Date: Tue, 16 Sep 2008 18:24:51 +0000
From: Steve Thomas <stevethomas535@hotmail.com>
Subject: Growing up Joshua, Ch. 11

This is a work of pure fiction, but based on the author's feelings,
beliefs, and in some cases, experience.�� Come to think of it -- it might
not be all that pure! There may be graphic sexual encounters at times
between males, so if this offends you, you are invited to retreat.�� If you
are too young or it is otherwise illegal for you to be reading this kind if
story, shame on you for reading it - - please stop here.�� If not, - -
ENJOY!  �� Joshua Alan Black II

Barbie Warfield -- my mother

Dennis Warfield -- my stepfather

Wilma Warfield -- Dennis's mother ("Missy" to me)

Francis Warfield -- Dennis's father -- ("Sir" to me.)

Alva Benson -- my Gram (Grandma)

Iver Benson -- my Pop (Grandpa)

Richard -- My favorite Cousin

Ray and Raul -- Richards' older brothers.

Nate Willows -- My first roomie.

Rudy Chanbers -- Friend across the hall.

Randy "Rascal" Ringstrom.  Tutor

Wayne "Bulge" Andrews -- Rudy's room mate

Roger Schwimmer -- a football player.

James Meriwether -- Mid-year Transfer

Jakub Ivanov -- college friend



>From Chapter 10:

"Well, anyway -- dinner's ready." Said the General

"I'll be right there.  Is James here?"  I asked.

"Yes -- he'll be at the table too.  You're going to Yock's this weekend
again, right?  I'd like you to be here for Thanksgiving next weekend.  You
brother will be home, you know -- and Cary."

"I'll be here.  I won't be going to Yock's this weekend."  I said, sadly.
"Or ever."

"Oh -- you broke up?  Sorry, Son.  He seemed like a nice kid.  I know you
really liked him."

Or - Loved him


Chapter 11

I poured myself into my studies and our presentation the next Wednesday was
spectacular.  James asked me that first night if I wanted to play -- since
I was no longer with Yock.  I said no at first, but I came over to his bed
on Sunday night and he was more than willing to help me with some -- let's
call it "therapy".  We repeated therapy every night before going to sleep.
Somehow neither of us could get attached to the other.

Wednesday night came and I was disappointed that my brother and his Cary
didn't show up as expected.  I felt like crying myself to sleep, but I
again took some solace in more "therapy" with James.

Thanksgiving morning, the house already smelled of the turkey roasting.  We
were just getting ready to sit down to breakfast when Nate walked in the
door -- looking altogether dashing in his cadet uniform.  When he saw me,
he tossed his cap on the table and ran to me.  I thought he would try to
swoop me up in his arms, but instead he jumped into mine, wrapping his legs
around me.  I felt a little embarrassed, but everyone else laughed, so I
hugged him close.  I wanted so much to kiss him!  I craned my neck around
him.  "Where's Cary?"

Nate got really quiet.  He was still sitting in my arms.  His look told me.
"Aww -- you broke up?"  I said.

He nodded and his eyes were wet.  Then he said, "It's okay -- I'm home!"
then he whispered to me -- "Good thing nobody asked -- cuz we shore didn't
TELL!"  Then he kissed my cheek.  I went to kiss his and he turned his face
quickly and it landed on his lips.  Everyone laughed again.

He then ran to his mom and hugged her.  I envied him.  Then he hugged his
dad.  They both looked so uncomfortable, I wondered if that had ever
happened before.  "I really missed all of you!  Even you, James!"  James
grinned back at him.  I wondered if they had ever had any "therapy"
together.

Nate took his suitcase into my room.  "I moved James in there, honey --
thinking that Cary would be with you."  Said his mother.

"Well James'll just have to move out.  I have too much catching up to do
with my brother!"  He grinned at me.  My tummy quivered, and of course so
did something somewhere south of that.

"Nathan."  Said the General.  "I want you to be in the other room."  He
wasn't smiling, but rather was drilling Nathan.  I knew exactly why he said
it -- and so did Nate.  My father was trying to protect me.  I'm not sure
he knew what James and I were doing, but I knew he was right about me and
Nate.  I hated it ... but I knew he was doing what he thought was right.

