Date: Sun, 7 May 2000 21:06:04 -0700 (PDT)
From: Robin <nsajscgirl@yahoo.com>
Subject: Chapter 6, Now or Never, Boy-bands, Celebrity

Now or Never by Robin Smithson

Disclaimer: If you are underage, please go somewhere else.  If you are
committing any crimes by reading this piece of fiction, please go somewhere
else.  Like I just said, this is a work of fiction.  I do not know any of
the members of `N Sync or have any idea of their sexual preferences.

Hey everybody!  Thanks to everyone who has written me with their comments
and suggestions.  Let me know what you think about this chapter!
nsajscgirl@yahoo.com

I know I keep saying that each chapter is gonna be the last of the chapters
I post so quickly, but it's for real this time.  Expect Chapter seven to be
out sometime around next weekend, but I'm not making any promises.  Keep
emailing though!  :)

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Previously on Now or Never:
	Lance returned to the waiting room only to find JC and Justin
talking with a young woman dressed in scrubs.  "... Not out of the clear.
I understand that you would rather keep this matter quiet and I'm going to
provide a private waiting room for your group.  There is one problem,
however.  The drug we found in Mr. Fatone's system is illegal in the United
States and I will be forced to report this to the police.  I will make sure
they understand that you don't want this made public, but I'm afraid I
still have to contact them."  She looked at JC sternly and he nodded his
understanding.  Lance started to speak to ask her to repeat herself when he
caught Justin's eye.  Justin shook his head, indicating that Lance should
remain quiet.  "Okay, then, if you gentlemen will follow me, I'll show you
to your waiting room," she said before turning on her heel and walking out
the door.  JC and Justin followed right behind her leaving Lance and Chris
in the room.  Lance looked at Chris and sighed.  He was still out of it,
staring off into space.  `Maybe once we're in the waiting room we can talk
to Chris without the public's interference,' Lance thought to himself as he
reached down and grabbed Chris's arm gently.  He escorted Chris out of the
room and caught up to his friends.

