Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 15:05:40 EDT
From: D LS <dls_stories@hotmail.com>
Subject: Brian and Me 19-21

Okay, first things first.  This story is a complete work of fiction, and is
not meant to imply anything about anyone.  While some of the characters may
be loosely based on real people that I know, none are meant to actually
represent anyone, particularly any of the members of the Backstreet Boys.
We may wish that they were gay, and maybe some of them even are, but I'm
certainly not about to say that they are. :) If any of them happen to be
reading this (hey, we can dream can't we?), feel free to drop me a line and
let me know what you think.

As usual, if you are offended or made uncomfortable by material concerning
sexual relations between consenting adult men, lighten up or go somewhere
else.  Also, if it is in any way illegal for you to be reading this type of
thing, please don't.  Or do, just don't get caught and feel *very* guilty.
;)

I've received a lot of very positive emails about the story.  Everyone
seems to be enjoying it, and I'm really glad.  I'm trying to make it as
realistic as possible, and input from readers is really helping.  I thank
everyone for their input, and encourage you to let me know what you think
of the coming chapters.

I want to thank everyone who has taken the time to write, and again,
special thanks to JB for looking this over before I sent it in.  What you
are about to read makes a little more sense because of him. :)

This is my first time writing a story like this, and it's also my first
time letting other people read anything that I've written, so I appreciate
any and all comments (good and bad) that any of you may have.  If they're
bad, please support your opinions so that I can improve.

Drop me a line at DLS_stories@hotmail.com

Enjoy!


First of all, I wanted to note that, since the Roman Numerals were becoming
tedious, I've decided to go with Plain Old Numerals from here on out. ;)


     PART 19

     We managed to not hold hands until the elevator doors had closed, but
as soon as they had, our hands came together seemingly of their own accord.
Noticing this, we looked at each other and smiled.

     Getting off on the floor reserved for the Backstreet Boys, we started
for Brian's room, deciding to go looking for the rest of the guys and just
hang out for a while.

     When we got to the room, there was no one there.  Walking inside,
Brian excused himself to use the washroom.  While he was gone, I wandered
around the room, gradually making my way to the balcony.  Before I could
step outside, I noticed something on the table just inside the balcony
door.  Picking it up, I couldn't help but smile.

     "Nate?" I heard Brian ask from behind me.

     "Right here," I said, turning to face him.  "Just doing a little light
reading."  I held up the copy of my book that I had found.  "This Nathaniel
Healy guy is really good, dontcha think?" I asked with a smile.

     Brian's face went red, and he gave me an embarrassed smile as he
walked over to where I was standing.  "Oh yeah, he's wonderful," he
laughed.

     "When did you pick this up?" I asked, leafing through it and stopping
at the author's photo inside the back cover.  "Ugh," I said as I slammed
the book shut.  "Even professional photographers can't get a good picture
of me."

     "I like it," he said, taking the book from me and opening the back
cover again.  "I bought it at the airport before we flew into LA."

     "Awww," I said, giving him a peck on the cheek.  "And how do you like
it so far?" I asked, noting that the bookmark was only about a third of the
way into the book.

     "Well, I haven't had a whole lot of time to read it, but I love it so
far.  Rosie knew what she was talking about."

     For that, he got a peck on the lips.  I was touched that he had
actually gone out and bought my book.  Of course, had he asked I could have
given him a copy, but somehow this felt better.  "Thank you," I said.

     This time it was Brian who kissed me, and it wasn't a peck.  When we
finally broke apart and I opened my eyes, I saw him looking at me with a
smile.  "You're welcome.  Now, want to go and find the rest of the guys?"

     I nodded and started to follow him out of the room, when I happened to
glance at a suitcase sitting on a chair in the corner.  It was literally
overflowing with blue clothes.

     "Brian?"

     "Yeah?" he said, turning back to face me.

     "How come you're not wearing any blue?  I don't think I've ever seen
you without *something* blue on," I said, pointing to the suitcase.

     Brian gave me another embarrassed smile and looked at the eruption of
clothes.  "You said you didn't like blue," he said quietly.

     "What?"

     "You said you didn't like blue.  Earlier on the phone, you said Nick
was disappointed about the lack of blue in your closet.  So, I didn't wear
anything blue."

     How sweet is that?  "You're just too cute for words," I said, smiling
at him.  "But I didn't say I didn't like blue, just that I didn't wear it
much.  You look great in blue."

     Brian smiled up at me as I took his hand and led him from the room.

     Hearing noise from AJ's room, we turned in that direction and Brian
knocked on the door.  We heard the level of noise drop, but there was no
answer, so Brian reached out and knocked again.  This time, someone yelled
and we could hear feet shuffling to the door.

     AJ opened the door with a large grin.  "Hey!  Come on in!" he said,
ushering us inside and closing the door.  Looking around the room, I
noticed Kevin and Nick sitting on a couch.  It was obvious that they had
been watching television, but now everyone in the room was looking at Brian
and I with a smile.
 
     "Well?"  Nick asked, breaking the silence. "How'd it go?"

     In answer, Brian raised his right hand, which still had my left
entwined in it, for everyone to see.  Nick let out a little cheer and
jumped up, rushing over to draw us both into a hug.

     I laughed and hugged him back, being careful to keep my hand in
Brian's.  When Nick moved away, it was AJ's turn, and he moved in for a hug
as well.  Unfortunately, he seemed to want individual hugs, so I was forced
to let go of Brian.  He didn't look any happier about it than I was, but
his grin resurfaced as AJ moved on to him.

     "Congratulations," I heard him whisper.

     "Thanks," Brian responded.  I noticed that he was blushing, and,
raising a hand to touch my own face, found that I was as well.

