Date: Tue, 10 Sep 2002 11:02:26 -0700
From: Steve Thomas <s4d@hotmail.com>
Subject: Chris-Crossed 18

I have been informed that it would be a good idea to state a few warning
comments.  There may be graphic sexual scenes between men in this story, so
please, if this offends you, or it is illegal or you are underaged to read
such, stop here and hit your "back" button.  If it is okay with you, read on
and enjoy.

Chapter 17 left us with the following:
"Don't go!" Rob said.  "Please stay with me tonight!"  I tugged on Craig's
neck and he understood.  He climbed and positioned himself on top, astride
of both of us, and we commenced a 3-way hug goodnight, Craig's face between
Rob's and mine.  Then he climbed over the other side of Rob, retrieved the
blanket and sheet which we had thrown to the floor, and then climbed in on
the other side of Rob, and we all three spooned, with Rob in the middle.

We fell asleep like that, with Rob's lips caressing my neck, his hand on my
chest.  I thought to myself, "That won't be the last time this happens!"

The next morning before we said our good byes, Jake and Colin got a moment
alone with Craig and me.  "What in the world were you guys doing last night?
  It sounded so hot!  It was hard to determine, but I thought I counted
three of you screaming!"

"Oh, Jakey!  I said! "I didn't want to bother you guys!"

"NO!"  Colin protested.  "It's alright.  We were just about asleep when we
heard your - your `noises'.  It started us going on our 'seconds'!  And the
second time was the best we ever did!"

I replied, "Happy Honeymoon!"

Chapter 18

We left Sunday morning so we could get back home and at least do some
homework.  Halloween was coming up, and Craig and I talked about going to an
open party at a park.  It was a gay area referred to as, "The Rainbow Club."
   It was not a club at all, but rather a place where gays meet in the park.
We heard about it from a guy at school, who was in one of Craig's classes.
I mentioned it to Carrie.

"No WAY!"  she said, with so much urgency, I wondered why. "That's where
Jakey caught his HIV. Stay away from that place!"

"Wo!"  I said, "How -"  at the sight of her face, I said, "Never mind."

"You can go with me and Rob to the School costume affair.  It's -"

"What!?"  You are going with Rob?"  I asked.  "How did you get him to ask
you?"

"I didn't!  I asked him."  She smiled sweetly.  "I hope he doesn't think I'm
to pushy."

"No, you don't!"  I retorted.  "And yes, he does!"

"Too bad!"  she said.  "If he wants to be with me, he'll just have to get
used to it.  I can't change for him or anyone else."

"You could try."

"Yeah, and I might do it for awhile.  Actually I have.  But later on when we
got closer, I went back to my more natural ways, and he hated it!  But this
was a guy who was very domineering.  Rob is - so naturally sweet and not
domineering.  If he can take my guff, then maybe we can work something out."

"Maybe."  I said.

"Tell me, cuz!"  she said.  "You know Rob probably better than anyone else.
Do you think he's bi - or even gay?"

"I'm pretty sure he likes girls.  As to if he's bi, I can't say.  I - I
can't tell you why, but - but I have reason to wonder."

"Why, Mr. sexy?"  she said.  "Did you already seduce him?"

"Not exactly."

"What?  Was it his idea?"

"Look, Carrie, I told you I can't tell you.  Just be satisfied that I have
no knowledge of his ever touching another guy!  Okay?"

Well, so I stretched the truth just a little!  Rob didn't actually do
anything sexual WITH us!

"So is it a date then?" she said.

"Huh?"

"A little focus here!  Do you and Craig wanna go to the costume party with
us?"

"Let me talk to Craig."  I said.  "I want to go, so - probably!"

**********************************************************************

"Carrie REALLY wants us to go, so Rob will feel more comfortable."  I said
to Craig.

"Well, I'm just not too sure that I am ready for this."

"Hey!  I know what you are saying!  I am not even sure I am ready to make
our thing public."

