Date: Mon, 30 Dec 2002 12:53:59 -0800
From: Steve Thomas <s4d@hotmail.com>
Subject: Chris-Crossed-Seth-24

I have been informed that it would be a good idea to state a few warning
comments.  There may be graphic sexual scenes between men in this story, so
please, if this offends you, or it is illegal or you are underaged to read
such, stop here and hit your "back" button.  If it is okay with you, read on
and enjoy.
I also want to thank Nifty for the opportunity to post my stories here.  I
have met some very nice people and been afforded an opportunity to express
myself as never before.  The feedback I have received here has encouraged me
on to write more.  Thanks to you all.

>From Chapter 23:
"Yeah, but - "
But?" I said.
"I was curious.  Now I'm not.  I want only you -- if you will still want me
after tonight!"
"I was trying to form in my mind how to tell you -- well -- the same thing.
Want you?  WANT YOU??"  I said.  "I want you, Brian, more than anything else
in the world!  I want you and -- only you!"
"Good, because loving you like I do now, anything less would have broken my
heart!  I love you, Sweet Seth!"
"I love YOU, Bri -- more than I realized was possible!"  We walked back into
the bedroom and climbed into bed together, and sweetly kissed goodnight,
after which I turned my backside into his front and we spooned all night.

Chapter 24

Saturday mornings are my favorite.  Especially now that Brian and I are
together.  He seldom works on weekends, unless they get desperate in the
E.R.  Sunday mornings, I'm already dreading going back to Cerritos, back to
school, back to work.  And the boys are beginning to bug me.  I used to be
so close to Eddie and even Mel, but now, they seem so -- juvenile!  Dad said
that I matured a lot because of my experiences in Vermont, and I guess he's
right.  I am grateful to my parents for allowing me to stay with them, but
my life starts on Friday afternoons.  I jump into my `Stang, and if it's not
raining, I almost always put the top down.  If I have to wear a thick coat
to keep warm, I still love it.  Well, to be honest, it never really gets
cold in Southern California.  But even 50 degrees can feel cold at 80 miles
per hour.
But Saturday mornings ... they're the best!  After last night -- CRAZY last
night -- with the bathroom shades pulled, the light did not wake me, so I
slept longer than usual.  I love waking up and seeing my sweet Brian's face,
usually still asleep, often with a smile dancing on his delicious lips.  I
will lay there for sometimes 45 minutes to an hour, straining to hold in my
pee -- just to watch him sleep.  I wonder as I lay there why I am so lucky.
Is this the universe making up to me for a sucky youth?
And then as soon as I move to get up, he usually wakes.  And then it's nice
too, of course.  He will say, in a very high and quiet voice, "Hi, Baby."
His voice is normally a rich baritone, but in the mornings, it is sweet,
soft and high.
This morning was different.  It was still dark in the bedroom because the
shade was still drawn.  I woke up and took a few moments to realize where I
was.  I was facing the middle of the bed.  No Brian.  I sniffed the air,
thinking, hoping there was a good smell coming from the kitchen, but no
smell, and no soft noises of him moving around, cooking or reading the
paper.
A note on his pillow.  I opened it.
"Dear, Sweet Boy,
First of all, I want to tell you how much I love you.  But ... of course I
can't!  It's hard enough to show you.  Last night was incredible.  YOU were
incredible!  I am sorry that I introduced another player to the mix, but --
well, you rolled with the punches.  I don't think I could ask for anyone
more perfect for me!  I need a younger man -- a kid, really, because I don't
think that I will ever grow up.  And I hope you never do, either -- at least
in the ways that make one old.
My beeper went off very early.  I kissed you goodbye, but I don't expect you
remembered it.  You were really sawing logs!  I hated leaving you, Seth.  If
you love me as I do you -- and by the way I catch you looking at me, I think
you must -- then I know how disappointed you are to find me gone.  I may be
back before you get a chance to read this -- I hope so.  They only need my
help to get through a rough spot.
I love you, Sweet Seth,
Brian"
<{R~I~N~G!!!}>
"Hello?"
"Hi Sweetheart!  Did I wake you?"
"Naw, I had to get up to answer the phone anyway."