     AJ moved aside again, and suddenly Kevin was there.  He reached out
and grabbed my hand with a smile.  "Welcome to the family," he said,
glancing over at Brian.

     "Thanks, but we're dating, not married," I laughed as I shook his
hand.
 
     Kevin looked at Brian again, then back to me.  "I know, but he hasn't
been this happy in a long time, and that's all your doing."

     Kevin released my hand and moved to hug Brian, whispering something in
his ear.  Brian laughed and hugged Kevin back, then Kevin stood back again,
looking at us.  I noticed AJ and Nick doing the same thing.

     I leaned over to Brian.  "What are they looking at?" I whispered with
a laugh.

     Brian shrugged and took my hand again.  "Are we going to sit down, or
are you going to stand there gaping all night?"  he asked the other three
in the room.

     His words seemed to get through to them.  All three of them smiled and
made their way back to the couches, making room for Brian and I.  We sat
down on one with AJ, while Kevin and Nick took the other.

     "Where's Howie?" I asked, sitting down.

     "He's still... um... pouting," Nick said with a sad smile.  "He went
right to his room after dinner."

     I nodded.  "Look, guys, I'm really sorry that I'm making things tough
around here.  I don't want you guys fighting just because I'm here."

     Brian immediately sqeezed my hand, as if I had tried to make a run for
the door.  "Fuck Howie," he said.  "He's going to have to get over this.
It's his problem, not ours."

     Kevin nodded his agreement.  "Yeah, I'm sure he just needs some time
to sort everything out.  He wouldn't do anything to hurt the group."

     "I hope you're right," I said, relaxing into my seat.  "I'd hate to
think about you guys going back out on tour with him still acting like he
was this morning."

     At my mention of their leaving, I noticed Nick flash a look to Brian,
who just nodded and gave him an 'I'll tell you later' look and lay his head
on my shoulder, just as he had in the limo.

     "He'll be fine," AJ spoke up for the first time.  I knew that he and
Howie were good friends, having known each other for years before the group
had formed.  "I think in his own way he's trying to protect Brian and the
rest of us."

     "What the hell?" Brian asked, raising his head to look past me to AJ.
"Protect us from what?"

     "Well," AJ replied, trying to calm Brian.  "I think he really has
convinced himself that Nate just wants to get you into bed, and he's afraid
that once that happens, he'll take off and tell the world that you're gay.
And we all know what would happen if he did that."

     "But he won't!" Brian protested.

     "I know that.  We all do," he said, looking around to Kevin and Nick,
then finally to me, making sure that I understood that he really did trust
me.  "But Howie doesn't.  That, on top of how he already felt about you
being gay..." he let his voice trail off, allowing us to fill in the rest.

     "Maybe if I talked to him..." I started.

     "No!" all four of them yelled at the same time, then started to laugh.

     "No," Kevin said again.  "We just need to let him calm down a little
bit.  Let him get used to you being around, and see that you're serious
about this.  The rest of us can talk to him, and try and bring him around.
If you try it, he'll just resent you further for trying to step into what
he sees as 'group business.'"

     I could feel Brian nod his head against my shoulder.  "He's right,
Nate.  There's no way Howie would talk to you about this anyway."

     I sighed and agreed.  "I just don't want you guys fighting about me
and Brian."

     They assured me once again that things would work themselves out
eventually, as long as we didn't push Howie.

     "So what did you guys do tonight?" Nick asked with a smile.  I knew he
was trying to change the topic and get my mind off of Howie, and I silently
thanked him for it.

     "Well, I picked Nate up at the condo, and then..."  Brian filled them
in on our date.  They laughed when they heard about our waiter trying to
pick Brian up, and laughed even harder when Brian told them about my
embarrassing him when he returned to the table to check on us.

     Nick interrupted Brian when he told them what movie we had gone to.
"I really want to see that!" he exclaimed.  "How was it?"

     Brian and I looked at each other and cracked up.

     "What's so funny?"  Nick asked, bewildered.

     "Well," Brian said, still laughing.  "The first couple of minutes were
great!"

     "And I thought the closing credits were riveting," I added, laughing
as the colour rose to my face once again.

     "You didn't," AJ grinned.  Our grins were answer enough for them.

     "Guys," Kevin said, taking on a more serious tone than I had heard him
use before.  "You know I'm all in favour of you two being together, but
that was dangerous.  You know what would happen if someone saw you and
recognised Brian."

     "Relax, Kevin," Brian said.  "No one recognised me, and I doubt anyone
even saw us.  The theatre was dark, and we were sitting in the back
corner."
 
     "Yeah," I added, sitting up a little.  "And no one even recognised
Brian when we got into the limo.  If anyone was going to notice who he was,
it would have been then."

     "Still," Kevin insisted.  "You've got to be more careful in public.
People can't know about you."

     "Alright, we'll be more careful," Brian conceded.  "But that means we
get to be as mushy as we want when we're in private," he said, wrapping his
arms around me and giving me a kiss on the cheek.

     Kevin and the rest of the guys laughed.  "Just try to keep all your
clothes on," he grinned.

     We spent awhile just sitting and watching TV, chatting about nothing
and getting to know each other better.  I was happy that the rest of the
guys seemed eager to accept me into their group, and was soon very
comfortable with all of them.

     "I hate to say it, but I'm bushed," Kevin said suddenly after a couple
of hours, standing from the couch and stretching.  "I'm going to bed."  We
all said goodnight as he made his way to the door.  "Oh, Nate," he said,
turning back to face us.  "Are you staying tonight?"

     The question caught me off guard.  I hadn't really given it much
thought.  Brian and I looked at each other, holding a silent conversation.
I saw my own uncertainty mirrored in his face.

     "Oops!  Sorry, I didn't mean that the way it sounded.  I was just
asking so I knew whether or not to order breakfast for you too," Kevin
said, obviously embarrassed.