Thanksgiving dinner was much happier than I thought because I sat next to
my brother and though both of us had just lost our boyfriends, we had each
other again -- at least in this way.  James knew how much I loved my
brother, and he was nice to both of us.

It was very early in the morning when I felt a tugging on my shoulder.  It
was James.  I didn't feel like fooling around just then, and I told him I
was too tired.

"I think you should go to your brother's room.  I think he needs you."

"Huh?"

"I was going to the bathroom and heard him in his room.  I think he was
crying."

I was up in an instant.  I ran -- as fast and as quietly as I could to
Nate's room as I could.  He was fast asleep.  I started back to my room.
"Huh?"  He said.  "Who is it?"

I turned and went back.  It was dark in the room.  I bent low and
whispered, "It's me."

"I'd know that whisper anywhere!  Get in here, you!"  He opened the covers
and pulled me down into a wet brotherly kiss.  Well okay maybe most
brothers don't kiss quite like that!

"Nate -- I love you so much!"

"Joshy, I - "

"No -- let me finish.  I know we can never be real partners, but ... can
you tell me that you don't love me more than anyone else in the word?"

He didn't speak for a long time, but only held me close.  Finally he said
-- "No.  Joshy.  Every time I was with Cary I was thinking about you.  I'm
gonna have to get over that!"

"NOOooo! Don't get over it, Nate!  If you feel that way, we belong
together!"

"Joshy -- don't get excited.  If you do -- I'm gonna have to tell you to
leave.  You know what can happen.  Last time this happened, I didn't see
you -- until today!"

"I know when that's coming on -- and it isn't now."

"Okay, but -- you just have to know that I can't ever do what you're
asking.  Just let me hold you -- for now -- please?  I know you want more
-- and -- God help me -- so do I -- but please don't ask me to -- be your -
"

"Lover?"

"Please -- just hold me.  It's late.  Maybe we can talk about this -- later
-- tomorrow or before I have to back -- sometime."

I relaxed in his arms.  It felt so good to be once again -- in the arms of
the guy that I love with all my heart.  We fell asleep.



"Pop -- we didn't do anything."  Said Nate, when the General woke us up --
still spooned like we fell asleep."

After a long pause, the General said, "I know you didn't."

"How -- how do you know?"  Said

"Because you just told me.  I know neither of you will betray my trust."

It was understood that we were on the same honor code that we'd had at the
academy and that also that Nate had at the Point.

"After last night's feast, I've declared a furlough for you mother.  When
you feel like getting up, it's every man for himself for breakfast."  Said
the General.

"Thanks Pop.  Is James up yet?" Asked Nate

"He's up and gone.  He has to work this morning.  Not everyone has it off.
If I am not mistaken -- you do too, don't you, Boy?"

"I do, but not until this afternoon."  I answered.

"Take it easy, boys.  You deserve it."

"Thanks Pop.

"Thanks Dad."

Dad left and shut and locked the door behind him.

When he left, Nate told me, "You know that was his way of telling us it's
okay to bunk together."

I snuggled back into him again.  He hugged my chest and we fell asleep
again for some time.

When I woke up again, Nate was not in bed with me, but it was him opening
the door that woke me.

"Up and at `em, Bro!"  He said.  "Chow's almost on."  Then he disappeared.

I went and took care of my morning pee-boner and wandered out to the living
room in my jam bottoms and was surprised that both Dad and Mom were there,
reading.  " `Morning, sleepy head." Said my step-mom.

"I think someone gave me a sleeping pill!"  I said, stretching ... and glad
I took the time to pee first.

"Yes, turkey can do that."  She said.  "Smells like your brother has a nice
breakfast for you out there."  I went to the kitchen -- just out of sight
of our parents and he welcomed me with a warm hug and a deep, passionate
kiss.  The front of my jams started to rise, so I sat down quickly -- in
case anyone else came to the kitchen.

Nate had fried up some potatoes, and also some bacon and eggs, and put
toast down as soon as I entered the kitchen.  When he came to the table
everything was ready.  I felt starved!  Between us we ate 9 eggs, six
slices of toast, at least a quart of O.J apiece and a mountain of potatoes.