Now or Never Chapter 6

	Lance quietly steeled himself once the door to their private
waiting room was shut silently behind the young doctor.  He dumped Chris
into one of the available chairs and walked across the room, distancing
himself from the eldest member of the group.  JC had taken a seat while
Justin started pacing the room.  Except for Justin's constant pacing, the
room was silent for several minutes.  Chris, his voice catching the other
three people in the room off guard, suddenly broke the silence.
	"I'm sorry guys, I'm so sorry," he managed to state emphatically.
He glanced at each man in the room, hoping to find some sort of forgiveness
or sympathy.  Justin continued to pace and JC ignored Chris's gaze.  Lance,
however, stared right back at Chris.  He took a moment to gather his
thoughts before speaking.
	"I'm not sure you understand what is going to happen, Chris," Lance
said grimly.  "You said this started off as a joke, but look what it has
become.  Not only is Joey's life hanging in the balance, so is ours as a
group."  Chris's gaze returned to the floor once he realized that he
wouldn't get the sympathy he had hoped for.  "What exactly did the doctor
say, JC?" Lance asked, putting Chris out of his mind for a moment to focus
on Joey.  Lance's question pulled JC out of his thoughts and he looked at
the younger man.
	"Um...she said that they were still cleansing his system and that
he wasn't out of the clear yet.  They don't know how long it will take to
get rid of it, but she said within the next four hours we should know for
sure whether or not he is gonna...gonna make it," JC managed to say before
a sob caught in his throat.  Tears stung at the back of his eyes as he
realized how close they were to actually losing a member of their family
and all because of a stupid, fucking joke.  A picture of Joey's face,
smiling as always, was floating in front of his eyes and the tears spilt
down his cheeks.
	Lance felt the need to comfort JC and he walked to his friend and
took a seat beside him.  While his right hand rubbed soothing circles on
JC's back, Lance looked up to see Justin stop pacing and take a seat across
the room.  The young man bent over at the waist, placing his head between
his knees.  Justin's muffled whimpers echoed throughout the room.  A frown
marred Lance's forehead and he sighed deeply.  He couldn't comfort them
all; he wasn't that strong.  Another several minutes passed before Lance
decided that there were several things to be done.
	"I know that this is tough, but from what I understand the doctor
is reporting this to the police and we need to decide on what we are going
to tell them," Lance stated.  JC looked up at Lance in shock.
	"Now?  Do we have to talk about this now?  Joey's in there and he
could be dead for all we know and you want to talk about what we are gonna
tell the police for the sake of our careers?!"  he said heatedly.
	"I care about Joey too!  But yes, we have to talk about this now!
We can't tell them what really happened.  It would get us.Chris in too much
trouble.  We have to come up with something that sounds plausible," Lance
finished his reply as calmly as possible, running his fingers through his
hair.  Chris looked up at his friends in despair.
	"I didn't mean for this to happen," Chris said lamely.
	"We know, Chris, we know.  What's done is done," Lance replied,
looking at JC and Justin for support.  Justin managed to lift his head and
nod in agreement while JC refused to respond at all.  Lance sighed and
continued, "I'm not sure what we should tell the police."
	"I wish we could tell the truth," Justin said simply, wishing that
none of this had happened in the first place.
	"So do I, Justin, but we can't.  The drug Chris used was illegal,
he shouldn't have had it the first place," Lance said, looking at Chris.
"Why did you have it anyway Chris?  And please don't lie to us, it'll just
make things worse."
	"Jesus, Lance.  You sound like management," Chris said with
contempt.  Lance started to speak, anger building behind his exterior.  He
was trying to be the mature one, trying to save all their asses, especially
Chris's and he was faced with contempt.  Chris's apology quickly squashed
his anger.  "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that, Lance."  Chris took a deep
breath before continuing.  Never would he have thought that last night
would lead him to this hospital, waiting to see if his best friend would
make it out alive.  "You guys have met Jack, right?  Jack Hoffman?  Well
sometimes I buy drugs off of him," Chris said before being cut off by
Justin's gasp.  "What?  You think I'm some damn saint or something?!" Chris
asked Justin angrily.  "You can be so damn naive sometimes!" Lance
stiffened as Chris shouted at Justin and he cautioned Chris to chill out.
Chris took another deep breath and offered Justin a small apology, after
which Justin nodded his acceptance.
	"We had no idea," JC said in a small voice.  "How long have you
been doing drugs?"  Chris hung his head and replied.
	"Well, I met Jack my last year at Universal."
	"You've been doing drugs since before we met!?" JC asked, his voice
raising in amazement.
	"Yeah, but nothing big.  Just little stuff like poppers and things,
never cocaine or anything like that!" Chris said in defense of himself.
"And just at parties.  I never took them if I was going on stage or meeting
fans or anything."
	"So you got the...what did you call them earlier?  Roofies?" Lance
asked for clarification.  Chris nodded and Lance continued, "You got the
roofies from Jack?  They're illegal, how did he get them?"
	"I don't know!" Chris replied in exasperation.  "I never asked him.
Anyway...they didn't cost much.  He gave me a full bottle...ten pills.  He
said something about how many milligrams were in each pill, but I didn't
pay any attention.  I had used them once or twice before and one pill would
last for about two hours.  You can make a person do some weird shit on that
stuff.  I...I just wanted to see what would happen to Joe if he took more
than one.  I never thought that he would totally pass out.  I was drunk and
I wasn't thinking straight," he finished lamely.
	"That's for damn sure," JC mumbled under his breath before rubbing
his eyes with the palms of his hands.  "So what do we tell the police?"
	"I don't know, I have to think.  I'm gonna go take a walk.  I'll be
back in a few minutes," Lance said quickly before walking out the door.  He
was in sore need of fresh air.  As he was walking towards the elevators, he
heard someone call out his name.  He turned slightly to look behind him to
find Justin jogging up to him.
	"Hi," Justin said softly.  "Do you mind if I join you?"  Lance
shook his head mutely and the two waited for the elevator in silence,
people hustling around them.  The elevator arrived and they stepped inside,
the doors closing quickly behind them.  Justin noted with no small amount
of relief that the elevator was empty so he turned to Lance and looked at
the older boy.  In the shiny reflection of the door, Lance saw Justin's
movements and he turned to face him.  "Do you think they have a camera in
here?" Justin whispered.  Lance's reply was to look up at the ceiling of
the elevator and search for a "hidden camera".
	"Nope," Lance whispered back when his search turned up nothing.
During his search, Justin had moved closer to him and he needed to lift his
head to look the younger man in the face.  "Justin." Lance said seconds
