Date: Mon, 9 Aug 1999 11:20:48 EDT
From: Hanhm16@aol.com
Subject: Lances Love part 4

Disclaimer:  If you are not at least 18 or of legal age to
view sexual content please leave now.  If you are offended
by homosexual experiences or acts this story is not for you.
I am not implying that anyone of the group N'SYNC are gay or
Bi sexual.  This is strictly fictional, all of the
characters are also fictional and for the entertainment of
you, the readers.  Let's Get It On.........


Lances Love
  Part 4

    "Chris I had no idea you felt this way." Lance said as
he replaced the look of shock with a more caring reassuring
look.

    "SO you are cool with it then.  It doesn't bother you.
I know you are straight but I had to say that to make myself
feel better."I said still a bit nervous and all in one
breath really fast.

    "Yeah I am cool with it.  I mean that it doesn't bother
me one bit.  We can work it all out I still want your
friendship." I don't know what I want though and what about
JC, Lance thought to himself.

    "I better go and get dressed." I said as I started back
to my room.

    Just as I stepped foot in the bathroom Lance grabbed me
and turned me around.  I looked into those eyes, those eyes
looked way down in my soul to determine if what I said was
true.  I don't know what was going through my head but I
decided to move in to kiss him.  But when I did he moved and
I fell to hit the floor hard.  I got up and ran into my
room.  I was so embarassed it wasn't funny seriously he
didn't laugh either.  I just wish I knew what he was
thinking.

    Damn why did I do that I mean I like him.  I think I
like him.  What is there not to like.  I mean he is so much
fun, doesn't care about me being famous, the other guys like
him, and he's very attractive.  WHAT I did not just think or
have I realized that he is so damn fine.  I am not gay I
mean yes I did worry about him and JC but was it that way.
I mean did I really want them to not do anything and have
that arguement.  I did cry last night.  He just confessed
how he felt.  I tryed to analyze it and then I made him feel
so stupid.  What am I going to do I am just so damn tired of
thinking I should just do.  All this ran though Lances mind
over and over untill he made a decision.

    Lance stood up from his bed and walked into my room.
As he walked in I walked out.  Lance stepped into the door
way to see me enter JC's room.  Lance was once again hurt.
I pushed him away from me and towards JC.  I guess I should
be happy for JC but I'm not.  I guess I am gay.  I mean
there is a posibility.  There isn't anything wrong with it.
It is a perfectly normal thing nowadays.  Management will
not be to happy if I tell them.  I will just have to do
something and soon.

    IN JC'S ROOM:

    "JC, I am so stupid, I confessed everything and made a
fool out of myself.  I mean I can't believe that I just
opened up so much and set myself up for a down fall."  I
said as JC just sat there and listened to what I say,
absorbing every bit of it.

    "Listen I doubt that scoop thinks any different of you
then when you first met him.  He probably didn't even notice
that you made a fool of yourself.  Just let me put it this
way.  Lance has to think everything through before he does
anything.  Just give him some time and he will come back
around to talk to you.  When he does both of you will talk
and everything will be ok." JC said trying to downplay the
whole situation.

    "How can you say everything will be ok.  He hates me I
know it.  He thinks I am a disgusting pervert.  I will leave
ya'll the keys and I will stay with my friend Jamie.  Ya'll
can use the house till your vacation is over.  I will be
fine over there I am welcome there and very comfortable.
Jamie is like a not so older sister.  She cares for me very
much and I love her because she has always been there for
me." I said as I started to walk out of the room to go and
get dressed and pack.

    Before JC could say anything I was out of his room and
into mine.  He quickly ran to Lances room to talk to him.
JC walked in and saw Lance just sitting on his bed with a
spaced out look on his face.  JC stood there just thinking
of what to say due to the fact of what just went on and
everything.  JC was actually starting to think that Lance
just might be gay or at least curious.  He is trying to
piece this whole thing together just as Chris was.