"YOU've been working out, little brother!  And it looks good on you!"  Said
my brother, who easily looked as good as I did, but definitely much
thinner.  And of course I wasn't really smaller.  He was slightly shorter
and much lighter weight than I.

I beamed of course, and replied, "Well, you look awfully good to me too.
But then -- you always did."

He looked like he wanted to eat me up, then said, "I definitely wish that
you were not my little brother."

"Me too.  Some people have hang-ups about that kind of thing."  I said.

Nate looked toward the living room and rolled his eyes.  "You wanna take a
walk after breakfast?"

"Sure."

Seth told me that it was good to talk about things -- with my brother -- or
with anyone that I like.  He's a reality therapist, and he says that
sometimes we get fantasy and reality mixed up in our heads.  That's
probably what made my subconscious rebel.  By talking, it is supposed to
make the reality clearer.  It hurts me to have my brother remind me that he
can never be mine in a serious way -- but I don't want to waste any more of
my time like I have been over the last six months.

Seth says I learned to escape into my fantasies when Dennis would do me.
Well, as simple as that sounds, it took Seth to tell me and help me
understand.  He told me that I have been forced to grow up too fast; that I
still am a 15-year-old inside, and that because my mother pretty much
ignored my problem, Dennis took advantage of me and that his parents
treated me badly, I was driven to excel in other ways -- meaning my school
work, of course.  Which all brought me to the "perfect storm" I was living
at the time.

Nate drove us down to the lake.  We walked ... and talked.

After a long silence, I started, "Nate -- I love you more than anything or
anyone I can think of."

"I feel the same, bro."

"Then why - "

"Joshy, lots of brothers are close. Even some straight brothers have some
fun with each other.  As long as both of them are clean -- then I can't see
it as any more than good clean fun.  That's what I wish it was with you.
But you want more from me than I can give you."

"You mean more than you're willing to give me."  I pouted.

"Did you like holding me last night?"

"You know I did."  I said.

"I know you're bigger than I am, but you're still my little brother.  And
there's also the honor code in our house."

"Yeah.  I know."  I pouted some more.

"Can you tell me about this Jakub guy that you met?"

"He's -- um -- what do you want to know?"

"I dunno -- like -- what's he look like?"

"Um -- well -- he's blond, blue eyes, small.  Very small."

"You mean his - - ?"

"I meant that he is he's only 6'-6" tall and weighs about 135 pounds."

"Wow!"

"But -- his you-know-what is small too."

"Yeah, that's not surprising.  Of course compared to you ... anyone is
small!  Yours is so huge -- even considering that you are a pretty big guy.
Mine's not small, but in comparison - - there IS no comparison."

"He's uncut too."

"You liked that?"  He asked as we walked down into an underpass.

"Don't you?"  I asked.

"You're the only guy I ever -- you know -- and yeah!  I love the smell and
taste."

We were in the middle of the underpass.  It was dark in it, so I stopped
and pulled Nate in to a kiss.  He's always very vulnerable to kisses.  Well
duh!  So am I!  He kissed me back passionately.

"You make it very hard sometimes, Joshy."  I grinned.  "You know what I
mean.  But let's not misunderstand -- I'm not gonna change my mind on this.
If you don't think that you can keep that straight -- we probably shouldn't
be doing anything.  But to tell you the truth -- I love playing with you.
But if that makes you -- um -- uncomfortable - "

"Uncomfortable?"  I said.  I was glad it was dark and he could not see the
tears in my eyes.  "I wouldn't call what I feel `uncomfortable'.
Definitely horny -- and more, but -- I think I am able to handle the `more'
stuff now.  Um -- when you -- and I -- find other guys -- can we still
reserve some -- um -- special privileges -- with each other?"

"I think we should wait until that happens.  We shouldn't be making any
promises like that to each other before we find someone else."

"Okay."  I said.

"Okay?  Simple as that?"  He said.

I grabbed him and kissed him again -- more passionately than before.  I
humped him then squeezed his boner.  "Simple as that.  I wanted -- no -- I
NEEDED to know where you stand."

"Geez!"  He said.

"Well?!!"  I exclaimed.

"What?"  He said.

"I love you more than any human being on the earth.  You love me the same.
But ... no promises.  Okay."

