Date: Sat, 25 May 2002 22:23:00 +0800
From: ryan <yr_ry_@hotmail.com>
Subject: What I See 14

*Disclaimer*

If you are under 18 or not of legal age in your country, please do not read
on. If you couldn't accept themes of homosexuality and the like, please
don't read on. This is a story concerning gay males having intimate
relationships and is considered FOR ADULTS ONLY due to its sexual theme and
contents. BUT if you really like this stuff, please don't tell others.

Everything in this story is purely FICTIONAL. Or in simpler terms, it's not
true!!! Even if this story involves NSYNC, a real, successful American
singing group, and a fictitious character, all that happens in here is
fictional... again, it's not true. If there are instances that it is
similar to what happened in the real world, it doesn't mean that it's
really true. I don't know anything about their sexuality, as far as the I
and the world know, they're straight as an arrow so I dunno if they're gay
(but I do have my speculations) or not but I wrote this out of freedom of
speech and my love for these guys and slash fiction. I don't own or know
NSYNC personally. AGAIN, it's NOT TRUE!!! but don't we all hope that it's
true... hehehehe...


*First Words*

Hi guys. This is my 3rd work here in the boyband section of the Nifty
Archives. I dunno why I called it "What I See" but I just ran out of ideas
for a title and thought of something simple. So the title, What I See was
born *giggle*. I dunno if I can manage my 3 stories at the same time but
Crossed Paths is in its "season break" and Reformation is still there. But
I'll really try my best to update all my stories. Remember, I love
feedbacks.

Mail me at my NEW Addie at yr_ry_@hotmail.com


What I See Chapter 14

Have you ever felt being unease with yourself whatever you do? Well, that's
what I'm feeling at the moment. I was still facing my computer in my little
cubicle in the office I worked in but I can't seem to fish for something in
my mind to do something productive. My mind just kept on returning to
Josh's face. His angelic and beautiful face.

"You're drifting again!" Will smack me at the back. It took me by surprise
and made me jump a little. When I looked at Will, he was laughing. "Aaaaaw,
you're still thinking of your boyfriend?" He teased me making me blush a
bit. "Nothing to hide, Kyle. It's perfectly normal."

"I just miss him, you know." I said softly as I slouched on my chair.

"Yeah, only 2 days since he left." He replied sarcastically. It's just 2
days? It seemed to be weeks already since JC rode the bus to God knows
where. Two days and I'm acting like crazy and we're not gonna be seeing
each other for another 2 months. I sighed with this realization. Life is
gonna be really hard.

"Well, when you have a girlfriend and she's away from you, I'll surely
remind you." I told him. He just made a mock scared look and cracked after
a few seconds. Will is surely be teasing me for a while. "Let's just go
back to work." I told him.

"If you can concentrate on your work." He said which is just so true. I
looked at my watch and it read 9:00am. It was just 9:00am. It was like I
was here in this office for hours already. Now, time is against me. Oh
well, better make the best of what I have.

I was starting to sketch some ideas on my notepad when the phone rang. I
picked up the phone and answered it. "Kyle Sanders."

"Hey." A voice replied -- a too familiar voice for me.

"Josh! How are you, sweetie?" I said. Will was looking at me
strangely. Actually, I think I was acting too bubbly. Come to think of it,
I was acting like a teenage girl with her boyfriend. Can you blame me? I
love the guy.

"I just woke up, actually." He answered. I guess that was a given
considering the time and the different time zone he must be in. By the way,
where on earth was he this time?

"JC, where are you?" I asked.

"On our way to Oakland. We have an off day so I decided to give my little
angel a call first thing when I wake up." He said giggling a little bit. I
love it when he's being romantic.

"Aaaaaw!" I cooed and giggled afterwards. When the giggles died down, it
was like a truck hit me. I dunno why but I felt a little sad at that
moment. "I miss you." I told him.

I heard only a few heavy breaths after what I said. I closed my eyes trying
to ease the pain and the longing that I was feeling -- it was damn hard. "I
miss you too." JC's voice cracked. I dunno when I hear JC's voice crack and
I know that he's gonna be crying next, I tend to tear up as well.

"Please don't cry. Please don't." I pleaded with JC as I clutched the
handset. "You know that I can't stand you crying." I whispered. I could
hear JC sniffling softly and it seemed that he was covering the mouthpiece
coz it was so faint but I could still hear it. He was prolly trying to
compose himself.

