this business with
Donna quickly enough, I could be on a flight to L.A. tonight to catch up
with the guys.
I walked around the whole apartment, opening the blinds and windows
wide so that a breeze and the sunlight could get in. The place didn't
smell or look too bad with all the light and spring air coming in.
Ofcourse, I'd have to atleast dust before I left again. I couldn't leave
New York knowing that my apartment was this dirty and I wasn't doing
anything about it. It wouldn't kill me to do a little domestic work for
once in the last six months.
The fridge was completely bare, I observed as I opened the door.
Ofcourse, that was probably a good thing since after a year anything would
have been petrified. There was ice in the freezer, though. I had
absolutely nothing to offer Donna when she showed up. After contemplating
it for a couple seconds, I grabbed some money out of my backpack, my keys
and lit a cigarette as I headed out the door. I carefully locked the door
behind me and headed downstairs to the street. I could make it to the
corner store and back before Donna showed up.
(Part Seven)
I stood up and stretched as I finished putting the sodas in the
fridge, along with a few beers. Never knew when you'd need one of those.
I had bought a twelve pack of coke, a six of Heineken and some chips and
other munchie things. I had bought a bottle of Jack Daniel's, too, but
that was to take back to the tour. As soon as I finished stretching, the
buzzer for the door went off. I walked to the door and clicked the button.
"Hello?"
"Matt, it's Donna."
"Come on up." I buzzed her in and lit another cigarette.
I had just enough time to go in and throw the sacks from the store
away before I heard a knock on the door. I suddenly got a lump in my
throat, and stood in the kitchen, looking at the door. The knock came
again and I swallowed quickly and walked ing over. Surely this isn't
Donna, I thought to myself as I saw the very thin woman staring at me. Not
that Donna was ever fat or even big, but she was healthy looking always.
This version of her that stood in frotn of me smiling was not quite how I
pictured her looking. I'd have gone so far as to say she looked sick.
"Donna?" I shook my head as I looked at her.
"Mattie!" She squealed and pulled me in to hug her.
She probably couldn't have forced me to hug her no matter how hard
she tried. It was like an ant trying to move a bowling ball. I allowed
her to pull me into her and gave her a gentle hug. Donna didn't seem to
want to let go, she just clutched me to her. I let her hold onto me until
I heard a small cough about three feet below us. I looked over Donna's
shoulder as best I could. There was a little boy standing about four feet
behind her. I cocked my head as I looked at him. He had brown hair and
looked like me. He looked like a Thompson, anyway. His eyes were such a
pale blue they were almost grey. I knew immediately who he was.
"Is, um, that you're son?" My mouth was still next to Donna's ear.
"That's Booker." Donna pulled away slowly and looked at me.
"Booker, come meet your Uncle Matt."
Uncle?!?! I watched the kid as he cautiously walked forward to
stand at his mother's side. He clutched her leg tightly as I looked down
at him. He couldn't be any older than four. There was no mistaking that
he was my nephew. When I looked down at him, it was like looking into my
own eyes.
"Booker, say 'hello' to your Uncle Matt." Donna smiled down at him
and ran a hand thru his hair.
He looked up at me like he wasn't too sure.
"Hi." He squeaked so low I could barely hear him.
I had to smile. I squatted down 'til my eyes were even with his and
gave him a warm smile. No matter how upset I was with Donna about not
calling me for five years, he had to be the cutest kid I had ever seen.
Booker looked back at me and examined my smile, then gave me a huge smile
back. I thought the sides of his mouth would touch his ears.
"Wanna give your uncle a hug?" I asked.
He didn't answer, he just came forward, still being a bit cautious
and then suddenly wrapped his arms around my neck. I hugged him tightly,
then lifted him, carrying him into the apartment as Donna followed. Donna
closed the door behind her as I carried Booker over to the couch and set
him down. I stood beside the couch, looking down at Booker, then at Donna,
then back again at my nephew.
"Um, do you guys want something to drink?" I asked, not really
knowing what to say to either of them.
"Yes, please." Donna gave a slight smile and walked over to sit
beside Booker.
"Uh, cokes?"
"Do you have any juice?" Donna glanced down at Booker.
"Well, I have either coke or Heineken." I tried to make a joke.
"Coke will be fine." She grinned.
"What about for you?" I asked.
"Water." She frowned all of the sudden.
"Okay, will do."
