Date: Sat, 25 Feb 2006 10:08:36 +1000
From: Hayden Som <equinoxneo@hotmail.com>
Subject: Centre of March Chapter 9

This is a work of fiction.  The author retains all rights.  Reproductions 
are not allowed without the authors consent. 

There are no explicit sexual acts contained in this work, it is a story of
love and the strong bonds shared between two guys.

This is the first story I have submitted.  I would love to hear from you (I
have received a lot of emails so keep sending them, and if you haven't
already, I really want to know how I'm doing; I just love reading support
mail!) so email me on exuinoxneo@hotmail.com and be honest with what you
think (but not brutally!).  You can even email me if you have any questions
- which readers outside of Australia may wish to do as you may not
understand the meaning of some slang words.  Enjoy.


NINE

There was emptiness all around me.  Darkness.  I was floating through 
nothing.  My thoughts were lucid, I was aware of myself and so much more.  
Somehow this place felt familiar, like a place I've been to before but was 
only recognisable upon seeing again.  In fact, I remember being here on 
countless occasions.  Time and space did not exist here, not in the same 
sense it did on the earthly plane.  This was a place of transition, a place 
where choices can lead to infinite possibilities, where souls gather to 
remember the world vision and where answers may be found to questions never 
asked.  This was a realm where thoughts and desires manifested.  But not all 
desires lead to paradise.  The souls of those who never awakened on the 
earthly plane would only manifest their own private hell.  It was the only 
hell that existed.

Life, flourish.  Before me a field of colours sprang from the darkness, 
grandiose trees and picturesque blooms sprouted from an expanding grassland 
that continued to grow into the horizon.  Light shone from everywhere 
without any specific source, touching everything with a heavenly glow.

Body, corporeal.  Sensation flowed as I was grounded, my body materialised 
in clothes of pure white.  I could feel blades of grass between my toes and 
felt the gentle wind blowing through my hair.  I did not need a vessel to 
traverse these realms, but experience was a privilege and should not be 
taken for granted.

I walked through the fields without fear.  There were other souls here, 
some that overlapped into my realm, and I could see them struggling with 
their transitions into a higher existence as they continued to replay that 
which they held on to dearly.  Here a person ran in circles chasing a trail 
of money, there another sat at a computer furiously typing.  They would 
continue their dramas until they could learn to let go.  I could not help 
them, it would be futile, so I closed my eyes and when I opened them the 
other souls had disappeared.

I continued to walk, each step the same as the one before.  The environment 
did not change, but I knew that I would eventually reach a destination.  I 
did not know where I was going, only that I had faith in my search.

In the distance something was altered, when I reached it I found myself 
standing on the shores of an expansive ocean.  A shining sphere of light 
hovered a few metres away from where I stood.  Then it transformed into a 
person, flickering from one bodily image to another.  Once a female, then a 
male, an old man, an old woman, and hundreds of variations in between.  
Finally it settled into a male body garbed in similar white clothes as 
myself.

- It has been a while old friend.

"Indeed it has," I said.  The words were not spoken, rather, it was 
understood.

He turned.  I knew him.  I have always known him.

- We meet again.

"As we always do."

- We have lived before.

"And shall live again."

Eternal love emanated from this being, the same love that I myself felt for 
them.  It was a love as old and natural as creation.

- We have shared many lives and will share many more.

"It is the path we have chosen."

- Yes, we have been fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, friends, enemies 
and lovers.  But always reborn to cross paths.

"And we are at another crossroad now."

- It is a test of our strength and conviction.

"I do not know if I can make it through this time."

- That is part of the experience.

"You always were the optimistic one, and always there for me when I needed 
you."

- The time has come for our roles to be reversed.  I need you now, more 
than ever.

"It was never this hard."

- It has never been easy either.

I stood for a moment feeling the wind lightly blowing against my face and 
the tiny grains of sand shifting beneath my feet.  I blinked and when my 
eyes reopened I stood directly in front of this familiar soul.  His eyes 
were a vibrant light green colour and his face was smooth, glowing with 
radiance.  His hair was dark, almost black.  A neatly trimmed goatee 
encircled his mouth.

"What will become of us this time?" I asked.

- You know that will depend on our choices.  Our paths are always changing, 
nothing is certain.  The only thing that is certain is the infinite future.

"I have not always made the best choices."

- I believe that you have.  You have always come through.

"My next choice may bear a heavy burden if I do not choose wisely, I am not 
sure if I am ready."

- You will do as you must.

"I can only hope."

- It is time.

"Time to return."

He transformed back into a sphere of light drifting in the air for a while 
before soaring into the distance and disappearing beyond the horizon.

My surroundings began to fade, the darkness was returning.  It wasn't long 
before everything melted into nothingness.  Then sounds began to filter 
through.  Two distinct voices were speaking, arguing with each other.  I 
opened my eyes and the glaring brightness of artificial lighting blinded me 
for a moment.  I was sitting on a hard plastic seat with my head resting on 
a pillow.  I couldn't understand where I was or how I happened to be here.  
When I saw Aunt Jen and Julie I realised I was in the emergency waiting room 
of the hospital.  Memory returned to me along with the painful emotions.  I 
was sure I was somewhere else just a moment before, but the harder I tried 
to remember, the further out of reach it became until no traces of the 
experience remained, like a dream that was forgotten moments after 
awakening.

Aunt Jen was pacing back and forth looking distressed.  She said to Julie, 
"Honey, I swear, I can't see his aura, things like this don't happen."

"He's just sleeping Aunt Jen," Julie said, "You're getting worried over 
nothing."

"Maybe I'm not explaining it right," Aunt Jen said in frustration, "Aura's 
don't disappear unless the person is dead or . . . no, it can't be."