"It's more than making it public, Dude.  It's - well I guess that's exactly
what it is!  It's telling the whole world, `HEY!  I'm GAY!'  I'm just not
too sure that -"

"We can go stag!  Everyone knows you and Rob and I are room mates.  And
besides, no one who will be there, cares!  They wouldn't -"

"I don't want to take that chance - I just don't."

"Craig, I want to tell you, I don't think I will ever be one to shout to the
world what my sexual preference is.  It's none of their business.  But it
will get very old, keeping it a secret.  There were a few who knew about me
in Berkeley, and -"


"Berkeley is not Santa Barbara!  And you are not me!  We have discussed this
before and you agreed that we would gravitate to the safe side.  Whoever is
not ready - has veto power."  Craig was adamant.  "That would be me.  I love
you, but -"

"Listen to you!  What kind of love says, `I love you *but*'?  Craig, I love
you.  Period!  I am so in love with you!  And I am so proud of you!  You are
everything anyone would want in a friend - and a sweetheart."  I said.
Craig looked helpless.  I continued, "Look, do you think you can keep your
hands off me for the entire evening?  I think I could do that.  We would be
doing it for Rob and for my cousin."

"You think you could?  I can't imagine that would be very much fun!  But for
Rob, - I guess I would do almost anything."

"Sure you can - WE can!"  I encouraged.  "And we can make an early evening
of it, if we want.  I think once Rob gets into the swing of what's going on,
he won't even notice if we leave."

"Well, Okay then."

"Well, don't sound so damned enthusiastic about it!"

***********************************************************

"But how come," Rob said, "you can't ride with me?"

"In the first place, we want to go separately.  Besides that - DUDE!  This
is a date - for you!  She didn't ask you because she just can't get another
date!  She is a senior and she is very - hot!  And by the way - so are YOU!"

"GOD! Is he ever!" Craig added.  Rob blushed.  "Will you ever get over
that?"

"What?"  Rob said.

"Blushing so easily!"

"I hope not!"  I said.  "He is one of the cutest guys I've ever seen with
his red face - even under all that green makeup!  Oh put your lower lip back
in, Mr. Studly!"  I said to Craig.  "You will always be the cutest over all
- to me.  Except, maybe  when Rob blushes!"  And I kissed Rob on the cheek.
Craig stuck his tongue out at me.

"Heh!" Rob said, "now your lips are all green!"

There was a great costume shop not too far away from us.  Rob was going as
the Incredible Hulk.  Hee hee! Try as he might, he could not get himself
ugly enough!  I went as "Rambo" and Craig was dressed as the most delicious
sailor I ever saw!  "Why did you have to look so good?!"  I asked him.  And
I have to keep my hands OFF you?"

"Touch me, Matie, and I'll shiver your timber!"  Craig said.

"OOO!  That could be a good thing!" I answered.

Rob said, "I think I'm gonna puke!"

"Yeah," Craig said, "You just hold that thought until tonight as you try to
synchronize your wank to our rhythm!  Must be tough being such a horny
virgin!"  Rob didn't even blush!

We headed out to the cars.  "Hey!"  Rob siad.  "You guys are driving
separately - even from each other?"

"We may be the only stags there.  We don't want to arrive together."

"Oh."

**********************************************************

As it turned out we were two among MANY stags there, mostly girls!  There
was one cute girl, Abby,  that would not leave Craig alone.  The girls kept
tapping other girls on the shoulder, to break into his dance.  She kept
returning.  I was actually feeling a little jealous!  There's something
about a man in uniform - especially a sailor - ESPECIALLY Craig!  We had
plenty to drink.  After awhile the other girls gave up and Abby was way too
drunk, rubbing herself all over Craig.  He still liked girls.  I knew that.
But he was miserable!

I took pity on him and tapped his shoulder, to relieve him. I guess she
didn't like Rambo.  She walked away, leaving Craig and I on the dance floor
together!  Craig grabbed me and started to dance with me.  I protested.  He
put his hand on my butt and pulled me in closer.  The others were howling!
I whispered, "Hey!  You're kind of overdoing it!  Don't you think they may
wonder?"