I rushed into the kitchen as quickly as I could. I don't know why,
but I really didn't want to see Donna anymore. She looked different, she
had a kid that was four years old that she never told me about, and damnit,
I was supposed to be in San Diego with Brian. Then I should be in Los
Angeles, then San Francisco. New York wasn't on the agenda for a long,
long time. I got two glasses of ice and filled one with coke and the other
with water. I grabbed a can of coke out of the fridge for myself.
I gave a long sigh as I collected all three up and went into the
living room. Donna was still where I left her on the couch. Booker was on
the floor playing with some toy car he had produced out of thin air. Donna
accepted the glass of water from me with a smile and set in on the coffee
table before beginning to dig in her purse. I set Booker's glass on the
end of the table by him. He grinned up at me widely then went back to
paying attention to his car. I looked them both over then plopped down in
the chair a few feet away from Donna.
"Where did I put those darn pills?" Donna muttered to herself as
she dug thru her purse like she had lost her mind.
"Do you need some Tylenol or something? I might have some in the
bathroom." I began to get up.
"Oh, no thank you sweetie, I need my pills." Donna sighed as she
finally pulled out what looked like a bundle of five pill bottles.
"I don't know how you couldn't find that cluster of bottles in a
purse that small." I laughed lowly.
"My eyes are getting bad in my old age." Donna glanced over at
Booker.
"You're what--twenty-nine?" I giggled.
"Yeah." Donna shivered and opened the first bottle.
I watched Donna as she opened the bottle, dug a pill out, popped it
in her mouth. She did this five times until she had taken a pill from each
bottle. She took another sip of water then chunked all five bottles into
her purse. She zipped up her purse and set it down by her feet. Donna
took another drink of her water, then looked up to catch me staring at her
with morbid fascination.
"They're not illegal." She teased.
"What're they all for?" I asked a little too quickly.
"Pain mostly. I hate taking them, but there's no time for pain when
you have a four year old." Donna gave a weird smile as she looked at
Booker.
Booker was still intent to ignore us and play with his car.
"Are you sick or something?" I asked with a frown.
"Booker, stay here and play. Don't tear up any of your uncle's
stuff, okay sweetie?" Donna kept her eyes on me as she spoke to Booker.
"Okay." Booker didn't even look up as he pulled another car out of
his pocket.
Donna stood quickly, and I followed suit. I didn't have the first
Earthly idea what she was doing. I followed her thru the kitchen to the
sliding glass door that led to the balcony. As Donna slid the door back,
she gave a groan like it took alot out of her to do it. She stepped out
onto the balcony and I followed, closing the door behind us slowly.
"Leave it open a bit so I can hear Booker." Donna stated as she
walked over and leaned against the railing.
"Aight." I replied shortly and opened it back up about six inches.
"So, what's been going on in your life?" Donna asked as I reached
into my pocket and pulled out a cigarette.
"Why? Don't tell me you came back after five years to ask me that
question." I mumbled then lit my smoke.
"Matt, do you think it was easy for me to leave my sister and
brother behind? Do you think it didn't kill me to do that?" Donna asked
with wide, innocent eyes.
"Do you think I give a fuck?" I replied calmly as I exhaled smoke.
"Matt!" Donna looked shocked.
"What? Do you expect me to bow down to you now that you've returned
after five years? I mean, you've been gone for a long time without a
letter, postcard, phone call or anything. When you left, you didn't say
goodbye, fuck you, nothing. Don't expect me to be gracious." I took
another drag off my smoke when I paused.
"Well...."
"And now I seem to have a four-year-old nephew I knew nothing about.
That's like the cherry on the cake. After five years, yeah I'm very glad
to see you, Donna. Thank you so very much for coming back and gracing my
presence. Thank you so very much for remembering that I'm still alive.
I'll send Kylie your best."
"That's not fair, Matt. You know I had no choice. That old bitty
kicked me out of the house." Donna threw her hands up.
"That's right. She threw you out of the house, not out of my life.
That was your own choice, so don't give me any guilt trips for being mad at
you. That story doesn't work with me." I sneered.
"Matt, I didn't mean to hurt you." Donna lowered her head.
"Well, you did." I stated simply and plopped down in one of the
patio chairs, feeling defeated.
"I just want you to know how sorry I am." Donna pulled up a chair
and sat down next to me, putting a hand on my knee.
"It's okay, I don't know why I'm yelling at you, I'm not even really
mad at you." I tried to smile.
"Well, I understand."
"I just wish our mother wasn't a total psychopathic bitch." I
teased.
