Date: Sat, 9 Aug 2003 23:49:01 -0700 (PDT) From: Michael Bryan <mzbryan2003@yahoo.com> Subject: JC and the Actor (Chapter 5) JC and the Actor, Chapter 5, Copyright 2003 ---------- The following story is entirely a work of fiction. It is not meant to imply anything about the sexuality or the personal lives of the members of NSYNC, or any other celebrities mentioned. If you are underage, or if it is illegal to read sexually explicit gay material where you live, don't read this. Thanks to all of you who have written. I enjoy your comments, suggestions and criticisms, and hope that they continue. Email me at mzbryan2003@yahoo.com ---------- Chapter 5 He didn't ask, and I didn't offer, but JC stayed over that night. In my large bed, we cuddled beneath the white sheets. Surprisingly, we also talked for the first time. I asked him about his family and his days in Orlando. He asked me about growing up in New Hampshire and moving to New York for college. As we talked, it dawned on me that up until this point, I really knew nothing about him aside from what I had learned by being an avid fan. He giggled when I told him about screaming my head off and waving wildly at him in Madison Square Garden during the "No Strings Attached" tour. "Come on," I said. "You don't remember me? Section C? Seat 459?" "It's weird to be seen before your seen," he said. Up until this point, I thought that it was the sex that was pushing us together. Our attraction to each other was palpable and there was an urgency and intensity to our sex that I had honestly never felt with anyone. I didn't want to know if he felt the same because I found myself not wanting to know about his prior relationships. But now I was beginning to more clearly see why I was torturing myself about the whole situation. I really liked him. He was quite the strange character, and it was like he had different personalities. There was the shy JC, awkward and muttering, but completely lovable. There was obviously the horny JC, who gave himself over to passion and enjoyed it for all it was worth. There was also the self-assured JC, who knew what he wanted, and seemed pretty confident that he could get it. All of these aspects merged into quite a dynamic person. When we finally fell asleep, my head was on his chest, his arm over mine. I felt content and happy, and I wasn't wondering why. ---------- I had to get up early to go to Liza's funeral. JC had left even earlier because the group had an interview for some radio morning show. Liza had never married and did not have any children, but her parent's were still alive and had organized the funeral. The papers indicated that Liza had been under the care of various therapists throughout her life, and that she had been on various medications. She had apparently been hospitalized last year. I knew that the bad reviews couldn't have been enough to make her not want to live, but a physician was quoted as saying that for people suffering from chronic depression, a particularly upsetting occurrence could serve as a catalyst to send them over the edge. I still wondered if there was something I should have seen in her. All I really knew about her was that she was a bit odd and that I often felt uncomfortable around her. I had known people who suffered from depression, but I didn't see any of their familiar characteristics in Liza. The funeral was obviously a somber occasion. I sat with Maggie and Paul, and we remarked that the entire New York Theater scene had come out for it. It was a funeral fit for a celebrity and I wondered where all these people had been throughout her life. At the gathering afterward, I went over to pay my respects to Liza's parents. They were quite elderly, but they appeared sharp. Liza's mother looked amazingly like her, and I felt myself tearing up a little telling them how sorry I was and what a tragedy this was. They were both very gracious and told me how Liza had mentioned to them on several occasions what a wonderful young actor was. Apparently she really liked me, but I never new it. Afterward, Paul came up to me. "So what do you have planned for our hiatus?" he asked. He seemed annoyed with the whole idea. "I'm not sure really. I have to go out to LA for a couple days, but after that, I don't know." "I just can't believe this," he said. "We were on the verge of such success. Now we're going to be known as the play where the leading lady killed herself." "Um, Paul, maybe you want to easy off on the mimosas?" "This fucking sucks," he shouted, walking away from me. Maggie soon after came up beside me. "What the fuck is his problem?" I asked her. "Paul? Please, he's