Date: Thu, 24 May 2001 01:25:25 -0500
From: Angel Lenoir <angel_lenoir@angelfire.com>
Subject: Could it be you? 5

	Hey again guys... It's your favorite little angel come once again
to wow you with his charm, wit, and just general good looks... Okay,
okay... I know it's funny, but you can stop laughing now.  I hope that this
chapter is the one that you all have been waiting for... That's
right.... The MAJOR sex scene.... It's finally going to happen.... I
think.... Oh well... We'll see for sure...

	As always a couple of shout outs:
	Drew: Thanx.  You're awesome man.
	Missy: Babe, I couldn't have done alot of this without you...
	Zak: Hang in there bro... All shall be revealed....
	DDP: Bro, thanks for being there.
	Brad: Once again not sure if you're reading this or not, but
thanks.  I'll always luv
	        ya.
	Lulu: This chapter's for you babe.
	Clive: Come around more often babe! :p

	Now for the disclaimor... This is a complete work of
fiction... While the story does imply that Lance, Justin, and JC are gay, I
do not know there preference in real life.  Many times I have said that
this is a fantasy... Trust me, it still is.  If I'd by some chance of
fortune (or very good luck) I'd gotten to actually meet the boys and find
out otherwise then I'd of told you.  I think... Well I'm pretty
sure... Maybe...


Last time:

	"I think I know what your'e going through," a familiar voice said
from the door beside me.
	"JC, let me explain."
            "No, there's nothing to explain Anthony.  Last night was
wonderful.  It was almost magical, but you know that nothing could happen
between us. I'm always on the move. You're in college. Even if there was
something between us, it would never work out. I'm not going to say that
last night was a mistake, because it wasn't, but what I am going to say is
thank you for a wonderful night."
	With those words, JC walked into the bathroom and within seconds I
could hear the water running in the shower. As I stood there in the doorway
to my room, my whole body was in shock.  Shaking off Justin's hand, I
entered the room and shut and locked the door behind me. As I looked around
the room, my glance kept coming back to the bed. The bed that had seen the
greatest act of commitment between two people. As I lay down on the bed, I
could still smell the scent of JC on it. As the tears came unbidden to my
eyes, the last thought that I remember was wondering could it be you?

Now:

	I don't know how long I actually laid there on that bed.  Time
didn't seem to matter.  It was like time was at a standstill.  The only
thing that did matter was what JC had just said to me.  Through the walls,
I could hear Justin yelling at JC.  Then I could hear JC yelling at Justin.
I knew that they were arguing over what had happened, but I didn't care.  I
was just too hurt by the whole ordeal.  I mean JC had done everything but
put a twenty dollar bill on the nighstand.  Was I really that bad?  Was it
me or was it him?  Was he so drunk last night that he thought I was someone
else?  As the thoughts and others ran through my head, the bands around my
heart seemed to constrict even tighter.  Why was I even feeling this way?
I mean JC was cute, but I wasn't attracted to him, was I?
	As I lay pondering these thoughts, there was a knock on the door.
"Go away," I yelled without even lifting my head from the pillow.
	"Ant, are you okay?" I heard Jon's voice from the other side of the
door.
	"No, I'm not." I said with a sigh as I got off the bed, walked
over, and opened the door.  "Is there anyone else around?" I asked as I did
a quick glance down the hall.
	"No, Erin has them all in the kitchen.  She's making breakfast and
then they're going to be heading back to their hotel so that they can catch
the bus.  Now you want to talk about it?"
	"Yes...No...I don't know," I said as I crawled back onto the bed.
Wrapping my arms around a pillow, I curled up against it.  "What's wrong
with me bro?" I asked as the tears started to trickle down my cheeks.
	"What do you mean?" Jon asked in confusion.
	"Look at me.  Tell me what's wrong with me?  Am I that disturbing?
Too ugly? Not cute enough?  Talk to much?  Don't talk enough?  I mean, why
does everyone have someone but me?  All I want in my life is someone to
spend my life with.  Someone who will share my dreams.  Who will be there
for me no matter what.  Is that too much to ask for?"
	"Whoa man.  Where did this come from?" Jon asked me with concern in
his voice.
	"JC and I slept together last night."
	"Slept together, or SLEPT together," Jon said with an empahsis on
the second slept.
	"Slept, slept together." I said with a sigh.  "And it was
wonderful, but this morning he just seemed to blow it off.  I mean yeah he
said that it was wonderful and all that, but he also said that something
could never work out between us.  Why does it seem that I'm always the one
to get fucked?"
	"I don't know what to tell you bro.  Think of it this way.  In this
world there are the people who get fucked, and then there are the people
who do the fucking.  Sometimes, it's hard to determine where one ends and
the other begins.  The thing is, to find out what you want and be the one
doing the fucking, not the one getting fucked."
	"Oh great, that's just what I need." I said sarcastictly.  "Advice
on life from a four foot furbie that speaks."
	"Well bro, it's true."
	"What do you know?" I spat at him, "Everything that you do, you
turn out to be good at.  You never have to try at anything.  I mean if
there's one word that people use to describe you, it's perfect.  You never
do anything wrong.  You're always right.  You seem to have everything
handed to you on a silver platter.  I mean you even got Erin for Christs
sakes.  What can you tell me about life?  Now get the fuck out of here." I
all but screamed the last bit of it.
	As Jon left the room, all the pent up rage and frustration that had
been building just finally came out.  With a scream of rage, I threw the
pillow across the room.  Throwing on some clothes, I went out into the
hall, slamming the door behind me.  As I stalked through the kitchen, I saw
the guys look from me to Jon to JC.  Ignoring them all, I went out the back
door slamming it behind me also.  As I headed toward the garage, I heard
the door being opened behind me.
	"I don't know who you are, but unless you want your ass kicked then
I suggest you get back into the house and leave me alone," I yelled as I
walked into the garage.  At this point, I could care less if they listened
to me or not.  Walking over to the punching bag hanging there, I just
started lashing out for all I was worth.  As I landed blow after blow on
the thing, every image of the night before came back to me.  These were
followed by the words that had been spoken to me that morning.  Finally
after about 20 minutes of just steady punching, my hands were starting to
get sore.  Realizing that this wasn't working, I went over to the weight
bench.  Putting on my max, I started to just lift.  As my muscles screamed
from the torture that I was putting them through, I kept thinking about
what I had said to Jon.  Finally, what seemed like an unhuman roar came out
of me as I let the weights crash to the floor and slumped down next to them
crying.  Immediately I was surrounded by a pair of arms.  Without looking
up, I latched onto the person and just let the tears flow.
	"Are you okay?" Lance asked as he stroked my hair while I cried
against his shoulder.
	Shaking my head no, I just held on tight and let all the emotions
that I'd been feeling wash away from me.  Finally when I had no more tears
to come, I looked up.  "Not really," I said quietly, "but I'll survive.  I
always do.  How long have you been there?"
	"Long enough to know not to get in your way when you're pissed, but
not long enough to know what I can do to make it better." Lance said with a
sigh.
	"You know what you can do to make it better?" I asked with a hint
of anger in my voice.
	"No, what's that?"
	"You guys can get your shit together, and you can get out of here.
I don't care if I ever see you guys again, but I know that I don't want to
ever see JC inside this house again.  As a matter of fact, I don't want to
see him ever again period."
	"Angel, Anthony, I know that you're hurting right now.  Hell I
would be too from what Justin told me."
	"Oh really, and what did Justin tell you?  That JC used me like a
toy to get off with?  That I an emotional pshyco who couldn't take it?  Or
maybe he told you that he saw some things that he'd like to use later with
the two of you.  Now Lance, please just get the hell out of here." I said
as I pushed him away.
	Seeing the hurt look on his face, I knew that I'd gone too far.  As
the tears came again, I reached out for him, but dropped my hand again.
This was my bed.  I'd made it, and I would lay in it.  Then miracously, I
felt him reach out and hug me again.
	"We'll leave for now Anthony, but don't think that we'll ever
forget you.  And Justin and I will at least be back to visit. Maybe next
time won't be as trying for everyone." Lance said as he got up and left the
garage.
	As he left, I let the tears flow.  Within minutes I heard the back
door opening and closing repeatedly as the guys brought out their stuff.
Standing up I went over to a window and looked out.  As I watched, the guys
loaded up their stuff and started getting in the car.  As I looked on, I
saw Justin start toward the garage.  With a sigh of relief, I noticed Lance
grabbing ahold of him and talking to him.  I could tell from the look on
Justin's face that he was disappointed, but he got into the car.  As I
watched the car drive away I was well aware that this could be the last
time that I'd ever see the guys and for some reason that thought hurt me
more than anything else that had happened.

