Date: Thu, 27 May 2004 11:40:05 -0700 From: Steve Thomas <s4d@hotmail.com> Subject: Coles-Dreams Ch. 4 This is a work of pure fiction, based on the author's feelings, beliefs, and in some cases, experience. There may be graphic sexual encounters at times between men, so if this offends you, you are invited to retreat. If you are too young or it is otherwise illegal for you to be reading this kind if story, shame on you for reading it - - please stop here. If not, - - ENJOY! Cast of Characters: Cole Alexander Stephanson IV -- Our hero Jazz -- Coles oldest brother Rod -- Coles middle brother Igor -- Cole's Tutoring Pupil Cole Alexander Stephanson III -- Coles Dad Ethyl Stephanson -- Cole's mom Rex -- Rod's best friend From Chapter 3: "NO! I want to -- I want you to -- show me -- I want to -- do something! Tonight!" "Not gonna happen!" in he said in his best George Bush senior impression. "Aw, c'mon, Iggy! That's not very nice! It's not fair!" "Cole, it's more than fair. I don't want you to ever say that I took advantage of you. And when -- and if -- we do decide to `do something', as you put it, I want you completely sober and in full control -- so I know it is totally your own rational decision - and you are doing it -- for me." "Then let's go back to the coffee house!" I said, rebelliously. He simply leaned over and kissed my lips. I kissed him back with a passion I never felt before. "Home, James?" He asked. I nodded. He was true to his word. We didn't "do something" -- at least anything new. But we did have a great make out session -- in the bed -- and a good mutual wank! And in the morning? Well, I felt CERTAIN that he respected me! Chapter 4 Yeah, I felt respected - - but - - disappointed -- even in the morning when I woke up. But I realized he was right -- even last night when my judgment was not its best. But as I lay there watching Iggy sleep, and thought about how he kissed me as I went off, my already stiff morning wood began to ache. My hormones were raging, my gonads ached, and my instincts were crying out! I took a long, deep shuddering breath. "Wow! That sounded heavy!" Iggy said. I hadn't noticed when he opened his eyes. "You okay?" I looked over to be sure that we locked the bedroom door, and then attacked him. He averted his face. "Morning dragon breath! Beware! Beware!" "Yeah, and I gotta pee so bad it hurts. Be right back." I jumped up, unlocked and opened my door and guarding my wood, skipped across the hall into the bathroom. I brushed my teeth while I was there. Iggy did the same as soon as I got back and then came back to the room, being sure to relock the door. Then he climbed under the covers with me, and started to kiss me all over my head and neck. I started to moan and he said, "We better wait. No telling who can hear us." At that, I besieged him in a tickle attack. We giggled and wrestled like a couple of little boys. In no time both of us were up and as hard as we were before we peed. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK! "Just a minute!" I hollered. I went to the door, cracking it open, and shielding my wood behind it. It was Jazz. "Are you okay this morning?" he said, craning his neck to try to see around the door. "I'm fine, Jazzy. Sorry I had to leave the party early last night." "Are you guys going to church with us?" I turned to Iggy and gave him a chagrinned look. He shrugged and nodded. "Sure. 9:00 service?" "It's 8:30 now." Jazz said. "I think we better make the 11:00. That'll give mom plenty of time to get breakfast on, too. I woke up famished! I don't know about you." We boys always went to church -- at least when we lived at home. Mom and Dad always took us when we were younger. They never went, but dropped us off and came back and picked us up. I never questioned the rationale in that. In our church, the pastor usually was the one to conduct the meeting. He conducted it as a class rather than a sermon. That way, church could fit neatly into an hour, and not impact everyone's day in any negative way. As luck would have it, his sermon was on morality. When he got into the "sin" of homosexuality, which I pretty much accepted up until that point, Iggy stood and said, "Sir, I am gay. I didn't choose to be gay. I would not choose it if there was a choice. But nevertheless, I am attracted to men. Did God make me this way to deny me the joys of this life?" "Son," the pastor started, "God doesn't make us one way or the other. Each of us is born into different situations. Paul speaks of a `thorn in the flesh' that he must live with. Perhaps your thorn is being more attracted to men than women." "You don't understand, sir," Iggy said, "I am not in the least attracted to girls. I tried to be -- more than you could ever know. I wanted to normal! But I'm just not. What do you suggest for me?" "Abstinence. It's the only way you will be saved." "Pastor, when I was in high school, I accepted Jesus into my heart, and as I understood that, I was already saved, as long as I accepted Him and trusted in his power to save me. Isn't that what you teach? I still love my Savior and feel his love for me. I believe he understands my situation and has a place for me in his kingdom." The preacher was confounded. I had heard him many times preach that once you are saved, nothing can take that away