Date: Sat, 31 Mar 2001 16:41:47 +0100
From: Ardveche <ardveche@hotmail.com>
Subject: Educating Alex 4

APOLOGIA

========

Okay, so I said that the last chapter might be the last one, but I'm too
attached to Alex to stop now, so I'm writing another one.  But at some
point I really must get on and write the final part of New to this State,
before someone lynches me.  When we left our intrepid heroes, they had just
declared their love for one another.  This chapter, like the rest, picks up
some time later.  I'll do my best to keep the flashbacks to a minimum.  Oh,
and don't forget to visit the all new website: http://www.ardveche.com.


DISCLAIMER

==========

This is a work of fiction; any resemblance to persons living or dead is
entirely coincidental. The author asserts all legal and moral rights
(copyright (c) 2001 - www.ardveche.com) to this work and you may not copy
it or transmit it in any way except in its entirety and with this
disclaimer. This story features descriptions of sex between adult males:

- if such material is prohibited in your jurisdiction, please DO NOT READ ON,
- if you're under the legal age to read such material, please DO NOT READ ON,
- if you don't like, or are offended by such material, please DO NOT READ ON.

Now, if everyone who is still here is meant to be here or at least aware
they shouldn't be, let's get on with it.  All comments are welcome and
gratefully received (email them to ardveche@ardveche.com).


EDUCATING ALEX IV

=================

I had been floating, walking on air, since the day Alex told me he loved
me.  Well, strictly since he said he 'thought' he loved me.  But he'd said
it again, more emphatically that night as we lay together in bed talking
about all that had happened since we had been together.  The only
relationship I had ever been in which had lasted longer than this was with
John, and we had never really been in love, never said it, never felt it.
With Alex, though, I had known I loved him almost from the start, and to
finally hear him say that he loved me too made me the happiest man in the
world.  He had a quality about him I can't really explain, a sweetness and
decency that made not loving him utterly impossible.  Still, it seemed like
a dream and I was constantly expecting to wake up.

By Monday Alex was feeling much better and was well enough again to get up
and get dressed, and although he was still snuffling a bit he went to his
classes exactly as normal.  He seemed a lot more confident about it since
Blair's visit, and although nothing bad had happened to him after the movie
theater 'incident' I was worried that Derek would not let things rest.  It
seemed I was doing all the worrying for both of us.  But that was very like
Alex, to ignore a thing until it actually happened, which might well
explain the problems with his grades.  That was another thing I worried
more about than he, and I was on tenterhooks until Wednesday and he
returned from his meeting with Matt Rogers.

"Well?"  I demanded as soon as I heard him coming in the door.  I closed
the book I had been pretending to read and stood to face Alex as he entered
the living room.  I had expected him back hours earlier and had really
begun to worry.  But his appearance showed me where he had been, he was
wearing sweatpants and a baggy sweatshirt and was a little flushed.  He
must have been running, which suggested he had frustrations he wanted to
work off.

"Fine thanks."  He replied with a grin, throwing his backpack onto the
chair.  "You?"

"Stop it, Alex.  I don't want to play this game today; I just want you to
tell me how the meeting went.  What did he say?"

"Jeez, Ryan, calm down.  I'm just in the door, buddy."  He walked past me
toward the kitchen.  "Can I get something to drink first?"

"I guess."  If it had gone badly, desperate though I was to know, it would
only make him clam up completely if I kept pushing.

"You want anything?"  He asked stooping to get the orange juice from the
fridge.

"Only to know what Rogers said."

"He said I'm screwed.  That I should pack up and get the hell out of
Dodge."

"What?"  I practically yelled. "No!  There must be something we can do."

"Man, you're too easy."  He laughed aloud at the expression on my face.

"Oh very funny.  I thought I said I didn't want to play?"

"Yeah, you did.  But you're cute when you're all righteously indignant."
He grinned and clapped me on the shoulder, taking a long pull of orange
juice - straight from the bottle!  This time I decided to say nothing.

"And you are going to tell me what he really said, or you're going to
regret it."  I jabbed my fingers in his gut, making him splutter and lose
some of the juice down the front of his shirt.

"After a shower.  I stink."

"So what's new?"

"Funny."  He walked back past me, determinedly telling me nothing, pulling
his shirt off as he went.  "Wanna throw this in the laundry for me, my
love?"

"Put like that, how can I refuse?"  I said, my voice heavy with irony, but
I accepted the shirt from him anyway.  "How about those pants, they look
like they could use a wash too."  I added with a wink.

"You have a one track mind, Thomson."  Alex responded, kicking off his
running shoes and struggling out of his sweatpants.  "Thanks, man, I won't
be long, 'kay?"  He asked, suddenly serious standing in front of me in just
his shorts.