"Joshy I - "

"No -- I mean it!  Okay.  I will live with that reality.  But one thing - -
"

"What?"

"The General can't know."

"But the honor sys - "

"I know that's important -- to you."

"It's not to you?"

"Maybe not quite as much.  But okay -- where else can we play -- besides at
home?"

"I don't want to be doing things in tunnels and bathrooms."

"Ew!  Me neither.  Unless that's the only place we can do it."

"We'll figure a way."  He said.  Then he kissed me again, and we walked out
of the tunnel.

"You wanna walk on the beach?"  He asked.

"It's kinda cold."  I said.

"Let's go down there anyway."

We walked down to the beach and again walked in silence for a time until we
approached a bathroom/changing complex.  "I gotta take a dump."  He said.

"Me too -- I guess the walk -- after breakfast did it."

We walked to the bathroom and I tried the door.  It was locked.

"Shit!  I already let it go halfway -- I REALLY have to go now!"  Said my
brother.

The bathroom was constructed with concrete walls with a space at the top.
I looked it up and down, then looked around.  No one was coming so I jumped
to the top of the 8-foot wall and was able to squeeze under the roofline
and drop inside the building.  I unlocked the door.  Nate ran to the
nearest stall.

The lights were off, but there was enough light from outside to see that it
was spotless clean.  I locked the door again and went and took care of my
own business.  By the time I was finished, Nate was washing up.

"Dang, Little brother, I can see my reflection in the floor I think they
redid it for the next season."  He whispered -- in case there was anyone
outside.  I finished up and then washed my own hands.  I carefully cracked
open the door and was about to go out, when Nate grabbed me from behind and
pulled me back in.  He closed and re-locked the door.

I didn't need any more encouragement than that.  I grabbed him and we
kissed each other deeply again, and he took off his jacket and started to
unbutton his shirt.  "BBRRRR! Too cold for that!"  He closed the buttons on
his shirt but then pulled my Levis open and dropped down.  I knew he had to
be cold, because I was, and I still had my jacket on.

He didn't ask as he pulled out my already pulsing boner and wrapped his
warm hand around it.  He kissed me again as he stroked up and down several
times.  He swiped some precum from the opening and brought it up and
sniffed it.  "Oh, Li'l Bro!  I forgot just how good this stuff is!"  He
said as he licked it off his finger.  You have such a sweet taste --
compared to -- well -- anyway -- your stuff is sweet."

"And as I remember -- your's is kind of sour, but -- I still love it!"  I
said.

Ignoring this he immediately dropped down onto his knees-- on his jacket --
and started to suck on my engorged meat.  He pulled down my jeans and
pushed me down on the changing bench and grabbed the top of my butt for an
anchor as he started to quickly get me off.  It wasn't long before I was
whimpering -- trying to be quiet -- as I was ready to blow.  I tried to
push him away before -- but no, he wanted it all.  And he got it and --
swallowed all of my stuff, and kept bobbing and sucking until my meat was
well tenderized and soft.

He then pushed me down onto the bench and climbed on top of me and kissed
me.  Yup!  My spunk is very musky but -- sweet!

When I wanted to reciprocate he said no.  "We can finish this at home --
later."

"But -- Nate!  How about the - "

"Fuck the honor code.  You're emancipated and we're both legal adults!  We
don't live in a military school!  What we do in our room is no one's
business but yours and mine!"  I liked his change in heart.

"Okay."  I said demurely.  He kissed me again, grinding himself into me and
then helped me up.  We listened very carefully, as I buttoned up and he put
his jacket on.  No one was coming, so we stealthily left the room, locking
it behind us.

"We only have tonight, Babe.  I have to go back to the Point tomorrow
afternoon.  But I'll be back for Christmas and we'll have 2 weeks!"

That night after I got off work, no one knew that I didn't bother going
into my own room.  I went directly to Nate.

We got very little sleep that night.  We had to be quiet, but we played
with -- and loved -- each other most of the night, showing each other
things we had learned from being with others.

After Nate left for the Point, I dreamed ... and justified ... and
rationalized.  If Nate changed his attitude about the honor code, then he
might just as easily change it about being with his brother.  I was already
convinced that this was the best of any situation I could think of.

