Date: Tue, 18 Jan 2000 18:09:11 EST
From: That's The Way I Like It <bsb_stories@hotmail.com>
Subject: gay/celebrity/boy-bands/changes "Changes" Chapters 25-26

I would like to take a moment and thank everyone who's written to
me recently and given me feedback about the story.  I REALLY, REALLY
appreciate it!  I'm sorry if I have neglected some characters.  The
story does centre around Brian and Nick, but I hope that I can give
everybody some attention as I go on.

I'd like to follow the tradition and list the Nifty stories that I
recommend to new readers, but honestly, there are too many that
I enjoy and look up to.  A few of my very favourites are "Brian
and Me," "Brian and Justin," "'N Sync, Lance and JC,"
"Separate Lives," "Question of Faith," "Don't Wanna Lose" ... etc!!

Ye Olde Disclaimer:
Please don't read if you are offended by gay sex.  This is a work of
fiction and does not imply anything about the personalities, habits
or sexual orientations of the "real" people used as characters in
the story.

NOTE:  I don't know all that much about 'N Sync so I'm going to
take even greater liberties with their characters.  I hope I don't
make any huge, unforgivable mistakes!

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

After the two shows in Vienna, the Backstreet Boys entourage hopped a
commercial flight to Paris, packed into the first and business class
sections and blocked in by a wall of bodyguards.  They signed a few
autographs for the flight attendants and huddled together for mini
conferences.  Dani and Misha commiserated; they were both in low
spirits.  Clive had taken the two of them aside and reiterated that
they were a couple, and should behave as such.  Dani going out to clubs
without Misha was not going to happen any more.  It wasn't until that
moment that Dani realised this little charade would be a major
compromise of her personal life and could stand in the way of a
relationship with A.J.  "We have nothing to bargain with," Misha
said.  By this point, they were completely entangled in both the
public front and the behind-the-scenes reality of the Backstreet Boys,
and the weight of this had come crashing down on their shoulders.
Things between Misha and Brian had been somewhat tense and Misha wasn't
sure why; he was afraid to ask.  Dani was disappointed because A.J.
was only treating her as a friend.  Hadn't he said on the bus from
Munich that he wanted to start over again?  "He's been really
preoccupied about something," Dani said to Misha, who replied sadly,
"I was about to say the same thing about Brian."

Their schedule only got more hectic when they arrived in the bustling
capital of France.  Television appearances, photo shoots, press
conferences, meetings with fans, and then the concerts themselves,
three nights before a sold-out stadium crowd.  After an open-air
festival near the medieval city of Chartres, the guys would get two
days off.  Brian guessed that Nick would be doing another show and
after a bit of prodding, managed to get the details from Mike, one of
A.J.'s bodyguards, who always seemed to know everything that was going
on.  Brian came back to the room he was sharing with Misha and went
on and on about what this might mean and what was Nick thinking and
why hadn't he told him, while Misha sat staring out the window at the
streets of Paris.  They had one more show to do there, that night, and
their stay in the city had been so crazy that they hadn't even had a
chance to take in any of the sights.  There was an after-party that
night which they couldn't skip, because the guys from 'N Sync were
going to be there to catch up and talk shop, since they would be
doing the festival in Chartres as well.  Misha was tempted to just
leave and go see the city himself.  The Backstreet Boys didn't have
the time to go sight-seeing that day, and they couldn't leave the
hotel without major hassle anyway, since there were fans literally
staked out everywhere.  If I left now, and stayed out until the
show, I could see quite a lot, we're right downtown.  Then, I could
leave after the show and take in the nightlife of Paris.

"Are you even listening to me?"  There was more than a bit of an edge
to Brian's voice, and Misha tried to apologise, but Brian left the
room angry and slammed the door behind him.  Misha lit up a cigarette
and paced around irritably, feeling like a caged animal.  Brian
found Nick in the gym, accompanied by his bodyguard Leo, who also
served as his personal trainer.  Nick, who used to be so skinny, was
big now, with sexy, muscular arms and a tendency to put on weight
easily.  He was very self-conscious about his body and hated having
other people watch him work out.  "Can we talk?" Brian asked.  "I'm
not finished yet," Nick said, "I have to do two more sets of these,
at least, and then I was gonna swim some laps."  "Nick, this is
important.  I have to talk to you, now."  "Fine Brian," Nick said in
a low voice, avoiding eye contact with him the whole time.  "Meet me
in my room in ten minutes."  Brian went out a back way and let himself
into the private floor they had secured for themselves.  He paused to
gaze down into the lobby, standing behind a potted plant so as not to
draw attention to himself.  There were several large groups of fans
down there, and despite the hotel staff's best efforts to keep the
crowds down, there wasn't much they could do about the people who
were actually guests at the same hotel.  Brian hated all the
craziness about being a pop star.  He felt the same inside.  Why
couldn't people treat him like a human being?