"I'm sorry!  I thought as it was after ten - "
"Just kidding!  I just read your note.  I loved it -- and you!"
"There, you see how hard it is to express love in a letter -- or even over
the phone?  In one sentence you said you loved the letter and me -- making it
sound equal!"
"I didn't mean  -"
"I know you didn't.  Anyway, I am off, and I thought today would be a
perfect day to sail out to San Miguel."
"Don't tell me you have a sailboat too!"
"No, but Morty does, and he invited me to use it today.  He says hi and says
any time he'd do that again!  I had to disappoint him - and he was - but he
said he and Jack didn't sleep much last night!"
"Young love!"  I said, sarcastically.
"Yes, Dear," Brian dripped, "We are so very mature, aren't we?"
"Well," I said, "we are comfortable enough to be able to sleep!"
"See what you can find in the fridge to make sandwiches and I will be home
in a few.  Love you!"
"Love you too!"
I immediately went to the fridge and got out some lunch meats, lettuce,
butter and mayo, and threw together some sandwiches.  I put them and some
fruits and veggies, along with some soft drinks in a cooler and an ice pack.
  I stepped into the shower and was in my own thoughts, standing under the
water with my eyes closed when I felt something graze my neck, and a
whispered voice said, "Hey little boy, wanna play with me?"
I screamed, and slipped and almost fell.  Brian caught me. "Oh, Seth!  Seth!
I'm sorry!  I didn't mean to scare you!  God, I'm so sorry!  Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I g-g-- -" I felt a tight constriction of my chest, and let out a
huge gasping, shuddering sigh.  Then tears sprang to my eyes.
"Baby, What's wrong?"
"I -- it's just that -- I -- I've had some -- pretty -- BAD things -- happen.  I
g-g-guess I'm n-n-not quite over th- them." Another big sigh.
"Oh my sweet boy, I am so sorry!"
"It's not your fault, Bri.  But now that you know- you will be more -- more -
"
"Careful!  I'll definitely be more careful!"
I hugged him and after taking a long breath, and blowing it out, I said, "I
got a lunch together.  Bit isn't it awfully cold for sailing?"
"We can dress warm.  It is a perfect day for it: Clear with a strong
westerly wind."
"Westerly?  Won't it be hard coming back?"
"Westerly means it is coming from the west.  We do all the work getting out
there, and then we can coast coming home."
"Ah!"  I said.  "Brian, I know NOTHING about sailing, you know!  What
happens if we run into trouble?"
He stepped over to the window and pulled the shade back open.  "Look." He
said.  Already there were several sails in sight. "It's still early.  I am
an expert sailor, but if anything happened, help will be within hollering
distance.  Are you -- do you have a -- a -- fear -- of the water?"
"Actually I am an excellent swimmer.  But I was pushed overboard about a
year ago from a ferry crossing a very icy Lake Champlain.  My brother saved
me."
"My god!  Someone pushed you?  Is there anything else I should know about
you?"
"There is a lot you don't know.  I don't like to think about it, so I don't
talk about it.  But I will.  But for now, lets get hopping so we will be out
there with the other boats."  I knew I was being paranoid, but with my
history, how else could I be?
Brian hugged me even closer and reached for the soap.  He soaped me all
down, and scrubbed my back with a brush.  I returned the favor and we dried
off and got our clothes on.  We stopped at McD's for a "Quick `n Greasy" for
breakfast, then came back to the marina that was attached to the Condo
complex.
Morty's boat was an 18' Hobie-Cat.  We stowed the grub and when I stepped
onto the boat, I nearly went into the marina first thing!  I was sure it was
going to capsize, but it didn't, and Brian told me that the way Hobie-Cats
are made, it was nearly impossible to tip them all the way over.
We left the Marina and then he pointed to the northern most Island and
hollered (with the wind, it was necessary) "That's San Miguel!  With the
wind as it is, we will tack almost to Santa Rosa Island before cutting
between them and sailing round the outer shore of San Miguel.  We can stop
there and eat lunch."  After we eat, we can pretty much relax all the way
back."
"Whatever you say!" I hollered back.