	That was nine months ago, but I still remember that night like it
was last night. Justin and Lance had stayed in touch.  They were still
together, and you couldn't help but hear the love they had for each other
when they talked to me. Through their help and others, I was finally able
to get back on track with my life. It took me awhile to get over it, but I
finally did.  It helped that I had several things going on at college.  You
see this was my last year there, and I was going to go out with some style.
I'd always been involved on campus, but I became even more so.  I'd always
loved the theatre, so it became one of my ways out.  I actually got to be
pretty good at it.  There was just something about being up on stage that
appealed to me.  It was like I was able to be a totally different person
while I was up onstage.  I mean I know that you're supposed to be, but it
was like I was actually the character.  I landed a couple of lead spots
that year, and thanks to the local paper, some recognition as well.  I'd
had a couple of people talk to me about working for them, but perhaps one
of the greatest honors was being asked to star in a musical at the Perot
Theatre.  At first I thought that they wanted me because of my acting
ability, but it soon became apparent that they had chosen me for my singing
ablility first.  The thing about it was the part was so easy.  It seemed
like the music was just written for me.
	It was three days after the audition, and I'd been called back
along with a couple of other guys.  To say I was nervous was an
understatement.  As we sat there, the director informed us that he had
called us back because we were the best of the group that had auditioned,
but that he needed to hear us sing it once more before he made his
decision. Also, he informed us, the playwright would be there to listen to
us.  It was then that I found out who it was.
	As Dan walked into the room, I knew him immediately.  I hadn't
talked to him since high school, but it was obvious that the guy was making
a name for himself.
	"Dan, Dan Fradey?" I asked in surprise.
	"Anthony? Oh my god! How are you?" he asked as he pulled me into a
hug.
	"Well I've been better, but hey I'll survive.  What about you?"
	"Doing pretty good actually.  This is my second musical, but what
are you doing here?"
	"Well I'm here to audition." I said with a laugh.
	"Really?  Who would have thought that after all these years this is
how we'd meet again?"
	I could tell by the looks that I was getting that the other guys
hated the fact that I knew Dan, but I didn't care. I was just happy to see
what had been one of my best buddies in highschool. After talking to him
for about five minutes, we were interrupted by the director.
	"Excuse me, but if you two are done we have some auditions to
hear."
	As each guy went up on stage, they were given a different part of
the song to sing.  The first guy was good.  The second one sounded like he
had a cold.  The third and fourth ones were okay, but not something that I
would have cast in a musical.  Okay, maybe I'm a bit harsh, but to me you
really want a voice that conveys emotion, and they just didn't have it.
Finally it was my turn.  Ironically the part that I was auditioning for was
about a guy who had just lost his parents and was trying to survive without
them being there.
	As I stood up on the stage, I couldn't help but remember the
experience that I'd had with my parents.  As the anguish that I felt washed
over me I channeled it through to the song.

	I never realized how much you meant to me,
	Never realized what you wanted me to be.
	I know that I'm not what you expected,
	But I've done my best.
	But now you're gone,
	Into that eternal rest.
	And all I have left are the memories of our life together,
	The good, the bad, and all the rest.
	Please watch over me,
	Let me be what you want me to be.