Monday, back at school, after wrestling practice, I worked out in the
weight room for awhile.  Several others were there, including Yock.  We
spotted for each other a couple times and when it was time, we left the
weight room together, talking and bantering as if we were good friends and
nothing had ever happened between us.

We stripped down and went to the showers, and by that time, the footballers
were out and in the showers already.  They looked at us indignantly as we
invaded their territory.  I could tell that this intimidated Yock, so I
took a stance of protection, making sure he got a shower with me between
him and any other jock.

We talked a lot about our Thanksgiving holiday.  He told me about his new
beau, and I told him I was still single -- though I was feeling more and
more together with my big brother.  (I didn't tell him that!)  I didn't pay
much attention to the time -- or that Yock was soaping down while we
chatted.  When he said bye to me, I still needed to wash.

I thought I was alone in the locker room when I went back to my locker.  I
dried off and put on my boxers.  I stood there carefully folding my gym
clothes (Hey!  So I'm anal about my gym clothes!)  when another guy quietly
came from behind me.

"I thought that little dude was never gonna leave!"  He said.

I jumped a little, not realizing anyone was there.  I assumed the Taikwondo
fight position.

"Wo!  Sorry!  I didn't mean to sneak up on you, dude!"

I felt like an idiot.  I dropped my hands and smiled nervously.  "Sorry --
automatic response."  I said.  He was naked, with a towel in his left hand
and was scratching or rubbing his balls with his right hand -- which he
then offered me.  I nearly laughed, but presented my fist, which he bussed.

"I thought that little dude was never gonna leave."  He repeated.

"Huh?"  I was confused.

"The little guy -- the blond kid that you were talking to in the shower?"

"Oh!  Yock!"

"What?"

"Jakub.  He's from Russia."

"Oh.  Anyway -- I've seen you in here before, but you were always so
involved with -- um -- Jakub -- that I never -- I mean -- I thought -- that
-- um - " He stopped cold.

I figured out what he was trying to imply but still said, "Huh?"

"I mean -- are -- er -- that is -- were you and -- um -- Jakub -- um --
together -- or something?"

After he said it he looked around in a 360 degree turn, then whispered.
"Please God -- tell me that you are gay!  I've been watching you -- and
that little guy -- since the first day I noticed the two of you in the
showers.  I didn't suspect either of you until I saw you together. .  My
gaydar is terrible!"

He looked all of a sudden scared that he'd made a huge error.  He was both
bigger and taller than I, but he started to shiver, because it was cold.

"Dude!  It's cold!  Get some clothes on!"  I said, then added, "Did you
want to talk somewhere?"

I could tell I could handle this guy, if it went badly.  He lingered
awkwardly a moment more and I repeated, "Go get dressed."

"Oh!  Yeah!  Lets!"

"Huh?"

""Let's go somewhere and talk."  He said so fast that I had to hear it
first, then figure out what he said He was extremely nervous, looking all
around all the while we talked.

"Go!"  I said, as he still stood there, shivering, naked in front of me.

"Oh!  Yeah!  I'll just go get dressed now."

He walked away and I could have walked out and never seen him again, since
he really never confirmed that we should talk this particular day.

Part of me said run as fast you can -- another part said Wo-wo-wo-wo!  This
guy is cute in his clumsy way of expressing himself.  All of me was
intrigued!  I waited.

"Pssssst!  Hey!  Can you meet me at the Starbucks?"

"It might take me while to get there on the bus."  I said.  "I don't
drive."

"Meet me in the east student parking."  And he left.

I had to ask where the east student parking was.  When I arrived, it was as
big as most sports arena lots!  As if I could find one car -- which I had
no idea what it looked like.  I walked around the lot and finally gave up
and started toward the bus stop on the other side of the campus.

An old Saturn pulled up next to me.  "I thought you weren't coming!"  He
said, stopping next to me.

"Somewhat irritated, I said, "Dude!  The east parking is huge!  I had no
idea what you were driving!  How the - "

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry -- really!  I was nervous.  Get in!"

I walked around the car, looking carefully in to see that no one else was I
the back seat or something, then got in the passenger side.

He breathed a huge sigh and said, "Dude!  Are you gay?"

I closed my eyes and paused a moment.  I could almost feel his heart
beating fast -- even from the passenger seat.  I answered with a question:
"Did you WANT me to be gay?"