     I looked back to Brian and made my decision.  "No, I'm not staying,
Kevin.  I'm heading back to the house."

     "Oh, alright then.  I'll talk to you later," he said with a smile,
which I returned, adding a small wave.  Kevin opened the door and
disappeared through it.

     "You know, I know it makes me a bad host," AJ laughed.  "But I'm
getting kinda tired too, so I'm going to have to kick y'all out."

     Brian, Nick and I all grinned and assured him that we wouldn't hold it
against him, before we too stood up.  We said goodnight to AJ as he walked
us to the door.  As Brian and Nick stepped out into the hall, AJ drew me
aside.

     "I'm really glad you and Brian are together," he said with a smile,
offering me his hand.

     I took it, giving it a shake.  "Thanks."
    "No problem, man," he said, letting go of my hand.  "I'm sure I'll be
seeing you again soon," he laughed.

     "I think it's pretty likely," I smiled, joining Brian and Nick in the
hall.  AJ said goodnight again and closed the door, and our depleted group
walked toward Nick and Brian's door.

     When we reached it, Nick announced that he was going to bed as well,
and wished us both goodnight, giving me a smile.  "I'll see you tomorrow,"
he said to Brian.

     When Nick had closed the door, Brian walked me to the elevator.  I
could tell that there was something on his mind, and waited for him to
speak.

     "Listen, Nate, it's not that I didn't want you to stay tonight,
but..."

     "But, we just had our first date, and it feels like it's too soon," I
finished.  Brian nodded.  "It's alright Brian," I assured him.  "I felt the
same way.  I was so relieved when I looked into your eyes in there and saw
that you were unsure.  I'm almost as new to this as you are."

     At that Brian looked up.  "You mean you haven't?"

     "No.  I've dated a little bit, but nothing ever came of it," I
responded, pulling him into an embrace.  "No pun intended."  Brian smiled
happily and wrapped his arms around me as well.

     "Brian," I said still holding him.

     "Hmmmm," he said against my chest.

     "When it's the right time, we'll both know.  Until then, we'll just
take it one step at a time.  Okay?"

     "Okay," he said, pulling back a little so that we were facing each
other.  He leaned in and brought his lips to mine, bringing his hands to
the back of my head.

     "Mmmmmm," I moaned, parting my lips for his tongue.

     "GET A ROOM!" someone yelled from a few feet away. There was a sudden
flash in the hall.

     Brian and I broke our kiss, jumping a little at the sudden
interruption.  As we turned to face whoever it was, there was another flash
and the whine of a camera winding.  When the afterimage faded a bit, we
could both see AJ standing in the hall in his hotel robe with a huge grin
pasted on his face.

     "Just something for the old photo album," he laughed, holding the
camera up.

     Brian and I couldn't help but laugh.  Brian made as if to grab AJ and
he bolted back into his room with a laugh.  "See you later Nate!" I heard
him yell as the door closed again.

     I laughed again to myself as I pushed the button for the elevator.
Brian came back over to me and pulled me into another hug.  "I'll talk to
you tomorrow?"

     "Sure.  What's your day look like?"

     "All day in the studio, then a couple of meetings in the late
afternoon," he said sadly.  "What about tomorrow night?"

     "No good.  I'm having dinner with Andrea and her parents."  It was my
turn to look sad.

     "Saturday is a pretty full day for us, but how about dinner Saturday
night?"

     "It's a date," I said with a smile.

     "Sure is, and this time I'm planning it."

     The elevator doors opened and we broke apart again with a quick kiss.
"I'll talk to you tomorrow," I said again as I stepped into the elevator.

     "You better," he smiled as the doors closed.


     PART 20

     Andrea was in bed by the time I managed to make it home, so I wandered
into my room, making sure to set my alarm, and fell into bed.  My mind was
racing a mile a minute with everything that had happened, and I was sure
that it would take me forever to fall asleep.  In this, however, I was
wrong, I didn't even have time to pull the sheets up before I was fast
asleep.

     I awoke the next morning very confused.  The light in the room was all
wrong.  I had set my alarm early so that I could get up and talk to Andrea
about my date with Brian, but it was way too bright in the room.  Glancing
over at my clock, I discovered that it was after ten in the morning.  I
checked to make sure that I had set it for six-thirty, which I had, and
finally came to the conclusion that the alarm must not have gone off.

     "Damn thing," I said to the empty room.  I pulled my legs around on
the bed so that I was sitting on the edge and tried to gather myself to
face the day.

     Standing up, I looked back down at the bed.  "I suppose I should make
it," I muttered.  During the night I had managed to kick the covers down to
the foot of the bed.  Leaning down, I grabbed the sheets and threw them
back up.  They came to rest in a series of bumps and wrinkles.  My mother
would have fainted had she seen it, but I quickly decided that it was as
good as I was doing until I had some caffiene in my system.

     Making my way to the kitchen, I found a note taped to the coffee pot.
'At least she knows me well enough to know where I'd find the note,' I
thought to myself with a laugh as I unfolded the piece of paper.

     Nate,

     I heard you come in last night, and knew you'd be tired this morning.
I figured that you would want to tell me about last night, so I checked
your alarm and turned it off so you could get some sleep.  Meet me at noon
at that little chinese place on Ashburton. I'm taking a long lunch so we'll
have lots of time to talk.  So suck back a coffee and get your ass in gear!

     Love,
     Andrea

     PS: Nice boxers!


     I looked down at myself and blushed, then turned the coffee maker on.
I walked back to my room and headed for my closet, pulling some khakis and
a white t-shirt out and throwing them on the bed.

     Shortly, I heard a ding from the kitchen and made a bee-line for the
mugs.  With my first cup of the morning, I made my way into the bathroom to
shave.  Setting the cup down on the vanity, I grabbed a towel and started
the water running.