	As I finished up the last part of the song, tears filled the corner
of my eyes.  I knew that Dan had lost his parents when he was young, and
this song had to be a tribute to them.  I just hadn't realized it until
now.  As I brushed the tears from the corner of my eyes, I was surprised to
see Dan with tears in his as well.  I saw him lean over and whisper
something to the director, then they both got up and walk out the room.
Making my way back down to my chair, I looked over at the other guys and
saw the mixed expressions on their face.  Most of them had felt the emotion
that was conveyed, but all of them were jealous that I'd been able to do
it.  Shaking my head to myself, I sat down and waited for the director to
let us go.  Ten minutes passed and finally the director came back into the
room.
	Walking over to us, he thanked us for coming.  "Now I'm sure that
you're all wondering which one of you got the part."
	"Of course," came back five replies.
	"Okay, here it is.  Playing the lead role of Justin Johnson is
Angel Lenoir.  The understudy will be Jon Riddle.  That's all, thanks for
coming."
	With those words he walked out the room.  Immediately the three
that didn't make it gathered up their stuff and left the building.  As I
was gathering up my stuff, I felt a prescence next to me.  Looking up, I
noticed that it was the first guy that had auditioned.
	"Jon, I'm assuming," I said with a smile.
	"Angel," he said with a nod.
	"Call me Ant.  Angel's just my stage name." I said with a laugh as
I looked him over.  He was kind of cute.  He had one of those swimmer
bodies that I've always been attracted to.  Combine that with his green
eyes, and he could easily have passed as gorgeous.
	"And you can call me Aaron. I know the importance of stage names as
well. You were really good.  I understand why they picked you."
	"You weren't that bad yourself," I replied.  "Before we open I bet
you could replace me."
	"No, I don't think so.  It's like you actually felt what the song
was supposed to mean.  Anyways, I'll see you around," he said before
walking out the door.
	As I walked out the door, I felt a hand fall on my shoulder.
	"So what you doing for lunch?" Dan asked.
	"I hadn't really thought about it, why?"
	"Because, I'm buying.  We've got alot of catching up to do," he
said with a smile on his face.
	Growing up I'd always been attracted to Dan.  He was the fitting
image of tall, dark, and handsome.  The most distinguishing feature on him
though were his eyes.  They were hazel normally, but changed colors
depending on the mood that he was in.  Right now those eyes were a piercing
green.  With a smile of my own, I accepted his invitation and fifteen
minutes later we were at El Chico's.  As we ordered our food, I couldn't
help but shake my head at these turn of events.
	"What are you thinking about?" Dan asked noticing the slight smile
on my face.
	"I was just thinking about how things worked out and how much
people change." I said with a smile, "The last time we talked you were
going off to college for agricutural business and now look at you.  You
writing musicals."
	"You're one to talk about changing," Dan said with a laugh, "After
all what happened to this coaching idea of yours?"
	"Well let's just say that that didn't work out the way I wanted it
to." I said shaking my head.
	"Was it your parents," Dan asked quietly.
	"How'd you know?" I asked looking up in surprise.
	"Ant, I've been back home.  I've heard what they say about you."
	"Oh."
	"Don't worry," Dan said as he reached out and lifted my chin up.
"They can never change the fact that you're still their son, whether they
like it or not.  They can't change the fact that you were strong enough to
stand up for something that you believe in.  They might not be willing to
accept it in words, but by actions they have already said that they accept
it.  I mean if they didn't, would they be so upset?"
	"I guess you're right.  I never thought of it that way."
	"I had it easy.  My parents were gone before I was able to admit to
myself that I was gay."
	"What?" I choked out spraying my drink everywhere.
	"Here," Dan said as he handed me a napkin.  "Next time I'll try to
avoid any shocking news while you're drinking." He said with a laugh.  "Oh
and yes, I'm gay."
	"But I don't understand.  Last thing I heard you were getting
engaged to a girl named Erin."
	"Actually that is correct. I am engaged to an Aaron, but I never
said that it was a girl.  Everyone just assumed that it was," he said with
a laugh.  "The people that matter know the truth though."
	"Wow.  So when do I get to meet him?"
	"Anytime now.  He's supposed to meet us for lunch."
	About that time Jon (I'll always think of him as Jon first and
Aaron second) walked into the door of the restuarant.
	"Ah, there he is now." Dan said with a smile as he waved at Jon.
	"You mean that's your Aaron?"
	"Yeah," Dan said with a smile on his face.  "I'd written the part
for him, but that was before I heard you at the audition.  I knew then that