"Shit!  You're not, are you?!  I've never asked a guy that in my life -- I
promise!  I'm sorry.  I'm sorry!"

"Are YOU gay?"  I asked.

He looked at me as if I had stabbed him in the stomach.  "Do you think --
um -- do you think -- I am?  I mean -- do I act gay?"

I was pretty sure by now that he WAS gay.  "I've known quite a lot of gay
guys and I have to honestly say -- you don't act like any of them!"  He
relaxed a little.  "But you don't act like most straight guys I know
either.  I'm going to assume for the moment that you ARE gay -- since you
asked ME first."  I said, and as he looked like an animal that any minute
might jump out of his car and leave me there, I told him.  "Relax, Dude.
I'm gay."

He started hyperventilating and saying, "Okay -- okay -- okay -- okay."

"Dude!  Calm down -- you're too young for a stroke!"

He went limp for a moment then he reclined his seat and breathed deep for
at least 30 seconds.  "Omigosh -- you must think I'm some kind of a freak!"

"I don't know about that, but you were definitely freaking me out for
awhile."  I said.  "And you still haven't told me why you asked me if I was
gay -- of if you are."

"I don't know."  He said relatively calmly, then "I DUNNO!!"

He pulled into a parking spot and shut off the engine.

"What do you want -- from me?"  I asked.

"I guess -- to tell me -- if I am -- gay -- or not."

"My shrink says a lot of guys don't know that until they are over 25.  But
I'm 15 and I know!"  How old are you?"

"Me?  I'm 19.  And I've always been -- um -- well -- interested -- or
wondered -- if I was maybe somehow somewhat -- I mean -- you know --
attracted -- to guys."

"I think -- that -- whether you are gay -- or not -- you should know if you
are attracted to guys -- at the moment.  What made you ask me in the first
place.  You must have been - um -- attracted to me or -- maybe Yock. I
don't even know your name!"

"I'm Morty.  Morty Rankowiscz.  And you?"

"I'm Joshua."

"Joshua?  Great!  Are you Jewish too?  This is fantast -- WHAT!!??  Wait a
minute!!  Did you say that you're 15??!!  FUCK!  How do I do it?  I had to
pick a guy who is jail bait!  Fuck!"

"Well as far as I can tell, you haven't done anything illegal -- unless
using that foul language with a minor is illegal.  And for the record, I'm
emancipated.  I'm responsible for myself.  I'm legal!"

He looked at me for a moment.  "You're shittin' me -- right?"  He said.  No
fuckin' way you can be only 15!"

"Sigh!  There you go again with the language.  I'll be 16 right after the
first of the year.  And I AM legal."

He relaxed again then said, "So -- are you -- Jewish?"

"I'm trying not to be."

"What?"

"Now I AM shittin' you.  I'm not Jewish.  I'm Joshua Black.  Now -- are we
going to Starbucks -- or not?"

Morty had tight curly black hair.  His eyes were deep blue-ish, and as
round as saucers.  He had freckles high up on his cheeks.  He had his hair
cropped short, and it was obvious that it had a mind of its own.  At the
moment, the right half was hanging halfway down to his eye brows, making
him look much younger than his supposed 19 years.

"Starbucks?  Oh, heh, I almost forgot.  Well, as long as I'm robbing the
cradle, I may as well buy!"

"That'd be fine.  I'm pretty easy.  I hate coffee.  But I like hot
chocolate with a little taste of coffee in it."

"One Mocha Latte coming up!"  He said starting the car.

"No -- no.  Too strong for me.  Never mind, I'll order."

On the way to the Starbucks, he never stopped talking, marveling over how I
could possibly be only 15, how it seemed to be his lot to choose people in
his life that were juxtaposed to all he was taught as a boy, (I was happy
to meet a guy who could articulate -- and expected me to understand
... which of course ... I did!)

The only table left was a two place table in the middle of the shop by a
window.  Half the patrons were from the college.  He ordered straight,
black coffee and I ordered hot chocolate with a 1/2" of decaf at the
bottom.