     I looked momentarily at my toothbrush, even made as if to grab it, but
quickly vetoed the idea.  Coffee and toothpaste definitely don't mix well.
It's not as bad as orange juice and toothpaste, but it's definitely not
good.  Instead, I took my razor from the medicine cabinet and got down to
business.

     The mug was empty by the time I had finished shaving, and I decided I
was awake enough that I wasn't going to fall asleep in the shower.  Turning
the water on, I got a new towel and placed it beside the sink.

     The shower did the job of waking me up the rest of the way, and by the
time I was finished, I felt up to facing the world.  I wrapped the towel
around my waist and left the warmth of the bathroom.

     I got some clean boxers from my dresser and then threw on the khakis
and t-shirt.  Looking down at the bed, I decided that it looked alright
after all.  'Besides,' I thought to myself.  'I'm just going to get back
into it tonight.'  Being the wizard of self-persuasion that I am, I quickly
convinced myself that it would only be a waste of valuable energy to make a
bed I was only going to unmake in a matter of hours.  Smiling to myself, I
turned my back on the bed.

     I moved to the mirror and fiddled with my hair until I was satisfied,
then grabbed my wallet off of the bedside table.  Walking into the living
room, I noticed the time.  I still had lots of time before I had to meet
Andrea, but didn't really feel like waiting around the house.

     Instead, I decided that I would pick her up at the office.  I hadn't
been there since I got into town, and I was looking forward to seeing
everyone again.  I took my keys down off of the hook by the door and left
the house.

     The drive over to the office wasn't long, and there was little
traffic.  I got to the building and parked in the underground lot, then
took the elevator up to the office.  The doors opened on a quiet, very
conservative looking reception area.  I entered and walked to the counter,
noticing that Stacey was busy at her computer.

     "Excuse me, miss," I said in a professional tone.  "I was wondering if
you could help me?"

     "One moment, sir," Stacey responded without looking up.  She made a
couple of changes to whatever it was she was working on, then finally
smiled, apparently satisfied with it for the moment.  She still didn't look
around to me, though.  "Okay, what is it you needed help with?"

     "Well, I was wondering what someone has to do to get a hug around
here?"  I responded, trying to keep the smile that was on my face out of my
voice.

     "A hug?" she asked, looking up with uncertainty.  When she saw my
face, the uncertainty was replaced with a grin.  "Nate!" she yelled,
jumping up out of her seat.  She dashed around the side of the reception
desk and practically bowled me over as she pulled me into a hug.

     I hugged her back and told her it was good to see her.

     "You too!" she laughed, finally releasing me.  "I haven't seen you in
forever!"

     Stacey had been working at the office for several years, and since
Andrea worked here and her father was a partner, I had spent a lot of time
bumming around the halls before I moved back to Canada.

     "I know, I know.  I've been meaning to come in and see everyone, but
things have been a little hectic this week," I laughed.  "Is Andrea still
here?"

     "Yep, she's in her office.  Mr. Cameron is out, though," she replied
with a smile.  "You can go right on back, if you want."

     I thanked her and started toward the doors that would lead me
eventually to Andrea's office.  I had almost reached them when Stacey
called my name.

     "Yeah?" I asked, turning to face her again.

     "The next time you're going to have Rosie O'Donnell call me, you wanna
give me a little bit of notice?"

     I laughed.  "Hey, I didn't know she was going to do that!  I only
asked her to call Andrea and embarrass her.  Calling back was her idea," I
said with a smile.

     Stacey gave me a grin and sat back down behind her desk.  I pushed
open the doors and walked into the interior office.  I turned and began to
make my way to Andrea's office, pausing to say hello to a few of the people
that I hadn't seen in a while.  Everyone seemed happy to see me, and they
all congratulated me on the Rosie/Andrea thing.  I laughed along with them,
then excused myself.

     Andrea was on the phone when I let myself into her office.  She seemed
surprised to see me, but gave me a smile. I sat down on the corner of her
desk and began making faces, trying to make her laugh.

     She gave me an evil look, quickly followed by another smile, and
turned away from me, attempting to continue her conversation.  "Yes, that
sounds great, but I'm going to have to get back to you.  Something very
important just landed on my desk, and I have to take care of it," she said,
still avoiding looking at me.

     I grinned to myself as she assured the person on the phone that she
would contact him later in the afternoon, then hung up.

     "You little bugger," she laughed, slapping me in the knee.  "What are
you doing here?  I told you to meet me at the restuarant."

     "I know, but I was ready early, and I realised that I hadn't been to
the office since I got back into town, so I decided to come in and pick you
up instead.  I was hoping to talk to dad too, but he's apparently out of
the office."

     Andrea nodded.  "He had a meeting he had to get to.  He's going to be
at dinner, though."

     I stood up from her desk and offered her my hand.  "Well, my dear,
shall we go?"

     Andrea smiled and grabbed my hand, allowing me to pull her from her
seat.  "By all means," she replied.

     We left her office and walked back out into the reception area.
Before we left, Andrea made sure to tell Stacey that she would be taking a
long lunch.  Stacey nodded her understanding and gave us a smile and a wave
as the elevator doors opened for us.


     Since it was a beautiful day, we decided to walk to the restuarant,
which was only a few blocks away.  Knowing that I was dying to talk about
it, Andrea carefully avoided discussing the date until after we were seated
in the restaurant.

     "Now," she said with a smile, "whatever will we discuss over lunch?"

     I answered her with a shrug.  'Two can play at this game,' I thought
to myself, knowing that Andrea was just as anxious to talk about what had
happened the night before as I was.  "How are things at the office?"  I
asked innocently.

