Date: Wed, 13 Sep 2000 22:42:55 CDT
From: T. Marie <ficklepickle76@hotmail.com>
Subject: Searching For The Light- Chapter 8

Disclaimer: This story is a work of fiction, loosely based on the members of
*NSYNC.  This story is not meant to imply the sexuality of the members of
*NSYNC or that they would say or do any of the things mentioned.  This story
will contain explicit homosexual content.  If it is illegal for you to read
fiction of this type please stop reading now.  This story is copyright 2000
T. Marie.  Comments, suggestions, feedback... may be sent c/o
ficklepickle76@hotmail.com

Searching For the Light (c) 2000 T. Marie

Chapter 8- Light of Some Kind

The tour stopped in New York for a little over a week and the men of *NSYNC
had begun to feel as if the hotel were home.  They'd performed two night's
in a row had a fairly relaxing schedule for the next three days.  Additional
concerts had been scheduled for the last two nights in the Big Apple.  Each
of the men had spent the morning relaxing and were planning on meeting at
3:00 PM to leave for a photo shoot.

Justin had a towel wrapped around his slender hips. "Battle Flag" by Low
Fidelity All Stars was blasting on his portable CD player. His eyes were
closed as the danced to the beat, mouthing along to the words. Randomly he
moved around the hotel room picking out his clothing for the day.   JC
stepped into the room unnoticed and watched his boyfriend with amusement.
He moved behind Justin to sit on the bed, as Justin wiggled closer to the
bed JC reached out with a muscled arm and yanked the edge of the towel.
Justin looked up at JC in surprise, slowly a knowing smile came to his lips.
Justin moved towards JC and the towel fell to the floor unnoticed.

JC ran a hand over Justin's bare chest as Justin straddled JC's hips.  He
pressed his growing erection against the fly of JC's khaki pants.  JC's
hands ran over the length of Justin's back to his softly curved buttocks, he
cupped the cheeks in his nimble fingered hands pulling his boyfriend closer
against him.  As one they scooted back further on the bed.  Justin reached
between their bodies and began unbuttoning JC's shirt.  The shirt was
quickly thrown to the floor as Justin urgently unsnapped his boyfriend's
pants.

When the older man was fully naked Justin lunged towards him feeling a
passion he'd never felt before.  He didn't just want JC he needed him.   JC
leaned up towards Justin and their lips met.  The kiss was hot, wet and
forceful.  Justin whimpered as he felt JC's penis become hard against his
thigh.  Suddenly aware of just how close they were to consummating the
relationship Justin paused.  He slowly moved to lie beside JC.  He saw the
look in his boyfriends eyes change from one of passion, to one of confusion.

"What's wrong Jus?"

"Are we ready for this Josh?"

"What do you mean?  Don't you want me?" JC asked softly, the hurt showing
plainly on his face.

"Yes, I want you.  I want you more than I've ever wanted anything in my
life.  I need you JC; I need to be with you.  I'm afraid though."

"Afraid of what?  Pain?"

Justin smiled "No, nothing like that.  I'm afraid that it won't be the same
that things between us will change.  And that you'll feel the same way about
me as you did towards Tom and Bobbie.  That it's just about the sex."

"I thought, we already discussed this, I know you care about me and that
this is real.  I love you Justin."  JC shook his head to clear his thoughts.
  "No, that's not it.  I mean I love you but I'm also in love with you."  JC
reached out and took Justin's hand, as he spoke he absentmindedly-traced
designs in his boyfriend's palm with the tip of his finger.

"I know that's how you feel, and I want you to know that I'm in love with
you. And that I don't want to mess around just 'coz it feels good.  I wanna
be close to you, show you exactly how much I love you" Justin said kissing
JC softly on his lips.

"You worry too much" JC said with a slight smile.  "It's okay to just let
things happen Jus, we don't have to analyze every step of out relationship.
I don't compare us to Bobbie and Tom, or anyone else."  With that comment JC
squeezed Justin's hand reassuringly.  "Justin, can I ask you something
without you getting upset?"

Justin frowned slightly and worry began to cloud his blue eyes. "Sure, JC.
Go ahead and ask."

"Why are you so worried about this?  Is it because of the depression, are
you afraid of hurting me?"