Some things didn't change; when Nick let Brian into his hotel room,
it was as messy as ever.  The singer stepped over piles of clothing,
newspapers, a large sketch pad, and some random crap that fans had
tossed onto the stage as he made his way to the couch.  "So you came
to talk to me," Nick said mysteriously.  "You're doing another solo
show," Brian said.  "Why didn't you tell us?"  "You didn't ask," Nick
said in a flip way, sticking his big hand into a little bag of potato
chips.  "Want some?"  "No," Brian frowned.  "Nick, I think you owe the
rest of us the respect of at least telling us when you do these shows."
Nick just munched on his food and they sat in silence for a minute.
"Funny," Nick said finally.  "What?"  "I dunno, Bri, I just thought
maybe you really wanted to talk to me.  You know, about us."  Brian
sighed.  I can't cope with this right now, he thought.  There was
such a surge of conflicting emotions in his heart that he literally
had no idea what words might come out of his mouth next.  "I have to
take a shower and make some phone calls and stuff," Nick was saying.
"So if you don't mind."  Brian stared at Nick, who was sitting like
a little boy, perched on the edge of the couch, his blond hair hanging
in his eyes.  The gulf between them seemed like an ocean, and Brian
was looking at a drifting ship, in the mist, a mirage.  "You don't
fool me," Brian said quietly.  "I'm not trying to fool you, Brian,"
Nick replied, his voice shaking slightly.  "Nick, look at me.  Look
me in the eyes and talk to me."  "Brian, I think you should go."  "You
can't just ignore me forever."  Nick just ran his hands through his
hair, gulping back tears.  They sat in silence until Brian got up
angrily.  "You're being so unfair," Brian said.  "Why do you have to be
like this?  Nick, I still care about you.  Why won't you talk to me?
Is that so much to ask?"  "Get out!" Nick yelled suddenly, "get out of
my room!"  "Fine," Brian choked out.  "Don't try to manipulate me,"
Nick said, "don't play those fucking games with me, Brian."  "Nick, how
can you say that?  I would never do that to you!"  "Get out, I said get
out!"  Nick stood up and shoved Brian hard.  "I hate you sometimes,"
Brian said, tears running down his face.  Nick just sat back down and
put his face in his hands as he started to cry as well.

Brian burst out of Nick's room and ran right into Kevin, who was
coming around the corner.  "Oh, Kev," Brian said, frowning and wiping
his face with his sleeve.  "Where are you headed to?"  Kevin flushed
a bit, feeling suddenly nervous and guilty.  "I was, ah, I was just
going to see if Lorna was in her room..."  His insides clenched with
a severe reality check.  What, Kevin said to himself, you're not going
to tell your cousin that you were going to Nick's room for your daily
fuck session?  But Brian hadn't even picked up on Kevin's stammering
response.  "Look, I need to talk to you," Brian said quietly, and he
took Kevin by the arm and led him a few steps away.  "What is it?  Bri,
are you okay?"  "No.  It's about Nick."  Kevin froze.  "Kev, he's doing
another solo show.  I can't be the one to talk to him about it.  I
can't do it... I..."  Brian started to cry again and Kev found himself
giving his cousin a hug.  "Kev, somebody has to talk to him and it
can't be me.  Please, just do something, anything..."  Brian cried as
he talked, and Kevin had the distinct feeling that the reason that he
was this upset was not because of a stupid solo concert.  "I know you
and Nick haven't been getting along, but I don't know what he's doing,
he won't talk to me anymore, he just lies to me, and he hides stuff
from me, and ..."  "It's okay, cuz.  Just let it out."  "When we
got back together, he was like this too, Kev, he wouldn't ever tell
me what was going on with him, and I didn't want to upset him.
Damnit..."  Brian wiped his face again.  "He just... We just can't
be together, at all."  Brian turned on his heel to walk away.