Problem was , in my own alcohol-liberated state, I only thought I was
whispering.  Two people close by said, almost in unison, "Wonder - about
what?"

Craig looked at me like he was a caged animal! He pushed me away with enough
force to knock me down. "Get away from me, FAG!"  he yelled, so everyone
within two blocks cold hear it.  I was not quick enough to make it into a
joke, as I may have if I was sober.  I later rehearsed it over and over in
my head - what I COULD have done. I just sat there, stunned.  Craig returned
to his newfound friend - Abby.  They left together a few minutes later.  I
was at a loss.  I looked at Carrie and Rob, and they looked as bewildered as
I felt.  When the party was winding down, Rob asked me to Denny's with
Carrie and him.  I was numb.  I just went with them.  I had to come back
later to pick up my car.

Denny's was the only all night diner nearby, so we often found ourselves
there.  We went in and it was full of collegiates, winding down.  I
immediately saw Craig and Abby sitting amongst a few others - friends of
hers, I assumed.  Rob and Carrie and I just had a soft drink and headed
home.  Rob escorted Carrie to the big house, while I headed for our place.
I unlocked the door.  The light was on.  I was sure I had turned it off
before we left.  I walked into our bedroom.  I stopped cold when I saw it!
They hadn't even taken the time or care to remake the bed!

I turned off the lights and went and lay on the couch.  Rob came in.  Seeing
me on the couch, "What's up, Chris?"

"I wish I knew."  I really felt numb.  I didn't know how I should feel.
Numb.  "I really wish I knew!"

Rob didn't know what to say to me.  He felt as helpless as I.  "You going
to, be alright, Dude?" he asked.

"I don't even know what that means."  I replied.

Rob sat on the floor and cradled my torso gently.  "I'm so sorry Dude.  Do
you want to come in with me tonight?"

"Naw.  Thanks!  I'm going to wait for him here."

"Okay.  Hey!  He was drunk.  We all were.  It'll be okay in the morning."

"Yeah - I hope so."

He was about to close his door. "You sure you don't want to - come sleep
with me tonight."

"Rob, you know I do!  But I want to be here when he comes home.  I don't
want him to find me in your bed."

"Yeah, I guess.  Maybe I should stay with you, here."

"Just go to bed.  I'll be alright."

"G'night."  He said as he disappeared into his room.  "I love you."  He
didn't close the door.

**********************************************

I couldn't sleep.  I didn't want to sleep.  It wasn't really very long
before I heard the key in the door.  He needn't have bothered.  It wasn't
locked.  He very quietly opened the door.  He didn't see me on the couch
until he flipped the light on.

"OH!  You're awake."

"Yeah."

He headed into our room and flipped that light on.  He stopped.  I think he
then remembered he forgot to make the bed. He turned and looked at me.  He
knew I knew.  And he knew I knew he knew I knew!  His eyes filled with
tears.  "What?"  I said.

"I don't know."

"You don't know."

"No."

"What don't you know!"

"Chris, I am so confused!  But -"

"But?"

"I am still pretty fucked up.  Can we put off this discussion until
tomorrow?"

"Yeah."

I could hear he was getting undressed, and I could hear when he got into
bed.  Then I could hear as he got back up again.  He padded out and sat down
in front of me.  "Please come to bed - please?"  I got up, and he went in
and held open the sheet for me.  I climbed in.  He followed and spooned me.
I felt cold.  Then I heard motion in the other room.  Then Rob came in, and
climbed in behind Craig.  He put his giant arm around both of us.  As if to
try to hold us together.

Chapter notes: This was a total surprise and shock to me!  When I write, I
AM Chris.  I adore Rob.  And I LOVE Craig!  I want to tell you that I know
where this is going - but I don't!  It is like a living, breathing thing,
almost apart from me.  Life is not a big party, all smiles and laughs.  So
neither is my story.  If you have comments, complain or exult, but don't
bother to try to affect the outcome.  Please mention "Chris" in the subject
box, and send it to s4d@hotmail.com.