Date: Fri, 1 Oct 1999 19:00:38 +0800
From: dog <dog@nsync.zzn.com>
Subject: Busta-3

Busta-3
Disclaimer: This is all fiction, not fact. I.e. it has nothing to do
with the real celebrity's life/sexuality/etc.

Warning: this chapter may offend you. If so I apologies for it, for it
was not my aim to do so.

My note:
I would like to take this opportunity to thank my best buddies:
Jonathan [simply words,] and Toni [when you say nothing at all] :) you
guys are the best a friend could ask for, and Toni thank you for the
"emotions" ;).
Jonathon [Brian 7 seas] I hope you're happy and I grief for you lost.
To all of the kind readers that had wrote in:
Rachel [ESCAPES & then make CHOICES] Jason a.k.a. mr.*grin* [the
VAMPIRE killer] Chrissy [you're the best! Thanks for the picks on
Busta. :)]
Bio [thanks for the advice, I did check my spelling now.:)]
Lanzefaz[the one obsessed with Lance. :b]& Alec & Jack & Matt [thanks
for the doggie threat. :)] Trevor [info curious guy :)]
Finally to the guy that made all of this possible.
Everybody, last week we did the clap thing. This week we bow.
THANK YOU David! :)


Ok I did enough blabbering, let's begin

@~}~~ @~}~~ @~}~~ @~}~~ @~}~~ @~}~~ @~}~~ @~}~~ @~}~~ @~}~~

Times were tough for the gang and even I could feel it too. Justin and
Joey could still not look at JC and Lance in the eyes when the couples
were holding hands. They would look away or just stumbled with their
words, but one could see that they are trying hard to accept their
friends. On JC and Lance part, they never hold hands or look at each
other when their friends are around, that was tough for them too.
Because not only do they have to hide from their fans, they have too
had to hide from people whom they call "family".

But it was also at these times when my master's best quality in being
human could be fully presented. He was all jokes and happy about this
whole thing. To him, nothing had change and he constantly tease JC and
Lance in front of the guys, his aim was for them [Justin and Joey] to
accept their friends as who they are.

He faithfully talks to each and every one of them when they get too
emotional or too upset. He would pull Justin for a small talk when
Justin frowns at JC and Lance kissing. [Which, he accidentally saw.]
Master Chris would talk to him seriously about how he had hurt the
couples with his actions then lighten the mood by saying things like,
"Visualize Lance wearing a skirt, that would make all of it look
normal." And Justin laughed at that.

Or he would talk to Joey and drink beer with him. Then say things like,
"Did you think they choose to be so? Have it ever occur to you how much
they need us for support? They are alone in this Joey and they don't need
us to alienate them." And Joey would nod solemnly and promise that he would
try harder to accept them.

And me, I did what I do best, to be available every time anybody needs a
somebody to talk to and not back at them. [Sigh] It was a tiring job, but
it was through letting them talk that I realized a couple of stuff about
humans. I learn about discrimination and how it was conditioned to human by
the humanoid society.

@~~}~~~

I learn this first from Joey, in a weird situation. I was eating [I
can't remember when I'm not eating or sleeping] and he just pop in and
started talking.

"This is crazy, I never thought I would be the ones to...to look
differently at my friends, like...like they're weird or something." He
looked so stressed out when he said those words; it's like he didn't
want to say it, yet that's what he was feeling.

[Sigh] I painfully let go of my dog bowl and trotter over to his lap.
"Ok I'm listening." I barked, as I recognize his need to talk.

"I don't know what else to do Busta, I mean they are my best friend....How
could I think that way." he sighed as he place his hand on my head and
began stroking me as if he could somehow stroke an answer from me.

"You're still not talking," I barked.

"I was taught that only man kisses women.Heck I watch Cartoons on Man
kissing Women.it's, it's so unnatural to see my friends.date." He
frowns and you can see the disgusted look he has on his face.

"What's so unnatural about love? And besides, Tinky Winky wears a
purple costume and carries a red bag on Teletubbies, and that's very
gay to me." I barked and look disgustingly back to him.

"I mean it's ok if it was others, I don't know, I guess I don't care
about them. But these guys are my friends, my brothers and...and
they're...they're..."