"Take your time.  Is there anything else to wash?"

"Um, a T-shirt in the backpack, I guess.  I think that's everything."  He
shrugged, a particularly eloquent gesture with his torso bare, and one that
brought a surprising number of muscles into play!  "It's okay, though, I'll
do it."

"It's okay, my master, I'll deal with it."  I pressed the palms of my hands
together and bowed low to him, like Genie from that old show with Larry
Hagman.

"Attaboy."  He sauntered off to take his shower and I dealt with the
laundry.  He took longer than I had expected, so I phoned for Chinese while
I waited and opened a bottle of wine for the two of us.  I figured he might
want to relax.  He took his time in the bathroom, and I put a CD on while I
waited, more or less patiently.  Finally, Alex padded barefoot back into
the living room, vigorously toweling his hair as he walked.  He had jeans
on now, and a T-shirt thrown over one shoulder, looking for all the world
as though he was auditioning for a shampoo commercial.  I turned the stereo
down; Carmen was playing as I had flicked through the libretto, my mind on
neither the words nor the music.

"Feel better?"  I asked as he pulled the shirt on and plopped down beside
me.

"Much.  Man, I needed that."

"Yes.  You did."  I grinned at him and he bared his teeth back at me.  "So,
you wanna tell me what happened today, 'my love'?"  I asked turning
sideways to face him.

"It went really well, actually.  Matt was a big help."

"Matt now?"

"Yup.  Oh, didn't I say?  I'm leaving you for him."

"Get on with the story, you asshole."

"Charming."  Alex sidled closer on the couch and slid one bare arm round my
shoulder, I allowed him to be affectionate, hoping that I'd get the story
sooner if I did.  "He said I was doing too badly in some classes to pass,
that I should cut my losses on a couple of them this semester.  Concentrate
on the ones I have a chance of passing, you know?"  I nodded, to show that
I did indeed know.

"And then?"

"Well, I can take some extra classes next semester to make up the credits.
Maybe a couple easier ones?"

"I see."

"And if I still don't have enough credit, well there's summer classes,
maybe something at night?  Or if it comes down to it I can maybe take an
extra semester."  He shrugged expressively and pursed his lips.  The idea
of extra courses didn't appeal to him, clearly, and it would cut into his
practice time, but at least he was safe from being thrown out for the time
being.

"So things are not as black as you thought?"  It all sounded pretty
encouraging to me.

"Well, there's a bit more."

"Oh?  What?"  I was concerned again and fixed my eyes on is, but he bowed
his head and wouldn't meet my gaze.  When he finally spoke, his voice was
very quiet.

"My scholarship."  He explained, or failed to explain.  I was about to quiz
him further when the doorbell rang, and I realized the food must have
arrived.  "I'll get it!"  He practically bounded to his feet and
half-jogged to the door.  I sighed heavily and went through to the kitchen
to get the chopsticks (and a fork for Alex), glasses and the bottle of wine
all of which I set on the coffee table.  Alex bounded back into the room
with a collection of boxes, which he thrust at me and began to rummage
through the pockets of a discarded coat.

"What did you lose?"

"Money."

"Ah.  My wallet's by the phone."  I nodded in that direction.

"S'okay.  I've got it."

"Whatever."  I placed all the boxes on the table as he yanked a crumpled
wad of bills from his coat pocket with a triumphant grin.  "My hero."

"I know."  And he trotted off to pay the guy, who was still standing by the
door.  I had a feeling we'd be getting no more of the story until after we
ate.  I had played this game with Alex often enough to know that no amount
of quizzing would make him talk if he wasn't ready to do so.  When he
returned he flopped down into the chair again and began opening boxes and
sniffing the contents suspiciously.  Alex was a relative newcomer to
Chinese food, and was still cautious around it.  He'd attempted chopsticks
once, but had made a real mess of things with them, giving up and switching
to a fork before he died of starvation.

"Smells good."

"Glad you approve."  I think something in my tone must have alerted him to
the fact that I was still waiting for the rest of the story.  He offered me
a wide, toothy smile and a wink.

"After we eat, okay?"

"Okay.  But don't put me off again, or I will have to hurt you.
Understand?"  To his great credit, Alex didn't spit any food on me as he
laughed at that suggestion.

"Deal."  We ate pretty much in silence after that, breaking it only
occasionally to ask one another to pass the soy sauce, or a particular
dish, or to pour more wine.  It wasn't an awkward silence though; we were
just both thinking our own thoughts.  After a really enjoyable meal, Alex
made the coffee while I washed the wine glasses and we returned to the
living room for a comfortable seat.