"To put it mildly." Donna laughed.
"I'm glad you're here. Really I am." I swallowed my pride and
smiled at her.
"I'm glad to hear that." Donna smiled, then lowered her head.
"Matt, to be honest, I didn't just come to New York to see you. Don't get
me wrong, I'm thrilled to death to see my baby brother again, but I sort of
have an ulterior motive."
"What is it?" I squinted my eyes.
"Momma!!" We both looked up quickly to see Booker standing in the
doorway looking at us.
"What is it, Booker?" Donna looked over at him, the smile returning
to her face.
"I'm hungry." Booker groaned dramatically, making me giggle.
"Me too, buddy." Donna reached over and opened the door with much
struggle so he could come out.
"Well guys, I don't have much to eat around here." I felt ashamed
that I hadn't bought more to eat besides chips.
"That's okay, we planned to go eat dinner later." Donna petted
Booker's head as he crawled up into her lap.
"Ya'll haven't eaten?" I asked.
"No, we were both just so excited to come see you that we decided to
wait." Donna slapped my knee.
There was just something about her grip, her slapping, her movements
that let me know she didn't have any strength left in her. I knew
something was wrong with her, she looked downright sickly. I didn't know
if it was because she had a four year old child to raise and look after and
had no sleep, or it was something more severe, but I decided to drop the
whole issue.
"How about dinner? It's on me." I reached over and ruffled
Booker's hair.
"That sounds like a good idea." Donna laughed.
Booker motioned for his mother to lean down. She smiled and leaned
down where he could whisper in her ear. As he spoke into her ear, her grin
got wider.
"Mattie, Booker wants to know if we can go to McDonald's?" Donna
laughed.
"I think we can arrange that." I laughed with her and stood.
I opened the door and was about to walk into the house when I heard
Donna call my name. I turned around to see her still sitting in the chair
with Booker in her lap.
"What?" I cocked my head as I looked at her.
"Would you mind...." Donna motioned at Booker.
"Um, no problem." I walked over and reached down, picking Booker
up.
"Thanks, sweetie." Donna slowly pulled herself up out of the chair.
"Mind if your old uncle carries you, buddy?" I spoke to Booker as
we walked into the house.
Booker didn't answer at first, he just giggled.
"I want a Happy Meal." Booker whispered to me.
"I think we can do that." I ruffled his hair again as I reached
down with one hand and scooped up my backpack.
"Nuggis." Booker spoke louder.
"We can get you some Nuggets, buddy." I laughed at his
pronunciation as Donna smiled at us.
"Well, come on girl, the boy is hungry." I teased as I opened the
front door for her.
"Thank you, sir." Donna exited slowly and waited for me as I closed
the door.
(Part Eight)
"He's too cute." I smiled as Donna and I watched Booker playing on
the slide as we sat and picked at our food.
"He's my baby boy." Donna smiled wide.
"I bet he is."
"Yeah, my baby boy also made a mess." Donna sighed as she looked at
where Booker had been sitting.
French fries were scattered all over and ketchup decorated the table
top in spots.
"I'll clean it up, don't worry." I reached over and patted her
shoulder.
"Thanks, sweetie." She sighed and looked down at her half eaten
sandwhich and fries.
"You want any of this?" I pointed to my fries.
"Oh, no thanks. I don't think I can finish the rest of mine." She
replied as she pushed her tray away.
"Same here."
"So, what's been going on in your life?" Donna asked quickly.
"Oh, I've been in some movies." I teased.
"Yeah, I saw that. I especially liked Into The Sun." Donna smiled.
"Well, thank you." I acted like I was bashful.
"How long have you been in New York?"
"Well, I got the apartment about two years ago, but I've been gone
off and on." I replied before I took a sip of my milkshake.
"How's the love life?" Donna asked, almost making me spit my drink
across the table at her.
"What is this? The third degree?" I tried to recuperate some of my
pride.
"No, why?" Donna asked.
"You sure are asking alot of questions." I giggled nervously.
"I haven't seen my baby brother in five years, I'm entitled to ask
you what is going on in your life. I have a right to know as your sister."
Donna acted innocent.
"Fine. The love life is very good, thank you very much." I replied
and then blew her off as I took a sip of my milkshake again.
"Who's the lucky lady?"
"See, there you go again." I waved my hand at her and tried to not
look directly at her.
"What's wrong, Matt?" Donna leaned in close to me.
"Nothing."
"Well then just tell me who it is." Donna replied.