"Who's crying anyway?" JC's strong voice returned but I knew that he had
shed a few tears -- and I know that he knows that too. But we just continue
the facade that nothing happened; there was no crying whatsoever. "How's
work?" He successfully changed the subject.

"Same old thing! I am not swamped with work which I anticipated but I'm
having a hard time focusing because of one gorgeous blue-eyed guy." I tried
to be in a playful mode trying to drown the sorrows of a long distance
relationship.

"Aaaaaaw!" He cooed.

"Yeah, my mind has been filled with Justin lately." I teased.

"Hey!" He protested.

"I was just kidding! You know that you are the only gorgeous blue-eyed guy
in life!" I declared to him and laughed afterwards seeing the silliness and
cheesiness of what I said. Maybe, I'll be big as a lyricist of one of the
boybands out there -- an alternative occupation, perhaps? "So anything new
with you and the others?" I asked.

"New? Lemme see..." JC paused for a while. "Lance is still having his tests
for his outer space thing. Um, Joey is trying to patch up the final touches
in his movie with his friend and Chris is... Chris." He laughed at his
remark with Chris. "Oh, I have a little gossip!" He said like a hyper
child. I could imagine JC bouncing from where he was seated as the bus
drove off.

"Ooh! C'mon, you know I live for gossips!" I said flamboyantly trying to be
one with the mood.

"Justin and Britney finally broke up." He whispered to me like he was
telling me a dirty secret -- well, it was a dirty secret as far as the
world was concerned.

"Really?" I gasped and laughed. "Josh, that news has been circulating
around the world since way way back!" I told him.

"I know but those are just silly rumors but now, this is for real! It's
official and you know what, Justin did it over the phone." He told me. He
sounds like one of our neighbors before who lives for gossips.

"What? That's awful!" I said before thinking. "Sorry about that!" I added
realizing that I was bashing his friend there. Whatever happens, JC and
Justin have already shared a friendship that survived with the test of
time. I even wonder sometimes why the two didn't become together.

"It's okay! It was actually our fault coz we were pressuring him for some
time to end the charade with Britney. But we never imagined that he's gonna
be so heartless that he's gonna do it over the phone and didn't have the
guts to tell her in person." JC explained to me. I guess he's also a little
ticked off with what Justin did, but who wouldn't?

"Maybe it's his way of dealing with it." I tried to defend Justin -- I
actually don't know why.

"Deal with what? It's not like he fell in love with him in the first
place. He did confess that he's just using her for publicity and no
emotional attachment whatsoever remember? And you know what, he seems worse
this time. It's like I don't know Justin anymore. He's taking up groupies
and he goes to strip clubs after the concerts and this is not the sweet and
innocent Justin I know." JC poured out his anguish with the Justin issue. I
wish I know what I can do but there's really nothing I can do.

"I'm sorry to hear that. I wish I can do anything." I tried to console
JC. But I wondered, am I responsible to this new Justin? This new attitude
surfaced when I sorta 'dumped' him after our date. Did it really make a big
impact in Justin that he's gonna change his whole self to a
self-destructing one?

"Kyle, you're not responsible about this." JC said to me like he read my
mind. "I know that you must be thinking that you cause all of this shit and
it's not. Justin is a normal person with a sound mind capable of making his
own decisions and the consequences are his to face as well." JC's word
seemed to be permeating to my mind but I just can't erase the guilt feeling
about Justin.

"Kyle, Matt wants to talk to you." Will said to me. I nodded at him and
waved my hands dismissing him.

"Jayce, I have to see my boss. I'll talk to you later, okay?" I told Josh.

"Sure. I love you." He said.

"I love you too." I answered and replaced the handset to its cradle. I
stood up and exited my cubicle to go to Matt's office. I tried to push the
thoughts that were clouding my mind at the moment. No guilt feeling with
Justin. No lonely feeling with Josh. Focus on work.

When I was situated in front of Matt's door, I raised my hand to knock on
the glass door that's covered by Venetian blinds. "Come in." I heard Matt
say from the other side. I pushed the door open and walked to Matt.

"You wanted to talk to me?" I asked him. I sat on the chair in front of his
table. He was signing a few pieces of paper and once he signed his final
sheet, he arranged them to a neat stack and faced me.

