Date: Tue, 17 Feb 2004 13:18:18 -0800 (PST)
From: Author James <authorjames2002@yahoo.com>
Subject: The Shadow Chapter 15 Suddenly

Disclaimer: This story is a work of fiction.  I do not know the sexual
orientation of any of the celebrities who will be appearing in the story.

WARNING: The character does not have a happy life and will not have very
many happy events in his life.  If this kind of stuff bothers you, I do not
recommend reading.  Otherwise, enjoy.

The Shadow created by Street and Smith, Walter B. Gibson.  Copyright
Advance Magazine Publishing Inc.

Author's email address: authorjames2002@yahoo.com

Chapter 15 Suddenly

	After rescuing O-Town, the Shadow headed to the alley where he
changed back into his street clothes.  As he leaned against the wall taking
deep breaths and contemplating the battle, the door opened and Jacob came
out.  The youth turned to leave Jacob alone but was noticed by Jacob.
	"Don't go," Jacob said.
	"What?"
	"I said don't go, unless you really, really have to.  I'd like it
if you stayed, though.  I'd like to talk if you don't mind."
	The youth hesitated.  "I guess I could stay a minute."
	Slowly he turned around.  He was waiting for Jacob to be shocked by
the ugliness that was him.  After the way Jacob seemed to sing to him
earlier, he believed Jacob would feel mistaken about his identity, or, at
the worst, feel deceived.  When he came about full faced, however, he did
not get the reaction he expected.
	"It is you," Jacob said, "from the concert."
	"Yeah," he replied.
	"Wow.  Imagine actually meeting you."
	"Yeah," he said again.
	"So, who were you there with?"
	"What do you mean?"
	"Your boyfriend?"
	"My boyfriend?  What makes you think I'm gay?"
	"Honestly, how many straight guys come to an O-Town concert?  If
the guy is with his girlfriend, he isn't into the music.  If the guy isn't
with his girlfriend and is into the music, chances are he likes men."
	"But I wasn't into the music."
	"Not in a great way.  Maybe you're the shy type," Jacob said with a
smile, his pun referring to the song he sang earlier.
	The youth just looked at him and then away.
	"I hope that didn't offend you," Jacob said apologetically as he
reached his hand out trying to be comforting.  "I didn't mean to.  If it
makes it any easier, I'm gay, too."
	The youth's heart jumped, but quickly settled down.  'It just means
he's someone who is within reach, yet not.'
	"Why me?" the youth asked.
	"What?" Jacob said.
	"Why did you direct that song toward me?"
	"From what I could see in the dimmed light, you looked cute."
	"And now that you see me a bit better, you realize I'm not," the
youth shot back in a sarcastic, angry tone.
	"No," Jacob quickly responded.  "I didn't...that came out wrong.
What I mean is, now that I see you in a better light, I think you are even
more attractive."
	"Are you blind or something?" he stated.  "I'm not attractive at
all.  My face is just plain ugly."
	"Let me see," Jacob said stepping closer.  He reached up and
lightly touched the youth's face.  At first the youth jumped, not being
used to anyone else's touch.  Then he allowed Jacob to continue.  His
fingers traced over his eyes lightly.  "You have two eyes.  That's a good
thing.  Not that people who are blind or only have one eye are bad.  But I
don't see three eyes or seven."
	Jacob stared into his eyes for a moment.  "And they are a nice dark
color.  I like them."  His fingers traced over the young man's ears.  "And
you have two ears.  You have a nose, and a mouth," Jacob said and his
fingers ever so gently caressed the youth's lips.
	The youth backed away frightened and uncomfortable by this
touching.
	"Sorry if I over stepped my bounds."
	The youth just looked away.  Then he said, "You probably want sex."
	"What?" Jacob said.  "No, no it isn't like that.  I've had sex.  It
isn't that big of deal.  Well, actually, it is, but that's not...Sex isn't
the reason I'm here right now.  Sex isn't the reason I'm talking to you.
We both seem like two guys trying to make it in this world.  You retreat
into yourself it seems by the way you are reacting now.  I put on a mask
and perform as someone else."
	'You'd be surprised,' the youth said to himself.
	"But I think we've got a shot at becoming close, and maybe helping
each other.  What's your name?"
	"Jacob!" someone called from the other side of the door.
	"Just a minute," Jacob said.  He turned back to the youth.  "What's
your...?"
	The youth was halfway down the alley.
	The door opened and Ashley came out.  "What's up?" he asked Jacob.
"You okay?"
	"I'm fine."
	Ashley looked in the direction Jacob was looking.  "Ah, you found
someone.  Were you two just finishing up?"
	"No," Jacob said a bit angrily.  "We weren't 'just finishing up'.
It's the guy from the concert earlier."
	"Oh, the guy you thought was cute in a quirky kind of way."
	"Yeah, him."
	"Imagine you actually getting to meet him again.  Can you even
begin to calculate the odds?"
	"Not really."
	"So, are you two going out on a date?"
	"Not yet.  He doesn't seem interested."
	"What?" Ashley said in disbelief.  "How many guys would jump at the
chance to have dinner with and fuck Jacob?  And he doesn't seem interested?
That's crazy!"
	"It's not like that any more," Jacob replied.  "I'm not going to
hop into bed like I used to.  And with those guys I thought there was a
real chance.  Evidently I was wrong.
	"But this guy, he seems like a possibility.  I could sense
something different about him in the concert.  I've got to meet him again."
	"Maybe you will.  I mean, the chances of you two meeting like you
just did kind of gives you the favor of happening again.  Come on.  We
should get in."