    "Lance, we really need to talk it is very important.
It's about Chris." JC said as he stood next to Lance.

    "Ohh, JC I didn't know you were there.  What about him
did he break a braid." Lance said as he just peered into his
friends eyes.

    "No the other one.  That whole thing between you and
him.  It has got him really going nuts.  He is going to pack
and stay at his friends place for the rest of our vacation.
The whole thing is because of you.  He truely cares about
you and not the N'sync member.  I don't care if you are
straight, gay, bi, or just plain curious.  You need to talk
to him it is so important." JC said as he was trying to keep
Lances attention.

    "Fine I will talk to him.  I don't know why this is so
important.  I am nothing special." Lance said stunned at
JC's bluntness.

    "You maybe nothing special to yourself but to him you
are.  Listen Lance I would love to be with him he is so
great but I can't have everything I want.  Just please go
and talk to him.  Stop him from leaving please.  He has been
so good to us and everything the least you can do is talk to
him." JC pretty much pleaded with Lance at this point.

    With that Lance realized that I didn't want JC that I
didn't go to him for him.  I went to him to talk and nothing
more and it some how made Lance feel better.  He walked in
to my room to see me packing a suitcase.  He just stood
there watching me pack for a minute.

    "Lance hey I didn't realize you were here.  Can I help
you with anything." I said still packing.  I couldn't help
but wonder what he was doing here.

    "Why are you packing.  What's wrong you've already told
me so much you can tell me this.  I am here for you.  I hope
you know that." Lance said.  I couldn't take my eyes off his
they had the whole puppy dog look that just drove me crazy.

    "I am leaving because of you.  I can't stay here after
I made such a fool of myself.  I also can't just stand by
and look at you and realize I can't be around you.  I know
you, I want to spend time with you instead of looking at a
distance like I have been doing for so long now." I said
just mesmorized by his eyes.  Now tears were flowing down
the sides of my face.

    "Listen to me for a second.  I do not hink you are a
fool.  You have made me so happy and you don't even know
that.  I can't tell right now but I think I like you to.  I
am trying to say I like you more than just a friend but it
will take time.  Can you possible stop packing and consider
not leaving.  I want you to stay and spend some time with me
and just hang out and let me figure out my feelings a little
more."  Lance said as he stood and put his arms around me.
I just stood there tears still pouring down my face but they
are tears of happiness now.

    "Are you sure you want me to stay?  I just don't want
to get hurt again by anyone.  Especially you Lance." I said
and started to hug him.  He felt so good in my arms.  This
had to be fate for me and him to meet and come together like
this.

    This is almost perfect Lance thought to himself.  Why
did I hesitate for so long the touch of a man just feels so
right.  Chris seems so much happier now that he knows that I
do care for him and now we can see if it will go anywhere.
I hope it does do somewhere.  All the relationships that I
have had have been so screwed up they wanted to be in the
spotlight not with me that much.  Chris is so different he
wants to be with me and he just wants to be happy and he is
so positive that I am the key to his happiness.  He is the
key to my happiness and I will have to enjoy this as long as
it lasts.  Lance thought to himself still holding me tight.

    Lance pulls away from me and looks in to my eyes like
he did when he grabbed me earlier.  This time he came after
me and I had no intention of moving away from his lips if
that is what he wanted.  Our lips meet and I swear I saw
fireworks.  Now this is the most perfect moment I have ever
had.  I hope that Lance feels the same way about this as I
do.

    "Yo Lance wake up man," Justin said as he walked in and
saw something he never thought he would see.  Justin just
stood in the doorway mouth open and about a foot from the
floor.  Lance jumped when he realized that the door was open
and justin was standing there staring.  Lance was embarrased
anyone could have been able to know this due to the crimson
color of his face.

TBC.......................................

Comments are very welcome good or bad I want to hear from
all of you.  I would like to apoligize about it taking so
long for this chapter to be posted.  I have had work and
other things to postpone the writing process.
Email me at  HanHm16@aol.com

Lee