from you. "Son, all you have to do is repent. Then - " "Repent of what? Loving people?" Iggy said. "I repent all right. I repent of listening to so-called men of God, telling me that what I have no power to change is sinful." Then Iggy walked out of the service. I watched him going up the aisle to the door, looked at each of my brothers, back at Iggy, then into Jazz's eyes. He nodded to me. I followed Iggy. He didn't see me following and when he got outside, he fled around the corner into some bushes. When I got there, he was crying. He stopped when he saw me. "I'm sorry, man! I had no right to spout off like that in your church! I just get so -- so -- angry that -- that -- people can't accept that we are the way we are. I DO love God! And I believe he loves me! If being gay is a sin, then I believe He will forgive me. I believe he has power to do that. But Cole, I can't believe that he condemns me for just being me. Maybe I shouldn't fool around with other guys -- until I find the one I want to stay with, but most guys do that. MOST guys sleep around and then marry one girl. And half of them divorce. And it doesn't seem to matter if they are church-goers or not. Oh, Cole, you must hate me! I'm so ashamed I couldn't keep my mouth shut. But - - but - - " "You don't need to apologize, Iggy. I totally understand. And agree! I don't go to that church any more." "But your brothers - " "They don't go there any more either. Don't sweat it, Dude. It's okay. I -- hope -- you can teach me -- a little more -- about how you believe. I learned a lot today." I wanted to put my arms around him and tell him I loved him. But I didn't. I at least was going to put my arms around him when Rod came up behind us -- then Jazz. "I always thought Rev. Wilson was a hypocrite." Rod said. "Now I'm sure of it. Where does he get that stuff?" "He's okay." Jazz said. "He's just a little old fashioned. Can't accept new things easily, maybe." "I don't know," Rod said, "mom has never liked him." "So - - why did they always make us go -- when they didn't?" I asked "Mom just felt that we needed some church teaching, Cole. And this church was dad's family religion, so she thought best that we go there. It used to be that a woman just accepted her husband's religion, if it was different from hers." Jazz said. "It's not a bad idea for two married people to agree on a religion -- especially where kids are involved." "I think that would be a deal breaker." Rod said. Iggy was looking from one brother to the other as we discussed our religious upbringing in the bushes. "Deal breaker?" Iggy mused. "Yeah. If a woman doesn't believe in her husband's religion, then how is she going to all of a sudden believe it just because they get married? Especially where kids are involved -- I think they should agree." "I think Mom and Dad believe the same." Jazz said. "Yeah," said Rod, "They believe that they shouldn't go to church." He smiled. "I know how they believe." I said. "I've talked to them about it -- individually. She doesn't believe in God as such. She believes we are all our own God, and all the praying she used to talk about? It was self talk. She prayed all right, and believed that her self talk could motivate her to make changes in her life -- and others. Dad believes that there is some power that created everything. Whether it is a "God" or not is in question. And he never prays." "I think I want to find a church that doesn't condemn gays as sinful." Iggy said. I kept my real thoughts to myself. I still was not so sure that it WASN'T sinful. But since the other night, when Iggy showed me the passage about the seed-spilling incident, I was really kind of wanting him to convince me about -- other things too. ญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญญ"Won't you at least stay for lunch?" "Naw, Mom." Jazz said. "I have a long way to drive, and I want to see Brooke and the kids before they go to bed. Tell Dad bye for me." He kissed her and left. Dad was off golfing. Rod, Iggy and I -- and Mom -- sat down at the table. She had made peanut butter, mayonnaise and lettuce sandwiches with apple slices and milk. "How was church today?" Mom asked. "Peanut butter and mayonnaise?" Iggy quickly changed the subject. "That's different." "Oh. You never had it?" Mom said. "It's one of our family's favorites. Did Rev. Wilson have any bombs to drop -- er, I mean new gems for you to take with you today?" "Oh, I'll have to try it." Said Iggy as he took a big bite of his sandwich. MMMmmm! This IS good! Is it only peanut butter and mayo?" "Well, besides the lettuce, there is some butter on the bread. Rev. Wilson always - " "And it's very good with the apples!" Iggy hurried to point out. "Peanut butter, mayonnaise, and lettuce sandwiches with apples and milk! I'm going to have to remember that one! You're a wonderful cook, Mrs. Stephanson!" "Thank you dear!" That was the last we heard about church. DING DONG! The door bell rang and the door opened. "Anyone home?" It was Rex. "Come in Dear!" Mom said. "Have a sandwich! I can make more if we run out!" "No thanks, Ethyl. I just ate. I was just wondering when Roddy was going back and if we could hang out awhile again today." He was talking to Mom, directing a question to Rod, and staring at Iggy, smiling. I felt two twinges of