Date: Mon, 09 Oct 2000 23:53:33 EDT From: Jessica Taylor <midnight_violet18@hotmail.com> Subject: Picking Up the Pieces Chapter 4 Picking Up the Pieces Chapter 4 Author's Notes: Lalala...Backstreet ain't gay (but after today TRL that's up for a SERIOUS debate...)... shouldn't be reading this if your under 18 but hey how the heck are we gonna know?...First time posting on Nifty but by now this shit is old hat. Four more people have emailed me about my story.... YAYYYYY!!! (Doing a little Happy Dance of Joy) Okay so I think Backstreet is seriously fucked in the head after today's TRL... and that's all I'm gonna say bout that. (Fricking Highlights Boy and the rest of them...all insane I tell ya!!!!) And belated birthday wishes to Kevy Kev.... A special disclaimer goes with this chapter.. I don't know if this is how Sarah Michelle Gellar and Rosie O'Donnell feel about homosexual relationshps, but hey this is my story so screw it all... Chapter 4 "It's Zach. What'd you want to do Nick?" I heard Kevin say as my face immediately paled. Damn it, I really don't want to talk to him, but I guess I should. Swallowing the large lump that had already formed in my throat I said, "Give me the phone Kev." Both Brian and AJ looked at me like I was nuts. "You're actually gonna talk to that ass?" AJ asked, shocked at my statement. "Yeah." I said as I felt another knot form in my stomach, "I want at least some form of explanation as to why he did that." "I could tell ya that one without much thought; Zach's an ass." AJ said under his breath but it was still loud enough for me to hear. "Just be quiet for a sec Bone." I snapped as Kevin handed me the phone with a worried expression on his face. "I'll be fine Kev." "Okay." Kevin said warily as I uncovered the receiver and put the phone to my ear. "What do you want Zachary?" I said harshly into the phone, trying to put up a front to Zach that I knew wouldn't be able to last long. "Nick... I'm sorry." "That isn't gonna do much to help the situation right now Zach. You're the one that screwed this relationship up to the point of no return." "I know that Nick." Zach took a deep breath. "Can you meet me at our coffeehouse at noon? If you don't come then I'll never talk to you again." God, he was making this harder than it had to be. "Okay. I'll see." I said softly as I hung up the phone. "What'd that dipshit want?" AJ asked harshly. When J is pissed, the curse words spill out of him like there's no tomorrow. Early on, when we first started the group, Kevin tried to curb J's habit but he soon realized that it was useless to try and break him of it. "He wants to meet me at noon at out coffeehouse." I said, looking down and wringing my hands. It's a nervous habit I picked up over the years. "Do you want one of us to go with you Nick?" Kevin asked, sensing my nervousness. "Yeah." I knew I would need the emotional support, and I knew exactly who would be the best to bring with me, since I've spilled my heart out to him over the last 24 hours. "Kev could you come with me?" "Sure Nicky. We'll leave right after Rosie." "Speaking of which," Howie said as he looked down at his watch, "shouldn't we be leaving for that like now?" Kevin too looked to his watch and noticed the time, "Yeah. We gotta move. What are you two gonna do about Ames and Leigh?" he asked Frick and D. "Oh we're just letting them sleep. They knew we had to go on Rosie this morning, and they said that they really didn't feel like going yesterday." Brian responded. "Okay, then let's go." Kevin said as we all left the suite. ********** The limo ride was rather uneventful. We all sat in a comfortable silence as we started out the tinted windows of the limo. Finally getting to the studios, we slipped in through the back door, like we've done thousands of times before, and made our way to the green room. We were the first ones there, so while Howie and Bri claimed the couch, J, Kevin and I made our way over to the food on the side table set out for guests. AJ and I pilled high on sandwiches, crackers and these weird little croissant things that were on the table. Kevin just took a few crackers, a sandwich and a coke. While AJ and I sat down and munched on our food, Sarah Michelle Gellar walked into the room. I remember Kev saying something about her being on Rosie with us, but of course when it comes to business stuff, me and the rest of the guys never actually listen to Train. The last time we had seen Sarah was for the SNL taping we did about two years ago, so it was a nice surprise to see her. "Hey Sar!" I called to her as I put my food down and went to go hug her. "Hi Nick, how ya doin?" Sarah asked me after I let her go from the hug. "Not so hot." I said sullenly. "What happened now?" she asked concerned. Her and I really connected while we were doing the rehearsals for the show and I had emailed her a few times since then, but we hadn't seen each other face to face in a while. "Got dumped." I said dejectedly. "If he dumped you Nick, he wasn't worth it. Trust me." she smiled. The last boyfriend I had, Drake, was a big SNL and Buffy fan, so he insisted I bring him to rehearsals. During one of the breaks, Drake and I were off in what we thought was a secluded room... making out. Sarah came in looking for, of all things, the bathroom and she caught us. She was totally cool with me being gay, and she's one of the VERY FEW people besides the guys that know. "Yeah, you're right. That's the same thing Kev is trying to tell me. It has yet to sink in though." I said as I looked down at my shoe as I scuffed it on the floor. "Well we ALL know that Kevin is a very smart man." Sarah smiled as she placed her finger under my chin and lifted my head up to meet her eyes, "Maybe you should let it sink in quicker." "Uh oh Sarah!" AJ said sarcastically. "You just inflated Kev's ego ten times more than normal. Now he's going to be a pain in the ass to work with for the next month!" Kevin hit AJ upside the head. "Shut up." Everyone in the room laughed. Rosie came in as everyone died down their laughter. "What'd I miss guys?" she