Date: Wed, 6 Dec 2000 16:53:43 +0000 (GMT)
From: Adam <adam_brittboy@yahoo.co.uk>
Subject: My Love, Always

Authors notes: Hey guys, this is just a test story to
see the general reaction to this kind of story.

The disease mentioned is not based on any real disease
to my knowledge.

Disclaimer: This story is not meant to claim any of
the sexualities of any of the members of NSYNC, i do
not know there preferances and this is just a
FICTIONAL story.

Any feedback please mail, adam_brittboy@yahoo.co.uk

My Love, Always



 "It's no use. He's gone." The Doctor spoke in
defeat. Lance Bass, He'd been fighting the disease
that had infected him for just over a month.

Singer in Nsync, loved by thousands, friends to
many, and lover to Justin Timberlake had died.

A month in which Lance would be taken away from
his friends, and family and from everyone's hearts.

Lance first discovered that he was ill after one
of their shows. He was last to shower this time, so
as the other guys were changing and heading for the
bus, they didn't notice that Lance's ribs were a lot
more visible recently, and that despite his tan,
he was getting considerably paler.

Luckily, his nights with his boyfriend Justin
lately were few and far between, thanks to the
jam-packed schedule the management had set up. When
they got  back to the hotel it was dark and Justin was
too
tired to notice his lovers changes. Even the mornings
were not a problem for Lance as he was always up,
showered and changed before his sweet, prince-charming
awoke.

(A few weeks later)

Lance was not doing good. He still tried to hide
it from the guys, and for the most the guys, been
too-tired didn't notice much except Lance's paler
complexion, which Lance covered up saying the
`lack-of-sleep' over the past few weeks were to
blame.

However Justin was not so easily convinced.
Spending time with his lover, Justin knew Lance was
hiding something. They hadn't had sex in a week, and
then it was just sex. No fun or feelings were in it,
except the tears Justin saw falling down Lance's
face in a steady stream.

(A week earlier, Justin and Lance's room)

" Oh Lance." Justin moaned, more for his own
benefit than Lance's. There was no feeling here, no
passion.

They moved together, almost routinely for several
more minutes, Justin wanting to go faster, but
holding a steady pace.

He struggled to hide his gasp when he saw tears on
Lance's face. These were not tears of happiness,
tears or pleasure, this was...pain?

He could see Lance's face through the dim
moonlight shining through the window. He could see
what
Lance was feeling, and Lance looked back, unable to
hide from the one person who was causing these tears
most of all.

The pain Justin saw was not merely physical, but
mental as well. Lance's thoughts were consumed
with memories of his life. How the band had got
together.

How hard they worked to get where they were, and
how his life with Justin had began, and now, thanks to
his weak body he would cause the end of Nsync.

He looked into Justin's eyes at one point, and
knew Justin could see him through the darkness of the
room. His dream, his Justin he would miss most of
all, and was dying again inside at what would
happen to his sweet love once he was gone.

(Back to Lance's Shower)

"Lance honey...you coming?" Justin's voice broke
through Lance's daydream, and gave him cause to
smile.

"Be right there, Just." Lance yelled back as
calmly as he could whilst feeling the bile and
blood rise in his throat.

//Oh no!// Lance thought. //Not while Justin's
here. Please don't let him see this// He begged to no
one.

But his pleas did nothing as he dived for the
toilet and coughed up blood.

He did this for a few minutes, thankful Justin had
not come in or heard what was happening.

//Probably gone back to the bus// Lance thought in
relief.

Quickly changing Lance exited the bathroom and
into the dressing room where he saw Justin at the door
listening to two girls screaming and shouting at
seeing his boy-friend.

That was the last time Lance stood, or saw his
fans.

Lance collapsed moments after the door Justin was
stood in closed, the loss of blood and the vicious
disease taking every ounce of his remaining, strength.

"Oh Lance, baby. Don't do this. Wake up, please
wake up!" Justin begged, not knowing what to do, he
reached for Lance's mobile still on the side, and
with shakey hands phoned for an ambulance and then
for JC to come back.

The guys were all gathered around Lance and Justin
after only a few seconds, all had tears in their
eyes.

The ambulance took Lance away around ten minutes
later, managing to get a weak pulse and shallow
breathing.

Justin was beside himself with worry.

Only a week before Lance's collapse JC had been
calming Justin down about Lance's loose emotions
during their love making. JC explained to him,
sometimes when under extreme stress emotional
outbursts such as crying or shouting, happen.

Justin let his immediate worries go, trusting JC, but
still kept an eye on Lance, watching his beautiful
lover been taken away a piece at a time.

(The Hospital-several days later)

It was a few days after Lance's rush to the
hospital, and the rest of the guys were asleep in
the waiting room, leaving only Justin with him.