"IN LOVE," I barked loudly in anger, to his in ability to be logical,
then wonder why do I even bother about it. [Sigh]

"...In love..." He whispered then you can see his whole face just sorts of
lit up for awhile, as if he had found an answer then fall back again, as if
he found the answer confusing or unsatisfactory.

"Yeah, there you go. It's called in love, nothing more, nothing less.
Just love." I barked and trotted back to my bowl, leaving him with his
brain.

@~~}~~~

The next conversation I had about "conditioning" was with Lance. Oh and I
was eating, if anyone wishes to know. :b

"You know what the bible say Busta?" he asks as he shook the doggie
threat in my bowl.

"The bible say that milk goes very well with doggie threat," I barked
back excitedly.

He took the milk out and started pouring it in my bowl and then started
quoting:
      "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is an
Abomination."
     "Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor
adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the
covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, shall inherit the
kingdom of God."

"The bible say that you're putting too much milk in my bowl," I say
irritated and quickly lap up the excess milk before it my biscuit got
soggy.

"But I'm in love with a man...and that makes me a homosexual...that mean's
I will be denied of entrance to the kingdom of God." he said and his eyes
sort of space out when he say this.

"We've got different Bible, man." I barked.

"It means I'll go to hell for god did not create man to be homosexual." he
whispered as if to himself.

"Why would god create you to go to hell?" I barked in between the
mouth-full of soggy biscuits.

"I'm a Christian, Busta." He declared and then sighed at that thought, "A
devoted one too.. I know the penalty for all this for I was taught about it
since I was young.." Then his face got all sad and lost for a while, "I
just hope that if there is punishment, let me bear it all and leave Josh
be." and you can see his face sort of turn from glassy look to content
look.

"We are definitely using a different bible here. Mine is about love written
by God and yours is about how humans should act written by I'mapieceofshit
a.k.a. bigot or just some population control group. The book was written in
the olden days when there was a lack of humanoid running around in the
world, thus it included no Homosexual relationships etc. but now, it's
different. Time has change and I'm right! Besides, Jesus never said those
words, Paul did." I barked looking extremely pleased with my intelligent
level.

"Would you pray that my wish would come true?'

"I will pray and hope that you end these stupid thoughts. I think it's
very tiring for god to explain over and over again that he created all
for love and that his love is unconditional. I.E. it goes beyond the
book." I signed and tried to reason with him once more.

"More milk?" the silly Blondie ask as he shakes the milk carton.

"Why do I even bother talking to you?" I barked and continued eating my
soggy biscuit.

@~}~~

"When I was in High school, I remembered a boy named Alvin." Said JC as he
plop into a chair near me.

"Here we go again." [Sigh] I let go of my toy and jump to sit on his
lap.

"He was a very nice person, very helpful...he even helped me in my math
when I was this close to failing it." JC talked to himself in a daze tone
that I really wonder should I be here.


"Ok good guy, blah blah blah. Get to the point or I'll ignore you." I
barked.

"Then one of the popular guy in school decided that Alvin was a
freak...words spread fast and instinctively people avoided him. Some
even beat him up." He said as he absent-mindedly stroked my head and
seemingly looked ahead, like he's trying to recall something.

"WHAT? WHAT KIND OF WORLD IS THAT?????" I barked loudly in disapproval.

"I was pressurized to avoiding him too or be faced with the label of a
freak too.." He recalled sadly.

"Huh? Now what kind of fucked up logic is that????" I barked and
thought about the actual level of brain capacity in this humanoid
brain.

"You see Busta, the society doesn't allow people to become more than
rats. We have to move/think/feel/act the same way or be ostracized, labeled
as freaks/weirdo and any other adjectives you can use for different in a
bad way." He said as his shoulder shrug as if this whole passage was not
important or a simply fact.

"How about unique?" I barked in a sarcastic manner, being highly pissed off
with the logic he presented.

"The difference between the crazy man and the sane one is that one belongs
to the majority and the other belongs to the minority. And Lance and me are
currently in the minority section.so we're crazy.." He said as he trails
off.

