Date: Sat, 5 Jun 2004 20:46:42 EDT
From: J
Subject: Peter Pan and Me--Chapter 38

Chapter 38: PREPARTIONS FOR THE FUTURE

"Rollin! What the hell do you think you're doing?!?!!?!"

Dear God! What if Peter came flying back through the window suddenly to
find us like this!? He'd be terribly jealous and he'd probably come close
to killing Rollin for doing this and who knows how he'd feel about me
doing an adult thing with one of our boys, not that I did. I had no idea
it was Rollin. I, in fact thought it was Peter. Should have known better.


"Huh?" Rollin raised his head from my lower regions and looked truly
confused, cum covering his lips and lower chin. "Oh, don't worry, I'll
clean you up. I don't want you to get all tired again so just wait and
I'll lick..."

"Rollin! Stop at once!" I turned red faced, embarrassed. I covered my
penis with my hands, "Get my...oh for Pete's sake!" I was bent upward
but still on my butt. My abs hosted a pool of white load. Rollin's lips
moved to them again. "Rollin, I said stop! I don't want you to!" I
carefully stood up so as not to spill cum on the wooden floor. Rollin had
already licked most of it up. I knew to not complicate matters that I had
to clean up fast so Peter wouldn't return from where ever the hell he was
and get overly angry.

Rollin sat there, befuddled as to why I was so upset. Clearly in his time
on 42nd street in the mid 80's, he never had any client who didn't want
sexual favors. "I...I...I just thought..."

"Uh, it's...it," I grabbed a rose and used it to clean myself. The
Never Roses had this wet tissue effect like a wipey. I was clean in
moments and I quickly did this with my back turned to Rollin, who was
staring at my ass now. Terrific. I scrambled up my denim ripped shorts
which I also had in the Tree House. I hate calling it Wendy's house but
truth was it was made for her. Bet she didn't think it would someday be
used for this. "Rollin..."

Rollin had tears in his eyes and dripping down soon. On his cheeks. His
face cheeks! Dirty minded readers. Anyway, he started blubbering. I had
always seen him as one of the toughest Lost Boys. After all he endured a
life with a horrid pimp, being thrown out a window on a third floor, drug
addiction, and who knows what else according to Peter and the other Lost
Boys and Rollin himself told me some stories that made me just cry. There
was even a guy who liked to piss on him. I knew he was sensitive though.
"I just thought that if Peter couldn't give you what you wanted....relief
you, you know, I just would give it to you. You seemed so sad and so..."
More sobbing. So that he could not talk.

I looked nervously out the window. Peter must have gone for some fruit to
eat or something and would be back any second. "It's..." I hesitated
but then moved to Rollin, kneeling down next to him and put one arm
around his back and the other on his left arm, "It's okay, Rollin." A
thought occurred to me, "Rollin, did Peter ask you to do this cause he
couldn't?"

"What?" Rollin blinked, "Oh no. I just thought that you were spending so
much time away from us and we missed you, that's all, I missed you. I
wanted to have you around us again, around me. I feel so safe when you're
around."

I never thought I'd hear that. I mean ME? I was so weak. Probably the
weakest of the Boys and Peter in so many ways. For one, I could never
survive life on the street like Rollin did or tribal warfare like Aoi did
or the Irish religion/anti England war like the twin...triplets did. I
was weakest among all of us I think. "Rollin, that's very...I didn't send
out any signals for you to do that, did I?"

Rollin thought about this. Just that fact worried me that I had. "Oh no.
No, I don't think so. No."

"Hmmmm, I'm sorry if I did." I was feeling more than a bit guilty. "We
won't mention this to..."

Rollin's eyes widened as if he hadn't thought this out, "PETER! Oh my
gosh! PETER! Fuck! Shit! Piss!" Rollin jumped back out of my grasp as if
he didn't want Peter seeing him in my arms. "If he finds this out, he
will...." Rollin gasped and sobbed, "I have to run away, get away from
Neverland. Will you help me?"

"Rollin," I laughed, "You don't have to do that."

"But I am so afraid of Peter."

Strange. In many ways, Peter was such a smaller boy. But in other ways
and at times even physically, he towered above all of us. Why was that?
Smaller but taller? Shorter and younger? I don't know. Peter was still a
stranger to me in so many ways.

"Peter Schmeter," I snarled, "He won't harm a hair on your head or
I'll..."

"He smacks us all the time, especially Landen and you do nothing."

I puffed. "Maybe...you're right but he won't do more than that."

