Date: Thu, 8 Mar 2007 16:47:23 -0800 (PST)
From: L meehan <ms.meehan@yahoo.com>
Subject: Roman's Customizing - Chapter 20

Jim didn't have good news for Matt. He informed him that legally he lived
in Pennsylvania and would need to return home and file his petition there.
Most likely because there were no mitigating circumstances, his mother
would have to consent to emancipation.  He went on to explain to him that
Matt would have to prove he was able to support himself.  By the time Matt
got off the phone with Jim, he was more depressed than ever.

>From what he understood he fit none of the criteria for successfully
gaining his emancipation.  He couldn't see having to wait two years to
legally move out and be with Joe. Staying in Indianapolis would just make
trouble for himself and his brother.  Jim had promised to help make
arrangements for Joe to come back to Philly and find a physical therapy
facility nearby.  Matt went to his job distracted. As much as Joe had
protested, he knew he'd be disappointed to hear he was leaving. It felt to
Matt like if he left, somehow he'd never see Joe again.

By the time he made it to the hospital, Matt put on his game face and tried
to give a positive spin to the dismal news he'd been contemplating all day
long.  He started with Jim's offer to help.  Since Joe knew nothing about
his plans to become independent, Matt didn't bother to share the bad news.

"I'll be going home at the end of the week.  I told my manager and I think
she's going to give me something extra as a going away present." Matt
attempted to sound cheery.

Joe smiled and reached his hand out to him. "You know I don't want you to
go, right?"

Matt nodded his answer for fear he'd break down trying to get the one tiny
word out.

"We'll be together again real soon, I promise."

Matt forced a smile and tried to believe his brother's words.  The rest of
the evening they sat in silence, holding hands, breaking only when a nurse
of some other hospital staffer needed access to Joe.  Matt returned to the
empty apartment Jim paid for and collapsed on the sofa.  He needed to start
packing, buy a souvenir or two for Andy, Lou and Lloyd.  He needed to gear
himself up to face his mother and deal with the reasons he'd been sent away
in the first place.  He needed to think of his future, a future he couldn't
imagine without Joe.  The weight of everything, Joe's accident, his own
mistakes with his friend Jim, returning home, began to suffocate him.  He
wondered if Joe had been bearing all the weight of their relationship all
this time and had felt the same way.  He felt selfish for never considering
what all this was doing to his brother.  He'd been so concerned with his
own feelings, it never occurred to him that Joe had feelings too. Perhaps,
he thought, a separation was in order.

Matt fell into a restless sleep right there on the sofa; his subconscious
mind pondering painful realities that his conscious mind wouldn't dare.  He
woke to the distant sound of the alarm clock ringing in his bedroom.  He
stumbled to the room and turned the thing off.  He didn't know why, but he
dialed his mom.

Claire was stunned to say the least to hear from her son.  He sounded weary
and at that moment she wished she were there to hold him and care for him.
He was still her baby.

"Mom, I'm sorry," he broke down and cried.  "I messed up."

"I'm sorry too," was Claire's tearful reply.  "I'm not angry at you for
being gay.  It was just the shock and the way I found out was..."

"I know, I know," Matt rushed to cut her off.  He didn't want to relive
that nightmare again. "I didn't mean for you to...I don't love Jim and I
can't face him."  Matt knew that was only partly true.  He didn't love the
boy but he could deal if he had to see him again.

"I've been thinking," Claire began.

"Me too," Matt answered, summoning the courage to ask one more time to stay
with Joe.

"Joe's going to need help during his recovery," Claire began.  "The garage
is doing well and for once we have a little extra so..."

For the first time since Joe's accident, Matt was feeling hopeful.

"I was thinking of granting Joe temporary guardianship."  Claire paused
while her son thanked her profusely.  "There are a few conditions."

Matt held his breath, squeezing his eyes shut as he listened to his mom
speak.

"I'm coming out there with your school transcripts and getting you into a
high school nearby.  Joe's friend Jim called me and we talked at length
about the ways you could stay with your brother. I think he was right when
he suggested that until he could be moved, Joe needs to be with family."

Matt was ecstatic that Jim had intervened for him. He wanted to shower the
man he'd once been jealous of with a thousand kisses.  Matt tried to
concentrate, his mom was still talking.

"He told me he secured and apartment for you and I insisted on paying him
back. My conditions are, if grant Joe temporary custody, you stay in
school, get good grades and make arrangements to pay back the money I paid
Jim. I know you have a job but I don't want it to interfere with your
school work.  I want you to learn to be responsible.  Joe is going to need
someone who can take care of themself and him at the same time.  Do you
think you're up to it?"

"Yes," Matt said enthusiastically, nodding his head wildly even though
Claire couldn't see him.

"I'm coming on Friday and bringing Andy with me.  Jim has drawn up the
papers and is going to meet me.  Make arrangements with your boss to take
the day off because we have several schools to visit."

Matt couldn't stop thanking his mother.  He didn't stop to wonder how much
of her decision was based on not being able to deal with him no matter how
much she said she understood and accepted his lifestyle.  It didn't matter.
He was going to be with Joe.  He hurried and got ready for work.  His first
order of business was to see if he could secure a spot in the evenings
after school.  He had a learner's permit but he needed a license. He was
happily making plans in his head.  Joe was going to be his guardian but
more importantly, he was going to be Joe's.