Date: Wed, 16 May 2001 04:56:07
From: Jeff Langdon <jeff_langdon@hotmail.com>
Subject: Westlife Romance - Chapter 34

This story is pure fiction and involves the members of Westlife.  I am in
no way implying anything about the sexuality of any of their members.  This
is purely a fictional story.  Enjoy!

I would really, really appreciate some feedback on the story...so please
send any comments and/or suggestions to jeff_langdon@hotmail.com.  I would
love to hear from you!!

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Westlife Romance - Part 34

Nicky splashed cold water on his face and looked into the mirror.  What he
saw shocked him.  "Whatever happened to the Nicky who knew how to smile?"
he asked himself.  "Where is the Nicky who was so happy?"  Then, a voice
inside of him seemed to taunt him.  "Stop feeling sorry for yourself, Nicky
Byrne.  Stop being such a wimp!!  You can't trust anyone but yourself in
this world."

Pausing for a moment, Nicky gave this imaginary voice some thought.  Then
it started again.  "Everyone in this world is only looking out for
themselves.  You'd be a fool if you believed that someone would actually
truly care for you.  There's no such thing as true love, Nicky.  When will
you learn??"  Nicky closed his eyes and clenched his fists, not wanting to
hear this strange voice inside of him.

He didn't remember how long he stayed in the bathroom, but when he went
back into the bedroom, Bryan was no longer there.  The sun was rising so it
must have been at least a couple of hours.  Getting dressed, Nicky said to
himself, "Get a grip, Byrne.  You're the only one that you can trust.  No
one can ever hurt you again."  An hour later, Nicky strode into the lounge,
sat down at the table and began eating his breakfast, totally oblivious to
four pairs of astonished eyes staring at him.

Only after several minutes did Nicky finally realize the attention that he
was getting.  "What?" he asked.

"Uh...nothing," Shane stuttered.  He was puzzled.  Only an hour earlier,
Bryan came to his room in tears, telling him how broken and shattered Nicky
was.  And now, what he saw was the exact opposite of what Bryan described.

Bryan was even more confused.  How could Nicky change so quickly?  He was
trembling and crying earlier and now he seems as good as new.  Something
wasn't adding up.  He continued to stare, not realizing that Nicky was
beginning to get irritated by the other lads' strange behaviour.

"What is it?" Nicky snapped, clearly annoyed.

"It's nothing..." Bryan replied softly, taken aback by Nicky's tone of
voice.

Nicky rolled his eyes, got up abruptly and left the room without saying
another word.

"What's with him?" Shane asked with a confused look.

"I don't know..." Bryan whispered, a worried expression clearly etched on
his face.

That day during the photo shoot, the lads stayed out of Nicky's way.  He
seemed like he was on a warpath, only instead of yelling at everyone, he
gave everyone an icy reception.

Kian felt horrible, convincing himself that he was the cause of the mess.
Bryan hated him, Nicky hated him, Mark kept a distance from him, and Shane
probably just tolerated him out of pity.

	*	*	*	*	*	*	*	*	*

During the extended lunch break, Mark snuck out of the studio and walked to
a nearby park.  He picked a secluded spot and then took out his mobile.

"Hey, Michelle?  It's Mark."

"Mark!!  How are you??  I haven't heard from you in ages!!"

"Yeah, I'm so sorry about that.  You know how lazy I can get..."

"So you're in the States, I hear," Michelle asked cheerfully.

"Yeah, we're doing a promotional tour here.  So how are things with you?"

"Pretty good, Mark.  Things are finally falling into place."

"That's great, Michelle.  I always told you you'd be a great psychologist
one day."

"Well Mark, Dr. Taylor here thinks that Mr. Feehily didn't call just to say
hi and offer his congratulations."

Mark chuckled at Michelle's analysis.  "Well, you're right."

"What's on your mind?"

"I need your help with something."

"What is it?"

Mark filled Michelle in on Nicky's ordeal, leaving out the names of the
people involved, hoping that Michelle could give him answers to his
questions.

"So anyways, earlier this morning, my friend found him trembling and
sobbing from a nightmare.  Then later on, he seemed like a totally
different person.  And what's more, he's been very short-tempered today and
giving everyone the cold shoulder."

"Hmm...sounds typical."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, it seems that your friend is going through another stage in the
process."

"What process?"

"Well, it depends on how you look at it.  It could end up to be part of the
healing process, or it could take him farther down the path to depression."

"Is there anything we can do to make sure it's the first possibility and
not the second?"

"Well, you have to be careful.  This is a very delicate stage right now.
He is probably very emotionally unstable and can be extremely sensitive to
anything and everything.  Even simple comments can be misinterpreted
easily.  It's going to test your patience severely."

"I understand.  But will he get better?"

"Hard to say.  It all depends on when or whether he can face what has
happened to him head-on instead of looking for other avenues to vent his
anger and hurt."

"Thanks, Michelle.  I really appreciate your help."

"Don't mention it, Mark.  Just take me out to dinner when you visit
Dublin," Michelle laughed.

"You've got yourself a deal, girl," Mark answered.  "You take care of
yourself, k?"

"Sure thing.  You too, Mark.  And give me a call if you need anything."

	*	*	*	*	*	*	*	*	*

Back at the studio, the lads were finishing up their lunch and getting
ready to head back to photo shoot.  In a way, they were looking forward to
the party that they were going to attend tonight.  But then again, with
their relationships on the rocks, no one was in the mood for much partying.
They just hoped that for a few hours, they can forget their problems and
just let their tensions out.

Kian sat by the window by himself and stared out at nothing.  He could feel
Bryan's hatred towards him.  He didn't blame Bryan one bit, he only had
himself to blame.  Then there was the Derek problem.  How was he ever going
to deal with Derek?  He was lost in his thoughts when he felt a hand on his
shoulders.  It was Shane.

"You ok there, mate?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Considering the circumstances, I think I'm coping," Kian said glumly.

"Give them some time, okay, Ki?  It'll take time," Shane said trying to
comfort Kian.  He turned and he could see Nicky's icy stare.  The stare was
so cold it made Shane shiver slightly.

Bryan came back from getting a bottle of water and sat beside Nicky.  "How
are you doing, Nix?"

"I told you I'm fine, Bryan!" Nicky snapped angrily.  "Why do you have to
keep asking??"

Bryan bit his lips and held back his tears.  Nicky had never talked in this
tone to him before.  Never.  He knew Nicky was upset but this didn't make
it any less painful.

"I'm just worried, Nix.  I'm sorry."

"Well, quit worrying.  And for the last time, I'm fine!!" Nicky yelled
before storming off.  He walked down the corridor quickly, brushing by Mark
without acknowledging him.

Bryan sat in his chair, fighting to hold back the tears.  He turned away so
Kian and Shane wouldn't see, but as he turned, he saw Mark looking at him
with sympathy.  Bryan gave up, buried his face in his hands and wept
quietly.

...to be continued....

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Hope you enjoyed this segment.  Let me know what you think!!

I'd love to hear any comments/ideas/questions.  Please e-mail me at
jeff_langdon@hotmail.com.