Brian did most of the work.  Tacking into the wind took a lot of work, but
it was obvious he was telling the truth when he said he was an expert.  I
was fascinated by the whole process, but what I enjoyed the most was just
watching him work.  He was so graceful in his movements!  And he looked like
he was in heaven.  Once in awhile he would look at me and I could see pure
love in his eyes -- for me and for what he was doing.
We stopped on the seaward side of San Miguel to eat.  There was no beach, so
we just ate on the canvas platform between the hulls of the boat.  The sun
was high and was sparkling off the choppy water.  It was beautiful and quite
mesmerizing.  I was just about to fall asleep when Brian said, "We should be
getting back, Sweetie.  The wind is picking up a little, and I don't want it
to get ahead of us."
We stowed our trash and our cooler and pushed off, tacking out away from the
island.  Then he swung us around and pointed us toward home.  "See the brown
and green buildings above the rocks?" he said.
"Yes.  Is that yours?"
"The one with the steepest cliffs is ours, and mine is the last on the left.
  See the big window on the far left?"
"That's your shower?"
"Yup!  And with a good pair of binoculars we can easily be seen!  Well, not
during the day, because of the reflection, but at night . . ."
"But at night there aren't that many boats out here."
"No, but you know we always see a few!"
"I've been watching you closely, especially on the way out here.  I can't
figure out why you don't have a boat.  You seem to be very good at it and
obviously you love it."
"You have to pick and choose, Sweetie.  I wanted the Ferrari more.  Don't
worry, a boat was close behind."
"Certainly you could have afforded a boat!  With all you spent on those
cars!"
"You're right! And a boat was going to be next.  But then - "
"NO!  Don't EVEN tell me you postponed your boat to buy those cars!  That's
fucked!"
"Seth, do you have any idea how important you are to me?  First of all, if
the Ferrari is important, you are so much more so!  And - "
"And you had to buy the other cars to justify buying mine!"
"I know -- maybe it was foolish -- but it was my decision to make, wasn't it?
Please don't bug me about it!  I bought the car -- well really, the cars --
BECAUSE I love you -- not to get YOU to love ME!"
"I know that, but -- I could never - "
"Just stop, Seth!  You HAVE!  I LOVE the pendant, and it cost you the same
in your time and mine cost me!  No more of this talk now!  This was supposed
to be fun!"
"Sorry!  I AM enjoying it!.  You'll have to teach me how to sail.  You make
it look so easy!"
"This part IS easy!  You wanna take the tiller for awhile?  It's kinda fun!"
"I -- I -- don't know - ?"
"C'mon!  It's easy!"
"Okay!"  I said with a very wide grin!  We were about halfway back.  I was
sitting near the mast.  I stood up to change places.
"Don't stand up!"  He hollered, but it was too late!  The boat tipped and I
fell into the water.  It wasn't as cold as Champlain was, but I was still
pretty shocked!  I stopped cold in the water, and the boat kept slicing
through the water.  He wasn't so far away that I couldn't see the concern in
his eyes.  Moving as quickly as he could, he turned around and tacked back
to me.  He reached over to grab me as he came along side and with both our
weight, the boat tipped severely.
The boom came around and hit him on the head, and the next moment he was
beside me in the water, out cold!  I grabbed him by the collar of his jacket
and tried to hold on to the boat as best I could!  Just then I heard someone
holler, "Let go, We will grab you!"  I did as I was told, much calmer than I
expected I could be.  I handed him to them to drag up first.  The whole
drama probably didn't take more than 2 minutes, but it seemed like about an
hour!
Without anyone at the tiller, Morty's boat just tacked over and took the
wind on the side, dead in the water.  Their boat, like ours was built for
two, so it lumbered in the water with four, but he was able to get it along
side our boat. "Do you think you can climb over to your boat?"
"I -- I -- g-g-guess!"
"Can you handle the tiller?"
"No!  I've never done it!"
"Honey, you better go with him!" he said to his companion.  I checked Brian.
  He was breathing okay, but still not conscious.
"Do you have anything to keep him warm?"  I said.
"Oh!  Yeah!"  He replied.  He covered Brian up with a blanket. "Do you have
anything over there?"
"Yeah."
"Where are you from?"
"Cerritos."
"Cerritos!??" He looked incredulous.  "No! Do you know where you sailed
from?" I pointed to the condos.  "Ah!  The Cliffs!  Great!  So are we!