Kevin knocked on Nick's door, not even sure what he was doing.  He
had been on the edge of the maelstrom of Nick and Brian's relationship
for a long time before getting fully sucked in, and now he felt a
sudden eery calm at its very centre.  Nick let Kevin in and the two
men stood just inside the doorway with their arms around each other,
and Kevin kissed Nick softly on the lips.  Just the touch of his skin
sent a bolt of arousal through Kevin's body.  He felt as though his
sexual need grew every day; he was addicted to Nick.  Kevin looked
Nick in the eyes, brushing his hair gently away from his face.  "You
look so sad," Kevin said.  His low, mellow voice echoed in the big
room.  "I'm sorry," Nick said, wiping away tears, "I know I look
really bad."  "No, you don't," Kevin said, and he hugged Nick tightly.
Nick shook a bit, trying to hold back more emotion, and Kevin walked
him slowly to the bedroom, where they lay down together.  "We're going
to fuck in the bed?" Nick asked, playing with the buttons of Kevin's
shirt.  They made eye contact and Kevin found himself unable to read
Nick's expression at that moment; he appeared to be emotionless.
"We've never fucked in a bed before."  "Your voice is all scratchy,"
Kevin said, "you should keep quiet and rest it for the show."
"Okay," Nick sighed, and his hands found Kevin's belt and zipper,
unfastening them and caressing his muscular body.  They kissed lazily,
savouring the sensation of their tongues playfully battling for
supremacy, and then Nick blew a whispering breath of soft warm air on
Kevin's neck.  "Don't you want me," Nick said quietly, laying back
on his pillow and gazing at Kevin.  "Your face," Kevin said, "you just
look ... I don't know."  Nick gulped as a fresh wave of sadness crashed
over him.  He turned over to lie on his back, resting one hand on his
stomach, and exhaled shakily as fresh tears formed in his eyes.

"Kevin, you know what they say about second chances."  "What's that,"
Kevin said, lying in the same position and staring at the ceiling.
"You're not supposed to get them.  But I did."  Kevin didn't respond,
but Nick just continued anyway.  "In New York, when Brian and me got
back together.  I fucked up so bad but he took me back.  And then I
fucked it up again."  "Nicky, everything changes in life.  You can't
hold on to something from the past."  They both lay there in silence
for a split second, thinking that it was odd that Kevin had called him
Nicky.  "I never deserved to have him anyway," Nick said, "it was too
good to be true, I guess.  I know I have to move on, but I just don't
want to be alone.  I hate being alone more than anything."  "It's hard
not to be alone living this kind of life," Kevin replied sadly.  "Maybe
I'll meet somebody else," Nick said, "somebody really different from
Brian.  I'm pretty young, I mean, I'm only 21."  "I was 21 when I met
you," Kevin said with a little laugh.  "How strange."  "You got to be
a real person until you were 21," Nick said.  "I never had that."

"Sometimes I wonder," Kevin said, "what if that woman I was dancing
with hadn't mentioned the auditions?"

"I don't think I could go out with anybody who wasn't in the business.
It just couldn't work.  They wouldn't understand me... I think they'd
really hate me..."

"I was being paid to dance with old women.  That just seems too
appropriate, doesn't it."

"They'd think I was totally insane."

"Whoring myself out.  What a joke.  How can you fulfill yourself at
the same time?  Damn it, I keep trying.  Musically, personally,
spiritually... Now I sound like Brian."

"I don't think I'm insane.  But there's the performer me and then
there's another me.  And most people don't know that other me.
They wouldn't want to anyway."

"Nick, let's try to catch some Z's before the show.  Your voice
sounds like shit."

Nick turned over to curl up beside Kevin, slipping his hand up
his shirt and resting it on his heart as he lay his head on
Kevin's shoulder.  "Wake me up in a bit," Nick whispered, and he
licked Kevin's ear.  "I think you know how to."

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

"As long as you love me..."  "Bon soir Paris, and until the next time
... au revoir!"  A.J.'s last words hung over the screaming, packed
stadium crowd as the guys ran backstage, dripping with sweat and hyped
up from adrenaline.  "What the hell is that thing?"  Howie was
laughing, asking Brian about an inflatable toy somebody had thrown on
the stage.  "Beats the crap out of me.  Boo, any thoughts?"  Kevin
shook his head, gulping down a glass of water.  "Fuck, I'm nasty,"
Nick said, wiping his long hair back with both hands, "I have to get
in the shower NOW."  "Damn boy, you stink," A.J. agreed, and he picked
up the big toy.  "I think it's some kinda alien.  Nick would know.
Nick, hold up, what's this supposed to be?"  "I don't think he heard
you," Howie said, pulling his shirt off and sniffing himself
discreetly.  "Oh, he heard," Brian said quietly, scowling.  They
headed their separate ways back to the hotel to get changed.