emotion. Now that I knew that Rex was gay, I looked at him as I never had before. He was just my brother's friend before. And he was not all that great looking when they were in school together. But now he looked a lot more handsome to me. And his smile was very cute and sexy. But I was wishing it was directed to me! Also I was feeling jealousy. That he was so interested in Iggy. Maybe he thought I was still off limits. Maybe he still thought of me as a kid. But what bothered me the most was the return looks he was getting from Iggy. I felt like running out of the room, but I stayed, and rationalized the situation. Iggy and I didn't have any kind of arrangement with each other -- except to tutor him. Maybe he just thought of me as a jack-off buddy. But the way he kissed me! Well, maybe he just liked to kiss. God! I knew I did! From what he told me last night, I thought maybe he was interested -- in me. I was trying to think of some innocent flirty thing to say to Rex when he looked at me in the same way he did Iggy. "Hiya, Scrub! How's my favorite kid brother?" He and Rod used to call me that. He smiled even bigger and winked at me. "Still your favorite, I hope!" was all I could think of. I winked back! I then felt my cheeks burning. I couldn't believe I was actually flirting with Rex! Iggy was wagging his head between the two of us. "Can't do it today, Rex." Rod said. I gotta run. I only stayed for lunch. Didn't wanna hurt my mommy's feelings. But I'm sure that the Scrub and Ig could figure a way to entertain you, between the two of them." I didn't know if Rod meant that to sound the way I took it, but just thinking about Rex between Iggy and me made me start to get hard. Then Rod looked at me and HE winked. He DID mean it that way! So was he telling me it was okay to -- I mean, I have heard of - but no! I could never -- could I? "How about I take you both on!" Iggy said. I was just about to piss my pants when he continued. "I'll bet you I can beat you both at tennis -- me on one side of the net and the two of you on the other side!" "You're on, Iggy! And without Roddy there, we can take turns with the Scrub in the showers!" I wondered if my mom had any idea what he was talking about. By this time My boner was raging -- as any 20-year-old's would have been! Well, any GAY 20-year-old, anyway! We finished lunch, said goodbye to Rod, and then headed for the club. The club had racquetball and tennis courts, and a workout room, as well as a swimming pool, a hot tub and sauna and steam rooms next to the locker rooms. There were a set for each of the men's and women's sides. Iggy was all over the court trying to beat us, but Rex and I proved too much for him. As we were getting our tennis clothes off, Rex said, "Let's hit the steam room." We started and he said, "Grab your towels." The steam room was so dense with steam it was hard to see two inches from your nose. We were the only ones there, and as soon as the door was shut, Rex grabbed me and pulled me into a deep kiss. I was so surprised, and even more so as I kissed him back, forgetting momentarily that Iggy was also there. I didn't forget for long, because a moment later, I felt him behind me. He closed in on my rear and started kissing my neck, and with his arms around my chest, he massaged my pecs, and gently squeezed my nipples. My arms were around Rex's back and his hands were on my butt, kneading it, and pushing his groin into mine. We were both hard as steel, and I could also feel a rock-hard shaft teasing my crack from the rear. As Rex was humping me from the front, and Iggy from the rear, all the sweat and steam made it nice and slippery. Then Rex craned his neck over my shoulder and, as they both humped me, their lips met over my shoulder. My mouth was devouring Rex's neck and shoulder. The door to the steam room opened. We sprang apart quietly. It was too steamy to see anything. "C'mon, let's go to the sauna." Rex said. There was no steam in the sauna, but we sat in there, our towels covering our excitement, until we could go into the showers. When we got into the showers, two other guys -- old men -- were there. We showered off and went back to our lockers. I had worked myself up to a half-boner again and tried to keep it hidden until my underwear was on. We had taken my car to the sports club. It has a bench seat in the front, so we could all sit in the front seat. As soon as we were out of the parking lot, we all started laughing insanely. "Oh my God!" Rex said. I haven't had so much fun since - " He paused too long. "Since what?" I prodded. Rex grew almost morose. Then, "You remember Gus Hartwin?" "You knew him? He was in my class." I said. "Of course I remember him. He was the Homecoming King and football hero in my senior year. One of the most popular guys in school." Rex clouded up. "He was my boyfriend for the last 2 years. We broke up two months ago." He paused long enough for my mouth to close and my eyes to get back to normal. "I was actually sitting over in my room wondering if life without him was worth living when Roddy called and asked me to come play with you guys, yesterday. "You mean you were thinking of -- oh, Rex!" I cried. "Nothing -- nobody -- is worth - " "Naw, I wouldn't ever off myself. But I was pretty low. And now you guys have made me almost