Because of the many people all around us we could not really discuss what
he wanted to, so we talked about everything else we could.  I was quickly
wondering how anyone could be so much like myself -- and not be related.
We liked all the same things!  He laughed and asked if I might have been
Jewish in another life!  Our faces were nose to nose for most of the
conversation across that little round table.

When we left, he asked, "Can I give you a lift home?"

"It's quite a ways.  I can catch the bus."  I said.

"It's okay.  I've got time and this little old car gets 32 miles to a
gallon of gas.  Besides - "

He didn't say any more, but I knew what he was feeling.  I wanted to stay
with him longer too.  We passed a Red Lobster and he asked if I was hungry.
Suspecting I knew something about his religion, he said, "We're not
Orthodox.  For my family, Judaism is more a culture than a religion."

"Oh".  I answered.  I don't go to church."

"I mean -- Orthodox Jews won't eat shellfish.  My parents think that's old
fashioned and outmoded.  I believe in the Torah, but some things that were
practiced in Moses' time are not necessary now.  We don't stone adulterers
or harlots any more.  And pork and shellfish are not hard to preserve any
more!  And -- we LIKE them!"

I called and told Mom that I wouldn't be home for dinner.

The more I looked at Morty's eyes the brighter they seemed to glow.  In the
Red Lobster, they looked more green than blue.  But they were totally clear
-- and totally white around the iris.  The hostess tried to seat us in the
middle of the room, but he pointed to a dark corner table, and she showed
us to it.

"What's the Torah?"

"If you know the Bible, it's very much like a lot of the Old Testament."

"I don't know much about the Bible, but I learned about David and Goliath a
few weeks ago -- and David and Jonathan.  "They were gay -- right?"

"Wha -- at?" He looked at me like I was a space alien.

"Do you know the story?"  I asked.

"Of course!  Every Jew knows about David."

"Well, a friend showed me -- I read it for myself -- where as soon as
Jonathan -- the Prince of Judah -- saw David -- after David reported to the
king -- (Saul was it?) after killing the giant."

"Yes."

"Well anyway, Jonathan fell in love with David as soon as he saw him.  They
loved each other as themselves.  It read like love at first sight."

"David was well loved by many people.  He was very handsome and very brave,
which everyone admired and loved.  But David had many wives.  I don't think
he was gay."  Said Morty, almost assuming a haughtiness that I didn't like.

"Maybe he was bi!"  I said, challenging him.

Morty reached in his glove box and produced a Torah.  He looked up where
David was brought to Saul and read it aloud.

"Well, Fuck me!"  He exclaimed.  "I never read it that way.  You could be
right.  Maybe he WAS bi.  So -- what do you think?  Do you think I am gay?"

"Maybe you're bi!  I dunno.  Have you dated anyone?"

"No one."

"You mean -- at nineteen, you've never dated?"

"Pretty incredible, huh?"  He looked at me with almost pleading eyes.

"I wish I could tell you what you want to know.  But only you can decide
that.  If you have any questions, I dunno how qualified I am to answer
them, but I seem to be your only option at the moment.  So I'll try."

"I'd like to ask you one thing."

"What's that?"

"I've never -- um -- kissed anyone.  What does it feel like?"

"I don't know how to tell you that ... in words."  I said.  "And I don't
think this would be the place to -- show you."

"No -- I guess not.  But -- just talking about these things with you -- has
made me very -- um excited -- hee hee -- if you know what I mean."

"I think I do."  I said.

"Are you?"

"I already told you.  I know I'm gay."

"No -- are you excited -- talking about this -- with me.  Um -- do you
think I am attractive?"

"I can easily say that I think that you are a very cute guy."  His hand
went down to push something down in his crotch.  "And I can also easily say
that -- your reaction to what I just said was not exactly heterosexual."

"Well, I can easily say that -- YOU are very attractive -- hot even!"  He
whispered.  "And I definitely want to know you -- much better."

He paid the bill (I paid the tip) and when we pulled up to my house, he
asked if I would kiss him.  Clouds covered the stars and moon -- if there
was any -- so it was very dark in his car.  I leaned across the center
console and kissed his tightly closed mouth. His eyes were also tightly
closed.

Notes: Well, do we get to experiment the Jewish-mother--guilt thing now?
Comments welcome -- to Steve at stevethomas535@hotmail.com.  Thanks and
... Love, Steve