"Danielle, you look ... mahvelous," A.J. smiled as he held an arm
out for her to take.  "You don't look so bad yourself," she smiled
back graciously.  Dani wore a tight-fitting burgundy velvet dress with
mock-medieval arm ties and a square neckline, and had her dark brown
hair swept back with a couple of rhinestone clips.  A.J. was, by
coincidence, wearing a deep purple velvety jacket and a black top with
an interlaced front over shiny silver-lavender pants, all of which
matched her ensemble quite nicely.  "You'll have to tell me which of
those 'N Sync boys to stay away from," Dani said as they entered the
dark banquet hall together.  "Well, J.C. and Joey will probably not
move from the food until it's decimated," A.J. smiled.  "You could
talk to Chris.  He's wacked."  "You guys all get along, though, right?
No big brawls are going to break out?"  "If they do," A.J. said dryly,
"it will probably be just us Backstreet Boys killing each other."
Leighanne came bouncing up.  "Dani, how are you, girl?  Wait 'til you
hear my news!"  They took glasses of champagne from a waiter and began
chatting as A.J. headed over to catch up with J.C. Chasez.  "And who
is this lovely lady?" A.J. asked as he slid in between J.C. and a
brunette.  "Veronique Fourier, meet A.J. McLean."  "My pleasure," A.J.
said as he took the woman's hand in his to kiss it.  She laughed.  "Ah,
Josh, you didn't tell me ze Backstreet Boys are so cute."  She pinched
A.J.'s cheek.  "Si mignon, we say in France."  "They're not *that*
cute," J.C. grinned.  "I'm pretty damn cute," A.J. said with a highly
offended air.  "Leighanne, that's fantastic," Dani said, hugging her
friend tightly.  "I know, I can't wait!  We start shooting in a month,
and I'm going to go down next week and meet the rest of the cast and
start working on lines ... Oh, and hit the gym big time of course!"
"Tanning salon."  "Yep, that too!"  The two of them laughed happily
together and Dani peered over Leighanne's shoulder to check on what
A.J. was up to.  She was hoping to get a chance to talk to him one on
one before he inhaled mass quantities of controlled substances.

"That's going to be a pain in the ass, though," Lance was saying to
Howie as they stood together filling their plates with food from
the buffet.  "It's only two days, less than that with all the
travel," Howie sighed.  "But being away from her is killing me.  I've
been spending too many nights in my room watching European television
shows."  Lance let out a big belly laugh at that idea.  "Oh yeah.
That could convince me to hop a jet too."  He turned around and took
in the room, nibbling on some of the delicacies which he wasn't too
afraid to try.  Chris and Joey were chatting with Brian, who looked
stressed out about something.  Kevin seemed to be running late, as
always.  Justin and Nick were having some kind of intense discussion
by one of the windows, accompanied by Justin's girlfriend Larissa.
"Howie, can I ask you something?"  "Sure, shoot."  Howie popped a
sauteed mushroom creation into his mouth and looked up at the
green-eyed blonde, who pursed his lips as he tried to figure out how
to word his question.  "There's been a lot of rumours about you guys,"
Lance said finally.  "That you're going to split, and that things are
real bad."  "I can't say they've been good," Howie said sadly.  "I
feel pretty trapped right now.  Things are a mess, nobody is in charge,
our management is fucking us over, but what are the alternatives?  I
have financial obligations, I have a family to think about.  Plus, do
we really want to start another bunch of legal battles?  We're supposed
to go into the studio once this European tour is over and record
another album.  And I gotta tell you, right now I don't really see
that happening."  "See, that's why we've never really done the stuff
apart," Lance said.  "Yeah well, you guys haven't been together
since 1993," Howie said with a hint of bitterness.  "We did our time
together, let me tell you.  We had to take a break from each other."
"But you can't make it work as a group anymore."  "I didn't say that,"
Howie said, his voice rising a bit.