Lance awoke to a cold, white ceiling. Taking a few
moments to focus himself he realised where he was,
and remembered what happened.

Leaning up slightly Lance saw curly hair facing
him. After shuffling slightly the curly hair moved and

was replaced by a loving face, and not just any
face.

"JUSTIN!" Lance, wanted to shout, but his sore,
dry throat only permitted a slight croak.

Justin's face beamed upon seeing his love awake at
last, and then tears fell when he remembered what
the doctor had told him.

--Justin/Doctor Conversation--

"And, I'm afraid Mr Timberlake, that Mr Bass has a
very serious disease that is untreatable at this
late stage."

Upon seeing the guilt building up on
the sweet, young mans face the Doctor rushed to
continue.

"However, finding this disease any earlier would have
been very difficult to treat in any way
at all. A full recovery would have never being
possible."

"T-Thank you, D-D-Doctor." Justin stuttered upon
just hearing the death sentence of his boyfriend.

"I'm terribly sorry, Mr Timberlake. If there's
anything I can do..."

"Give me my boyfriend back!" Justin screamed to an
unseen force, cutting the Doctor off before he
turned and headed back for Lance's room.

--End of Justin/Doctor Conversation--

"This is it, isn't it?" Lance spoke, not asking but
stating what he knew from Justin's face. They could
read each other so well, that sometimes no speaking
was necessary.

"Don't say that! You can still make it!" Justin
yelled, crying.

"Justin, honey." Lance began, stretching his arm out
and gently stroking his sweet boyfriends face.

"Sit down, I have some things I want to tell you."
Lance was beginning to cough, giving evidence his
time remaining was shorter than he thought.

It hurt to talk, it hurt so bad, but Lance only had to
look at Justin's heartbreaking face to see that he
needed to say these things to ease the pain, even if
only slightly, he needed to do it.

"You know I love you, right?" It was an obvious, yes,
answer, but Lance waited to Justin's nod, trying to
get him to focus.

"My life Justin, my life has been the most love-filled
life anyone could ever hope for, and you Justin...oh
my sweet Justin are to thank for that."

Lance paused to take a breath, feeling the pain slowly
going away, telling Lance to hurry.

"You've given me your body, heart and soul, and you
gave it with total trust. I will never forget that
Justin. Not now, nor when I'm watching over you as you
start again."

"No Lance!" Justin argued, though his voice was empty
and void of any strength.

"Shuuuuuush, Justy. You're gonna move on, and the
guys will be their for you." Hurrying now, feeling
his body growing lighter, the weight being lifted.
He gathered all his remaining strength, and pulled

Justin's head down for one last kiss. Soft, moist
lips met. Both men opened their mouths together,
knowing what each liked, and how they responded.

Justin's tongue swam down into Lance's ever-sweet
depths and he tasted everything. Needing to hold
onto a piece of what they had together, a piece of
Lance. He felt the kiss slowly, indicating an end,
and Justin took one final touch of their tongues
before there mouths parted.

Lance had a blissful smile on his face from the kiss.
His green, bloodshot eyes looked up into the glorious
face of his Justin and they shared a moment of
understanding.

"I'll miss you, sweet Angel." Lance said, just louder
than a whisper.

With that, Lance's green pools of light and love took
in what they could of Justin before finally closing.

The understanding which had been there with Justin
only seconds earlier was gone, replaced with a
desperate need to have Lance with him once more.

"Poofu, come on. Wake up." Justin sat by Lance's
bed, gently shaking his lover.

//Lance was always the one awake first. Always the
one to wake him up, must be really tired.// Justin
thought.

"Justin" JC spoke, moving towards his best friend.
He, like Joey, Chris and Lance's parent's who had
not heard of Lance's condition until earlier that
day, due to a trip in the Safari had missed their
son's last hours.

"JC, Lance won't wake up, tell him!" Justin said,
speaking as a child would about a lost pet.

"Justin!" JC repeated, with more force this time.

"Lance is dead!" He shouted, attempting to snap Justin
out of it.

"No, he's..." Justin never finished as he crushed
himself into JC's chest, the tears pouring down his
face.

Whilst the other's In the room quietly wept for the
loss, Justin pulled back from JC and over to where
Lance was.

He leaned in, pressed his lips against Lance's, this
time was the final time. Lance's sweet lips were no
longer sweet, nor moist. They were cool, dry and
bitter. What Lance had inside of him was gone,
taken away by an incurable disease.

But beloved Justin was not gone though. Justin knew
Lance would not lie to him.

Lance was up there now, looking down on him, trusting
him to do what he asked. He would not let Lance down.
He vowed there and then he would honour Lance's final
request.

"Goodbye my love" Justin whispered so no one else
could hear. "You'll always be here." Justin placed
his hand on his heart before moving away. Tearing
his eyes from his gentle love's paling face.

It was time to move on.