Date: Fri, 16 Sep 2011 01:51:06 -0500 From: Paul Tolbert <jatonblue@gmail.com> Subject: SEXY LITTLE THINGS 8 SEXY LITTLE THINGS Chapter 8: The Great White's Sun-Filled Adventure Pairing: Sheamus/Evan Bourne WWE Slash Fiction "Awwww. Doesn't this feeeeeel just great? I'm in total amazement how wonderful this feels. Paradise doesn't compare to this utter bliss." "I'm sure that's true babe." "WELL Stephen if you'd lose the 15 million layers of clothes you're wearing and put that e-tablet away, you could bask in this luxury like I'm doing. Just let loose and be free from those constricting garments. Walk around buck-ass naked in full glory with no shame. The beach is for having fun and experiencing the wonders of your surroundings, not reading some cheesy Celtic comic book. Put that electronic device away and sun bathe with me." "Thanks fella but I'll pass on that." "Ugh. C'moooonh! It's the end of Summer, we're lounging on a private beach in Greece, lots of warm rays from the glowing yellow ball up above, great wine and cheeses at our disposal, not to mention hot guys..." "You reckon I'm one of those `hot guys' you speak of?" "Doubt it." "Hmm." "I DON'T KNOW! Take off your protective armor and let me find out silly. Show me what a Celtic Warrior from the emerald isle looks like standing at what apparently is forbidden territory for the pale-skinned." "I can't get a tan Evan. You know I shouldn't even be out here with ya. My fare complexion is my schtick and the higher ups in the WWE would be pissed if I did, not like I could even if I tried. We talked about this earlier on the flight here remember?" "Who the fuck cares if you get 100 shades darker by being in the sun for 2 seconds? Just lather in some Miracle Whip before you go out in public tomorrow. You'll be fine. Besides, who the hell comes to the beach, a private beach at that, wearing dark blues, a sweater vest and a button shirt? I know the sun is your natural enemy but c'mon Stephen! I sooo wanna go skinny dipping with you. You are sweating profusely love. You need to wash off. How about a dip in the sea?" "I'm not taking my clothes off and I'm not going swimming in that filthy water Evan. Just let me read my comics in peace. You enjoy yourself. I'll watch ya from here alright fella? You know how much I love watching ya." "You mean you'll obsess and stalk me from the safety and comfort of the beach huh?" "Whore." "OMG no you didn't! Stephen! I'm sooo not a whore. Want me to rub my ass in your face?" "Maybe, but not now. My comics are--" "SNATCH!" "EVAN!!! Dammit give me my Kindle back!" "NOPE! If you want it `Great White' come and get it. You should be able to catch a whore like myself no problem." "OK OK! Evan please give it back. Your getting too close to the water! Get back here! I haven't backed up those comics to my laptop yet!" "SORRY STEPHEN! I-CAN'T-HEAR-YOU. YOUR TOO FAR AWAY!!!" "Dammit Evan I swear if you--" "Stephen. Come and get--oh shit..." "YOU LITTLE FUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "OMG STEPHEN IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!!! I DIDN'T MEAN TO DROP IT IN THE WATER. I--I lost my footing and...and--" "Great, just great! There goes my life. Washed out to sea. You know how much I loved my Kindle and everything on it. It was attached to my hip! My hip Evan!" "You're incredibly WHITE hip..." "THIS ISN'T FUNNY!" "Well...you should have just taken your clothes off..." "You want me to take my clothes off huh fella? That what you want you little slut? COME HERE!" "Whoa! What are you doing Stephen?!?" "The only person who's gonna get their attire removed is YOU!" "Omg no. Stop. STOP! Stay away from me Ronald McDonald wannabe!" "GET BACK HERE! Shit! Now I got sand in my shoes." "TAKE--THEM--OFF--FUCKER! HA! Come and get me now `Great White'. You scared to jump in the water after me? Afraid Jaws will nibble at your toes for jacking his nickname?" "I'll tell you what kind of chops are gonna be nibbling at your toes soon enough." "Ooooh! Sexy. Gotta grab me first. You, salt water and the sun aren't a winning combination so I doubt you'll be able to get it. Ah too bad." "Evan you don't know how bad you're gonna get it right now..." "What are you gonna do Steph? You gonna fuck me silly til my eyes roll in the back of my head? Teach me a fucking lesson that sluts like me only respond to?" "Yeah..." "Well I'm in the water where it's safe and you are on dry land. You can pace back and forth like a lion patiently awaiting for the right moment to pounce on his prey but I'm not getting out. You're coming in." "I can stay out here all day fella 'til ya decide to get out. No worries here. Starting to prune up yet Borne?" "Nope. My silky smooth and delicious skin is just perfect in salt water. Sure you can stand there all day watching me like an idiot til I decide to get out of the water, BUT what happens if I drift...out...to...to sea? These rip...currents are--OUCH! HELP! HELP!!!" "Evan stop playing around." "Stephen help me!!! Something's--caught on--my leg." Evan?!? EVAN! hold on!" "Step--" "Here I am. Come here. It's alright, I got ya fella. I got ya. Stop panicking I'm here, just hold on to me and breathe. There we go. You're safe now. You alright? Evan? EVAN!" "Steph...Stephen you...your in the water...with me...and...your clothes are all wet. Steph..." "Evan?" "Take your clothes off." "YOU LITTLE SLUT! You faked drowning didn't you?" "Maybe. Now were both wet, in this big ass body of water with the sun blazing down on us. I got a present for you. Here you go. A token of my appreciation for `saving' me." "Evan put your banana hammock back on. Someone might see you naked." "No way! I love skinny-dipping. Besides, no one is out here but us. Take your clothes off. Show me what a `Sperm Whale' looks like. I know you can satisfy my curiosity, if only you remove your clothes." "The idea is after a person has swallow so much salt water from `drowning' isn't to shove an astronomical 11 inch object down their throat until they've recovered, certainly one they had trouble swallowing in the past." "You bastard. Go ahead and wipe that smirk off your face. `Moby Dick' is not THAT big." "Evan, I know you just went through a traumatic experience and what not, but that's no reason to lie is it? They don't call me the Great White for nothing." "O.M.G your so funny. Ha. Ha. Ha. But seriously take your fucking clothes off!" "Alright! Might as well I guess. I'm drenched...There. Nothing left to complain about now right? I did what you asked." "Awesome. This feels nice doesn't it Steph?" "Sure. Why do I love you so much Borne?" "I don't know. You tell me." "Because I just do babe. I just do." "I love you too Stephen. Stephen?" "Yeh?" "This is the last time were going to the beach isn't it?" "Didn't realize you were a mind reader."