"But you're not going to tell him are you?"

I wondered. "I..."

Rollin jumped on me, "You can't! Please don't tell him! I did it for him
as well as for you. I just wanted to make you feel release, relief and
get back to the way you were before, the way you felt about us and Peter
and to be our father again and to..."

"Rollin! Stop it! You're rambling! I admit it did help me in a
way...guilty as that makes me. But it's adult stuff and Peter might not
understand the impact of that anyway..."

"He will. He does. And he is smarter than he lets on! He's thinking as a
child but he knows. He's lived a long time. I know he knows. I see it in
his eyes."

If anyone could tell someone who was sexually aware, it was Rollin, who
spent so much time on 42nd street's sexual ...what's the word, depravity?
"You mean he just doesn't want to engage in it?"

"Yes," Rollin snapped. "If you tell him I will have to go. If I can,
he'll kill me!"

"Stop saying that!" I yelled and grabbed his shoulders. "He will NOT
kill you. I will see to that. I will stop him. Even if I have to kill him
or myself in the process and it will not come to that."

Rollin moved both our arms across his face to wipe tears, "Why not?"

"You didn't think about this too much or you wouldn't be this upset and
the fact is that he nor anyone else has to know about this. No one."

Little did I know that the fairy boy was listening from inside the
chimney. He laughed to himself and flew out the top, moving John's hat
slightly.

"Oh, okay." Rollin said.

"Are you okay now?" I asked him.

"I...I am." He really was not I could tell.

"Please don't worry. And...."

"What?"

"Clean yourself up quick!" I realized Rollin was nude this whole time
and his penis slit was dripping with white pearly cum. "Hurry it up."

Rollin used a rose too and then put on his skimpy loin cloth. "I...I'm
sorry."

"Don't be. You were doing this out of love and caring. And I get that.
But next time think about it a lot more than you did."

"I will." Rollin's tears were gone but threatened to come back as the
crack in his voice revealed. He turned to leave but I stopped him by
calling out his name.

"And Rollin?..."

"Yeah?" He turned to me.

"Thanks." I smiled.

Rollin smiled back at me. "Now I better go before Peter comes..."

"BACK!!!!" Peter made one of his startling entrances by floating at the
window, horizontally, his luscious body behind him and up a bit, his arms
full of fruits and his face not more than half in inch from Rollin's
face.

Rollin jumped and turned at the same time, bumping into Peter's arms and
the fruit fell, some inside the window, some outside. The fruit that fell
inside, split and yellow juice flew out and cummed on the floor. Rollin
gasped. Peter dove for some of the fruit that fell and caught it. Rollin
looked at me wide eyed, a lump in his throat. I motioned for him to be
quiet with a finger to my mouth and then I put a finger to his mouth,
moving across the room to him. What the hell did Peter think anyway? Lost
Boys were almost always dressed half nude or nude. Didn't the think they
would form some kind of needs? Sexual needs? I guess he didn't. And
finding Rollin here with me didn't even make him suspect anything. He
came to the window like a child.

"I saved all the fruit, not one hit the ground."

He lied. One did. I found it later.

Peter rambled on, almost like Rollin was rambling earlier, "I had to
fight the yellow backed grizzly bear to get these! There was stabbing,
slicing, clawing...."

I saw some of this to be true from the tell tale signs of claw marks on
Peter's back and shoulder.

"And blood and killing and I slew the bear."

This angered me. "Oh come on Peter, why'd you do that?"

"For you to have breakfast."

"I hate killing of animals, you know that!"

"Hullo Rollin!" Peter ignored me, "Want some fruit too?"

"Rollin? Me?" Rollin said and Peter made a "you're acting strange" face
with his eyebrows. "Oh yeah. I'm looking for something to eat. I have
this bad taste in my mouth."

I rolled my eyes. As Rollin greedily munched on a mango, Peter took out a
banana and looked at me with that devil may care look, big smile,
eyebrows moving up and down, sometimes out of order or out of sync with
each other. What was he saying to me with this? He undid the skin and
threw it out the window without so much as a last look, then put the end
of the banana in his mouth and the other end sticking out like a...well,
you get the idea. I smiled and went wide eyed but tried not to show my
eyes that wide so I closed them as I approached his mouth. I took the
other end of the banana, which smelled so good and tasted so good, into
my mouth. I let my lips slide along it. Peter ate the end of his banana
and moved it into his mouth some and chewed some more, until he met my
mouth and the banana between us, threatened to choke me until I bit some
and swallowed. Peter kissed me, swallowing the rest.