What's your name?"
"I'm Seth Gary."  I said.  Seeing the blank stare, I said, "OH!  I don't
live there! That's Brian Michaels!"
"You mean DOCTOR Michaels?!"  He exclaimed!  "I didn't recognize him with
his eyes closed and all wet!  We live right around the corner!  Okay,
carefully climb over onto your boat, and my wife will follow.  "I'm Sandy
Wentworth and this is my wife, Delores -- Del!"
Del expertly guided us to the marina, followed by Sandy and Brian.  Brian
wasn't yet conscious.  Del said, "Which slip is his -- I didn't even know he
had a boat."
"He doesn't.  This belongs to Morty -- uh - "
"Steinman?  I know where his is!"  She put the boat neatly into its slip,
followed by Sandy into the very next slip. "I should have recognized Morty's
Hobie!"
"Seth, We'll take Brian immediately to the E.R.  If you want, you can go
change clothes and come as soon as you can." Sandy said.  "Do you have a
change of clothes at Brian's?"
"Yeah!  I won't be far behind."  I ran all the way to the house, and when I
got in there, I started noticing how very cold I was!  I started a hot bath
to warm up in and as the tub was filling, I caller the E.R. to alert them
Brian was on the way in.  I stepped into the bath.  It didn't take long to
warm me up.  I got out and dried off.
"Hello!  This is Seth Gary.  Has Brian Michaels been brought in yet?"
"Yes.  This is Seth?  Dr. Steinman wants to talk to you."
"Seth?  This is Morty.  What happened."
"You want the short story?"
"How did Brian get knocked out?"

"He got hit pretty hard with the boom."
"Did he take in any water?"
"I don't think so -- at least not much.  I was right there, and was able to
keep his head above water until Wentworths came along."
"Okay.  Was he able to say anything to you at all, after the knock to the
head?"
"No."
"How soon can you get in here?  And why didn't you come in with the
Wentworths?"
I fell into the water too -- first -- and I was going to just get some clothes
on and then come immediately, but I was shivering so violently by the time I
got into the house that I needed to get warm in a hot bath."
"Okay --that was a good idea.  Well, come quickly as you can -- and drive
safely!  We don't need you to be brought in here in an ambulance!  He has
been asking for you."
"So he's awake?"
"No, not really.  He has -- it's more like he's dreaming about you.  We can't
seem to arouse him. Maybe you will be able to."
"I'll be right there!"
"Drive CAREFULLY!"
"I will!"
I hung up and keyed in my brother's number.
"Chris? Can you come to the E.R. at St. Francis?  I -- need you.  Brian's had
an accident.  I have to get over there!  I'll explain when you get there."
"Of course!  I'll be right there, Bro!"
*******************************************************
Chris and Craig arrived in the E.R. parking at the same time as I did.  I
filled him in on what happened.  When we got there, Morty was waiting for us
-- me.  "Can you guys wait here?" he said to Chris. And he whisked me past
the entry door, and to Brian's side.
"Seth?  Seth, please answer me?  Please wake up, Seth!" Brian said.
"I'm here, Bri!  I'm here!"
"SETH!!  Where did you go!??"
"That's the first time he has said anything besides the first thing he said.
  He must sense you are here or something.  I don't know, but he seems to be
more agitated with you here.
"Seth?  Seth, please answer me?  Please wake up, Seth!" Brian said again.
I took his hand.  His body jumped!  He jerked his hand away.  "No!  NO!!
You can't!" He yelled.  "No!  Don't go!  They only want me!  You're too
young, Seth!"
"What, Bri?  What am I too young for?"
"Don't go, Seth.  Stay AWAY from the light!  They only want ME!  NOOOO Seth!
  Stop!"
I lost it.  I jumped on top of him and held him.  "Brian!" I cried! "I'm
right here!" I yelled!
"That's right, Baby," he said.  "Come away from the light. Hold me for a
minute, Baby."
I held him with everything I had!  "Bye, baby.  They are going to close off
the light if I don't go now. Bye baby."
No!  No!  NO NO NO!!!"  I screamed!
All of a sudden his body went limp, and he stopped breathing!
"Move!  Seth, MOVE!!"  Morty yelled.  I jumped off and they immediately put
the anode and diode to his chest and shot a jolt of electricity into him.
