Date: Sun, 29 Apr 2001 15:14:04 -0000
From: WWF Kaientai <wwfevilkaientai@hotmail.com>
Subject: Jeff Hardy & Crash Holly's Ultimate Match

*** This is a 100% fictional story of two performers from the World
Wrestling Federation ***

Jeff Hardy checked his watch. 8pm. He was horny and needed someone, but it
was getting late. The WWF were in New York and most of the guys were out
partying. Jeff had hurt himself on the latest house show when hitting his
Swanton Bomb. He and his brother Matt had beaten Edge and Christian. Jeff
had pinned Christian with the Swanton, but had suffered a strained muscle in
his neck when doing it. Jeff put the ice pack down and turned off the TV. He
decided he was getting laid tonight. But who'd be free? Triple H was
probably with Stephanie, who he was fucking. Although no one knew, Hunter
was fucking Jeff too. Jeff had won the WWF Intercontinental Title from
Triple H a few weeks before and held it for a week. Although Jeff didn't
know for sure, he suspected it was Hunter's reward for a great night the
Wednesday before. He had lost the title back to Hunter the next week, but
was now a more important figure in the WWF. Jeff picked up his keys and
headed out.

The Janiero seemed empty tonight. Jeff entered and sat at a vacant table. No
one seemed to recognize him thankfully, although a good looking blond girl,
who couldn't be any older than 22, was looking his way. Jeff flashed her the
best smile he could produce and she blushed. He knew Sean Waltman (X-Pac)
and Matt Bloom (Albert) were here somewhere, but he wasn't really interested
in those guys and Matt was definitely straight. He didn't know about Sean,
but the two rarely spoke anyway. Jeff peered over the bar, his eyes scanning
the tables. He was about to give up when he saw Sean and Matt on a table
with K-Kwick, Crash Holly and Molly Holly. Jeff felt a wave of longing hit
him. Crash and K-Kwick were both hot. Crash had one of the cutest asses Jeff
had seen, but he hadn't seen Crash nude, even in the shower. K-Kwick was a
smooth black guy who had only entered the WWF late last year. He was a
genuinely nice guy, but Jeff had seen his girlfriend so had ruled him out.
He hadn't seen Crash with any chicks, but had heard tales of his exploits
with ring rats. Jeff stood up and headed over there.

"Hey Jeff!" shouted Sean, who reeked of beer. He was already pissed and
speaking overly loud. Jeff greeted the others and sat down, listening in.
They were talking about tonight's show. X-Pac and Justin Credible had beaten
The Dudley Boys and Sean let everyone know it. Sean was good friends with
Triple H, so Jeff always acted polite to him, even if he was a jerk. The
discussion moved to sex, with Sean making light jokes with Molly. Molly
smiled slightly awkwardly, obviously not wanting to hear Sean's drunken
ramblings. Sean reached over and touched a breast, causing Molly to let out
a small cry of surprise. "Cut it out Sean!" exclaimed Albert, who despite
his tough guy appearance, was one of the friendliest backstage. "Fuck you,
Alf," Sean said in reply. "Alf" was a nickname for Albert because he was so
hairy and he didn't like it. Albert stood up and took a few steps back,
looking pissed off. He said sternly, "Sean, it's time you headed off. We've
got a six man tag tomorrow with Pete.". Sean responded, "Didn't you hear me,
Matt? Fuck you! Don't tell me what to do motherfucker!". Albert rushed over
there, accidentally knocking a glass of wine on to Molly. He picked Sean up
by the scruff of the neck and pulled him over Crash and out of his seat.
Albert cast an apologetic look at Molly and dragged X-Pac out of the bar.

"Really, I'm alright guys!" said Molly, wiping the wine off her black pants.
Crash, K-Kwick and Jeff were fussing about the spillage. Jeff would have
kicked Sean's ass himself, but that could have gotten him fired. "Suit
yourself, girl," said K-Kwick, smiling. "It's gettin' late so I'm outta
here," he said and followed with his farewell's. He left, leaving Jeff,
Crash and Molly to chat the night away. Molly and Crash discussed tomorrow's
match, where Crash was probably going to lose to Rhyno yet again. Rhyno was
a cool guy, but had very little talent at all. His size, or rather his bulk,
are what got him his push. Crash had a bandaged around his upper left arm,
probably the result of another careless tackle by Rhyno. Jeff just sat back,
offering the occasional comment when prompted. He looked at Crash as much as
possible without being obvious, and thankfully was able to keep himself
"soft". After another half hour of discussion, Molly said, "Well guys, it's
my bed time. See ya tomorrow." She winked and headed out. Jeff realized what
this meant and felt a pang of nervousness hit him. Crash took a mouthful of
beer. He had a drinking problem and had been punished for getting drunk a
few months early, not appearing on TV for a while. He seemed sober today,
with only a couple of empty bottles before him.

