Date: Sun, 21 Apr 2002 18:41:34 +0000
From: Chained Soul <expression_of_truth@hotmail.com>
Subject: 'Can't Run Away' chapter 5

Disclaimer: This story is not true. I do not know the
guys from *NSYNC. This did NOT happen. Got that? And this
story can be a little dark. I am warning you. If you like happy
endings and no tears, then this story isn't for you. Under 18
years old? Don't read this. If you do, don't blame me for any
trouble u run into. Homophobic? LEAVE. This isn't for you.
What are u even doing at Nifty???
	It's been ages since I've posted anything. I'm not going to make
excuses.  I simply got tired of the story. But I've started writing again,
thinking maybe I can take this story somewhere. That maybe the plot is good
enough to warrant more than a half assed attempt. My email address has
changed. It is now Expression_of_Truth@hotmail.com Feel free to email me
with suggestions, comments, flames, etc.
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~*~ Justin ~*~

	I hated to watch all this. Lance and Chris were just trying to hold
it all together but Joey's newest habit was straining us all. JC looked
worse everyday.  Joey's reclusive side was rubbing off on JC and slowly, we
were losing them both.  At times, I was angry at Joe. I mean, this was his
fault. Sure, he'd been hurt before but I'd had enough of his feeling sorry
for himself. I knew he wasn't blind; he saw what it was doing to us all. If
only one of us could talk him past his fears.
	But he wouldn't let us in. Not even me. He used to tell me
everything.  Not that he needed to say a word. At times, I thought my gifts
a curse. It wasn't always a good thing to be able to feel what others felt,
or to hold the ability to read anyone like an open book. I'd always been
this way. For as long as I can remember, I'd always felt somewhat
alien. I'd never met anyone who could do these things that come so
naturally to me. I'd taught myself at a young age to read people.  Now, I
could read feelings and even thoughts if I tried. At times, when the
feelings were intense, I didn't even need to try. I felt the pain or
happiness of others even when I didn't want to.
	My gifts had become a bit too much for me as a teenager and I'd
tried to turn them off. I found myself feeling naked and alone without my
talents.  Now, I could almost do anything with my mind. If I concentrated,
I could move things.  Little things, mostly, but I was still working on
perfecting my skill. All it took, usually, was a thought and I could make
anyone smile, even through tears.  Why the fates had graced me with such
abnormalities, I doubt I'll ever know.
	But, as I said, at times, my gifts became a curse...
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~*~ JC ~*~

	"Go away!" I screamed through the door. You'd think the guys would
learn to respect a locked door.
	"Josh, let me in." A quiet voice responded. Joe. This I hadn't
expected. I was at the door before I even realized I'd moved. I guess the
shock hit me a bit hard.  But I shouldn't have moved so fast and when I
opened the door, I had to brace myself against the door frame to keep from
falling. Ok, so maybe going without food for four days hadn't been too
smart. I should have made myself eat. But I guess my mood lately had stolen
my appetite.
	"I'm sick of this, Josh. We need to talk this through. I can't deal
with it anymore." Sighing lightly, I let him in. He was right, I guess. I
should let him say what he felt needed to be said and be done with it.
	"So then, talk." I commanded him. He looked hesitant but finally
spoke up and came clean about something the others had tried so many times
to tell me.
	"Look, Jace. The reason I've been avoiding you, well, everyone
actually is kind of hard to explain. I mean, I don't know if you even want
to hear this." I made a move to say something but he put his hand over my
mouth, effectively shutting me up. "I love you. But I'm scared as hell. You
may think that I'm being selfish, but I don't want to get hurt. And with
all you are to me, you could do more than just hurt me, JC.  You could damn
well kill me."
	I sat back, shocked for the second time that night. What the hell
was I supposed to say to that? I guess the stress, lack of food in my
system, and shock were too much for me because no sooner had I stood up to
get a drink, then I found myself falling. I almost hoped he wouldn't catch
me. Joey, I could handle. But when his heart made him act the part of a
hero, it was all I could do not to look at him and see what was in his
eyes. It was all I could do not to fall even more in love with him.
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