	The youth returned to the gym and his room and sat on the bed, his
hear beating miles a minute.  'What just happened?' he thought.  'I could
have been deceived like with Dhani and Amit, when I thought they liked me.
But I made sure that I wasn't reading Jacob wrong.  It turns out he made
sure I wasn't getting the wrong message.  For whatever reason, he actually
thinks I'm cute.  Was he high?  Drunk?  Forget his contacts or something?'
	A knock came at the door.  Then it opened and Jonesy poked his head
in.  "Are yo okay?"
	"I'm fine," the youth replied.
	"You came in awfully quick.  I thought something might have
happened at the concert."
	The young man took a deep breath.  "Something sort of did happen."
	"What?" Jonesy said stepping in the room.
	"One of the singers of the group came on to me."
	"You've got to be shitting me?  They all seem like they like pussy.
I never thought that one would like men.  Which one is it?  The blonde
one?"
	"No.  Jacob, the one with the dreadlocks."
	The trainer chuckled a little.  "So when are you going out?"
	"We're not."
	"Why not?"
	"I don't want to."
	"Why don't you want to?  You are a nice guy, though a bit on the
strange side.  And a nice man wants to go out with you.  He could save you
from this life of poverty and loneliness.  You can't build a life like
this."
	Jonesy stormed out of the room leaving the Shadow with his
thoughts.
	'Tomorrow, I'll go down to the hotel and, if he, after seeing me,
wants to go on a date, I'll go.'

	The next morning, the Shadow awoke.  He stretched, worked out and
then showered; his normal routine.  Then, he dressed and went down to the
hotel where he knew the guys were staying.  Nervously, he went up to the
desk and asked the hotel receptionist for the room Jacob Underwood was
staying in.  The receptionist looked at the young man incredulously, as if
wondering why the youth would even attempt to see Jacob.
	"I talked with him last night.  If you tell him that I saw him in
the alley last night, he will know me."
	Reluctantly the receptionist called the room and told the one on
the other end what the Shadow told her.  Then she hung up and looked a
little surprised.  "He said he will be right down.  Have a seat over
there."  She motioned to a small area with couches and he went over.
	Most of the people in the hotel eyed him.  He knew they marveled at
his ugliness.  Who didn't any more?  He just picked up a magazine and
thumbed through it waiting for Jacob to show up.
	"You came to see me," Jacob said.
	"Uh, yeah," the youth said hesitantly.  He felt as if he were being
judged by the way people looked at him and Jacob.  The youth noticed Jacob
just staring at him, which only added to the uncomfortability factor.  "And
now that you see me in daylight, you're freaked by my ugliness."
	The youth turned to go but was stopped by Jacob's hand grasping his
arm.  "No, that's not it at all."  Jacob looked around and saw the other
hotel patrons looking at him.  "Let's go talk somewhere a bit more
private."  And the singer led the youth into one of the auditorium's not
being used.
	"Before you say anything," Jacob said when they got to the stage,
"I didn't bring you in here because I didn't want others to see you with
me.  I brought you in here so we could have some privacy."
	"How did you know I was going to say that?"
	"Because you have this whole 'I'm-not-worthy' thing going on about
you, and I knew that would be what would come into your mind."
	"Honestly, Jacob, I'm not worthy.  Look at me.  I'm ugly."
	"I don't see someone ugly when I look at you.  I see a very
attractive person.  I don't see why you are so down on yourself.  I wonder
what could have happened to you to make you doubt who you are."
	"It's called rejection based on my looks."
	"Then those people are the unlucky ones," Jacob said as he reached
up to touch the young man's face as he did before.  "You are a worthwhile
person.  And I'm going to prove it to you."
	The door to the auditorium opened up and Ashley entered.  "Jacob!
Come on!  We've got to go!"
	"I'll be right there," Jacob replied.  Then he turned back to the
youth.  "Listen, I want to go out with you, on a date, tonight.  I think if
you had the right atmosphere, you would feel better about yourself.  We'll
have dinner, maybe a nice romantic walk through the park, it'll be fun!"
	"Uh, I don't know."
	"Come on!  It will be great!  You don't have to do anything except
show up!  What have you got to lose?"
	The youth thought about this for a moment.  'Maybe this is a sign
that I've done what I'm supposed to do.  Maybe I have forgiveness for what
I did.  Maybe this is my reward for the penance I've served.  Maybe that's
how it happens.  One minute you're an evil person who has committed a crime
and suddenly, you're absolved of the crime.  Suddenly, you're allowed to be
alive and enjoy life again.'

To Be Continued...