"So?"  I said, drawing out the vowel sound and fixing him with a stare.

"So.  It may not come to anything, but with my GPA being so low they might
cancel my scholarship."  He shrugged.  "I'd get to stay on the team, but
I'd have to find the money from somewhere else.  And I can't afford to stay
without the scholarship.  Well, I can, if I get a job, but then I won't
have time to practice."

"That's bad."  I didn't know what to say, I had no solution to offer.

"Yup."

"What's the solution?"

"I don't know.  Matt said he'd write to the trustees for me and ask them to
be flexible.  I'll speak to the Coach too and see if he'll do the same."
Another shrug.  "All I can do is wait and see."

"Well, you know that if I can do anything at all, help you study, whatever.
I'll do it."  I put my hand on his knee and he covered it with his own.
"Or, you know, if you just need to vent, or want a shoulder to cry on, I'm
here for you."

"I know.  Thanks, Ryan.  That means a lot to me."  He leaned towards me and
we kissed one another lightly on the lips, as he sat back he fixed his big,
brown eyes on mine and with his free hand brushed my hair aside.  "I really
do love you."

"I love you, too."  I kissed him again and slid a little closer, letting
him put an arm round my shoulder again and wriggling slightly to make
myself more comfortable against him.

"So.  Let's change the subject, okay?"

"Sure.  Did you have a good run?"

"Yeah.  Great, got down to the river and back more than a minute faster
than usual."

"Good for you."  It didn't surprise me; he was in peak condition, his body
trimmer and more solid than ever before.  When he swam or ran, he was pure
poetry.  It didn't seem to matter in the least which element it was, he cut
through either with equal ease and grace.  I've told you before how much I
enjoyed watching him compete, and it was true.

"Yup.  Needed to blow off some steam."

"I bet.  You want another of my world famous back rubs?"

"Oh, yeah!  That'd be great."  He grinned an evil little grin.  "How about
more than just my back, though?"

"Well..." I pretended reluctance.  "I might need to be persuaded."

"I think I can manage that."  And he pulled me towards him, wrapping his
powerful arms around me and drawing me into a deep, delicious kiss.  I
allowed myself a small groan of pleasure as I wound my fingers into his
dirty-blond hair.  This form of 'persuasion' I was confident I could
'resist' for a good long time.  But I would give in eventually!  We twined
around each other, clutching one another's bodies.  Alex pushed me gently
back into the corner formed by the back and arm and we settled into a
series of long, slow kisses.

"Okay!  More than your back."  I was finally able to gasp as he let me up
for air and he gave a low chuckle, kissing the tip of my nose.

"Cool."

"Help me move the coffee table?"

"Okay."  Together we moved it to one side clearing a large area of the
floor, more than big enough for him to stretch out full length.

"Get some towels, sexy."  I slapped his butt lightly. "Oh, and get the
massage oil, it's in the cabinet."

"Okay."  He obediently trotted off to the bathroom while I got a bowl of
ice water from the kitchen.  "Ta da!"  He returned with a big dopey grin on
his face, the one he always wore when he was happy, when he was getting his
own way!  I smiled back at him and began to take off my shirt.  "Here."  He
said, dropping the towels on the sofa and reaching for the buttons of my
shirt.  "Let me."

"You'll get no argument from me!"

"Good!"  And he ensured that he wouldn't by kissing me again.  His
dexterous fingers swiftly undid the buttons on my shirt and slid it down
off my shoulders.  I shuddered as his fingers found my nipples and his
tongue and lips made a slow, delicate journey along my jaw and down my neck
to my collarbone.  As he tweaked gently, my hands came up and grasped his
smooth, strong biceps tightly, another soft gasp escaping my lips.  "Like
that, huh?"  He asked quietly, his hands drifting round to my back and
drawing me still closer, pressing my crotch against his.  I knew I wasn't
the only one who was thoroughly enjoying this.

We held that position for a while longer, kissing and stroking until he
drew away, I moved my head forward to catch him, my eyes snapping open, but
was disappointed as he held me still and moved out of reach.  With a wink,
he pulled the T-shirt up over his head and tossed it aside.  I reached for
the buttons of his jeans and quickly had them down round his ankles, Alex
leant on my shoulder to step out of them and I stayed on my haunches for a
moment looking up at his incredible beauty.  He looked down at me with a
grin and slid his shorts down, kicking them to one side.  He was now
completely naked as he lowered himself to the floor and sat on the towels,
his long legs stretched out in front of him, leaning back on both hands.

"So..." He said, perfectly comfortable sitting there naked, grinning at me.