"The lady ain't so lucky. But the guy is." I stated and looked her
right in the eye.
"Which guy?"
"Brian Littrell. He's a Backstreet Boy."
"Oh." Donna picked up a fry and shoved it in her mouth.
"Does that shock you?" I asked quickly.
"No. Kylie actually told me when I called to talk to her, but I
just wanted to see if you'd tell me." Donna laughed.
"If I had not seen you in five years, I'd be calling you a bitch
right now." I joined in her laughter.
"Well, I probably would deserve it, but I had to do it. I think
it's fine, sweetie. Besides, Kylie and I pretty much knew before I left
that you were gay." Donna explained.
"That's what Kylie told me once." I sighed.
"Woman's instinct I suppose." Donna shrugged as Booker came running
up.
"Momma!" I smiled wide as he yelled the word. "Come pway!"
"Buddy, momma's too tired to come play on the slide." Donna frowned
like it hurt her to say it.
"Will you come pway?" Booker turned to me, his hand out to me, his
mother's answer not fazing him one bit.
"Alright, buddy. Wait here, momma." I turned to Donna and smiled
as I took Booker's hand and headed over to the slide with him.
"You boys be good." Donna hollered after us.
"You know, you and Booker don't need to pay for those expensive
prices at The Plaza, Donna. You guys can shack up at my apartment while
you're here." I spoke lowly to her as we sat in the back of the cab.
Booker had fallen asleep right when we got in the back. His head
was resting in my lap, his feet stretched all the way over to his mother's
legs. I slowly stroked his hair as he rested quietly.
"I couldn't put you out like that." Donna shook her head.
"Hey, you made me leave the tour and catch the first flight back
here and you think staying at my apartment will put me out?" I teased.
"That's true." Donna turned her head to look at me as we headed
down Broadway.
"My point exactly. Let's go to The Plaza, get your stuff and take
it over to my place. I won't take no for an answer. I have two guest
bedrooms, so you'll both have a place to sleep." I made my case stronger.
"Okay, you don't have to twist my arm."
"Take us to The Plaza." I told the cab driver, then felt the cab
make a sharp right turn.
"You really don't mind?" Donna asked as the cab went back to a
normal angle.
"I'd mind if you didn't stay with me." I replied.
"Thank you." Donna's smile lit up the whole backseat.
"No problemo, sista." I reached over and patted her shoulder.
We finally arrived at The Plaza. Donna told me to wait down in the
cab with Booker while she went and packed their stuff quickly. I did as I
was told, glad that the cabs only charge by distance, not time. However, I
expected to be waiting for quite awhile, but within fifteen minutes, Donna
was back in the cab. We sat there and waited for the cab driver to stow
all the bags in the trunk.
"You made quick work of that." I smiled at her.
"I'm a woman on a mission." Donna replied with a sly grin.
"Well, I hope you can carry alot of those up the stairs if I had to
carry this little turd." I giggled as I stroked Booker's hair.
"We'll manage." Donna replied confidently as the cab driver got
back in and took off towards my apartment.
It wasn't long before the cab was parked outside of my apartment
building. I was more than thrilled when the cab driver got out and
unloaded the bags, then proceeded to carry as many as he could up the
stairs for us, leaving Donna to carry only two as I cradled Booker in my
arms. It was quite a chore to balance him in my arms and get the door
open, but I managed. After I had carried Booker back to the guest room by
my bedroom, I went back and paid the driver, giving him a generous tip. He
acted more than grateful for the good sized tip before leaving.
"Well, which bags are yours, which are Booker's?" I exhaled heavily
as I looked down at the six bags on the floor.
"All of them are his except this one." Donna replied as she picked
up a suitcase.
"Well, atleast one of you travels light." I teased as I grabbed two
of the bags and carried them into the room Booker was in, trying to be as
quiet as possible.
One more trip, and I had all the bags put away. Donna followed me
in on my last trip and took undressed Booker and took off his shoes, then
put his PJ's on him. His body was completely limp. No matter how roughly
she moved him, he didn't wake up. Finally, after he was dressed for bed,
she pulled the covers out from underneath him and pulled them up to his
chin, tucking him in. She gave him a kiss on the forehead and smiled as we
both exited the room quietly.
I showed Donna to the other guest room and watched as she chunked
her suitcase on the bed and quickly took her shoes off. I laughed as I
watched her get more comfortable. I was very glad she was already at ease
in my apartment. Usually, staying in a strange place makes you more
reserved, but not my sister. She was definitely just like me. She could
be at home anywhere.