     Andrea's grin widened.  "Okay, okay.  You know I'm dying to know.
What happened?"

     "You don't honestly expect me to kiss and tell, do you?" I asked,
picking up my menu and placing it between us, hiding my smile.

     Andrea ripped the menu out of my hands and smacked me on the forehead
with it.  "If there was kissing, you better be telling, my friend," she
said with a laugh.

     "Oh, there was kissing," I said with a slight smile.

     "Then you'd better commence with the telling," she said.

     Before I could reply, the waitress arrived to take our orders.  Since
I no longer had a menu, Andrea ordered for the both of us.  The waitress
gave us a nod and a small bow before returning to the kitchen with our
order.

     "Now spill," Andrea said, turning her attention back to me.

     "Well, he picked me up in the limo and we went to dinner.  You were so
right about that restaurant too.  It was perfect.  Not too crowded, nice
atmosphere."

     "Told you," she responded, taking a drink of water.  "I found that
place a few months ago and instantly fell in love with it.  Cute waiters
too."

     I laughed and told her about Philip.

     "You're kidding!" she laughed.  "What did Brian do?"

     "Well, he showed me the note, and then I embarrassed the waiter when
he came back to check if we were enjoying our meals," I said, relating what
had happened.

     "That's my boy," Andrea said proudly.

     "Then John, our limo driver, took us to the movies."

     "And? How was the movie."

     I didn't answer her, but felt myself blush.

     Andrea laughed again.  "You didn't see much of the movie, did you?"

     I shook my head and smiled.

     The waitress reappeared with our food, thankfully causing Andrea's
questions to stop for a moment.  As soon as the waitress had left us again,
Andrea leaned across the table.

     "So?  Is he a good kisser?" she whispered with a smile.

     "He's an unbelievable kisser," I confided.  Just the thought of
kissing Brian brought a smile to my face.

     Andrea laughed and started to eat.  "What did you do after the movie?"
she asked after a few moments of silence.

     I finished chewing and swallowed before I answered her.  "We had John
take us back to the hotel and just hung out with the guys for a while."

     "All of the guys?"

     "Well, all but Howie.  They all seem to be optomistic that he'll come
around though."

     Andrea rolled her eyes dramatically.  A devilish grin came on her face
as I took another bite of my lunch.  "Say the word and I'll kick his ass,"
she said.

     This time, after all the close calls, I did choke.  Andrea laughed
until she noticed just how red I was getting, then she started to panic.
One of the waiters passing by noticed what was happening and began pounding
me on the back.  Finally, the piece of chicken that was causing the trouble
dislodged itself and I managed to draw a breath.  I shook the waiter's
hand, thanking him for his help, then turned back to face Andrea.

     I could see how concerned she was, so I took another bite to show her
that I was fine.  "You've got to stop doing that to me, you know." I said
conversationally as I chewed.

     The relief was visible as it spread across her face, and soon her
smile returned.  "Don't talk with your mouth full," she said as she took
another sip of her water.

     I laughed and we ate for a little while without talking.  Finally,
Andrea spoke up again.  "So the date went well, then?"

     I nodded and continued eating.

     "So did you two talk about what you're going to do after he has to
leave?"

     I nodded and continued eating.

     "And?"

     I shrugged and continued eating, trying very hard not to laugh.

     Andrea leaned in over the table.  "Nathaniel James Healy, if you don't
start giving me details, it won't be a little piece of chicken that kills
you."

     I couldn't keep it up.  I had to laugh.  "Fine, fine," I said.  "We
talked about it.  We both realised that we wanted to try a relationship,
regardless of how hard it was going to be."

     "What about all the time you'll have to spend away from each other?"
she asked, sitting back in her seat.

     "Well, we'll deal with it.  Like you said before, we wouldn't be the
first people to have a long distance relationship."

     "And what are you going to do about the media?  What are they going to
say if the two of you start spending all of your free time together?"

     I shrugged again.  "Brian doesn't seem too worried about it.  He said
that as long as we were careful it shouldn't be too big of a problem.
There's already a ton of rumours about him and the rest of the guys anyway,
a few more won't hurt."

     Andrea nodded and smiled.  "I'm so glad this all worked out.  You
really do make a cute couple."

     "Thanks," I said, taking another bite.  When it was done, I looked
back up at her.  "I really think I'm falling, Andy."

     "So do I, sweetie, so do I," she said, taking my hand.  "You've been
different this week.  Happier, more open than I've seen you in a long time.
You need this."

     I could feel the goofy smile grow on my face, but I seemed powerless
to keep it from happening.  "Thank you," I said, smiling at her.

     "For what?"

     "This," I said, indicating the two of us.  "Everything you do for me,
everything you want for me, everything you are for me.  I don't know what
I'd do without you."  I could feel the tear in the corner of my eye, and I
willed it not to fall.  It didn't listen.

     Apparently Andrea was having the same problem, as there was now a wet
streak running down her right cheek, and it looked like there would soon be
one on the left as well.

     Andrea squeezed my hand, using the other to wipe her eyes.  "You
deserve so much," she said with a smile.

     I squeezed back.  "I already have so much."


     I walked Andrea back to the office, noted that her father still wasn't
back from his meeting, and jumped in the car.  I was almost home when my
cell phone started ringing.  I pulled it out and flipped it open.

     "Hello?"

     "Hey Nate, it's Celia."  Celia was my agent.  She had been after me to
start working on my new book since just after the first one had been
bought.  I had fought tooth and nail with her just to get the few weeks
vacation that were now coming to a close.

     "Celia, I'm still on vacation, you know," I said tiredly, dreading
whatever business she was about to pull me into.

     "I know, I know.  I just wanted to call and tell you that I got a call
from Peter about the new book.  He seems confused."