They hadn't noticed I was awake.  I said, "Are you both talking about me 
again?"

Aunt Jen and Julie turned to look at me at the same time.  Aunt Jen 
squinted at me, sighed and smiled with relief.

"March, thank God, I can see your aura again," She said.

"That's because he's awake now," Julie commented.

"How long have I been asleep?" I asked, "And how did I end up here?  I 
thought I was on the floor before."

Julie raised her eyebrow, she said, "Almost an hour."

"Don't you remember that I helped you up to the seat?" Aunt Jen said 
intrigued, "You were so tired you could barely walk, let alone speak."

"Last thing I remember was falling asleep on the floor next to you Aunt 
Jen," I said.  Then worriedly, "Any word about Edric?"

Aunt Jen looked grim.  She shook her head, sat down next to me and placed a 
hand on my arm reassuringly.

I took a deep sigh and stared at the floor.  I wasn't completely sure why, 
but I wasn't feeling as upset as before.  I felt calmer, though still 
distraught, which was evident from the incessant gnawing sensation I felt in 
my stomach.

"Oh, by the way," Julie said, "I drove home while you were asleep and got 
you some fresh clothes."

"Thanks," I said taking the bag of clothes she was holding out, "Red is 
just not me anyway."

Aunt Jen raised her eyebrows and Julie looked horrified.

"Sorry guys," I said, "Just trying to lighten the mood."

I headed for the men's toilets to change into the fresh clothes.  I threw 
the blood stained ones in the bin on the way out.  When I returned to the 
emergency waiting room, the doctor was speaking to Aunt Jen.  He turned when 
he saw her look at me.

"March?" He asked.

"Yeah," I answered tentatively, my heart started to beat faster.

"I have some good news for you," the doctor said, "Edric has awakened from 
his unconscious state."

A sense of release from the stressful events overcame me, and I felt a 
heavy weight lifted from my shoulders. I said, "Thank God."

"We've moved him to intensive care and he's asked to see you," the doctor 
said, "But he's very weak and still in a precarious condition, so please 
make it short.  I'll show you the way there."

I was walking on air, gliding, as I followed the doctor with Aunt Jen and 
Julie trailing behind.  It wasn't far and when the doctor left us by the 
door I was too afraid to walk through it.

I steeled myself, schooled my thoughts and opened the door.  He was lying 
in a hospital bed, slanted to prop him up.  He had thick layers of bandage 
wrapped around his forehead.  All manner of hospital machinery surrounded 
him and attached themselves to him by wires and tubes.  The sight tore at my 
heart, but I kept my face free from the distress I was feeling.  He looked 
at me and smiled faintly.  I smiled back.  Even with half his face swollen, 
it was enough to light up the room.

"How are you holding up there buddy?" I asked him.

Edric swallowed, failed at his first attempt to speak, and then said, "I 
didn't think you would be here."

"Hey," I said soothingly, I grabbed his hand in both of mine and squeezed 
it gently, "I'm not going anywhere."

"I'm glad you're here," he said in a voice still weak, he noticed Aunt Jen 
and Julie behind me and said, "All of you."

"We're thankful that you're okay dear," Aunt Jen told him.

"You gave me a real scare," I said, "I don't want you to do that to me 
again."

Edric grinned, he said, "I hope I live long enough not to."

"Don't say that," I said, "Of course you will."

"Hmm," he looked at me and I suddenly realised we shared something not many 
people ever do, he said, "You look like shit."

I laughed softly, I said, "Well you don't look too bad yourself.  Besides, 
you're the source of inspiration for my current appearance."

"I'm so sorry that I put you through all this," Edric said sadly, "I didn't 
mean to cause you any grief."

"What's life without a bit of drama, hey?" I joked.

Edric's face went grim and he looked away for a moment when he looked back 
he said, "I stood up for you, to my brother, I told him what I do with my 
life isn't his concern."

"You don't have to explain," I said, noticing the stress of talking about 
it was causing him pain.

"He was angry, we'd already lost our mother and pretty much our father and 
I was the only family he had left," Edric said, his face contorted in pain 
and the cardiac monitor began to beep faster.

"You don't have to tell me," I said trying to stop him from over exerting 
himself.

"We got into an argument and he said he was disappointed with me," Edric 
was breathing faster, the beeping from the damn machines was steadily 
increasing, still he continued, "He hit me from behind, and I fell, but he 
kept hitting me."

A doctor rushed in followed by several nurses.

"You have to make it through this," I said feeling my time with him grow 
short, "Don't you leave me here alone."

Edric's eyes were drooping, his breath was now coming to him in shorter 
gasps.  He said in a bare whisper, "I don't regret anything."

A female nurse pulled me away, she said, "It's best you left the room for 
now."

Red graphics flashed across the screens of the hospital equipment as they 
beeped faster.  The nurse didn't push me out of the room so I stayed a few 
metres by the door where Julie propped it open for Aunt Jen, they were just 
as hesitant to leave.

My head was spinning and a tightness in my chest was threatening to 
suffocate me.   A nurse was preparing the defibrillators.

The doctor noticed me standing there and said to the female nurse, "Get 
them out of here, now."

She gently grabbed my arm and prepared to lead me out but I wasn't going to 
move.  Edric was looking at me, his eyes conveyed a deep regret and I 
watched as the light in them slowly disappeared.  Then the cardiac monitor 
flat-lined.

"No!" I screamed, I wanted to rush to his side but the nurse was 
restraining me with surprising strength, I extended my arms out instead 
trying to reach for him and grabbing nothing but air.  Time slowed down to 
an agonising crawl as I watched the doctor rip open Edric's hospital robe 
and apply the defibrillator paddle again and again until at last he finally 
gave up.  Edric was dead.