"You wouldn't happen to have anything to drink around here, would
you?" Donna practically whispered.
"I pretty much just have coke or water." I blushed.
"What about something stronger?" Donna grinned evily.
"Oh, well in that case, I've got alot to drink." I laughed and
walked off towards the kitchen, Donna right at my heels.
I went into the kitchen as Donna waited by the bar patiently. I
grabbed two glasses, put ice in them and grabbed the whiskey and a can of
coke from the fridge. Donna practically drooled as I poured a healthy
portion of whiskey in each glass, then filled them the rest of the way up
with coke.
"Here ya' go." I held a glass out to her and she took it quickly
and graciously.
"Thank you very, very much." Donna took a quick sip.
"No prob." I smiled and led the way to the living room.
Donna groaned as she plopped down on the sofa. I kicked my sneakers
off and fell into the other end of the couch.
"This is so much better." Donna stated as she took another sip of
her drink, then set it on the coffee table.
"Isn't it though?" I grinned.
"Remind me to tell you something after I finish this drink." Donna
sighed, then picked up her glass and began to chug it.
"Whoa, girl." I laughed nervously.
Donna turned her eyes to look at me for a second while she drained
her glass. As soon as the last drop was gone, she set the glass back down
on the table as lady-like as she could after chugging like a man.
"Tell me something." I teased.
"Let the drink kick in first." Donna looked down at her lap.
"Donna, what's wrong? You've been trying to tell me something all
day." I grabbed her arm.
"It's just something that's hard to tell you. And I don't know how
you'll take it, and I don't know if you'll do me the huge favor I'm going
to ask of you." Donna looked up slowly into my eyes.
"Please tell me you're not going to ask me for money." I pulled
away slowly.
"Mattie, Roger left me well off, I don't need your money." Donna
seemed pissed that I'd even think it.
"I'm sorry, it's just, you know." I turned red. "Wait a second,
what do you mean 'Roger left me well of'? Who's Roger?"
"Oh yeah, you don't know about him." Donna took her turn blushing.
"Who is Roger?"
"He's the guy I left with five years ago. Booker's father." She
slowly explained. "Well, he died about two years after I left home.
Ofcourse, since we were married, I got everything that was his. Trust me,
I don't need for anything, and niether..."
I waited patiently as Donna trailed off. After a full minute of
silence, I was growing impatient.
"Booker?" I asked quickly, rushing her.
"Well, Booker is in need of something very important." Donna turned
to look at me again.
"What is it? If you have money, what possibly could he need?" I
was confused by this whole situation.
Donna just sat there again, finding something very interesting in
her lap. After watching her just sit there forever, I was growing very
impatient.
"What does Booker need, Donna?" I stammered.
"This is so hard for me, Matt." Donna got misty eyed.
"Damnit, Donna. Just tell me what Booker needs. I know you didn't
come all this way to piddle ass around."
"He needs a new parent soon, Matt."
"Do what?" I was totally confused now.
"Well, with Roger gone, I have no one else to turn to, Matt." A
single tear streamed down Donna's cheek.
"Well, he has you. We didn't have much of a father and we didn't
turn out too damn bad, did we?" I asked, flinging my hands up in the air
for emphasis.
Donna got up and walked over to the window on the right side of the
T.V. She leaned up against the wall and looked out, her back to me. I
sighed heavily and got up to follow her over. I walked up behind Donna and
laid a hand on her shoulder. Donna looked out the window for a few more
seconds, then began to cry, her tears streaming down her face freely. I
turned Donna around slowly and let her fall against my chest as I held her
and let her cry into my shirt, her sobs getting louder.
"Donna, he'll be fine. Having a father isn't the most important
thing in the world. Kids are pretty fucking resilient, ya' know. With a
great mom like you..."
"Matt, I'm fucking dying." Donna actually used the "f word".
I pulled away from Donna just far enough to be able to look into her
eyes. I thought maybe I was dreaming it, or this was some sick joke, but
when I looked into her eyes, I knew the truth. She was dying. From what?
"What the hell are you talking about?" I felt my eyes getting misty
from looking at her.
"Booker isn't going to have a mother for much longer either, Matt.
I'm sick, and it's not going to be long before..." Donna started bawling
again, flinging herself into my chest.
I didn't know what to do, I just clutched Donna tighter to me and
smothered the top of her head in kisses and hugged her as tight as I could.