such a little bitch sometimes. I don't think this is going to hurt the play at all. I mean, the reviews are out, the tickets are sold; so we get an unexpected vacation, what's the big deal?" In a way, I was looking forward to the break. With the play's opening, Mark's leaving me, Liza's suicide, and my new perpetually ambiguous relationship with JC; I was thinking I could use the rest. "So have you seen anymore of JC?" she suddenly asked. "Uh," I laughed, feeling a bit shy. "I saw him before he left this morning for an interview." Her eyes widened and a smile spread across her face. "You slut!" she laughed. "You've been doing it with JC all week?" "We talked too," I replied. "I can't believe this, are you guys like dating now?" "I have no idea." Something in the tone of the way I said this sparked a thought in Maggie. "Wait a minute," she began. "Are you telling me that mister 'oh I can keep it casual' has already retired?" She tilted her head back. "Oh I knew that wasn't you!" "What am I supposed to do?" I asked. "I mean, I hardly know the guy. And I do have to worry that his celebrity status may have something to do with it. And isn't it pretty much a statistical impossibility that I meet my next significant other the day after my last significant other dumps me?" I briefly thought about the fact that Mark had met his next boyfriend while he was dating me, maybe one couldn't plan for these things. "Why are you so worried about how things are going to turn out? Why don't you just let life happen?" "Gee Maggie," I joked. "Maybe with the success of the play, you can get yourself a radio advice show." She didn't look amused. "I don't know. Mark's leaving just really threw me off. It really hurt and it reminded me of all the other times I'd been hurt. I mean, I've never been the one to break up with one of my boyfriends. Don't you think the fact that they all left me says something about me? Don't you think I should figure out what that is?" "No," Maggie answered. "I think people get involved in relationships and when they don't work out it means that they weren't meant for each other. Just because you haven't met the love of your life doesn't mean you should stop looking. Natty, you're smart, gorgeous, ridiculously talented, and on the verge of becoming incredibly successful and famous yourself. Maybe with someone at the level that JC is at, you've finally met your match." I blushed at her sudden burst of compliments and quickly tried to think of something to say. "I know all that," I joked. "But why are we assuming that JC wants a relationship?" I mean, our first encounter wasn't all candles and roses." I thought about that night and wondered if I would ever know that kind of intensity again. "All I know is, the way he was looking at you that night, his eyes were saying more than I want to jump your bones." It was only five days ago that we met, and that realization made me feel silly for thinking something could be developing between us. Still, there was something. It was more than just casual sex. Even the way he followed me around that first night, he was sweet and shy. While he was an extremely willing participant in the passion that quickly developed between us, it was me who instigated it. Maybe he had wanted more from the beginning, but was willing to have me anyway he could. But he was one horny boy. My mind was really starting to go in circles. Someone called to Maggie. "Ugh," she said, rolling her eyes. "I have to go." "Maggie, isn't that..." "Yes, it is. Don't make a big deal out of it." She turned around and waved to the man calling her. "What can I say?" she laughed. "He introduced himself to me at the party on Friday, and he's been following me around ever since." "But you didn't tell me about this." "A lady never tells!" she called walking away. She stopped for a second and turned around. "Just stay open to the possibility Natty!" ---------- When I got back to my apartment, a slim, dark-haired man was sitting on the stoop. "Are you just trying to get the cover of the National Enquirer?" I joked. "Yeah," JC laughed. "Actually, I have nowhere else to go." He gave me a fake frown. "Yes, I can't imagine that someone in your position would have anything else to do." I walked up the stoop. "Do you want to come up?" "Actually," he began. He paused for a moment. "I need shoes." "Shoes?" "Yeah. I've worn all the ones I brought with me." "Say no more." I acted very serious. "I completely understand. Just let me go change real quick." JC noticed my clothes and suddenly seemed to remember where I had been. "Oh, how was it?" he asked. "For a funeral, I guess it was a nice