Justin started to protest then suddenly he stopped.  He paused for a moment
with his mouth open, closing his mouth he sat perfectly still contemplating
JC's question. As he sat there thinking a worry line began to crease his
forehead.  "You know, I never really thought about it, but maybe I was
trying to protect you.  I saw how much the depression hurt you, how
miserable you were and I don't want to be the one to make you feel that
way."

"Justin, " JC said gently "that's not your responsibility.  All
relationships have problems, you can't try to predict everything that's
gonna happen.  If we get in a fight, or one of us does something the other
doesn't like, it's okay.   I can deal with that; I'm not that fragile.
Besides, what kind of relationship are we going to have if you constantly
feel the need to baby me?  That's not fair to either one of us.  I'll never
know what you really want, and you'll never get what you need. This is a
two-way relationship.  We both give and take."

"I'm sorry, I never even thought about it like that, I just wanted
everything to be perfect."

JC saw the anxiety on Justin's face and snuggled closer, placing a kiss on
his cheek to reassure him.  "You were trying to make it perfect for me, but
I want you to be happy too."

"I've been happy so far," Justin said with a grin.  JC smiled and leaned
closer to Justin.  Just as their lips were about to meet there was a loud
knock on the door.

JC placed a quick peck on Justin's lips and said "Were gonna have to finish
this later" the telltale glint in his eye let Justin know he wasn't speaking
of the conversation.

"Is that a threat Mr. Chasez?"  Justin teased bending over to grab his
T-shirt and boxers.

Before opening the door JC grabbed a bathrobe from the back of the chair, he
slipped it on, grinned at Justin replying "Nope, that's a promise."

Joey jumped into the room excitedly as JC pulled the door open.  "Okay, you
guys have got to help me." Joey announced before either JC or Justin could
say anything.  "Well, you know that photo shoot we had scheduled for this
evening?  It's been rescheduled 'til tomorrow 'cos of the rain and all.
Anyway," Joey continued on as Justin and JC exchanged amused glances. "I
wanna do something special for Lance, like something different so I need
ideas."

"Wait up a second Joey, when did you find out about the photo shoot being
rescheduled?"  JC asked.

"Johnny called Lance a few minutes ago, and I've been wanting to do
something special, like just the two of us.  We just have been so busy, so
this seemed like the perfect opportunity.  I just can't think of what to
do."

"I know what you can do." JC said picking up a copy of "The Voice" that he'd
been reading earlier.  He pointed to an ad "It's this really awesome laser
show, at the planetarium."

"Lemme see" Joey said pulling the paper from JC's hands.

"Oh yeah, " Justin interjected "I heard about that, they like play Pink
Floyd music some dude's in the elevator were talking about it."

"Cool, this sounds awesome.   I better go start making plans."  Joey started
walking out of the room, still looking at the advertisement.  When he
reached the door he looked sheepishly over his shoulder "Thanks guys, C I'll
bring your paper back later" he added as an afterthought.

Justin locked the door behind Joey and plopped down on the bed next to JC.
"So, now that there's no photo shoot what do you want to do tonight?"

"This is nice," JC said leaning back into the pillow and letting his eyes
drift shut.

"Uh-uh, we are not gonna spend one of our only free nights locked in a hotel
room sleeping."  Justin grinned and ran his finger down JC's arm "We can
spend the night in the locked in the room, I just don't wanna sleep. We
gotta have some fun."

JC sat up suddenly and moved over Justin to pin him to the bed.  Looking
down into his boyfriend's eyes he said, "You want to have fun?"  He kissed
Justin's neck and then got up from the bed tugging Justin's arm "Finish
getting dressed, grab a hat, were gonna go have fun."

Justin stuck out his lower lip in a mock pout "I though we were just gonna
have some fun here."

"Don't pout" JC scolded playfully.  "We'll be back here soon enough."

JC stopped to pick up an obligatory bodyguard and after a whispered debate
JC, Justin and Eric headed out towards the village. "Where are we going?"
Justin asked over and over until finally JC clamped his hand over his mouth.

"You'll see, just be patient."