"... Benoit's the best, absolutely," said Crash. They had spent the last
hour discussing WWF wrestlers. Jeff had learnt a few things that Crash had
let slip because of the few beers he'd had. Crash hated Steve Austin, who he
called "a self-centered piece of trash". Jeff rarely even saw Austin, since
he was such a big shot. He was supposedly at WWF New York tonight. The only
big name guys he really talked to were Undertaker, who was a locker room
leader, Triple H, for "personal" reasons and The Rock, who was a lot cooler
than his on-screen persona suggested. Jeff was attracted to Rocky, but he
seemed totally straight. Rock had one of the hottes bodies Jeff had ever
seen. Jeff blinked. "You OK, Jeff?" asked Crash, noticing Jeff deep in
thought. "Uh... oh yeah, I'm fine man," Jeff responded in his thick southern
accent. Jeff looked at his watch. 1:12pm. They had another show in NYC
tomorrow so there was no rush, but Jeff realized his wasn't getting laid
tonight. "Hey man, I think I'll head off. Gotta meet my bro' and Amy early
tomorrow morning," he said. "I'll walk back to the hotel with you,"
responded Crash, smiling.

They were nearing the hotel when some kind of commotion broke out down the
street. It looked like two guys were fighting. Jeff wasn't interested, but
Crash stopped and glanced over. Jeff sighed and looked around. He noticed
something half out of the back pocket of Crash's black pants. A key.
Probably his apartment key. Jeff felt his heart rush. He could... "No!" he
scolded himself quietly. But temptation got the better of him and he lightly
pulled it from Crash's back pocket and in a flash tossed it on to the grass
strip nearby. Crash turned, shaking his head, "Those guys are nuts!" and
they completed the trip to the hotel. They were on the same floor, about 12
doors apart. "Later man," said Crash as he approached his room. "Yeah,
later," responded Jeff and headed down the corridor. He deliberately fumbled
with his key, until he heard Crash yell, "Damn!". Jeff turned, "What's up
man?". Crash angrily exclaimed, "Lost my damn key. I'm gonna have to head
back...". Jeff put on his best thoughtful expression and said, "You can
crash on the spare bed in my room if you want man...?". The WWF had provided
everyone with queen sized bed's and smaller ones in the same room. Crash
nodded without hesitation ("Man, he has no interest," thought Jeff) and
thanked Jeff for the offer.

Jeff lay on his bed, watching the TV. He had put a tape of this Thursday's
Smackdown in, where he hadn't done much except help Matt beat Funaki with
Taka. Jeff thought Taka was cute, but he barely spoke a word of English so
it was hard to communicate with him. Crash and Molly vs. Rhyno and Christian
started, Crash groaning in dismay on his bed. "Rhyno's so careless, man. I'm
not gonna complain because they'll suspend me or something. They're such
assholes." Jeff looked over at Crash's arm, "He did that?". "Yeah," said
Crash, nodding. He stood and wandered over to Jeff, removing the bandage.
Bruising. Looked painful. Jeff gestured to his neck, "Got myself an injury
today too.". "Sorry," responded Crash. "It's a tough business man," said
Jeff, who had fucked himself up badly in the Tables-Ladders-Chairs match at
Wrestlemania on April 1st. "Mind if I have a look?" requested Crash. "Sure,
but I don't think you can see anything..." replied Jeff, bending his neck
enough to give Crash a look. Crash lightly brushed it with his fingers. Jeff
shivered and crushed himself inwardly. "What's up Jeff?" Crash inquired.
"Uh...n...nothing," Jeff stumbled. Crash carressed his neck and moved his
hand to Jeff's face, meeting his eyes. "I... uh...". Crash moved closer and
slipped his tongue into Jeff's mouth. He kissed Jeff slowly and deeply. Jeff
let Crash take charge, feeling as submissive as he did with Triple H.