one." "You know, if you just want to hang or be by yourself that's fine with me, seriously." "No, I'm ok, just let me go change." I went upstairs, took off my suit and slipped into more casual attire. Returning to JC, we decided to go over to Soho and check out the shops there. On the way there, JC was stopped quite a few times to sign autographs, and much to his amusement, I was stopped by a couple fans of my own. "Look at you, all famous and everything," he joked, pushing me in the ribs. "What? You think you're the only one who can make them swoon?" I joked. "Nah, I'm quite aware of your allure." He looked away after he said this and I could feel my cheeks reddening. "Well, just wait until Hollywood gets a hold of me," I kidded, trying to make the conversation funny again. We decided to first go to lunch. I took JC to a secluded coffee shop that I hung out at a lot. It had a small loft with seating, and was never particularly crowded. Once we were sitting down, I decided to ask him how much longer he was going to be in New York. He said the group had their album release on Friday, and then they had to head back to LA on Saturday. "Hmm, I'm scheduled to leave on Saturday as well." I said. "Small world," he replied. "Are you going to meet with Larry Ridgecliff?" "Yeah, I promised Allen. But I'm not committing to anything." "'Don't Go Without Me' was a really good movie." "I didn't see it." We went to the Diesel store and both of us ended up buying a couple of pairs of sneakers. Then I showed JC some of the lesser-known boutiques in the area, where he was able to get a few more pairs of pretty wacked-out shoes that at least people wouldn't recognize as being part of some prominent line. The May weather was again surprisingly beautiful and I found myself not wanting it to end. He laughed when I told him that I knew Britney Spears lived somewhere around here, and thought he should be a good friend and go pay her a visit while we were out. "Justin would kill me," he laughed. "Is that the real reason we're not going?" "No, I just know she's in LA shooting a video. Justin and her feel the need to be on opposite coasts at all times." "Those two looked so perfect together," I said. "I know," he said, kind of shrugging. "I know." We stayed out until the early evening, and then I instinctively walked back to my apartment without any objection. When we got inside I dropped my bags, turned around and pushed JC back against the door, pressing my lips against his. He dropped his bags as well and immediately brought his hands to my ass, squeezing my cheeks through my jeans. "You like rough love, don't you Josh?" I joked, continuing to kiss him. "Is there any other kind?" he responded. The boy was quick when he wanted to be. We kissed for quite sometime. It felt sexy, and for some reason it felt like we had all the time in the world. I raised his hands above his head, and entwined my fingers in his, pressing them back against the door. He sighed softly and we continued kissing until I suddenly heard a slight groan come from his stomach. "Uh, are you hungry?" I laughed in-between kisses. "A little," he said. "Do you want to go get something?" "I'd rather eat in." He gave me a sly look and pressed his lips back against mine. "I happen to be a great cook," I said, completely meaning it. I pulled away from him and his face turned into a pout. "I'll run to the store and pick up a few things. Do you want anything in particular?" He said no, seeming surprised that I was actually serious. "Just make yourself comfortable," I said. "Take your shoes off, watch TV, download porn, whatever floats your boat." He seemed to be growing more enthusiastic about the idea about spending an evening at home, so I bid him farewell with a quick kiss and ran to the market. I can't remember enjoying a food shopping experience more. I decided to make a lemon chicken and bought out the necessary items. I also got a bottle of white wine to go with it. I felt a little silly being all excited to make dinner for JC, but I just kept repeating Maggie's words to me: stay open to the possibility. On the way back I passed the video store and noticed the poster for "Don't Go Without Me." I decided to go in and rent it so that I could get some insight into Larry Ridgecliff. "Dinner and a movie," I thought to myself, "it doesn't get any more traditional than this." With a growing excitement, I neared my apartment and once again saw a slim, dark-haired man sitting on the stoop. "Needed some air?" I called, wondering what he was doing. The man stood up and I almost dropped my groceries. It wasn't JC. It was Mark. To be continued