They reached Union Square and stopped in front of Toys R Us.   Justin's eyes
lit up as he saw their destination.  He slipped on a baseball cap and the
three men entered the store.  Justin grabbed a cart and with Eric trailing a
few feet behind the two young men attempted to fill the cart with, play-doh,
jacks, silly putty, water guns, basketball cards.  JC snuck in a pack of
*NSYNC cards to look for pictures of Justin.  Superballs, a slinky, an etch
a sketch, Archie comic books, coloring books and crayons all found their way
into the red shopping basket. While in the collectable card isle JC snuck in
a pack of *NSYNC cards to look for pictures of Justin.  Justin's excitement
grew with each isle and by the time they made their way to the cash register
he was literally beaming.  As soon as they were back in the car, Justin
rifled through the bags the entire way back to the hotel exclaiming over
each new thing as if he'd never seen it before.

"Why don't you go show Chris what we got.  I need to do something in the
room, I'll call you when it's ready."

"Chris is gonna try and steal our stuff ya know. Plus, I want to know what
you're doing."

"You liked my last surprise right?  Just think of poor Chris alone in his
room, we got plenty of stuff to share."

Justin smiled at JC's serious tone of voice and headed off to find Chris.
After about half an hour JC called Chris's room and informed Justin that it
was okay for him to come back to their suite.  As Justin entered the hotel
room he saw that JC had turned it into a big fort.  Blankets were draped
over the tables and chairs and a tunnel had been created between the beds.
The makeshift tent was lit from within with flashlights.  JC led Justin
under the tent of sheets and blankets to a soft pallet he'd made on the
floor.  The two men sprawled on the pile of blankets examining their
goodies.

"This is great!" Justin said over and over, amazed at what JC had done.
"I've never done this before, not even when I was a kid.  What made you
think of doing this?"

"I just wanted us to have some fun. Things have been pretty crazy lately, so
I thought we should have a night where we could just goof off, and maybe
forget we're adults for a while."

Justin leaned down and kissed JC softly, their lips barley brushing.  "Umm,
you taste sweet."  JC said, "Like bubble gum."

"Oh yeah, these basketball cards have really good gum, it's not the regular
kind I think it's blueberry flavored."  He handed a pack to JC and his
boyfriend found the gum then idly shuffled through the cards before handing
them back to Justin.

"I didn't see a card with my favorite basketball player on it in that
stack." JC informed Justin.

Justin looked down at the stack of trading cards in his hand.  He glanced
through them and asked, "Who's your favorite player?"

"You." JC answered with a smirk.

"You're a goofball."

"I am not... Bounce" JC retorted then leaned over Justin to tickle him.

"Stop! Stop, please" Justin cried out between bursts of laughter.  He was
rolling from side to side, trying to avoid JC's probing hands. "Aieeee,
please JC, I'm gonna pee" Justin squealed.

At that comment JC rocked back on his heels laughing "Oh, My God.  You
totally sounded like a girl just then."  JC cracked up in laughter leaning
over Justin to help him up.  Suddenly the piece of gum JC was chewing fell
out of his laugh-slackened mouth. "Oh, nooooo" JC laughed even harder.

'What?" Justin asked sitting up trying to regain his breath.

"My gum" JC giggled hysterically.  "It fell in your hair."

"What!"  Justin exclaimed bringing his hands up to his curls to search for
the sticky substance.  "Ick, how in the hell am I supposed to get this out!"
he pulled his fingers away from the gooey mess and turned to JC.

"Justin, I'm sorry, it just kinda fell out of my mouth when I was laughing."
JC quickly explained.

"I know you didn't do it on purpose, now we just have to find a way to get
it out!"

"How about ice, I've heard that if you freeze it, it will just break out of
the hair"

"It's worth a try" Justin moved from under the tent of blankets to one of
the stripped down beds and waited for JC to return from the icemaker.

After struggling with the ice for almost an hour the men gave up and called
down to the room of one of their hairstylists. Luckily Erin was in her room.
   After they'd used up Erin's resources of Peanut butter, goo-be-gone and
anything else that had ever worked at removing sticky substances Erin broke
the news to Justin.  "I'm sorry Hon, looks like were gonna have to cut it."

Justin half-heartedly ran a hand through the unmatted curls on the left side
of his head.  "I guess it was time for a haircut anyway."  He sighed "Go for
it."

Several pounds lighter Justin led JC back to the their room.  They crawled
back under the cave of blankets and made themselves comfortable.   Justin
turned to JC with a huge grin on his face.  "So, where were we?"  Justin
laid down on the pallet of blankets I think I was here, and you were there"
he patted the spot next to his body.