smiled. "Nothin' much. Good ol' Sarah over there just inflated Kev's ego to the point of annoyance." AJ said. "She did not." Kevin said. "Sure." AJ rolled his eyes. "Okay okay. Enough you two." Rosie reprimanded. She always treated us like her children, and she was the only one Kevin ever let reprimand her. "Nicky! How are you hunny?" Rosie said as she hugged me. "Where's Zach?" I subconsciously recoiled when Rosie mentioned Zach's name. She was another one of the few people who knew I was gay. The last time we had appeared on Rosie, Zach came with us. "What's the matter?" Rosie asked concerned when she saw me recoil. "Me and Zach broke up. He met someone else... a girl." I admonished. "Oh I am sooo sorry." She said as she gave me another hug, only this one was a lot tighter. "It's okay." "You just forget about that guy, you'll meet someone better." Rosie smiled as she released me. "I'll see the rest of you a little later, I need to go to makeup and get ready to go on." "See ya later Rosie." We all said as she walked out of the green room. "Told ya." Sarah singed softly. "Okay." I rolled my eyes. Okay so maybe I'm a little hardheaded. "Sarah, you need to get to make up." A stagehand said a few minutes later. "Okay. See you guys later. Maybe we can get together again soon." Sarah said, as she was led away. Me and the rest of the guys watched Rosie's opening monologue, including when she said "Guess who we have today?' and she started playing a clip of 'I Want It That Way', and was singing along with us. She'd probably kill me if I said this openly, but... she can't sing as well as she think she can. Halfway through Sarah and Rosie talking about Sarah's new movie, 'As the Days Go By', another stagehand came into the green room and said, "Backstreet Boys you need to go to makeup." "Okay." Kevin said as we all got up from where we were sitting and followed the stagehand out. We were slated to sing, "Shape of My Heart', and then we were gonna do an interview with Rosie about the new album and we were gonna play some game with a bunch of fans chosen from the audience. After makeup, we sat behind the curtain and got prepped to perform. As we waited, me rather impatiently, I looked down at my watch to see what time it was. I noticed it was 10:30. In an hour and a half, I was going to go meet Zach. Damn it. Why did I agree to meet him again? Oh that's right Carter, you wanted to drag this on as long as possible. Stupid me. A few seconds later, we heard in our earpieces that the show was gonna start in a few seconds. Show time. 'Shape' went off without a hitch. Bone sounded a little flat, but hey ya can't be perfect all the time. When J ended the last note, Rosie came over and draped her arms around me and Howie, and said into the camera "We'll be right back with the Backstreet Boys." while the audience screamed as loud as they could. Me, Rosie and the guys all went over to Rosie's desk and the set up five chairs for us to sit at. I ended up sitting right next to Kevin on the end chair in the first row. When we came back from commercial Rosie started the interview. "So how have you been? We haven't seen you in such a long time!" "Good." We chorused. "So how are Amy and Leighanne?" Rosie asked Bri and Howie. "They're good. In fact..." Brian talked while I zoned him out. I zoned the guys out lots of times, especially during interviews. It was SOO boring hearing the same things discussed over and over again, especially after the hundredth ort so guest spot on a show. As I stared straight ahead at the crowd I could swear that I saw Zach in the back of the audience, but it was probably just my imagination. "So wait a second, you guys thought up the name for this album at the photo shoot? There was no long thought process as to the title? I mean Black and Blue can be pretty meaningful, especially from your standpoint." I heard Rosie say. "Yup. Rok thought of it basically because we were wearing black suits and there was a blue background behind us. Then we came up with all the meaningful stuff. We were having no absolute luck in finding a title until Brian over here suggested it." AJ said. Okay so maybe our ideas were a little stupid sometimes, but hey, it worked out didn't it? (**Author's note-- I just couldn't let them live this one down.**) I didn't hear much of the rest of the interview from sheer boredom and anxiousness of meeting Zach in... now it was an hour and 15 minutes. Kevin nudged me with his arm when they were at another commercial break. "Can you TRY and pay attention now?" He whispered. Kevin always was able to notice me zoning out in an interview. "Yeah. Are we doing that contest thing next?" I asked. "Yep. Come on." Kevin said as he pulled me up and led me back over to the stage area. While we sat on one side, behind this weird podium, there were five very nervous and anxious fans opposite us sitting at another podium. Rosie told us that the basic premise of the game was that we would be answering basic trivia questions, some related to us, and some related to basic pop culture type stuff. If we won, the whole audience and the five girls got copies of 'Black and Blue'. If they girls won, the audience still got copies of 'Black and Blue', but we also signed the girls copies of the album. Anyway, by the end of the game, the score was us 14 and the girls had 16, so they won. We stayed around an extra 15 minutes, said hi to the girls, and signed their copies of the album. They were really nice girls, but I couldn't tell you their names for the life of me. It was like, Cindy, Heather, Jamie, Ruth and Kimberly or something like that. After the informal meet and greet, me and Kevin left separately to go call a cab and meet Zach down in the village at our coffeehouse. I swallowed my nervousness as I stepped first into the cab and Kevin closed the door, sealing me in my fate to go meet Zach and see where it all went wrong. ********** Fin. Oh and I personally think this chapter isn't very good, but the next one will be better... Trust me. Email is still Midnight_Violet18@hotmail.com. GO EMAIL ME DANG IT!!!