Date: Sun, 11 May 2014 10:58:48 -0700 (PDT)
From: "e_bacrot@yahoo.com" <e_bacrot@yahoo.com>
Subject: Freshman Justin Part 2

Thanks to all the nice comments.  It inspired me to continue writing what
happened.  Each line I type I have to remember a bit and fill in the blanks
from almost 15 years ago, so bear with me.  Anyway, back to the story....

   So where we left off, Justin was still sleeping in the morning and I was
looking at him while he slept.  I almost felt guilty about what we did
because I hoped he didn't end up falling in love with me.  I was as close
to in love with him as I could be without loving him, but I think he would
be thinking differently.  My issue was I did still like women, I loved
being with guys, but I never wanted a serious relationship with a guy.  I
mean I have no problem keeping my thing with Justin going, and I cared for
him, but I could never openly date him. I didn't want to go any further
together until he understood what was going on between us. He might be gay
and looking for a boyfriend, I was bi and looking for a fuck friend, so I
had to figure that out.  I didn't want to hurt him, and the earlier we get
that settled the better.  I would love to be his bro and have benefits on
the side, but I couldn't walk to class with him holding hands.  He started
to wake up late morning, I had already showered and brought food back from
the cafe for both of us.

Justin: Hey, you got up early.

Me: Yea, I'm an early riser, I brought you some food from the cafe.

Justin: Cool, you wanna play madden?

Me: Sure, you stink though take a shower haha

   He just gave me a dirty look and started taking his clothes off.
Another big step for him, he wasn't afraid to be naked around me.  I told
him we need to have a talk after his shower about a few things, by the way
he looked at me he seemed to know what I was going to talk about.  He came
back from his shower and started getting dressed and I said:

Me: Last night was awesome, but you know we can't be a couple right?

Justin: Yea...I know

Me: I don't mean to be so blunt about it, but we need to set a few rules.

Justin: Do you even love your girlfriend?

Me: Wow, where did that come from?

Justin: I really like you Brandon, not just last night, but
everything....hanging out, playing games, I think you are gonna ditch me
once your girlfriend comes tomorrow.

   Now I was the one without words, I never expected him to understand the
situation better than me.  I started thinking about his words....no I
didn't love my girlfriend, she just gave me sex, and Justin gave me more
than she ever did.  I mean that in all senses of the word.  We were buds,
hung out, played games together, drank together...and after last night had
sex together.  He started giving me a scrunched face while this was running
through my head, it actually was almost a minute before I responded...but
he did first.

Justin: I'm not a kid Brandon, I know you are older than me, but you don't
need to treat me like one and think about what you are going to say before
you speak because you are afraid of hurting my feelings.

Me: I wasn't thinking about that at all Justin.  I was figuring things out,
thats all.  You want a serious talk? Ok we will have one.

Justin: You don't love her at all do you?  You just use her for sex, like
me.

Me: No, No dude, wow, umm you are half right.  I do use her for sex and she
is insane, but I didn't use you....I am rethinking everything right now.

Justin: Well I don't want the fucking food you brought back, I'm going to
breakfast alone, you better fucking figure it out when I come back, because
if you don't I'll never be back.

   He left and slammed the door.  I was crushed inside, I let down my buddy
and had no idea what to think.  I had to make a decision, I mean I wanted
to get married and have kids (which I did) but at this point in my life I
still wanted to experiment with guys.  I still to this day will acknowledge
a cute guy and drool.  But this was college.  I decided.  Justin came back
with food, and had a stern look on his face.  I stood up and gave him a big
hug and kiss on the cheek.

Me: You were right, we can be together, but we need to keep it under the
radar.

Justin: Thats it? I'm the whore on the side?

Me: I called Michelle (my GF) and told her I found someone else, I'm not
helping her move in tomorrow and we have the whole day together.

Justin: So now what?

Me: We just need to be careful about us, its the best for me and you Jus.

Justin:....yea, you're right.  I'm not pissed anymore, I can't believe you
dumped Michelle for...this or me or whatever it is.

Me: For you man, you have been cool to hang with this last week, and ya
know, the bonus round :).