     "Peter would be confused by a three-year-old," I complained into the
phone.  "All I did was call and run a couple of ideas by him the other day
to kill a little time.  I'm not writing anything yet."

     "Nate, I know.  I told him that you weren't writing yet, but he's in a
tizzy because he thinks you're tampering with the idea or some such
nonsense.  I tried to tell him that it was your idea to tamper with but he
wouldn't listen.  I just thought you might want to give him a call and try
and calm him down."

     "Alright Celia, I'll call him when I get back to the house and see if
I can make things a little simpler for him.  Maybe I should draw him a
picture and fax it," I said sarcastically, already not looking forward to
an afternoon on the phone with Peter.

     "Nate, do you want me to find you a new editor?  With the way 'Blue
Sky' is selling, they'll bend over backward to make you happy, you know."

     I sighed.  I didn't want to get rid of Pete.  He had done a terrific
job with the first book, but he was tedious to work with.  "Ask me again
next week, Celia.  I'll call you early in the week and we'll talk again,
alright?"

     "Okay Nate, enjoy the rest of your vacation."

     "I will Celia, bye," I said as I hung up the phone and sighed again,
wishing I had never bought the damn thing.

     I pulled into the driveway of the condo and turned off the engine.
Getting out of the car, I hit the alarm button on the key chain and
unlocked the front door.  I immediately noticed the flashing light on the
phone indicating that there was a message.

     I reached over and hit the speaker button, then dialed our message
service.  As I punched in the password, I cringed inwardly, waiting to hear
Pete's voice come through the speaker.

     Instead I heard the voice of an angel.  I can now tell you, angels
speak with soft southern accents.

     "Nate," Brian's voice said.  "It's me.  Just wanted to talk for a few
minutes."

     "He misses you!" I could hear Nick yell in the background.

     "Shut up Nick!  Anyway, give me a call when you get in," Brian said,
and I could hear the embarrassment in his voice.

     I saved the message and hung up the phone before hitting the speaker
button again.  I quickly dialed Brian's cell number, and waited as I heard
it ring.

     "Brian's phone," a voice said.  "If you think Brian may be the father
of your baby, please stay on the line and someone will help you.  If you
would like Brian to be the father of your baby, please press '1' now."

     I giggled and pressed '1.'  "Hey AJ, is Brian around?"

     AJ laughed.  "Hey Nate.  Brian's in the studio.  We're done for the
day, but he wanted to finish up a couple of things while we've got it
booked anyway."

     "Oh.  Well, let him know that I called, will you?  I have to give my
editor a call and calm him down a bit, but with a little luck, I shouldn't
be too long."

     "Sure thing Nate.  I'll talk to you later," AJ said.

     "Talk to you later, AJ," I said, hanging up and dialing Pete's office
number.  When the receptionist came on, I gave her the extension number and
waited while we were connected.

     "Peter Renfield," Pete said into the other end of the line.

     "Hey Pete," I said.  "It's Nate Healy.  I just got a call from Celia
and she seemed concerned that you weren't understanding something we talked
about the other day."

     "Oh, yeah Nate.  I'm just not too clear about..."


     I groaned and rubbed my temples.  Fourty-five minutes later, I had
managed to clear up my ideas for Pete, but had proceded to confuse him
again somewhere along the way.  Looking up at the clock, I decided that I
had had enough.  "Pete," I said, interrupting him.  "I'll tell you what.
You just think about the things we talked about, and I will call you first
thing next week and we'll continue this.  I only have a little bit of my
vacation left, and I want to enjoy it."

     "Yeah, alright Nate.  I'll talk to you next week.  It's just that I
don't understand why you would want to..."

     "Pete?  Next week, alright?"

     "Sure Nate.  I'll talk to you then."

     "Right," I said, hanging up the phone and rubbing my temples again.
Celia's offer of a new editor was starting to look very inviting.
     
     The little red light started blinking again.  "Shit!" I said to the
empty room.  Quickly dialing the access number and password again, I knew
it was going to be Brian.

     "I really hate phone tag," he laughed.  "Nate, it's me again.  We're
in the limo on the way to our meetings.  I'll call you later tonight.
Bye."

     I hung up the phone and decided to take a nap.  Talking in circles
with Pete always tired me out.  When I saw my bed, I couldn't help but
smile.  I checked the clock, 3:30.  'See?' I thought absently to myself.
'Five hours later, I'm messing the bed up.'  I lay down and closed my eyes.

     This time, sleep didn't come quite so easily.  Images of Brian kept
flashing into my mind.  As always, it was his eyes that I seemed to settle
on.  Gradually, I drifted off, thinking of the comfort and love that those
eyes could convey.


     PART 21

     I awoke to find Andrea gently tapping me on the end of the nose.  I
smiled up at her and slapped her hand away.

     "What time is it?" I asked, sitting up and stretching.

     "Almost six," she said, sitting beside me.  "I figured you better get
up and get ready for dinner.  We're meeting mom and dad at seven."

     "Right.  Did you just get home?"

     "Yeah.  Long day.  I'm going to get showered and changed," she said as
she stood up and walked toward the door.

     "Alright.  I'll be ready in a few minutes."  I grabbed my robe and
headed for the bathroom.

     Twenty-five minutes later, we were both ready and going out the door.
The drive over was pretty uneventful.  We talked a little more about Brian
and I, and about my afternoon talking to Pete.

     "He is a little thick, isn't he?" Andrea laughed.

     "Yeah," I agreed.  "He's a great guy, but he doesn't seem to get where
I'm going with this book."

     "So, get a new editor."

     "Celia asked me if I wanted her to arrange that.  I'm thinking about
it.  I'm supposed to let her know early next week.  I'm sure she'll be
calling Monday morning wanting to know when I'll have something to show
her."