I felt my chest getting wetter and wetter as Donna cried against me, her
sobbing making my body shake with hers.
"Come on." I drug Donna over towards the couch.
I lowered Donna to the couch until she was sitting comfortably, then
sat down next to her and held her hands in mine. I stayed patient this
time while she gathered her thoughts, not rushing her as I let her work on
stopping crying while I held her hands.
"I don't know where to begin, Matt." Donna gushed, her tears slowly
coming to a stop.
"How about five years ago. Friday afternoon. Why don't you start
there?" I helped her out.
"Okay, just bear with me, this is gonna take forever." Donna
sighed, then wiped her eyes.
(Part Nine)
"Matt, what the hell are you babbling about?" Nick's voice made me
cry even more.
I tried to form a sentence, but the tears were just flowing free. I
couldn't stop them. My sister, whom I hadn't seen in five years was dying.
And she wanted me to do her the small favor of raising my nephew for the
next fourteen to seventeen years. Nick only knew it was me because I had
been able to squeak that out before I began tearing up.
"Matt, you better say something or I'm going to freak out. What's
wrong, boy? Say something or I'm going to start crying with you." Nick
sounded choked up.
"Brian. I want to talk to Brian, Nick." I croaked out.
"He's not here right now--he ran down to McDonald's for us. He
should be back in anytime, he left like thirty minutes ago." Nick began.
"Tell him to call me back as soon as he gets back." I stated.
"No, you're not getting off this phone. You don't have to tell me
what's wrong if you don't want, but I'm not letting you off this phone 'til
Brian gets here to talk to you, boy." Nick ordered.
Well, that was all it took to get me crying again. I was so glad
that Donna had finally calmed down enough to go to bed. I definitely
didn't want her to see me break down like this. After I cried for several
more minutes straight, I proceeded to tell Nick about my sister. The man
she ran away with five years ago had died when a drunk driver hit him head
on. Roger, my sister's husband, had had more money than she knew what to
do with for the rest of her life. Just as things were beginning to look up
after his death, Donna found out he had left her more than a fortune.
Donna had contracted HIV from Roger. She insisted that it had to
have been him because he was the only guy she had ever been with. I told
Nick I hadn't tried to explain to her that that wasn't the only way to
catch it, but I didn't want to know whether was sister was an I.V. drug
user at any point in her life. How the doctors hadn't caught onto this
while she was pregnant, no one knows, but she was definitely positive.
To add insult to injury, Donna had had every damn sickness come her
way. She was catching everything that was in season--or not in season for
that matter. For the last three years, she had been having Booker tested
every six months, but everyone of the tests was negative. Three months
ago, she had been diagnosed with some disease--which I told Nick I couldn't
even remember or pronounce to save my life at this point--and she had six
months to live. Correction, she had six months to live three months ago.
That was the optimistic quote the doctor gave her anyway. It could really
be anytime.
It was sort of like cancer of the brain, except it was more like
lesions. Shit, I didn't know what to call it because I had been in a daze
when she had told me. I just knew the word dying and sick had been
mentioned several times. Nick listened carefully, not interrupting me,
just letting me talk. He was very patient with me considering I was
blubbering and probably not making a lick of sense, especially since they
had just found out a couple days ago that I had ever had an older sister.
"And that's what is making me cry so damn much." I tried to laugh,
but another bout with tears came out instead.
"Boy, that's quite a story. It's no wonder you're crying." Nick
spoke slowly and compassionately.
Before I could say anything else, I heard A.J. in the background
talking to someone. Then I heard Brian say something that sounded like he
was upset, then I heard what sounded like someone ripping the phone away
from Nick.
"Baby, what's wrong?" Brian asked frantically.
"Brian, I need you here right now." I explained calm and clearly.
"Are you okay?" Brian ignored me.
"I'm fine, but I need you here."
"I'm on the next plane."
"Okay, I'll be here. Please hurry." I felt like I was going to cry
again.
midnight, I'll be there about ten, k?" Brian stated.
"Okay, baby. Just hurry, I really need you. I gotta go." I had to
hang up before I started crying and delayed Brian.
"I love you, baby. Bye."
"I love you, too." Then I hung up.
I stood by the phone for a minute, half expecting Brian to call
right back to say he couldn't come for whatever reason. When the phone
didn't ring for a good five minutes, I drug myself over to the living room
and sat down on the couch. I sat there for a good while, just listening
the faint hum of the traffic in the city, trying to keep my tears back.