   He laughed and we hugged.  He ate his food, but I was still thinking in
my head.  It was still spinning as usual.  I think I was starting to fall
in love with him, but it went against everything I had planned.  We had
been together a week, and man still those glasses and his face.  Just cute
as shit, I can't explain it.  But I had to remember he wasn't a kid, he was
smart and I couldn't treat him like a kid even though I was older. So I
took the kid gloves off as he finished eating, I asked.

Me: So what do you want from this Jus?

Justin: You, I want to be with you as much as I can.  I don't care if it is
sex or playing games or whatever, (he started crying) its just so fucking
nice to have someone in my life that wants to hang out with me...

   I hugged him and sat on the bed and he fell in my lap.  I was feeling so
shitty I let him down before.  He was a great kid, and I hated that I had
something to do with making him feel bad.  I had to make a move.  Something
that went against everything that made me feel comfortable where I was.  I
was going to...well,

Me: Ok, how about we talk to Ben about switching rooms?

Justin: Wha...what do you mean?

Me: He can take my single and you and I can move in together across the
hall.  It will give him his privacy getting pussy, and we can do our thing
together in a bigger space...

Justin: You are serious?

Me: Yep, fuck it, I'd rather be with you than be alone in this room, plus
my thing with Michelle is gone and I'm sure she will be bad mouthing me
around campus.

Justin: You don't always have to justify a decision Brandon, I want this,
but don't make it like you have no other alternative.

Me: You're right, I'm sorry.  I do want to room with you seriously, nothing
else involved.

Justin: Ok.

   I had called Michelle and told her I found someone else, she wasn't even
pissed, so I started to dig a little bit and it happened that she was
banging a 28 year old art teacher during the summer.  So that was it.  This
younger, smaller naive kid was giving me the business.  And I don't blame
him.  I deserved it.  I was looking for a suck/fuck buddy, but found a kid
that wanted affection and wanted to be loved.  I talked to Ben and he was
all for it.  I talked to housing and said I could be like a mentor to
Justin and we got really along good.  They agreed and we swapped rooms.  It
was me and Justin in the double room, and Ben moved across the hall to my
old single.  Ben asked me what the fuck are you thinking giving up a
single?  I just said that it made sense, you need privacy, and I dont....my
GF (who I broke up with, but he didnt know) lived in a single, so if I
needed to be alone I would stay with her.  It would give him plenty of
privacy for whatever.  He said, "Yea good point, I kinda thought Justin was
a little queer anyway."  I wanted to hit him, but I didn't, I just smiled
and went back into my new room....unfortunatly Justin did hear what Ben
said.

Justin: He called me a queer Brandon....

Me: Calm down Jus, you need to choose your battles dude.  Ben isn't a bad
kid, just a little...what do you call it?

Justin: Queer?

Me: Hahah, that works.

   We both smiled and finished the move.  We changed the room style so it
was open, we had beds on both sides of the room now. We just started
talking and drinking a little.  Thankfully I was free from helping Michelle
move in, so we had another day together.  As the whiskey kept flowing and
it was late afternoon, he started opening up a little more. He told me he
never even smoked weed before, and I had thought he smoked weed by the
posters, but he never did. I had a little stash I got from my older brother
before I came back to school.  I don't smoke it all the time, but every now
and then, why not.  He just assumed the role of a stoner in highschool so
he could connect with other people. The only thing that made me feel bad
for him was that each time he told me something he was ashamed of, he
thought it would make me hate him.

Me: Jus, this isn't highschool anymore, you don't need to pretend or make
up a fake cover story.  I don't care about any of that. You did what you
had to in highschool to survive, its over.  If you want to talk about it I
will listen.

Justin: I know, its just tough being me after pretending to be someone for
a long time.

Me: Well at least we can stay up late again and just chill if you want, my
first class isn't until 11am and you don't have a class until 10.

Justin: Its so weird, you go to school 8 hours a day for 4 years, then you
go to college and you only have class for 3 hours a day.

Me: Biggest problem is you have no mom to wake you up and yell at
you....you have to motivate yourself to go to class.

Justin: Did you have problems with that?

Me: At first yea, but I didn't have a buddy to wake me up and push me, I'll
make sure your ass is up and ready for class.