you had to play the part."
	"Wow," was all I could say before Aaron joined us at the table.
	"Aaron, I believe you know Anthony already."
	"I didn't know that he was going to be joining us for lunch," Aaron
said with a slightly disappointed look on his face, "I wanted to be the
only cute guy that you had at your disposal."
	"Don't worry, you'll always be the only cute guy for me," Dan said
looking into Aaron's eyes before kissing him slightly on the lips.
	As I lunch progressed I noticed how much in love these two were.
Finally looking at my watch, I was shocked to see that it was nearly three
o'clock.  "Uh guys, I hate to break this up, but I've got to run.  I'm
supposed to be meeting someone tonight."
	"Okay, Anthony. Be careful and we'll see you tomorrow evening at 6.
That's when rehearsals start."
	"Okay Dan, Aaron. I'll see you guys there."
	Nearly two hours later I was back at my house.  As I walked into
the door, I heard Erin on the phone with someone.
	"No, he's not here. Wait a minute he just walked in."
	"Who is it?" I mouthed at Erin.
	With a shrug of her shoulders, she handed me the phone.
	"Hello?" I said into the phone.
	"Hey Angel," a voice said that was like a voice out of one of my
nightmares.
	"Tony.  How'd you get this number?" I asked in a harsh tone.
	"Oh it wasn't too hard once I found out what I was supposed to be
looking for.  So how's my baby boy been?"
	"How have I been?  How have I been?  How can you ask me that
question?"
	"It's easy.  I'm your father.  I care about you."
	"You're not my father.  You never have been.  You're just some sick
fuck who gets off on causing people pain.  Even when you were married to my
mother, or have you forgotten what happened there?  I haven't."
	"Anthony, Anthony, Anthony, how many times do I have to tell you it
was for your own good? By the way, Tim says hi."
	"Fuck you, you bastard." I said as I slammed the phone down.
Immediately after hanging up I called the phone company.
	"Yes, this is Anthony Bailey, I just had a threatening phone call
could you tell me where it came from?"
	After copying down the number, I got on the internet to track down
the address.  Within ten minutes I had it.  Going back to the phone, I
called the airport.
	"Little Rock Airport, how may I help you."
	"I need to know when your next plane to Indainapolis leaves."
	"Just one minute sir."
	I could here typing over the phone and then the ladies voice came
back on. "We have one leaving tonight at 9.  And there are still seats
available if you'd like one."
	"Yes I would. I don't care what class."
	"Okay sir, cash or credit?"
	"Credit."
	"May I have your card number please?"
	After giving her my number and hanging up I went up to my room and
started packing. I was still in the middle of doing so, when Erin walked
into the room.
	"What are you doing?" she asked.
	"I'm going to Indianapolis." I said in a neutral tone.
	"Why? Isn't this kind of soon?"
	"Yeah it is, but some unfinished business just came up that I have
to take care of."
	"Okay, need any help packing?" Erin asked slowly.
	"No, but thanks for offering.  What you could do for me though is
call Lance and Justin and let them know that I won't be online tonight
unless I get there early enough to get my laptop set up and catch them, but
tell them not to count on it."
	"What do I tell them?"
	"If Justin asks, just tell him that my nightmare has come
back. He'll understand."
	"Okay, anything else?"
	"Yeah, don't tell Jon.  Please?"
	"Why?"
	"Because he'd try to stop me and I have to do this."
	"Okay." Erin said with a worrie tone to her voice.  "Can you tell
me what's going on? It had something to do with that phone call didn't it?"
	"Yeah. That was my biological father."
	"Oh, and you don't like him or something?"
	"Something like that."
	"Then why are you going to find him?"
	"Because him and I nee to have a little talk, and it's long
overdue." I said as I cracked my knuckles.
	Erin left the room at this point, and I could hear her talking to
someone on the phone.  Minutes later she came back into the room.  "You're
staying at the Ramada Inn.  It's just a couple of blocks away from the
airport."
	"Thanks babe," I said as I kissed her on the cheek and headed out
the house.  I was pulling into the airport when I remembered Dan and Aaron.
"Oh shit. I need to call Dan and let him know that I won't be there
tomorrow.  Maybe he can give me the directors number."
	As I dialed Dan's number, I was thankful that I'd had the foresight
to ask for it.  Seconds later a voice answered.
	"Hello?"
	"Aaron? Is Dan there?"
	"Who is this?"
	"Anthony. Look if Dan's not there give him a message for me."
	"Hold on.  Here he is."
	"Hello?"
	"Dan, it's Ant. Listen I won't be at rehearsals tomorrow.
Somethings come up and I'm having to fly to Indianapolis tonight. I won't
be back until late tomorrow evening.  Do you know Mac's number?  I seem to
have lost it somewhere."
	"Uh no I don't, but hold on a min. I'm sure that Aaron has it
somewhere."
	I could here him asking Aaron about it then he came back on the