before Justin's arms closed around him to give him the hug that he
desperately needed.  The moment Justin's arms closed around him, Lance
melted into the embrace.  Once again, he placed his head in the crook of
Justin's neck, his lips grazing the soft flesh where Justin's shoulder met
his neck.  He loved this spot; he could live in this spot forever.
	"Lance, you know you can cry if you want to," Justin whispered into
Lance's soft hair.  At Justin's simple offer, Lance's breath caught in his
throat.  He could feel the build up of tears starting from behind eyes.
How he had longed for something like this.  Lance had always wanted someone
to pull him into a hug and ask to take away all of his pain.  Up `till now
Lance had always been the one to carry the burdens of the group.  Whether
Justin realized it or not, Lance had sometimes felt that he was taken for
granted by the group, used whenever someone needed a shoulder to cry on or
a sound bit of advice.  He was the one on the outside.  Justin had JC and
Chris had Joey, leaving Lance on the outside.  It had come as a huge shock
to find that Justin had feelings for him; he still had a little tingle of
doubt at the back of his mind.  Never in a million years, until recently
that is, would Lance have guessed that Justin was the one person he had
been looking.  Sure he had always had a crush on the younger boy, but that
his affections would be returned, never!
	The ding of the elevator doors opening brought Lance back to
reality and he pulled back from the embrace quickly.  He wiped at his eyes
with the backs of his hands before facing front and walking swiftly out of
the elevator, Justin at his heels.  Lance headed directly to the double
doors leading out of the hospital.  Justin had to jog to keep up.  They
didn't notice the glances they received as they exited the building, after
all, they were pretty much use to the attention.  There was a small garden
located near the hospital and Lance found a bench for two next to a large
azalea bush.  He sat down, leaving room for Justin, who quickly filled the
void.  They sat for a moment in silence, enjoying the closeness before
Justin spoke, worry filling his voice.
	"What are we gonna tell the police, Lance?" he asked timidly.  He
was looking to Lance for answers, putting him back in the role the older
boy was quickly coming to despise.  Lance shook his head and exhaled
loudly.
	"I don't know, Justin.  I don't know.  What do you think?" he asked
wanting Justin's opinion.  Justin turned slightly to look at Lance in
surprise.  "What?  I want to know what you think."
	"Oh, well, um...we have to come up with a story, right?" Justin
asked, unsure of what Lance wanted from him.  Lance nodded encouragingly
and Justin continued, "What if we say that someone else was trying to drug
Joe?  I mean, they can't prove that it was Chris, can they?"
	"I don't know.  I guess not," Lance said as he thought about it.
As long as there wasn't any evidence pointing towards Chris, the police
wouldn't suspect him.  "I guess we could say that there may have been
someone at the club that wanted to poison him, or something.  That is as
long as the stuff couldn't be traced back to Chris.  I guess we should talk
to Jack, ask him to keep his mouth closed."
	"Yeah, that's probably a good thing to do anyway," Justin replied
and Lance agreed.  Jack wasn't someone he could trust to keep quiet on his
own.
	"God I hate this!" Lance suddenly exploded, catching Justin by
surprise.  "It seems like we have to work double time to keep this from
everyone.  Instead of focusing on Joey's life, we have to worry about this
shit being leaked to the media.  If the press found out that it was Chris
who did this, they would have a field day!  It would totally ruin us!  We
have to lie to the damn police department even though we know where the
illegal drugs came from.  We are breaking the law just by lying to them."
Justin nodded at each point Lance made, suddenly aware that there were
several secrets that needed to be kept from the press; secrets that could
tear the group apart.  He wasn't sure if they, as `N Sync or as best
friends, could survive this Chris and Joey thing.  Another secret that
weighed heavily on his mind was his relationship with Lance.  It saddened
him that the best thing in his life was marred by the fact that he couldn't
share it with anyone else.  He didn't know what the guys would say about
them, and he certainly didn't want to find out anytime soon.  "Okay, let's
go.  I have some more questions to ask Chris," Lance said before standing
up and turning to look down at Justin.
	"Okay," Justin said softly before standing up to face Lance.  They
stood there for a moment, looking at each other.  They took that moment to
ignore reality and in the relatively deserted garden, Justin reached up to
cup Lance's face.  Lance offered Justin a small smile and Justin returned
it full force.  "I love you, Lance," he said.  Justin watched with pleasure
as Lance's face softened, full of emotion.  Lance reached up to cup
Justin's hand that lay on his cheek.  He gave it a gentle squeeze and
replied, his deep voice resonated with emotion.
	"God, I love you too, Justin."  As one, they turned and walked back
towards the hospital, side by side.  Every so often, their hands would
brush each other and electrical surges rushed throughout their bodies.
They reentered the waiting room to find JC pacing back and forth.  Chris
still occupied the same chair he had been in earlier, his head in his
hands.  "Chris?" Lance called softly.  Chris looked up at Lance, his
expression haunted.  `He looks so lost,' Lance thought to himself as he
looked at Chris.  "I think I know what to tell the police, but we've all
got to stand by it and I have to ask you a few more questions, okay?"
	"Okay," Chris agreed his voice low and hoarse.
	"Is there anyway they can retrace the roofies back to you?" Lance
questioned.
	"I...I don't think so.  I threw the bottle away as soon as I
dumped.dumped the pills into Joe's drink," Chris stated, trying to remember
the most elusive events of the previous night.
	"You threw the bottle into the trash?"
	"Yeah."
	"Okay, here's what we're gonna tell the police.  It may seem
totally stupid, but it's all I can think of," Lance said.  At everyone's
nod he continued, "Neither of you were aware that the drug was in Joey's
drink.  Someone else, we'll let the police worry about who, put the stuff
in Joey's drink.  Since you threw away the bottle, there's no evidence that
it was you.  There is one thing though," Lance paused, looking at Chris,
"you have to call Jack and tell him to keep his mouth shut.  I'm gonna go
call Johnny now, before the police get here.  I'm sure that if needed,
Johnny and Jive will be willing to pay Jack something if he isn't sure he
should keep quiet."  Chris nodded his understanding, ready to do anything
to keep the cops' focus off of him.
	"I'll do it right now," Chris said as he stood up and walked out of
the room.  Lance sighed heavily and followed Chris's footsteps to make the
dreaded call to Johnny.
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Okay, there ya go!  I struggled to find a place to end this one, so it
stopped when I got tired.  :) Y'all let me know what you thought about this
chapter, okay?  I think I'm starting to get a good idea of where this is
going, but I still want to know what y'all think.  nsajscgirl@yahoo.com
Talk to y'all later!  Robin :)