Rollin was getting bashful just by being there and seeing us. He'd seen
plenty of kinky things in his time but he was ashamed because we were his
make believe parents and he didn't want Peter to know what he had just
done, which was fresh on his mind. "Oh, I'll just, I'll just get...going
then...." Rollin knew we were ignoring him so he grabbed handful of
fruits and took off out the window.

Peter kissed me tightly and squeezed me hard. My arms were locked inside
his grasp. "Peter...."

"Yeah?" I felt his body solid against mine. My dick jumped again. I
was ready to cum again. My body hurt, he held me so close and to sight.
My stomach was pressed against his so that I could feel our navels
intermingling. I became wet and not just on my neck and where ever Peter
kissed me. Peter kissed my neck and shoulders and chest but was holding
me so tight again. He was so much stronger than he looked and believe me,
he looked strong. He was small to be sure, at one time he was smaller
than all his lost boys. But his muscles, especially on his back and arms
and neck and shoulders were big for a boy his age. And he was so
comforting by holding me and I felt a part of him but...

"I can't breath..."

"Huh?"

"I can't.....breath."

Peter let me go, "Oh sorry! I get carried away!"

I laughed as I recovered my breath, "T'okay." I smiled and hugged him
tightly now. His arms were down to his side so I had him in my grasp now.
"I'll just return the favor!"

Peter smiled but raised his arms and got loose real fast. "Can't catch
me!" Peter looked down at my crotch. "Those are getting small for you?"

"Uh? I don't know. I haven't noticed. They have shrunk in the rain. Or
the snow. We've had so much of it lately."

"Catch me then!" Peter flew out the window too.

What's he on about? Did he notice my raging seven inch hard on, which
felt like stone. Between us it felt like metal. I swallowed. "Peter,
where are you?" Did he even want me to get engorged that way? Was it
too adult for him? He must know what it was. "Peter, do you?" I opened
the door and flew out the civil way. Outside, I turned around to face the
house, "Peter?" He was no where to be found.

Suddenly, Dumbo flew up alongside Tantor, Peter straddling them both,
standing with legs spread apart. In between those legs? What happened?
What was there? I knew his dick to be huge and thick and fat and lovely.
But what did it ever do, I wondered. "You need a cooling down between
there!" The elephants sprayed me with water and as I yelled Peter's
name in frantic panic, I was slammed against the closed door of the
Little House and the wood almost broke. Water hit me in my crotch and
splayed all over my face from the washing. "Peter!!!!!MFFFPPPPH!" I
landed on a branch, which met my crotch and hurt.

Peter was laughing the entire time. I landed on my feet, my hair
dripping. My denim shorts open at the long ago lost button spot. I made a
mad face and pursed my lips together. Peter laughed and landed with the
elephants. "They told me what you did when I was gone. It was amazing! I
thought I'd do the same..."

I spat out water, "That was to stop the fires Seth set!"

"Sure!" Peter said innocently and then not so innocently added, "And I
put out a fire I just started between your..."

"Peter sometimes I could just kill you!"

Peter threw his head to the side and laughed, "Ha! Someone beat you to
it!"

I snorted and picked up a banana and threw it at him but he caught it in
his mouth, end in there just like before. He ate it without peeling the
skin! "Oh gross!"

Peter laughed, "That's what boys sometimes are, gross!" He chided me and
stuck his chin out and hit the elephant's backsides so they would go off
on their own adventures.

"I know. And I love them for it but you I love for everything about you."

"Oh no," Peter said, "Do I need to get them back here so that thing of
yours doesn't adult up on me again?"

"You know you like it."

"I do?"

"I do."

"I do."

"I long to hear those words."

"Enough!" Peter snapped and flew off.

I was confused. What was it about me and him? He and I? Did he just want
it both ways? And what did I want? My adult life sucked before Peter,
but now that I met someone that I could be with in every way, I guess I
wanted to have some of those adult things I formerly lacked. But Peter
didn't want adult life nor was he sure about sex and love and feelings. I
think he was more sure of them than he was when Wendy was with him. But
what about me? Was sex---- worth risking losing Peter or hurting him
over? Was growing up? Damned if I knew cause I never had sex before. The
fantasy of it could be better than the real thing. With Peter? Nah. It
would be better than the real thing or the fantasy combined. For that's
what he was. Reality and fantasy combined. Love. Pure Love. Pure boy.
Pure....but also sorta mischievous. And what is more mischievous than the
height of what all boys want? Sex? Sex is the height of all boy play I
think. I was getting a headache. I sneezed. "Peter, I get a cold from
this before we have to go the Kensington Wedding, I will...."