Crash broke the kiss and noticed Jeff's look of shock. "Man, I'm sorry. I
thought...". "No, it's fine...I mean I liked it!" said Jeff, struggling to
get his words out. He calmed himself and said, "Man, I've dreamt of kissing
you for months...hell, years. I saw you on TV before you came to the WWF.
Let's...do you...I mean...". Crash put a finger on Jeff's lips and moved
down, kissing his neck. Jeff sighed heavily, a sigh of pleasure. Crash was
careful not to put too much pressure on the neck. Crash took his shirt off,
revealing a largely muscled, smooth tanned body. Jeff had wondered before if
he took steroids, but didn't care now. Jeff took his own clothes. Crash
kissed his way down Jeff's slightly hairy chest and found his right nipple.
He licked it and nibbled softly, exciting Jeff more than he had ever been
before. Crash was in love with Jeff's body, kissing his chest and nipples.
He paused to unbutton his pants and take them off. His legs were smoother
than Jeff had thought and tanned. Jeff watched him removed his boxer,
revealing a hard, uncut penis. Jeff's eyes wandered past it to the ass that
he had fanticized about so much. It was plump and round, so perfect. They
kissed again, Jeff locking his legs around Crash, wanting him to be as close
as possible. Crash licked his way down to Jeff's cock. He grabbed it and
pushed back the foreskin. Crash placed his wet lips around Jeff's glistening
penis and sucked. Jeff moaned, in nirvana. Crash knew what he was doing,
finding the sensative points. He rans his tongue around Jeff's glory hole,
licking the precum. Jeff just lay back, experiencing the pleasure Crash
provided.

Crash slid up and smiled as Jeff. Jeff's cheeks were a glowing red. It was a
hot night and he was sweating. He ran his hands down Crash's hard chest and
moved down to his cock. Jeff sucked it. He took pleasure in Crash's moans
and cries, more experienced than he in giving blowjobs. Jeff sucked Crash
dry of salty precum and moved to his ballsack, sucking and licking Crash's
testicles. He moved even further down to the miracle inch, humming into it.
Crash was sensitive here and moaned even louder. Crash's ass was in sight.
Jeff wanted it so much. Crash seemed to sense this and turned on to his
stomach. Jeff knew this moment might never come again, so ran his hands
along Crash's butt, taking it in. He kissed it gently, wanting to taste
Crash. Jeff slowly spread the butt cheeks, revealing a flawlessly smooth
butthole. Jeff thought his heart was going to explode because it was
pounding so hard and fast. Jeff moved down and began to lick the soft walls
of Crash's anus. He made sure every inch was lubed and pushed his tongue
slightly up the hole. When he was done, he slid back up to Crash and lay a
little beneath him, laying on his chest. "You like my ass, huh?" said Crash,
grinning. "You betcha. Why don't you sample mine?". Jeff had shaved his ass
smooth this morning. Crash obliged and gave Jeff a rimjob. He didn't seem as
eager as Jeff, but that might not have been possible.

When Crash was done, Jeff just sighed, "Fuck me." Crash positioned himself
on Jeff and slowly moved his cock between Jeff's lubed ass cheeks. He
pressed forward into the hole, Jeff clenching his teeth. Crash was careful,
but it still hurt like hell. Jeff didn't mind though, because the pleasure
was more intense than the pain. Crash got into a pattern of slowly moving in
and out, his cock slowly thrusting in and out of Jeff's asshole. Jeff knew
what Crash wanted and whispered, "Faster...harder...". Crash quickened the
pace, moving in and out of Jeff as fast as he could, both men screaming in
pleasure. Jeff moved up to meet Crash's thrusts, tightening his ass around
Crash's penis as it entered, a;lso thrusting three fingers into Crash's ass.
As Crash neared his climax, he pulled his cock from Jeff's ass and dropped
down on Jeff's chest, panting. Both men were lined with sweat. "You turn,"
panted Crash. Crash moved on to all fours and spread his legs as much as
possible. Jeff mounted him and slowly began his entry. Crash placed a hand
on Jeff's butt cheeks and just pushed him in. Jeff gasped, as did Crash.
"Fast as you can, man," said Crash, in an almost challenging tone. Jeff
fucked Crash deep and hard as fast he could. Their sweaty, glistening body's
were locked as they both cried in pain and pleasure, savoring this moment.

Jeff felt his cock expand and gasped to Crash, "Please...I gotta...". "Leave
your load in me Jeff..." said Crash, who jerked off as Jeff laid into his
sweaty and slippy asshole. Jeff could feel it. He wanted to hold off to
prolong the moment but couldn't. One deep thrust later and he burst a huge
load, deep into Crash's anus. Crash fired off his own big load a few seconds
later and they both collapsed to the bed, Jeff still inside Crash. Both men
gasped for breath, laying on the soaked bed sheets. Jeff pulled his penis
out and lay on Crash's chest, thoughtful. Crash brushed his fingers through
Jeff's hair and cheekily said, "Wait 'till you see my "cousin's" rod...you
won't know what hit you." Jeff kissed Crash deeply one more time, before
they both drifted off to sleep, in an embrace of love.