"Hey Dani," Brian said, tapping her on the shoulder.  "Have you seen
Misha?"  "Oh, Clive had to talk to him about something," Dani said.
"He's not here yet?"  "No, he's not."  Brian let out a sigh and let
Leighanne fix his collar and tie.  "Come on, Rok," she said, "let's
sit down together and have some food."  "Okay, okay," he smiled,
and he followed the two women over to the banquet table.  Brian took
a seat next to Joey and they slapped each other on the back.  "Gotta
love France," Chris was saying to the general audience.  "The place
I went to eat lunch today was so chic, so avant garde, that the woman
next to me brought her poodle in with her and let the dog crap right
on the floor while we were all eating.  That is France for you." "Oui
oui," A.J. laughed, lifting his glass to Veronique.  J.C. raised an
eyebrow at him and just shook his head.  At the same time, Nick and
Justin stood together gazing out at the lights of Paris.  The slender,
curly-haired man looked elegant and unapproachable that night, while
his waiflike date Larissa wore pale cream, her long spirals of deep
auburn hair trailing down her back.  "I'm going to go sit with the
guys," she said.  "See you later, Just.  Bye Nick."  "Bye," Nick said
distractedly, turning a bit too late to catch her eye.  He wore a
black suit with a grey shirt underneath, setting off his deep blue
eyes.  His long blond hair was loose, a section of it tucked casually
behind one of his ears.  "Where did you meet her?" Nick asked.
"Oh, we met in L.A.  She's an actress."  "Hmm."  "Hey Nick," Justin
said softly, and he moved closer, resting his hand on the small of
Nick's back.  "Yeah?"  "I heard about what happened in New York."
"How did you hear that?"  "I just did."  Nick's eyes swept over
Justin's face before falling, his gaze resting on the floor.  "Well,
it wasn't such a big deal really."  "Well cool," Justin said.  "Glad
to hear it.  Come on, let's go get something to eat."

Misha sat rubbing his temples.  Clive had not been amused to find out
just how involved Misha had been with the gay community in New York
City, and that he had been "out" on a small scale for years now.
"Look, what was I supposed to say?" Misha said.  "If you want me to
pretend to be straight, I can pretend, but I can't take away what I've
already done.  This is ridiculous enough as it is."  "You think it's
ridiculous," Clive said.  "I think your career depends on it.  And
Dani's."  "I realise that," Misha said angrily, "I can read between
the lines.  But do you really think lies on top of lies are really
going to work, or just make things worse when they're found out?"  "I
really don't need any advice from you," Clive said.  "I need you to do
exactly what you are told to do, when you are told to do it.  I don't
want to hear any second guessing, any suggestions, any complaints.
You're deep in this now and I am not letting you take down the
Backstreet Boys or my management company.  Do you understand me?"
"Yes, I understood you the first time you opened your mouth," Misha
said, standing up.  "You don't have to lecture me.  I'm not a child."
He brushed himself off.  "Shall I rejoin my 'wife' at the party now?"
"Do that," Clive said, "and tell Leighanne that I need to see her,
immediately."  Misha walked out of the office and downstairs to a
waiting limo.  He lay his head back on the seat as they sped through
the city he'd barely had a chance to see.  Is this what I walked away
from my family for, Misha thought, is this what I suffered for all
those years of being teased and beaten up and insulted?  To go
wading into the biggest pile of bullshit the world had ever seen?

"You're going to New York?" Dani asked A.J., squinting at him as
they slow danced together.  "I don't want anybody to know," he said.
"You're the only one I'm telling."  He pressed his face against hers,
cheek to cheek, and she could smell the rich arouma of wine on his
breath, feel the cool metal of his earring and the gentle burn of
his facial hair.  "I'm just confused about why," she said.  "Why
don't you come with me," A.J. said softly, "and then you'll find
out.  We'll leave directly from the show in Chartres."  Dani's heart
raced.  All of the depression she'd felt about his seeming lack of
interest in her melted in one glorious blast of warmth.  "Remember,
you can't tell anybody, not even Misha."  "I won't," she sighed,
and held A.J. more tightly as he kissed her neck, sending an aching
heat through her body.  At the same time, Nick caught Brian's eye
at the table and he mouthed, "I'm sorry."  Brian's face broke into
a weary but appreciative smile.  "Come on," he said, "let's go
talk."  The two men got up together and walked into a back room,
closing the door behind them.  Nick sat on an overstuffed sofa
which faced a glass wall, offering a spectacular view of the city
beneath them.  Brian sat down beside him and they gave each other
shy smiles.