"On your face, Hayes."  I instructed, laughing at his expression, though I
was maybe just a little reluctant, as I was enjoying the view.  He rolled
over and stretched out flat on his front, crossing his arms in front of him
and resting his head on one side.  Now, that wasn't such a bad view either!

"I'm all yours."  He murmured.

"I know.  Now this may be a little cold."  I said, but only as I poured the
oil onto his back, so it wasn't much of a warning really.  He drew his
breath in sharply, and all the muscles in his back tightened.  I quickly
shucked my own pants and sat astride his legs and began to work the oil
across his back and shoulders, feeling him relax.  He sighed deeply and I
felt a little thrill run down my own spine.

"Mmm."

"Quite."  I concentrated on the job, moving further down as I worked yet
more oil (warmed by my hands this time!) over his lower back, skipping his
butt and on down his thighs, drawing my hands slowly and sensually along
his muscular legs.  He moved his legs apart slightly as I swung off him and
sat to one side, I was now very aroused myself and totally turned on by the
passivity of him lying there exposed to me.

"Mmm, you're so good, Ry."  He muttered, at least I think he did, but his
voice was so faint and muffled by his arm I couldn't be sure.

"The best, lover."  I leaned over him and kissed the back of his neck and
his shoulders, my hands making another long, slow journey down his back to
his firm buttocks.  After a few minutes of gentle massage, I startled him
from his stupor by landing a sharp slap on his cheek.

"Ow!"  He raised his head and tried to peer over his shoulder.

"Roll over, you're done."

"You're the boss."

"Remember that."  I sat back and waited as with a fluid, cat-like motion he
twisted his body.  Lying on his back, he twined his fingers together and
put both hands behind his head.  Not only did that make every muscle on his
torso stand out better than ever it raised his head enough for him to be
able to watch as my hands began their motion across his chest.  He smiled
gently and closed his eyes, trusting me completely and I shivered.

I made him give me one arm at a time, pulling them from behind his head,
and dragged my fingers back and forth along his muscles, enjoying the
solidity and the smoothness, the strength of his beautiful, sensual,
sensitive hands.  When I was done with his hands and arms, I traced my
fingers along his chest again, restoring the hardness to his nipples and
making him squirm a little.  I leaned forward and kissed his lips, his chin
and on down his sternum, turning first left and then right to swirl my
tongue around his nipples and bite them slightly, pulling them up and away
from his chest.  He giggled as I released him and ran my fingers down his
rib cage with little spidery movements.

"Ry."  He gasped, his hands swung out from behind his head with lightening
speed, catching both wrists tightly.  His eyes were sparkling when I looked
up into their brown depths.

"What?"  I inquired, all innocence.

"You know what."

I smiled at him and he released my wrists, allowing me to move away, again
skirting round his crotch, to run my hands down the front of his legs,
smoothing oil over their hairless perfection.  There could be no mistaking
his enjoyment.  I sat down, my own legs stretched out before me, his feet
between them; I took one of them in my hands and began to knead at the
soles.  For someone who could be so ticklish elsewhere, his feet were
surprisingly lacking in sensitivity.  When I finished working on his feet,
I crawled back up the length of his body and kissed him on the lips.

"I'm finished."  I whispered.

"What?"  His eyes flew open again; a look of puzzlement and confusion
clouded his beautiful features.  "What about..." He trailed off and nodded
towards his groin.

"Huh?"  I pretended not to understand him.

"I mean, are you going to leave me like this?"  There was a tiny hint of
frustration in his voice, as he pushed himself into a sitting position.

"Like what?"  But I could no longer keep a straight face, the way he was
looking at me, and I burst out laughing.  Realization dawned that I had
been teasing him and a look of understanding spread across his face.  I was
laughing so much there was no way I could even have tried to stop him as he
pounced, flicking me effortlessly onto my back and pinning my arms above my
head with one hand.  He was sitting astride me now, so I had no chance of
escape as he squirted a line of ice-cold oil across my chest.  I squealed
and squirmed as he proceeded to dig his fingers into my ribs, yanking my
hands free as I did.  The two of us rolled around on the floor, he still
had the bottle of oil in one hand and it went everywhere as we struggled
and wrestled.  The precaution of spreading towels out was utterly in vain,
but who cared?  Inevitably, Alex gained the upper hand, pinning me again he
yanked the waistband of my shorts away and squirted most of the bottle of
oil into them.  I howled as the cold hit my balls and instinctively tried
to curl into a little ball, but he kept me lying flat, and soon took my
mind off the cold by sliding his very, wonderfully, gloriously warm hand
down there as well.  I was soon naked too.

"And you think I have wonderful hands?"  I laughed into his shoulder as he
stroked back and forth, drawing his fingers the whole length of my shaft,
such that it was almost painful when he reached the crown.