Peter was behind me and snapped, "DO WHAT?!!!"

I jumped and fell forward, "Peter, don't do that?" I snapped as I pulled
myself up, luckily having my hands out to prevent me from falling mouth
to dirt.

Peter came up behind me and hugged me and put his front to my back. I
felt his manhood if that what I could call it, against my lower back. He
lacked nothing it seemed. He's not missing anything is he? I swallowed
and hoped Peter would not notice my own reviving penis head poking up my
denim ripped shorts. Damn, I've got to get bigger clothes. Or just wear
my loin cloth, then it wouldn't matter much since that covered hardly
anything. "I was only kidding. Right now, you need to prepare the boys
for the arrival of Queen Mab."

"Me?"

"But you're the one who knows her best. I hardly know anything about
her."

"You've read about her?" He let go of me and turned to face me, bending
as if he were about to play a game of hide and seek.

"Well yeah and..."

"And told stories about her?"

"Yeah!" I said, aggravated.

"Then ready them and tell them to be good boys for her and her only. If
not, she'll..."

"What?"

"...probably turn them into something slimy or non living." He took my
wrists and swung his arms with them and let go and grabbed my legs and
flipped me backward.

I landed and I sucked in air as he took my wrists again. I puffed out my
chest as he let go of me and said, "Okay."

"Good, after all, you are their mother," he flew off again but this time
waited and turned in the air to see my reaction. He knows I hate it when
he calls me mother. "Come along, mother."

Three nights and forty adventures later it seemed, it was daytime and
Queen Mab was about to arrive. I had kept the boys up a long time to
practice for her arrival and keep their good manners in good stead. It
took a long time. Rollin, Aoi, Pare, and Rico were the most difficult.
They had what I call attitude. They also loved mischief. In that respect
they took after their father: Peter Pan. Bailey could go either way, for
if he liked you, he would behave most excellently. If he didn't like you
he could be more of a handful than Rollin, Aoi, Pare, and Rico all put
together. Fortunately, Bo and even Barry sometimes, could calm the whole
lot of them and with help from the calmer Jennie, the mute boy, things
were somewhat balanced. But none of them seemed to like both of us going
away for long. They hated when we left Neverland to stop Seth. I guess
another thing about boys or children is that they are sometimes
overwhelmingly selfish. Me included. For I wanted and needed this time
alone with Peter without some dire fate for the universe or the world or
Neverland or just the afternoon being spoiled happening. Does that make
sense? Anyway, I made believe I was Queen Mab at given points and the
boys failed miserably at putting jackets down in the mud for "her",
really for me. For they had no jackets to put down and I fell into a mud
hole and had to be pulled out by Peter, who laughed considerably. I did
an improvised bed time as Queen Mab might have done. The boys ignored me.
Then I slipped into my mode as Chase and they listened...but not much.
They nearly broke the bed when the all landed on it at the same time,
from a hover mode. The fairy boy was hiding through most of this in a
rock hole in the underground home and he hated noise so he kept a boulder
over it as a door blockade. I can't say I blamed him. We practiced dinner
time and no one came. When Sole came, he tripped over a wire set by Rico
and fell into the table, spilling everything on it and throwing the bowls
high in the air, to land on the heads of the triplets. This made Bailey
mad at Sole and Rico, and they started a food fight in which I got hit in
the face with oatmeal and porridge. Peter was mad since it was the last
of the porridge given to him by the Three Bears of Goldilocks fame. That
was when Peter called an end to it. He would play Queen Mab. That was
when the boys did a fake arrival and were courteous, kind, and giving.
They gave "her", her being Peter, flowers. Peter in his role as Queen
Mab, put on a female voice just like the fairy Queen, "Oh thank you my
kind sirs."

They held her cape for her. They took her makeup kit for her. They put
down jackets that they made for her when it was time for her to cross
mud. Peter flew over the mud but made it look like he walked over the
jacket, he being partial to keeping in play mode. "Do not spoil the play
or you shall hands severely knuckled." What ever that meant. Once
before, I had to slap his cheek when he tried to hit my knuckles. It had
to do with something that I was not playing right in. I think I was
supposed to be Cheetah to his Tarzan. Or Marion to his Robin. Fuck that
shit. I mean I'd rather be Boy or that kid in Robin Hood who was hung.
Without the being hung part. Anyway, the point is that they were much
better for Peter. Peter kicked Rico in the behind when Rico tried to set
up a wire trip to knock over Sole again, this time trying to also draw
Pare into falling over it. Rico fell and apologized by kissing Peter's
dirty heels. Peter just let him, with a face on that made me want to
smack HIM. He was so coy sometimes. It was as if he were saying "Take
your punishment Rico, you did a bad thing."