Kevin and Lance sat together to go over the plans for the show in
Chartres.  "Well, since we're up right before you," Lance was
saying, "we could do a number together at the end of our set.  Or, we
could come on for one of your encores."  "That would probably make
more sense," Kevin said.  "I mean, we'll have to set up the stage
after you guys are done, and it's a bit weird to come out, do a song,
and then go offstage for another twenty minutes."  "Okay, then let's
plan on that.  Now we just have to decide what song."  Lance grinned
at Kevin, who smirked back at him.  The two had always gotten along
well, since they both liked to take care of business, and Kevin found
himself thinking that Lance was a pretty attractive guy up close.
What, Kevin said to himself, now I'm in the market for another cheap
fling?  He shook his head and told himself that he was being
ridiculous.
Misha came in, looking a bit frantic, and found Leighanne at the table.
"Clive wants to talk to me *now*?" she asked, alarmed.  "Yes, I'm afraid
so."  "What about?"  "He'd better tell you."  "Well, all right,"
Leighanne sighed, "but it better be important, I was enjoying myself
here."  She gathered her things and left.  "Brian's talking to Nick,"
Howie said as Misha sat beside him.  "Oh."  Howie studied Misha's face
and handed him a glass of wine.  "Here, drink this.  They might be a
while."

"I didn't cheat on you," Nick was saying quietly, his head resting on
Brian's chest as he held him in his arms.  "I should have known you
were lying," Brian replied.  "I don't even know why I said that,
Brian."  "It's okay.  It's my fault really.  Maybe I was looking for
an excuse to break up with you."  Brian slid his chin across Nick's
smooth, silky head, and he shut his eyes and enjoyed their familiar
closeness.  "Maybe we weren't meant to be together after all," Nick
said, looking up into Brian's eyes.  Brian looked away; Nick's eyes
were hypnotic to him and he felt himself losing control of his
emotions.  "I don't know, Nicky," Brian said softly, his voice shaking.
"I'm sorry for everything I did," Nick said.  "I wish I turned out
better."  "Don't start talking like that," Brian said, feeling more
secure when his emotional pendulum swung toward anger.  "You know
that makes me mad."  "Well, you fell in love with me once," Nick
said tearfully, "and I changed somehow."  "We both changed, Nicky."
"But why?  I didn't want to change.  I wanted to just be with you."
"Oh, Nick..." Brian sighed, and they held each other closely.  Brian
ruffled Nick's hair gently and they caught each other's eyes, sealing
their fate.  They began to kiss, their lips barely touching, just
brushing, with an almost cruel softness.  Their kisses became more
passionate and their hands swept over each other's bodies, reclaiming
their old territory.  They kissed desperately, wishing the rest of
the world away and out of their lives, trying to recapture something
out of the past.

They broke apart when a loud knocking at the door startled them into
consciousness.  "Hey, what are you guys doing in there?"  It was
Howie, who was well aware of what they were doing in there.  Brian
stalked over to the door and opened it.  "We're talking, D.  Go away."
He slammed the door again and Howie turned to Misha with a shrug.
Misha had seen enough; Brian looked disheveled and his face had been
flushed.  "I'm out of here," he said.  "Sit down, come on," Howie said,
"let them talk it out."  "I don't think they're just talking," Misha
said.  Howie didn't respond.  "Damnit, Nick," Brian said edgily,
lingering near the door.  "What did you do that for?  What were you
thinking?"  "You don't love me any more," Nick said weakly.  "I'm with
Misha now," Brian said in a defensive tone.  "I have feelings for him
and I'm not going to leave him for another chance with you.  It feels
good to be with you, at first, but Nick, we can't be together.  It
won't last and I can't take it any more."  He was speaking loudly,
almost yelling at Nick.  The blonde stood up, his face contorted by
anger and pain.  "Don't blame me for your feelings, for wanting me,"
Nick said, "you should feel guilty, because I know you don't give two
shits about that fuckhead Misha."  "That's not true," Brian said, and
Nick shoved past him and opened the door, so that they both stood in
the open entrance to the main room.  "Oh yeah?" Nick said.  "Would it
bother you if I said I've been sleeping with Kevin?  He's a good fuck...
Better than you."  He practically spat the words in Brian's face, and
everybody in the room froze.  "Kev-" Brian gasped, feeling his knees
go weak with shock.  "Fuck you Brian," Nick said, and he turned as
Howie approached.  "Fuck you too, you asshole," Nick said to Howie,
and he hauled off and punched him in the stomach.  "What the hell!"
Howie cried, clutching his body.  "Bastard," Nick said shakily,
almost collapsing as Lance forcibly held him up, putting an arm
around Nick's shoulders and leading him away.  Kevin stood there
dumbly, helpless.  From across the room, apart from the rest of the
group, A.J. watched the scene sadly.  Chris turned to Joey and J.C.,
who had temporarily stopped eating.  "Nice party," he said.