phone, "Ant, he's looking for it, so what's happening?"
	"Well Dan it's really something personal, but I'll tell you this
much.  It involves my biological father."
	"You mean that bastards still alive?  What does he want now?"
	"I don't know, but whatever it is the answer is no.  And this visit
is going to clear up alot of things."
	"Just go, I'll call Mac for you." Dan said with a slightly worried
tone in his voice, "Are you sure you know what you're doing?"
	"No, but when have I ever?" I asked before hanging up.
	Half an hour later I had boarded my plane and was waiting for take
off.  Watching the attendent go over the emergency procedures, I felt my
eyes start to droop.  It had been a long day and it was only going to get
longer.  After snapping myself in, I let myself drop of to sleep.  I never
felt the lift off or the landing.  The next thing I knew I was being woke
up by a hand on my shoulder and a voice in my ear.
	"Sir, sir, the plane has landed."
	Looking up groggily, I thanked the attendent, grabbed my stuff, and
headed towards the gate.  As I walked through the airport I was thankful
that it was so early in the morning. That meant that I didn't have to deal
with big crowds.  Walking through the doors of the airport, I looked around
for a cab.  As I looked around I noticed a limo and a chauffeur holding up
a sign that said Angel Lenoir.  Walking up to the guy, I was sure that
something was going on.
	"I'm Angel Lenoir, but I didn't order a limo." I said with a slight
tone of surprise in my voice.
	"That's okay, we did," a familiar voice said from the window.
	Looking over at the limo, I was surprised to see both Justin and
Lance staring back at me from the rolled down window.
	"Well are you just going to stand there, or are you going to get
in?"
	As I got into the limo, I looked at the two in confusion.  "What
are you guys doing here?"
	"Well we had a show here tonight." Lance said.
	"Yeah, if someone payed attention to those schedules that we sent
him, then he should have know," Justin echoed.
	"Sorry guys, things have been a bit crazy here lately."
	"So we heard." Justin said quietly, "So what's this I hear about
your father?"
	"He called me earlier tonight.  I'm tired of it, so I tracked him
down.  Him and I are going to have a little father/son talk." I said as
venom crept into my voice.
	"Angel are you sure that you're ready for this?" Justin asked with
concern in his voice.
	"Justin, I can't hide from it all my life.  Hell it helped make me
into the person that I am.  For that I at least should be thankful, but
I'll never be able to forgive him for what he did to me, and what he did to
my sister.  It's time that somebody paid the reckoning, and I'm tired of
being that person."
	"Okay, where to?"
	"What?"
	"We're going with you." Justin said with a firm voice.
	"Yeah, we left you when you needed us once before, we're not going
to do it again." Lance said with just as firm of a tone.
	I looked at them for a minute and then nodded, "Okay.  Here's where
we're going."
	I told the chauffeur the address and 40 minutes later we were
pulling up at the address.  As I looked at the house, I couldn't help but
remember another house alot like this one.  Shaking my head, I forced those
thoughts out of my mind.
	"Stay here.  I have to do this alone." I told Justin and Lance.
	"Are you sure?"
	"Yeah, I'm sure." I said as I got out of the car and headed toward
the door.
	As I stepped up onto the porch, I wondered if I was doing the right
thing, then angrily I shook my head and rang the doorbell.  Minutes later I
heard stumbling and cursing as someone came down the stairs.
	"Who is it?" the voice that I'd wanted to hear asked.
	"Who do you think it is asshole?" I asked.
	With a curse, the door was yanked back and I was confronted by a
mirror image of myself.  People always told me that I looked like my mom
until they saw my biological father.  Then they couldn't get over how much
we looked alike.  As I stared coldly at the man in front of me, I
recognized finally why they said what they did.
	"What are you doing here," he snarled at me.
	"I think it's time that you and I had a little talk." I said with a
cold smile on my face.
	Pushing my way through the door, I left him standing in the
doorway.  Walking into the house I had to cover my nose as the smell of
piss and vomit hit me full force.  Looking around dispassionately, I
noticed that this area of the house was almost bare.
	"I knew that you'd come back to me," Tony croaked with almost joy.
"I knew that my own son couldn't forget his father.  Come here and give
your old man a hug."
	Ignoring him, I started up the stairs.  "Where is he?"
	"Where's who?" Tony asked nervously.
	"Don't play games with me asshole.  Where's Tim?  I know that you
have him.  I was hoping that you'd changed.  I'd prayed that you'd changed,
but you couldn't could you?  Now tell me where the hell he is or so help me
god you won't live to see the light of day tomorrow."