"I learned from a master."  He replied quietly with a chuckle.

"Yeah, a masturbator!"

"That was not funny."  He gave a little squeeze after 'that' and 'not' as
though to punctuate his words, making me try to bring my knees together
again, but he soon made me think better of stopping him.  We rolled
together again and I trailed my fingers down his belly and took him gently
in my hand.  After that, we didn't last much longer, all attempts at
conversation ceased to be replaced by quiet gasps and moans as our two oil
covered bodies twisted around one another.  With one more moan, and a
strangled sound that might have been his name, I was pushed over the top
and Alex soon followed.  We lay together on our backs, in an untidy, oily
heap, holding hands and breathing heavily.

"Well, that was fun."  He finally said.

"Yup."  I squeezed his hand tightly.  "I hope you know, you're cleaning
this mess up."

"Okay."

"What?"  I sat up and looked at him quizzically.

"I said 'okay', I'll clean up.  But I need another shower first, join me?"

"Damn right, try to stop me."

"Nah.  Don't think I'll bother.  C'mon then."  I was yanked to my feet
sharply, kissed deeply and swung up into Alex's arms as he carried me
through to the bathroom singing (appallingly!) 'I will always looooooooove
you' as he walked.  I threw my arms round his neck and kissed him
repeatedly between peals of laughter as he kicked open the bathroom door.
We took a long, slow shower, savoring the refreshing feel of the water
cascading down over us and just kissing.  It was wonderful, and when we
collapsed on the bed much later I was tired, damp and happy.  The problems
and difficulties of the day were largely forgotten as Alex snuggled against
me and, whispering in my ear how much he loved me, we fell asleep.

The following day I was woken by the telephone's strident, insistent ring.
Alex was still cradling me against his chest, and I was reluctant to get up
and answer it.  Eventually, I heaved myself upright, Alex's arm sliding off
me (he can sleep through anything) and wandered unsteadily to get the
phone, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

"Hello?"  I croaked.

"Ryan?"

"Megan?"

"Hi, did I wake you?"

"Yes."

"Too bad, it's late already."  It was my younger sister calling from home.

"Where you are, it is."  I sighed.

"So, anyway, I'm coming to visit."

"Oh, you are, are you?  When?"

"I'll be there Friday night."

"Friday?  That's tomorrow!"  That was absolutely typical of my sister, to
give me so little notice.  The last time she had visited, the call had come
from the bus station, instructing me to come get her.

"Well, duh!"  She gave me her finest 'teenager talking to an adult' voice.
"Is that going to be a huge problem?"

"No.  No.  I guess not."

"You can be so welcoming."  She tried to sound hurt, but it wasn't working.

"I'm sorry, Megan, darling.  It's so good of you to visit me, please
forgive me."  I really camped it up and was rewarded with a piercing shriek
of laughter down the phone, which I had to hold away from my ear until she
stopped.

"You are so gay!"  She chided.

"Yup."

"And anyway, I'm not really visiting you, I just need to get out of here
for a while.  The parental units are acting up, and Daryl dumped me."

"Men can be such bastards."  I sympathized.

"I have the best brother!"  She laughed.  "You know exactly what to say.
If you weren't my brother, and gay and, you know, so old, I'd definitely
think about dating you."  Not much of a compliment, but you get what you
pay for.

"Listen, Meg, I'm standing here naked, so I gotta go put some clothes on
and get breakfast before class."  There was another bray of laughter.
"Call me and let me know when you're getting in, 'kay?"

"Okay.  Go dress, big brother, the thought of you naked is making me
nauseous."

"Thanks."

"Bye bye!"

"Bye, Meg.  See you Friday."  I hung up the phone and wandered back through
to the bedroom.  Alex was awake and lying on his back with his head propped
on a pile of pillows.

"Ooh, breakfast!"  He laughed as I walked into the room.

"Ha ha."  I slid back under the covers and ran a finger down his chest,
tracing the line of his sternum and making him giggle as my fingertip
dipped into and back out of his bellybutton, continuing along the little
trail of hair, but stopping just short of my target.

"Who was on the phone?"  He asked raising my hand to his lips and kissing
the tips of my fingers.

"My sister."

"Ah."  He kissed his way along my forearm to my elbow.

"Remember I told you she was pretty impulsive?"

"Mm?"  He was now kissing upwards to my shoulder.

"She's coming to visit."

"Oh?"  He kissed my neck, my ear, my jaw and finally my lips.

"Yeah, gets here tomorrow.  I don't know how long she'll stay for, probably
only a few days."