forget for a moment." "I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, Rex." Iggy said. "It's been a year since I was interested in doing anything outside myself -- same reason. When Jacob walked out of my life, the lights went out." "Well, Rex, I can tell we're gonna be spending a lot of weekends here!" I said. "I have really missed all your harassing and teasing, since Roddy went off to school." "I know!" Rex said. "I thought I would die then too." "Oh! Did he know you were stuck on him?" I said. "Oh, it wasn't HIM -- it was -- uhhhh -- oh! Well, it wasn't long after that I met Gus. He was a good - - - " "good what?" I queried. "Substitute!" "For Roddy?" I said. "No -- for Roddy's little brother -- SCRUB!" "Oh my gosh, Rex. I had no idea. I -- I felt the same about you -- except -- except -- I couldn't bring myself to admit it." "So! You two had the hots for each other and didn't even know it!" Iggy said, trying to lighten things up a little. "I -- guess." I said. "You were only thirteen when I first noticed how cute you were, Cole!" Rex looked like he was remembering a dream. "I was 16, and my God, to see you, all skinny and tall, and brown as a bear, the way you tan so easily! Those big brown, gorgeous eyes! I told your brother I was gay -- and that was okay with him -- well, after it weirded him out a little. But when I mentioned I liked you, he freaked! I dropped it, because Rod was -- and is -- the best friend I ever had." "Can I ask you guys something?" I asked. "You too, Iggy -- you're older than I am too. Do you see me as a -- a -- kid?" "I -- guess I do." Was Iggy's immediate remark. "But I see myself as a kid too, even though I'm 21. I see both of us as kids." I liked that response. It was exactly how I felt myself. "I don't -- well, I guess I still think of you as younger, Scrub, but not exactly as a kid." Rex said. "One thing's for sure. I think of you differently than I used to!" "Duh! I hope so!" I said. "I used to think of you as cute. You're still cute as hell -- but now I see you as - - hot!" "I'll second that emotion!" Said Iggy. "Can I ask you guys something else?" "Anything, Scrub! Ask away!" "Well -- I -- uh -- you guys are more experienced than I am -- I guess -- and -- well, I uh -- was -- uh -- just -- uh -- wondering, uhhhhm - " I stopped talking and my face filled up with blood. "Go on, it's okay -- anything, Cole." This time Rex was more serious -- even concerned. Iggy nodded his assent. "I feel like a fool -- like I am a selfish little kid -- like a kid in a candy store -- and he has to choose one piece of candy. I want them both!" I said. "I mean both of you!" Iggy was the first to laugh, then Rex started. I really felt like a stupid little kid now! I hated being laughed at! We were in front of my house, so I stopped, and ran from the car. I ran around the side of the house to the field out back. I sat down among the high weeds Soon there were voices. "Scrub, where did you go?" "Cole -- where are you?" "Over there -- in the bushes." "Cole -- come out. We weren't laughing at you!" I was this close to crying, but I held on. "You -- you weren't?" I whispered. I stood up. Both guys were standing there looking concerned. "Well, not exactly." Rex said. He looked at Iggy, "You ever done a three-some?" Iggy's face lit up in a wide smile. "No -- not -- yet!" He looked at me, and I then looked at Rex. Rex was now smiling too. I said, "I -- I was afraid -- to -- er -- that I would hurt your feelings -- one of you. I just don't think I'm ready for -- um -- well, to have just one boyfriend." "Well, HELL, Scrub, I'm already the ripe old age of 23 -- I've done that - and I'm not ready for that either - at least not now! You, Iggy?" Iggy answered, "I -- er -- didn't want to hurt Cole's feelings, but -- no. I'm not a whore -- just looking for sex with anything that walks, but -- with you guys -- I - " "Oh!" Rex said. "You thought I meant with YOU?" "I just assumed - " said Iggy, now looking confused. "I'm kidding! Boy, you guys need to lighten up! Where can we do it? My house is out -- and I assume your's is too, Cole." "Ahem!" Iggy asserted. "There's my dorm room." "Oh, Shit yeah!" Rex said. "Tonight?" I was getting a little scared. I never did anything with anyone yet, and now I'm thinking about a 3-some? Both guys looked at me. "You okay, Scrub?" "I -- I'm not -- uh -- sure." "Well, I don't wanna rush you." I definitely felt rushed! But I wanted this so much I could taste it! My mind was racing faster than I could process it. Finally I said, "I -- uhhh -- (sigh!) Let's do it!" "You sure, scrub?" "NO, DAMMIT! But let's do it anyway! I -- I -- I'll take the responsibility! Don't worry, Rex, I won't blame anyone else, if I feel bad about it later. Right now I want it. I WANT IT!" There were some people at the other end of the field who heard me and stared. But I calmed down and whispered, "Let's just do it!" Note: I don't think Cole has any idea what's in store for him. And you know what? Neither do I! It may depend on if I get any myself tonight! You can only guess how that would color my story! At any rate, I love all your comments, and always will answer quickly. Put "Cole" in the subject line and address them to Steve at s4d@hotmail.com. Thanks and love, Steve Bottom line: Love will Rule in the end.