	Something in my attitude or the tone of my voice must have finally
pissed him off because the next thing I knew I was hit from behind.  As I
fell I managed to catch myself on the railing of the stairs.  Pulling
myself back up, I slowly turned to face the man that had haunted my dreams
for years.  As I stared at him something inside of me finally snapped.
With a cry of rage, I threw myself at him.  I could see the shock on his
face as he realized that I was finally going to fight back and then the
look of fear on his face right before my fist connected with his nose.  As
the blood burst from his nose, it was like someone had turned on a hose,
but I was beyond the point of caring.  As I rained blow after blow on the
figure below me, all I could think about was the pain that he had cause me,
the pain that he'd cause my sister, but most of all the pain that he was
causing my half-brother.  From far away I heard a voice hollaring my name,
and then there was somebody trying to pull me off of the sorry excuse for a
human being under me.  Without even looking up I shoved whoever it was from
me.  I heard the splintering of the bannister and then a cry that shook me
to my very core.
	"Tim?" I screamed as I realized what I done.  As I ran over to the
edge, I saw him hanging onto the edge of the stair.  "Here, give me your
hand." I said as I reached down towards him.
	As he grabbed my hands, I slowly started to lift him up.  As I
finally pulled him up and over the stair, I grabbed him and held him tight.
"Are you okay? Are you hurt?" I'd managed to get out before a bellow of
rage interrupted me.  Looking up I saw Tony coming toward us with a gun in
his hand.  As I pulled Tim behind me, I saw the look of rage in Tony's
eyes.
	"Did you really think you could take him away from me?" Tony yelled
at me, "He's all that I have left.  Did you think I'd let him go?  He's all
that I have left, and you'd take it away?  You never understood did you
Anthony?  I did what I had to do to make you strong.  I mean look at you,
did you see the anger?  Did you feel the fury when you were hitting me? I
felt it, and I loved it.  You're more like me than you would care to admit,
but that's going to end now." Tony yelled as he finger tightened on the
trigger.
	As I stood there ready to accept what was happening, I felt a push
from behind me as the gun went off.  As I hit the floor, I turned in shock
to see Tim staring at the hole in his stomach.  With a cry, I raised off
the floor and turned towards Tony.
	"Do you see what you've done?" I screamed, "It wasn't enough for
you to ruin one of your son's lives, instead you had to do it to both of
them." With a yell I charged toward him.  As I was running toward him, I
felt the bullet hit me first and then heard the sound of the gun, but it
didn't seem to faze me.  There was the person who was the cause of the
pain. With a cry of rage I grabbed the gun.  As we wrestled for control, I
heard the gun go off again, and felt Tony crumple against me.
	"Bastard," I screamed with tears running down my eyes.  "Why?" I
said as I turned toward Tim.  I took one step toward him and collapsed on
the stairs.  Pulling myself to him, I noticed he was still alive.  "Hold on
bro. Helps on the way," I said as I pulled him into my arms.  As he wrapped
his arms around me, and held me tightly, I remember Justin and Lance
running in through the door.  The things went hazy, and the next thing I
remember was the glare of the sirens.
	"Gunshot wound to the abdomen, upper arm, and chest area.  We're
going to need the OR immediately," I heard a voice saying as I was wheeled
into the hospital.
	With an effort, I managed to grip the nearest hand on the bed,
"What about Tim?" I whispered, "Is he going to be okay?"
	"He's going to be fine.  Dr. Gonzalez is looking at him right now,
but from what we could tell he's going to be okay."
	"Thanks." I said as I collapsed.
	"I think he's coming around," a voice said from next to me.
	"Justin," I croaked as I opened my eyes to a familiar face.
	"We're here bro." He said as he reached out and stroked my
forehead.
	"Tim?"
	"I'm here also Anthony." his voice said from my right.
	As I looked over at him, I couldn't help but smile.  "How are you
feeling?" I asked as I reached out a hand toward him.
	"About as well as can be expected," he said as he grabbed my hand.
"Tony's dead," he said unexpectedly.
	"They're ruling it as self-defense," Lance said as he walked into
my line of sight.
	"Why'd you do it?" Tim asked as he hugged my hand to him.
	"Why'd I do what?"
	"Why'd you come for me?  If you hadn't have come then you wouldn't
be laying here right now."
	"I had to.  After all you're family, and what's family for?" I
asked as I slid back into the waiting darkness.
	As I woke up again, I heard whispered conversations going on all
around me. As I tried to lift my head to see who was there, agony ripped
through every part of my body and I let out a cry of pain. Immediately the
conversations hushed and I could here people making there way toward me.