JC began to unbutton his shirt, crawling closer to where Justin was laying.
As Justin reached for the hem of his T-shirt JC grinned and said,  "Let me".
  He raised the shirt slowly, planting kisses on the skin that was revealed.
Justin felt the hairs on his arms stand on end; JC's kisses were sending
electric currents coursing through his body. When both of their shirts were
off Justin reached for JC, and began undoing his pants.

Justin slipped out of his jeans and moved to the pallet on the floor. JC
moved with him a tangle of arms and legs as they kissed. Justin slowly ran
his hands over JC's chest, teasing the nipples with his fingertips. He
leaned in and kissed JC's mouth nipping his upper lip repeatedly until JC
moved his hands up to cup his boyfriends face and steady the kiss. Justin
felt JC struggling to remove his boxer briefs; the elastic waistband
wouldn't tug free of his growing erection.

"Let me do it." Justin said laughing softly. After the offending garment was
removed JC pushed Justin back on the bed kissing him as he hands explored
the softness of Justin's back and buttocks. JC moved on top of Justin
lowering his head to take a one flat nipple into his mouth. Justin moaned
and arched against JC's lips.  JC circled the nipple with his tongue and
drew it into his hot mouth; he moved to Justin's other nipple and gave it
the same treatment. Justin slid him hands down JC's back and removed the
loose fitting boxers, JC groaned as Justin's hand brushed against his penis.

JC moved to Justin's side kissing his stomach and nibbling at his belly
button. He made his way around his thigh, as his nose grazed a sensitive
spot on his inner thigh he shivered. JC explored Justin's length with his
fingers, learning his texture. Justin closed his eyes and threw his head
back against the pillow enjoying the erotic sensations.  JC moved his
fingers up and down, then used his tongue to trace the path his fingers had
earlier. Justin cried out when JC touched the head of his penis with his
tongue.  After placing kisses along the length of Justin's erection JC made
his way up his body nibbling as he went.

Justin reached between their bodies, and investigated JC's hard penis with
his fingers. Sliding down his boyfriend's body he used a tactic similar to
JC's. Justin traced JC's Adams apple and collarbone with the tip of his
tongue.  He moved to JC's nipples teasing them with him lips as he continued
down his stomach placing kisses all over it. Then and he began running his
hand up and down his penis softly, JC growled and moaned loudly. JC's
obvious excitement made him feel powerful; Justin tenderly replaced his hand
with his lips. As Justin's mouth closed over the tip of his penis, JC
growled again, pulling him up and positioning Justin above him.

"Condoms" Justin groaned, "we don't have condoms."

"I got some" JC explained moving away to rifle through his duffel bag
nearby.

"Can you help me put this on?" Justin asked.

JC opened the wrapper and placed the condom on Justin's penis rolling it
down. When it was on all the way.  They reassumed the positions they had
been in; JC kissed Justin's neck with urgency. Justin groped at JC's
entrance and he inserted one long finger. Their mouths met insistently.

With a groan Justin moved arranging himself between JC's open legs.
Hesitantly he entered JC's body, gently kissing him the entire time. When
Justin was partially inside him he felt some resistance. He moved his hand
back down between their bodies and stroked JC's penis as he pushed into his
tight entrance. JC cried out at the initial pressure, but as Justin began to
move the pain subsided.  The couple was still kissing; JC's tongue moving
wildly in Justin's mouth stopping occasionally to nibble on his lips.

JC began to move his hips in rhythm with Justin's, he grunted nuzzling
Justin's neck with his slightly parted lips. As JC's moans began to meet
Justin's groans and grunts JC grasped Justin's back.   Feeling JC's spasm
Justin's movements slowed. After a few more thrusts Justin reached his
climax, crying out JC's name.   He rolled off of JC sweating and gathered
his boyfriend in his arms.

When he had regained his breath he asked, "Are you okay?"

JC smiled and kissed his lips tenderly, "I'm fine. What about you?"

"I'm great." He buried his head in the side if his neck, burrowing his nose
and kissing the soft skin.    Justin Leaned over JC. Looking him streight in
the eyes, "I love you, you know."

JC smiled "Does that mean you're gonna turn out the light?"

Justin slowly got up and switched off the light; he carefully crawled back
to his spot next to JC.  JC reached out and pulled Justin against his body,
When Justin rested his head on his chest JC ran his fingers through Justin's
freshly cropped curls.  "I love you too Justin."


To Be Continued?????