"Yeah, I do." He answered me with a smile. "I wanna talk to you about
this." He pushed a manila envelope to my direction. I picked up the
envelope and opened it. There were pieces of paper inside of it. "It's a
site project." He told me. I nodded and pulled out the content of the
envelope. In bold letters from the first page, it read ZOMBA.

"Zomba?" I asked him and he answered with a nod.

"I've been trying to get Zomba for a few weeks now and they finally
accepted my offer. It's gonna be a very big project; one of the biggest we
ever have and I want you to head this project. I trust you very much Kyle
and I know that you are one of the biggest talents out there so I know you
can handle this." He explained to me. I just looked at the papers in front
of me. It seems that Zomba is a big major record company that handles lots
of artists -- and I mean LOTS.

"All of this just to me?" I asked him. It seemed impossible coz it was a
huge number.

"Oh no! I talked with Mr. Reily, my contact in Zomba and we sorted out the
stuff that you'll handle and for the others, I'll leave it to the other
people here. The ones you'll handle will be the most important ones because
they're the major artists of Zomba and I tell you, this would be a lot
because you have to maintain not only a site for the States but for other
regions Zomba is affiliated to." He said to me. "The last sheet of paper
would be the artists you'll handle. They are only 4 acts but they have
different sites across the globe so it would be around 30 sites all in
all." He told me like it was the simplest task in the world.

"30?" I asked not believing it.

"That's why I wanted the work divided. They have lots of artists and only
these 4 have sites across the globe. I know you can do this." He told me. I
picked out the last sheet of paper that would state which acts I would work
with. My eyes bulged when I read it.

Aaron Carter Backstreet Boys Britney Spears NSYNC

"You're kidding me?" I said to him.

"I'm serious. So, are you gonna take it or leave it?" He asked.

"Of course I'm taking it!" I said to him ecstatic that I'm gonna work with
the biggest acts in the world. And NSYNC. And Josh!

"That's nice to hear but there are some things you have to know first." He
told me. "You'll not be working in here with that job. You'll be having
your office in the JIVE building, one of the subsidiary companies of Zomba
because it's one of the nearest here in Florida. You can go there tomorrow
so you'll know where it is and they also want a list of the equipment that
you'll need. They said that you can ask for anything." He grinned at me
when he said the last sentence. I can ask anything and I'm gonna be having
it for free! "You'll be sort of a Zomba employee coz you'll be the one
signing the contracts, not me so it's like a freelance thing for you but
you are still carrying our company's name. They'll be giving you a salary
and your salary here will be continued as well. Questions?" He filled me in
with the details that I should know at the moment.

"Um, anything else?" I told him still trying to grasp what is happening at
the moment. This is so big.

"Oh yeah, you might be spending some time with the artists, so traveling
will be part of your job." He told me. Matt just made me day and it was
like fate was behind me and supporting my relationship with Josh. It sounds
so freaky with this dropping on my lap but I'm not complaining one bit. "I
think that's all." He scratched his head prolly trying to think of anything
to tell me.

"Great! Thanks Matt. I won't let you down." I stood up and walked out still
clutching the envelope that carries my ticket out of this office and into
the Jive building, one step closer to JC. I walked back to my cubicle with
a silly grin still plastered on my face.

"I guess Matt told you some good news." Will commented. I just nodded at
him and immediately dialed JC's number. I was just excited that I have to
tell him about this!

It rang a few times until someone answered. "Chasez phone!" Someone said
but I know for a fact that it wasn't Josh.

"Um, can I talk to JC?" I asked politely.

"Can I know who's on the line?" The person asked me once more.

"It's Kyle." I replied. His voice is so familiar but I can't just place who
the owner of the voice was.

"Oh." He uttered. "Um, he's not here right now. I'll just tell him you
called him." That's weird. JC told me that he was on the bus going to
California and that's just 30 minutes ago, more or less. Then, it hit
me. This someone that I was talking with was Justin. Justin Timberlake.

"Oh, I see. Thanks Justin. I'll just phone him later." I said to him trying
to hide my little anger because I know that JC is available but he doesn't
want to give him the phone. "How are you, Justin?" I asked him trying to
reach out to Justin once more. I dunno why I still try to be friends with
him even if he shut me off a couple of times already.

"I'm just fine." He answered in his usual snotty way.

"I heard that you broke your relationship with Britney." I told him.