"Em...you're blabbering., I don't think you're crazy unless you
consider love as crazy. So if love is crazy and God is love, then you
have just succeeded in saying that God is crazy.. Anyway.why are you
telling me all this???" I barked and silence envelope us for a few
minutes before he started laughing.

"That's it, he flipped." I thought and quickly got out off his lap.

"I'm sorry, I was thinking of why the fuck am I saying all this to
you." He laughed as he clutched on his stomach.

"Precisely why are you telling me this?" I looked at him weirdly.

"Never mind, I just needed to get this out of my system. I needed to tell
someone that the world is against us. Anyway, thanks for listening. How
about I make it up to you by getting you a nice big fat Chicken drumstick
as compensation?"

"YOU ARE A SAINT. YOU ARE GOD. I AM UNWORTHY OF YOU." I barked and jump up
and down while he laugh at my actions.

@~}~~~

Scrub scrub scrub. My face is frowning as Chris scrubs me. I hate bath
time.

"BUSTA!" he shouted and lifted me up to his face-level

"YES SIR YES!" I barked in surprise. :O

"Your not a crank are you?????" he look at me suspiciously and
menacingly.

"Huh? Em no sir I'm not." I barked and squirmed on his hold at the same
time. I was hoping that he would for once understand because he looked so
fierce now.

"You better not be a bigot or I'll have to kill you. hahahahaha." His
face turned back to the joker one, which I'm so accustom to.

[Sigh] :['"Master Chris is in his mood's again.' I thought, he seems to
have a fond habit of suddenly surprising people by being serious or
something.

"The truth is..." he lowered me back to the sink as I grumbled about
the soap which he didn't understand.

"The government is already against them...I mean, they didn't even put
up the federal hate crime legislation in all the states, i.e. in some
states, gays are not protected against gay bashing."

"Stupid soap." :[

"I mean there is still some places where gay couples cannot get
married."

"Soap and water in my nice dry fur.I hate soap." :[

"This means that all the is a conspiracy to create fear and division
among the people, they trying to create the culture of hate."

"The water is cold." :[

"[SIGH.] I'm so sick and tired of all this sexual witch-hunting, I mean
these people are not any lesser than me or you. Their humans and they
deserve protection from hate."

"You rub the back of my ear for too long." :[

"I don't know what I can do Busta, but the least I could do is to be behind
JC and Lance all through their journey. And I'll be damn if anyone's gonna
think that I would stay down when they abuse my friend.  I'll kill them
before they get near Lance or JC."

"My paws are wrinkled." :[

"ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME???" he shouted and swung me back to eye level.

"Huh? What? Yes of course I listen to you. Who else would I listen to?
You are the master and I am but your humble slave." I barked inconsistently. :{

"Hahahahaha. Scared you. Hahahahahahaha." He laughed and all the soap
 from me flew all over the place.

I rolled my eyes and stared at him squarely.

"Ok, ok. I'll wash you off now and towel you up."

"Yes master that would be nice."

`````````````````````````````

Now if your wondering about my talk with Justin, then don't I don't talk to
him, he don't talk to me. We don't talk to each other. But I do notice his
movement.

He was...quiet...very thoughtful. He normally doesn't have that look unless
he had just finish visiting the hospital or something.  Sometimes in the
middle of the night he would just sit alone and just look at a glass of
water and stare at it for a very very long time. And if I had nothing
better to do at that time, I would look at him.

Sometimes you notice that his eyes seem to become glassy-looking. Then
a teardrop falls. And then all of the sudden he gets a very angry look
and just storm off...I don't know, I think he's weird.

Sufficient to say that life goes on with everybody even if it still
feels weird.

[YAWN] that's it, I'll keep you inform on the boy's activities some
other time. I'm going to Zzzz just going to Zzzzz Slee [Yawn]
Zzzzzzzzzzzzz..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
That's all for now.
I have plans for some more dramatic stuff. Will be out soon.
Please kindly send all comments to dog@nsync.zzn.com.
And once again, I apologies to anyone who finds this segment offending
or stupid. I wrote it because.well because I wanted to. Sorry. :b
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


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It is better to be hated for what you are
than to be loved for what you are not.
--DLS author of Brian and me. :)
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 BE NSYNC