At bed time, I folded my arms and refused to lay in the bed with all of
them. Not that I minded all of them, I constantly slept with them all in
the same bed. It was that on that one night, as Peter played Queen Mab,
they all daintily went to bed without a fuss, without a so much as a "can
I get a drink" or "I'm scared, put on some more torches" or even a "Bed
time already? May I brush my teeth first?" Or "I want to watch a story
from you?" They all wore their best night clothes, long shirts like
John and Michael wore a long time ago and they were all naked underneath.
Dongs shaking in the wind. Which there was none of. The wind I mean. All
were asleep by the time I stood at the foot of the bed, arms crossed and
impertinent. Peter was in the middle of them and had this conceited look
on his face, that just made me turn red. Then I just smiled, "Oh the mean
ness of you."

"It's authority," he said, out loud and no one woke up, or maybe they
were already up and pretending to be asleep so as not to have their ears
twinged by Peter or boxed by him. He shut his eyes as if to say, I can do
it in my sleep, when soon he was asleep. I shook my head and climbed over
the boys to him and laid on his body and fell asleep myself not long
after.

This took up the better part of the three days. On the last day, the late
afternoon Mab was to come, I was in the forest teaching them how to walk
behind Mab as she flew or walked. They were doing well. "Okay that's
about all. Now I think Mab is a vegetarian so you cannot eat meat around
her. By the way, you all know I hate that anyway. Killing animals is
horrid, perfectly."

"She's a vetinarian?" Bo asked. He talked more now. "Does that mean she
works with animals so we can't eat them?"

"No, silly," Barry said to him, nudging him in the ribs with an elbow,
"It means she's old, like a genitarian."

Aoi bit his lip and said, puzzled, "That means she had genitals, right?"

Sigh.

"No, of course not, she's a girl," Peter said. "Only boys have those."

Hmmmm. He was lagging behind the others, keeping a watch on them for me
as they followed me. Landen looked, "An arian? Don't they work in a
library? Like my mother used to."

"Your mother is there!" Peter yelled.

"Oh yeah, I meant my real mother."

Smack. "Don't break down in your make believe."

"Yes Pea...father."

Smack.

Landen, of course didn't really remember his mother but she might indeed
have worked in a library. I felt it in my bones. He tried so hard to be
studious.

Sole got into the mix of mixed up boy talk. "No, dear Landen. Aryan's are
like my race. Blond, blue eyed...from like Germany and Norway and that
kind of place."

Sigh.

"Any way, do not kill any animals."

They all, including Peter, moaned a moan of disappointment.

I went on, "I mean it. I do not want any animals killed for sport, for
hunting, and for eating."

Peter nodded, "But Chase, God put animals on Earth for us to eat."

"And I understand that frame of thinking. But here they are so graceful
and so kind...."

Little did I know as I spoke in defense of animals, a giant NeverBear, a
big red covered bear, with red claws and a white stripe down the middle
of his head with it continuing down his back and tail, was behind the
tree I was infront of, my back to it. A claw came round the tree. This
thing was as big as a grizzly and just as territorial and ferious.

I went on, "I mean it, I want no one to kill any animals from this very
moment until we return and even then some! I want your words on it!"

"Give it!" Peter said. They did, even though they saw the monster bear
coming up on me from behind, the cretins. I supposed this was another
game for Peter. Or maybe a test for me from him. Could I fend off this
beast sneaking up behind me.

I saw Aoi undo his bow and arrow and put an arrow in the bow. "What are
you doing, Aoi? You can't have that happen when the Queen is here...."

Aoi was stunned and sweating in fear, "I...I. butt...butt...."

"Butt?" I put one hand on my left cheek on my ass.

Aoi continued, "Butt....you...you you've got a bear behind!!!!"

I put both hands on my ass cheeks, "Oh no. Have these damned denim shorts
ripped again? I shall have to get something to cover...." My hands did
not find bear ass but as I turned, I saw the giant towering mass of fur,
claws, and teeth on its hind legs. It rose up above me and its teeth
bared, put its face down at my own. It was about to put my head into its
mouth!

The play Peter Pan and its characters are trademarks of and copyright
J.M.Barrie.