	"Ant, how are you feeling?" Justin asked as he grabbed my hand.
	"Does the term Mach truck mean anything?" I whispered with a slight
chuckle that was immediately hushed as another wave of pain went through my
body. "Remind me not to laugh," I gasped out as the pain subsided.
"Where's Tim?" I asked concern filling my voice.
	"Right here," he said from beside me.
	As I turned toward him, I reached out and grabbed his hand.  With a
slight smile, I looked at him for the first time in what seemed to be
years.  As I gazed at him, I could see the bandage that he still had around
his stomach. As I reached out my other hand, I slowly touched the bandage
with tears in my eyes.  "I'm sorry Tim."
	"Sorry for what?" he asked as he looked down at me.
	"I'm sorry for you getting shot. I'm sorry that I shot Tony.  I'm
sorry that I ever let you be there in the first place."
	"Ant, never be sorry.  I make the decisions in my life.  I was the
reason I got shot, not you.  I pushed you out of the way, remember?  I
wanted my life to end.  I wanted away from the pain. Why? Why would he do
something like that?" Tim asked as the tears started to stream down his
cheeks.
	As he said these things, I reached up and grabbed him.  Pulling him
down on me, I ignored the pain that it caused as I hugged him to me. "Tim,
I can't tell you why he did what he did.  The only thing that I can tell
you is that it won't happen again.  You're safe now, and nothing will ever
hurt you again," I said as I stroked his hair.  As he burried his face into
my shoulder and cried silently, I looked over him to notice the all the
guys from NSYNC in the room.  Looking at them, I was amazed at the myriad
of expressions on their faces.  Justin and Lance were both crying silently,
Chris and Joey both had puzzled expressions on their faces, and JC, well
JC's was the most surprising of all.  There were tears in his eyes, but his
face was set like stone.  It was almost like he didn't want me to see him
display any type of emotion.  When Tim had finally cried himself to sleep,
I looked silently at Chris and Joey and nodded my head toward Tim.  With a
nod, they came over, lifted him up, and put him on the bed next to mine.
As they lifted him off of me, I felt the pain course through my body once
more and tried to hold back a cry.  As I stifled the cry that erupted from
me, I could see the concern in Justin and Lances faces as they started
toward the bed. With a shake of my head, I held them back.  With a great
effort, I pulled myself up into a sitting position.  By the time I was
through, I had sweat running down my forehead as I tried to shut the pain
out.
	"So, tell my why you guys are still here?" I said.
	The question must have taken them by surprise because they just
stood there for a minute in total shock.  "What do you mean, why are we
still here?" JC was the one to reply to my surprise, "You come to
Indianapolis, take on your father, nearly get killed, and you ask us why
we're still here?" JC was all but yelling.
	"JC, please try to keep it down. Tim needs to sleep," I hissed at
him as all the anger that I'd felt at him suddenly reared its ugly head,
"Besides why should you care?  It's not like you ever cared about me
before."
	As I said these words it was like someone had hit JC in the
stomach. I saw the air go out of him as he looked at me.  With a shake of
his head, he turned and walked out of the room.
	"Ant, what was that for?" Justin asked as he looked down at me.
	"I don't know Justin. For some reason he just rubbed me the wrong
way. Go look after him for me would ya?" I asked as I looked from Justin
towards the door and back again.
	"Yeah, listen Anthony, he's not such a bad guy once you get to know
him." Justin said as he walked out the door.
	"Tell that to someone who cares," I said with a sigh.
	"You don't mean that," a voice said suddenly.
	"What do you mean I don't mean that," I asked with surprise in my
voice as I turned toward Lance.
	"Just what I said, you don't mean it.  Anthony, remember I was the
one who saw you after you two.  I was the one who was out there in the gym
with you.  If you didn't care to some point then you wouldn't have been in
the shape that you was in."
	"Lance, that was along time ago.  I'm over it."
	"Are you?  Then why do you keep looking toward the door?" Lance
asked as my eyes were once again drawn toward it.
	"Because I'm waiting for Justin to get back.  That's why."
	"Angel, someday you're going to have to wake up," Lance said as he
and the others walked out the door.
	"Well until I do, allow me to dream my own dreams," I said with a
sigh.  As I lay their in the bed I thought back to what Lance had said.



Okay, guys.  That's it.  Chapter 5 is out of the way.  A bit different than
where I thought it was going, but it'll work.  As always any feedback is
welcome.

I can be reached at:

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AIM: angellenoir

IM: angel_lenoir@hotmail.com

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