He didn't answer for a few seconds. "Yeah, I did. It was going nowhere so I
broke it off."

"I know that there's a girl, er, guy out there for you." I tried to be
optimistic with the situation. "You're a very handsome and amazing
guy. You'll be with someone again soon."

"I hope so." This is the first time Justin showed a glimpse of his
vulnerable side. When he said that, it was so small and so sad. "Hey Kyle,
I have to go somewhere. Talk to you next time." And he ended the call. He
didn't even let me say goodbye. I guess I hit a sore spot in him. I think
that he's just sad that he has no one and the last time he dated someone --
me -- he got dumped. But I do hope that he's gonna be happy.

--------------------
End of Chapter

You've just read the 14th installment of my series. I hope that you liked
what you read here. I also want to apologize for the delay of my stories
coz I'm trying to manage to write 3 different series so it's a tedious
process, plus, the heat here in the Philippines really induces a serious
writer's block for me! ~smiles~ Anyway, the next installment is being
written at the moment and it would be a little fun compared to this
chapter.

Did you watch Star Wars Episode 2? Well, I am totally having this major
crush with Hayden Christensen! ~sigh~ He's one major hottie in my list --
along with JC of course. ~smile~ Anyway, I'm gaining interest in Hayden's
persona and I want to include him in my series. Maybe, Justin's love
interest? What can you say about that???

Thanks to ALL of you who have taken the time and MAILED me! I truly
appreciate it very much. A big, big shout to my Danish pals, Chris and
Danny, I hope you always be in love forever coz you compliment each other
perfectly. You two are made for each other! :-)

PLEASE!!!! Send me feedbacks... I'm a feedback addict! I so love those
feedbacks. Short, long, good or bad, or just whatever... drop me a line
okay? I also have most of the IM programs out there and I'm usually on,
hopefully you can catch me.

AIM : pseud0ry
Yahoo! : yr_ry
MSN : yr_ry_@hotmail.com
ICQ : 156360427

Also, I'm usually in the boyband chatroom.

NEW Addie is: 
yr_ry_@hotmail.com

EMAIL me.

A big 'HI' to the people in the Nifty Boyband Chatroom and CRAZY!!! They
are so nice, especially Wes, Dru, CJ, Duckie, Strat, Clive, Jayson... and
the list goes on. Wanna say hi to my friend Byron who have helped me with
his support and his friendship! Stay strong in your relationship! Finally,
a big big 'thank you' to David who maintains the Nifty archives, without
him, we won't be reading any of the best slash fics in the world!

UPDATED. Also, here are my suggestions of other cool stories in the archive
that influenced me in my craft.

NSYNC Stories.
 + Jamie's Romance (Justin) 
 + JC's Hitchhiker (JC) 
 + Josh and Just (JC/Justin) 
 + Lance in Shining Armour (Lance) 
 + My New Life (Lance) 
 + Justin's Dark Angel (Justin) 
 + My Surprise Romance (Lance) 
 + JC Dreams (JC) 
 + My Soulmate JC (JC)
 + Love Thru Chat (JC/Justin, Lance) 
 + Life with Justin (Justin) 
 + Jimmy Needs Assistance (Lance) 
 + Lance, JC and an Astral Fan (Lance/JC) 
 + Lance's Search (Lance/JC) 
 + Like the Rain (Justin)
 + Time Stood Still (Justin)
 + Sans Vous, Je Suis Rien (Justin) 
 + Chance Meeting (Justin) 
 + Needing You (Lance/Eminem)
 + Justin and Redemption (Justin)

Backstreet Stories.
 + Because I Love You (Brian/Nick) 
 + Double Take (Brian, Nick) 
 + Bad Boy B-Rok (Brian) 
 + Heir to the Darkness (Brian/Nick) 
 + Kevin and Dustin (Kevin) 
 + French Kiss Me (Brian) 
 + Millennium Love (Brian) 
 + Forever (Kevin) 
 + Get Another Boyfriend (Kevin) 
 + Heir to the Darkness (Nick/Brian) 
 + Insecurities (Nick)
 + On the Streets (Kevin) 
 + Brian and Tommy (Brian) 

Crossover Stories.
 + Brian and Justin (Brian/Justin) 
 + The One (Brian/Justin) 
 + Mother Knows Best (Justin/Nick)
 + Living (Almost all of NSYNC, BSB and 98') --> found in www.matthewtime.com