     We arrived at the restaurant and handed the valet the keys.  The
hostess took our names and seated us directly.  Andrea's parents were
already there, and we had soon ordered our meals.

     "So Nate, what have you been up to this week?" Mom asked, unfolding
her napkin and placing it in her lap.

     "Nothing much really.  I got a little bit of work done, did some
shopping and other running around," I replied.  Andrea coughed and kicked
me under the table.

     "OW!" I said, a little louder than I meant to.  Some of the other
patrons looked my way for a moment before returning to their meals.  I gave
them a wave and a smile, then turned back to Andrea.  "What did you do that
for?"

     "Tell them," she urged with a smile.

     "Tell us what?"  Dad asked, his daughter's smile was mirrored on his
own.  He could tell when Andrea was getting ready to embarrass someone, and
he was happy as long it wasn't him.

     "It's nothing, really," I tried to assure them, already planning
exactly how I was going to kill Andrea when we got home.

     "Nate's in loooooooove!" Andrea crooned, her smile stretching even
further.  She was really enjoying herself.

     "Well well well," mom said, leaning in and resting her elbows on the
table.  "What's his name?"

     "I never said it was love..." I tried, blushing furiously.

     "Oh please Nate," Andrea laughed.  "You're not falling, you've fallen.
Hard.  And you know it."

     "Who's he fallen for?"  Mom inquired again.

     "Andrea, I never said I was in love."

     "Well, are you?"  Andrea smiled back across the table.

     "I don't know.  I think so.  Maybe.  If not, I'm getting there." I
tried to explain, but wasn't exactly sure how I felt myself.

     Mom leaned even further into the table.  "If you don't give me a name
right now, you're both getting a slap," she said with a grin.  Dad laughed
quietly, but he too leaned toward us.

     Andrea and I looked to each other and started to laugh.  Mom smiled
and waited for us to finish.  "It's Brian," I said once I was able to talk
again.

     "Brian who?" she asked, puzzled.

     "Brian Littrell.  The Backstreet Boy," Andrea added.

     "And does he feel the same way?" she asked.

     "I think so," I said, looking from her to Dad.

     He was sitting back in his chair, looking at me strangely.

     "Dad?  What's wrong?"  I asked as he continued to look at me.

     "You know I only want you to be happy, right?" he asked.  I nodded to
let him know that I did.  "Well, I'm concerned about you and this Brian.
After the way he treated you before, are you sure that he's the right one
for you?"

     "I explained that to you Dad," Andrea said.  "It was a
misunderstanding.  Brian was confused about himself.  Nate didn't really
have anything to do with it."

     "I know that," he said, still sitting back in his chair.  "But how do
you know that he's comfortable enough with himself now to handle something
like this?  I just don't want you getting involved with him if it's just
going to hurt you in the end."

     "David," Mom said, turning toward her husband.  "I think Nate's old
enough to decide for himself who he's going to be with."

     "Of course he is.  But it doesn't mean that I can't worry about those
decisions.  I just want to make sure that you know what you're going into,
that's all," he said, turning back to me.

     "Dad, you know I value your opinion.  To be honest, I don't know where
this thing with Brian is going to go.  But we've talked about it, and we
both want to give it a try.  If it doesn't work, I want to at least know
that we tried it.  If it does work, I think I could be happier than I ever
dreamed.  All I ask is that you try to understand that, and try not to hold
the way he acted before against him.  You remember how messed up I was when
I started coming out."

     "I remember all too well, son," he said, a sad look momentarily
showing on his face.  "And I know that it must be even harder, if that's
possible, for Brian, being in the public eye.  Regardless of how he
behaved, he seems like a very nice young man.  If you're going to try a
relationship, you'll both have my complete support," he said.  The smile
returned and he leaned in to shake my hand.

     "*Our* complete support," Mom added, giving me a kiss on the cheek,
then rubbing the lipstick mark off.

     Andrea was still smiling.  I knew that I wasn't out of the woods yet.
"So, you want to tell us what happened that night you stayed the night in
Brian's bed?" she asked with a devious glint in her eye.

     Mom choked a little on her water, then cleared her throat and turned
her full attention to me.  Dad's face flushed red in embarrassment.

     I gave Andrea an evil look.  "I told you, he slept in Nick's bed.
Nothing happened."

     "What about your make-out session at the movies?  Any details you'd
like to share?"

     "Andrea!" Mom gasped.

     "You know," I said, returning her devilish smile.  "I'm sure I could
come up with a few embarrassing things that Mom and Dad don't know about
you.  Like that time in university when you stripped down and decided that
you wanted to take a little swim in the fountain in city park?"

     "Andrea!" Mom gasped again.  Dad chuckled and gave me a congratulatory
smile.

     Andrea's face went completely red, but the smile remained.  "Yeah?
Well what about that time you fell head over heels in love with your
Shakespearean Literature professor, and showed up for his class wearing
that..."

     Mom grabbed both of our wrists.  "That's quite enough, you two.
You're my kids and I love you dearly, but I have no desire to know exactly
how stupid you each can be," she laughed.  Dad joined her, and soon we were
all laughing.

     I kicked Andrea lightly under the table, making her jump.  She
returned the kick, which prompted me to slap her knee.  After Mom caught us
and threatened to separate us, we quit.

     The food came, and we spent a few minutes talking about more mundane
things, like how work was going, and what we were going to do on our time
off at Christmas.

     I excused myself to use the washroom, flicking Andrea in the back of
the neck as I went, and when I returned to the table, Mom was talking on
her cell phone.

     'Wait a minute,' I thought.  'Mom doesn't carry a cell phone.'  I took
a closer look and realised that she was talking on *my* cell phone.  I had
left it in my dinner jacket pocket, which was draped over the back of my
chair.