When I couldn't stand to be awake any longer, I laid down, curling up into
a ball, hugging my knees to my chest. I looked at the VCR and saw that it
was half past four. It was only twelve-thirty back in California where
Brian was catching his flight. It would probably be ten o'clock before he
got here. I sighed loudly and shut my eyes, letting sleep overtake me.
I slowly was brought back to life by the feeling of a hand on my
arm, shaking gently. I could tell by how small the hand was that it wasn't
Brian. I let my eyes flutter open. It was still dark in the apartment,
with a small crack of pre-dawn light making red streaks across the ceiling.
My eyes finally focused and I saw who was shaking me. Booker stood in
front of the couch, the huge comforter from his bed trailing behind him,
one corner in his hand. He must have drug the huge blanket all the way
from there to the couch.
"What's wrong, buddy?" I asked sleepily.
"Where's momma?" I could see the making of tears in his eyes.
"She's in the other bedroom."
"She always sleeps with me." A single tear streamed down Booker's
cheek.
"She's really tired, buddy. What's wrong?" I tried to wake up a
bit before forming too much of a sentence.
"It's scary in there, though." He leaned down and whispered in my
ear, then looked over his shoulder like someone would be coming after him.
I gave a small laugh and ruffled his hair, then pulled him down on
the couch.
"Come on, buddy." I pulled him close to me, then sat up far enough
to pull the comforter up on the couch with us.
I laid the cover over us, making sure that Booker would have enough
blanket to keep him warm, then draped my arm over him, holding him to me
tightly. He squirmed around a bit 'til he decided he was comfortable, then
snuggled back towards me. Finally, he broke the silence.
"Why you sleeping here?" He had caught me.
"'Cause I knew you'd need me." I hugged him tightly.
Booker laid there for a minute as I held them, then spoke up.
"I'm glad you are sleeping here."
"Me too, buddy." I laughed slightly and let me eyes close.
I laid there and held Booker tightly to me, feeling his tiny body
move up and down as he breathed. I felt sleep slowly overtaking me. He
wasn't quite as good as snuggling with Brian, but he wasn't bad.
(Part Ten)
"Wake up, Matt." I felt someone else shaking me.
I slowly rolled my neck as I woke up, mad that I hadn't slept on a
bed. I tried to give Booker a "early morning hug" but my arms were empty.
I sat up immediately, wondering where the small child that had been
sleeping with me had gone to. I saw Donna standing in front of me, waiting
for me to respond.
"Where's Booker?" I asked quickly.
"McDonald's."
"Alone???" I wasn't quite awake.
"No, he's at McDonald's with Brian." Donna laughed at me.
I quickly glanced over at the clock. It was just now ten o'clock.
"Brian? He's not supposed to be here until now." I stammered.
"He got here at nine o'clock. Don't worry, Booker is definitely
with Brian. I recognized Brian from pictures I'd seen. And he also had a
key to the apartment, so I figured he was probably the right Brian." Donna
sat down on the edge of the couch as she teased me.
"Sorry, but I'm not exactly good in the mornings." I giggled and
began to rub my eyes.
"That's okay. I think your boyfriend has fallen in love with Booker
already." Donna laughed as she got up and walked towards the kitchen.
"What do you mean?"
"As soon as he saw Booker, and Booker saw him, they were playing
around. Booker was actually talking to him. Booker doesn't talk to
strangers." Donna seemed very happy.
"What can I say? Brian's good with kids." I sighed.
"That's for sure." Donna beamed as she walked into the kitchen.
I sat there for a moment as the sound of water running from the
faucet in the kitchen filled the silence.
"Donna, let me ask you something." I spoke loudly so she could hear
me in the kitchen.
"What, Mattie?" She chirped.
"Why do you want me to take him? Wouldn't mom be a much better
choice?" I asked quickly.
"That psychotic bitch? I don't think so. I want him to grow up
with two parents that will love him and support him and let him be who he
is. I don't want him to be stifled by her or have to live in the house of
horrors, either." Donna walked into the living room as she explained.
"Even if those two parents are fags?" I was using harsh words to
extend my point.
"Well, I don't like that word, but yes. Two gay men that love and
take care of you is better than one psychotic bitch and a hippy pot smoker
that will make you wish you were never born. I like Brian by the way."
"I love him."
"I can tell he loves you." Donna smiled down at me as she sat on
the arm of the couch by me.
"Really?"
