Date: Tue, 30 May 2000 19:29:29 -0600 (MDT)
From: blackdove <blackdove@terra.com>
Subject: Don't say you love me

"Don't say you love" by Black dove

Note: This work doesn't imply orientation, beliefs or anything about the
real members of the boy bands here mentioned, this story is fictional and
just for fun.

In some parts the story will be in first person, in others in third, this
first one is from Lance's point of view, hope yo enjoy it; I'm a girl , so
if I write anything wrong please let me know.

Comments to blackdove@terra.com

Chapter 1

	Everything was fine, I didn't see it come...I've should know, now I
finished with a broken heart and without two of my best friends.

	JC and I were doing it great, he had confessed that he loved me
just the night after I came out of the hospital, he was so nervous about
the way I was going to react, I always Knew that I loved him too...We told
the guys and they were OK with that, except for Justin...how didn't I see
it before? ... he was kind of distant with the two of us, and he was
sometimes a little rude with me, I thought that maybe the cause of his
behavior was my relationship with JC, they had been friends for years and
of course they were very close too, and suddenly I was stealing JC from him
(not that I meant to of course) but I think that was Justin's point of
view. So what did I do? I told JC what I thought and asked him to spend
more time with Curly...how stupid I was!, but I didn't want to hurt
him. Said and done, everything went back to normal, Justin was being
himself again, Chris and Joey kept doing silly jokes, like always, and I
was feeling more closer to JC...as I never had felt with someone...but
then...

	While we were in LA in a very busy week, our manager gave us the
day off: Joey and Chris stayed in his hotel room watching the t.v: JC told
me that he and Justin were going to shopping, I preferred to stay, shopping
it's not exactly my hobby, so JC kissed me on the lips and he told me that
he was going to be back for dinner, and then we could had some fun.

	I was getting tired of being in the hotel room so I decided to take
a walk, I let Joey and Chris know. I went to a near park, and I sat next to
the lake, it was very solitary and the atmosphere was calm, I was thinking
just how wonderful my life was, I had three friends, that more than friends
were my family, and I had the best lover anyone could ever asked
for...thinking of this I lost the track of time, it was getting late so I
decided to return to the hotel.

	The first room in the hallway was Joey's so I asked him if JC and
Justin had already returned.

"I think they are in Justin's room"...I wish I could change the past.

      I knocked on Justin's door, but there was no answer so I opened it
...what I saw hit me like cold water, there was Justin and JC were laying
on the bed entwined, Justin on his back and JC on the top of him, they were
kissing... I was stunned but I was able to make that my feet moved...I
closed the door, and I listened an "Oh my God!" I think it was JC, but I
didn't stop. I went to my room, and slammed the door on JC's face.

	I sat on the ground, just there, with the image of Justin and JC
playing in my mind over and over again... I didn't cry, I hate crying, I
think it's a sign of weakness besides, but sure I wanted to...JC was
screaming my name, and soon his shout was join by Chris and Joey.  I didn't
want to talk to him, not until I was calm and being myself again, I didn't
want to hit him...or Justin...I didn't want to say something that I can't
get back...like JC.

	I fell asleep on the floor, and the next morning I woke up in my
bed:

"How did I end here "I whispered, I took a look around the room, and on the
other side was Chris with busta in his arms, watching me.

"Wanna talk?"

"About what?" I was being rude but I didn't feel like talking to
anyone,besides, I was sure he already knew everything.

"Well last night we had to go to the reception and to request a key for
your room, because you closed...wait slammed the door on JC's face, then we
enter and I found you like a dead fish lying on the floor, and even when I
tried, and I swear I did, I couldn't woke you up, so you don't have heavy
sleep, and you just don't slammed doors on people's faces, I guess that
pretty much told me that something was wrong" I sighed, even when I want to
I couldn't hide the truth to Chris...but then I heard him...the dagger in
my heart was twisted

"We need to talk" I don't want to talk right now , I need to calm down
myself before "about what hap..." I didn't let him finished, actually I
didn't want to heard him so I got up from the bed and went to the bathroom.

	I took a quick shower, and when I came out he was still there, I
didn't want to look at him to the eyes. I wanted to runaway from there, I
took my jacket, it was raining out there, and I turned to Chris:

"Chris did you have already breakfast?, join me?" He just blinked at me and
then at JC.

"OK" he said, like if he wasn't sure of what exactly was happening.

"Good I'm waiting you outside" But when I moved towards the door Justin
came in.

"We need to talk"

'Again! Don't you understand that I need time, that I'm afraid to talk?!'
In my mind I was screaming, so I decided to leave, but when I was about to
sneak out JC held me by my arm.

"We need to talk" JC said again and for the first time I looked him to the
eyes, those beautiful eyes, I made an effort to released me from his hold
and I dropped my jacket on the couch and sat next to it.

"OK" I said at last, if you're looking for me, you'll find me "You wanna
talk, let's talk"



So? What do you think?. Don't be too hard on me, this is my first story,
and I'm still a beginner, so please let me know what you think, I know it's
short, but the whole story is already short, and I wanted to be sure that
you like it before write more.