     "Yes Brian, I'll be sure to tell him.  You're welcome sweetie.
Alright, bye," she said, closing the phone and handing it back to me.
"That was Brian," she said with a smile.  "You're supposed to call him when
you get home from dinner."

     I blushed again, and she laughed.  "You know, you're going to have to
stop doing that every time his name is mentioned, or the press will have a
field day with you."

     I nodded with a smile and put the phone back in my pocket.  "I know,
but I can't help it."

     "Told you he was in love," Andrea said, smiling at me.

     I stuck my tongue out at her and made as if to stick her with my fork.

     "Children," Dad said reproachfully, making us all laugh again.

     "I swear, sometimes I'm glad you two didn't know each other when you
*were* children," Mom laughed.  "You're more than a handful now, and you're
both adults."

     "She started it," I whined, sticking my tongue out again with a grin.


     We finished our meal and opted not to have desert.  Dad was tired from
his meetings all day, so he and Mom excused themselves and headed home.

     "Could you have embarrassed me a little more in there?" I snickered as
Andrea and I get into the car.

     "Well," she laughed.  "I'm sure I could have come up with something."

     I couldn't help but laugh along with her.  "Okay, but you have to
promise that you won't pull something like that around Brian.  He doesn't
need to know every stupid thing I've ever done."

     "Okay, I promise.  I'll be on my best behaviour," she said, giving me
the scout's honour salute.
 
     I just shook my head.  "I'll believe it when I see it."


     We arrived home and decided to veg for a little while.  We made some
popcorn and sat in front of the TV for a couple of hours before deciding to
go to bed.

     I had brushed my teeth and was already in bed before I remembered that
I was supposed to call Brian.  Cursing to myself, I reached over and
grabbed the phone and quickly dialed the hotel.

     "Nate?" Brian asked.

     "Yeah.  I'm so sorry I didn't call before now.  I kinda forgot."

     Brian laughed.  "No problem.  I just got back from watching a movie in
Kev's room.  How was dinner?"

     "Fine.  Andrea was in fine form tonight.  She managed to embarrass me
several times over."

     "Sounds like fun," he said.

     "You've gotta love her," I smiled.  "There's definitely no one else
like her.  What did you guys do?"

     "After the meeting, we went to a nice Italian restaurant, then we came
back to the hotel for some R&R. Kev, Nick and I watched a couple of movies,
and AJ and Howie went to hang out around the hotel pool for a while."

     "Cool.  What are you doing right now?"

     "Actually, I had just gotten into bed when you called, so I'm just
laying here with the lights out talking to you," he replied.

     I laughed.  "That's exactly what I'm doing.  I was almost asleep when
I thought of you and remembered that I needed to call."

     "Awww."

     "Cut it out," I said with a smile.  "Where's Nick?"

     "He's still down in Kev's room," Brian replied.  I could hear him
yawning.

     "Do you want me to let you go, Brian?  You sound tired."

     "No no, I'm fine.  It was a long day, that's all," he answered.  "What
did you do all day?"

     "Well, I had lunch with Andrea, and got to see a few people at her
office that I hadn't seen in a long time.  She wanted all the details about
last night.  By the time I got back to the house, I had already talked to
my agent, and she wanted me to call my editor to try and straighten a
couple of things out about the new book.  I talked to him for almost and
hour and we still didn't get much accomplished.  And I managed to miss
three of your calls," I finished.  "I know you guys finished your studio
work, because I talked to AJ, but how did your meeting go?"

     Nothing.

     "Brian?"  I stopped breathing and listened.  I could tell that he was
still there, but his breathing was even and low.  "Didn't think my life was
*that* boring," I chuckled to myself.  "Goodnight, Brian," I whispered and
hung up the phone.

     Dialing another number, I waited as it rang.

     "Hello?"

     "Hi Kevin, it's Nate," I said with a smile.

     "Oh hey Nate.  Brian isn't here. He left a little while ago to go to
bed."

     "I know, I was just talking to him.  Listen, is Nick still there?"

     "Yeah, just a second, I'll let you talk to him," Kevin said.

     "Thanks."  I waited for Nick to get on the line.

     "Nate!  What's going on?"

     "Well, I need you to do me a favour," I said with a little laugh.

     "Sure," he replied.

     "I was just talking to Brian and he fell asleep on the phone.  He must
have been more tired than he thought.  Would you mind checking on him, and
hanging the phone up?  Otherwise that nasty off-the-hook noise will wake
him up again."

     "Awww," Nick laughed.  "Would you like me to tuck him in for you too?"

     "I think hanging up the phone will be quite enough, smart-ass," I
laughed into the phone.

     "Sure.  You coming by tomorrow?"

     "I would imagine I'll be around at some point.  I'm supposed to have
dinner with Brian tomorrow evening."

     "Alright then, I'll talk to you tomorrow,"

     "Thanks Nick.  Goodnight," I said, putting the phone back in it's
cradle and putting my head back down on my pillow.  I was trying not to
think about the next day.  While I was excited about dinner with Brian, it
was also the last day that the Backstreet Boys were going to be in LA.
They flew out on Sunday, and there was no way of telling when I would see
Brian or any of the others again.

     Not only did Sunday mark the end of my time with Brian, but it also
marked the end of my vacation.  Starting Monday, there would be calls and
emails and faxes to be made to both Celia and Pete (if I decided to keep
him) and meetings in New York and Toronto.  Looking back on it, this week
had been almost perfect, and now it was all about to end and I was going to
be thrown back into the lion's den.

     Thinking about all of this, I drifted off to sleep.

To Be Continued...

Okay, that's it for this part.  Please let me know what you think.
Everyone's opinion is welcome and wanted.

Email me at DLS_stories@hotmail.com

Thanks for reading! :)