"Yes, we didn't have long to talk before Booker got Brian to take
him to McDonald's, but you should see the way his face lights up when he
talks about you. You should see the way he looks at you when you sleep.
It's very sweet." Donna's eyes were shiny from the thought.
"Really?" I wasn't too surprised, but it sounded so nice--I wanted
to hear more about how much Brian loved me.
"Really. And I can tell you love him. I'd rather have two
responsible, loving 'fags'--as you so nicely put it--take care of Booker
than that mean old bitch. This is why I asked you." Donna replied slowly.
"I gotcha. What makes you think I'm responsible, though?" I
teased.
"Well, I guess you'll find out if you're responsible or not, won't
you?" Donna ruffled my hair and headed towards the balcony.
"He's just the cutest little kid, Matt." Brian smiled widely as he
crawled under the covers next to me.
"Yeah, he is." I smiled at Brian as he leaned over to kiss me on
the lips.
"I'm glad she wants you to take him." Brian held me around the
waist and laid his face on my chest.
"Well, I didn't tell her I would, yet." I ruffled his hair.
"Oh please, we can take him. I always wanted to be a daddy." Brian
sighed contentedly.
"Well, maybe I don't want to be a mommy!" I laughed.
Brian laughed with me for a minute, then looked me in the eye.
"You're serious, aren't you? You're seriously considering telling
her no, aren't you?" Brian looked shocked.
"Brian, I can barely take care of me. How am I going to take care
of a four year old?" I sighed.
"I'll help you."
"I know you would baby. But you know, I'm gonna turn twenty-two
just this summer. I didn't think I'd ever have a kid. I certainly didn't
think I'd have one this young. I'm off filming all the time, you're on
tour or recording. That's just not a life for a young kid. And how do you
think he'll grow up with two daddies?" I stated my case.
"What's wrong with two daddies?" Brian got defensive.
"Nothing is wrong with it as far as I'm concerned. But most little
kids in kindergarten will have a mommy and a daddy. What will they think
of Booker's two daddies?"
"Who cares what they think?" Brian stated angrily.
"I do, Brian. Well, frankly I could give a fuck what they think
about me. I do care what they might say to Booker. Or what they might
call him. Most people don't take kindly to gay guys. They especially
don't take kindly to a gay couple raising a young boy. Even if we have the
best intentions and work our asses off to raise a great kid, will it work
for Booker?"
"Can't we find out?" Brian looked up at me.
"Brian, you're probably the best person I know. And you'd be a
great daddy. But that's not what matters. Let's not think about what we
want, let's think about Booker, okay baby?" I ran a hand thru his hair.
"Matt, I know you have some good points here. But I can't see
saying no. Step up and just take responsibility and jump over the
obstacles as they come. This isn't something you think out at length.
This is a life that's in your hands. He needs a home, we have a home. It
may not be a traditional home, but I bet we can raise him as good as anyone
else." Brian replied.
"Well, I just think...."
The door to our room swung open with a slow creak. Booker stood
there, his blanket in hand again. He hadn't been in bed more than an hour.
"What's wrong, buddy?" I asked.
"Can I sleep in here?" Booker looked up at me.
"Come on." I patted the bed between Brian and myself.
Booker padded over to the bed quickly, a smile on his face, blanket
in tow. I grabbed him under his arms and pulled him carefully up onto the
bed and laid him between us. Brian helped me cover him with his blanket
while Booker looked up at us. I guess that wasn't what Booker wanted
because he rolled over towards me and snuggled up close to me, but didn't
close his eyes.
"Why he sleeping in here with you?" Booker looked up at me.
Oh this was going to be good. Brian just laughed.
"It's scary in his room, too." I replied and ruffled Booker's hair.
"I thought so." Booker looked slyly at Brian. "Where's his
blanket?"
"I'm letting him borrow mine." I replied, trying to think of smart
ways to answer without having to introduce the kid too early to the concept
of sex.
"Momma said you were good at taking care of people." Booker smiled
up at me.
"She did, huh?"
"Uh huh. She said you took care of her when you were young."
Booker brought up some old memories without even trying.
"You took care of her?" Brian got a confused look on his face.
"Let's get to sleep, okay buddy?" I smiled at Booker and kissed him
on the forehead.
"Okay." Booker snuggled up as close as he could to me.
Brian snuggled up as close as he could to Booker, and I laid there,
wondering what to do. Even after I heard Booker breathing softly and Brian
snoring lightly, I couldn't sleep. I didn't know what the hell to do about
this.
TO BE CONTINUED....