"She's not staying for your birthday?"  I was turning twenty-two in eight
days, but this was the first time Alex had mentioned it since, months
earlier, we had told each other when our respective birthdays were.  I was
instantly suspicious, he was definitely plotting something, but I had no
chance of finding out what, so I let it go.

"Nah, that's not why she's coming, she split up with her boyfriend and my
parents are hassling her.  Probably about school."

"Cool.  I've sort of been looking forward to meeting her."  He sat back to
look at me and smiled.

"Really?  You won't be weirded out having her in the house?"  I took his
hands and looked intently at him.  He could be funny at times about
anything public, though he had taken me aback a few times recently, I
couldn't stop myself from wondering how he would cope in a twenty-four hour
a day situation with someone in the house.  Whether he would find himself
hopelessly constrained and made to feel awkward in his home.

"Nope.  I'll be fine."

"Thanks, Alex."

"I thought we talked about not thanking each other the whole time?"  He
smiled at me and slid off the bed, padding towards the wardrobes to choose
something to wear, continuing to talk to me over his shoulder.  "And
anyway, I can always sleep on the couch."

"You better not even think about it!"  I joined him, sliding an arm around
his waist.

"What do you think, this one, or this?"  He pulled the sleeves of two
shirts out the wardrobe door for me to look at.

"The blue one."

"Yeah?"  He shrugged and pulled the whole shirt out, wandering away to
shower and leaving me to select my own outfit for the day ahead.  After a
quick breakfast we walked to town together at an easy pace, parting company
outside the library with a quick, almost furtive, peck on the cheek.  I had
a dull day of study ahead of me, finishing up a paper that was due and
planned to spend most of the day in the library in an effort to get it done
on time.  Alex, on the other hand had a day of boring administration ahead
of him as he dropped out of some classes and gave thought to what ones he
was going to take instead, and when.  We weren't going to meet for lunch;
just head back to the apartment when we were both done.  I knew I wouldn't
be finished before evening, and I had a feeling Alex might go down to the
gym or the pool and work off his frustrations again.

As it turned out, I got home after he did and found him sprawled on the
couch, his head resting on a cushion on one arm and feet up on the other
arm.  'Il Trovatore' was playing and he had the libretto in one hand, the
other behind his head.  His T-shirt had pulled up showing an inch of boxer
shorts and a further two of belly above the waistband of his jeans.  He
looked perfectly relaxed, his shoes on the floor, his jacket hung on the
back of a chair, his backpack leaning on one of the legs of the dining
table and a can of coke on the coffee table within easy reach.  It almost
seemed a shame to disturb him, but he reached for the remote as I came into
the room.

"No, leave it on."  I said as I crossed the living room.  "Chi del gitano,
i giorni abbella!"  I sang along with the gypsy men as I pointedly gathered
up his jacket to hang up with my own, prompting a bark of laughter from my
ever-supportive boyfriend.  "La Zingarella!  La Zingare-e-lla!!"  I left
the room, making an obscene gesture at him as I did so.

"Screw you, Thomson!"  He called to my back.

"Promises, promises!"

I tidied up the clothing strewn around our bedroom, humming along to the
music as I did.  He had gone to the gym, so I stuffed his discarded workout
clothes in the hamper and straightened up the bathroom a little before I
went to rejoin him.  I leaned over the back of the couch and kissed the top
of his head, savoring the smell of his recently washed hair.  He tilted his
head back and let me kiss his lips, which I did, then tousled his hair
before coming round to take a seat.

"So, did you get your classes organized?"

"Yup.  Mostly.  Dropped the most tragic ones, and got some info about night
classes."  I tickled the sole of his feet through the white socks to get
him to move and let me sit down, interrupting him in mid flow, and he took
a second to recover his flow.  "Sorry.  Um, yeah, I'm thinking about taking
a Spanish night class, and the music appreciation one looks cool."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, it's like credits for listening to music."

"There may be a bit more to it than that!"

"Ha ha."  He was not amused.  "I know that.  So I figure with the Spanish I
already know, 'Beginner's Spanish' can't be too tough.  Then I only need to
take one extra class next semester, and assuming I pass everything I should
be okay."

"That's great!"  I was really pleased that the disaster seemed to have been
averted.

"Yup, so I just have to hope it impresses the trustees."

"I guess so."  I squeezed his knee, to show I was on his side.

"So your sister phoned while you were out."

"Yeah?"  I was losing my enthusiasm about this visit, I mean I really love
my sister, but she can be hard work.

"She'll be here around seven tomorrow."

"Okay."  I sighed, just as well I'd finished my paper, as Fridays were
pretty busy days for me lately.  "I should be able to meet her then.
You'll be at practice, right?"