   Justin came over and hugged me.  I told him we needed to get dinner
before we drank anymore.  I was gonna see if he wanted to smoke a little
weed later too, just to get him exposed to more things.  He had pretended
to be a stoner for a long time, I wanted to see if he really wanted to try
it.  Let me just say, he had come a mile from where he was when he first
arrived.  He was still a little worried about some things, I could tell,
but we were sharing a room together now and he felt safe.  We went to
dinner and came back around 6pm.  He wanted to play madden, so we did, god
his facial expressions were so cute when he made a good play.  Still to
this day, we are still friends, his face is still so unique and
amazing...and the glasses, damn.

We played for a bit, and then he put the controller down and looked over at
me.

Justin: I'm tired of playing, lets do something else.

   He grabbed my dick through my jeans and started rubbing my chest under
my shirt.  I told him put some music on so Ben doesn't hear us across the
hall.  He did.  It was top 10 stuff from the era, like Creed or Matchbox 20
stuff, I don't remember the exact songs (except one which I will talk about
later - its important in the story).  Napster was in its high time, and we
just downloaded whatever.  He tried to take my clothes off with his teeth
and failed miserably haha.  I think he did it more as a joke and we both
laughed and stipped to our boxers. He was so small to my frame (I was 6
inches taller and good build), but so beautiful with his short hair,
glasses, and that amazing face....just amazing.  I was half hard, he was
tenting like no one's business.  I guess he had been horny for awhile and
was just playing madden with me to wait until I wanted to fool around.  We
kissed a little bit and felt each other up, then he had an idea.

Justin: I want to drink some more whiskey and pour it into your mouth with
mine.

Me: You better not drink any, I want the whole shot in my mouth :)

   So we played around doing weird stuff, probably because of the booze,
and he was finally feeling free from his former life.  I know he liked the
sex, but he also liked that he finally had someone he could just go nuts
with and knew he wouldn't be judged.  It was fun, whatever weird stuff he
wanted to try out, it was fine with me.  Two guys in underwear with hardons
playing around...it was amazing.  I took his dick out and dipped it in the
whiskey and for about 5 mins, thats how I got my next drink.  He was
between laughing and almost cumming the entire time.  I stood up and asked
him if he wanted to smoke a litte weed.

Justin: You have weed?

Me: Yea I lied before, I smoke on occasion, my older brother got me some to
bring back to school.

Justin: I'm not sure, I don't want to end up looking stupid or anything...

   I reminded him I just took shots of whiskey off his dick and balls, and
he laughed.  He was still worried he would do something that would make me
hate him, I had to reassure him again.

Me: Justin, you aren't gonna do anything to make me not like you.  Stop
thinking like that dude.

Justin: I know in my head, but sometimes I don't know and I feel like if
you really know me, you'll just find someone else to hang with.

Me: We live together now, housing won't let me move again unless you die
basically, so we are stuck together now whether you like it or not.

Justin: I want to smoke with you.

Me: I'm not forcing you Jus, I just want you to see what its like.

   Forceful Justin came back into light, and he told me to fill the pipe.
He went over and put the box fan in the window and he was ready.  He got
like that sometimes.  So submissive and naive sometimes, and then when he
made up his mind about something, that was it.  I had to teach him how to
smoke out of the pipe, how to hold his fingers and told him the other ways
we could smoke weed.  We smoked back and forth for a bit, we even kissed a
little bit trying to shotgun the smoke back and forth.  He was really
stoned, as I was.  But I was used to it, and he wasn't.  He got super horny
and started clawing at my boxer briefs.  I told him hold on, lets go to my
bunk, get naked...it was time to 69.  He tasted amazing again, I was going
slow on his slim almost 6 incher, but he was going to town on my cock.  He
kept trying to deep throat it and fail each time.  I told him it didn't
matter and to use his mouth on the back of my tip like I was doing to him.
I would like to say we both came at the same time, but we didn't.  He came
in my mouth and passed out haha.  Booze and first time smoking weed did him
in.  It was still only 6pm and I knew he would be up in a few hours.
Needless to say, I had a huge case of blue balls that needed to be fixed
later.