I've seen it done in movies, but I was not prepared.  His body jumped about
18" off the table!  The doctors had to catch him!  His eyes popped open he
looked all around the room and then started to shake.  His eyes stayed open
but got that now familiar glazed over look and he started to shake
violently!
"Grand MAL!" Morty yelled.  Almost immediately a nurse appeared with a stick
and a clamp.  Morty jammed the stick between Brian's back teeth and hooked
the clamp into his tongue.  The two doctors and two nurses, both males, held
him down, while he shook violently.  Finally he stopped and his eyes closed.
"Seth, you better wait in the outer room.  I'll let you know if there is any
change."
I kept repeating it in my head. "If there is any change!"
Tommy, show him out to the waiting room.  Tommy, a very gentle male nurse
guided me to the waiting room.  I spotted Craig.  I was so stunned I didn't
even ask where Chris was.  Craig beckoned me next to him.  I sat down and
lay my head on his shoulder.  Soon my brother was back from the bathroom and
he took my hand.  I was lying back on Craig and looking at the ceiling.
"Seth.  What happened in there?  We heard yelling!"
I shook my head.  "He said he would let me know if there was any change."  I
said to nobody in particular.
"What did he mean?  Change form what?" Chris said.
I raised up from my position on Craig and leaned over onto my brother, and
broke down and cried and sobbed for about five minutes.  Finally I stopped
enough to say, "I -- I -- I -- don't -- don't -- KNOW!  Chris, THEY don't know.
I just have to WAIT!"  and I started sobbing anew.
"Seth?"
I looked up and Morty was standing there.  I saw the look on his face and
said, "NOOOOoooooo!"
"Seth, - he -- wants to see you."
"You mean he's not  - "
"He'll be fine.  But he needs to rest.  But first he needs to see that you
are okay.  He's got a nasty bump on his head and probably will have a bad
headache, but right now he needs to rest."

I got up shakily.  I grabbed both Chris and Craig's hands and dragged them
with me.  When I got into Brian's cubicle, he said something I couldn't
hear.  I hugged him and he repeated, "Are you all right, my Baby?"
I somehow held it together.  "I'm fine, Bri.  You got hit on the head pretty
hard."
"Did you get Morty's boat back okay?"
"It's fine.  Not even a dent where it hit your hard head!"
"Okay, now.  Brian you need to rest." Morty said.  "I have ordered an
immediate prescription for the med that I gave you last night.  As soon as
it gets here, Tommy will help you take it and then take you to a room.
Seth, just go home and stay next to the phone, k?"
"K."
As we were walking back to the parking lot, I asked, "Can you guys come back
to our place.  I just don't think I can be alone right now."
"Sure.  Let Craig drive your car."
"K."
"Cool!" Said Craig.  I smiled weakly.
When we got back to Brian's, who was there waiting for us, but Rob.  I ran
to him and he picked me up like I was nothing and carried me to the door.  I
unlocked the door before we got there with the remote and Rob sat down on
the couch, still holding me.  I could hold it in no longer!  I started to
sob even more than at the hospital.  Rob was so warm and felt so safe and
wonderful!  I was sitting on his lap like a little boy, and was crying on
his shoulder!  Craig sat on one side and Chris sat on the floor at our feet.
  Chris rubbed my leg and Craig my shoulder.  Rob kept repeating, "It's okay
little brother let it out.  It's okay!"
The phone woke me up.  I was in the bedroom and on the bed, covered with a
blanket.  "Just a minute", I heard one of the guys say, from behind the
door.  Chris peeked in.  "You awake, Bro?" he whispered.
"Yeah!  What is it?"
"Here." He handed me the phone.
"Can you come and get me, baby?  The rent here is terribly high!"  He
sounded weak still, but my heart swelled at the love I felt and I relaxed
even more, with the relief.
"We'll be right there!"
"We?"
"Chris and Craig and Rob stayed with me."
"Of COURSE they did!  See you in a few, Baby!"

Notes:  Ain't family great?  Comments, as usual are always welcome and
solicited!  Please put "Seth" in the subject line and send them to Steve at
s4d@hotmail.com.  Thanks and love!  Steve