"Yeah."  There was a long pause.  "So you didn't tell her about me?"  His
voice was very flat, impossible to gauge what he was thinking.

"Sure I did."  Didn't I?  I must have.  We didn't talk often, but I surely
must have mentioned Alex at some point to her.

"No.  You told her you split up with John, but not about you and me."

"It wasn't deliberate, I was sure I had.  You know I don't speak to Megan
that often, and we were only roomies to start.  I guess by the time I spoke
to her again we'd been together for a while, and, well, it just can't have
come up."  I shrugged, and offered him a weak smile.

"I guess."

"Don't be mad, Alex.  Please."

"Why shouldn't I be?"

"Because you know how much I care about you, about how proud and lucky I am
to have you as my boyfriend.  It was an oversight."  I waited for a
response, but he just continued to look straight at me, his expression
blank and unreadable.

"You're too cute."  He finally laughed, a grin spreading across his face
and he yanked me into a rough hug, mussing my hair as he did so.

"So you're not mad?"

"That'd be kinda hypocritical, wouldn't it?  I haven't told any of my
family."  He continued to grin like an idiot, and I scowled back at him.

"So you deliberately made me feel bad, what, as a joke?"  I sat up and
glared at him.

"Jeez, Ryan, I'm sorry, I was just fooling around."  He looked crestfallen.

"You're too easy, Hayes!"  I grinned broadly at him, two could play at that
game.

"I deserved that."  He laughed, realizing that I had been joking too.

"Yes.  You did.  But really, I'm sorry I never said anything to Megan, we
just don't talk all that often."  I shrugged, but his grin stayed in place,
accompanied by a rueful shake of his head.

"Don't worry about it, Ry, I spoke to her for a while on the phone.  She
seems nice, but she's from the same stock as you, so that's not
surprising."

"You old smoothie."  I snorted, and was rewarded with another tight hug and
being shaken from side to side while he made growling noises against my
neck.  "Down boy!"  I laughed, pushing him away and getting to my feet.
"Are you hungry?"

"Only for you!"

"So I'll just make something for myself?"  I turned to go to the kitchen,
but was grabbed around the waist and yanked back into a sitting position,
practically on his knee.  "Hey!  You break it, you bought it."

"Okay, I think I've got a nickel."

"You utter bastard."  I hit him on the shoulder.  "I'm worth at least a
dime."

"Get in that kitchen, boy, you just priced yourself out of the market."  He
pushed me to my feet again and slapped my butt playfully.  I sighed
theatrically, and if not for the fact the man could burn a boiled egg, I'd
have told him to make his own damned dinner.  Alex was not destined by
nature to be single; he'd die of starvation if he were left to fend for
himself.  Assuming he didn't drown in oceans of unwashed clothes first.  I
went through to the kitchen and opened the door of the fridge, standing in
front of it, staring in.  Nothing in there appealed to me.  So I rummaged
in our slightly chaotic freezer and finally decided just to nuke some
Bolognese sauce we had left over.  That way, dinner would be ready in
twenty minutes, I'd had a long day, so that sounded like a good thing to
me.

"Whatcha making?"  A quiet voice asked from the door as, puppy-like, the
smell enticed him into the kitchen.

"Thought you weren't hungry."  I decided to tease him a little more.

"It smells good."

"Is that an apology for the nickel thing, Billy?"  I asked with a grin as I
added a little olive oil to a pan of water.

"Will you feed me if it is?"

"Yeah."

"Then it's an apology."  He sounded humble enough, so I decided to stop
teasing him.

"Good, see, that wasn't so hard, was it?"

"Yeah, you gotta be worth a quarter."  He put his hands on my waist and
kissed my left earlobe.  "But to me, you're priceless."

"Okay, handsome, you get to eat.  We're having last week's left over
Bolognese sauce with penne pasta.  That okay for you?"

"Everything you make is always delicious, sexy one."  He murmured huskily
in my ear, his hands had never left my waist, and I was tingling all over
from the lightness of his touch.

"You always say the right thing, don't you?  You charmer."  I turned in his
arms, letting the pasta boil unsupervised, and kissed him full on the lips
preventing him from speaking.  But he managed to answer anyway, just not
with words.  Eventually, though, the angry hiss of water splashing over and
boiling instantly made me turn back to the cooking.  "Make yourself useful,
get some plates, will you?"

"Yes, sir!"  He released me, gave me a mock salute and a dopey grin and
spun on one foot to do as instructed.  I watched his back as he reached up
to get the plates, and admired his grace for the billionth time with a
sigh.  We had an enjoyable dinner; I sometimes think that Bolognese sauce
tastes better after being reheated, cooked through for a second time.
Maybe I'm just weird, maybe it was that we fooled around and fed one
another and giggled like idiots throughout the meal.