   I played a little nhl 99, played like shit because I was high, and then
went back to the bed he was on and just watched him sleep.  I loved to
watch him sleep, his whole world had just been changed in one week and I
was glad I was the reason.  He always had a little smile when he slept, it
might be because I swallowed his load before he passed out, but who knows.
This young kid who was attractive and amazing to hang with was treated like
shit for 4 years in highschool.  I was so glad I found him.  He woke up
about 2 hours later, and I was laying out clothes for tomorrow.  He looked
like a wreck haha.

Justin: wow, I feel like shit man...

Me: you look like shit too, booze and weed combination are for the
experienced.

Justin: I'm gonna take a shower, you want to join me?

Me: The whole suite is back dude, and I just took one.

Justin: I know, I just wanted to see how daring you would be.

   He smiled, I smiled back and he grabbed his shower gear and headed out
of the room.  This little shit, I think I created a monster with him.  I
heard a loud bang outside the room and went into the hallway. One of the
other suitemates Brett had knocked Justin's shower gear out of his hand and
was laughing.  He looked at me like he wanted to fight me.  Brett was
bigger than me, height and weight, but he was 18 and probably was never in
a fight in his life.  I told Justin to go shower and I will talk to Brett.

Me: How is that funny Brett?

Brett: Because people laughed at it.

   New approach now.  I can see he was clearly a bully in highschool and
wanted to carry that legacy on to college. Not just this experience, but
other dealings too.

Me: I'm gonna wait outside your room, and each morning for the next week
knock your shower bag out of your hand on the way to the shower, I have the
fucking time dude.

Brett: Come on man, it was a joke.

Me: And so will what I do, people will laugh when they see what I do to
you, except I'll have the entire hockey team here to witness it and take
pictures.  Sounds fair?  As long as people laugh its a joke right?

Brett: Fine, I'm sorry.

Me: Tell Justin you are sorry, not me.  He is my roomate now, you fuck with
him, you fuck with me.  And if he comes back and tells me its some half
assed attempt at saying you are sorry, you will be sorry bitch!

   I turned around and went back to my room glad I didn't need to throw
punches.  I don't like to fight, I was a goaltender in hockey my entire
life so I never did fight in game.  I also just never liked the whole
fighting thing when words can solve the issue easier and send a clearer
message.  Don't get me wrong, my body was built for fighting, but my mind
was not.  Justin didn't go in the shower, he was standing behind the door
in the bathroom I found out later.  He heard everything Brett and I said
between each other.  After he came back from showering he hugged me and
french kissed me.  I mean really deep long french kiss.  He just said
thanks, and told me Brett said he was legit sorry, we never talked about
his thing with Brett again to this day, and he never had another problem
with him.

   So now its about 8pm or so, Justin is getting his shit together for
class tomorrow and I am doing the same thing.  He never got dressed from
his shower and comes over to me and starts biting my ear.  I laughed a
little bit and asked him what he was doing.

Justin: Lets drink some more and fuck around.

Me: You really want to fuck around?

Justin: We just did before the shower Brandon, right?

Me: I mean the word fuck.

Justin: We can try it, I, I'm not sure though, your dick is pretty big.

Me: I'm not gonna hurt you dude, if you want to stop, just say it.

   He was scared.  I don't blame him actually, although I wasn't hung like
a horse, I was big enough to cause some pain. This was the only time I
considered in my life to let someone fuck me.  His dick was skinny and not
too big, but after I suggested it to Justin, he said no.  He never told me
why.  He wanted me to fuck him.  I told him we could make out and I would
finger him awhile to make it easier when we fuck.  He started drinking more
and more, almost like it seemed he was trying to kill the pain with alcohol
when we started.  It did not feel sexual and my dick was not responding
from what I was seeing.

Me: Justin, I can tell you are scared, we don't have to have sex tonight
man.

Justin: (Drunk) I owe you from protecting me tonight.

Me: Dude, we aren't in prison, and you are not my bitch....I would love to
fuck you, believe me, but not like this, go to bed.

Justin: I love the world, I love polar bears, I love college!

   He was shitfaced, I kissed him goodnight.  He tried to grab me into his
bed but he was too weak.  He was my smart little sexy glasses wearing
roomate now.