"That was good."  I sighed, stretching full length on the couch and
wriggling my toes contentedly.  Alex had washed the plates and come back to
sit on the floor beside me, his back to me, one of my arms draped around
his neck, him kissing my fingers and tracing the lines of my palm with
gentle, feather strokes.  My other hand played gently with his hair, it was
wonderfully soft and clean and silky smooth and felt great.  We stayed like
that watching TV for a while, just enjoying one another's closeness.
Eventually, Alex cleared his throat and gave my hand a little squeeze,
bringing me out of a half doze.

"Can I ask you a question?"  He asked hesitantly, not looking round at me,
just continuing to examine my hand.

"Shoot."

"Earlier, did you mean what you said?"

"Which thing in particular?"  I asked lazily, wondering where we were going
with this line of discussion.  He needed a haircut, but I quite liked it
this length, made it more fun to twist around my fingers.

"Nothing.  It's dumb."

"Why do you do that?  Why do you keep starting to ask questions and then
stopping?  What are you afraid I'm going to do?"

"Nothing, it's just, I don't know."  He sighed heavily; unable to find the
words he wanted.

"Spit it out, Hayes."

"Earlier, when I said 'screw you', you know?"  He trailed off, and hung his
head; I could see the color rising in his neck and face.  Always
uncomfortable with the discussion of sex, we had steered clear of the topic
of actual penetration as it made him squirm even more than usual, which was
saying something!

"Is that all?"  I laughed.  "You can be a silly creature at times, can't
you?"  I pulled gently on his hair, until he tipped his head back and
looked up at me, he was passive enough for me to able to nod his head up
and down for him and.  I spoke from the corner of my mouth, like a bad
ventriloquist.  "Yes, I can, Ryan."

"Goof."  He flapped at my hand to make me let go.

"So what do you want to know?"

"You'd, um, you'd do that?"  He was having trouble looking me in the eye.

"Only with someone I really loved and trusted."  I replied carefully.

"You've done it before?"

"Yes."

"Which way?  I mean, you know, um giving or um..." He trailed off
completely, his hesitancy was amusing me, as this was a subject I was
perfectly happy to discuss with him.  Anal sex wasn't something I
absolutely required in a relationship, but it was something I had done and
found to be enjoyable.

"Top or Bottom?"  I supplied.

"Yeah."  He looked up at me, chewing his lower lip nervously.

"Both."

"And you liked it?"

"It can be a very enjoyable, very intimate thing."

"Does it hurt?"

"It can.  I never found it did, but I know people who have found it really
painful.  You have to take it slow and easy the first time, but if it's
done right it can be amazing."

"Okay.  So, um, which do you prefer?"

"As it happens, I prefer being a bottom."

"Really?"  He sounded surprised.

"Really."  I decided it was time to stop talking around the matter and use
plain language. "I like being fucked.  Does that surprise you?"

"I guess.  A little.  I mean, um, you're a pretty, well, manly guy."

"Does that make me less manly?"  I asked, amused by both the tone of his
voice, and the implications of what he was saying.

"No.  I guess not."  He shrugged.

"So is that all you wanted to ask?"

"Um.  Yeah, I think so.  Yeah, for now."

"Okay."  I smiled fondly at him as he continued to gnaw on his lower lip.
"Any time you want to discuss this, you know, just say.  That would be a
huge step, and you know, it has to be something you're comfortable with.
I'll never try to get you to do anything you don't want to do."

"I know that, Ryan.  Thanks, I appreciate it."  He smiled a small, hesitant
smile at me which, when I smiled back, spread into his usual broad, radiant
grin.  "Let's drop it for now, 'kay?"

"Sure, any time.  Hey, how about some hot chocolate?"

"Sounds good.  Then I'm gonna take you to bed and show you just how much I
appreciate this."  With a grunt he pushed himself to his feet, grabbed my
hand and yanked me upright too.  I staggered a little, tripped over my own
feet and lost my balance, falling against him.  Lucky for me he was so
solid or we'd both have ended up on the floor.  Actually, that might not
have been so bad!  We went through to the bedroom and I allowed him to
undress me before pushing me backwards onto the bed and stripping himself.
He joined me on the bed and did an outstanding job of showing his
appreciation, insisting that I should just lie back and let him do all the
work.  I was hardly going to protest, but I felt slightly guilty he was
getting all the pleasure and I was getting none.  Every time I reached for
him, though, he would swat my hand away and whisper that tonight was all
about me.  We fell asleep in one another's arms, a warm contented tangle of
limbs.